0:00

Today, Today, the beverage

0:02

aisle looks a lot different than

0:04

it used to. America's beverage companies

0:06

are working together. We're delivering the

0:09

options everyone wants. In fact, nearly

0:11

60% of beverages Americans buy have

0:13

zero sugar. You'll find more variety

0:15

than ever, including more of your

0:17

favorites, now available with zero sugar.

0:19

You'll also find more sizes and

0:21

clear calorie information on the front

0:23

of every can, bottle, bottle, and

0:25

pack. We know when it comes

0:27

to finding balance, the more choices

0:29

the more choices the better. Health

0:32

is here to help you

0:34

start your weight loss journey

0:36

with carrying personalized support. Meet

0:39

one-on-one with board-certified obesity doctors

0:41

and register dieticians who truly

0:43

listen and understand your unique

0:46

needs. Eligible patients can access

0:48

affordable GLP1 medications delivered right

0:50

to their door each month.

0:52

No insurance, no problem. Moichi

0:55

Health accepts FSA and HSA,

0:57

making care accessible and affordable.

0:59

and with 24-7 customer service,

1:02

you'll never feel alone on

1:04

your path to better health.

1:06

Get started with Moichi Health

1:08

today. Take the free quiz

1:10

at join moichi.com and use

1:12

code audio 40 at checkout

1:14

for $40 off your first

1:16

month of membership. That's join-o-c-h-i.com

1:19

with promo code audio 40. Hey,

1:29

so it's it. I know well, I just

1:31

wanted to take a moment to say

1:33

thank you to everybody who? Has liked

1:35

our show subscribe to our show left

1:38

comments raided it reviewed it listened

1:40

to it the first few episodes

1:42

have done very well and It

1:44

just makes us even more excited

1:46

to do more don't you think? Yeah, people

1:48

still want to hear his talk after

1:50

all these years But you know, it's funny

1:53

as I noticed a lot of people were

1:55

saying Can we get one of just you and tie

1:57

by yourselves again? I know, I notice that. I think that's

1:59

gonna end up... being the more popular ones.

2:01

Well I just figured I didn't want

2:04

I feel like people already know so

2:06

much about us so I was at all I

2:08

want to get guess right at first so

2:10

I wanted to like feel it out. I

2:12

thought that was funny though and then we're

2:14

thinking like they don't want to hear us

2:16

talk just me and you know but I

2:18

do have to say the ones that have

2:20

aired so far have been very fun and

2:22

you know I've learned a lot from the

2:24

people that we've done talking to you

2:26

know so it's been a journey but

2:28

exciting and I'm just really, I'm

2:31

so thankful for the support. So

2:33

if you're grateful. You know, if

2:35

you guys can continue to like

2:37

and subscribe to the show, listen

2:40

to the show, you can also

2:42

catch it on Patreon. The episode

2:44

always drops a week later on

2:46

Patreon where you can watch the

2:49

full video episode. Which I also

2:51

notice a lot of people

2:53

commenting saying like, where's the full

2:55

video? I wanna watch it. I

2:58

wanna watch. a podcast recording versus

3:00

just listening to it from audio.

3:02

So we're learning, we're still learning guys. Yeah,

3:05

we are. And yeah, uploading the page around

3:07

has been real fun. But, so I have

3:09

been commenting to people like on our

3:11

Tik Talks and all of that, like

3:13

hey, you can watch it here because

3:15

people have been curious about that too.

3:17

But I think, I think this week, I

3:19

know that you and I wanted to jump

3:22

into a little bit of. We've been

3:24

noticing comments of people bringing

3:26

up stuff in situations and

3:28

conversations that we've had in

3:30

the past. And like way past, like we

3:32

were young. Like kids. Still kids. Yeah, we

3:34

were young at all. I mean, we were, yeah, 17

3:36

years old. Yeah, or 18. Yeah, so. And I feel

3:39

like. But what do you feel like though? Do you

3:41

feel like, is there anything specific that

3:43

you're like listed? I really want

3:45

to like. I think the

3:47

number one thing to me

3:49

that bugs me the most

3:52

is when I see people

3:54

state like, oh, Tyler

3:56

and Kim forced Caitlin

3:59

in to this adoption.

4:01

And basically, basically what I get

4:03

from it is like they're saying

4:05

that I chose a man over my child

4:07

because I was too afraid that you were

4:09

going to leave. And then a lot

4:12

of people were pulling, like tagging me

4:14

in this Tiktok clip of a

4:16

conversation that we had on a hill,

4:18

I think we were like 18 years old.

4:20

And- Oh, when I was burned. your

4:22

fadora? Yo don't judge me for the fadora

4:24

guys it was a thing I don't know

4:26

it was a thing that it was it

4:29

man I mean it's fine yeah back on

4:31

the old two thousands but it was a

4:33

conversation you and I were having and you

4:35

asked you asked me could you ever have

4:37

any fears that I would leave you if

4:40

you were to make a different decision or

4:42

anything and so I started talking about

4:44

all of my fears and one of my

4:46

fears at that young age was like yes

4:49

I had a fear that if I was

4:51

going to parent that child and take

4:53

that baby home, that we would not

4:55

last forever and that we would break

4:57

up eventually as a couple. I think

4:59

what people are worried about though is

5:01

the wording. It was like, it was like

5:03

you said like, oh, I didn't want to

5:05

go against your decision or I was afraid

5:07

you were going to leave me if I

5:09

came home from the hospital. It wasn't

5:12

like, you know, so I get why people are

5:14

like saying this, I understand it.

5:16

when I was a child making

5:18

this decision for my child, I was

5:20

looking at statistics and people around

5:23

me. And all of the people

5:25

around me that had babies

5:27

at a young age, none of those

5:29

people were with the other person. Like,

5:31

look at even just, in general,

5:33

statistically, people that have

5:36

teen pregnancies, the couples

5:38

do not laugh. They break up.

5:40

It's very, very rare that people

5:42

will stay together after having

5:44

a child at a young age. So to say

5:46

if that was one of my fears, absolutely, that

5:49

I would mean you would end up not working

5:51

out and we would have to co-parent this child,

5:53

and yes, that was a fear of mine, I

5:55

didn't want my child to come into like a

5:57

broken home or end up being in a broken

6:00

home. because you and I both

6:02

experienced that too. But I think people,

6:04

yeah, they do twist it. It was like

6:06

the wording, and I get like watching,

6:08

I'm like, oh yeah, I understand

6:10

where you would get that perception

6:13

because that's what was said, but

6:15

it was more or less like I

6:17

was afraid you were going to leave

6:19

me eventually, you know what I mean?

6:21

You were going to, not that you're,

6:23

I'm going to leave you because of

6:25

if I don't do adoption, you know

6:27

what I mean? I mean, listen, we can't go back

6:29

in time and say what would have happened, but I

6:31

highly assume that we wouldn't have had the freedom to like

6:33

go to therapy at a young age. Everyone hated on us.

6:35

Remember this? When we were 17, and we were like,

6:37

what sort of therapy? My mom was like, you're an

6:40

idiot. I can't believe you're going to go to therapy.

6:42

You're only 17. What issues could you possibly have? I'm

6:44

like, well, I did just go through this adoption. Me

6:46

and my girlfriend, me and my girlfriend, my girlfriend, my

6:48

girlfriend, my girlfriend, or my girlfriend, you're,

6:50

you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're,

6:52

you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're,

6:54

you're, you're, you're, you're, Yeah, I think

6:56

you're right. I think we wouldn't have

6:59

been able to just emotionally and

7:01

mentally grow from all of just

7:03

not even the adoption trauma, but

7:05

just our whole childhood trauma. I mean,

7:07

we got a lot to go through. But I think

7:09

the thing that makes me angry, like two

7:12

things I would say that make me like

7:14

upset the most is that when people turn

7:16

around and say, oh, you know, you chose

7:18

Thai Thai force you to do this adoption

7:20

and his mom did, for one, I feel

7:22

like you're stripping me of the Sadness

7:24

and the hurt and the strength that

7:27

it took for me to hand over

7:29

my child that I so desperately wanted

7:32

to parent I would never be that

7:34

weak of a woman to choose a

7:36

man over any of my children Even

7:38

to this day if something were

7:40

to happen. I would be choosing my

7:42

children. You know what I mean? And

7:44

the other one is is that do people

7:46

not think that you wanted

7:48

this child? I mean honestly I

7:51

personally feel like people forget that

7:53

I even had like emotions like

7:55

yeah any attachment to it. They're like

7:57

oh you wanted it. That's all evil.

7:59

from the beginning and blah blah and it's

8:02

like they have no clue that me and

8:04

you flip-fopped on our decision both of

8:06

us said you wanted to parent I

8:08

was like whoa and then you wanted to

8:10

adoption I was like maybe I want a

8:12

parent because after you kind of the first

8:14

time that you kind of the first time that

8:16

you said the first time that you said you

8:19

said you wanted to parent that you kind

8:21

of the first time that you said you

8:23

wanted to parent I was behind the

8:25

scene that was behind the scenes behind

8:27

the scenes because they were behind But,

8:29

um, and so when that happened and you called me

8:31

and said that we're, you know, I want to do this,

8:33

I'm like, all right, like I, I buckled up. I was

8:35

ever going to Salvation Army Mom, I got to get all

8:37

this stuff. And I got to get all this stuff. And

8:39

what's your mom's saying? She was like, okay. Okay. And

8:42

she was like, okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

8:44

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

8:46

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. If that's what.

8:48

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. If that's what's what's what's

8:50

what's what's what's what's what's what's what's what's what's

8:52

what's what's what's what's what's what's what's what's what's

8:54

what's what's what's what's what okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

8:56

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay They

8:58

didn't really see the back and forth and

9:00

how hard it was to like be at

9:03

birth that and have to make this decision

9:05

too because at the end of day it

9:07

was like I could have wanted certain things

9:09

but you're carrying this baby I

9:11

have no control over this. Right. Or

9:14

you could have. So I mean. But that's

9:16

what mine like blows my mind is to

9:18

people first of all to think that I

9:20

would choose a man over my child. But

9:22

then again for them to just. Think that

9:24

you have no emotions or sadness or

9:26

sorrow or any want or that I

9:28

would give you some ultimatum? That's insane

9:30

That's sick. That is so disturbing and then

9:33

for me to continue to stay with you

9:35

over all these years and have other girls

9:37

Yeah, daughters, and I also I always say

9:39

if you guys really were to think

9:41

that that I'm that type of person

9:43

That's disgusting because I teach my girls

9:45

completely opposite you know what I mean, and

9:47

they know that like I would never stay

9:49

in a relationship and let my girls think

9:51

that that would be a normal healthy thing. But

9:53

I also noticed that the clip that they played

9:56

that you're talking about at Tech Talk, where we're

9:58

on the Hill talking, they didn't play the whole... clip

10:00

where I asked later on during that same

10:02

conversation I talk about what I was afraid

10:04

of and it was like we were

10:06

literally just talking about our fears if

10:08

we decide to parent yeah which honestly

10:11

producers asked us that all the time okay

10:13

remember we'd have situations but how do you

10:15

think this would be like you know if

10:18

Carly was here yeah so and then what

10:20

was that season four of the original so

10:22

I mean we were already kind of in

10:24

a nitty gritty a team on world but um

10:26

I think it's interesting that people

10:28

would even like because you've even addressed this

10:31

before and said multiple times and now I've

10:33

gotten to a point like my last time

10:35

addressing it if you think that I am

10:37

weak I guess then I guess believe whatever

10:39

you want yeah but I was telling one

10:41

of my friends the other day about the

10:43

situation and I said eventually just gets to the

10:45

point where I can say the truth and you

10:47

can either believe it or not and I sleep

10:49

good at night yeah I know my morals and

10:52

my values I know the person that I love

10:54

my care about right and that's all that matters

10:56

to me so it's like I'm the dressing it

10:58

constantly And so I'm just kind of

11:00

like, this is my last time addressing

11:02

it. I'm not a weak woman. I,

11:05

Tyler wanted this baby just as much

11:07

as I did. We both leaned on each other

11:09

so much through all of those emotions

11:11

and the sorrow and the back and

11:13

forth of planning, making an adoption

11:16

plan. And I think to go back to

11:18

like what you said to, or what we were

11:20

saying about how MTV didn't

11:22

document that time when we

11:24

flip flopped. And so yeah, like I called

11:26

Tyler and I was just like, And it

11:29

was getting close to her delivery. So we're getting

11:31

really anxious. And I was like, I don't think

11:33

I can do this, I can't do this, I

11:35

want to parent her. And he was on the

11:37

phone and he was just like, okay, if that's

11:39

what you want to do, we will do it.

11:41

Are you sure that's what you want to do?

11:43

You read the pros of cons, let's remember. And I

11:45

was just like, I want to do it. And also

11:47

what was not shown was not shown was, you know.

11:50

There was so it was a few weeks where I

11:52

was like, okay, I'm gonna parent this baby. That was

11:54

what it's gonna be Yeah, so we're doing and I

11:56

was getting things and my you know, my grandma was

11:58

sending things to the house for the baby and then

12:00

one day my mom and I got

12:02

new argument and she looked at

12:04

me and she said oh yeah well who's

12:07

gonna buy your daughter diapers when

12:09

she needs them and then off rip

12:11

and a snap I was like oh hell

12:13

no because I watched my grandmother

12:16

hold things over my mom's head

12:18

my whole entire life and in that

12:20

moment I was like I will

12:22

not have anybody look at me and

12:24

say that how is your child gonna

12:27

get diapers when that is one

12:29

of the Most necessity items of having

12:31

a child and when she was also preaching us

12:33

like she wouldn't like the adoption She wanted to

12:35

parent will help you will help you and then

12:37

I remember you call me you're saying like She

12:40

said she was gonna help us and she just

12:42

we got in one little argument. It wasn't that

12:44

bad. You said and she said well. Yeah. Well.

12:46

Good luck who's gonna buy your diapers and then

12:48

I'm being like oh my like so you're not

12:50

gonna help us like or you're only gonna help

12:52

us when it's You're eating it for you or holding it over

12:54

my head or whatever, yeah. And so in that moment, that's when I was

12:56

like, okay, no, never mind, I have to make this decision for her because

12:58

if not, my life, it's going to be things held over my head forever

13:00

and ever and ever and ever and ever. Never you call me and tell

13:02

me, all right, never mind, the adoption of that guy and I was like,

13:04

oh my God. And in that moment, you're, you know, you're thinking like, I'm going

13:07

to be a dad, I'm going to be a dad, we're going to be a dad,

13:09

we're going to be a dad, we're going to

13:11

be a dad, we're going to be a

13:13

dad, we're going to be a dad, we're

13:15

going to be a dad, we're going to

13:17

do this, we're going to do this, we're

13:20

going to do this, This new year, why

13:22

not let audible expand your life by listening?

13:24

Explore over 1 million audiobooks, podcasts, and exclusive

13:26

audible originals that will inspire and motivate you.

13:29

Tap into your well-being with advice and insight

13:31

from leading professionals and experts on better health,

13:33

relationships, career, finance, investing, and more. Maybe you

13:36

want to kick a bad habit or start

13:38

a good one. If you're interested in

13:40

learning how to master your emotions

13:42

and hearing scientifically backed advice for using

13:44

your emotions as a tool, may I

13:47

suggest shift by psychologist and bestseller

13:49

author Dr. Ethan Cross. Trust me, listening

13:51

on audible can help you reach

13:53

the goals you set for yourself. Start

13:55

listening today when you sign up for

13:58

a free 30-day trial at audible.

14:00

That's audible.com/wonder. So was

14:02

there any emotions for you

14:04

in that moment when I called it was

14:06

like the adoptions back on I can't do

14:08

it? Yes. Were you like sad or? Yeah.

14:10

Okay so a part of me was like

14:12

because you obviously told me was like

14:14

because you obviously told me that after

14:17

you said your mom wasn't in the

14:19

biocypers or something like that I'm thinking

14:21

about like damn it. All right fine

14:23

well we'll just you know I'll figure

14:25

this out I'll figure this. I want

14:27

to do adoption, it's back on, all

14:29

the reasons to say the same. Remember

14:31

you mentioned me? Well, our pros of cons

14:33

list that we made is still the same. Nothing's

14:35

changed. We haven't gotten a bigger house. My mom

14:38

hasn't gotten more money. So, so, so, so, so,

14:40

so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

14:42

so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

14:44

so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

14:46

so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

14:48

so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

14:50

so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

14:52

so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

14:54

so, so, so, so, so, so, so

14:56

I got partying was like accepting just

14:58

the chaos. All right, this is my

15:01

life. It's gonna be chaotic. Whatever

15:03

it's gonna be. But you know, to

15:05

say that I wasn't, you know, a

15:07

little devastated when you called and said

15:09

that would be a lie because I

15:11

was right. Let me talk about that. I

15:13

mean, we talked about that. I mean,

15:16

we have many times were in the

15:18

hospital even, look at each other, we

15:20

didn't have to say nothing. We just

15:22

knew, like, like, let's just run, let's

15:24

just run, had the perception that I

15:27

was just for this adoption 100% all

15:29

the time, you know, no, no negotiations,

15:31

whatever. And I get watching the clip,

15:34

but it's like, oh, you said, you know,

15:36

your decision. It's like, yeah, it was my

15:38

decision. But one thing you said, I love

15:40

so much was you said, you're just

15:42

lucky, I took your decision into consideration,

15:44

because I don't have to. And not

15:47

all girls do. And I was like,

15:49

boom. You know, that's the reality. Great

15:51

just said nice enough to do that. But I feel

15:53

like when I found out I pregnant, when I found

15:55

out that I was pregnant, I feel like I

15:57

automatically took you into consideration because I

16:00

because first while you were a good dude a supportive dude

16:02

were always there for me and I was like hey this

16:04

is 50% of his baby is it is mine like I

16:06

can't be the only one making all these decisions even

16:08

though I could have you could have that's what I

16:10

want everyone to understand though that you literally could have

16:12

yeah but you didn't no so I don't like that's

16:14

fair unless I mean if you were a loser and a shit and

16:17

just like left me I would have been doing I don't know how

16:19

I decided to do how I decided to do you know you know

16:21

you know you know you know you know you know you know you

16:23

know you know but But I think it was

16:25

like, just the wording was like, oh, it

16:27

was your decision, which took the way of

16:29

the fact that, you know, it wasn't your

16:31

decision. It was all mine and whatever. So

16:34

if you like, you know, listen, you can

16:36

go back and find multiple clips where we

16:38

made mistakes or said things that were, you know,

16:40

not the best or painted in a different

16:42

light. That's fine. We were on TV for

16:44

16 years. I guarantee you're going

16:46

to find something, multiple things that

16:48

just don't sit right with you. And

16:50

I also forget, do they forget like we

16:53

were literally growing up on television? Who doesn't

16:55

make mistakes in their young years? You know,

16:57

like I think honestly a lot of it,

16:59

the mistakes were like just from being

17:01

naive. Like, like, honestly, I think back about

17:03

a lot of the stuff that has to

17:05

do with the very first time that that

17:08

we got in trouble with Brannon Teresa

17:10

about posting the thing about Carly. The

17:12

very Instagram wasn't really a thing. So

17:14

like, I think Facebook fan pages are

17:16

more like popular or something back then.

17:18

But yeah, it was on that fan

17:20

page and I did it without even

17:22

thinking because all that stuff

17:24

happened, Dr. Drew magazine Life,

17:27

when it first happened. And I,

17:29

those are one, that's one example

17:31

where I feel young and naive and I

17:33

just, just being arrogant. And I

17:36

take full accountability for being arrogant

17:38

and just, just annoyed and feeling

17:40

inferior and just all those things.

17:42

And like that's, that's an honest

17:45

mistake. And I think. people forget

17:47

that we actually you know fix

17:49

that mistake quote unquote when we

17:51

went and had the conversation with

17:54

that and we talked about it all and we got

17:56

a lot of that number on further I would

17:58

ask for permission of what poach it I could

18:00

post. And they said we could post the

18:02

back of her head as long as you

18:04

can't see your face. Yes. And so that's

18:07

what we did. We never posted another

18:09

pick that was not approved by them.

18:11

And it was very rare that I

18:14

ever even after fact posted. Yeah. It

18:16

was like once every few visits I

18:18

would but it would always be the

18:21

back of her head where you can't

18:23

because I followed their boundary of

18:25

not showing her face and I

18:27

completely understood that. Right. And so

18:29

yeah, I feel like we came to a very

18:31

good understanding with that. Yeah,

18:34

and I think that's what also when they

18:36

mentioned to us about saying, we don't,

18:38

pretty much we don't want to be

18:40

on camera anymore and we were like,

18:42

that's fine. And the one, you know,

18:45

boundary that they said was, we don't

18:47

want to repeating our conversations verbatim. Yeah,

18:49

word for word for word. Sommerization was

18:51

fine. But don't repeat, at least say

18:54

word for work. We said, okay, okay,

18:56

fine. they never said stop talking about

18:58

Carly stop talking about the adoption now

19:00

stop all that stuff keep our names

19:02

out your mouth you know keep our

19:05

you know that never happened they literally

19:07

just said don't post our word for

19:09

work conversations or repeat the word

19:11

for conversations on camera right now and

19:14

so I feel like when people

19:16

talk about these boundaries that we've supposed

19:18

to be broken with them I have

19:20

a hard time figuring out where they are

19:22

because what I think is interesting too

19:24

is that you are literally telling

19:26

me what boundaries I was given as if

19:28

like it's almost like okay who makes

19:30

a boundary the person right and then

19:33

who delivers that boundary the person delivers

19:35

it to me not you so you're

19:37

telling me what the boundaries were that's

19:39

like you didn't see our private conversations

19:42

that we had right off camera not even

19:44

in public at all just me and you

19:46

and brain trees talking so yes and it's

19:48

always been private so that's why It's funny

19:50

because it's almost you know a good response

19:52

to people when they say like oh you've

19:55

broken boundaries like oh so when did bringing

19:57

the trees to tell you our boundaries? Thank you.

19:59

When did they... at least that information to

20:01

you because you're going off of

20:03

what you assume. Right, assumptions. And

20:05

that's dangerous. And that's kind of

20:07

why I feel like with this podcast

20:09

we can we can get into certain

20:11

stuff, we can we can you know

20:13

shine some more light, give some more

20:16

context because I do believe context is

20:18

super important. No, especially when

20:20

you're taking old clips that are

20:22

edited and down and putting them all

20:24

together to fit your narrative or

20:26

whatever whatever it is you're trying

20:28

to prove. from a private conversation

20:30

that I had with Brad and Teresa.

20:33

That we've never even shared. That we've

20:35

never shared. Yeah. So it's like, and

20:37

also about communication, like, you don't know

20:39

how often we texted on a daily

20:41

basis. You're assuming that we didn't talk

20:44

a lot or you're assuming that we messaged

20:46

every two months or you're assuming if

20:48

it was me, I would only message

20:50

maybe once, twice a year. Well, you

20:52

don't know the normalcy of our normalcy

20:54

of our communication. You don't know.

20:56

So how can you... So that's why I

20:58

think though too for me I think

21:00

it's like I don't have a

21:03

problem with addressing certain things but

21:05

when you address things and people

21:07

still don't understand or don't believe

21:09

you that's why I automatically I'm

21:11

like you know what fine I

21:14

said my truth that I'm not

21:16

going to keep going back and

21:18

addressing the same issue over and over

21:20

and over again and that's why I said

21:22

at the end of the day I sleep

21:25

great yeah because I know. So, like, I'm,

21:27

yeah. But, but I also think it's

21:29

like, like you said, to just get,

21:31

I'm gonna address it one time,

21:33

one last time, and that's it.

21:36

I think it's important. We can

21:38

do that. We're allowed to do that.

21:40

And I think it's, it's, it's, it's,

21:42

it gives clarification for people

21:44

who are making all these

21:47

assumptions. People on Tiktok,

21:49

making these assumptions is dangerous. Oh

21:51

God. Yeah. And it feeds people.

21:53

You're talking about it more than

21:55

I am. True. You're making multiple

21:57

videos talking about our situation. I'm

22:00

talking about Carly's story, but you don't

22:02

even know it. Well, I don't even

22:04

know it. Preaching against us doing it.

22:06

Right. So I think that people should

22:09

really kind of self-refuck a little bit.

22:11

You're telling us certain things and you're

22:13

making these videos with all these assumptions,

22:15

which none are verified. None are... I just think

22:18

it's crazy. I think the piggyback off that

22:20

too. I think one thing that I also

22:22

would like to say is, you know, it goes

22:24

back to people not knowing the full details

22:26

of the full details of our details of

22:28

our story, But even when Teresa said,

22:30

like, I'm not going to be responding to

22:32

your text for a while, we spoke to

22:35

adoptees and we got multiple adoptees

22:37

and multiple adoptees told us, keep

22:39

reaching out, send pictures, tag pictures

22:41

along with your messages so that way you

22:44

have receipts. You can show Carly when she's

22:46

over that you did not stop. And if

22:48

her parents decide to show these to her or

22:50

not, that's up to them. But at least you

22:52

can go and say, I didn't stop. I tried

22:55

to send updates, all of those things, all of

22:57

those things. as birth parents when stuff gets cut

22:59

off you don't know what to do. So I

23:01

figured speaking to adopt ease and other

23:03

birth parents would push me in the right

23:06

direction or what I should do. I also

23:08

feel like it's kind of like a lose-lose

23:10

like there's no winning because if we didn't

23:12

reach out people would say you're not reaching

23:15

because if we didn't reach out people would

23:17

say you're an if you're not reaching. There's

23:19

no winning for birth parents in

23:21

this situation. There's no winning for

23:23

birth parents in this situation. like

23:26

you said, every doctor we talked

23:28

to said, I would want to know

23:30

that you still tried. Yeah. Boom. Okay.

23:32

And I had some that said, I,

23:34

you know, I wish I would have

23:36

had, saw my, my birth parents trying

23:38

that hard. Right. And it's like, Oh,

23:41

damn. Yeah. So it's like, I mean,

23:43

and honestly, you know, you said in

23:45

a text message that you did,

23:47

that wasn't normal text messages. You

23:49

only started addressing Carly personally on

23:52

Teresa's phone. Well you may not

23:54

be responding to me that's fine

23:56

but I made a promise to

23:58

Carly to always reach give updates,

24:00

pictures, letters, whatever. So that's what I'm

24:02

doing. And like you said, you can

24:04

choose to not show her to her

24:07

at all, that's fine. And you can

24:09

choose also not to talk to me

24:11

at all, that's fine. But that's also

24:13

separate from my promise I made to

24:15

her and how I feel that she

24:17

should, you know, the information she should

24:20

know, whatever. And so I think people

24:22

see the screenshots of like, or the,

24:24

you know. Right, it looks crazy, I'm

24:26

sure, I'm sure, I get it. It

24:28

does. But they didn't understand the backstory.

24:31

And you don't understand the context. Right.

24:33

So it's like, yeah, if you think

24:35

two text messages a month is overboard

24:37

or too much or whatever, that's your

24:39

perception. That's valid. But like I said,

24:41

your perception is based off of your

24:44

perception. It's not based off of the

24:46

normalcy. No. And the, you know, track

24:48

record of communication that we've always had

24:50

with them. You don't know those specific

24:52

details. So you can't really tell me.

24:54

That's over doing it. That's over doing

24:57

it. How do you know? They tell

24:59

you that. That's what I'm saying. When

25:01

did Branger you tell you that, hey,

25:03

you know, we only text once every

25:05

five months, so twice a month is

25:07

too much. You know what I mean?

25:10

Like you're going off of these things

25:12

with, and honestly, I feel like, well,

25:14

people don't understand that that's dangerous. And

25:16

you're making these assumptions and having people

25:18

on that for a second. I'm only

25:21

here speaking my truth as a birth

25:23

parent, so that way if she does

25:25

come and look for information, there it

25:27

is. And she has a truth. But

25:29

she's not going to have the truth

25:31

on top of all these assumptions and

25:34

these speculations and none of the details,

25:36

none of the information, the correct information,

25:38

a lot of it's false. A lot

25:40

of it's wrong. So like the whole

25:42

thing about it being five years. There

25:44

has been the finalized paperwork. which for

25:47

our open adoption agreement which we have

25:49

which i don't know where where it's

25:51

at but people are confused saying that

25:53

the adoption was only for five years

25:55

and that mean you should be grateful

25:58

for anything about and beyond. Of course.

26:00

And that, and shout out to be

26:02

grateful. And that is my thing is

26:04

like, that is false. The paperwork that

26:06

you're getting the information off of was

26:08

from a not finalized form of our

26:11

adoption agreement when Dawn gave us that

26:13

at the table that rush. Yeah, and

26:15

that was from like way in the

26:17

beginning of our us making the adoption

26:19

plan. Yeah, so in the whole five

26:21

years thing was only about a picture

26:24

that I wanted on her birthday, specifically...

26:26

by yourself for the first five years

26:28

so that way which you never got

26:30

by the way well we got pictures

26:32

it just wasn't not like that though

26:34

not the way it was fine I

26:37

never argued about it whatever I never

26:39

complain because I was like listen I'm

26:41

still getting pictures I was happy about

26:43

it no but the information that they're

26:45

going off of that little clause in

26:48

that piece of paper that they're zooming

26:50

in from a TV show yeah is

26:52

not the finalized open adoption agreement yeah

26:54

it's in my email and it clearly

26:56

states visits up until 18. Once a

26:58

year. Once a year. Annual. A-N-N-U-A-L. Annual

27:01

visits. That is one visit per year

27:03

until she's 18. Right. All of our

27:05

signatures are on it. It's all in

27:07

black and white. It's all there. Yeah.

27:09

But God forbid, you keep going on

27:11

your little screenshot of a TV show

27:14

from 10 years ago and zooming in

27:16

the little claws on adoption paperwork that

27:18

wasn't the final form. Right. No, it

27:20

wasn't. So you're making these tectonics and

27:22

these damaging accusations and I think it's

27:25

off of false information. Well and it

27:27

comes back to people not fully being

27:29

educated about adoption and open adoption because

27:31

like we were told this whole time

27:33

and this whole journey when we were

27:35

making this decision for her was you

27:38

know if you ever change your mind

27:40

about openness or whatever during this we

27:42

can don't usually say we can pull

27:44

out the big eraser we can erase

27:46

it and we can make it to

27:48

however you feel and however you want

27:51

it. So yes, after she was born

27:53

and we held her and saw her...

27:55

Of course, we thought to ourselves, oh

27:57

hell no, this is going to be

27:59

really hard. I love her. I want

28:01

to see her. I don't want to

28:04

have any what-ifs. I want to know

28:06

what she's doing and what does she

28:08

look like and what is she into?

28:10

And so we told Don, no, no,

28:12

we want to switch it open. And

28:15

we did. Yeah. And you and you,

28:17

and you, and I honestly, I want

28:19

everyone to understand that that is okay.

28:21

Birth mothers are allowed to change their

28:23

mind. once that baby comes into the

28:25

world because everything before the whole nine

28:28

months of being pregnant is all speculation

28:30

wondering not knowing what it's going to

28:32

be like and what how you're going

28:34

to feel. Yeah. And so I think

28:36

people don't understand that during the whole

28:38

adoption process they always say well once

28:41

the baby's born things may be different

28:43

and they always before the whole nine

28:45

months of being pregnant is all speculation

28:47

wondering not knowing what it's going to

28:49

be like and what how you're going

28:51

to feel. Yeah. And so I think

28:54

people don't understand that during the whole

28:56

adoption process. They always say, well, once

28:58

the baby's born, things may be different.

29:00

And they always said you could change

29:02

your mind. And I believe that every

29:05

woman has a right to change her

29:07

mind, especially when it comes to being

29:09

a mother for the rest of your

29:11

life or not being a mother. That's

29:13

a huge lifelong altering decision. So I

29:15

think people don't understand that it's also

29:18

not legally binding. You think it's open

29:20

option agreements, legally binding? It is not.

29:22

Well, no. But I know like... In

29:24

some states, like California, right? You can

29:26

enforce it and stuff like that too.

29:28

But yeah, a lot of people, yeah,

29:31

they don't. But I think another misconception,

29:33

which I think is funny that I'm

29:35

seeing a lot lately, and I like

29:37

you mentioned it too. So like my

29:39

mom and I's relationship is in a

29:42

better spot now than it was a

29:44

year ago, and like I love my

29:46

mom. Don't give me wrong, I do

29:48

a lover to my mom. But I

29:50

see a lot of people saying April

29:52

was right, April and Butch were right,

29:55

see they never should have done the

29:57

adoption. And I'm like, do all you

29:59

guys forget what you watched? Do you

30:01

not recall all of the stuff that

30:03

was happening at this house? My mom...

30:05

was using, butch was using, we were

30:08

moving all the time, my house wasn't

30:10

flet-vested with fleas, remember a Johnny Lagos?

30:12

Like, oh my god! Like, horrible walk

30:14

in and they would jump all over

30:16

you immediately. My mom got arrested for

30:18

drunk driving, like all these things, and

30:21

I'm like, so you think that I

30:23

should have just like, yep, my mom

30:25

was right, I totally should have brought

30:27

a baby into that environment. Like, what?

30:29

I think it's interesting, something because people,

30:32

because people are looking at the situation.

30:34

16 years down the line right okay

30:36

so you're like oh watch this old

30:38

clip oh my god there right it's

30:40

a dude you guys first off you

30:42

didn't know the future and second off

30:45

right they were on crack okay they're

30:47

on crack and drunk and getting evicted

30:49

and getting going to jail are you

30:51

guys seriously gonna tell us oh you

30:53

should listen to your mom you shall

30:55

listen to butch in April right I'm

30:58

like thinking about that for a second

31:00

you're telling me I should have to

31:02

listen to butch in April 16 years

31:04

ago let that's Doo, doo, doo, doo,

31:06

doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. Like, it

31:08

is actually mindblowing. And it's like, I

31:11

get what people are saying, like, oh,

31:13

well, April was able to, you know,

31:15

fish out dawn or sense that adoption

31:17

was wrong. But I'm gonna let you

31:19

guys know, her intention was to have

31:22

what she... thought was hers and what

31:24

she thought was right yeah and what

31:26

she wanted to be a grandma wanted

31:28

you to be a mom it had

31:30

no her and your dad go yeah

31:32

they did not try telling her your

31:35

dad he was like I would live

31:37

in a car with my yeah it's

31:39

like yeah people are confused at oh

31:41

they try it's don't know their intention

31:43

behind Wanting us to keep Carly was

31:45

not based off of because they thought

31:48

you're going to be screwed by adoption

31:50

They could tell that adoption was a

31:52

scam or whatever the cases They did

31:54

it because of selfish reasonings and that's

31:56

the massive truth because one thing that

31:59

people also don't realize is the day

32:01

that we signed off our rights in

32:03

court They fought us in court. They

32:05

literally stood in the back of that

32:07

courtroom and screamed that they object and

32:09

they want custody of her. Yeah, they

32:12

wanted to fight for custody of her

32:14

and I remember the judge looking and

32:16

saying I see two young children standing

32:18

in front of me, knowing what they

32:20

want for their child. And he was

32:22

like, absolutely not, I deny it. I

32:25

remember they had to get the bailiff

32:27

and get escorted. Yeah, because your mom

32:29

was mad and my dad was mad

32:31

and all this other stuff. But, and

32:33

it's like, yeah, because they were on

32:35

crack, we're not gonna listen to, and

32:38

also you're fighting for custody and you're

32:40

getting evicted at the same time. My

32:42

mind. So, so. Know what it was

32:44

like in their house on the day

32:46

to day. No, they see these clips

32:49

and so if you see my mother

32:51

and your dad acting like that on

32:53

camera guys What did people think it

32:55

was like my all the time? Yeah,

32:57

you know in the fact you're saying

32:59

oh you should listen to April bought

33:02

her back to that house No, are

33:04

you serious? Like you said we can't

33:06

predict the future right of course? I

33:08

mean the thing people are saying oh

33:10

you should have captured or you should

33:12

have parents her because we're on the

33:15

TV show for 15 years and it

33:17

gave us all this financial freedom and

33:19

all these resources that we never want

33:21

to have all blah. I would say

33:23

if I could go back to that

33:26

six year old and be as wise

33:28

and know all the information that I

33:30

know now I might have made a

33:32

different decision but unfortunately nobody can do

33:34

that like you own a crystal ball

33:36

you can't go back in time so

33:39

but for people to be like April

33:41

which we're like I I'm like my

33:43

mind when I see that comment and

33:45

all likes I'm like I'm like I'm

33:47

like Are you guys for real dude?

33:49

You want us as 16 year olds

33:52

to listen to crack heads? Hell no.

33:54

That's insane, bro. Yeah, I just think

33:56

it's interesting that we are even having

33:58

to really go down this rabbit hole.

34:00

But I think it's justified because, like

34:02

I said, real people have real, you

34:05

know, consequences and things happened. when you

34:07

go on these videos and you make

34:09

all these damaging speculations and accusations and

34:11

you're fueling a fire that shouldn't even

34:13

really be brewing, right? Even fun, you

34:16

know, is when you see people making

34:18

these videos and they're spewing just misinformation

34:20

and you reach out to those people

34:22

and you're like, hey, listen, you can...

34:24

not like me but you know you're

34:26

spilling a lot of mistruth and I

34:29

would like to inform you and then

34:31

they block you but then continue making

34:33

videos about you so you don't want

34:35

the truth no it's isn't that weird

34:37

so I'm reaching out to you personally

34:39

not to I have no you can

34:42

still not like me I'm not even

34:44

trying to change your opinion what I'm

34:46

trying to do is give you the

34:48

accurate data fact so that way in

34:50

the fact so that way when you

34:52

do make these videos you're not spewing

34:55

damaging accusations. In speculations you actually have

34:57

all the data. Do you want the

34:59

data to make better informed videos? And

35:01

you go, no. I still think certain

35:03

things I wouldn't do if I were

35:06

you blah blah blah I understand on

35:08

a deeper level. You don't want you

35:10

don't want the data. You don't want

35:12

the truth. That's funny. You don't want

35:14

the facts. And there's other creators who

35:16

you reach out to them and they're

35:19

like other creators who you reach out

35:21

to them and they like oh yeah

35:23

and they're like oh yeah and then

35:25

we'll talk and they're like oh yeah

35:27

and then we'll talk and even like

35:29

why I wouldn't. I can't control. people's

35:32

opinions and what they do and what

35:34

videos they make, but I definitely think

35:36

if you're going to make the videos

35:38

hate on me, I want you to

35:40

have all the accurate data. To do

35:43

so. So that way if you're going

35:45

to hate on me, at least you're

35:47

spitting fast. Yeah, and not misinformation because

35:49

it's damaging. We know how bad misinformation

35:51

can harm stuff, so I just feel

35:53

like I think people should check their

35:56

hypocrisy when it comes to making continuous

35:58

videos with speculations. Like that they word.

36:00

What? Yeah, and not misinformation, because it's

36:02

damaging. We know how bad misinformation can

36:04

harm stuff. So, yeah. I just feel

36:06

like, I think people should check their

36:09

hypocrisy when it comes to making continuous

36:11

videos with speculations. I like that big

36:13

word. Hypocracy. Oh, hypocrisy? That's a big

36:15

word. You would have literally asked serious

36:17

about it for you. Oh, for sure.

36:19

Hypocracy. H-I-P. Hold on. H-I-P. H-I-P. You're

36:22

already. H-I-H-I-Pocracy. H-I-I-I-I-P without the E. H-Y?

36:24

Yeah. H-Y-P-R-S. I-R-S. See why

36:26

I don't know. Yeah, anyway, so yeah

36:28

the videos people are making it's a

36:31

critical to preach about privacy and that

36:33

oh You're breaking boundaries because you keep

36:35

talking about that situation keep talking about

36:37

it publicly But you're literally making ten

36:40

times where videos that I've ever made

36:42

you're turning by my life all the

36:44

time public. That's a very critical and

36:46

I think you should do some introspection

36:48

on that Right right totally agree anything

36:51

else. I mean honey. We have a

36:53

whole Show that you didn't talk I

36:55

know but I was trying to think

36:57

like hey, okay our whole goal of

37:00

the episode was to just kind of

37:02

like go through what we're seeing right

37:04

now Which is a lot of turmoil

37:06

people are very and I also feel

37:09

like these creators once once the algorithm

37:11

Kind of feeds that thing now they

37:13

found their niche, right? Ooh All the

37:15

other videos have 1,200 likes, 100 views.

37:18

But this one video they made on

37:20

their opinion about our adoption story got

37:22

24,000 views. So now what do they

37:24

do? I hit the golden ticket. This

37:26

is my- So we must have their

37:29

views. Yeah, they're like, oh my god,

37:31

this is it. So if I keep

37:33

talking about the subjects, I'll keep gaining

37:35

all the stuff. So it's like, they

37:38

found their little niche. Oh gosh, yes.

37:40

Because then their video talking about us

37:42

thinking about us has like, like, like,

37:44

got hundreds of thousands of thousands of

37:47

thousands of thousands of thousands of thousands

37:49

of years. latching on to it and

37:51

running. Okay, so I asked our followers

37:53

on the Kate and Thai break it

37:56

down Instagram page. And I was like,

37:58

drop me some of your anonymous, like

38:00

juicy secrets. I will keep it anonymous.

38:02

And so I thought this was funny.

38:05

Oh no. Just to like bring it

38:07

up to you and we could talk

38:09

about it. What? Everybody on the page?

38:11

No, no, no. Actually, let's just go

38:13

from the bottom up. Okay. So I

38:16

got one which is from a fan

38:18

of ours anonymous, secret, yeah, secret. And

38:20

it said I slept with my younger

38:22

brother's best friend and it was fire.

38:25

I slept with my younger brother's best

38:27

friend and it was fire. I have

38:29

so many questions. What are the ages?

38:31

How far apart are they? Are you

38:34

literally like adults? Yeah, I would hope

38:36

so. Are you in right? I don't

38:38

know. I mean, so if somebody were

38:40

to... Like one of your friends sleep

38:43

with your sister. How would you feel

38:45

like that? I would I would want

38:47

to know you wouldn't I want to

38:49

know I don't want to know I

38:52

mean sure like your best friend my

38:54

best friend hey man listen keep it

38:56

to yourself home I don't want to

38:58

know about you. Hell no. Then what

39:00

happens if they ended up like well

39:03

being together yeah well then we have

39:05

to have a conversation but if you're

39:07

just boy and boy in a once

39:09

in a while whatever I don't even

39:12

know about that shit but that shit

39:14

but I mean but I mean You

39:16

know what I'm saying? Like, hey, whatever.

39:18

I mean, but yeah, I mean, what

39:21

the hell. Yeah, so I was like,

39:23

I just let out, you know, I'm

39:25

not really sure what I would do

39:27

in that situation. Like, what if, so

39:30

if somebody was sleeping with my sister

39:32

and it was my best friend. Say,

39:34

I don't know, what if he was

39:36

like a really good dude and really

39:39

loved my sister? I mean, eventually I

39:41

guess I'd probably get over it, like

39:43

if they ended up being together and

39:45

stuff like, like, like, like, like, like,

39:47

like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

39:50

like, like, You know what I mean?

39:52

Like, ew, you still have my... You're

39:54

nasty! I feel like my best friend

39:56

Sam slept with my sister back of

39:59

the day or something. When they entered

40:01

it together. I feel like, ew. That's

40:03

disgusting. I don't know. I don't want

40:05

to know about that shit. Now if

40:08

you want to date, we obviously have

40:10

to have a conversation because guys were

40:12

going to be at Thanksgiving. Yeah, you

40:14

would have to. So we got to

40:17

talk. Yeah, you have to at that

40:19

point. Hey, you're just hooking up. Mm-mm.

40:21

Hell no. Okay, so this one. I

40:23

was like, Ty, we'll get a kick

40:26

out of this, so I know you

40:28

have a lot to say. I masturbate.

40:30

while my husband's sleeping. Oh, whoa, what

40:32

the push- Yes, she masquerade while her

40:34

husband is sleeping next to her. Why?

40:37

My question is, is like, is he

40:39

not saying- What's going on? That's what

40:41

I'm saying. Listen, so what would your

40:43

reaction be? You can't give me any

40:46

of this, I need more information, I

40:48

need more details, because I, like, like,

40:50

dude. What the fuck? What would your

40:52

reaction be if you literally woke up

40:55

in the middle of the night to

40:57

be masturbating next to you? I would

40:59

be like, yo, I'm right here. You

41:01

got problems? Is my not... What's wrong

41:04

with me? That's what I'm thinking. Yeah,

41:06

I mean, what's wrong with me? Yes,

41:08

I think, what's wrong with me? Yes,

41:10

I think, what's wrong with me? Yeah,

41:12

I think, what's wrong with me? You

41:15

better vocalize. Or just have a conversation

41:17

about what, like, like, like, like, like,

41:19

like, like, like, You know what I

41:21

mean? Because that's crazy. I couldn't imagine,

41:24

like, waking up. Bro. And you're, like,

41:26

bro, jerking your chicken next to me.

41:28

I would, I would be mortified. Would

41:30

you be pissed? Yes. Yeah, because I

41:33

feel like, and I don't know if

41:35

that, is that mean, I don't know

41:37

what that means, the fact that I'd

41:39

be pissed, but I think it'd be

41:42

more or less like, what's wrong with

41:44

you and what's wrong with us, what's

41:46

going on? Right? You're not speaking. Yeah,

41:48

you're just masturbating while I'm sleep. Yo,

41:51

don't do it. Yo, we're in the

41:53

same bed. What's you? Why? What's going

41:55

on? They're really masturbating while sleeping next

41:57

to one another. I would be pissed.

42:00

Yeah, I don't know what that means about

42:02

me. I don't know about me body piss.

42:04

I think the anger would be hurt Yeah, yeah,

42:06

because you're like or and it would

42:08

be like am I not doing enough for you?

42:10

Am I not good at it? Am I not you

42:13

know, and I do obviously you ain't

42:15

doing something right? If she's been just

42:17

laying right next to you? Is there

42:20

best something I could do differently? That

42:22

is so wackity dackity. Like there needs

42:24

to be a conversation had Okay, well I

42:26

also feel like though when people say oh, how do you make

42:28

it last so long? How are you so happy? And it is

42:31

sex people don't they don't put that I'm not saying all that

42:33

It's very high. Well, I was going to say it's

42:35

successful thinking back that though is like But you have

42:37

to have conversations about sex. I mean, how am I going to

42:39

know what you like? Don't tell me right vice versa right right

42:41

right? But I think when people ask oh, what is it?

42:43

It's like communication. It's like communication.

42:45

It's like communication. It's like communication which

42:47

involves like communication which involves which

42:49

involves which involves Talking about sex,

42:52

communicating about what you like, what you

42:54

don't like. Yeah. And vice versa. So

42:56

like when I say communicate, and then

42:58

I say sex and honesty, loyalty, like

43:00

those are all things that are like,

43:02

that's what makes things last. And also

43:04

be honest, you have to be honest.

43:06

I am not protecting your feelings, and

43:08

I don't want you protecting my feelings

43:10

vice versa. In a respectful way. Well,

43:13

I'm not gonna start. Stupid bitch?

43:15

I'm not going to be like,

43:17

right? You know, you're not going

43:19

to respect that about her. But

43:21

like, I'm not, but when I tell

43:23

you things, I'm not thinking about, oh

43:26

my God, I don't want to hurt

43:28

her things. I have to be honest.

43:30

Who you want to portray about

43:32

how you're really feeling? Yeah. And

43:35

so, and if my honesty creates

43:37

a response in you where

43:39

I have to apologize for, that's

43:41

a little different. Be honest and

43:44

say you're not doing something. I'll be

43:46

honest with you. I'll be honest with you

43:48

if I don't know what guy this girl's

43:50

married to ever But there are so many

43:52

books out there and I highly suggest reading

43:55

them all because or just like flip a few

43:57

on the bed for him to read what

43:59

bed or books Yeah, give them some books.

44:01

Yeah, I mean, that's what I'm saying though,

44:03

but I also feel like... Dudes, read

44:05

the books, bro, read all the

44:07

books, read, talk, communicate with your

44:10

partner or whatever. I mean, literally,

44:12

I had to, Kate didn't even know

44:14

all the parts of her lady parts.

44:16

I had to explain all the books.

44:18

Yeah, I don't know what that is.

44:20

I'm like, that's a majora, minor. You're

44:22

like, you're like, what? So it's like,

44:25

yeah, get educated, bro, like, damn.

44:27

That's what I mean. There needs to

44:29

be a conversation at. Wow. Wow. I

44:31

guess my thing is, how do people

44:33

not conversate about it? Like, how do

44:35

you not have conversations about it? You

44:38

just lay there, pretend your whole life

44:40

that this is great? Why would you

44:42

do that to yourself? And then there is

44:44

one where I'm like, hmm, this is

44:47

a sticky situation. I'm not sure who

44:49

my baby daddy is to my second

44:51

child. my husband's or a friend of

44:53

mine so like does this husband think

44:55

that this baby is his no old this

44:57

baby and she is saying that she doesn't

45:00

know if it's the husband or her friend

45:02

or her friends well I think it's how you

45:04

find out I know right get a DNA test

45:06

well and you think about yeah because you

45:08

think the friend knows and you know you

45:10

don't I mean don't involve the husband if

45:12

you don't have to I guess at this

45:15

point because I'm not sure when this happened

45:17

if you don't Broke, I don't, you

45:19

know what I'm saying? Well, right,

45:21

but my thing is, is like,

45:23

so you have this baby, whatever,

45:25

you don't know if it's your

45:28

husband or your friends, but if

45:30

your husband is just going along

45:32

and thinking this is his baby

45:35

and then finds out he's not,

45:37

yeah, that's very, like, you might

45:39

just get the hurt over with

45:41

now. Because to prolong it? You and the friend?

45:43

Do a deed? Me to do a thing together.

45:45

I say, listen, I gotta make sure. And then you,

45:48

then that result will open up other bridges. Or it

45:50

might close it off and like, cool, we don't have

45:52

to do nothing. Right. We gotta worry about nothing because

45:54

it's actually my husband's. And then we just gotta, yeah.

45:56

Yeah, but then God, could you imagine going to

45:58

sleep a night holding that secret? Oh,

46:00

what secret? That like, I cheated on my husband and

46:02

my friend. I know what it's doing, then holding a

46:05

baby saying, this ain't your baby, your baby. Oh, I

46:07

know, but both of them are bad. Both of them

46:09

are bad. I think I'd pick the other one, like, where,

46:11

I mean, you know, and people, man, you know, stock

46:13

me. Yeah, that's, you know? People, man. Yeah, that's,

46:16

you know? That's, you know, like, people, like, like,

46:18

people, like, people, like, people, like, like, like, people,

46:20

like, people, like, like, like, like, people, like, like,

46:22

like, people, like, like, people, like, like, like,

46:24

like, like, like, like, like, people, like, like, like,

46:26

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

46:28

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like Because

46:30

that's something you're really good at. Like you

46:32

say what you don't like, I say what I

46:35

like, what don't like, and that's it. And

46:37

you take, you know what I mean? Like, I, guys,

46:39

just read books. There's so many books out

46:41

there. Just read the books and you'll, you,

46:43

like I said, just like, have a

46:45

conversation about sex. You know, it's not, and

46:47

it shouldn't be uncomfortable to have conversations

46:50

with your partner about sex. It is

46:52

that. In my opinion. Right. Right. Right.

46:54

Right. Right. Right. Right. uncomfortable

46:56

to have these conversations. And obviously

46:59

it's necessary because if you're not

47:01

being pleasured the way that you

47:03

deserve to be. Yeah, it's a huge

47:06

problem. Like for instance pain, you're going

47:08

to lay there and just be in

47:10

pain? Right. Like that's horrible. And honestly,

47:12

if a guy really loves a woman or

47:14

whatever, he's not going to want her to

47:16

be in pain. No. And so what I'm

47:18

saying is that like, like, for instance

47:20

for us, like that's important. You

47:22

need to explain, hey, that. It's

47:25

not okay, that sucks. And like,

47:27

that, but, because we don't know,

47:29

right? I don't know what you like,

47:31

what you don't, you know what I'm

47:33

saying? Yeah, and vice versa. Talk.

47:35

Mm-hmm. Like I can't imagine, like

47:38

I said, I can't imagine

47:40

just laying there just

47:42

pretending your whole lot. That's,

47:44

that's, dude, that's, that's, dude,

47:46

that is crazy. But. Or maybe

47:49

invite him, why is she? Why is she asking

47:51

the joiners in? I don't know. I don't know.

47:53

I don't know. I would be like freaking out.

47:55

How can you think? I think that's more disturbing

47:57

than the baby daddy friend thing. You know, I

47:59

know. Damn! Yeah. Because here's my thing, one thing

48:01

I also want to, when you're raising kids

48:03

too, if you're, I don't know if it's

48:05

people have kids, but when you're raising kids,

48:07

if you're also raising kids to show this

48:10

is what love looks like. Yeah. Like, this

48:12

is what, so being affectionate, being honest, communicating.

48:14

Like, I think that's super important, like, when

48:16

me and you hug or kiss, our kids

48:18

go crazy. Yeah, they always want to be

48:20

a part of it. They're like, like, like,

48:22

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

48:24

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

48:26

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

48:28

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

48:31

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

48:33

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

48:35

like, like, like, like And they run like

48:37

so it's like they want to join I

48:39

think it's important for kids to like see

48:41

It's so important. That's so important. That's what

48:43

it's like because then as your kids get

48:45

older They'll realize like oh my daddy never

48:47

did that to my mom or my mom

48:49

never did that to my dad or they

48:51

were very affectionate and kissed in front of

48:54

us And I think that's important for kids

48:56

to see yeah, but I was gonna say

48:58

some people like PDAa No, whatever I packed

49:00

my husband in front of my kids and

49:02

hug my kids yeah Remember that one time

49:04

when Noah had the little friend over? Yes.

49:06

I was gonna say her name, but uh,

49:08

me and you, we like kissed or whatever

49:10

and she was like, eww, that's gross. And

49:12

it was like, they just love each other.

49:15

Yeah, they just love each other. God. I

49:17

know, like us, she knows, we just have

49:19

each other. Yeah. Because she knows, she sees

49:21

it and the other, the other friend probably.

49:23

doesn't see it. Right. So she was like,

49:25

eww, what are you doing? Right. I don't

49:27

know. So you got very G-grade. It's not

49:29

like a show of my tongue on the

49:31

throat or left. Yeah. Love me. In front

49:33

of my children. Like no. You and G-rated.

49:35

It's like a peck. You're still rated. It's

49:38

like a peck. You're still showing your kids.

49:40

Like, you're still showing your kids. I like

49:42

that. Then I get in the loopholes and

49:44

I want to know all of me. Yeah,

49:46

I wouldn't know all the details. Yeah, I

49:48

was like, oh my god, like, what? Yeah,

49:50

I thought that one was crazy and I

49:52

told your niece about it beforehand. I was

49:54

like, this is what I'm gonna show your

49:56

uncle today when we record. And she was

49:58

like, oh my God, she's like, I probably

50:01

was like, what about me? That's what I'm

50:03

saying. I guess it's one of those things

50:05

that where you take it personal, right? How

50:07

do you not get personal? You know what

50:09

I'm saying? Of course you would take it.

50:11

Because then you're like, dude, I'm literally laying

50:13

right here, bro. Like, I guess we never

50:15

have to worry about that. Thank God. High

50:17

five, we wouldn't have been in that work.

50:19

Hey. But we had to communicate. Yeah. But

50:22

we had to communicate. Yeah. Because everyone has

50:24

different preferences and what they don't like and,

50:26

you know. Some people are just in crazy

50:28

and shit. Right, and some people aren't. Some

50:30

people aren't. Some aren't. Tie me up, I'm

50:32

not into that. Right. Kick me, yeah. You

50:34

know, it's like, dude, I, you know, choke

50:36

me. It's like, I want to breathe, though.

50:38

So, I, some people are just vanilla. Yeah.

50:40

So, what do you consider vanilla, though? I

50:42

don't mean what he's sort of vanilla anymore.

50:45

Vanilla? Uh, uh, uh-huh, like, I think, I

50:47

think, just like, just like, like, just like,

50:49

like, like, like, like, like, like, just like,

50:51

like, like, like, like, like, just like, like,

50:53

like, like, like, like, just like, like, like,

50:55

like, like, like, like, like, just like, like,

50:57

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

50:59

like, like, like, like, like, like, like normal

51:01

sex. Like no no BDSN, taking the whips

51:03

out, we ain't strailing each other. Yeah and

51:06

I'm fine with that. I give you vanilla

51:08

sex all the time. Because honestly, like dude.

51:10

If that's what it's considered vanilla. Then give

51:12

me the... I don't know what it is

51:14

but I don't want to be in pain.

51:16

No. So that's where it comes in pain.

51:18

So people like... People have different preferences. But

51:20

how did that happen to you? Now I'm

51:22

curious about your past. I'm like, wait, why

51:24

do you want to be strapped to a

51:26

board like the hog? Right. And whipped and

51:29

cut and shit. And it turns you on.

51:31

Yeah, now I have so many questions about

51:33

your past and your child's on that. What

51:35

the fuck is happening? Oh my God, I'm

51:37

dead. But honestly, I do think it's one

51:39

of the most important things. And I think

51:41

it's something that no one should settle, no

51:43

one should settle, settle, settle, settle, settle, settle,

51:45

like, like, you know that. Like your sexual

51:47

compatibility should be exactly how it should be.

51:50

You shouldn't settle, they shouldn't settle, like... And

51:52

then you think too about halaise, so religion

51:54

stuff is so anti-no sex before marriage, don't

51:56

live with people before you're married, stuff like

51:58

that. But then imagine if you guys get

52:00

married, you're like, oh my God, I love

52:02

this guy, he's the best thing ever, and

52:04

then you guys, the marriage that night, and

52:06

you're like, like, this sucks, sucks. Then what?

52:08

Now what? I'm married. You're right, and I'm

52:10

stuffed with this dick forever? Then what do

52:13

you do? And you and I have watched

52:15

a few weird shows. Remember even like, uh...

52:17

The one where they got married, the first

52:19

kiss was at the ultimate dude. And they

52:21

were like highly religious and it was the

52:23

most awkward, they didn't even know how to

52:25

freaking kids. I guess, I guess. So imagine

52:27

them having sex. So imagine them having sex

52:29

sex. Okay, I know, but I guess a

52:31

part of it, I guess a part of

52:34

it, I could see, like a part of

52:36

it, I could see, like a part of

52:38

it, like, like, like, like, like, like. It

52:40

could be a beautiful, growing experience to grow

52:42

with it together, right? But y'all, I ain't

52:44

marrying nobody. If I don't know, they can

52:46

lay it down. I'm not doing it. I'm

52:48

not doing it. I'm not doing it. We

52:50

have to know. We have to know. You

52:52

have to know. Because that's what I mean.

52:54

Could you manage to get in it? And

52:57

it's his weebies like this thing? Yeah, every

52:59

size deck all the way. I know but

53:01

like honestly as but see like girls have

53:03

to communicate that for a second but honestly

53:05

yeah because when we talk about you even

53:07

I mean I was gonna say you said

53:09

you take some off you would shrink it

53:11

yeah because that's also goes to pain right

53:13

yeah and how I know a woman like

53:15

their cervix being a slam okay no but

53:18

like honestly but see like girls have to

53:20

communicate that to us guys because you know

53:22

we grow up a mother mother mother fuck

53:24

her mother Somebody that should but I don't

53:26

know it goes to compatibility. You have to

53:28

communicate. Yeah, you do you if you never

53:30

were told me you hurt me then that

53:32

would I never would have Clocked that you

53:34

know, I never would even thought to be

53:36

careful in what I tell you all the

53:38

time when you have like you see certain

53:41

women commonly. Oh no I love it. It's

53:43

fucking amazing and I'm like you're a fucking

53:45

liar you are a liar because if you

53:47

love that shit something is wrong with you

53:49

you're a liar. You're a liar lies lies.

53:51

Because it ain't not ruin the mood quicker

53:53

than that. No, then you hit me. You

53:55

hit me and it's jammed in the cervix.

53:57

I'm like, oh my god, dude. Hurts. Unless

53:59

there's no different part that's in the BDSM

54:02

and they like the pain. That's what I'm

54:04

saying. No, that's what I mean. It's a

54:06

communicate though. Maybe they like, like I said,

54:08

oh, getting strapped to a book. No, thank

54:10

you. I'm not trying to have a contraction.

54:12

Thank you. Yeah, because remember there, we read

54:14

that one, uh, Miros, it could change something

54:16

physical. They had to answer it. And you're

54:18

like, I would just take an edge off.

54:20

And I'm like, well, that's not what I

54:22

was expecting. That brings up the the point

54:25

of like you have to, like, like, like,

54:27

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, That

54:29

little, that lady needs to fucking communicate. They

54:31

definitely need to have a conversation. Even if

54:33

you have to get a therapist involved to

54:35

help you if you're not sure how to

54:37

say what your needs are or whatever. Yeah,

54:39

true, yeah, right. Getting the therapy of sexual

54:41

therapists and stuff like that too. And you

54:43

know what, her and her husband should go

54:46

on one of those like the sex retreat.

54:48

Cancer, where it's not like all about, yeah,

54:50

it's not all about having sex, but it's

54:52

about learning, about learning, about learning, learning, about

54:54

learning, about learning, about learning, about learning, about

54:56

learning, about learning, about, about, about, about, about,

54:58

about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about,

55:00

about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about,

55:02

about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about,

55:04

about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about,

55:06

about, about, about, about, about, about, about Yeah.

55:09

Well, at least you don't ever have to,

55:11

you don't ever have to worry about me.

55:13

Master your next you life sleeps. Thank God.

55:15

Because I'm like, yo, my whole life would

55:17

be in shambles. I wouldn't know what the

55:19

month's going on. Who am I? Who are

55:21

you? What am I? What is this? Crisis.

55:23

What is we doing here? Like, what the

55:25

book? So yeah. So now that we're, you

55:27

know, off the topic of masturbation. I'm like,

55:30

no bro, we just, I don't know, you

55:32

didn't know. I was like, like, the first

55:34

episode I said, it's like ADHD on crack.

55:36

But again, so we do have some, after

55:38

this week's episode, we have some really fun

55:40

and good interesting conversations with people coming up.

55:42

Also, don't forget to like and subscribe and

55:44

subscribe and subscribe. Tik, all with the same

55:46

username. Kate and Ty break it down, you

55:48

can catch us on Spotify, Apple podcasts, anywhere

55:50

that you listen to podcast, you can find

55:53

it. And just huge thanks for the support,

55:55

and we look forward. talking to

55:57

you guys next week.

55:59

Yeah, you guys are

56:01

great. Thank you. to

56:05

you guys next

56:07

week. Yeah, you

56:10

guys are great.

56:12

Thank you. and

56:14

thrills are free

56:17

with heart pumping

56:19

hits like the

56:21

Walking Dead and

56:24

Pulp Fiction. Direct

56:26

the Mundo! Be

56:28

with a free

56:31

Pluto TV.

56:33

Pay now, Pay

56:36

Never.