0:01

Welcome, Welcome to adulting. He

0:03

made it across the burning Sands. I'm Jordan Carlos,

0:05

I'm here. That's always my co from go Michelby

0:07

to Hello Michelle. You look beauteous as always.

0:10

What is Casey Kaseum is going on? Is

0:12

this bandstand or is this.

0:14

Adulting American Bandstand?

0:16

Yeah? Like I liked to I always wanted to be that guy.

0:18

I wanted to be that guy.

0:19

I wanted to be like you know, Meg Cow in the morning

0:21

or Casey Kaseum with a top forty countdown

0:23

and yes, and sometimes they bring a dollup

0:26

and a dab of that to our show.

0:28

Okay, And now Michael Bolton, now

0:30

I.

0:30

Know why Jordan stopped drinking

0:32

caffeine.

0:50

Oh my god, Otis said fuck the other day.

0:52

What We're watching this movie Elemental,

0:54

okay, and the little

0:57

fire girl goes what the and then

0:59

Otis goes fuck And

1:02

I was like, what he

1:04

just said fuck? I was like, no, he didn't, and

1:07

he goes, oh, it is what you say. He goes fuck

1:10

fuck and I was like,

1:13

oh, but the movie was so good. We're like you

1:15

shouldn't say it because it's a really He's like,

1:17

oh, and he was just watching the movie. And I'm like, I

1:19

don't even know how to talk to a

1:21

four year old because their mind is everywhere.

1:24

Yeah, they're a little too cute to correct. Like,

1:27

he doesn't know what a bad word is yet. I mean,

1:29

my son, he'll remind me

1:32

that I'm cursing in front of him.

1:33

Okay.

1:34

He'll be like, Dad, you're using bad words. So I'm

1:36

like, okay, I won't do it, do you.

1:38

Yeah?

1:38

Yeah, I love that. He's a New York City kid. He's

1:41

bound to find these words out anyway. And

1:43

if anything, that story just tells me that the

1:45

African American Diesperatic

1:48

Caribbean in him is strong. Because

1:50

the column response was right there, what

1:52

the fuck?

1:53

He joined in? You know what I'm saying. The ancestors

1:55

were speaking out look.

1:57

Get with the rhythm the room. Yeah,

2:01

you know.

2:02

The other day, Hazel's teacher told

2:04

me that she called him something

2:07

mean, but you couldn't remember because we're also tired.

2:10

I was like, okay, and I asked her later and

2:12

she said a dummy head and I was like, oh,

2:15

whoa. His feelings were hurt and he

2:17

was like yeah. She was laughing like it was funny. And when she

2:19

told me, I was like, it's kind of funny because

2:22

I'm a stand up comedian, you know, And so how

2:24

do I talk to her?

2:26

You know, obviously yes, be nice,

2:28

but like.

2:29

What did you tell her? What was the substance of what you told

2:31

her?

2:32

Sometimes we say things

2:34

that hurt someone's feelings, and we don't

2:36

do that.

2:36

We don't hurt feelings. We lift people up.

2:38

Oh, if someone's being mean to you, then

2:41

you can tell them the fuck off. I

2:45

mean, I'm trying, but I don't want to be like,

2:48

like, I'm not a goop mom.

2:50

Right, you know what I mean?

2:51

But I want to ooh do

2:53

you know what I mean?

2:54

How would you describe your m O, your motherhood MO?

2:56

In three words?

2:58

Three words? How fucking

3:00

dare you? Those are?

3:01

Wait?

3:01

Three words? It's

3:04

four words?

3:05

But like it's hard to know, it's hard to

3:07

know you're doing the right things. They're good kids. Yeah,

3:10

and you know what it's.

3:11

Gonna compassion structure.

3:13

I oh my gosh,

3:16

compassion structure joy the CSJ.

3:19

I love that. That's really good. Yeah,

3:21

what about you? Four

3:23

words? More fun?

3:25

Why do you get four and I get three?

3:27

I just asked for them. It's it's we're just making it. I

3:29

can't do it.

3:30

Okay, okay, fine, three words

3:32

funner than mom, that's

3:34

it.

3:35

Those are the three words.

3:37

If there was an air horn to blast

3:39

in someone's little ear pods right

3:41

now, how fucking do it?

3:45

Michelle, you have no idea? On election day?

3:47

Yeah, Challa took over. It took

3:49

over.

3:50

Jordan came alive, really jumped

3:52

off the bench, like my name was mj.

3:56

She was like, Jesus, take the wheels on Oprah.

3:58

Yes.

3:59

So, typically in New York or I guess you're

4:01

around the country. In the US,

4:03

the kids stay home because a lot of these schools

4:06

are where you.

4:07

Can go vote. Right, yep, that's what it is.

4:09

They called voting poles is up, they're called right. And

4:11

so the kids are home and you decide to be fall

4:14

the of the year.

4:15

No, it's just that you could see the thousand

4:17

yard stairs from mom, you know, like

4:20

you could see that you could just it

4:22

wasn't the it was the miles, you know what I'm saying,

4:24

Like moms are just so tired, and

4:27

like we have this really great kind of

4:29

web of like parents and like

4:31

they call if they need like a playdate, just some

4:33

time off, but it was like the lines were

4:35

getting jammed. Do you see what I'm saying. It's like because everybody

4:38

was off at the same time. So I was like, let's

4:40

just do this thing. So we went

4:42

to the city Butterflies Boom, butterflies.

4:45

Yeah, Invisible World boom, Squid in the Whale boom.

4:47

Then we go across town Serendipity three boom

4:50

hit them. Yeah, kids, you want to go on the ski

4:52

lift across the Roosevelt on.

4:53

What is that? What's that? Get

4:56

in the ski lift.

4:57

I got my kids and another kid, and we

4:59

don't come back till they ask

5:01

for us.

5:02

Do you see what I'm saying. I love that.

5:04

I love that you make core memories.

5:05

Yeah, you know, and it's really great that

5:07

you step in and make a great day.

5:09

We got to do it all the time as parents for each other.

5:11

Yeah, it's all the time.

5:13

It's like, we got to do it all the time. Yeah.

5:14

Man, at five pm, sometimes

5:17

I get I feel a little anxious because I'm

5:19

like, there's so much more to the day and

5:21

i just want to crawl up on the couch and just watch

5:23

TV and have a glass of wine.

5:25

And you should you should be able to do that.

5:27

But I don't have time for that. I got to make

5:29

the dinner. He makes the dinner, and we like hang

5:31

out and then we eat the dinner, and then we bathe and go

5:33

to bed, and then you get this like half hour to

5:35

yourself. But it really isn't to yourself,

5:38

right, And then like for me, if

5:40

I have an event that night or a show, I

5:43

do all that before I do that show at the

5:45

event, and then I wake up in the morning.

5:46

You do the same thing.

5:47

So like, but I also, you know me,

5:49

I'm a big planner. That's why I'm just like, hey, y'all, what

5:51

you do in is date? We got have a party because I

5:53

like to also plan fun.

5:55

Yeah.

5:56

Yeah, you're a great host. That's where that's

5:58

where you shine and you love it. Yeah, but I

6:00

wonder could you ever and I know

6:03

you do take naps for yourself, but do you make a routine

6:05

or a habit of just like being like these thirty

6:07

minutes no matter what rain or shiner mine.

6:09

I mean when they're not home

6:12

or like on the weekend. Yeah, right, but like when they're

6:14

back from school. No, it's hard. Yeah,

6:16

I feel you. It's blood sport, Yeah

6:18

it is. You have the three or four hours before. Yeah,

6:21

no, what do you even mean?

6:23

Are they at least bringing their dish to

6:25

the sink at the end of

6:27

dinner? No?

6:28

No, I try. I try.

6:31

It's very hard. It's very

6:33

hard.

6:34

At this point, it's more work

6:36

for me to ask them to take their dish to the

6:38

sink.

6:38

Right, What a time to be alive.

6:40

What a boring fucking podcast.

6:42

It's not boring.

6:43

Shechelle is tied.

6:45

Michelle. This is this is real.

6:46

This is like what people want

6:48

on No, they want the bes

6:51

oh please, they want the Butteau, oh please.

6:53

Behind the scenes. Oh my god.

6:54

Well I'm living. Well, here's what I

6:56

will.

6:57

Say, get it out, get it out right.

6:58

Here's what I will.

6:59

Say at the end of the day when

7:01

I sit in my bed or I lay down in my bed and I

7:03

run it all back. I'm just like I wouldn't have

7:06

done it differently, Like I'd rather be tired and

7:08

present than like rested

7:10

and missing stuff. Like I take my

7:12

spot days with my friends, I have my little

7:14

boozy brunches, and I have a really

7:16

fun fucking job.

7:17

Yeah. But yeah, man,

7:19

I feel I'm gonna be tired either way.

7:22

So it's just like I'm also to be tired doing something

7:24

I love and be with someone I love, you know what I

7:26

mean?

7:26

Yeah? Yeah, but ooh baby, it's

7:29

the price.

7:29

Yeah, And I don't want to be like I don't wanna.

7:32

I don't want to be that bitch that's always out in public

7:34

and just like I'm tired, you know what I

7:36

mean, Like, well what did you do?

7:38

There's always a competition.

7:39

I'm always just like winning because I'm

7:41

better and I'm more tired.

7:42

You know, I don't want to be that bitch, right right? I

7:45

haven't slept in days, yeah, like.

7:47

Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

7:49

But I also don't know how to be high with

7:51

my kids. Like I see some parents like

7:53

and they figured it out. I'm like, how are you use

7:55

such a good move? They're like shrooms and

7:57

they have like a little twinkle in their eye. I'm like, do

8:00

you just hug a tree with your kid? How

8:02

did you do that?

8:03

Oh?

8:04

My god?

8:04

Like, I'm just trying to fucking

8:07

get a straight line down my kid's

8:09

head for pigtails.

8:10

But you become more like kid like when

8:12

you get high.

8:13

You're fun already, but you get even more

8:15

like childlike and fun.

8:18

You do no, you do?

8:20

Oh? I do like one does or I do?

8:22

You know you do, Michelle Buteu. When you get

8:25

nice, you seem to.

8:27

Like, wait, like tipsy

8:29

or high.

8:30

It's hard because they feel the same

8:32

yeah with you. Yeah, it's like and so

8:34

I feel no.

8:35

When I'm high, is giving? Are we okay?

8:37

Like?

8:37

Am I talking too much?

8:39

The last time I got high with you was in Maine and we were

8:41

at your friend's house that was on the side of a mountain.

8:44

And I was like, we're all gonna roll down,

8:47

and they.

8:47

Had a really sweet, huge German

8:49

shepherd, yes, whose face was just up

8:51

in my children's face. I'm like, I'm cool, Bliss,

8:54

I'm cool, and it was a sweet dog.

8:56

Shout outs to Bliss. All right, So I understand.

8:59

I would just two point five milligrams

9:01

THC. That's like taking an etcetera.

9:04

And then you're just like you're chill and you

9:06

can read one more Doctor SEUs book or not because

9:08

he's been canceled. It's up to you, you know what I'm saying,

9:10

Like I've done it. It's not it's not my

9:12

bag. I want it to be like,

9:15

it's not like I'm fighting it. Yeah,

9:17

like I've tried it. Are you like timetables,

9:19

do you like get them in bed by a certain time

9:22

every night? Like dinner

9:24

is on the table this time, baths at this time.

9:26

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, ish

9:29

yeah, I got you give or take fifteen minutes please

9:31

please?

9:31

Do you know, come on, that's life.

9:33

Yeah, but I understand dinner is usually

9:35

around six, bath around seven

9:38

thirty, bed eight.

9:40

It used to be dinner at five.

9:41

It's a lot of pressure. It is a lot of pressure because

9:43

your days shorter. But I'm just like, how do people

9:45

do this?

9:46

Oh?

9:46

Yeah, they did do it because they didn't do anything all day,

9:49

just like cleaning your tup.

9:50

Aware it had like a

9:52

fucking like Mary Kay meeting,

9:55

you know what I mean.

9:56

They weren't doing like five different projects

9:58

on a big fucking plast.

10:00

You know.

10:01

That's what they call the second shift. Like

10:03

you're doing another job, you

10:05

know, and you're already doing, like the job that

10:07

you already have is like two jobs.

10:09

It is fun. I tell you what, man.

10:11

When I do these shows and I see

10:13

these people from all walks of life. They

10:15

are young twenties up to

10:17

like late seventies, enjoying

10:21

the words that come out of my mouth. It's

10:24

so weird to actually be this thing that brings

10:26

people together. But it's always been that

10:28

way anyways, right, like whether it's a meat ball

10:30

party or a comedy show or

10:32

TV show, And I'm just like, God, damn, this

10:35

is really really nice. Sometimes I think about

10:37

you loving to fall

10:39

asleep at a party. I do, And I

10:41

love the way you described it. You're just like I just hear

10:43

like the little ambient sounds of people having

10:46

great conversations, and that's often

10:48

how I feel when I'm awake, like

10:51

I'm taking a moment from me. But I'm also

10:53

just like, look at all these people, like still having

10:55

fun. It's giving like an emotional weekend at Bernie's.

10:58

Whatever you think that is. I understand all of that,

11:00

you know. I love the fact that it's sold out seats

11:02

to see Mishi Bee speak.

11:04

I'm I'm here for that.

11:05

You know, Like you seem

11:07

to get up and do it all

11:10

every day. You're like maximum

11:12

poor, yeah, don't you.

11:15

I

11:18

I think.

11:18

I'm I'm probably I'm probably

11:20

at eighty percent battery power every day, okay,

11:23

But I feel like I do a lot.

11:24

I do a lot. I have my little list of winds

11:27

and everything like that on my phone. I do a

11:29

lot. I am always impressed by your friend. You

11:31

know that, Oh thank you.

11:32

I just want you to know that if it

11:34

have a too much, you know, always

11:37

call.

11:38

You know what I'm saying, thank you, babyface, because

11:40

you make it look easy.

11:41

But there's this old picture of

11:43

like a ballet dancer. You see the shoe

11:45

on point. You see the shoe on point right then

11:48

they take the shoe off and you see all

11:50

the Yeah, you see what I'm saying.

11:52

Yeah, Oh my god, am I a

11:54

ballerina's foot?

11:55

I'm not.

11:56

It's like I try to have these sweet moments.

11:59

I do.

12:02

I do feel, Yes, I

12:04

do feel like a plus sized ballerina,

12:07

those tiptoeing around

12:09

and too too trying to make it all happen.

12:11

Being busy is wild.

12:13

Being successful is different than

12:15

being busy because you don't have

12:18

to be busy to be successful, if that

12:20

makes sense. But you also can

12:22

be like it really is like one

12:24

of those weird things. My dad always said,

12:26

work smart, not hard. And that's what

12:28

I do love about our guest for

12:31

this episode. I mean she's a motherfucking

12:33

powerhouse, yes, and so sweet

12:35

truly. I mean she

12:38

gave us a job.

12:40

She gave us a job when no one else would and

12:44

we're just too too lowly interns.

12:46

Yes she is.

12:48

She's the co host of my favorite murder.

12:50

Yes, and she's also

12:53

the co owner of exactly Right Media exactly

12:55

Right podcast Network.

12:56

I'm so sorry, don't at me.

13:00

We'll fix it in post.

13:01

And I'm so happy that she is available

13:04

to sit down and talk to us, because Georgia

13:06

and Karen are really fucking cool, and they're

13:08

really fucking smart, and they're also really fucking busy,

13:11

and so speaking about how busy

13:13

and tired, well, at least

13:15

I am all the time, because I'm at one hundred percent and you're

13:17

an eighty. I'm

13:21

really glad that she has just like found the time

13:23

to fucking hang with us. So you guys, please

13:26

enjoy this episode of It's

13:29

Adulting.

13:29

I was like, what's the name of the show is adult.

13:32

Please enjoy this episode with our guests.

13:35

Georgia heart start, Oh

13:38

my god, put her on the charging station.

13:40

Good lord, Oh.

13:49

Oh my god. It's so good to see you guys. It's

13:51

been so long.

13:52

I know, yeah, I don't

13:54

even know when in person, especially with

13:57

the COVID in such Seriously.

13:59

We were kids no children.

14:01

We're different people.

14:02

I really was.

14:03

I believed in the

14:05

elders that they would take care of us, see,

14:08

and then I realized I had to take care of myself.

14:10

Who Yeah, was that

14:12

the journey?

14:13

Look, not to get into it. But here's the funk.

14:15

We are everyone.

14:16

I know, how many friends

14:18

and or family members do you think you have

14:21

like stopped talking to AKA

14:23

long since Trump

14:25

and COVID?

14:27

Unfortunately mine is like my mom

14:29

and dad.

14:30

Oh so I'm not

14:33

there yet to like totally cut

14:35

off, but I have worked very hard with boundaries,

14:37

yes, how to turn myself into

14:40

a gray rock and not engage.

14:42

Wow, oh my god, gray

14:45

rock, gray rock? Yeah?

14:47

Wow?

14:48

Do we call that the great shedding? Is that what

14:50

it is? People? The great

14:52

shedding? That's wild.

14:54

I think it's like you almost quietly

14:56

quit the people. I mean, I'm I'm

14:58

such a like little nice

15:00

guy that I'm like, I'm gonna quietly quit you, and

15:03

that's been it. And I'm just kind of burrowing a tonnel

15:05

like Tim Robbins and Shawshank Redemption

15:08

to get away from certain family members and

15:10

things like that.

15:10

But here we are, you know.

15:12

Yeah, I remember Jordan said something

15:14

like years ago because like, one of the questions we got for

15:16

adulting years

15:18

ago was how do you like get

15:21

rid of a friend or how do you stop being friends with

15:23

someone? And Jordan was like, friends

15:25

are like garbage cans, Like you

15:27

never really get rid of them.

15:28

They just roll around and roll back, or as some shit

15:30

you said.

15:31

And every time I take my trash shot, I'm like, yeah,

15:33

wish friend, is this right?

15:35

Some have baggots in them and some need

15:38

to be hosed down every once in a while.

15:40

And yeah, summer

15:42

rubber maids.

15:43

Honestly you have to talk to the trash guy and be like

15:45

and slip them a fucking twenty to take.

15:47

It right or something like your hook your neighbor

15:49

was steal so like you don't have to.

15:50

Deal with anymore.

15:52

Oh truly?

15:53

Yees, Oh my goodness. Yeah

15:55

that's a good analogy.

15:56

I mean, come on, it's happening

15:58

again. Yeah, with the

16:01

whole discussion about trans

16:04

and non binary people, and I'm like, I

16:07

don't I just how many waves

16:10

of people in my life? Am I'm really going

16:12

to cut off?

16:13

Yeah?

16:13

Ending Facebook has helped, Ending Facebook

16:16

has I don't need to know everyone's birthday?

16:19

What is this?

16:20

Like?

16:20

What do I do to do your birthday.

16:21

Yeah, I honestly thought you were saying Facebook

16:23

had ended. I was like,

16:24

what.

16:28

Ding dong?

16:29

The witches dead? Like, why are the munchkins

16:32

not dancing? I see

16:34

what you're saying, getting off of social media because it's only divisive

16:37

thing.

16:37

Yeah.

16:38

I wish it was just my family that I could because

16:40

I can yell at my family and tell that

16:43

what they're doing wrong. Yeah, but I can't do

16:45

that like on social media to strangers.

16:48

Yeah.

16:49

So it's hard, like almost like wish I.

16:50

Could keep Facebook, not really but

16:52

that style and not deal

16:55

with the strangers on like

16:57

Instagram.

16:58

You know.

16:58

Yeah, how do you you maintain

17:00

a healthy relationship with social media

17:03

because it's going to be in our lives forever and all of the time.

17:05

I don't.

17:08

I try.

17:08

I don't know.

17:08

I you know, everyone's like, don't read the comments.

17:11

And it's just so hard for me because I do get that hit

17:13

of dopamine when it's like good, yeah,

17:15

but I also get it when it's bad because I get

17:17

all fired up yeah wow,

17:19

and then someone will defend me because

17:21

I can't say anything, and then I get fired up from that

17:24

person. It's just like, yeah,

17:26

I don't post really anymore on Instagram because

17:28

I just like, I don't know, like I got sick of

17:31

sharing. It just felt like content

17:33

after a while instead of my actual life.

17:35

Yeah, and every time i'd go out somewhere, I'd

17:37

be like, I gotta get content.

17:39

It's like, why I just fucking enjoy yourself?

17:41

Yeah, well, because, I mean, we all work for Instagram.

17:43

I got my W two last year. I'm

17:45

really excited about it. But like,

17:48

do you ever feel like I sometimes

17:50

think like I'm going to go on a limb and

17:52

just say, like Michelle Georgia, you're both like straight

17:54

A students.

17:57

Me, Yeah, I wasn't. I was in

17:59

rehab.

18:00

You were not.

18:02

Okay, what would this double chin get

18:04

out of here?

18:05

No, it's just I barely graduated

18:07

high school and I dropped out of college.

18:09

Oh that part okay? Cool? C coo coo cool? So

18:12

fuck me my theory.

18:13

Yeah, truly, I am a perfectionist though,

18:15

You're right about that.

18:16

That's what I mean. That's what I mean.

18:17

It's like, yeah, what you're getting is instinct

18:20

and truth. That's what you're getting, and sometimes

18:22

that's all you fucking need to really sur I mean, take

18:24

Nataro dropped out of high school too, and she's one of

18:26

the smartest people I fucking know.

18:27

Right she did shed yeah

18:29

wow.

18:30

Yeah.

18:31

So that's why, like when people are like, where are your kids

18:33

going to school? I'm like, wherever they feel

18:35

like it, or they don't have to write

18:37

wherever they thrive. It's fine exactly.

18:41

I love that word.

18:42

Yeah.

18:42

I feel the same way as long as my kids either go to Smith

18:44

or Brown, but go ahead.

18:48

But I am a perfectionist and I want to do everything right.

18:51

Like I saw me recently that was like when I get to

18:53

the TSA like line, I have

18:55

to be the best at it, and I want the security guards

18:57

to be like that girl is a legend.

18:59

She's so good.

19:00

Go Like, I want to do it all correctly

19:02

and best driving everything.

19:05

So there is a part of me that goes to social media

19:07

like this has to be the best post every

19:09

da and it's exhausting.

19:11

I'm just so hung up on TSA.

19:12

But like, do you ever get a high five

19:15

from a TSA officer that's like you did

19:17

that the best?

19:17

Is I should? I really should?

19:19

Oh my gosh.

19:20

You know that thing of like.

19:22

I'm doing it all right so I can complain about

19:24

other people. Well, you hope that people

19:26

like will watch you and be like, that's how it's done,

19:28

right you.

19:29

Guys Like I raise my arms

19:31

up and do that little like whatever

19:34

the diamond side to do the jay Z sign above

19:36

my head, perfect diamond and a smile,

19:39

and they're still like, we're gonna have to patch you down.

19:41

I'm like, but I did the diamond.

19:43

With a smile, you know, yeah, And it just

19:45

hurts my heart and I feel as though.

19:48

But don't you have metal in your body? Don't

19:50

you have like something like yeah, he's

19:52

had like a back surgery.

19:53

Oh yeah, okay, metal

19:56

in my body.

19:57

Yeah. When I wear a bra with the wire, they're

19:59

like, call back up. I'm like, it's

20:02

just double d's bitch. The right one's bigger,

20:04

if you must know, do you know what I mean? Like,

20:06

it's fucked up.

20:08

Yeah.

20:08

The other day they had to check my daughter's hair and I'm

20:10

like, how fucking dare you what? I

20:13

would put drugs in my booty hole before I put

20:15

it in my little daughter's hair.

20:16

Fuck that noise?

20:17

Yeah, she can't stay still anyways when

20:19

I do her hair. That's wild.

20:21

Sometimes there's like a family in front of

20:23

me and if I'm flying solo. Then I'll just

20:25

switch lines and then like they'll look

20:27

at me like, oh, you know the disrespect,

20:30

you know. But I'm like, you've got a three year old, you got

20:32

a toddler? Yeah, and like leave

20:34

me alone, like I have to do this, or

20:37

when you're behind like old people

20:40

like that's oh my gosh.

20:42

Am I an angel because I sit and

20:44

I watch and I wait for when they need

20:46

help and I'm like, I got you.

20:47

What meds are you on? Because I need those?

20:50

Yeah, I'm looking for some now

20:52

I'm not on any Oh mine aren't working.

20:55

I mean I straight up to my job and

20:57

I definitely have made my ass clench so

20:59

hard. I don't have an ass anymore. I should get a Brazilian

21:01

butt lift at some point for Kwanta,

21:04

But you know, I'm gonna ride it out lol, and

21:06

see if tired

21:08

mom working booties are gonna

21:10

come back, just like Crenoline, so

21:14

you know we're bell bottoms.

21:15

Everything finds its way back Krenaline.

21:18

I love.

21:19

Yeah.

21:19

I mean I try to be as patient as possible with people

21:21

in the airport because I do realize this is like a big

21:24

undertaking for them. I know they booked

21:26

the trip they left their house. This isn't

21:28

something they do often. Yeah, and so I just

21:30

wait, watch and see. Because even my parents are really good

21:32

travelers. They always like make jokes

21:35

to my mom and my dad, and I'm just like,

21:37

if you would have believed in me the way Matthew Knowles believed

21:39

in Beyonce and Solange,

21:42

right, we could have been flying private. Bitch that

21:44

part, No, take your little with the pitic shoe off

21:47

and put it in a fucking tray.

21:48

I don't think I could travel with children or

21:50

my parents like I would help people.

21:53

Mm hmm.

21:53

Yeah.

21:54

I don't want to seem like a total asshole.

21:55

But no, that's okay. It is like an episode

21:58

of The Amazing Race with no fucking price. So

22:00

that's why I'm just like, I can't read a map,

22:02

my brain goes cuckoo, but I can travel

22:05

with these dummies yea. And also one time I

22:07

travel with my friend's cat because she has so many

22:09

pets.

22:09

She went from New York.

22:10

To LA and her cat, Olivia

22:13

Newton John, who gained

22:15

weight and didn't even fit in the bag. I was like, I don't want a

22:17

cat, shame, but you gain

22:19

weight And we had a stuff from the bag.

22:21

I was like, what in the Southwest is going on? This

22:23

is not okay? And I've never traveled

22:25

with the cat before. They make you take it out,

22:28

right, yeah?

22:29

How are there not more cats running around the airport?

22:32

Have you go into private room and

22:35

then the cat runs under like a fucking

22:37

piece of equipment?

22:38

May yeah that was a cat.

22:41

I like the one where like the cat is like

22:43

stuck in a ball, like it's

22:46

like this space ball that they can look out.

22:48

Oh yeah, yeah yeah. Have you ever traveled

22:50

that way with your kiddie?

22:51

I No, I don't do I thankfully

22:53

don't do that travel with the animals.

22:56

But I can't imagine the cat wants

22:58

to see the outside world that much,

23:01

right yeah, right, Like the confusion

23:04

of it seems a little intense,

23:06

right right.

23:07

I have two questions you guys. Okay,

23:09

have you guys met and or worked with a

23:12

person who is not necessarily

23:14

at the top of their game but very talented,

23:16

like really talented, but just

23:19

still so fucking miserable?

23:20

Oh my god?

23:21

Yes, okay, why are you looking at me like that? Okay?

23:27

But I'm just I got way too personal.

23:29

But seriously, like I am starting to run into

23:31

people where I'm just like, is it trauma?

23:33

Yeah?

23:33

What the fuck is it?

23:34

Like I can understand someone

23:37

who hasn't figured it out and they're

23:39

like I know everything because they don't

23:41

and you figured them out, or like, you know, I

23:43

don't know anything and I'm miserable because people have found

23:45

me out whatever it is. But like someone who's actually good

23:48

that brings the bad energy,

23:50

I'm like, what where is

23:52

this coming from?

23:54

That's childhood trauma. I think that.

23:56

I think perfectionism is like a

23:59

great way to be miserable no matter

24:01

what you achieve, you know, mm. I

24:03

think that is a hard one to like get past.

24:06

Yeah.

24:06

I mean sometimes it's kind of like I understand

24:09

it's like it's so cautionary, but it's

24:11

like I recently went to

24:13

this like big old celebs apartment

24:16

a flex a Flex and it

24:19

was Pinouts apartment and they were just like, yeah.

24:22

Man, I don't know, I don't know about stuff.

24:24

And I'm just like, oh wow, you know, like

24:26

that's really cool. We're never gonna hang out, but this is

24:28

really cool. And to see this as like, dope,

24:31

you look remind me of Batman and I gotta go, you

24:33

know, Like it was like name names.

24:37

I can't do that.

24:38

They're not happy with what they had.

24:39

They were they were just they were not happy with what they

24:41

had and they wanted more. But

24:44

this person is like so successful,

24:46

so powerful in the game, and they

24:48

just still yeah, it's still not

24:51

good enough. Like I think my

24:53

wildest dreams are their lowest expectations,

24:55

and I'm.

24:55

Just like, this is crazy,

24:58

Like I guess I don't totally understand. And what's

25:01

the word when you try really hard for things?

25:03

You know, ambition? I don't get ambition, Like

25:07

when people are super ambitious, and I'm

25:10

like, don't you taking a nap?

25:12

Like, have you heard of naps? Oh?

25:14

I love naps, you guys, now, I don't. I

25:16

don't nap.

25:17

I know I have to.

25:18

What is so great about naps? You

25:21

feel refreshed, don't you answer?

25:23

Reset on your entire day? Yes,

25:25

you feel refreshed. You have the whole rest

25:27

of the day to like it's like having two days in one.

25:30

It is, And it's like it's the same thing

25:32

as like the way your first cup of coffee

25:34

works for you. You're just like, let's go.

25:37

That's what it just feels like, like cold eye patches.

25:40

You're just like mama runner.

25:42

That's so true, right, Okay, the

25:45

napping order in my house is like tied between

25:47

my dog and my wife, and so like

25:50

like who naps the longest?

25:52

She just wakes up.

25:53

It's oh no,

25:56

She's like, I'm taking twenty minutes, I'm gonna go for

25:58

a nap, Go ahead, comes down.

25:59

What the fuck is all this?

26:01

Is it?

26:02

Two hours later? Does she like?

26:04

No, she comes down twenty minutes later, maybe.

26:05

She meets two hours.

26:07

Yeah, she can have them.

26:12

Let it go into a deep rim sleep,

26:14

just like let mama go.

26:15

You ever had those naps? Were just like I'm gonna go

26:18

all the way all night.

26:19

Yeah, and you don't have to set an alarm nap.

26:21

That's amazing.

26:22

Yeah, oh wow.

26:24

To me, that's my ambition is success to

26:26

me means I'm able to take a nap in the middle of the

26:28

day. Like there was a long time in my life that

26:30

I couldn't. You know, I worked day jobs, so I could

26:32

never do that. Yeah, I didn't think that would ever

26:35

end. And so back then I'd be like, if I can

26:37

take a nap every day, I'm successful.

26:39

Yeah, you can full on take naps

26:41

at the time. I've done that I've done it.

26:44

Yeah, the naps and also having a car

26:46

pick me up, oh.

26:48

And go to like an event or to a show

26:50

or the airport.

26:51

Okay, that's a good nap.

26:52

That's a good nap.

26:53

But that's also like a sign of success for me where

26:55

I'm just like I can take a nap in this car.

26:58

Yeah that's somebody else booked.

27:00

Totally a books car for

27:02

you or a I'm getting

27:04

picked up. There will be no time in my

27:06

life we're seeing my name or my husband's

27:09

name when we walk off the airplane and someone's holding

27:11

up a sign to be like here's your car, ma'am.

27:14

Oh yeah, yeah,

27:16

the best.

27:17

I almost want to take a picture every time, but I'm like, I'm

27:19

not going to me too, like

27:23

pretend you belong. And they're like what in the

27:25

first rodeo is going on? And

27:27

I'm way too friendly to the drivers. I'm like, how is

27:29

your weight?

27:30

Me too?

27:30

Do you don't have to carry my bag? I can carry back. I know,

27:32

stop being a hero. Here you go. Did you

27:34

wash your hands? Yuck? Yuck?

27:37

I know I do that all the time.

27:39

I'm like, no, no, I'm from Brooklyn, so I

27:41

take my own bags, you know.

27:42

They're like, okay,

27:45

oh no, you give them a dad joke.

27:47

Okay, yeah, okay, Oh

27:50

my goodness, who's saved who? Ladies

27:53

and gentlemen, non

27:55

binary royalty? Who's saved?

27:57

Who?

27:59

Dad joke?

28:00

With the drivers. I have an uncle that's a driver, and he lay

28:02

la la dad jokes. He

28:04

was driving me years ago. Somebody

28:07

jumped in front of like try to make the light in

28:09

New York and it was a green light and

28:11

he and he said, just like very

28:13

gently out the window. He's like, you never see

28:15

a car in a hospital bed. And I was

28:17

like, oh, okay,

28:21

I like that.

28:22

Yeah.

28:22

But he also said, like when I ordered her drinks,

28:25

uh, sex on the beach. She's like, you know what happens when

28:27

you have sex on the beach. I was like what, uncle, Oh,

28:30

like I.

28:30

Don't want to know. He's like, you get sand

28:32

in your ass.

28:33

I was like, I am leaving

28:36

now, not just the restaurant,

28:38

the family, just the family.

28:41

The Facebook, the family Facebook. Yeah,

28:43

I'll see you on twenty three and me bye bye.

28:50

What was your grandma's name? I love grandma names.

28:52

I do too, and this one's a good one. Thelma,

28:55

Grandma, Thelma.

28:56

Oh I

28:58

know.

28:59

And Molly, Grandma Thelma and Molly like classic

29:02

wish I wanted kids because that would be their names.

29:04

But yeah, I mean my character, my grandma's

29:07

name, which is Mavis.

29:08

Yes, I love it. She was

29:10

my person. Yeah, but Thelma,

29:12

ooh baby Thelma.

29:15

My grandma's name was Eunice beautiful.

29:18

Look, I mean that is of a

29:21

time.

29:22

That is vintage as a vintage

29:24

blend. It is.

29:26

And my great grandmother's name was Elbetha whoa

29:29

her sister, her favorite sister's name

29:32

was el Rethel. And my auntie's

29:34

name is sar Betha.

29:37

So you better write there.

29:39

What in the girl group that will never happen

29:41

is going on?

29:43

Oh my goodness, that is the SWV

29:46

of the eighteen hundred's was.

29:50

The Mississippi Delta was pumping

29:52

out some names?

29:53

Truly?

29:54

Where is my tambourine bitch? I didn't

29:57

know we were going to church? Where is Viola

29:59

Davis for the re books?

30:00

Have you ever met anyone with like in

30:02

the wild people with those names?

30:04

Hell? No, that was that

30:07

was like color purple era names.

30:09

Look not unless I ran into somebody on rum

30:11

Springer.

30:12

Yeah, doesn't

30:14

know, no, And no one's copied

30:16

them since Oh my god, yeah,

30:19

what say I am one of one?

30:20

Yes, I am the only one. I love

30:22

it.

30:23

Those are those names and they are forever.

30:25

We love them. At some time it's beautiful.

30:27

Oh wow, what in the smucker's

30:30

happy birthday is going on?

30:31

All?

30:31

Roka?

30:32

We need it?

30:32

Did I never told you that. I never told you that. I'm sorry, Michelle,

30:35

you.

30:35

Never told me. And this is the thing. I learned

30:37

something new every day. I was today, eight years old when truths

30:39

are coming out.

30:41

My dad's mom was a twin.

30:43

Wow, and they were named Cleo and Clearinore.

30:46

And I'm like, huh, how come no one took

30:48

the time.

30:50

I love Cleo same,

30:53

but what is the other one?

30:54

Clear Noor?

30:55

I've never heard that it's the same name.

30:58

Yeah, it's the longer of the

31:01

he is the actual version of the other

31:03

thing.

31:04

People were wild back then.

31:05

They were.

31:05

It's like naming your twins Mish and Michelle.

31:08

It's like, did we

31:10

not like?

31:11

Yeah, I know.

31:11

It's probably really hard back in the day to be like, oh

31:13

my god, I didn't even know I was pregnant with two.

31:17

Think of another one, So you didn't even like plan

31:20

on a name right away. No, I

31:22

get.

31:23

It, but still Clara, Clara

31:25

and Andy didn't have as

31:27

a boy or a girl, but I did.

31:28

I do love pet names because those are

31:31

like real fun. And I named my

31:33

lab mastiff Lola Fallana because she's

31:35

a big, beautiful black bitch.

31:40

I named my most recent Moses. So

31:42

that's where I'm going with that.

31:44

Wow, what in.

31:45

The First Testament?

31:47

Genesis? Exodus?

31:49

Come on, Paltrow, let's go not

31:52

religious.

31:52

I just like the name, and his name is now Mo, so it's

31:54

like not even that beautiful anymore.

31:56

Oh, it's great. Who doesn't love Moses?

31:58

Yeah?

31:59

Give it up for yeahweh.

32:00

We're doing it forty days,

32:02

forty nights.

32:03

Yeah.

32:04

And if you have another cat, you can name them like Ramgiliad

32:07

or like Nebekinezer.

32:08

Or something really deeply.

32:10

He could not wait. Yes,

32:12

fucking say that. Someone finished

32:15

college.

32:16

Unlike me, I adopted

32:18

a boy and girl lab Pitmics

32:21

and named them Bobby and Whitney.

32:22

Oh that's all. That's sweet.

32:25

So this is the part of the show. Is this the show?

32:28

It's a podcast, but it's a podcast show?

32:30

Right?

32:32

Oh my god, are we recording?

32:35

The plane's going down? Don't worry, I got

32:37

you.

32:37

Thank you.

32:38

Some days I do wake up and I do feel like Denzel Washington

32:40

at the end of every movie, I'm like, can't I bring

32:42

the train back on the tracks.

32:44

I gotta do it for my boy because

32:46

he needs a new heart.

32:47

You know what I mean? Is

32:49

that chock you?

32:51

I don't know why were you watching jog all

32:53

the Didzell movies.

32:54

He's got to land the plane and go back to Rosario

32:57

Dawson, who's his wife.

32:59

Now is the time, yes, to get

33:01

brave and do the thing.

33:03

Yeah, get braved the thing.

33:05

Yeah. And then when I got really tired, I turned to

33:07

like Sam Jackson. I'm like what

33:12

to say?

33:12

What? Because it's like, well,

33:14

no one needs it, Okay, let's go.

33:16

So we have fans,

33:19

audience members.

33:20

They asked us questions about adulting, and we try

33:22

to answer them because we're.

33:24

Experts, experts, question

33:27

mark adults, adults

33:29

in some circles, adults in

33:32

tira bang.

33:35

It's five PM. Okay, we're done.

33:39

Do you want me to go first? Yeah, you have the first question.

33:41

Okay, So here goes.

33:43

So I am twenty eight and my mom

33:45

got remarried, happy for her double exclamation

33:47

point, but she is asking me to remove

33:50

all of my belongings from her house. I

33:52

don't have space in my current living situation, but

33:54

I don't want to get rid of all my childhood

33:56

memories. Oh, how do I talk to my mom

33:59

about this? I understand she needs

34:01

to make room for the new, but I am hoping

34:03

she can help me keep a little bit of the old

34:05

until I figure out my next

34:08

steps.

34:09

Twenty eight huh wow, I

34:11

wonder how much it really is. Is it like hoarding

34:14

situation or is it just like it's like a box

34:16

of my drawings mom?

34:18

You know?

34:19

Yeah, I mean you want a

34:21

little bit little flavor of your

34:23

children around. Yeah, and twenty

34:25

eight is that's really riding the line

34:27

because it's getting Yeah, it is.

34:29

It depends on what kind of twenty eight year old.

34:31

Yeah, I heard the question, But what I'm really feeling

34:33

is you're uncomfortable with the next

34:36

phase of your mom's life and being

34:38

cut out. And

34:40

I don't know how old your mom is, but it

34:43

also is time for her to live her life.

34:46

You know, I've always wanted to be a mom,

34:48

and now that I'm a mom, I'm like, holy

34:50

shit, A lot of people

34:52

should not be parents, Like, don't no one should

34:54

be pressured into being a parent because it.

34:56

Is so much it's so

34:58

much.

34:59

Work, yeah, all the time, and

35:01

like you just fight to have your

35:03

own thoughts in peace

35:05

sometimes hence the naps and so like it

35:08

has been all about you for a long time.

35:10

Let this be all about her, right, And

35:13

don't put some more shit on your mom. You're almost

35:15

thirty. Figure your shit out, get

35:18

like a storage unit, right, sell

35:20

some of your shit. Have your mom

35:22

have her space back to make a new life, because

35:24

you know what, she ain't gonna be wet forever

35:26

and she needs to sit and spind all something while she's still

35:29

camboboo.

35:31

That is a very good point.

35:32

It does feel like that this person's maybe a little

35:34

afraid that their mom is replacing

35:37

them. Yes, yes, so

35:39

maybe the conversation is about that

35:42

and not about your things, because

35:44

your things don't matter, like your pottery

35:46

you maybe in high school, like you can it's not that

35:48

good thrown out.

35:49

Take a picture, thrown out, Take a picture and throwt

35:51

out.

35:52

Yeah yeah, and now you can start a new tradition,

35:54

like your lunch can be your thing or you

35:56

know, the gifts you give each other. But

35:58

it doesn't have to be about replacing you.

36:01

It can be exactly what you said about moving

36:03

on with her life.

36:04

But for me, the question that's not being answered is

36:06

how evil is this new husband?

36:08

Right?

36:09

And are you stopping

36:11

him, you know, from pulling off

36:14

his evil plan?

36:15

Okay, black Eyera Glass, let's

36:17

go.

36:18

No.

36:18

I just feel I just no one

36:20

has asked the question. Yeah, and I

36:22

just feel like, you know, maybe this is a

36:24

good thing. Maybe you want to keep a recording device

36:28

in the house.

36:28

Sure, shit, ask her?

36:31

Has he broached the topic of life insurance one

36:33

too many times with her?

36:34

Mm? Hm?

36:35

Oh shit?

36:36

Is this a lifetime movie? With Juda's like a

36:38

shepherd? Is she like keeping

36:40

Homer?

36:41

Does she need a camera in the living room to see

36:43

what's going on? Okay?

36:45

Like, the thing is too I hate to say it.

36:47

It's your mama's business, it ain't yours,

36:50

right, Yeah, Like, how many times have we told.

36:52

Our mom to butt out?

36:54

Do you know what I mean? So?

36:55

Like, but we're right, we're right though,

36:58

you know what I mean?

36:59

That's true, Like you had to figure

37:01

it out, We had to figure it out.

37:03

She got to figure it out. Yeah, truly, that's

37:05

all I'm saying.

37:06

Yeah, I mean that sucks, especially if you're

37:08

like super super close, but like bigger

37:10

picture, it's tough.

37:11

Okay, wow, we really answered that.

37:13

You guys, welcome to the.

37:15

View all the levels answer

37:19

next question, Oh my god, this is like

37:21

a mom. This is like a very mom heavy

37:23

go for it. Okay, my single mom

37:25

flirts with my guy friends. How do I get her

37:27

to stop? It's so embarrassing.

37:29

Oh yeah,

37:32

I'm just thinking about Amy Poehler in Oh

37:35

my God, what's that movie?

37:36

Oh and Mean Girls.

37:37

Mean Girls.

37:38

Yeah, yes, she's like I'm

37:40

cool.

37:41

Yeah, I have the Cloe mop. I mean maybe she is. Maybe

37:43

she's the hot mom and the friends are like, cool, great,

37:45

we love it, you know what I mean.

37:47

Yeah, that can be embarrassing so many ways.

37:50

I mean I didn't suffer from that, but I

37:52

do remember the really the hot

37:54

mom, and it was just like.

37:55

I'm missus Turkles.

37:57

You're just like, you know, you're

37:59

just one of these feelings in my bood.

38:02

Like that is how there he is?

38:04

You know what.

38:04

I will never be the hot mom.

38:06

I'll be the mom that teaches you how to use the tampon

38:09

or a cup or whatever the fuck we're using.

38:11

Yeah, but yeah, it.

38:12

Was Texas in the early eighties,

38:15

like the hair, yeah, like

38:17

Dallas.

38:17

Yeah, I was like, oh good, Kyle

38:20

Idel's mom.

38:21

You know, like every pool party was like

38:24

nails and iced tea and cigarettes,

38:26

big curls and plastic surgery

38:28

and you're.

38:29

Like, oh my god, that's

38:31

it. And tanning beds, probably

38:33

tanning beds.

38:34

Before tanning beds. Oh god,

38:36

wait.

38:37

A minute, can I ask Georgia?

38:39

Was there a hot dad?

38:40

No, hot

38:44

brother? Yes? Yes, yes,

38:46

you know yeah, the older brother, the older

38:48

brother of a friend would be that, and

38:51

they would just want us to leave them alone,

38:53

you know. Yeah, but I would say that my mom

38:55

does, like, can only talk to dudes

38:57

in a way.

38:58

That's like flirtatious.

38:59

Yeah, the waiter, the fuck it, you

39:01

know, whatever it is, there's a flirtation, is

39:04

your dad Okay, No, they're divorced.

39:06

No, uh, they are divorced.

39:09

So no, it.

39:09

Didn't That didn't go over well, and

39:12

it's creepy when you're young. But

39:14

again, you can't do anything about it. She's

39:16

her own woman, right, that's true.

39:19

Yeah, just don't bring your friends around her.

39:21

I guess I think telling her

39:23

after she does it. Yeah, like if she does

39:25

it and you're like, mom, when you do

39:27

that. It makes me uncomfortable totally. It really makes

39:29

me uncomfortable, and I like it if you didn't

39:32

do it, at least in my presence. You

39:34

know, that is the creating

39:36

of a boundary, right, mm hmmm. It's

39:38

like when I'm around, this is what it's going to be.

39:40

Mm hmm.

39:41

And I've let you do it, and now

39:44

you've hit a point and that's it. Yeah,

39:46

I feel like you're within your your rights to do

39:48

that.

39:48

And bringing up specific things too or

39:51

is important, Like when you said this, that was flirtation,

39:53

Like sometimes people don't know that they're being flirty,

39:55

you know what I mean. Yeah, yeah, like this thing that

39:57

you said. Or you touch his arm and

40:00

that was creepy.

40:01

Oh yeah, the arm touch.

40:03

The unnecessary arm touch.

40:04

Yeah, necessary arm touch.

40:05

I don't know a lot of rich people, but I went to like a

40:08

comedian's wedding in South Pasadena, California.

40:11

It was giving eyes white shut but like at a barbecue,

40:14

and I had never.

40:15

Been around the rich white people before. Everyone

40:18

was named Taylor. Oh and

40:21

just like but but bangs.

40:22

I've never seen so many people with face responsibility.

40:25

And my

40:27

husband and I were like just married and this is like the

40:29

first time I saw like really rich people

40:32

just all kiss each other on the mouth.

40:35

Oh you uh, now do

40:37

they do that? What are you talking about?

40:39

Do you know?

40:39

Like Jane Seymour in wedding

40:42

crashers, like oh oh yes, like

40:44

the mom who's like, oh my god, I love this tie

40:46

and it's like what And so

40:49

none of that was to me.

40:50

But like I remember, I brought my husband.

40:52

We were married for like six months, We're still paid

40:54

for the wedding, and yeah, women were like kissing

40:57

him hello on his lips and like we're

40:59

like on his cheek, like in the corner, like right

41:01

near his lips. And I was like, wow,

41:03

what the fuck is this? And my friend was like this

41:05

is how rich people do. And I'm like what holy

41:09

shit? Yeah, oh that would creep me out on so

41:11

much. Like even when a like a dude friend kisses

41:13

me on the cheek, it's so I'm

41:15

not okay with it. It's so inappropriate to me,

41:17

like do an air kiss. But I don't want your fucking

41:20

mouth on my face.

41:21

Ew you know what I mean When.

41:23

You put it that way, absolutely get your mouth

41:25

off my face.

41:26

Yeah.

41:27

The title of this episode.

41:28

Can I tell you in Holland,

41:31

where my husband's from. They kiss on the cheek

41:33

three times. Wow, oh

41:36

my god.

41:37

Yeah.

41:37

So like when you walk into a party like

41:39

it's just never ending, and I'm like, wow,

41:41

can we end them?

41:42

No? No, lah.

41:44

And the first time I didn't know, and I was pulling away

41:46

and they were like and I was like, this is too

41:48

much.

41:49

My family we do close

41:52

cheek air kiss, so you get them lot

41:54

in your ear essentially, but your faces

41:56

don't touch. It's very like hygienic,

41:59

but but also

42:01

withholding, you know what I mean. It's that perfect

42:03

amount of like weirdness with

42:06

comfort.

42:07

Yeah.

42:07

I didn't mind before, but now

42:09

I really mind because now I don't really know what

42:11

people are doing with their mouth.

42:13

Yeah. Post COVID's that's over. It's

42:16

disgusting. Yeah.

42:17

The first time I smelled bad breath out

42:20

of COVID, I was like, no, oh, this

42:22

is how I get COVID, And I don't miss this

42:24

at all.

42:25

That's that's gone.

42:26

Blowing out candles on a cake that should

42:28

be gone completely.

42:30

Yeah, has it been bad, like a green

42:32

flame shoots out of somebody's mouth.

42:34

No, I just feel like you're blowing your germs. Look,

42:37

I have a little bit of OCD. Okay, okay, it

42:39

might be me a little bit gotcha, No, I love

42:41

this.

42:42

It might be me and not COVID.

42:44

Let's talk about it.

42:45

Because there's a lot of people that don't take their

42:47

shoes off when they come in my house, and I'm just like, oh,

42:50

do you mind? And then like one person

42:52

was like I don't really do it.

42:53

I'm like okay, And then they

42:55

got dog shit that wasn't from my dog

42:57

on my carpet, and I was like, this.

43:00

Is why you take your fucking hoes

43:02

off?

43:03

My god, Like, that's how plagues start. Literally,

43:06

that's like, so I

43:08

have such an issue with that.

43:10

That's how the bubonic play started. Yes,

43:12

people didn't take off their clogs?

43:13

Is that what it was? You come

43:16

into this house, you take off your clogs.

43:18

I feel like, yes, okay, totally

43:20

take your shoes off.

43:21

Totally take your shoes off.

43:23

Sometimes though, uh people

43:26

people's feet smells like that

43:28

kind of like tang, and it's like

43:30

that's what they're scared that they're putting into the atmosphere

43:33

and just putting out there.

43:34

I have to say, I.

43:34

Will gladly take my shoes off. I have great smelling

43:36

feet. Connect.

43:38

I don't find I don't mind other people

43:40

leaving their shoes on when they come over.

43:42

Like, I'm just not gonna people do that.

43:43

But if you're going to, then like, have a pair of socks

43:45

for people available, because I don't do bear.

43:48

Feet on the floor. That grosses me out.

43:50

Yeah right, and I don't want people staring at my grosser

43:52

feet, you know, yeah, actually really

43:55

cute feet, but they're not.

43:56

They don't need to prove it. Wiki feet come

43:59

through, do it?

43:59

Wiki?

44:00

I have a wiki.

44:02

You must have a wiki fee.

44:03

I didn't start it, but there is a wiki feed.

44:06

Yeah.

44:06

Socks, I have guest socks and I

44:08

have guest slippers. Wow.

44:10

And here's something that skives me out

44:12

too, And then I have to get to the next question. But this really skies

44:14

me out. Okay, and let me know if I'm alone

44:17

eating in an airport restaurant

44:19

and using the fork, oh,

44:22

because I'm like, have they really cleaned

44:24

this? How many people have gone through this fork?

44:26

Absolutely?

44:27

No? Ooh That's why I'm not mad at like a plastic

44:29

fork.

44:29

Sorry.

44:30

I want to save the earth too, but I also want to save

44:32

my face.

44:32

Yeah, you know what, I won't do.

44:34

I won't drink out of a cup or

44:36

like a glass in a hotel room. Never,

44:39

they wipe it with the same towel that they use

44:42

on the counters I've seen twenty twenty.

44:44

Yeah.

44:44

Never, don't put your mouth on

44:47

anything in a hotel truly.

44:50

Okay, we just don't do

44:52

it. Worse to live by.

44:54

Look, that's the name of this episode. Good, Okay,

44:57

next question?

44:58

Okay, yes, ooh, this

45:00

is a saucy santana question.

45:02

Oh my god, I don't

45:04

even know how to Here we go.

45:06

Okay,

45:09

it's problematic because I'm looking at it too.

45:11

Oh. No, do you want to do it together?

45:13

No?

45:13

I don't gather. I don't want together.

45:14

No, I don't want to stay together and I don't want to do it together.

45:16

Let me just do it,

45:19

okay, ass play? Oh,

45:21

I want to get into it, but I don't know where to start.

45:24

How do I begin? Like, first of all, the fact

45:26

that Jordan wanted to do that question with me troubles

45:28

me.

45:29

Together as friends, know you

45:32

as your friend in this journey of ass play,

45:34

that's what I do. As middle child, I am

45:37

solving everything and I'm here for you, Oh

45:39

my god.

45:40

And now the party can begin because I'm here so

45:42

supportive.

45:43

Yay, my god,

45:46

I just got so thirsty. I just got

45:49

so thirsty. Where's my yettie?

45:51

I need my water? I am parched.

45:55

Listen, I say nobody asked, but

45:58

I'll start. Yes, I

46:01

would go to a store and ask somebody

46:03

that you sort of trust there, like what

46:06

are the good things to start with if

46:09

you don't know? Because if you don't know, you don't want to

46:11

start at like a very difficult

46:13

course.

46:14

If you need something a little bit more intermediate. Do you know

46:16

what I mean?

46:17

Yeah, you don't want to go on hot essentially,

46:19

you want to go in warm this

46:22

I'm blushing right now. I'm the wrong person to ask

46:24

us because I just pretend that that part of my body doesn't

46:27

exist.

46:27

And in love.

46:30

I love that we were just like I don't like my feet

46:32

to touch the floor. Let's

46:34

get a asplay because I'm sweeping

46:37

the floor.

46:38

Listen, there's something for everyone.

46:41

But I would say do that go to

46:44

us?

46:44

Yes, once Jordan calms down,

46:47

I'd say go to a store. Also,

46:49

like, watch some porn,

46:53

do some research, you know, see what

46:55

you might be into. Talk about

46:57

it with your partner first. Yeah, because

46:59

that's was on the menu. That's something you should talk

47:01

about before ordering.

47:03

For sure. I think being curious

47:05

together is a good one.

47:07

Yes, for this person's like I want to bring

47:09

out all my stuff and it's like no, I want, I'm

47:11

curious about it. And it's like kind of a fun

47:13

relationship thing to do. Is like,

47:16

yeah, the porn thing is a great idea, Like let's watch

47:18

and see what happens when people do

47:20

that.

47:20

Yes, yeah, right, And I think exploring,

47:23

like to what degree do you want to

47:25

be penetrated? To what degree do you want to penetrate

47:27

somebody else likeing and what their

47:29

comfort levels are.

47:30

I love that he goes somebody else, you

47:33

know, like.

47:38

I had no idea. I didn't

47:40

know.

47:40

Oh my god, I feel and

47:43

hear.

47:43

The roller coaster of emotions

47:46

that is going on between those two moving

47:48

blankets.

47:52

I surprise. Penetration is not good for anyone.

47:55

Look, not

47:57

even if you yell like happy Kwanza.

47:59

It's never fun anyway.

48:02

I'll care you disrespect.

48:05

December twenty six, Like

48:07

done, coots, chuck away up?

48:08

All right?

48:09

Oh my god, I feel like it's

48:11

a conversation. Okay,

48:14

I'm just saying like.

48:14

It's a conversation that yeah, of course, like you

48:16

should know those things about each other, right,

48:19

Yeah, and if anything starts

48:22

small.

48:22

With beads, there you go.

48:24

Absolutely.

48:25

Next question, Jordan, call

48:27

it what's your name? Where you calling from?

48:30

Okay, my husband says

48:32

a little bit, excuse.

48:32

Me, Okay, let's take your breath. She

48:35

put her arms up.

48:37

Let's just the way the way this

48:39

is written is very conversational. My husband,

48:42

let's say, region doesn't smell

48:44

great. Oh maybe

48:46

it's his body wash that

48:48

leaves a scent that makes

48:50

me feel like gagging.

48:52

How do I approach this topic?

48:54

You've gotten this far in your life and relationship

48:57

with them, and they don't know that, Like they're

48:59

not like my neighbor friend or my husband.

49:01

Yeah, you got to open up lines of communication

49:04

truly.

49:05

Yeah, you got to talk about it because you know what, I bet

49:07

your husband would have no problem telling.

49:09

You, right, you know what I mean.

49:11

So I'm just like, what is it? Does

49:13

he need to use a different soap, eat something

49:15

different? Is his pH balance off?

49:17

Like? Well, the typical answer would

49:19

be why don't you try showering or taking

49:22

it back together?

49:23

But really it's like you don't need a tiptoe?

49:26

No, does your husband is your life

49:28

partner, like getting married, Like your

49:30

partner's crotch is like your roommate,

49:32

Like like I.

49:35

See that thing more than like my parents. Like

49:37

for sure, you could pick it out of a lineup.

49:39

Yeah, so it matters,

49:41

It matters. Yeah, come on, don't be a

49:43

fucking hero. Don't do that to yourself. Totally

49:46

save yourself. I'm gonna ask another question, because

49:48

we cannot end on someone's crotch, can't

49:50

end on someone's end, and you can't end on someone's

49:53

crotch.

49:54

You know what I mean?

49:54

Yeah, I do.

49:55

Okay, here's the last question, and

49:58

Georgia, you're walking into a okay, thank

50:02

you. How do I go about investing?

50:05

I've been living paycheck to paycheck for most of

50:07

my adulthood, and now that I'm at a new company

50:09

with a decent salary, I'm looking

50:11

to maintain some financial security.

50:14

It's an intimidating hurdle, and I don't

50:16

know where to start.

50:17

I love that.

50:18

Yeah, that is so important. It

50:20

is, and I totally understand that. One.

50:22

I'll say, high yield savings accounts are a really

50:25

good place to start.

50:26

Yeah, right now?

50:27

Was that high yield savings accounts? Huh?

50:29

So there's savings accounts like at your bank or

50:31

whatever, and those give you like a cheeny tiny

50:33

percentage.

50:34

You'll not make any money off of that.

50:36

While you're waiting to figure it out and

50:38

learning, Go google a high yield savings account

50:40

in a safe banking institution and put

50:42

your money in there while you wait, and

50:45

listen to a bunch of podcasts about finances.

50:47

Right, yeah, yeah, the compound and interest right

50:49

now, some of the highest right now are like covering

50:52

it about four to five percent.

50:54

Now.

50:54

Back in the day, I used to do that with my own money, and

50:56

it was like when I first started in comedy. And then

50:59

interest rates of course went down with the

51:01

recession and COVID and

51:03

all that. But now it's a good time

51:05

to do it. Now it's a saving time and banks

51:07

are begging for people's money

51:10

and they're savings savings account not not the

51:12

commercial banks but banks like

51:14

Ally and things like that.

51:16

So you are so on the money. Amen

51:18

to that, Georgia, like, yeah, do that shit.

51:21

And there's so many pots. That's how I learned.

51:23

I don't know ton, but I know some basics,

51:25

and it's all from podcasts like financial

51:28

podcasts out there. Oh that's such

51:30

a good piece of advice. Find the people you like, find

51:32

the topics you like, and learn,

51:35

but go slow. Yeah, yeah,

51:37

that's what I was just gonna say. The emotional part

51:39

of it is like it is huge.

51:41

It's like waking up one day and just saying, I

51:43

have to lose weight, right,

51:46

And it feels overwhelming and daunting

51:48

because you think you're just supposed to like drop

51:50

this weight and be super healthy within like

51:52

weeks. But it takes time. And so if

51:54

you're overwhelmed by this, they use the

51:56

word hurdle. Just one day at

51:58

a time.

51:59

Truly, you got this?

52:01

Yeah you got this? Yeah?

52:02

Oh my goodness, Well I'm so glad we ended on an

52:05

adult question, not

52:07

about someone's stinky.

52:09

Dick funky spunk. We ask

52:11

all our guests, what is.

52:15

What is the most adult thing you want to do

52:17

for yourself that you haven't had a chance to do yet?

52:19

And it could be big or small or

52:21

medium.

52:22

Let me think I have

52:24

completely lost the plot

52:26

when it comes to being in shape in a way

52:28

that like makes me feel old, you

52:31

know what I mean, Like I'm forty three. I

52:33

think that's not old at all. No,

52:35

but somehow I'm like, well that time's over for me

52:38

taking care of myself in that way, I

52:41

know, and I need, Yeah, I need to remember

52:43

like people run marathons in their sixties

52:46

and yeah, you know, And

52:48

I just need to get that in my head because I'm such a like,

52:50

I'm such a napper that I'm like, well, I'm gonna

52:52

go take a nap.

52:53

No, I need to like discipline myself.

52:55

And I talked about this in therapy all the time, where it's like,

52:57

if you didn't have a lot of discipline as a child, you don't know

52:59

how to do it to yourself as an adult.

53:01

Yeah, but you have to be you have to parent yourself

53:03

and.

53:03

Be like, Okay, George, I know you want a nap right now, but

53:05

a thirty minute walk is going to make you feel

53:07

better in so many ways. Yeah,

53:10

you know what really worked for me, and I

53:12

don't know if it will work for you, but making

53:15

plans with my friends to go for a walk

53:17

or a jog or like a dance class or like

53:20

whatever kind of because I was like, I'm

53:22

not gonna let my friend down right, I'll cancel

53:24

all day long. I have a palatine at home.

53:26

Are you kidding me? It's just oh, my god. Yeah,

53:28

like I'm hanging shit on it at this point of

53:30

course.

53:31

But if I had a friend meet me at my bike every

53:33

day, I'd be like, I'm coming because I don't want to let

53:35

those motherfuckers down totally, right,

53:37

So I don't know, maybe that would work.

53:39

And then also I bought like new workout

53:41

clothes at Target.

53:42

That's a good one, right because I'm just like this shit

53:44

looks like I'm mad at myself. Yeah,

53:46

and so I just got like a new

53:49

black one, you know what I mean.

53:50

That's a really great point because the pants, the stretch pants I

53:52

have, I love them, but the elastic

53:55

is gone.

53:56

Yep, yep, they fall off.

53:57

Well, I you know, work out to like have cute

54:00

new outfit to like work out in is everything

54:03

for sure.

54:03

Yeah, especially like in California. Everyone

54:05

loves to hike. Yes, oh

54:08

my god, bring some juices, go on a hike,

54:10

do the little hot goss.

54:11

That's a good one. Spill the tea. I haven't done

54:13

that in years. It's a great idea.

54:15

If I was there, I would do it with you. I would love

54:17

that.

54:18

What's one kind of exercise routine you've never

54:20

really done before, but like wanted to try.

54:23

Oh, there is an

54:25

aerial.

54:27

Gymnastic place by my

54:29

house, but I think it's a way for children.

54:31

Oh wow, that is so cool, but

54:34

I'm determined that. Oh my gosh,

54:36

that's cool.

54:37

It's giving Steve Corral realness. I

54:39

want it.

54:40

Yeah, there is a pole dancing studio

54:42

that I've never done. That I can't imagine. I

54:44

could barely do a push up. I can't imagine I can do that,

54:46

but it's a no for me. I'm

54:49

just too top heavy. That's like one of my

54:51

heros.

54:52

That's the same the fact that I can tie my own

54:54

shoelace on camera and not always go like,

54:58

give me an.

54:58

Oscar, Michelle, what's up?

55:00

I could see you, like with Tanning

55:02

Chatum whatever his name is.

55:04

Yes, his name is Channing, but

55:06

that's hilarious. Tanning, Tanning,

55:08

Chadumann. I don't really

55:11

watch a lot of his films, but I could see you

55:13

doing a little something in the n

55:15

Z.

55:16

Yeah, yeah, what are we talking

55:18

about.

55:19

I could see it for her in a film. I could see that for you

55:22

for sure. Something I'm just saying.

55:24

I'm just saying, if that, if that is what you wish

55:26

her one.

55:26

I think you should try nobody said

55:29

that. Nobody, Like literally, you said it and no

55:31

one said it. I was talking about hiking.

55:33

I can see it.

55:34

Well, stop seeing it. That's on you

55:37

talk about pole hiking.

55:39

Is pole hiking the new trend in LA.

55:42

That's what old people do. Oh, you're right,

55:44

that's just a walker with a walking stick.

55:46

Oh.

55:47

I thought you guys were talking about like strip

55:49

poll and hiking

55:51

at the same time.

55:52

I was, she was, she was.

55:54

But then there's like an actual poll that you take

55:56

hiking. Oh

55:58

my goodness, this has been amazing. It

56:01

was so fun hanging out with you. Thank you so much for

56:03

doing this silly little show. Thank

56:06

you guys so much. I adore you both.

56:08

I love the show.

56:09

Oh, thank you so much. Thank

56:11

you, Georgia.

56:12

Thanks you guys.

56:19

Wow, we learned a lot, yeah

56:22

about each other.

56:23

About people's holes, their wishes, their wants,

56:25

questions, answers, more questions than answers.

56:28

More questions than answers.

56:29

You have more questions and answers. This is what people

56:31

have.

56:32

Yeah.

56:32

I think the world would be a better

56:35

place if we asked more questions, like

56:38

what I mean, whether it comes to like federal

56:40

funding or like who's running for what? Or

56:42

like you know, civil rights, like fucking

56:45

anything, like even like your body and

56:47

like expectations, what

56:50

your mom is doing or not like fucking

56:52

anything to be honest.

56:53

Yeah, thank you.

56:55

Oh my goodness, my loveliest

56:57

istant, Abbie just gave me a seltzer.

56:59

Oh oh yeah, that's refreshing.

57:05

Abby.

57:07

Did you just wish for that and she brought it? Or did

57:09

you text her? Or like what happened?

57:10

I texted her because I am I'm

57:12

not lying. I got really thirsty when I read

57:14

the ask play question.

57:16

I understsdand do you I

57:18

get it? You some someone

57:20

I'm trying to imagine. No, come on now,

57:23

Michelle, stay.

57:25

With us, Michelle.

57:27

Michelle has been locked in a battle with this

57:29

microphone for the entirety of

57:31

the flycast recorded.

57:33

No, Michelle, no.

57:35

Microphone is like that white kid and Lord of the

57:37

Flies. Shut the fuck up and

57:39

sit down. Oh my god.

57:43

For the record, all the kids in Order the Flies were

57:45

white. But that's trying to

57:47

enter my mouth. No

57:50

microphone. No, maybe

57:53

get a sandbag.

57:54

I don't know. I'm just trying to help a sandbag.

57:57

What did you call me?

57:58

I just

58:01

want one normal interaction.

58:06

What do you so us?

58:08

Forget it? Forget it. That was so

58:11

fun. Georgia was so cool,

58:13

so cool. I love anybody that can conduct

58:15

an interview whilst also like with

58:18

a pet, love it because I can't.

58:20

I can't do it with my dog. I can't do that.

58:21

I can.

58:22

Yeah, you have cool dogs, You have very cool dogs.

58:24

My dog is a little more high energy, you know,

58:27

is he?

58:27

He always hies?

58:28

I wouldn't know. Well, he's scared.

58:30

I mean they they say that the owner's

58:33

energy vibrates through the dog,

58:35

so that's probably he gets it from me unfortunately.

58:38

But you know, it is

58:40

what it is. It is what it is, Okay.

58:42

I don't know how this got sad so

58:45

much for listening? Holy shit, God,

58:49

Like.

58:49

Can you is this? Is this?

58:51

This is really you?

58:52

Right?

58:52

I mean I've known you for so long.

58:53

I'm like, this really isn't how

58:55

you possibly think of yourself?

58:57

Is it?

58:57

I think?

58:58

Thank you so much?

58:59

What are you getting now?

59:00

I got a roll of toilet paper because I can't find

59:02

my tissues.

59:06

So aby just going on a worldwide scavenger.

59:13

By Cherry Seltzer give

59:16

me a whole seger girl.

59:18

Sorry everyone, I love it.

59:20

All right, listen, it's about

59:22

that time too. You gotta get your kids. So it

59:24

is.

59:25

Yeah, you know, great, good talk man, see

59:27

you later, Okay, bye?

59:29

What like?

59:32

I love the show, but I think I'm done. I think it's

59:34

done.

59:41

This has been an exactly right production.

59:42

Our senior producer is g Howley.

59:45

Art Associate producer is Christina Chamberlain.

59:47

This episode was mixed by John Bradley.

59:49

Our guest booker is Patrick Cotner.

59:51

Additional production support from Hannah Kyle

59:53

Crichton.

59:54

Theme song and live show DJing is by DJ

59:56

don Will.

59:57

Artwork by Jamie.

59:58

Bechtel, Photography by Vander

1:00:00

Moss.

1:00:01

Executive produced by Karen Kilgera, Georgia

1:00:03

Hartstar and Danielle Kramer.

1:00:05

Follow the show on Instagram at Adulting

1:00:07

the Pod.

1:00:08

Email your questions to Adulting Questions

1:00:10

at gmail dot com.

1:00:11

Mmmm