A Minnesota home cooked meal...

A Minnesota home cooked meal...

Released Tuesday, 26th November 2019
 1 person rated this episode
A Minnesota home cooked meal...

A Minnesota home cooked meal...

A Minnesota home cooked meal...

A Minnesota home cooked meal...

Tuesday, 26th November 2019
 1 person rated this episode
Rate Episode

Episode Transcript

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0:01

Welcome back another episode. I can

0:04

be there, so I'm your host. Kevin policy that

0:07

Joey No, I don't think you too. Let

0:09

me check Joey. Yes, I'm here, Joey yes,

0:11

Joey yes here, but I digress. Let's

0:14

mean our chemist shower in no particular orders.

0:16

Say hello to Craig Kowski. Kakoo. What's

0:18

that smell? It smells like

0:20

rotten eggs, which means a gas leak. Duck.

0:24

Here comes chriss Avorado, Hey Alvarado.

0:27

When was your last dental exam?

0:30

Um?

0:33

Well, I go often, to be honest often,

0:35

Yeah, I

0:37

mean I go a lot, A couple of times a year,

0:39

a few times a year. How's

0:42

that for an answer? It's perfect. You don't need to go that

0:44

often. Well, I

0:47

do open up about it. You know. I'm a whitening

0:49

ye stuff, and I have a good relationship with

0:52

my dentist. I don't do zoom, I do his brand and stuff.

0:54

And actually this guy texts this morning from my dentist saying,

0:56

hey, man, where you at ka

1:00

relationship? I asked the right person

1:02

beat the drumm. It's James Heeny Carl

1:04

June Heeney. Do you accept Joey

1:06

Jesus Greer as your Lord and savior. I

1:09

absolutely do the pillows, but that's a

1:11

regular deserbaniche. All those your

1:13

real teeth. Unfortunately

1:17

I don't have the same, very

1:22

interested. Just

1:25

stresses me out. And last,

1:27

we check your conscience at the door. If you think him least,

1:30

it's Joey Greer, Joey the joy Killer.

1:32

Can you in fact turn water into urine?

1:35

Thank you gotta drink. At first, we'd

1:38

like to invite all of you to become v i P members of our new

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1:42

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is also something only available to Patreon

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members. All kinds of cool

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ship. Please join our super Court

2:03

fans by going to patreon dot com

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slash alchemy. That's that's patreon

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dot com slash alchemy this and

2:11

thank you. All of today's scene

2:13

suggestions or gather from our listeners emails if you'd

2:15

like to submit yours, and we would love if

2:17

you did. I go through them myself, and

2:19

I appreciate your efforts. Please write

2:21

to the podcast at your name here at alchemy

2:24

this dot com. That's your name here at

2:26

alchemy this dot com. My first

2:28

scene, in fact, comes in Jeremy, who wrote, y'all

2:30

are great. Here's a scenario.

2:33

It's the dead of Minnesota winner and

2:36

a hardy Minnesota mom has some guests

2:38

visiting from the warm South. She

2:40

drags her guests at local Target to gather

2:43

all the ingredients for her secret family

2:45

hot dish recipe and her iconic

2:48

Snickers salad. You serve it

2:50

alongside dinner. It's not a dessert, but

2:52

yes it's full of Snickers. Maybe

2:56

there's a blizzarder of par outage. I don't

2:58

know. Keep the good ship coming, German.

3:02

Okay, okay, okay,

3:04

Hey, you're gonna have to say hi to the whole group. This is

3:06

the whole group Target.

3:10

This is Benny. He works at Target. Benny.

3:13

They got greeters now over

3:15

from Gainesville, Florida. Benny, nice to meet

3:17

you. Maybe I brought him

3:19

here because we're making this ste Oh yeah, yeah,

3:21

we're going to make the Snickers pie

3:23

to salad.

3:26

Sorry, I am also making a Snickers

3:28

pie for alright, Hey baby, why

3:30

don't you look at us in the eyes? Yeah, welcome

3:33

up here. What kind of greeting

3:35

is this? Benny's not really

3:38

in a Target employee? Is this what?

3:41

It's fine? It's a Minnesota

3:43

thing. Just like my bumper sticker said, Now

3:45

follow me and we're all going to

3:47

divide them conquer. I want to give you each a piece

3:50

of the list. Here you go, and you

3:52

do this right, and you know what's waiting on the other side

3:54

of the rainbow. You handed us

3:56

all papers to say Snickers. Well, that's

3:58

right, some sort Gainesville scavenger

4:01

hunt. We're not in Gainesville, honey, We're

4:03

in Minnesota. Really strange. Hey,

4:06

hey, you big? What's going on? Oh? Hey, Bill,

4:08

who do we got here? We got some friends in town.

4:10

This is my cousin and his family. Oh

4:13

boy, it's mighty cold here,

4:15

man, What the hell? Well, it's

4:17

it's not too bad. It's about minus

4:19

ten right now. Yeah. They got thin skin,

4:22

Bill, they got thin skin where

4:24

it'll thicken up while you're here. It's never

4:27

been bid by gator. Makes you have pretty

4:30

thick skin? Yeah? Oh no, no, I've

4:32

never left Minnesota. Oh what

4:34

do you do here. I'm I'm a pharmacist.

4:37

Oh really, you're the fellow we come to for

4:39

drugs. Well, they've

4:41

got to be letting this happen. They've got to be

4:44

in illegal fashion. Of course.

4:47

Are you making fun of him? Not

4:49

at all. I haven't seen you in ten years. Now

4:51

you come in and slt my target.

4:55

Let's go find Margot. Margot,

4:57

Margot, wake up, Margot, Margot.

5:01

Margo, Hey, listen to me. Okay,

5:03

there's a storm coming in here. We're gonna have to lock

5:05

this target down, all right. No one's

5:08

getting in or out. This thing is going to be blown over for a

5:10

couple of days in the store room.

5:12

Yeah, Margo, Yeah you were. We

5:16

should have woken me up. You're tired.

5:19

I've been out twelve fourteen hours.

5:22

Jim, you got to wake me up. Jim.

5:25

My kids are at home. Brought

5:29

him over there. Come

5:31

on, you haven't been home. Oh it's

5:33

because mommy fell asleep again again.

5:36

But Jim saved me. Hey,

5:38

Minnesota, I'm alright, Okay, Well, this storm's

5:40

coming and I'm there's no one I'd rather hunker

5:42

down with, So I gotta lock it down, all right. And I

5:44

think the best thing we can do is sleep

5:47

in my eyes. You shouldn't tell the customers. That's just

5:49

my gut. But you tell me. I am

5:51

a manager. I

5:54

go with you. I defer to you. I just woke up.

5:56

All right, I'm gonna go secretly lock the doors.

5:59

What the hell's this bag chair? What

6:01

did they sell here in Minnesota?

6:04

Okay, Leon, you need to cool it a bit. You're

6:06

insulting everything in this damn target.

6:09

And I love this target, seventy one

6:11

for a bean bag. Cheer Lean, I haven't

6:13

seen you in ten years. Okay,

6:16

right now you're coming. You're staying with me, You're

6:18

accepting my hospitality. You gotta change

6:20

your attitude. Why do you keep making a big deal about

6:22

how long it's been? What? Well, because

6:24

this is odd that you'd be so per

6:27

s nikety when I've opened my home to

6:29

you. All right, Pepperonis

6:31

sleeve tasting Pepperonis.

6:34

I'll take three. This is just a little packet, Just taste

6:36

that. What else? I had to try some

6:38

Pepperoni's sleeve paper? Are you too good

6:41

for it? Why am not a big fan?

6:46

You know what? What's in that

6:48

Pepperoni? Well? We have three from flavors.

6:50

I got cheered question now

6:53

is he ain't gonna stop talking and

6:56

suns him. I don't

6:58

have to keep talking. I don't thank you very very you

7:00

can keep talking. No, thank you, peg,

7:02

I don't. I don't you know, out of respect. If you know, I'm

7:04

I'm a new keep going. Remember you

7:08

want me to be amat. What's

7:10

trying with this kid? Hey? Hey, Leon, one

7:12

of your kids is an asshole. I got a name,

7:15

which what is it? I don't know it eyeball? Eyeball

7:18

because of the big eyeball you got tattooed on your head.

7:20

Maybe eyeball graduated

7:22

number one in his class? So what kind of class

7:24

was it? How many kids? That's

7:27

what I thought? Yeah, that

7:30

makes you very smart, daddy.

7:33

Why don't you tell her why we're even here anyway?

7:36

It hasn't been ten ten years for no goddamn

7:38

reason. We don't want to see you. We're

7:40

on the run, all right, daddy. I'm just gonna tell her don't

7:43

do this. Hey, they're

7:45

big funny running into you

7:47

again. It is funny, isn't

7:49

it. I thought it was on my way out,

7:51

but they locked the front door. So yeah,

7:54

well, I guess this whole targets on the lockdown.

7:57

They don't lock the door, lock down? What the hell

7:59

it? Don't worry about it. I got

8:01

this. Hey, Jim, are you, um

8:04

you know seeing anybody? Well,

8:06

you know since since Molly passed,

8:09

God rest, it's it's been

8:12

five years now and it's been a long

8:14

time. It's a long time. A lot of snack,

8:17

you know. Well, I never say no

8:19

toyst snickers, Uncle daddy,

8:22

eyeball. You need to find some guns in here. Yeah,

8:24

this seems pretty strange. I

8:27

think that's lockdowns to get up. I think it's

8:29

the gate. They ain't gonna

8:31

get

8:31

up. And

8:35

I brought a couple. Do any of you work here? No

8:40

holo shirts? That's my bad.

8:42

Bade a target. She's

8:45

got a point, But we could probably help you. What doors

8:47

are locked, don't? I mean, we know the doors

8:50

are locked. The doors are locked

8:52

for long. And I think my cart

8:54

wheel app isn't working. Wheel.

8:57

What's an app? It's the savings program you

8:59

use a target, it's are we all out what happens

9:01

on it? Well, it's how you get your coupons, that's how you

9:03

redeem your coupons, and it's not working. Can one of you

9:05

figure this out for me? Sure? We

9:07

can figure it out about put her atoms

9:09

in your bag. You'll walk out with him, all right, Thank

9:11

you very much. Man, you get a complete discount.

9:14

It's got more boxing than done stocking. You know, you

9:16

know I heard it's going on with this whole locknow thing. What's

9:18

you going there with the big talk the whole thing again?

9:21

You know what I said? What's what's going on down with the

9:24

lucknown fidget

9:26

any right? No, no, no, I'm this is

9:28

the this is the normal. You know, I'm just

9:31

a little nerves. It's a big storm. Man. You're

9:33

pouncing all over the place. Your drink

9:36

dang sugar free red ball

9:38

you want to drink? No, no, no, no,

9:43

and then you all jacked up. Yeah, he's old, jacked

9:45

up, whole crazy, sugar free, a whole

9:47

crazy. And don't

9:50

you know that I thought that if I was sugar free,

9:52

I wouldn't get it. I wouldn't get there,

9:54

you know, I wouldn't get too fidgety. But the

9:56

sugar free still hit behind, has nothing to do. The sugar

9:59

free has everything to do the tour, rain and everything else. My

10:01

mistake, my mistake, but my

10:05

heart it doesn't feel very good. No, you

10:07

should honestly, stop boxing and just

10:09

just sit made you guys here about the

10:11

lockdown. Yeah, actually, I don't know if you've heard what

10:14

the hell has happened. This is what I heard what was happening. I heard

10:16

that there was this a military facility right there,

10:18

right up on the ridge over there, crazy

10:21

portal opened up, and then all these

10:23

animals are coming on. What are you talking? He's making

10:25

that up. You're writing short stories. I'm

10:28

telling you right now, this is honestly, this is an original

10:30

idea. So this is this is anyway associated

10:32

with anything. That's what kind of animals are coming to, like

10:34

some giant alien things like from a different

10:36

animals, but they could be animals from another plate,

10:39

Okay, an animals. Sorry, and and

10:41

and these things are coming out and and and then

10:43

like and then when we're trapped here, maybe there's going to

10:45

be a religious moment, you know, I mean, maybe people are gonna switch over

10:47

the Bay religions. Tommy, Yeah,

10:49

I just asked about the lockdown. Yeah, that's what I'm

10:51

trying to spit ball on the short

10:54

I'm telling you right now, there's something.

10:57

There's something in that blizzard. Tommy, I've

10:59

asked the wrong person all right. But

11:01

but the thing with it with with a snicker

11:04

salad is it's so hard to find

11:06

the right balance, you know, because I do know,

11:08

Jim, you stay tuned too

11:10

much, too much kale, and it feels like

11:12

it feels crunchy. Two crunchy like

11:15

angels exactly, and too many

11:17

snickers and it feels like desserts. It's well

11:19

what I make. I promise you it isn't that dessert

11:22

attention target customers. We have to

11:24

hold that attention. I want to see this. No,

11:28

me too, I'd like in

11:31

there. Okay, well I'd better stop talking about

11:33

because they're making the announce we're talking over it now.

11:36

Yeah, sorry for that.

11:38

I th inconvenience you. I'll come back in another

11:40

time. No, no, no, it's okay, No, make

11:44

the announcement. Well, so, yeah,

11:46

I do strike a balance. Excuse me, sir,

11:49

you work here? Yes? I do. Uh.

11:51

I notice you don't carry any firearms?

11:53

No, sure, we do, not know it's a target. Okay,

11:56

now get to the point. I'm bow

11:58

tell him why we're here, will

12:01

daddy. I don't know where to look at the one on your

12:03

forehead or the two ones that are so where they're supposed

12:05

to be in your business. All right? Yeah?

12:08

Um, what do you have here

12:10

in this store that would make for a good weapon? Deadly?

12:13

Oh wow? A lot of things. You can sharpen most

12:15

of the items in in the stories. Do you have anything

12:18

that are already sharp? Everything?

12:20

Okay? Here? Yeah, margot or everything's all right.

12:22

I feel so well arrested. I just want to thank

12:24

you. You're so nice. This

12:26

guy, this guy let me sleep. Well,

12:29

come on, I won't stop.

12:31

Come on, I'm not stop. Thank you.

12:34

You're welcome. Okay. You know, it's not often

12:36

that you work for a manager that understands

12:38

who you are. It's a human being. Does she understand

12:40

what the firearms are? I think she understand

12:42

what any firearms because we're

12:45

targets. We're target We don't just a target

12:47

you get like bone arrow,

12:49

that's question. No, we got a bow

12:52

and arrow in the toddler section.

12:54

You know what. Before we move on to the weapons,

12:56

I want to say I do relate. I

12:58

relate to working with the man a jury that gets

13:00

you about, don't do this now. This guy

13:03

here, he's my he's my daddy. You

13:05

got to make me crap. But he's awesome, And

13:08

I mean that in the best way because it is a respective

13:10

issue. Here must

13:12

be what you two feel. Well, this is getting the emotional

13:15

hurt on

13:17

this because you know what, as a

13:19

manager it is not off. And then you

13:21

get to have someone who respects

13:24

you genuinely and not just as a leader,

13:26

but as a person. And okay, I'm going to say

13:28

it as a woman there it is Okay, you're a

13:30

human beings. I see that. I see that you're

13:33

a human beings, and you know what, you deserve

13:35

everything you deserve. Effort,

13:38

find something we can sharp and break out of

13:40

the show very well. So

13:43

you're just gonna get these to go. Should I put

13:45

them on la away for you? Or how do you want to Well,

13:48

yeah, i'd like I'd like them on lay away?

13:50

Thank

13:50

Yeah, So

13:54

you got some cartons of milk? You want that light

13:56

away? Oh, it's

13:58

probably best to put the curtains in my going to lay

14:00

away. And all right, there's

14:03

isn't here. There's just sick people all over the place

14:05

in this target. It's really I'm starting

14:07

to notice it more and more. Yeah.

14:10

Yeah, I don't want to freak you out, but

14:13

word is that there's some some alien

14:15

animals in the in the blizzard getting

14:17

people sick. Oh yeah, really yeah, it

14:19

looks like they're in the blizzard. They're coming in then they there

14:23

it is so obviously

14:26

I can check you out. You can't leave, but

14:29

feel free to bless

14:31

you. Uh,

14:34

this is an original idea I had.

14:37

Oh yeah, so everything okay,

14:40

yeah, everything is the express

14:42

line, so you need to move it apace.

14:44

Yeah, I'm just chatting it up. Well that's what

14:46

I'm saying. You are not chatted up. But

14:50

should I do this self checkout? Well,

14:52

if you do, I lose a job. Oh,

14:56

good to see you, Good to see you. He's single.

15:00

Well, you know it's been five years since

15:02

Molly passed. The

15:05

place still smells like her. You know, No,

15:10

the body is still not there. No, we

15:13

know we buried her if per tradition,

15:16

that in the springtime, because you couldn't bury a body.

15:18

Now you know, I had an uncle who died.

15:20

We couldn't bury him for five months

15:22

and to keep him above ground because it was frozen straight

15:25

through. Is it? Does you place

15:27

haunted? Is that why you smelling? Well? Idias

15:29

haunted? But that's that's a that's

15:31

a different thing entirely. So

15:34

here's what I got. I got a wire hangers. I

15:37

think if we know, we

15:39

can whip people. Did everybody finding their

15:41

snickers? Yeah? Well I

15:43

found my snickers right away. It was in the candy

15:45

et and I was next to Well,

15:47

we're gonna have to get going on this. We're

15:50

under lockdown. I don't know if you're

15:52

aware, but I'm thinking if we uh

15:55

hole up in the home goods area, we can

15:57

make the snicker salad in house peg.

16:00

We we got to be honest with you. There's

16:03

a reason why you haven't seen a cent ten year. You told

16:05

me you're on the lamb. No what

16:08

but what? No? No, but you didn't tell her that part.

16:10

I don't think you should tell him that part. There's a reason

16:13

why we haven't seen you in ten years? Can

16:16

you get we're here now because we're on the

16:18

lamp. The ten years is we don't

16:20

agree with your religious philosophies.

16:23

Why not, Well, we don't believe that there's a

16:25

higher power. Okay,

16:27

so that's why we haven't seen you in ten years. Well, I don't

16:29

care what you believe. Dancing

16:32

around is that we're all

16:34

got wow

16:38

Okay, Leon, Okay, that's

16:40

a narcissist thing to say we're all in

16:44

as long as it's what you know similar to

16:47

what I believe in, you

16:49

also keep it to yourself. No, no, you see

16:51

this thing. Uh and Pig, we

16:54

have an original idea here, one

16:56

that we came up with. Do you realize we're on lockdown?

16:59

In its arguing the blizzard? I got a salad

17:01

to make. Jim's gonna maybe get out

17:03

if they open that door. I've been trying

17:05

to snag. You're coming for us? This

17:08

ain't a blizzard lockdown? Who's

17:10

coming for you? Who?

17:14

So? What do I owe you for today? Looks

17:17

like it looks like comes out to two seventeen.

17:20

Cool boy? Oh boy? Okay,

17:23

okay, so you said you thought there's alien

17:25

animals here. I'll tell you right now

17:28

that's what I've been hearing in it. You guys still

17:30

chatting, Well, we're still chatting it up. There's

17:34

just start a line, Margot. No,

17:37

I'll take the hit on this one. Like once my mouth

17:39

gets gets motor and you know it's uh,

17:42

it's hard for me to start. Okay, we're gonna have to take

17:44

a pause because coming through,

17:47

but I will I want to do tell you, I don't want to hear about

17:50

what I want I

17:52

think the announcement's happening.

17:55

We're talking over y yeah, because I want to

17:57

I don't want to forget. Okay, Oh,

18:00

that's it. That was kind of

18:02

open the clothes, just a series of chimes.

18:04

So it's

18:06

an original idea, it's but it's

18:08

what I heard. Do you get me? No,

18:10

not at all. So I

18:13

heard it through the grapevine that this idea

18:15

that I had. And hey, I can't

18:17

find a price on these towels. It's

18:19

on the inside. The tag should be on the inside, and there's no

18:21

tag tag. I don't

18:24

understand. Do I just take these tags?

18:26

No? No, you can't hold on certain let

18:28

me can I walk with you over to the tower section

18:32

the last forty two minutes over there looking

18:34

for tags? Just just holy

18:37

ship ship? What

18:40

on the class? Oh boy, oh

18:43

boy? What do we got here? Welcome?

18:50

Get away from their welcome?

18:53

This guy is this guy is big, a

18:55

big guy. We got the door thought it.

19:00

You don't think he can get through the glass.

19:02

It's glass, right,

19:05

dimond to cut through? It's

19:08

my understanding of glass. Mago, Margo,

19:13

there's oh you know

19:16

yeah, alright, No,

19:18

I was right here. I can see it. But

19:23

daddy, uncle, I think you know what it's

19:25

time for to us to

19:27

do. We are also

19:30

Eli, We

19:34

are God, You are God. I'm

19:37

up to my elbows in Mayo, trying to make

19:39

this sad by myself

19:42

over here. I hope

19:44

that's quench your thirst, Jeremy.

19:46

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20:32

Alchemy or text Alchemy

20:34

to five hundred dash five

20:36

hundred. That's awesome. I love it. I love

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20:41

you. That address one more time is

20:43

audible dot com, slash alchemy

20:46

or text alchemy to five

20:48

hundred dash five hundred. Scene number

20:50

two comes from mackay another

20:53

email from last year. Hopefully

20:55

it won't sound familiar. I

20:57

like to go through and find the ones that weren't. This

21:00

one's from mcaym He says, I am

21:02

a door door salesman and I sell pest control.

21:05

I have some weird experiences and hear

21:07

of some people on my team doing some weird

21:10

things to get customers to buy the product.

21:12

My it is to act out and encounter at the

21:15

door of a potential customer,

21:17

or the salesperson won't leave no

21:19

matter what the homeowner says. That's

21:22

terrifying. I

21:25

think this leads to

21:28

neighborhood watch being called eventually the

21:30

police. And so thanks

21:32

for keeping my commutes interesting and keep

21:34

up the good word. McKay.

21:36

What is it again that this thing does? Look you

21:39

spray it on a dog or whatever you thought. We

21:42

don't have dogs. It doesn't matter, pest

21:44

decide. Okay, all right, look, we gotta just

21:47

we gotta sell the ship. Okay, okay,

21:49

look, okay, give me a second. Let me just look at it. Was

21:52

this part of the sales pitches man? Did

21:54

you not get the text I hit you? Uh

21:56

no? Okay, well then I lost my phone? All

21:58

right, all right, let's good.

22:02

Okay. How do I smell? Uh? You

22:04

smell? Great? Great? Great? Okay? What

22:06

are you guys doing outside my door? Are

22:10

we're selling? I was just leaving. I don't

22:12

really have any time. Let's go back inside, go back

22:14

inside me? No, no, you guys can't come from

22:16

Pete's pest control. I'm sorry. I'm on my

22:18

way to work. I gotta go. We're on the way. We're working

22:20

out, so come on, we'll give you ause me. What are

22:22

you guys doing outside my door? Lex?

22:26

Okay, well, both of you go inside

22:28

to one let's get all of this. Yeah, but you go in his place.

22:31

What are you guys doing down there? Come

22:33

up up here,

22:36

one floor up? Grab

22:38

my hand, grab my hand. Okay, we're

22:41

having a party. Come on, let's go. This is awkward.

22:43

Okay, I don't want coming. Yeah, okay,

22:45

great, I heard you. Okay,

22:49

alright, great, Okay. Have

22:52

you guys noticed fleas or ticks or turn

22:54

my you have

22:56

a dog? Sure you have no furniture?

22:58

I don't I never I don't. Don't worry

23:00

about my place so weird, weird,

23:03

it's clean. Did you just move in? She's

23:06

been forever, been here

23:08

a while. That is creepy. Where

23:10

do you sleep? Don't worry about

23:13

it? Yeah, do you sleep? That's we're

23:15

going to speak in the bedroom. We're gonna inspect

23:17

for pets. There's a coffin in there, you vampire?

23:19

It up going on a vampire. It's not a coffin.

23:22

Why you never want to host? Yes,

23:25

it's why I never want to host because she's a vampire.

23:27

I'm not a vampire. Vampires.

23:31

Yes, yes, yes, yes,

23:33

yes it does absolutely, it does garlic

23:36

based, great job, Yes, it's garlic based. I

23:38

am not a vampire. Vampire, isn't it really? No,

23:42

don't alaim that at me. Don't your

23:44

crossed. I really got to go to work,

23:47

Bill, Bill. This is weird though, of course

23:49

it's weird. It's really why do you work, sir? It's

23:51

that freaky that I don't have furniture. It's

23:54

freaky, and it's a carpet of department. It's freaky.

23:56

I prefer it like this. I

23:58

prefer it like this, all right, it's just faculous.

24:00

I did Marie condo and

24:03

you put everything nothing?

24:06

Okay, where do you work? Where do you work? Plumb? Mike

24:09

slumbing? Hold on right now? On

24:11

seconds? Mike's hey, Mike, Hey,

24:13

Hi? Uh was not Mike? Okay? Who

24:16

is this is Ted? Ted?

24:18

Okay, it's Mike. Did you work

24:20

with Mike? There is no There is no Mikes

24:22

just the name of the book. Do you know what? Ted? Yeah?

24:25

Great? Great Ted? Ted, I'm here with

24:28

what was you? Bill? Bill? I'm your Bill? And

24:30

he's sick of he can't Bill. I don't know what he

24:33

knows? What he doesn't know? You what he

24:35

knows? Like she didn't say what to do? If nothing

24:37

brought you joy? Okay? What's your last

24:39

name? Peterson? But Bill Peterson? You know Bill Peterson?

24:43

You know that guy? But

24:45

what's going to talk to me about it? What's going on? What history you got?

24:49

Well? I mean he works for me. But are you at work

24:51

right now? Stay right there? Hey, you stay

24:53

here, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go to Ted. Sure,

24:55

where's the shampoo? Where's and he's so leave

24:58

me alone. I'm not Maddy. You in

25:01

nothing nothing? No.

25:03

People were going over we get soap. Most

25:06

did you go from a prison cell right into this apartment.

25:09

I used to have things. What

25:11

happened? I watched Marie Condo

25:13

and I read the book What Sparking Joy and

25:16

it went through item by item and it was after

25:18

a breakup and nothing for me? Joy

25:20

and nothing? Now?

25:22

Can I do have a vacuum? Vacum brings

25:24

a joy? So this

25:27

is a sea piper? Yeah?

25:29

Yeah, that's cool. Anyway, so your

25:31

little handking getting there? That that's that's

25:34

wild. I got tiny hands? Uh?

25:36

What's up with? What's up with? Bill?

25:38

Look? I want to fire the guy, but I just

25:40

don't have the heart to do it. So you're looking for someone to fill

25:42

the job. Would you do it

25:44

for me? Oh? I'm yeah. I mean

25:47

I could be yeah, and then I could Yeah? Would

25:49

you fire him? And

25:52

while I'm here? While I'm here, won't you take a look

25:54

these pesticide pills? Huh?

25:56

So what I just pop one in my mouth? Any

26:02

any pestis that are inside of you?

26:06

I need I need some water? That was not you

26:09

have another one happens like a horse pill. All

26:15

right, I don't know how many supports to take. Hey,

26:18

Ted, good to see you again. Back in the doctor's

26:20

office. Now, I got some good news

26:22

and some bad news for you. I'm sorry to

26:24

do I gave you the wrong papers. Oh

26:28

thank god. Yeah, okay, just

26:31

this is you're

26:33

bad at your job. You're a bad at your job. Now,

26:36

Ted, I'm looking to here. Okay,

26:39

well it's changed because it's a different file. It's

26:41

all good news. Oh great, Yeah, you have

26:43

no more pestis in you.

26:47

I'm so sorry to do this. I don't know you could keep

26:49

going with that and then he could come back. Okay,

26:54

let's pretend I got more pest New

26:57

information just came in. New information. You

27:00

are full of pestis and you have

27:02

poison inside of you. What full

27:04

of pestis and full of poison?

27:07

I thought you told me my pestis didn't even dropped.

27:09

That was for Mr

27:11

Lawrence, who you are not? Um,

27:14

she's not great at what she does. I am great

27:16

at what I want to do. Well, what she wants

27:18

to be is an artist, and she's a great artist than

27:20

you. He's saying, I'm full of pest and poison

27:23

and poison, that's right. What's your recommended?

27:26

Uh, I'm gonna refer to the artists

27:28

in the room. Oh this is the first

27:30

come on. Thank you. Dr Cosmo,

27:34

I think used this pain to propel

27:36

you into your next project. Eastern Eastern.

27:39

Alright, so you want to book a flight to Florida? Is that correct?

27:42

Yeahs an airport

27:44

there, There is an airport. There's the only airport in Florida.

27:47

Uh. Here, we got

27:49

two planes available, one of them, hope

27:51

gonna need one? Okay, well one of them you're gonna

27:53

have to fly the other one. You can just be a passenger.

27:57

I'll do the one where I'm a passenger. I can see

27:59

that that one is filled up. So what

28:01

I'll do is it just get filled. It

28:03

just got filled. So let's let's do

28:05

this. Let's have you if you want

28:08

crashing my place. Hey, Bob, do you

28:10

find me that pilot yet? For flight? Almost

28:13

almost ship?

28:16

Is this my pilot? Uh? Yeah, we're

28:20

just standing there. When are you going to Gainesville?

28:22

And you can fly? Absolutely?

28:30

Born o? My

28:32

God took him set on no angels. So now

28:34

I gotta get a new on the captain.

28:36

Wait, where'd you train? I'll start from

28:38

the sky? Well,

28:40

sure, eventually over

28:43

what town and city? Statesmen bar

28:45

California? Great spot,

28:47

it was a beautiful spot

28:50

place to fly that FLA just

28:52

have the keys to the pling ted.

28:55

We actually found a pilot for the

28:57

Gainesville flight. Okay, that's great. I'm

29:00

sorry. There's just a lot to happen in this morning. What's

29:02

going on? I just found outing full of poison and

29:05

I went straight to the airport to book a flight. Oh

29:08

you gotta turn that painted dart? Yeah, turning

29:10

that paint in dart? Yeah you know. Um,

29:13

it's gonna sound. I don't know if I already pitched

29:15

it. Do you want to come and crash in my place a little

29:17

bit? How would that

29:19

help? Sherry? I don't understand

29:22

how and why the coffin brings you joy

29:25

though it's not. It's not a coffin.

29:27

It's a box.

29:31

That guy called it a coffin. Everyone's

29:33

calling it a coffin, but it's a wardrobe box.

29:35

Bill. Are you going to be late for work? Or it

29:38

was my job? What do you? When

29:41

did this happen? Just happened? I got a call

29:43

when I finally slipped out, fucking

29:45

cockroaches all over the place, and here, what

29:48

is this? Just leave me alone. I didn't

29:50

invite you in. I didn't invite

29:52

you in. Would your pesticide get rid of her cockroaches?

29:55

They're fine. I don't want them. Well, knock

29:57

those cockroaches right the hell out is what it'll

29:59

do. Okay, please leave my home. I

30:02

do love it here. Well,

30:04

these cockroaches are coming out of your pants.

30:07

What do you do? What's the problem? Are

30:09

you bringing bugs into people's homes? I

30:11

would never do that, damn it. Come

30:14

on here, they are

30:17

coming out of your pants. Alright, it's an old

30:19

track in the business. I'm so sorry you put

30:21

cockroaches in your pants. I'll remove them

30:23

for free. I feel wait, I would like

30:25

the group to listen.

30:33

They will, but they will. But alright, how

30:35

many we gotta put in there as you can

30:37

fit? Now you are going to be wanting to loose cargo pants.

30:39

Okay, that means a lot.

30:42

Right now, where did you get the cockroaches

30:45

from? We breed them? Huh?

30:48

How about you got your pants right now? These pills

30:50

safe to swallow? Something?

30:53

Something? Can

30:56

I bring lava? Can you bring a lava?

30:58

Lava?

31:04

All right, welcome folks to fly to thirty

31:07

one. My coo co

31:09

pilots got a few things to say. Let's

31:12

put her on the mic. If you don't mind, co

31:16

Pilot take your way. I'm

31:19

not talking to them. They're talking to the pest

31:21

on the back and there, even

31:23

though I can't see them. That's exactly

31:25

right. Let's trip it as fun.

31:29

It's an intercom stewardess.

31:31

Stewardess, yes, which one, probably

31:35

it's stewardess. That's me, Sam.

31:37

Listen, this is kind of emerging. Whatever I'd like to get

31:39

off this plane before we take off. It just please,

31:43

I mean, it's clear that there's one person up

31:45

there that is not in touch with what it means

31:47

to be a pilot or a co pilot. It

31:49

was it clear. Please, I'm looking

31:51

at buttons, y'all, and

31:54

y'all are alls not all the way

31:56

in your seats? And I want y'all know

31:58

up. I'll do a pretty shake the trust

32:00

punning me. We're gonna be cruising

32:03

at fort hundred months

32:05

today and Sam,

32:08

Hey, Sam, can can you give me a second?

32:11

I can't Okay, I need diet coke and

32:13

I need sweet tea. Please

32:15

fill the stations as you are

32:18

required to. You got it, great? Look

32:20

at me the eye, Sam, thank

32:23

you. I'll let you go up

32:25

my shirt over my

32:27

bra every time this plane takes

32:29

off. And that's not good enough for you. No,

32:32

it's not. It's not because I look at me.

32:34

I want a relationships.

32:36

Your first time flying all

32:39

the time. I just first time.

32:41

This is not a normal flight, you

32:44

and I. It's not. No,

32:48

I will never bow the doors. Look at their

32:50

neighbor alright,

32:55

making eye contact. I got you, buddy,

32:59

Sam, you can grab But no,

33:01

I want a relationship. I don't want to. I don't care.

33:04

I didn't happen over here. This is inappropriate.

33:06

Thank you for thank you. I shouldn't be offering

33:09

your body as a thing. You shouldn't be saying

33:11

it's not enough I want. I'm

33:14

telling the airline I'm ever offered

33:16

your body as a thing. No, I'm a secret. Maybe

33:21

secrets out you're flying? Do

33:23

you guys want to split a bottle of wine with me? Right now?

33:26

You just take a little one, take a little nuts.

33:29

You know that stewardess that's been walking around we

33:31

have a relationship. It's just I can't believe I'm open up to you

33:33

all. I shouldn't be doing this. I'm a steward stewardess

33:36

is those people who were magicians? Is

33:38

that what you're asking? What were you're asking that they before?

33:40

Oh my first time you know maybe

33:43

I shouldn't be in at sea cheers

33:49

stare were in the air a

33:51

flying airplane. Can I

33:53

just say something now that new pilot is

33:55

that they're gonna crash. They're gonna

33:58

crash quickly, right. Look, we

34:00

are in the air, y'all shit

34:02

and fucking everything else. This is your

34:04

pile speaking and we are in the air

34:07

and it is going good. So I'm

34:10

amazed. Terry opened the door,

34:13

opened the door, come out. It's

34:15

just you in a in a soapless

34:18

bathroom. Coaches and

34:22

that scene too. Hey,

34:31

alchemists, I've been listen

34:34

to your podcast since the beginning and it provides

34:37

so much needed levity to my work

34:40

day. Uh. Not to pick favorites,

34:42

but I especially enjoy Vanessa and

34:45

James. I've seen suggestion

34:47

comes from my current work situation. A company

34:50

is pushing its employees to higher and higher productivity,

34:52

including extra hours, and everyone is getting

34:55

understandably burnt out. There

34:57

was one annoying employee trying to keep

35:00

a positive attitude. Can't wait to hear what you want

35:02

to come up with, keep it up erin. Oh

35:08

god, I can't stand working here. I

35:13

can't Somebody kill me,

35:16

dude, super productive, tell

35:22

me tell me how to turn this boat around. Man, But

35:24

turn this boot around. I just wanted all

35:26

day, just want it all to want

35:29

to be here. Let's just take

35:31

a quick break, no

35:34

break, nobody stuff for us back.

35:38

Okay, So what dumb?

35:43

So what's cut you down? I

35:45

just I can't take the hours. I can't work

35:47

more than eight hours a day. Oh come on, it

35:49

doesn't get fun until twelve is up. How

35:52

do you do it? What's your secret? Just tell me. I

35:55

go home and I just work a little more, and I keep

35:57

it from myself. What it's

36:00

just? You know what it's like. The first hour or

36:02

two is just getting yourself repped up to work

36:04

once you're started. I'm

36:06

so sorry, that's

36:10

it. You just keep a positive attitude. I mean,

36:12

you'd be surprised what you can do with the positive attitude.

36:15

Oh that's my colors. Why

36:18

are we? I'm sorry?

36:22

Oh that doesn't take that much pressure to bring it to

36:26

take these screws and make sure that they're

36:28

tightly fastened onto this pump. Good

36:31

job, thank you. Okay,

36:33

So I'm looking over your resume here. Wow,

36:36

yale, Yeah, that's exciting.

36:38

That's exciting. Um, Now

36:40

do you know what it is? We do here, I have no

36:42

idea. Okay, that was kind

36:45

of my issue, you were. You seem overqualified.

36:47

Frankly, we take

36:49

screws, then we tighten them

36:51

onto pipes. So

36:54

I just I just need a job, lady.

36:57

Mm hmm. Okay, Now

37:00

this is what I would call a hostile

37:02

work environment. You see these

37:04

whips. These aren't just for show.

37:07

Okay, we use them on

37:09

the employees. On the employees. All right,

37:12

you're still in Yeah, how much does it the pen?

37:14

Eleven dollars an hour? So

37:16

every hour you make eleven dollars really

37:20

sixty minutes? Boom

37:23

boom. I couldn't

37:25

have it over here. I'm in the cubicle

37:28

next door. Congratulations on your

37:30

education, by the way. Yeah, I

37:32

never thought of it like that every

37:36

hour, so like somebody's going around handing

37:38

out eleven dollar bills just about. I

37:41

always just thought of it as you know, just you get

37:43

it when you get it. But that is a great way to pass,

37:46

like, boom, another eleven

37:48

dollars that you didn't have you now have? I

37:51

love that, honestly, Yeah, okay,

37:53

dood Loring, it's

37:56

okay, yeah, can you break this

37:58

eleven dollar bill? How would you like

38:01

like six one dollar bills

38:03

and then attend all right,

38:06

wait, no, that's sixteen dollars?

38:08

Is that you know? Can I call my manager

38:11

over first? Yeah, Charlie, yeah

38:13

yeah. This generally want to change for eleven dollar.

38:16

This is a seven eleven where people come

38:18

in and open up and

38:21

I'm just getting sick and tired of it. Gives the man what then

38:23

he wants okay, and it's

38:27

one, two, three, five six, And

38:30

you said a twenty

38:32

dollar bill, said a ten dollar bill, right,

38:37

so twenty dollars plus

38:40

the one five six and there

38:42

you go, thank you? And where's the ten dollar bills? So

38:46

you don't want to take this? I'm taking and you're giving

38:48

it. Where's my There's what I asked for? I

38:50

want to do what that guy's doing? Fucking

38:56

pack of do ma'am? What where?

38:59

Where is the sign I'll side of the seventy eleven that says

39:01

come in and tell us how you're feeling. But

39:03

that guy's getting he only wanted

39:05

sixteen dollars, he's six dollars

39:07

maybe, And how is that your business? Well,

39:10

it's became my business when it became in my

39:12

purview. And now I went forts

39:16

this is your fault. By the way, how yeah,

39:21

baby, how's your day it work? You're

39:25

thinking about joining any of those

39:27

nonprofits and maybe one of those big old banks

39:29

to get a job doing something there. Uh no,

39:32

all right, that yell degree is kind

39:34

of just sleeping on the shelf. Look,

39:38

uh, degrees don't work, people do, right,

39:42

Yeah, but you know they're kind of

39:44

like the fuel for the brain and all that, and so it was

39:46

just a white get

39:48

people to know who you are, what you

39:51

want to get that. I'm washing dishes, baby,

39:53

baby, can you get it? God? Hello? Yes,

39:56

Hello, this is professor Rogerson.

39:58

I'm wondering if Steve is there. Yes, of course,

40:01

professor. It's your old professor Rogers and the gun

40:03

give that the guys.

40:05

Look, they give you a big job after college.

40:08

Book. I walked with eight eleven dollar bills

40:10

today. Okay, that's

40:13

not real money. Lots of man's

40:15

work. Maybe just take the screws

40:17

on the pipes all this. He's

40:20

right here, all right, fine, Steve,

40:24

Professor listen,

40:26

I you're not responding to my emails

40:29

and I saw you. That

40:31

must be it. I had the wrong email. I had Steve

40:34

dot A at Gmail. That's

40:36

not you, that's a

40:38

guy I don't look. That's

40:42

the email you gave me at the time. I still

40:44

have that job and we'd love to have you over here. What's again

40:47

making nails? Look,

40:52

you can take your high falutin nail making job.

40:55

I've got a real man's job. I'm

40:58

tightening screws under pipes. Okay,

41:01

what's that bay? Eleven dollars

41:03

an a fresh eleven

41:06

dollars every right up? Yes, every

41:08

hour on

41:10

this hey, professor,

41:13

Hi, welcome, So you are a

41:15

recommendation here at this company. Yes. Now

41:17

shows your previous experience. You were making a hundred

41:19

thirty six thousand dollars a year, so

41:25

okay, so you have a couple of choices. You can keep making

41:27

a hundred and thirty six thousand dollars a year

41:30

or so you're waiting every year to get past

41:32

the hour, so well, wow,

41:35

you just blew. Okay, this feels less specially

41:37

keep going all

41:40

right, So a whole year you can make

41:42

that much money. Or every single

41:44

hour you work here, I'm talking every hour that

41:46

you were in this building, right, eleven

41:48

dollars an hour. Watch this and

41:52

she just made it even dollars. I used

41:54

the clock as a time to count how much

41:56

money I'm making, so in an hour goes byd

41:58

you drop off eleven dollars. I don't drop

42:00

it off. I've never seen cash

42:02

before. What are you so

42:08

it's eleven dollars an hour for the internet cafe?

42:11

Yes, I thank you? Okay, let me just long

42:13

in here? Can I get that first eleven dollars? Yeah?

42:15

Here you go? Thank you, Steven.

42:21

Can you spot me? I didn't

42:23

bring eleven dollars, but I need to get online. I

42:25

don't know you can you spot me? I

42:27

saw in your wallet? I guess I saw in your

42:30

here? Thank you? Okay,

42:32

how Steven done at

42:34

gmail? Excuse me? Good

42:36

help over here? Said, I'm Steve

42:38

dot gmail dot com. You're stevenh

42:42

huh? What are the fucking chances?

42:44

I don't know. I'll tell you what the jeans are?

42:47

Two in Wow,

42:50

have a good day. Thank you your

42:53

love. Here's your campuccino?

42:55

Thank you? Is that so

42:59

that's your Uh? It's

43:01

a it's the cafe's computer. That's what I thought.

43:04

Could you get your ship off of it? I

43:07

just want to make it more like my home, right, but

43:09

it isn't. It belongs to the cafe. Okay,

43:11

I could take off the baby babies. Yeah,

43:13

thanks, okay, I appreciate that. Let

43:16

me know if you know anything else. Okay, what

43:20

is the A stand for almi

43:22

in? Oh? I

43:26

don't have any messages? Okay,

43:30

well all right, thank you. You're

43:34

in a cafe. Are you sure you don't

43:36

want to stay a little bit longer? He's still

43:38

this cappuccino on me have

43:41

a burning this place for everything? Sing

43:44

this place where this is just a small mom and

43:46

pop internet cafe. I'm a

43:48

lawyer. Oh wait, you guys don't need

43:50

to talk to each other. I'm a lawyer. Come on,

43:55

let's take him for everything. Stop

43:57

it. You didn't even pay an eleven dollars. You're

44:00

just standing here glucking it out of the Okay, okay,

44:02

so let me get this straight. You you killed

44:04

somebody. No, no, no, no, in the case

44:07

the person died because they

44:10

You're my lawyer, So anything I can say, Hey,

44:12

this is a seven eleven, for God's sakes, Okay,

44:15

this is my clients. This

44:17

is my clients. Yeah, whatever, whatever, Okay, But to be

44:20

fair, I can talk about it if I want. I want

44:22

a hundred dollars and that hot dog. I

44:25

killed the lawyer because he was offering to represent

44:27

the burnt down those dogs. Good? Are you even

44:29

paying attention? Okay,

44:32

go for go for go for you killed, I

44:34

didn't kill. He's still out there

44:36

and I want you to find her and need coming

44:41

to my office. UM, I have good news for

44:43

you. We're giving you a

44:45

race. Every

44:48

thirty minutes. You were going to get a

44:51

small bag from a variety pack of chips

44:54

of your choosing. Now that's every

44:56

thirty minutes of the day. Whatever

45:01

you like. I couldn't help it.

45:03

Over a year. You must

45:05

have done something right. Smarty pants, blaze,

45:10

Friedo's cattle. There's

45:12

no kettle. We're

45:15

not made of money. Baby with the chips,

45:19

ruffles, Frito's classic

45:23

five honey. None of this is gonna pay

45:25

the bills, all right, have some chips?

45:29

Can you get that? I'm washing the dishes, Can

45:31

you get it? God? Hello,

45:35

I'm here to collected bills. Just

45:39

one second to it's the bill person.

45:41

We don't have any money. Bag of chips. Would

45:44

you take these fritos except

45:50

chip there in my hand? I took them, she

45:52

offered, Thank you. I'm

45:55

also gonna need five seventy

45:57

dollars. Seventy that's

46:01

very reasonable. Stop

46:03

crying. Dollars, and now you don't.

46:06

I don't any more bad I get bait and chips. Now, oh

46:08

my god, in

46:11

my office. Now you're the one who walks around the office

46:13

saying, work, work, work, all the tame. I've been doing a really

46:15

good job. I got a broken collar bone and

46:17

a lot of news for you. Bad

46:20

news for you. You are now going to

46:22

be making less hourly than you were.

46:25

I'm sorry. I couldn't help it over here, but

46:28

I'm almost productive member of the

46:30

team. What does productive mean to you? It means

46:32

that I got the most screws into pipes.

46:35

And it's the problem

46:37

what I have. I

46:41

bring the moral up. Get this, get this every

46:44

hour when you're making money, he

46:47

will be making less than that. We're going to be removing

46:50

the pocket change he currently has change

46:53

on the bus. I'm so sad

46:55

to hear that. Well, hang in there,

46:59

we're going to I'm going back to

47:01

fifth and Main Street. It needs a change,

47:03

that right, I don't. I don't have any

47:05

change. I just got back.

47:09

Oh you got any chips? You

47:11

know? They actually the only thing I have? Just these?

47:14

Can I get the bus? So I don't

47:16

have any change out there? But my husband he was

47:18

a lawyer. He was killed today

47:20

in a computer move

47:25

an elf under. I'm

47:27

not I'm a little pleas would no, but

47:29

you have jingles on your Okay. Now

47:32

we're getting into problematic territory, alright,

47:34

and I just really need to take this bus home.

47:36

I take a job at the mall, Okay,

47:39

and I feel like shit about it? So

47:42

do we want to keep talking about it? My husband? The

47:46

little work that

47:49

you know, I have a degree. How would

47:51

I just hang onto the back of the bus and you just dragged

47:54

me? Just

47:58

do it? Okay, Just don't. Yeah,

48:00

we hung on to the back of a bus before. Just

48:03

say it's the first time. It's

48:05

my first time too. I just got to

48:07

Gainesville, you know, earlier this week. Yeah, I was

48:09

really hoping for some tips. I feel like my knees. Yeah,

48:14

I'm gonna keep your legs loose.

48:17

You don't want to keep your ass closed.

48:20

You don't want to keep your tongue inside of your mouse, because

48:23

honestly, the jowl and the biggest

48:25

thing you're not not not It's just like that's

48:28

the biggest thing that's the problem, is

48:30

boughting on a tongue off. That

48:32

makes sense, Sam,

48:37

you touched my butt. You touched

48:40

under my shirt. I don't understand

48:42

why you're not happier. You

48:44

don't talk to me. You don't

48:46

talk to me. I let you touch me where

48:49

I tell you. But you touched me with your tongue in

48:51

a way that it's it's a word that you're using

48:53

to get to my heart. Not in Gainesville.

48:56

Not in Gainesville. So maybe that's problem, and

48:59

maybe that's me problem, so

49:02

good luck. Maybe that's a meat problem.

49:05

Maybe that's a meat up problem. Maybe

49:07

that's a meat'srouts from.

49:10

Maybe I knew a man once

49:12

named Stephen dot a

49:15

meep Us, and maybe

49:17

I'm I'm in love with him, and maybe

49:19

if you found him, maybe you and I could talk

49:21

until then and

49:26

be happy. Do you guys want more garlic?

49:29

Man? Yeah, we're done? Oh?

49:31

Interesting there? All right?

49:33

Well, when you were touching that garlic bread, your hands were kind

49:35

of burning. So is that all right? Is a garlic bread hot?

49:37

Not too hot? And I'm sorry you saw me touching it.

49:41

You have blisters all your head. It's a separate

49:43

blister incident the bread. No

49:48

I'm not you're a vampire. Take

49:51

it back? No, No, I don't mind. Excuse

49:54

me? Is it not if it's

49:56

not too much trouble, i'd I'd love to get a drink

50:00

to my uh you know my No,

50:03

I'm sorry. I was in a target

50:05

in Minnesota. I got attacked by an alien lives

50:11

there. Oh yeah, you

50:16

don't wait, Jim,

50:18

Jim, Yeah, I've heard of you. Fus

50:22

pharmacist. Yeah, but you gotta have a slip

50:24

from the doctor, you know. Yeah, that's how it works.

50:27

Did you want to drink to your seat or yeah?

50:29

I drink to my seat. And did anyone

50:31

want more garlic bread? I brought enough for the whole

50:33

plane. I don't

50:35

think anyone should have it. You're a vampire.

50:38

I'm not a vampire. I wouldn't make garlic bread

50:40

if there was a vampire genie. That's just one way

50:42

to pass, you know. I mean, that's the one with you to be like, oh, that's

50:44

the main way to pass. And a girl, if

50:47

you made some for the whole plane, you know, i'd take

50:49

some off your hands, absolutely,

50:51

any front of debs here you go. Sorry,

50:53

I'm touching it. Well, my wife used to make garlic

50:56

bread, and uh she's

50:58

dead. She gassed and then

51:01

Prince passed. It's been a hard did

51:04

you want wine? Well, you

51:06

know, I don't want to be too much trouble. But it's not trouble.

51:08

You want wine, Sure, a little

51:11

whiskey. I'll take a little wis mix

51:13

them together. How do you want it? Whiskey with wine?

51:15

Want apple juice? Yeah, a little apple juice

51:18

and whiskey and wine. That sounds to shake it up? Do you

51:20

want to shake it up? That sounds good. I

51:22

can do that. Not a problem, not a problem? You a napkin?

51:25

No, No, I don't want to trouble. You know what's

51:28

that press? Stropple?

51:31

He's got stroup waffle savmy

51:36

hand me a pipe with a screw in it. Please

51:45

goddamn it? Oh god, I

51:48

cut my hand off. There's

51:50

pine the screw and the pipe wasn't screw

51:53

tight enough. Who the hell made this? It

51:55

says it's from from Mike's

51:57

plumbing. Mike's plumbing. It's

52:00

get down there, Mike's

52:04

yeah. Hey, it's just Mike. No, this is Ted.

52:07

Can I talk to Mike. There

52:09

is no Mike. It's just why is it called Mike Blumman?

52:11

It's just you know, it's a logo thing. Yeah, we had

52:13

an accent. One of my guys lost his hand. Okay,

52:17

so uh look, I'm gonna I'm

52:19

gonna be honest with you. I'm I'm in Gainesville

52:22

now. I took a couple of pesticide pills,

52:24

okay, and I'm loaded with poison and

52:27

my doctor told me to turn my paint

52:29

into art. So you know, right, I'll

52:32

be a drag behind a bus in Gainesville right

52:34

now, there's an alien animal. That's

52:38

our show for today. We'll

52:41

get back on the rails next week, and for now, let's

52:44

thank all of our alchemists, starting with Dynasty

52:48

typewriter dot Com. Yeah. Oh, it's such

52:50

a great theory and I can't wait to get back there. Upcoming

52:53

shows. Go to the calendar, Go to the calendar,

52:55

go to the website, the instagram All Dynasty

52:57

Typewriter is the cotton candy

53:00

Owl's beards getting back in acts.

53:02

Oh, good, good, good good. James Heney the

53:04

Real James Heeney dot Com is where you can find some stuff

53:06

from me, alright, and that's where we'll go. Chris

53:09

Avarado at Chris Evarado, No, he's

53:11

simple enough. And Mr Craig the

53:14

Craigslist Podcast is back. We're on hiatus for

53:16

a while, but We're now in my Top ten movies

53:18

and uh. You can follow us at Craigslist,

53:20

Pea Cast on Twitter and

53:23

Joey Greer at Jeviy Greeber on Instagram,

53:25

and check out my album good Night on Spotify

53:27

or items. Let's thank our

53:29

engineer to the stars, Mr Doug Bainer.

53:33

My heart Media. Chill

53:38

next time, ha,

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