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1:07

Soft Teddy. Titty. P.

1:09

G. Here we are

1:11

again. It's Tom. And

1:14

it's Demi. Big Soft.

1:16

Titty. P. G. Here we

1:18

are again. It's Tom and

1:20

it's Demi. But only us

1:22

too, surely. Oh, well, Tom,

1:25

have you forgotten everything

1:27

we spoke about just

1:29

now? What? We have

1:31

a friend? with us we were

1:34

speaking about something just because you

1:36

took him off of the screen

1:38

doesn't mean he died wait a

1:40

second whoa what's that window capture

1:42

source I see there in OBS

1:44

why it's our friend Jackson Bailey

1:47

whoa I'm here the whole time all

1:49

right let's do some I guess just

1:51

what's the what's the word for

1:53

when you do some admin up

1:55

the top I guess admin but

1:57

also I was yeah housekeeping housekeeping

2:00

Let's do some housekeeping. Good idea. I

2:02

want to keep some houses immediately. It's

2:04

so important for me to keep these

2:06

houses. For one thing, Demi is looking

2:08

and sounding groggy because she just threw

2:10

up from an incredibly detailed description of

2:13

a guy sucking on a crusty sock.

2:15

So, she is currently undergoing some hardships.

2:17

And we're all proud of her. In

2:19

fact, me evoking it just then, I

2:21

believe has caused a reiteration that her-

2:24

Yeah, it's gonna say. Her two separate,

2:26

tiny, zero sugar coca colas that she

2:28

has near her are not doing anything

2:30

to fight off. Demi's not doing too

2:32

well, gang. But thankfully, we have wonderful

2:34

Jackson here from D&D is for nerds

2:37

and the Sandspense Radio Network from plumbing

2:39

the death cell. One of- The podcasting

2:41

goats, and I don't just mean like

2:43

wonder out to the freaking pen with

2:45

a microphone. I don't even wonder out

2:48

on the pen with a microphone and

2:50

get some take on it, you know,

2:52

I mean, a goat would probably hear

2:54

me say, put on your cans so

2:56

you can hear yourself, and it'd probably

2:59

be like, I already ate my dank

3:01

hands. I remember once, I was hanging

3:03

out of my goat, um, out of

3:05

farm. And, uh... I kept trying to

3:07

feed him a can, but he wouldn't

3:09

eat it. No, it was very, it

3:12

was very frustrating. Nobody wants to work.

3:14

That's such a shame. Did you have,

3:16

like, was it an opened can or?

3:18

Well, it was at, I was at

3:20

this farm, and I just, it was

3:23

like a can of Coke, it was

3:25

like an old can of Coke, and

3:27

they had this goat, and the goat

3:29

had been eating my shoelaces, so I

3:31

thought, like, you know, obviously, That isn't

3:33

good. So you have this can. He's

3:36

eating stuff. Let me tell you a

3:38

better story about that farm, okay? Because

3:40

this story is insane. I mean, I'm

3:42

already having so much fun with the

3:44

goat eating your shoelaces and then you

3:47

trying to make it eat a can.

3:49

I don't even know if I'm ready

3:51

to rank up so much. And the

3:53

goat refused to eat a can. He

3:55

must not have been a millennial. Wow.

3:57

Damn. Of course millennials love to eat

4:00

butts. This is another, I'm going to

4:02

tangent on a tangent,

4:04

but this is my sexual

4:06

prediction for 2025. Can

4:09

I get that out too?

4:11

Yeah, let me, I'm actually

4:13

going to, because we're all

4:15

broken brain freaks, I'm actually

4:17

opening up a notepad document and

4:20

I'm just going to keep

4:22

this here to keep us

4:24

all in line. I would say

4:26

the last couple years have been

4:28

the year of the foot, right?

4:31

No free feet picks. You know,

4:33

whatever that foot fetish website is,

4:35

we get ads where they're like,

4:38

I made a million dollars

4:40

selling my feet or whatever.

4:42

The last couple years. I

4:44

think they sell their feet.

4:46

I think mostly it's pictures.

4:49

Well, maybe the pictures will

4:51

lead to a sort of a permanent,

4:53

you know, a foot. Like, if I

4:56

was like, well, I'm going to

4:58

keep it, but it's yours. Yeah,

5:00

I think you should be able

5:02

to do that. I think you

5:04

should be allowed. If you're allowed

5:07

to, like, rename a star, like,

5:09

you know, if you're allowed to

5:11

keep that crappy business model going,

5:13

that's just a lie, I think

5:16

it'll be fine to be, yeah,

5:18

I see no difference between being

5:20

like, oh, I bought you

5:22

this charity goat. But you can't

5:24

have it, you know? You know,

5:26

when people are like, yeah, I bought

5:29

a goat, but I gave it

5:31

to this really skinny kid somewhere else

5:33

instead of you. So, but that's

5:35

your goat. Yeah, kind of, till

5:37

it gets eaten or milk, or

5:40

whatever. When it gets milked, it's

5:42

not your goat anymore. I want to

5:44

milk the goat. When they're done with

5:46

the goat, when they're out of need,

5:48

when the goat lifts them out of

5:50

their condition, do I get a go?

5:52

Yeah. Can I, can I jump in?

5:54

I'll take sloppy seconds on the goat.

5:56

I don't mind. Go on the goat.

5:58

But it is my goat. Technically.

6:00

Hanging me to my go. So

6:03

the prediction for 2025. Yeah, okay.

6:05

So the last couple years have

6:07

been the year of the foot,

6:09

I believe 2025, or has been

6:11

the era of the foot, shall

6:13

we say? I believe 2020. Foot?

6:15

What kind of diseases are you

6:18

going to get? Foot and ear

6:20

disease? You keep hearing the wrong

6:22

thing. I think 2025 and beyond

6:24

is going to be the era

6:26

of the pit. I think we're

6:28

swapping feet for pits. That's my

6:30

belief. I believe the... The three

6:33

pits? Yeah, the armpit fetishist movement

6:35

has been bubbling and I want

6:37

to say it's been, it seems

6:39

to be attaining a lot of

6:41

prominence in like the anime pervert

6:43

community, which is an incredibly strong...

6:45

If you're trying to get a

6:48

body part to become normalized as

6:50

sexual, that's the demographic you want.

6:52

It feels very French, like an

6:54

armpit fetish feels quite French to

6:56

me. I can see that. Yeah,

6:58

absolutely. You know, sniffing a pit

7:00

on a chalet somewhere, drinking wine.

7:02

Yeah. Certainly. Yeah, or a chaise

7:05

lounge even. And now we can

7:07

possibly get a third French object.

7:09

What's another French object? Well, of

7:11

course a table. a woman and

7:13

they kind of have that fun

7:15

thing where they're always like well

7:17

first off to learn our language

7:20

you have to remember mouths as

7:22

a girls and a horse is

7:24

a boy just an extra wrinkle

7:26

on top what's a lady's name

7:28

from um inception Marian Cotillard. That's

7:30

my French word. That's awesome. Marian

7:32

Cotillard. Why do they give me

7:35

such a strange name in this

7:37

movie? Oh yeah, her name's Mal.

7:39

It's Mal. Mal. Mal. Mal. Mal.

7:41

Mal. M-O-L. Which is like a

7:43

rude word that you use when

7:45

you're like 15. And you say

7:47

it behind your teacher's back. Really,

7:50

you fucking mole. So it's the,

7:52

you believe that we're entering the

7:54

age of the pit. I believe

7:56

it's coming. I understand that and

7:58

I think you're right. I think

8:00

armpits are gaining massive amounts of traction

8:02

and I think in the next by

8:05

I want to say maybe July we're

8:07

going to be seeing a great deal

8:09

I think there's going to be a

8:11

lot more armpit memes and maybe even

8:14

by the end of the year

8:16

we'll get like an armpit dedicated

8:18

website I sort of think. Yeah I

8:20

remember there was a thing when I

8:22

was still in school people being like

8:24

do you know that some people fuck

8:26

armpits and I was like no they

8:29

don't shut up What are you talking

8:31

about? You just, you went on Four

8:33

Chan once and that was it. And

8:35

they were like, no, it's real. It's

8:37

called Auxiliary Sex. And I was like,

8:39

if it was real, maybe. Shut up.

8:41

I do remember, like. Okay, I feel

8:43

like the way I interact with like

8:45

the the steady creep of sexual fetishes.

8:48

For one is by incorporating them into

8:50

my own browsing habits and kind of

8:52

thinking to myself, well, this will fix

8:54

it. The steady creep is very good at

8:57

having fetishes. Yes, certainly. He's kind of,

8:59

he's able to keep that part of

9:01

his life like scheduled and rhythmic no

9:03

matter what chaos comes his way. Yeah,

9:06

it's, it's through fighting games. Oh, I

9:08

see. So Street Fighter Six, of course,

9:10

just came out. And that's kind of

9:13

a brand new take on, I think

9:15

the new characters they've introduced for that,

9:17

the newcomers that come to mind for

9:19

me, Aki and Jamie. Jamie being like

9:22

kind of a ripped guy with an

9:24

exposed midriff. who is, whenever I

9:26

play him on stream, I

9:28

get a lot of comments

9:30

to like, Jamie is a

9:32

slutty character. Like, Jamie is

9:34

wearing it out. He's going

9:36

crazy mode. But then, Aki,

9:38

Yes, Aki is, I think,

9:40

a female back-led character. When I

9:42

think of this because Street Fighter

9:44

4, I want to say, introduced

9:46

jury, who is the foot character

9:49

par excellence. Like that is a

9:51

barefoot fighter who fights with Taekwondo.

9:53

It's a kicking style. But she

9:55

also spends a lot of time

9:57

caressing her opponents with her feet.

9:59

You know? A lot of foot

10:01

stuff. And that was to me

10:03

the start of it being truly

10:05

popularized. It's so strange. Her critical

10:08

art three has her like picking

10:10

her opponent's head up off the

10:12

floor with her foot, stroking the

10:14

side of her with her foot,

10:17

and then kicking it gently. TV

10:19

in the only 2000s. Kind of

10:21

thinking about Jamie Jewry. Kind of

10:23

thinking about Jamie Jew. That's what

10:26

I'm thinking about when I say

10:28

that. That's amazing. We should have

10:30

been still vomiting a new more

10:32

often, my love. This is your

10:35

Michael Jordan flu game. Guy who

10:37

believes that Michael Jordan was put

10:39

down humanely after his flu game.

10:41

Yes, please. So let me finish

10:43

my story about the farm. I'm

10:46

going back. I'm going to finish

10:48

all tangents. That's my promise this

10:50

episode. That's why we have the

10:52

notepad. Yeah, exactly. So I was

10:55

at this farm. So we're talking

10:57

about Jamie Jerry. I'm just going

10:59

to mute her microphone whenever she

11:01

starts doing this. I think that's

11:04

a great idea. Yeah, Demi is

11:06

in like a state of being

11:08

where she starts to identify. Word

11:10

association as jokes, or worthy of

11:13

saying out loud. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

11:15

yeah. It's like broadcasting doing a

11:17

live show with someone who's gotten

11:19

tanked before the show and is

11:21

so high on their own supply.

11:24

They don't realize. Okay. So, okay,

11:26

I'm at the farm. And I'll

11:28

even name the farm. I forget

11:30

the name of the farm. So

11:33

I'm at the farm. I'm at

11:35

the farm. Make it up. Make

11:37

up the name of the farm.

11:39

Keep them going. I love this.

11:42

I love it. So I'm at

11:44

the farm and I'm sitting there

11:46

drinking coffee. It's on the way

11:48

to fill a pile on this.

11:51

farm and I see this family

11:53

at the farm at the time

11:55

in a little petting zoo area

11:57

had a baby cow or better

11:59

known as a cough and this

12:02

family was hanging out with the

12:04

cough playing with it and this

12:06

woman who's part of the family

12:08

she would probably been about like

12:11

26 27 she was like oh

12:13

it's feeding It's currently in its

12:15

feeding stage and then she put

12:17

her whole hand in the coughs

12:20

mouth up to the wrist and

12:22

started face-fucking the cough with her

12:24

hand. She was like, oh how

12:26

cute, it's feeding, it's looking for

12:29

like a nipple or an utter

12:31

or whatever and she just had

12:33

her whole hand in there going

12:35

like wagging it, like wagging it

12:37

around. Yeah, when you say Facebook,

12:40

are you saying like piston style

12:42

or are you saying like shoes?

12:44

Yeah, how do you fuck? What

12:46

are you talking about? How does

12:49

that relate to? I don't know.

12:51

It was crazy. It sounds like,

12:53

yeah, that's just, I'm gonna do

12:55

this no matter what, but I'm

12:58

gonna comment on the car while

13:00

I do it. I'm gonna find

13:02

some excuse and she like yeah

13:04

she kind of excused it by

13:07

being like oh I think she

13:09

even said to somebody else that

13:11

were there she's like oh I

13:13

grew up on farms so I

13:15

know they hate it when you

13:18

do this and I'm just like

13:20

holding on for dear life. It's

13:22

head waggling up and down and

13:24

she wasn't crazy. First of all,

13:27

they hate doing this, but second

13:29

of all, this cow is evil

13:31

and I can tell. So don't

13:33

worry. I grew up on farms

13:36

and the great thing about cows

13:38

is you can kind of do

13:40

whatever. Check this out. Do I

13:42

get like a waiter and say,

13:45

hey, should that be happening over

13:47

there? Should she be doing that

13:49

to the cough? Yeah, this cough

13:51

is, so it's in like it's

13:53

suckling era or whatever. Yeah. And

13:56

then she says like, ah, and

13:58

this cough is. in its hungry

14:00

ear and she starts kicking the

14:02

shit out of its stomach. Yeah. Should she

14:05

be doing that? Excuse me, waiter, I have

14:07

a question about the woman and who is

14:09

doing those activities to the cast. She'll be

14:11

with you in just a second, sir. Oh,

14:14

we'll have your mouth and body being seen to

14:16

in just a moment. Say no more. Oh, yes.

14:18

Sorry, that's confusing Clarissa. She

14:20

comes around a lot. Yeah, that

14:22

makes a lot of sense to me

14:24

that you would kind of do whatever

14:26

you wanted to with a with a

14:28

calf if you know if the opportunity

14:30

arose Yeah, yeah, of course Nobody was

14:32

you know the people that she was

14:34

with they weren't saying anything they weren't

14:36

saying shit, so you know, it's funny to

14:38

turn to I mean, I guess there

14:41

were probably more people around the calf

14:43

than Just her but it is

14:45

funny to turn to your family

14:47

and say I grew up on

14:49

a farm So this is okay,

14:51

we're presumably yeah Remember my family?

14:53

Yeah, we all we did too.

14:55

We're waiting our turn when you're

14:57

done with the calf We're making

14:59

my hand in we always want

15:01

to do the activity She was

15:03

so deep in that cough's mouth.

15:05

It was it was insane to

15:07

see it was truly I didn't

15:09

know what was, I didn't know how

15:11

to handle it. I didn't know what

15:14

to do. Cows are so fucking cute.

15:16

Like especially, especially baby cows. Like big

15:18

cows are awesome. You can like look

15:20

in their eyes and stuff and be

15:22

like, I bet you know how to

15:25

love. But then like a baby cow,

15:27

you're like, oh, you are just like

15:29

a kind of more beautiful dog. Yeah,

15:31

oh, absolutely. I remember seeing this

15:33

thing with this lady was like,

15:36

like a cow is great as

15:38

a pet. and shake it and

15:40

throw it around or whatever and

15:42

you can't. But with a cow,

15:44

cow don't give a fuck. You

15:47

can do whatever the fuck. Which,

15:49

yeah, that is appealing. That is

15:51

appealing. I can see that being

15:53

very appealing. Yeah, no,

15:56

absolutely. Squeezing, too? Most

15:58

appealing indeed. Most appealing

16:00

indeed to ragdoll my calf that

16:02

I got for Christmas. Oh, thank

16:04

you so much, Daddy. Thank you

16:06

so much. The calf I always

16:08

wanted turned back to me and

16:10

I'm just German suplexing the cow.

16:12

Plinging it down a hill? Yeah,

16:14

I'm practicing my moves on the

16:16

cow. I'm like, go to sleep,

16:18

go to sleep, go to sleep,

16:21

go to sleep, go limp. Shh!

16:23

Shh! Go to sleep, cow. Tapping

16:25

on my elbow with its hoof.

16:27

So you say you were at

16:29

this farm. Were you like traveling

16:31

through the farm to get to

16:33

somewhere else? That's my impression so

16:35

far. So the farm is like

16:37

completely. equidistant between Philip Island and

16:39

Melbourne. So I tend to stop

16:41

there when I'm going to Philip

16:43

Island and also they have this

16:45

big area where you can see

16:47

the cow is getting milked and

16:49

that's always kind of a treat.

16:51

I don't like that. It's known

16:53

as the utter, that's the big

16:55

area. I don't like that you

16:57

stop off and again, let me

16:59

kind of... There's something about like

17:01

recently hit on head demi who

17:03

delights in word play. Like uninteractable

17:05

word play. I think it was

17:07

funny. I don't like you stopping

17:09

off at a place to watch

17:11

the cow's female specifically, but that's

17:13

just me. Why does it strike

17:15

you as unwholesome in some way?

17:17

Yes. Did you, so you're talking

17:19

about going to Philip Island. What

17:21

is Philip Island? Oh, Philip Island

17:23

is this, it's an island about

17:25

maybe two hours away from Melbourne.

17:27

It's like a kind of holiday

17:29

destination. They've got penguins and, uh,

17:31

uh, pelicans, you can see. It's

17:33

kind of a bird island is

17:35

what I'm picking up here. Kind

17:37

of a place for the bird

17:39

fans. And then on the way

17:41

you get some cows, so you

17:43

kind of treat yourself to a

17:45

mammal or two as well. I

17:47

think there's also a koala sanctuary

17:49

there that's pretty good to see.

17:51

It's good to see the koala's

17:53

struggle to do anything, you know.

17:55

Yeah. That's always entertaining. Especially with

17:57

a lady there who grew up

17:59

in a farm and so she's

18:01

now just like a... I've got

18:03

a hand fully inside the koala

18:06

is just going crazy. Waggling his

18:08

head around, yeah, God damn. Throwing

18:10

penguins into a wall. That's basically

18:12

what you do. I grew up

18:14

on a farm, so. I grew

18:16

up on a farm. We always

18:18

wanted to do this. That's interesting.

18:20

I would never, so do you

18:22

go there on holiday? It's interesting,

18:24

I'm trying to picture you as

18:26

a person on a holiday. On

18:28

a holiday. Yeah. A holiday. What

18:30

was that sorry? Your life seems

18:32

like a holiday because of the

18:35

joy that you take in such

18:37

strange things. So like, what are

18:39

you, what are you doing if

18:41

you're going on a holiday? Seeing,

18:43

seeing stuff. Yeah, penguin helican, so

18:45

on, koala, struggling. Walking around, I

18:47

guess. Yeah. I think you're a

18:49

great observer, Jackson. I think you

18:52

are, I think you are really

18:54

good at noticing things and kind

18:56

of storing them away for later.

18:58

Just things where you like. That's

19:00

quite odd. How peculiar. Yeah, yeah,

19:02

you're a great mutterer of how

19:04

peculiar, I would say. If that's

19:06

my legacy, so be it, you

19:09

know. He sure saw a lot

19:11

of stuff. But so you go

19:13

to Philop Island. Obviously you passed

19:15

through this file on the way

19:17

there. But you get to Philop

19:19

Island, what's happening? So I'll get

19:21

to Philop Island. Oh God, what

19:23

did I do last time I

19:26

was there? Well, like we went

19:28

to the koala sanctuary, wandered around,

19:30

looked at that. Here's the thing

19:32

about the koala sanctuary. I swear

19:34

the first, because I've been twice

19:36

in my life, and I swear

19:38

to God the first time I

19:40

went, they had this little information

19:43

booth where they were like once

19:45

somebody tried to raise a koala

19:47

like a man, and that it

19:49

nearly worked. But then I went

19:51

there again, and that booth was

19:53

gone. Now I don't know if...

19:55

They had to take it down

19:57

for some reason. Maybe the... How

20:00

is the bee? Didn't want that

20:02

information getting out? I don't know. Or

20:04

maybe I missed, I just made the

20:06

whole thing up, but I swear to

20:08

God I remember watching this black and

20:10

white video of like a koala sitting

20:13

in a high chair getting like fed

20:15

vegmite and then the like old-timey Australian

20:17

narrator being like, they tried to feed

20:19

the koala vegmite and raised it like

20:21

a little more. But it wasn't there

20:24

the second time I went, so I

20:26

don't know, maybe that didn't happen. The

20:28

big pain point for me in this

20:30

story is where you said, and it

20:32

nearly worked. I think of all the

20:35

things I want to take issue with,

20:37

going in order, I think that's got

20:39

to be the first one. Because

20:41

also, what is the end point

20:43

of that experiment? Like, what do

20:46

you mean it nearly worked? It

20:48

really became a man? Almost

20:50

got him, but then he

20:52

blew up. Dang. like he

20:54

was like riding a tricycle

20:56

with a real boy like he

20:58

was like he became a brother

21:00

he became a brother to a

21:02

real boy I just, okay, I

21:05

just, I didn't koala tricycle and

21:07

it did auto complete to koala

21:09

tricycle raised as man, but I

21:11

don't know if that's because I

21:13

just before had googled koala raised

21:15

as man. And I don't, I

21:17

can't find any results for this.

21:19

So I do think this seems

21:22

like a kind of thing that

21:24

you made. up by yourself. Tom,

21:26

what was the, can you please

21:28

quickly read out just the first

21:30

Google result that came up there?

21:33

The curious sex tales of the

21:35

Kuala, Wild Kuala Day, May 3rd.

21:37

Hey, female, female, female

21:40

koalas have three vaginas.

21:42

I didn't know that. Damn, throw one

21:44

of my way home. What I need

21:46

one of those. What are I doing with

21:48

all that pussy? Well, that's too

21:50

much pussy for one koala. That

21:53

seems like a lot. Jackson, welcome

21:55

to just a live read-through

21:57

of Australian wildlife journeys.com's blog.

21:59

the curious sex tales of the

22:02

koala, wild koala day, May 3.

22:04

Thank you Janine Duffy for posting

22:06

this on the 30th of April,

22:09

2017. Female koalas have three vaginas.

22:11

Under all that fluff and chubby

22:13

cuteness, there's a lot of woman.

22:16

How? She still has a single

22:18

opening to the exterior, but just

22:20

inside, the vagina branches into three.

22:23

Why? It's part of her mercupial

22:25

heritage. The plumbing runs through the

22:27

middle of the baby factory. What

22:30

the fuck? Preventing the three branches

22:32

from fusing into one. Ew! The

22:34

plumbing? runs through the middle of

22:37

the baby factory. Not good. Can

22:39

you not say shit like that

22:41

in your fucking koala story? I'd

22:44

rather you didn't. Jesus. Coming up

22:46

next, Demi, do you want to

22:48

take this one? Yeah, all right.

22:51

Male koalas have a forked penis.

22:53

Yeah. Watching a male koala become

22:55

aroused is like a scene from

22:58

an alien horror movie. Not only

23:00

does his penis have two heads.

23:02

It is pink, very large and

23:05

prominently vain. Now, do we all

23:07

want to kind of... Sorry, the

23:09

third fucking fact. Yeah, okay. The

23:12

third fact is, Kuala Sex is

23:14

voice activated. Which is to say,

23:16

they have an amazing call, and

23:19

the amazing call in this case

23:21

is like, they prefer a deeper

23:23

voice, I believe, because it carries

23:26

a tone of like, largeness. Oh,

23:28

I see. Kowala penis and switch

23:30

into the images tab at the

23:33

same time. I was going to

23:35

say, okay, I'm ready. I already

23:37

am seeing it. Jesus Christ. Yeah,

23:40

it looks like a bamboo. Whoa,

23:42

that is crazy. That's a crazy.

23:44

What the hell? Wow. It looks

23:46

like a, like one of those

23:49

plants you shouldn't eat, you know,

23:51

like. Yeah. No, I'm, I completely

23:53

following you. Or it looks like

23:56

something that you would pick up

23:58

in Eldon Ring. and not quite

24:00

understand the purpose of. Yeah, absolutely.

24:03

You'd be like, oh, this is

24:05

for some potion I'm never gonna

24:07

make. Yeah. I'm confused because I

24:10

have this image of a koala's

24:12

penis, but then another penis that

24:14

allegedly is a koala penis that

24:17

looks completely different. Oh, no, this

24:19

is the four-headed one. That's an

24:21

echidness penis. Yeah. It kind of

24:24

looks like a foot. Yeah. Stoddling?

24:26

Oh yeah, they have like a,

24:28

yeah, like little, like their feet

24:31

kind of look like, um, uh,

24:33

sorry, their penis has looked like

24:35

bird feet, kind of, a little

24:38

bit. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's

24:40

nice. I like that for you.

24:42

And I'm glad you're able to

24:45

find joy. What do you think's

24:47

better? The Akidna penis or the

24:49

koala penis? Better, I think. the

24:52

Akidna penis. Really? Yeah, because the

24:54

koala one, I'm like, if I

24:56

see an Akidna's penis, I'm kind

24:59

of like, well, he's, he's not

25:01

interested in me, but if I

25:03

see a koala, I'm like, oh,

25:06

you're a little bit more guy-shaped.

25:08

I hope that's not for me,

25:10

buddy. The koala, like, yeah. I

25:13

get that. If a koala was

25:15

larger, it could be demonic, for

25:17

sure. I was just going to

25:20

say, I think that's sometimes about,

25:22

you know how like in the

25:24

90s and early 2000s, somebody having

25:27

sex with a gorilla was like

25:29

a prominent plot point in a

25:31

comedy movie, like it came up

25:34

relatively often. I have literally no

25:36

idea what the fuck you were

25:38

talking about. In the like late

25:41

90s to early 2000s, if there

25:43

was a movie that featured like

25:45

a gorilla or a bear, a

25:48

pander often. A gag would be

25:50

that the bad animals. Yeah, like

25:52

a guy shaped animal. The gag

25:55

would be that the bad guy

25:57

often, you know. you know, why

25:59

he didn't want, had sex with

26:02

the gorilla at the end of

26:04

the movie. George in the jungle

26:06

does this, I think Ace Ventura

26:09

does this too. Oh yeah, that's... It

26:11

came up, I don't know why, but

26:13

then I remembered reading somewhere that

26:16

guerrillas have a minute penis,

26:18

and I think that brings

26:20

you me a little level

26:22

of comfort, you know. If I'm ever

26:24

a poacher in a 90s movie, the

26:26

fact that the gorilla's penis is so

26:28

small brings me some level of comfort.

26:30

Just in case you feel like you want

26:32

to have sex with it, yeah. Yeah. Or the

26:35

gorilla feels like it wants to

26:37

have sex with me. Yeah, well, if

26:39

the gorilla decides it, then it's

26:41

happening. There's no, there's no

26:44

question. Out of my hands

26:46

at that point. Well, well,

26:48

congratulations to both of you

26:50

for crafting the world's worst

26:52

conversation. I think we're going to

26:54

go ahead and go to, oh

26:56

no, go ahead Demi. I just

26:59

sort of just say something else

27:01

about guerrillas. Tell me that guerrillas,

27:03

specifically like silverbacks, like the

27:05

big male guerrillas, really don't

27:08

like getting their hair wet.

27:10

So there's a bunch of videos

27:12

of guerrillas really cutely, like one

27:14

that I saw was a big,

27:16

he was holding a huge handful

27:18

of hay and running because it

27:20

started raining and he had a

27:22

hay. That's so funny. Apparently they

27:24

just really don't like it. Who does?

27:26

Well, yeah, that's true. Yeah, fair enough. They

27:29

can't like take off their clothes to

27:31

wait further. Yeah, for real. We should

27:33

give them some clothes. We should give

27:35

girls some clothes and cigarettes too.

27:37

Yeah, well, we've got enough over

27:39

here. We should

27:41

start a

27:44

charity where

27:47

we give

27:49

blue jeans

27:52

to all

27:54

the animals

27:57

at the zoo.

27:59

like to do all the lizards

28:01

as well. Tiny little Levi's for the

28:04

lizards. I think that's revealing a little.

28:06

You go ahead. I insist. I was

28:08

just gonna say I think a little

28:11

paradigm cutoffs would look great on like

28:13

a bearded dragon. I think that would

28:15

be a really perfect fit. Yeah. And

28:18

then you've got some of the lizards

28:20

that like you know because most of

28:22

them they're gonna be on their bellies

28:25

most of the time but you do

28:27

have those lizards that sometimes get up

28:29

on their legs. Oh man, a frilled

28:32

neck lizard with just a, yeah, some

28:34

denim cutoffs. Oh yes. With the pockets

28:36

kind of hanging out, Daisy Duke style.

28:39

Yes, 100% That's a fucking awesome look.

28:41

Giving away a little bit of my

28:43

own activities here off of the podcast,

28:46

but I did last night, Demi was

28:48

there as well, of course, but I

28:50

did use the TV to access some.

28:53

I just typed in the words funny

28:55

camel compilation, which is really good. There's

28:57

some good stuff out there. A lot

29:00

of it is the cows just fucking

29:02

really hurting people. They're beasts. They're so

29:04

big. There was one where we're a

29:07

camel completely UFO machined a guy by

29:09

the head. She's like bitter and then

29:11

went like grabbed him by the shoulder

29:14

and threw him because the guy was

29:16

like messing with the camel bothering it.

29:18

And the camel's just trying to mind

29:21

its own business. So he swallowed his

29:23

whole head. But anyways, the thing that

29:25

stood out for me there that is

29:28

like the image that I will take

29:30

with me was a guy like. starting

29:32

a video on like a pair of

29:35

added-ass sweatpants and then pulling out to

29:37

reveal that he'd put them on his

29:39

camel. The camel running around with sweatpants

29:42

on its front legs only and it

29:44

just like having this moment where it

29:46

reframed your understanding of the camel and

29:49

you were like yeah that's a that's

29:51

a human man. Yeah we both was

29:53

like at the same time basically were

29:56

like it actually looks pretty cool. It

29:58

actually looks pretty cool. It looks really

30:00

good. Impressing me. Yeah. I always remember

30:03

Zamid, I think, telling the story about

30:05

watching a guy, I forget where, but

30:07

it might have been somewhere in India,

30:09

and the guy was smoking cigarettes and

30:11

he would do one puff for him

30:13

and one puff for the camel. That's

30:15

so awesome. I think about that all

30:18

the time. And the camel loved it,

30:20

apparently, which I mean, of course it

30:22

would. It's just an animal addict. It's

30:24

completely real. You don't come up with

30:26

an idea like Joe camel just out of a blue

30:28

man. It has to be based out of a blue

30:30

man. give them a go you know I always I

30:33

think it does make like if I had to

30:35

pick an animal in the animal kingdom to

30:37

smoke cigarettes camel would be the first one

30:39

I'd think of they look like they'd like

30:41

smoking cigarettes it feels like that's the only

30:43

thing that would bring them over to our

30:45

side is like we wouldn't be able to

30:47

domesticate them but we would be able to

30:50

establish that hey we can light these things

30:52

so much easier than you and we make

30:54

them until you seize the means of production

30:56

it's in our best interest to work together.

30:58

Yeah there's really no way to if until

31:00

we create specifically a lighter or a match

31:02

that you can use you need us. And

31:04

that's not an amazing interest because we wouldn't write

31:07

you guys. And I would never do that. I'm

31:09

not going to give a cigarette to

31:11

a lion. That's like, that wouldn't even,

31:13

that's stupid. That wouldn't look so, it

31:15

wouldn't even look cute, it would look scary.

31:17

I don't need a line to have a

31:19

cigarette. I agree. And I also think on

31:21

some level you think the line doesn't get

31:23

it. Like he doesn't understand what's

31:26

happening, but the camel understands it's

31:28

smoking a cigarette. Yeah. It gets

31:30

it somehow. I think part of that

31:32

is because the camel has like cheeks.

31:34

Like, I think more so than the

31:36

lion? Does that make sense? Part of

31:38

it is that, I think another part

31:40

of it is, you get the feeling

31:42

that the camel already smells like an

31:44

uncle. So this is just kind of

31:46

underlining that fact. Like, he already has

31:48

that musk to him. They're like, oh,

31:50

I can't linger in this hug too

31:53

long. Exactly, the shed type of uncle.

31:55

Yeah. He already looks like he smells

31:57

like he's waiting for cigarettes for a

31:59

night. It's so tragic how many

32:01

camels lived and died before the

32:04

cigarette was invented. It was like

32:06

a glove waiting for a hand.

32:08

Well let's gang, we're gonna go

32:11

ahead and take a quick break

32:13

here. Jackson, we're going to serve

32:15

our listeners an ad, which of

32:18

course they'll cherish. And stay away

32:20

from that skip for 30 seconds

32:22

thing. Yeah. Because ACAST only ever

32:25

gives you the best possible ads.

32:27

Unless. Unless, of course, you get

32:29

told to join the army and

32:32

what have you. But hey, have

32:34

fun in there. I'll be back

32:36

in Monday. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

32:39

And we'll see you too. We'll

32:41

see you soon. Listeners too. Goodbye.

32:43

Hey everybody, welcome back to big

32:46

soft t.d.p.g. after that horrible ad

32:48

I just realized my crazy little

32:50

ass hadn't been recording the video.

32:53

Now, sure, are there some extenuating

32:55

circumstances? Absolutely. And also, Demi has

32:57

left the room because she was

33:00

about to throw up again. So

33:02

who knows what's going on there,

33:04

but I have added a video

33:07

feed of norm sitting in a

33:09

chair. Because he's currently in here

33:11

in the background. And we're of

33:14

course back with Jackson Bailey from

33:16

D&D is for nodes among other

33:18

podcasting things. And hmm, trying to

33:21

think if there's anything else I

33:23

should add from Philip Island. That's

33:25

right. That's where I'm from from

33:28

Philip Island to your ears listener.

33:30

Now Jackson to business. To business.

33:32

Okay, let's yeah, let's get down

33:35

to Bross tax. Yes, I was

33:37

just thinking that I wanted to

33:39

get into the browser. Now you

33:42

came on this podcast with one

33:44

goal and one goal only. That's

33:46

true. This was not merely a

33:49

social visit. It's the personal and

33:51

professional game. Yeah, exactly. It's transactional.

33:53

It's tran- yeah, this is an

33:56

entirely transactional podcast moment. No, I'm

33:58

here to promote, to talk about

34:00

the board game that myself, Joel

34:03

Zammett, Adam Carnavale, have been working

34:05

on for like the last seven

34:07

years, which we are... Mere moments

34:10

away from finally launching on our

34:12

Kickstarter, which you can follow If

34:14

you get Kickstarter slash Jared's outpost,

34:17

I think Yeah, yeah, I'm looking

34:19

at it here now and you

34:22

can absolutely find that by going

34:24

to Kickstarter.com/projects slash D&D nerds slash

34:26

Jared's hyphen outpost Oh, beautiful. Thank

34:29

God, you had it. Um, we've

34:31

not, it's not launched yet. In

34:33

many, in many ways, just Google,

34:36

Jared's our post, Kickstarter. Yeah, you're

34:38

other than, and then the AI

34:40

summary will, of course, kick in

34:43

and it'll take you there, along

34:45

with it, telling you that Jared

34:47

was a guy who died in

34:50

2019 and Benghazi or whatever, whatever,

34:52

whatever, whatever fucking shit it hallucinates,

34:54

D&D. for nerds which is like

34:57

a real play D&D podcast and

34:59

we people loved it and like

35:01

in like I don't know freaking

35:04

2015 or 16 we were like

35:06

oh we should make a board

35:08

game of that and then we've

35:11

just inch by inexorable inch been

35:13

working on it over the last

35:15

six years and it's finally god

35:18

damn finished and it's very good

35:20

so we want to get eyeballs

35:22

on it Yeah, so we, uh,

35:25

we, yeah, we've got the kickstarter.

35:27

We're trying to hit, we're trying

35:29

to get a thousand people following

35:32

it before we launch it. Wow.

35:34

If you want it, you want

35:36

to just get in there and

35:39

give it a little follow. You'd

35:41

be doing me personally, Jackson Baby,

35:43

I mean Bailey, a favor. That

35:46

is really fucking bad, dude. Yeah.

35:48

That's not much coming back from

35:50

that. Jared's outpost of course and

35:53

I'm just I'm just mercy killing

35:55

it I'm moving on John Zappos,

35:57

it's a chaotic board game full

36:00

of funny quests and quirky characters

36:02

based on the award-winning D&D as

36:04

for nerds podcast. Now I'm gonna

36:07

put you on the hot seat

36:09

here. I don't, we don't give

36:11

out sponsored content willy or nearly.

36:14

Oh no, okay. You say award-winning

36:16

podcast. Yes. Obviously everyone's mind goes,

36:18

well that has to be the

36:21

best podcast around. Only the good

36:23

podcast win awards. And of course

36:25

every podcast award matters and isn't

36:28

just collecting. thing in the world

36:30

absolutely incredibly real and

36:33

the fact that I mean it's

36:35

an undersell that they charge you

36:37

$300 to enter the running for

36:39

them often so what podcast

36:41

award has D&D is for

36:44

nerds won that's a great

36:46

question now can I remember what

36:48

award we've won here's the

36:50

thing We've been calling ourselves

36:52

award-winning in various sources for

36:54

a long time, so I

36:57

believe it to be true.

36:59

But do I currently possess in

37:01

my great meaty hands the

37:03

exact award we won? No. I've

37:05

got great news. The AI overview

37:07

has come in clutch for

37:09

D&D is for nerds awards.

37:12

The D&D is for nerds

37:14

awards are given to the

37:16

best Dungeons and Dragons content.

37:18

Awesome. The awards are given

37:21

out by the award-winning D&D

37:23

is for nerds podcast. So

37:25

hopefully that kind of... I

37:28

don't want to give ourselves.

37:30

Yeah. It's actually awards that

37:32

you run. Congratulations. Thank you

37:34

so much. Still counts. You

37:36

can still say award-winning even

37:38

if you gave yourself the

37:40

award. A baffling summary. I

37:42

am seeing that you got

37:44

nominated for People's Choice Podcast

37:46

Awards twice. Uh, what's the

37:49

only categories? Best comedy

37:51

podcast at some point. I

37:53

mean, it's a different podcast,

37:55

but we did win it.

37:57

Different podcast, exactly the same

37:59

people. I'm seeing, if I Google

38:01

D.D. is for Nurds Awards, I'm

38:03

seeing D.D. is for Nurds on

38:06

Audible, which says, listen to this

38:08

award-winning podcast, and which again doesn't

38:10

say what the awards are. It

38:12

must be true. It must be

38:14

true. It's written everywhere. I mean,

38:17

yeah, why would they lie about

38:19

it? Sandspan's radio dot com. Yeah,

38:21

is there any way to find

38:23

out what award this is won

38:25

before we move on with this?

38:28

Beyond messaging, Joel Zamid himself and

38:30

saying what award did they win?

38:32

We'll never know. What does it

38:35

say here? I'm trying to find

38:37

something by saying like D&D is

38:39

for nerds and then searching for

38:41

best as well. Yeah, okay. Oh,

38:43

that's a good idea. Hmm. According

38:45

to IMDB, we don't have any

38:47

awards for this title yet, but

38:49

that can't be true. No, you've

38:51

been nomin- well, yeah, why else

38:53

would you say it? But you've

38:55

been nominated twice. It would be

38:58

crazy for us to say we

39:00

were an award-winning podcast if we

39:02

never won an award. That would

39:04

be absurd. I have to be

39:06

honest with you Jackson. I brought

39:08

this up thinking that it was

39:10

going to be easily solved. And

39:12

I did not intend for this

39:14

to be a genuine moment of

39:16

gotcha journalism, but I can't find

39:19

any citation of the actual award

39:21

that you won. That's so funny.

39:23

I've been got you'd I've been

39:25

got you'd like a message zamet

39:27

and say Hey, hey, what award

39:29

did D&D for nerds actually win?

39:31

Yeah, see if he's got an

39:33

answer. Okay. Hopefully that'll come through

39:35

with an idea. I'm sure there's

39:37

got to be one somewhere. I

39:39

mean surely it's been going for

39:42

For like six, seven years we've

39:44

been saying award winning. So, it's

39:46

about to be an award somewhere.

39:48

Some of our long history. And

39:50

the great thing is. Even when

39:52

we find out what award it

39:54

is, it's going to suck. Yeah,

39:56

it's not going to be anything

39:58

worthwhile. It's not going to be

40:00

like, it'll be like some dinky

40:02

podcast award ceremonies set up in

40:05

like 2014 by a bunch of

40:07

podcasts that no longer exist. Oh,

40:09

how strange, actually, that's kind of

40:11

cool. We won the, uh, daytime

40:13

Emmy, it says here. I guess

40:15

they were really asleep at the

40:17

wheel on that one. Yeah, I

40:19

don't remember that, but I don't

40:21

remember that, but I mean if

40:23

it's, if that's, if that's what

40:26

it says, if that's what it

40:28

says, if that's what it says,

40:30

if that's what it says, if

40:32

that's what it says, if that's

40:34

what it says, if that's what

40:36

it says, if that's what it

40:38

says, if that's what it says,

40:40

if that's what it says, if

40:42

that's what it says. I'm looking

40:44

at 2019 podcast awards winners and

40:46

yep you were nominated for games

40:49

and hobbies but you did not

40:51

win. That's what that's what's coming

40:53

up at the podcast awards the

40:55

people's choice. Maybe they're like being

40:57

nominated for an awards just as

40:59

good as winning one. It's practically

41:01

identical. It's practically the same thing.

41:03

It's basically the same thing. It's

41:05

basically the same thing. It's basically

41:07

the same thing. It's basically the

41:10

same thing. It's basically the same

41:12

thing. It's basically the same thing.

41:14

And I'm looking at, I've got

41:16

2023 here, you did not win

41:18

in 2023. No, it will a

41:20

bit older than 2023. Let me

41:22

tell you. Okay, well maybe, okay,

41:24

2016, no results. Okay. Do we

41:26

have like even, even a, no,

41:28

2017, that's a big no from.

41:30

2016 was when Plummy the Death

41:33

Star won. So, did we also

41:35

win for D&D's for Nudes in

41:37

like? in like some kind of

41:39

like different cat because we won

41:41

for comedy for Plummy the Death

41:43

Star. So maybe for one of

41:45

the other ones we won something

41:47

else. Maybe. I mean you, hey,

41:49

you must have. Why else would

41:51

it be there? You would almost

41:54

think. How could it possibly be

41:56

there if it wasn't? Okay, I've

41:58

tagged I've tagged Joel and he's

42:00

he's not going to see that

42:02

of course because he wasn't Ready,

42:04

oh no, he's got, he's hopefully

42:06

will be. I'm actually gonna see

42:08

if I have his number and

42:10

if I can call him on

42:12

the phone. This is getting to

42:14

this point where I'm like, this

42:17

is true journalism right here. And

42:19

then will he know it? I

42:21

don't know. I'm currently looking through.

42:23

I'm at the Podcast Awards People's

42:25

Choice. Maybe it wasn't People's Choice.

42:27

And I'm looking through it. I

42:29

don't want to, I don't want

42:31

to, like, shit on you here.

42:33

I don't think it was People's

42:35

Choice. No, no, no, no. I

42:38

think you're right. No, you're right.

42:40

Great podcast, but like, that's going

42:42

to go to, like, the, and

42:44

influence a podcast, right? Yes, oh,

42:46

absolutely. Huh? Now I just need

42:48

to know. I'm calling him on

42:50

Facebook Messenger, which, you know, nobody

42:52

in the world is ever going

42:54

to pick up on that. Maybe

42:56

he'll pick up if you call

42:58

him on his cell phone? Drake?

43:01

Maybe. Oh, I actually don't know

43:03

if I have Zamit's actual cell

43:05

phone number. This whole thing is

43:07

falling apart. I think so rarely

43:09

do we contact each other that

43:11

way that I actually know I

43:13

don't have it. I remember looking

43:15

for it recently and not finding

43:17

it. Yeah. I think it's now

43:19

getting to the point where I'm

43:22

like I need to know what

43:24

it is. I'm gonna message Adam,

43:26

the other one of the other

43:28

members of the podcast, the DM,

43:30

because if anyone's gonna know what

43:32

the award is, it might be

43:34

the guy who like writes the

43:36

adventures, right? You would think so.

43:39

What award did D&D is

43:41

for Nurd's win? Having trouble

43:43

finding it and trying to

43:46

plug the Kickstarter on our

43:48

podcast. This could be really

43:50

bad for you if we

43:52

can't. Find the award. The

43:54

award. Okay, there we go.

43:57

That's good. And that's going

43:59

to put a great deal

44:01

of fear in him too,

44:03

which I like. Yes. It's

44:05

good to think of him

44:08

receiving like a text like

44:10

that and going, oh, oh

44:12

no. And then panicking and

44:14

doing the same searching we

44:17

are. I think it's lost

44:19

to the annals of time

44:21

personally. It might be. I'll,

44:23

I'll give you that. Tragically.

44:25

I think it might be.

44:28

Yeah, Ed is a shame.

44:30

Rest in peace. Whatever award

44:32

we won. It's gone. It's

44:34

like tears in the rain,

44:36

you know? Yeah, like tears

44:39

in a rain. Tears in

44:41

a rain indeed. D&D is

44:43

for nerds. Now I'm checking

44:45

for the Audioverse Awards, all

44:47

right? Oh my God. Okay,

44:50

you got a 2021 showcase

44:52

on the Audioverse Awards. Don't

44:54

know what that is. It

44:56

seems to be... A podcast

44:59

available exclusively on Amazon. I

45:01

just got a message from

45:03

Adam saying, I'm trying to

45:05

find it now. That's so

45:07

funny. Oh, no. Okay. Well,

45:10

why don't we... I fear...

45:12

Okay. And Adam says, I

45:14

fear it might have been

45:16

plumbing the Death Star that

45:18

won, unfortunately. Maybe at some

45:21

point in our storied past

45:23

we got confused. I think

45:25

that that's almost certainly what

45:27

happened. Yes, you might be

45:29

right. That's very funny if

45:32

that's the case. That rocks.

45:34

But also, like, the thing

45:36

is that there was this,

45:38

I feel like this boom

45:41

in like 2015 of a

45:43

bunch of places doing podcast

45:45

awards. Yes, and all of

45:47

those would have disappeared by

45:49

now, right? Yes, absolutely. Oh

45:52

my god, Zad has gotten

45:54

back to me. He says

45:56

it's the best of iTunes.

45:58

There we go. there we

46:00

go and obviously this

46:03

is going to happen

46:05

but what the fuck

46:07

is the best of

46:10

iTunes okay apparently oh

46:12

no well I've just I've

46:14

just searched best of

46:17

iTunes D&D is for

46:19

nerds and it brings

46:21

up a post of Yep,

46:25

it's it brings up

46:27

Zamit posting on someone

46:29

asking for recommendations of

46:32

what to listen to

46:34

after they've finished listening

46:36

to the adventure zone.

46:38

Oh, that's so funny. Nine years

46:40

ago. That's so funny. Yeah.

46:43

So season one got featured as

46:45

best of iTunes in Australia.

46:47

There you go. Hey, we found

46:50

it in the end. We did.

46:52

We got there. In a way,

46:54

I'm so glad that there was

46:57

an actual award that we did

46:59

win. Now, and I will push

47:01

back on the idea that this

47:04

was an award. This sounds like

47:06

a list of calls. I think

47:09

it counts as an award. They

47:11

awarded us, Tom, best of iTunes.

47:13

They said, Dean D is for

47:16

nodes, we award you best of

47:18

iTunes. Congratulations. The first season of

47:20

D&D is for Nurds got listened

47:23

under the best of iTunes.

47:25

Congratulations D&D is for

47:28

Nurds. Yeah, no, a late

47:30

appointed, but congratulations D&D for

47:32

Dias for Nurds for the

47:35

award-winning feature of being listed

47:37

under best of iTunes. I

47:39

cannot emphasize enough how

47:42

much I didn't think this

47:44

was going to take up

47:46

this much of... So Jared's

47:49

out. Yes. Oh, I've got

47:51

a headache. Jared's out. No,

47:54

I wanted to, well, I

47:56

also wanted to just shout

47:59

out. The D&D is for Nurds,

48:01

of course, a board game on Kickstarter

48:03

is not a novel idea. These have

48:06

been made dozens and dozens of times.

48:08

Here we have your Kickstarter, which is

48:10

Jarin's outpost, launching soon, but I did

48:12

notice that under here, it does say

48:15

first created for D&D is for Nurds,

48:17

this is the first project being created

48:19

by D&D for Nurds, but there are

48:21

23. projects, which I thought was interesting.

48:24

Well, yeah, yeah, Zamid, I mean, he's

48:26

in control of that Kickstarter account. And

48:28

I think he just, he, hey, the

48:31

thing about Joe Zamid is that he

48:33

has missed the board games. He loves

48:35

board games. He's got a board game

48:37

brain. And so the amount of board

48:40

games we played, kind of, some just

48:42

back in the day is like social

48:44

fun, but also to like, kind of

48:46

get a sense of what's out there

48:49

that came from like backing a bunch

48:51

of a bunch of projects. was yeah

48:53

it's all by his hand he's got

48:55

that real you know like the kind

48:58

of person you play a board game

49:00

with and you know you're gonna lose

49:02

it's kind of a race to second

49:05

that's what playing a board game with

49:07

Sam it is like he's gotten it

49:09

in his brain he knows like when

49:11

the right time is to pivot to

49:14

a victory point the same way that

49:16

like your body knows how to catch

49:18

a ball you know like it just

49:20

has that instinctive knowledge yeah And so

49:23

he's got that kind of brain and

49:25

I have the exact opposite and I

49:27

think you need those two kinds of

49:30

brains to make a board game that

49:32

everyone's gonna like Yeah because Zamid'll be

49:34

like what about this kind of complicated

49:36

but interesting mechanic that we could do

49:39

and you could use it to do

49:41

this and that and then I'm like

49:43

I don't know what the hell you're

49:45

talking about when I start playing a

49:48

board game my brain shuts off Yeah,

49:50

and that's a kind of player you

49:52

know what I mean the The friend

49:55

of the board game owner is an

49:57

essential part of the board game playing

49:59

demographic. The guy who doesn't actually want

50:01

to play board games, but he doesn't

50:04

know how to hang out with you

50:06

otherwise. And this is perfect. keeping him

50:08

in check. So Janzapost is going to

50:10

be great for that. Exactly, absolutely. Welcome

50:13

back everybody. We just had some of

50:15

the most inscrutable technical difficulties you can

50:17

have on a podcast. I'm so happy

50:19

to be out of them. So I

50:22

can go back to grilling Jackson about

50:24

the provenance of his Dungeons and Dragons

50:26

podcast. This has, it's become a sort

50:29

of Frost v Nixon situation I'm experiencing

50:31

right now. That's right, but and I'm

50:33

Nick's. As I remember it, Nixon did

50:35

manage to get through things without his

50:38

mic producing any strange popping noises or

50:40

Like failing to be picked up by

50:42

multiple programs at once. Just one of

50:44

the many in his foster periods. Okay.

50:47

Your mic keeps cutting out. All right.

50:49

Well, I just wanted to, the other

50:51

thing I wanted to say was, obviously

50:54

there's a lot of wonderful, of course

50:56

I'm accepting all on Kickstarter having access

50:58

to my cookies. Yeah. Only person I

51:00

want to have more access to my

51:03

cookies. Santa Claus himself. Kickstarter is kind

51:05

of like in that it gives me

51:07

wonderful gifts every year. In many ways.

51:09

Yeah, many ways. Here I was looking

51:12

at just some of the things that

51:14

Joel Zama kick-started. Everdale duo, Humblewood Tales,

51:16

Injuries and Vile Deeds. So he's buying

51:18

ways for people to get hurt, which

51:21

isn't okay to me. Yeah. I think

51:23

that's dope. I think he buys some

51:25

for Adam Carnavale so that he might

51:28

run a better D&D. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

51:30

Kind of throwing a dog a bone

51:32

there, but also I did see that

51:34

he backed the super color charging slash

51:37

data cables redesigned, which are of course

51:39

form function and irresistible fidgeting all in

51:41

a one-of-a-kind magnetic charging slash data cable.

51:45

Well, I think I know the

51:47

cables that he backed yes, I

51:50

I messaged him now I messaged

51:52

him just before Hey, do you

51:54

like those cables you kick-started and

51:56

he said and I quote Mm-hmm.

51:59

He said... Yeah, we still use

52:01

them. Oh, yeah, there it is.

52:03

And the cats do like to

52:05

bite them, but cannot say if

52:08

it is more than less than

52:10

other chords. So, wow, that's just...

52:12

Yeah. It's good to see that

52:14

there can be some incredible wins

52:17

on Kickstart. Now, of course, this

52:19

isn't necessarily award winning, but... No!

52:21

That doesn't even matter if you

52:23

won or didn't win the award.

52:26

It's meetingless, really. It seems to

52:28

be completely meaningless. But we do,

52:30

and I wonder if that is

52:32

grounds for me to click the

52:34

report, this project, a Kickstarter button

52:37

on D&D is for no, surely.

52:39

That would be, truly, I don't

52:41

know what that would do for

52:43

our friendship. I think it would

52:46

be you would just have to

52:48

laugh, you know, it would be

52:50

very bad. It would be very

52:52

bad. Oh, irascible Tom Walker. Yeah,

52:55

I don't think I can get

52:57

away with that one. But Jones

52:59

Outpost, a chaotic board game full

53:01

of funny quests and quirky characters

53:04

based on the award-winning D&D. Based

53:06

on the D&D is for nerds

53:08

podcast. Is going live soon and

53:10

you want to get those followers

53:13

out there. We're launching the kicks

53:15

out of very... This has been

53:17

a massive labor labor of love.

53:19

You know, to go for a

53:21

second. For a second. You know,

53:24

this is something we've put like

53:26

a great deal of time in.

53:28

A fantastic board game. We played

53:30

with people who don't even like

53:33

us. And they've had a great

53:35

time. So you know how this

53:37

is going. You did not get

53:39

the word earnest out without it

53:42

being clipped into two parts by

53:44

some kind of audio glitch. What

53:46

they got? Alright, look, let's just,

53:48

maybe I'm just gonna power through

53:51

selling this and board game before

53:53

my computer overheats and shuts down

53:55

again at the very beginning. Yes!

53:57

Oh my god, I forgot that

54:00

your computer just fucking shut down

54:02

before we started recording. It's a

54:04

good computer. It's acting like this.

54:06

Yeah, look, I think, hey, maybe

54:08

we can just say that everyone

54:11

should check out Jared's outpost. Are

54:13

there any board games you can

54:15

like think of that this draws

54:17

on or any like sizzle that

54:20

you can put there for the

54:22

nerds who are board game freaks.

54:24

Yeah. So this, what makes this board

54:26

game very unique is that it's

54:28

like so many other board games

54:30

you'll play. I know I'm probably

54:32

clipping like crazy rights to power

54:35

through. We've had the struggle where

54:37

people have asked the same question

54:39

with marketing and promoting it. What's it

54:41

like? And it's just kind of not

54:43

like many other board. It's one of

54:45

those games that's like deceptively simple to learn

54:47

but it requires so much out-of-the-box thinking and

54:49

you end up coming up with these strategies

54:51

to kind of like win the game or

54:53

complete the little tasks that you have to

54:56

do in the game that think would work

54:58

but obviously within the rules of the game

55:00

it does work something that I think is

55:02

really amazing about. that one of my favorite

55:04

things in like a video game is when

55:06

it's designed in such a way that it

55:08

will result in a bunch of emergent gameplay

55:10

where you'll get like a bunch of little

55:12

stories out of the particular like the rules

55:14

and the mechanics of the game and no

55:16

two games are the same because so much of

55:18

it is randomized that you will just end up

55:21

with kind of complete narratives happening based on the

55:23

way you play and the things you do because

55:25

that's also a massive part of the game is

55:27

trying to you know this mentality of this

55:29

philosophy with it where if you can't

55:32

beat if you can't win and you

55:34

realize you're not going to be able

55:36

to get enough prestige points to win

55:38

your goal and the game is you

55:40

know designed so you can do this

55:43

is to fuck over your friends as

55:45

much as possible kind of wreck their

55:47

day it has a little bit you know

55:49

like in a board game where

55:51

somebody move and it kind of

55:53

upsets everyone at the table it's

55:56

kind of designed around that mentality.

55:58

that someone did that upset

56:00

everyone at the table but

56:02

I think I get Jackson

56:04

can I can I can

56:06

I just say I think

56:08

this is And this is

56:10

typically, this is not sponsored

56:12

content. This is our friends

56:14

coming on the show as

56:16

an opportunity just to like

56:18

plug the thing that they

56:20

have worked really harder than

56:22

they like. Yeah. I think

56:24

we are going to have

56:26

to do the first ever

56:28

non-contractual make good episode of

56:30

a podcast where we get

56:32

you and Sam. We get

56:34

you in a different location.

56:36

Yes. This is going live.

56:38

Don't get me wrong. This

56:40

is going live still. But

56:42

when the Kickstarter launches, we

56:44

have to do this. Oh

56:46

God. Yeah. That sounds like

56:48

a good idea. Call this

56:50

a prototype. You know, this

56:52

is our first to tap.

56:55

Yes, absolutely. We can only

56:57

improve. The page isn't even

56:59

live now. It's just launching

57:01

soon. Exactly, exactly. So when

57:03

it does launch, I'll be

57:05

back. We will not have

57:07

any of these technical problems.

57:09

This is, not only do

57:11

you have technical problems, my

57:13

wife had to leave the

57:15

recording because she's, she threw

57:17

up earlier from thinking about

57:19

a guy licking a dirty

57:21

sock and talking about how

57:23

much she liked it. And

57:25

now she's in the next

57:27

room laying down in the

57:29

dark. I want to say

57:31

interesting stuff over the years.

57:33

I think this might be

57:35

the worst podcast episode either

57:37

of us have ever been

57:39

involved with. I think you're

57:41

right. I think in a

57:43

way this magnum opus of

57:45

terrible content we've made. And

57:47

I assume I'm cutting out

57:49

saying all of this. Yes,

57:51

you are. You know what?

57:53

Watch out best of iTunes.

57:55

The Kings are coming back.

57:57

Get ready to play host

57:59

to Jackson Bailey again. Oh

58:01

my god. All right. Oh,

58:03

that's good stuff. Oh, I

58:05

think that's where I'll leave

58:07

the recording. Thank you everybody

58:09

for joining me for this

58:11

episode of Big Soft TV.P&G.

58:13

Thank you Jackson. Over on

58:15

Instagram, I believe your old

58:17

dogs are dead. Yes, I

58:20

think. Dad on Twitter and

58:22

Hams for ever on Instagram.

58:24

My apologies. No, hey, that's

58:26

okay. Neither of them are

58:28

my name. So, you know.

58:30

Yes, you're right. Yeah, you

58:32

are. Very easy to get

58:34

confused. Mm-hmm. Oh, God. Yeah.

58:36

Oh, boy. Oh my God.

58:38

Dude, I can't believe we

58:40

used... You keep getting extremely

58:42

compressed as well? Yes. You

58:44

keep sounding like your robot.

58:46

No, I'm sounding completely insane

58:48

over there. I think your

58:50

internet is fucked. But also,

58:52

like, we used up all

58:54

the good internet at the

58:56

start just talking about you

58:58

going on holiday and seeing

59:00

a lady face fuck a

59:02

cow. We had our chance

59:04

to plug the game clean.

59:06

We should have started it.

59:08

We should have it. Yeah.

59:10

Hey. You live and learn

59:12

you live in blank indeed.

59:14

We'll see you later everybody

59:16

Thank you for tuning into

59:18

big soft tidied dot p&g

59:20

Check out the podcast patron

59:22

patron.com/big soft titty if you

59:24

want to catch any other

59:26

episodes and video of this

59:28

episode Which I've course forgot

59:30

to start at the very

59:32

beginning. That's right putting my

59:34

mouse over your window and

59:36

so the discord overlay keeps

59:38

popping up and I just

59:40

know that's gonna like get

59:43

some people fucking irate that

59:45

I keep doing this because

59:47

this has to be the

59:49

most cobbled together fucking set

59:51

up of all time all

59:53

right that's beautiful all right

59:55

thank you Jackson. Thanks for

59:57

having me. See you. Bye.

59:59

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1:01:01

live a good life? How much

1:01:03

do matter? health, relationships

1:01:05

matter? What about happiness, meaning, money

1:01:07

and love? What if you're ill

1:01:09

or anxious, These ill or in

1:01:11

pain? These are the questions we

1:01:13

explore weekly on Good Life Project podcast

1:01:15

hosted by me, award -winning author,

1:01:17

four -time industry founder and perpetual seeker.

1:01:20

Jonathan Fields. Every week, I

1:01:22

sit down with world -renowned

1:01:24

experts, iconic writers and researchers,

1:01:26

and while everyone from Olympic and

1:01:28

while everyone activists, A -list celebs,

1:01:31

musicians and more, all with

1:01:33

a single goal, to help

1:01:35

understand what it truly takes

1:01:37

to live a good life

1:01:39

and to feel a little

1:01:41

less alone along the way.

1:01:43

Listen to truly takes to live a you

1:01:45

get your podcasts. less alone along the

1:01:47

way. Listen to the Good Life Project podcast wherever you

1:01:49

get your podcasts. Acas.com