0:00

Welcome to Checking In with Michelle Williams,

0:02

a production of iHeartRadio and The Black

0:04

Effect. Hey,

0:18

y'all, I think this conversation

0:20

with Pastor mic Todd is going

0:23

to be transformative for

0:26

those that will listen with an open mind and

0:28

an open heart. That

0:30

you will listen with an

0:32

open mind and an open

0:34

heart. And if you're able to get

0:36

to the end of my

0:38

conversation, I'm gonna

0:41

surprise him too. But I'm going to

0:43

surprise you, and I want

0:45

you to listen to the end of the conversation

0:47

for some specific instructions

0:50

that I am going to give. Pastor

0:53

mic Todd is a number one New York Times

0:55

bestselling author, pastor

0:57

of Transformation Church in Tulsa, oakal

0:59

lie A Homer, a phenomenal

1:02

musician and producer,

1:06

and it's good to hear

1:08

him picking up music again.

1:11

And we'll talk about that. We'll talk about how

1:13

sometimes, you know, do you feel like you

1:15

have to lay something down for a season

1:19

because of something else that you're maybe

1:21

called to do a purpose to do. So you gotta

1:23

lay one thing down, do

1:25

your assignment, and then come back up and

1:28

pick up the other thing that you're also

1:30

gifted at too. So I'm excited

1:32

to hear his take on all of

1:35

that. And so y'all stay locked in. Pastor

1:37

Mike Todd is in the building, y'all

1:43

listen. I am very excited

1:45

to have on checking in

1:48

Pastor Mike Todd.

1:51

Now, if you read the book, he

1:54

tells you his whole government name.

1:56

Okay, on like the first page of

1:59

Damage but Not Destroyed, y'all.

2:01

I'm so excited because Damage but Not Destroyed

2:04

is available now

2:07

today. T U h d A y

2:09

okay. So I'm gonna make him blush a little

2:12

bit. But all I'm gonna do is speak

2:14

facts.

2:15

Oh no, okay.

2:16

He is the number one New York Times bestselling

2:19

author. All right, two

2:21

million now, two

2:23

million copies sold

2:26

of his first book, Relationship

2:28

Goals.

2:29

That's crazy, right, I'm

2:31

so excited.

2:32

How do you feel.

2:33

About that number one? I'm

2:36

talking to Michelle Willions.

2:39

It's good to be on the New York Times bestseller list.

2:41

I thought I was gonna make it. I didn't make it. I want I could

2:43

have been number twenty nine on the best but you number

2:46

one.

2:46

But this is better than the New York's Time bestseller

2:48

list. Because I'm on a podcast with Michelle

2:50

Williams. Do you know how much of an intricate

2:53

part you were of my upbringing?

2:55

Okay, save my name and save my name. I

2:58

just needed you to know.

3:00

That's one of the chapters of the book.

3:02

Okay, keep going, Okay, we don't give

3:04

it away yet, don't give it away yet. We talked about that in

3:06

a minute. But I am so

3:08

excited to be here with you. I feel like you're my

3:10

sister. We got to meet for just a little

3:13

moment in Atlanta, and it was like, where

3:15

have you been all my life? And it's

3:17

just really one of those cool, cool moments

3:20

to connect with people who actually care

3:23

about doing the inner work as well

3:25

as all the things that are happening in public.

3:27

So yeah, I wrote a book about

3:29

relationship goes about me and

3:31

my wife, who I've been dating since

3:34

I was fourteen years old. Is when I met her, and

3:37

literally all the ups and downs, trials,

3:39

tribulations, crazy moments and

3:42

our story of redemption and just some

3:44

things that people could be helped

3:46

in relationship because people kind

3:48

of fail at that a lot in this day and age.

3:51

And I put it out in the middle

3:53

of a pandemic. I'd never written a book before

3:56

I barely passed math, math,

3:58

and English high school. So it

4:01

was like, I mean, let me just share

4:03

something that I think is valuable, and I

4:05

mean it went crazy and people bought

4:08

it all over the world. And to think that's

4:10

the first time I've heard the two million number. That's

4:12

ridiculous. Like the fact that that

4:14

book has gone on. I just pray that it's

4:16

a blessing to people for a long long time.

4:18

And help people win. In Mayorage dating

4:20

and checks that's it.

4:23

And he smiled really big too

4:26

when he got to say that because he got somebody, he gets

4:28

to go home to.

4:30

His wife, Glory to the living

4:32

God.

4:33

Listen, listen, listen, Lord,

4:36

help me too. Oh don't and

4:38

I have. It wasn't

4:40

nothing. It wasn't y'all listening. It wasn't

4:42

none of your business. But yes, okay.

4:45

Another

4:47

fact is.

4:49

That you are the lead pastor

4:51

of Transformation Church in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

4:53

I am, okay, I am, and

4:56

I love it.

4:56

And there's so many ways I can

4:58

go relationship, go the faith

5:01

testimony of how you guys acquired

5:03

the building and just your whole journey. It

5:05

would take hours to talk about

5:07

it. But I also want to tell people.

5:09

Y'all, he is a phenomenal musician, producer.

5:13

I say, a.

5:14

Musician, Michelle, you're doing too

5:16

much, too much. I know we're here to.

5:18

Talk about damage but not destroyed, from

5:20

trauma to triumph. I get it, and we're

5:22

gonna get there. But y'all,

5:25

he's more than pastoring.

5:29

Is that's

5:32

the thing.

5:32

And we'll talk about a choice

5:35

that you might have had to make. Okay, let's

5:37

just let's do that.

5:38

The choice just going. Let's go and do it.

5:40

The choice that you possibly had to make

5:42

to lay down music to go into

5:45

ministry. Now, music

5:47

can be ministry, but I'm just saying in the form

5:49

of ministry that you now you had to lay down

5:51

the desire to be the artist and producer

5:54

musician.

5:55

So part of part of my journey is

5:57

I tell people all the time, you are not what you do

6:00

only and a lot of people

6:02

so many times they wrap their entire identity

6:04

off of whatever became successful. And

6:08

one of the things that I a six

6:11

minutes in, oh, I thought

6:13

we was I thought we came to do it

6:15

like I thought this was that podcast, so

6:17

we could go all the way in.

6:19

Okay.

6:19

So, and so the truth of the matter

6:22

is a lot of people, whatever successful,

6:24

they think that's where they should rest

6:26

all of their identity and purpose.

6:29

But the one thing I learned very early on is

6:31

that God never gives people just one

6:33

seed. He gives so many seeds

6:36

on the inside. It depends on what you water.

6:38

And on the inside of me, there were so many

6:41

seeds music and speaking

6:43

and creative and all these things, and I decided

6:45

that at a young age, I was going to water all

6:48

of them. And so when the fruits started coming

6:50

from all of them, I had to make a decision

6:52

to begin to ask God what was

6:55

my assignment, not my opportunity. And

6:57

a lot of people right now are

6:59

caught because they have so

7:01

many opportunities and they don't

7:03

know what an assignment is. And that's

7:06

where I'm here to really tell this generation that

7:08

you only can get an assignment from God.

7:10

But if you good, you can have tons of opportunities.

7:13

And so my my journey

7:16

took me to a place where the greatest

7:18

thing that I do is never what can I

7:20

do?

7:20

It's what does God want me to do?

7:22

And that's where I think a lot of people

7:24

are off right now. Somebody could offer me a lot

7:26

of money to do something I'm good at but I knew it

7:28

wouldn't be my assignment, and so that thing

7:31

wouldn't be blessed for me. And so I just

7:33

know that for me, that's what

7:35

happened. In the music and ministry.

7:37

I would have been successful as a music producer. I

7:39

probably would have produced your third album. I

7:42

probably would have done all of those different things. And now

7:45

there's still an opportunity I would

7:47

I would have been I would have been there. But at

7:50

the same token, God's timing

7:52

is perfect. When you obey him, he brings

7:54

everything back around. He wastes nothing.

7:56

There is nothing that he's going to put on the inside

7:59

of you that he's going to leave on the.

8:00

Inside of you. Is just about timing.

8:02

And so now is the season where I'm getting

8:04

to walk into a whole bunch of music opportunities.

8:06

People that I love, like.

8:07

Michelle Williams, I'm sitting on the phone

8:09

with So if I had a track, I could text it to you right

8:11

now.

8:12

Did you understand what I'm saying?

8:13

Like, following his purpose leads

8:15

me into the thing that I

8:18

love, and that's a passion.

8:19

Wow. I don't have no title or

8:22

anything in church, but I'm hearing Seki first,

8:24

the kingdom, Oh yeah, I've got.

8:26

In Matthew six thirty three.

8:28

Yes, And then everything else gets at

8:30

it, and a lot of people are

8:32

seeking the things. They're going after the things

8:35

instead of him, and they go after

8:37

the things what I say, instead of the king. And

8:39

the King actually knows the playbook, he knows the lay

8:42

of the land, he knows what he wants for you to do.

8:44

And I've just found in my short

8:46

little life of a

8:48

lot of impact comes from places I

8:50

didn't think it was gonna come from because I did

8:53

it in the timing that God wanted it to happen,

8:55

not in the timing that I wanted it to happen. And

8:58

the more you like lean into that

9:00

and get into that lane, you don't have to worry

9:03

nothing I'm doing right now. I have to hold up.

9:05

I just got to show up like I'm not

9:07

trying to hold things together. I'm not

9:09

trying to finesse and do

9:11

all of these things that a lot of people have to do. And

9:13

that's what causes stress, that's what causes

9:15

burnout, and that's what causes trauma. And

9:18

so a lot of people have to really

9:20

real themselves back in to figure out what's my assignment,

9:23

not just what's my opportunity?

9:25

Well, am I allowed to say your word

9:27

success fueled by the wrong source is.

9:29

Just stress that

9:31

that's it.

9:32

Is taken from damage but

9:34

not destroyed.

9:36

Yeah, you know that's the truth.

9:38

And I'm so excited about that. I

9:41

want to pivot back to something you said about

9:43

assignments versus opportunities. Do you

9:45

feel that's why so many people maybe

9:48

are not fulfilled or they

9:50

don't ever complete anything.

9:53

Yeah, that's exactly the reason is

9:55

because if you're not attached to something

9:58

bigger than you, something that's outside of you, something

10:00

that is for somebody else that benefits

10:02

you, but it honestly helps the world.

10:05

We were built with that on the inside of us,

10:07

Like we were built to be generous.

10:09

We were built to give what God's given

10:11

us away.

10:12

And so many times, like people

10:14

chase after bags and they lose

10:16

the blessing, Like the bag

10:19

is not the blessing. The blessing is

10:21

I'm doing what i was called to do. I'm helping

10:23

somebody, I'm walking in purpose. And so if

10:25

I could give any message to my peers

10:28

in this generation is like you've

10:30

tried it, You've tried to go after the bag.

10:32

You've gone on.

10:34

Vacations, you catching flights, you

10:36

burkinged up, you got Louie and Dewey

10:39

and gooy. You've done everything, and

10:41

at the end of the day, sitting in that penthouse

10:43

apartner, you still feel empty, Like

10:46

there's no way that that

10:48

was the thing that was supposed to fill you.

10:50

It has to be something else. And that's why I'm telling

10:52

people right.

10:52

Now, a lot of those things that we're

10:54

talking about, they're coping mechanisms

10:56

for trauma we've experienced. If we want

10:58

to be honest about it, like a lot of

11:01

us going after the opportunities and the

11:03

thing is because I don't really want to deal what's going on

11:05

inside of me.

11:06

So let me go and be successful.

11:08

Come on, let me go out here and let

11:10

me try to prove that I'm worth

11:13

something, that I still have value that

11:15

when I post on Instagram with old.

11:17

Boy or old girl like that validates

11:19

me.

11:20

And I'm telling you all that stuff is a quick

11:22

way to just burn out and

11:24

not actually have any real

11:27

fulfillment in life. And so I'm just encouraging

11:29

people like, evaluate what you do for

11:32

real and then see if there's anything

11:34

attached to it. That is traumatizing

11:36

to you, and it's the reason you do it,

11:39

because if we don't deal with the root of it, we'll never

11:41

be able to get better.

11:42

Fruit.

11:42

Listen, I would have say this. There's

11:45

something I was gonna say to Okay,

11:48

let's be transparent.

11:50

Humble, open and transparent. Let's go. Yeah.

11:52

I was gonna go into that too. I used

11:54

to buy, especially cars, every

11:57

time I would break.

11:57

App Yes, everybody not, but

12:00

everybody, I just need to let you know this can This

12:02

may not be your testimony, but we

12:04

are talking to Michelle Williams.

12:06

Go ahead, listen, and my mama, my

12:08

mama, start your amen.

12:11

My mama noticed a pattern. And

12:13

one day I bought a car and she said, who'd

12:16

you break up with? And

12:19

so I had to trauma

12:22

wise, what was in me

12:24

that was trying to replace something

12:27

that's gone on, something that's

12:29

left. Now, when you get on

12:31

assignment and you get in purpose the

12:34

things that you thought you even wanted, you

12:36

don't even want him no more.

12:38

You don't even want it no more.

12:39

You don't

12:41

want him her or the car.

12:45

You don't.

12:46

You don't.

12:47

So, by the way, and I didn't read

12:49

the room. I did not say that to to flex,

12:53

I pray on my heart.

12:54

No, that's her real life. Everybody that that was

12:56

her real life. Okay that that that may

12:58

not be your real life, but that's her.

13:00

Well some of y'all.

13:01

You you might be standing in the

13:03

Michael Kors line, the Louis Maton line

13:05

to get their purse to get.

13:08

Or or Michelle they may they

13:10

may be in front of the refrigerator. Because

13:13

the truth of the matter is, many times,

13:16

a lot of the things that we put in our mouth

13:18

are because of what we don't have.

13:19

In our lives.

13:20

Yes, sir, a lot of times

13:22

it's it's we're eating I'm gonna get some cake

13:24

because I'm gonna feel good today, Like I'm

13:26

gonna I'm gonna go have me

13:29

a double dip of whatever

13:31

this ice cream is and I feel better because

13:33

they say it's vegan.

13:34

But that don't take the sugar out of it.

13:35

The under sad what I'm saying, And the

13:37

truth of the matter is a lot of

13:39

times we need to evaluate what we put in

13:41

because what we don't feel like we have within that

13:45

is a real value

13:47

metric that everybody needs to evaluate.

13:50

More clothes, more friends,

13:52

more opportunities, more success. Do you

13:55

actually need more or are you trying

13:57

to feel a god hole is what I call it,

13:59

with things that will never be able

14:02

to fit in that space in your life.

14:05

And y'all listen, don't be like me, because

14:07

I was always upside down in every trade

14:10

because the Lord didn't want me. It never

14:13

worked out for me, you know, always

14:15

trying to replace stuff. So don't

14:17

do that, y'all. To finish out the loan, finish

14:19

out the least of the thing, and it's so you won't

14:22

be upside down. And really the lesson

14:24

is we dig ourselves into financial

14:26

holes, we dig ourselves into emotional

14:29

pits and stuff like that. So

14:31

fine purpose get healed,

14:34

so that way we're not trying to replace stuff.

14:36

You said some things that were also snippets

14:38

to y'all. I gotta keep talking about the book

14:41

I personally passed through my TID.

14:43

I asked for an advanced copy

14:46

of the book because they

14:49

got it to me, and because I despise

14:51

when I write a book or put out music,

14:53

the person that's interviewing me, they don't read or

14:56

listen to it, and then they got to ask me dumb questions.

14:58

I appreciate that, so I want the interview,

15:00

to go beyond what surface. What

15:02

we can google, you can't get a book get

15:05

So there are some things. I won't give

15:07

the book away, but it really

15:09

you can give it away.

15:10

You can give it away. I

15:13

want them to be here.

15:14

Listen. It touched me so much,

15:17

damaged but not destroyed, from trauma

15:20

to triumph. You talk

15:22

about so much, you're

15:25

so honest. I just transparent,

15:28

and you get so vulnerable. You

15:30

get so vulnerable, y'all the

15:33

endorsements preached.

15:39

I got some good friends, I got some good endorsements

15:42

preach.

15:42

Okay, so y'all get the book so you can know

15:44

what I'm talking about, and you'll be like, okay, I gotta get a chapter

15:47

one. But let me let me tell you what I said.

15:49

I said, you are very honest, transparent, and

15:51

you get very vulnerable in this book, to

15:53

the point where I read

15:55

the book with one hand over one eye A

15:57

little bit. Yeah, because when someone

16:00

gets there's a difference between vulnerable

16:02

and being transparent. Being

16:04

transparent is yeah.

16:07

I used to buy cars when I would break up with people.

16:10

But being vulnerable, being vulnerable. You

16:12

tell how you felt about the thing. I felt

16:14

like crap, I felt horrible. I

16:16

felt used, I felt less than

16:19

and you say all so many

16:21

things about yourself, yourself aware,

16:23

you don't blame shift and blame anybody

16:26

else. And it

16:28

also rattled a thing or

16:30

two in me that let me know, Sis,

16:33

oh you need to process this hit. You

16:36

took a little more.

16:38

This is actually I'm getting

16:40

goosebumps because this is the reaction that

16:43

I wanted, because I said, if somebody's

16:45

gonna get healed, you know, when

16:47

you're going through something and you're like,

16:50

well, who's gonna go to the dance floor first? Like

16:53

it's a party, but everybody's standing on the side

16:55

and the music is going, and everybody looking who's.

16:57

Gonna go to the buffet line? Because you don't want to look greedy?

17:00

Yeah, who's gonna do it first? Yeah?

17:02

And everybody hungry and everybody

17:04

is hurting, But who's gonna go first?

17:07

And And for me, even

17:09

with the position that I hold this pastor

17:11

many times pastors we put

17:13

it on people we know y'all are struggling with and

17:16

we know y'all a da da da. And I was like, I want

17:18

to take a whole different approach. I'm gonna put

17:20

myself on blast. I'm gonna I'm gonna

17:22

say everything that the Lord has been doing

17:24

in me from the time of two

17:27

years old all the way up to almost

17:29

forty. I want to use this as

17:31

a playbook. This is the book that people write when

17:33

they're seventy. And I said, the

17:35

problem is it's too far removed

17:37

from when I need to do the work. And so

17:39

I want to remember this fresh and I want

17:42

I want to hopefully inspire somebody to

17:44

do the work, because the life on the other side

17:46

of doing the work of walking out

17:48

this healing journey, It's like my life went from black

17:50

and white to color. And I

17:52

tell people in the book, I said, there's nothing like

17:54

a hit you don't see coming. And

17:56

many of us don't recognize

17:59

that A lot of the things when we're

18:01

one hit away from totally breaking because

18:03

we haven't dealt with none of our issh excuse

18:05

me for my language, but I'm just telling

18:07

you that some of you are

18:10

one disappointment away, one frustration

18:12

away, one job loss away, one

18:15

breakup away from your whole world

18:17

crumbling. Not because it has to, it's me

18:19

because you've been holding so much stuff together

18:22

that you have not really dealt with. You've

18:24

pushed it down you've

18:26

buried it. You visit your family every

18:28

Thanksgiving and every Christmas with problems,

18:31

but you never say anything. And when you get

18:33

in the car, you just cuss and scream

18:35

and get frustrated. There's so much

18:37

on the inside of us, but we're not letting

18:40

that thing out in a way that would be

18:42

healthy. And I'm just telling people, like, listen,

18:45

this is the season where you allow

18:48

everything that's happened to you no longer to

18:50

find you.

18:51

But you cannot ignore it. You gotta face

18:53

it.

18:54

You gotta walk up to it and say you are

18:56

no longer the thing that will

18:58

be able to put me in my ship.

19:00

I'm gonna deal with you.

19:01

I'm gonna handle you, and with God's help

19:03

and God's grace and counseling and community

19:06

and being honest, those things can

19:08

actually turn your pain into

19:10

your platform. I'm here talking about

19:12

all the crap that I went through and

19:15

it's going to help people and it's

19:17

gonna see me and.

19:17

My wife on vacation.

19:19

So I'm just saying, like, the pain can

19:21

become your platform, and God can use

19:23

all of your trauma and turn it into your trump.

19:25

Come on, listen, listen, y'all,

19:28

y'all should see my posture. I'm making

19:30

that ugly face you make in church when the pastor

19:32

is just dropping gems. And that that's

19:34

another thing I want to say when you. When

19:37

I was reading reading

19:40

your new book, first of all, I want

19:42

to say, I was reading it in your voice,

19:44

because you have to.

19:45

You got you gotta.

19:46

Read it in his voice, in his manner

19:48

asm. And then there's a portion in

19:50

the book where I was like, oh, he preaching,

19:52

and I read it. I was like, oh, I'm gonna

19:55

take this, and I'm a hoop with a little bit.

19:56

So I'm there you ready to go ahead and do it?

19:58

So listen because then your the book you say that no matter

20:01

what happened to you, no matter who hurt you, no

20:03

matter how you feel, I want you to

20:05

know if this value is still in you, touch it ever

20:07

say say it's sin, you a sin, it's.

20:09

Genuine, send you, it's sending you, it's send you to

20:12

It is in.

20:13

You, and so thank you. I thought I

20:15

went to enough therapy and I volunteer

20:18

at a healing retreat. But again, damage

20:20

but not destroyed definitely, says sus.

20:22

You need to unpack this, you need to

20:25

process this. Now,

20:31

remember I said, we got to read the book

20:33

in your voice. Will there be an audiobook?

20:35

There is already an audio book.

20:38

It is done, it is finished.

20:40

I gave you my whole thing. When I write a book

20:43

or when I do something. I was never a big book

20:45

reader when I was younger. I

20:47

like to watch things. I like to see them. I

20:50

like to visualize it. And

20:52

as I got older and got into the professional pastoring

20:55

and had to open businesses and do anything,

20:57

reading is fundamental. You got to be able

20:59

to read. So I started reading a lot more.

21:02

But one of the things that I realized is

21:04

that you can read in a way that it seems

21:06

live like, it seems real.

21:08

You can put the picture in people's mind.

21:10

And so for anybody who's not a big reader, I'm

21:13

telling you, when you read this book, like Michelle

21:15

said, you'll see it. You'll

21:17

hear me, You'll see it. It's

21:20

vivid. I pull on cultural

21:22

things to be able to bring your mind to where

21:25

I'm at, and I think it's all

21:27

important so that we can actually get

21:29

the message. And I really do believe the

21:31

message of my life is no matter how

21:33

much you've been damaged, they're still value in

21:35

you. I literally had somebody Michelle,

21:38

give me a gift that was a

21:40

regift. It was an expensive

21:42

gift, but the box was jacked up and

21:45

the wrapping paper was messed up. And

21:48

the truth of the matter is is that no

21:51

matter that the wrapping paper was ripped

21:53

and the box was tattered, the value

21:56

of that gift was in the content

21:58

that was inside of it.

22:00

And so many people.

22:01

In this life, they've had

22:03

their relationships ripped up, they've

22:05

had their character scarred

22:08

and marred.

22:08

But the truth of the matter is who God's really

22:10

created you to be.

22:11

That essence of who you are is

22:14

still good and is still valuable,

22:16

And the price of the thing

22:19

did not change because the box or the

22:21

rapping was jacked up. You take those

22:23

things out that God has placed on the inside

22:25

of you, and you got to realize that the value

22:28

is still in you. And that's my encouragement

22:30

to people who've lost, who've gone through

22:32

divorce, who've had bad relationships,

22:35

who have not been able to see the success that they

22:37

wanted to see. Yeah, you got some scratches,

22:39

and you've got some ribs, and you've got some tatters,

22:41

but I promise you who you really are

22:44

the most valuable part of you is

22:46

still waiting for the

22:48

world to see it. And if you

22:50

would allow yourself to heal

22:52

from some of the things that have happened, I promise

22:54

you you're gonna be able to help so many people.

22:57

Listen, everything that you need

23:00

is on the other side of

23:02

your healing. And we

23:04

talked about loss. I wanted to ask

23:06

you definitely how what

23:09

you're saying can also apply to grief,

23:12

but you kind of touched it a little

23:14

bit.

23:15

I'm touching it because I feel

23:17

the audience that is listening to this, and I

23:19

know that many people have lost things. I

23:22

mean, we're coming we're three years removed

23:24

from COVID, where that literally

23:26

shifted the life of so

23:28

many people, whether it was you lost an

23:30

actual loved one, you lost business,

23:32

you lost money, and that was a time for

23:34

some people that they gained a lot, but they lost

23:37

priority and they lost

23:40

focus. So you got a bunch of money,

23:42

but your children got lost in the mix of all of

23:44

that stuff. A loss comes at a lot

23:46

of different ways. The thing that you have

23:48

to understand is the fact that you're

23:50

still existing does

23:53

not mean that you're actually thriving.

23:55

And a lot of people I'm finding are

23:57

existing, they're going through the they're

24:00

doing what's necessary, but they're not actually

24:03

living the life that I believe God intended

24:05

for them to live. And that's why I

24:07

think trauma makes you numb like

24:11

that's what it does. It makes you not

24:14

feel the things that you actually feel.

24:17

And just think about a car accident. A lot of times

24:19

when if you ever get in a car accident, and I pray

24:21

nobody does, but if you've ever been in one, you

24:24

can sometimes jump out of the car on adrenaline.

24:26

You don't feel what's going on. Oh

24:29

no, no, no, I'm fine. I'm fine, I'm fine. Everything

24:31

is moving, but it's not until you sit

24:34

still. It's not until you get

24:36

into a relaxed position. It's not until the heightened

24:38

moment passes that

24:41

you actually start to feel

24:43

what happened. And may I submit to

24:45

us that many of us are so busy that

24:47

we never let ourselves get into the point where

24:49

we can feel it. We stay so inebriated

24:53

with being outside and

24:56

going from event to event and

24:58

being in relationship to relationship. You're

25:00

in your third relationship in two years,

25:03

and you never hear from the one before it,

25:05

and so you're moving trash to another

25:08

area that would have and could have been

25:10

good. But you're taking the toxic into

25:12

the next And God is saying to many

25:14

people that are listening right now, could we just get

25:17

rid of some of the weight, some of the damage.

25:19

I'm not saying that it all got to change today, but

25:21

let's go on a journey of dealing with this thing. And

25:23

because of loss, many times people

25:26

think that loss is the end. Loss

25:28

is never the end. Loss gives

25:31

you the opportunity to find a new beginning,

25:33

Yes, sir, And a lot of times the

25:35

greatest things in my life that I lost were

25:38

literally the stages for the

25:40

greatest revelations, changes and

25:43

renewals in my life. But if

25:45

you get stuck in the loss, that's when

25:47

you lose.

25:47

Yes.

25:47

But I'm encouraging.

25:48

Somebody that's listening to this right now,

25:51

don't get stuck in the loss. Don't get

25:53

stuck in who left. This is the season

25:55

where God's saying I got more for you, and there's

25:57

value still in what's ahead of you.

26:00

And that's why your damage can no longer define

26:02

you. But this damage can be the

26:04

thing to push you to destiny. And

26:07

I don't know, Michelle, somebody's pulling on me

26:09

right now. But you are about to give up,

26:11

You are about to stop, you are about

26:13

to throw in the towel. And this podcast

26:16

came on to let you know that there

26:18

is more in you. That you are not at

26:21

the end of your rope. You're actually at the beginning

26:24

of your new life.

26:25

This is a new.

26:26

Season, this is a new day, and

26:28

you may be damaged, but you are

26:30

not destroyed destroy I

26:33

feel.

26:33

It Pastor byke Todd, one

26:35

of the best communicators,

26:39

motivators encouraging men

26:42

of God that this planet

26:44

currently has right now,

26:47

the courage to be honest,

26:49

open and transparent. Everybody

26:53

can't be that, and we need more of

26:55

that in church.

26:57

We got to have it in church. If we don't got it nowhere

26:59

else, we got to have it in church. And that's

27:01

why a lot of people are jacked up.

27:03

But are we really ready? Because when someone

27:05

is honest, open and transparent in church.

27:08

It's wrong.

27:08

It's like, well, what do you want? Do you want him to fake

27:10

it?

27:11

Yeah?

27:11

So the truth of the matter is when

27:14

somebody is honest, transparent, and

27:18

I want to even go a little a little further and

27:20

say like violently vulnerable,

27:23

Like I feel like I'm violently vulnerable, Like

27:25

I try to say it to the point

27:27

where it moves something in you, like

27:29

I want you to understand that this is what

27:32

really happened. And when

27:34

you are like that, what it does and why

27:36

people fight against it is

27:38

because it actually triggers

27:40

something on the inside of them. It

27:42

becomes a mirror and they're like,

27:45

hold on, if they talking about that,

27:48

that means I need to talk about that. Uh, let's

27:50

talk about them instead of talk about me.

27:53

And so that's where comments go.

27:55

That's where people did you hear about such and such?

27:57

All it is is deflection. All they're trying

28:00

to do is make that came too close

28:03

to an issue I might really have that tame

28:05

too close to what me and my family

28:07

may have been dealing with. And so a lot

28:09

of times the natural response the

28:11

Bible says it like this, if you're going to

28:14

point out the spec in your brother's eye,

28:16

why don't you start by taking the log out of

28:18

your own eye. And it's very hard because

28:21

I don't want to deal with this log, but I do

28:23

want to talk about the dust that's over

28:25

there, and that if it keeps it off of you.

28:27

Listen, first of all, thank

28:30

you for the encouragement that you gave

28:32

every listener. Heck, me

28:35

and the producers that are sitting

28:37

on here, thank you for what you just

28:39

imparted into us.

28:42

I want to ask you this question, and I want to hold you. Of

28:44

course, we've got to ask you relationship

28:47

questions, but.

28:48

Mom, I'm here for you. Well, I'm here whatever

28:51

you need.

28:51

It's something that you were saying about how

28:53

we don't like to deal with our own stuff,

28:55

but yet we will. We'll talk about

28:58

what everybody else is going through and to

29:00

make us feel better. I wanted

29:02

to ask you about anger

29:05

and judgment. Yeah,

29:08

when you are angry, why

29:10

does it seem so easy

29:13

to go into judgment of

29:15

others their situation and

29:18

that judgment turns right back around and it

29:20

hits your house.

29:21

Yeah.

29:22

The truth of the matter is anger

29:25

is a secondary emotion and

29:27

it's an easy one. And when I say a secondary

29:29

emotion, it's like, usually anger

29:32

is the thing that I feel after I

29:34

feel something real, like I feel neglected,

29:37

and so I get angry or

29:40

I feel I feel

29:42

devalued, so I get angry. And

29:44

a lot of people have tapped into anger

29:46

because an anger. Studies show that anger

29:48

is an easy emotion to tap into when you don't understand,

29:51

even as a child. So you might not understand

29:53

why your mom left, but it made you angry.

29:56

You might not have understood why

29:58

y'all don't have food, but made you angry.

30:01

You might not understood why they're picking on you for wearing

30:03

that name brand, but it made you

30:05

angry. And so anger becomes

30:07

an ally for many people from a young age.

30:10

And so when anger is your ally,

30:13

what happens is you talk to the

30:15

people you know the most

30:18

because you with them the most. And

30:20

so if anger is the thing that you've been with

30:22

since you were five years old the most, even

30:24

when you don't even want to go to that emotion, it's

30:27

the quickest one that comes up. And

30:29

so a lot of people have to actually

30:32

tell anger that they are no

30:34

longer best friends. We're going to have

30:36

to search for a different emotion to be able

30:38

to express what's going on, because

30:41

when you get into anger, a lot

30:43

of things happen in anger that you don't

30:45

even really mean. Come on, everybody, listen.

30:47

When you get angry, you say some stupid

30:49

stuff, you do, some stupid stuff

30:51

you done, broke stuff that's your own, stuff like

30:54

that.

30:56

Why we create more damage. And

30:58

this is my aunt I'm gonna have to be.

31:00

You don't punch the hole in your own wall, Like,

31:02

what in the what kind of sense do that

31:04

make?

31:05

But the truth of the matter, I'd.

31:08

Rather punch and

31:10

then punch and punch my girl.

31:12

Man, you over ready to push the hole in the wall, bro.

31:15

But the truth of the matter is

31:17

that especially for men that that

31:19

has been an ally from

31:22

adolescents, and if anger

31:24

has been your ally from adolescence, it's

31:27

going to turn into something that nobody

31:29

needs to be walking in rage because

31:32

when you get into rage, you don't understand why

31:34

you do what you're doing. You're just doing things

31:36

and that's where it switches. And so

31:38

a lot of times when you get anger as

31:40

an ally from adolescence, it

31:43

means that if I'm not gonna physically act

31:45

this out, I have to judge everybody that's around

31:47

me.

31:48

I have to.

31:48

I have to show them and tell them, and even

31:50

if I don't say it out loud, I have to have secret things

31:53

of what I feel about them because

31:55

it makes me feel better about myself.

31:58

And this is why I'm saying, especially to men

32:00

out there, man, yo, we are destroying

32:03

families because we are not actually

32:05

dealing with our issues. It hurts

32:08

us and we have been told that we

32:10

cannot express those emotions

32:12

and we've only been given applause

32:15

when we do it one

32:17

way. And I'm telling you anger is

32:19

not the way to do this. We need counseling, we

32:22

need therapy, we need community, we need

32:24

to talk to each other, we need to ask ourselves

32:26

real questions because we're out here putting

32:28

families together that many times

32:30

we're not in because of our issues. And

32:33

at the same time, we're the only ones

32:36

that can fully heal what's been going

32:38

on in this world. And this is what I say to

32:40

people. What's not transformed in you is

32:42

transferred. So everything

32:45

you won't deal with. The Bible talks

32:47

about it visiting the generations, and

32:50

we've seen it. Some of us are angry,

32:52

but it's because our big mama was angry

32:54

and our uncle was angry, and that stuff just passes

32:57

down.

32:57

And so I'm just encouraging everybody.

32:59

If you cannot find within yourself

33:01

to do your work for you, at

33:03

least do it for them children that you love.

33:06

At least do it for that next generation who's

33:08

watching you. Because the pattern is being repeated

33:11

if we do not deal with our data.

33:13

One you actually said transformed

33:16

instead of what's not transform is transferred.

33:19

That was actually something that

33:21

I was supposed to get to, and you

33:23

hit the nail on the head. That's why I know this

33:25

conversation is spirit led. I'm

33:27

so sociaid no, this.

33:29

Is real, so so excited.

33:35

What are your thoughts on what's not transformed

33:38

can be transferred? I'm

33:40

assuming your meaning. So what's not transformed

33:42

in me? If I go and have children, can

33:46

I transfer to them based on how I

33:48

respond to when life?

33:50

Yes, So this is I have four kids,

33:53

and the one thing I can't do with my four kids is

33:55

hide.

33:56

I can't hide. They're with me all

33:58

the time.

33:58

They might be as cool, but they see when I'm

34:00

angry, they see when I'm happy.

34:02

They see I'll respond in.

34:05

Hard times, and they see how I respond in

34:07

happy times. The truth of the matter

34:09

is, if you want to know who you really are, ask

34:12

your kids. I mean, the truth

34:14

of the matter is you know your mama better than your mama.

34:16

Probably know your mama like because like

34:19

they think, they are responding

34:21

yourself. I was good to you, I was like mama,

34:23

you was mean every time you came home after

34:26

word you was mean, and they don't want to

34:28

hear that. And then they start saying stuff like you're not

34:30

going to disrespect me, and they start doing

34:32

all of these things that are generational

34:35

patterns that once I said, so all

34:37

that stuff is dumb. It's all things

34:40

that you do when you have a little

34:42

language of emotion, when you do

34:44

not have a large vocabulary emotionally,

34:47

you say stuff to make people shut down. And

34:50

a lot of times, you think, especially in black households,

34:52

a lot of the language we were told was shut

34:55

down language, shut up before I give

34:57

you something to cry about, you

34:59

ain't really ain't never. I had no problem like

35:01

literally minimizing whatever

35:04

is real to you at that moment, which teaches

35:06

you to not deal with real

35:08

issues like and so the truth

35:10

of the matter is in my living,

35:14

I am teaching my children how to live,

35:16

whether I say it directly or indirectly.

35:20

And so if.

35:21

Every time I'm faced with the hard situation

35:23

between me and their mama, I leave the house,

35:26

they're learning when

35:28

something.

35:29

Gets hard, relationally dip

35:31

like. That's what they're learning.

35:33

And don't matter if I tell them no, you stay

35:35

and you work it out you dah da da da.

35:37

They're going to do what they see.

35:39

So what is what's not

35:41

transformed in me will be transferred

35:44

into them. I cannot be surprised when

35:46

my daughter's in her relationship and she show up

35:48

in my house, Daddy, I.

35:49

Left, hold on you married? Why did

35:51

you leave? I didn't want to deal with it.

35:53

I didn't Da da da.

35:54

And the truth of the matter was she really just that I saw

35:56

you do that with Mammy, and people

35:59

don't have that real conversation.

36:01

And so that's the That's the thing that I

36:03

really want people to understand.

36:05

Like you affect everybody

36:08

around you when you act like it doesn't

36:10

affect you. I'm gonna say it one more

36:12

time. You affect everyone

36:14

around you when you act like it

36:16

doesn't affect you.

36:17

Yes, yes, me.

36:19

And you actually deal with whatever

36:21

affects you. It has a ripple

36:23

effect. And I talk about that in the book,

36:26

like good things can happen and ripple

36:28

out to be able to help so many

36:30

people if you actually deal with

36:33

what hurts you or what what hindered you,

36:35

or what made you like like want

36:37

to stop. Like when you do that, you

36:40

gonna you ain't even met yourself. You don't

36:42

even know you yet, Like I'm telling

36:44

you, it'll change your whole life.

36:47

You know, when

36:49

you.

36:49

Can have the heart conversations

36:51

with yourself and

36:54

have the hard conversations with

36:57

each other.

36:58

Yikes.

36:59

In your book you mentioned I

37:01

don't want to give everything away, but there was something

37:03

going on in your family

37:06

with one of your precious children.

37:09

And you know your wife,

37:11

missus Natalie, She's telling you one thing

37:13

and you're like, no, I'm

37:15

good. But it's like you had

37:17

to go.

37:18

Let's go, let's go and say it. Let's go and say.

37:21

I was I was just saying how you

37:23

had to go get some self awareness to be like,

37:25

my bad, I was wrong.

37:27

Yeah, like I was arrogant. This is the true

37:31

yes, and then be When you can do.

37:33

That, you can go to that person and have

37:35

a hard conversation.

37:38

And that's the thing. Humility starts

37:40

all of this.

37:41

And most people will never reach purpose, not

37:43

because of their performance.

37:44

It'll be because of their pride.

37:47

Like like most people won't reach their

37:49

God given purpose, not because

37:51

they couldn't produce whatever it is, it's because

37:53

of pride. They will not allow

37:56

anybody else to speak into their life.

37:58

You see me now, and I don't see myself.

38:01

And if I had something on my face right

38:03

now and you saw it, but I'm denying

38:05

that it's there. That level

38:08

of delusion keeps me from

38:10

destiny. And that's what a lot of people

38:12

do in their own lives. They don't allow

38:15

anybody to speak because you younger than me, you older

38:17

than me, you ain't got as much money as me, and all this other

38:19

stuff. And one thing that I found out

38:21

is that if I'm going to be healed, I have to

38:23

be humble. Like it's like

38:26

healing takes humility, and that

38:29

is where I think a lot of us have to like

38:31

stop the cart and really recognize,

38:34

like not this fake humble thing that people

38:36

talk about, Like I'm talking about, Can

38:38

somebody lovingly tell you that you're

38:40

mean and you actually evaluated?

38:44

Can somebody tell you that lovingly.

38:47

I'm not talking about going off on you or anything

38:49

like, but lovingly say like you run away every

38:51

time it gets hard and you like what you

38:53

mean, or run away like matter of fact, I gotta

38:55

go. I got a trip to Atlanta. It's like see right there,

38:57

I got you're running away right now.

39:00

You're giving us a lesson.

39:02

I want this conversation this

39:04

is good, I'm not the way.

39:06

And the tone that you're saying,

39:08

Hey, you're mean.

39:12

Yeah, you're hey, And tone

39:14

is everything. Tone is everything.

39:17

If you don't want somebody to hear

39:19

you go off, like

39:22

defenses come up immediately, like

39:24

the way that you approach it, it allows

39:27

them to have an excuse to not

39:29

deal with the real issue, because you become

39:31

the issue. Now, I need

39:33

everybody to understand that. A lot

39:35

of times we want to help somebody, the

39:38

best thing you can do is not become an issue

39:41

trying to help them with their issue. And

39:43

tone is a big part

39:45

of that. And that's why, again, it's

39:48

hard to help somebody when you haven't helped yourself

39:51

because the only reason I can have that tone is

39:54

because I've had to have empathy because

39:56

I've gone through it, and I know somebody

39:59

has had to say to me, hey, you're not

40:01

listening. No, no, no, no, I hear

40:03

what you're saying. I understand it, but you're not listening.

40:05

Like and it's like, what you mean, I'm not listening. I'm like, here,

40:07

I hear you. No, you're hearing me, but you're not listening

40:10

to what I'm saying. And so now,

40:12

oh oh, oh, he did something.

40:14

Go on listening.

40:18

Those are two totally different things.

40:20

Right now, even as I'm here, there's some people

40:22

outside working on different things.

40:24

I hear them, but I'm not listening to them.

40:27

I'm listening to you. Like I hear

40:29

a lot of noise, but I'm listening.

40:32

My listening is where

40:34

I'm focused. And a lot

40:36

of times when we're in specially

40:39

heated discussions or discussions that

40:41

have to do with the soul and our real

40:43

emotions, we're not listening

40:45

anymore. We're just hearing. And until

40:47

you start listening, you'll never actually

40:50

be led to a place of healing. And

40:52

so for me, the reason why I come at stuff

40:54

a certain way is because I know what it is to

40:56

have to deal with issues and have my

40:58

wife or my friend or people I pay.

41:02

Let me just say this, it doesn't matter where

41:04

it comes from. If it's good for you,

41:07

it needs to be received. And

41:09

that's why I said this whole healing journey starts

41:11

with humility. This is

41:13

the only reason I was able to write damage

41:15

but not destroyed. It's because I

41:18

had to humble myself. And the Bible

41:20

says it like this. It says you're

41:22

either going to humble yourself or

41:24

you will be humbled. It's gonna

41:26

happen either one way or another. And

41:29

before I was humbled, and before I had

41:31

to to take losses

41:33

that were unnecessary, I said, let me do

41:35

this work, let me start talking

41:37

to somebody, let me journal

41:40

a little bit. Let me and for me,

41:42

like journaling is not a thing, and for a lot of guys

41:44

it's like I don't sit down in journal. So what I did,

41:46

I voiced journal. I would just start my

41:50

phone on the notes app and I would say

41:52

today, I feel like crap. I feel

41:54

like nobody's for me. And

41:57

I really don't want to go to counseling. I don't want to deal

41:59

with this situation, but I know I need

42:01

to talk about it. And I

42:04

really want my wife to have sex with me tonight, but we've

42:06

been in an argument, so like I don't

42:09

know if that's going. Like I was just being honest

42:11

with myself, honest

42:14

with where I was at. And the

42:16

thing that I tell people all the time, this journey

42:18

in life is about progression, not

42:21

perfection.

42:22

So many people are trying to leave this perfect

42:24

life.

42:25

It's impossible you live in

42:27

this world with all of its issues

42:29

in troubles.

42:30

What you need is.

42:31

To just make a step forward, progression

42:34

over perfection every single

42:36

day. And so as you do that, that's

42:38

how you go from your trauma to triumph. That's

42:41

how you turn your damage into destiny. Not

42:44

one miracle, it's one step

42:46

out of time. And that's why in this book,

42:48

I want to be your coach, Like I have

42:51

gone through it, and I got the scars and

42:53

they have healed now and now I can point

42:55

to them and say, you see this. This is

42:58

why you do this in community,

43:00

because when you isolate and through it alone, that's

43:03

where you can get your a whooped. Like that's

43:05

like like, that's where I want to show

43:08

you so that you can be able to walk this

43:10

out because I believe there's so much value

43:12

still in everybody listening.

43:14

And I feel listen, it

43:17

says it's in you. It's in you, and y'all, y'all

43:19

are so going to enjoy the visuals

43:22

and the diagram of even that

43:24

of the value being

43:26

in you. And I believe pastor Mike

43:29

type because you are on the journey

43:31

of healings, it might

43:33

be a lifelong thing.

43:35

It don't stop, don't stop, it don't stop.

43:37

You know, it does not stop. But being

43:40

an emotionally intune, emotionally

43:43

healthy pastor, I can

43:46

only imagine and get excited to visit

43:48

your church one day to see all the all

43:50

the emotionally healthy people,

43:53

all the people that are starting to get emotionally

43:55

healthy because of what you are willing

43:57

to talk about. I feel like,

44:00

like, ain't no need of us doing all this shouting

44:02

and praising. If you what

44:06

now? Now? You sound like your brother mentor

44:08

Tim Ross?

44:09

That was the first what yeah?

44:13

Were we?

44:14

We we don't need just to do

44:16

something, so we need more deodorant.

44:18

We need to deal with our damage so we can get to

44:20

destiny. Do you hear me?

44:22

Like? Well?

44:24

I I am just

44:26

super super super excited

44:29

for everybody to hear this podcast. I

44:31

am super I want one

44:33

hundred people that listen

44:36

to this podcast. I want

44:38

you to d m me so that

44:40

I can send you damaged but

44:43

not destroys.

44:45

No, Mochelle, all you're

44:47

going to do is

44:49

all you're gonna do.

44:51

Now, let me let me tell you. If you're listening,

44:54

you're gonna d m me damaged but

44:56

not destroyed. You're

44:59

also gonna d m me your name and

45:02

the maling address when

45:05

you do that, that lets me know you listen to

45:07

this episode, So the first

45:09

one hundred people that do that, because we

45:11

are about healing forever.

45:16

I know what the healing power of Jesus

45:18

Christ has done in my life. I know

45:20

what it's doing in the relationships,

45:22

business and personally. And

45:26

I have I, like I said, even

45:28

me reading his book. Since you

45:30

need to unpack this a little more. You need to. You

45:33

need to unpack this a little more. And

45:36

uh, pastor Mike to thank you. It just seems

45:38

like you have fun in everything

45:41

you Oh.

45:42

That's it. We got to. We

45:44

got to.

45:45

I believe that life is to be enjoyed,

45:47

not endured, and I believe that

45:49

the freedom in Christ allows you to do that.

45:52

So that that means you can't listen to a bunch of people

45:54

because they think it's different. But I am

45:56

grateful for you. You are a blessing.

45:58

You are helping so many people right now

46:01

be able to just approach their

46:03

healing journey. And it's because of

46:05

your personality, your words,

46:08

you using your platform. It

46:11

really is refreshing to see people

46:13

actually use what

46:15

God's given them to help people and

46:18

not just throwing money at it or just throwing

46:22

an endorsement, like you're actually

46:24

in here doing the hard work and helping

46:26

people. And I just want to say thank you on behalf

46:28

of all the people that won't be able to be on the podcast,

46:31

which I want to say, thank you.

46:34

Your value is great to our

46:37

world and we really appreciate the work

46:39

that you do.

46:39

Thank you, thank you. And let

46:42

me tell y'all I'm excited his

46:44

book is out right now. His

46:47

book is out now today

46:50

October third, Tuesday.

46:52

It is out, so number one hundred

46:54

people that's gonna hit me. But this book we're

46:56

gonna add to themselves.

46:58

Let's go to be a another.

47:00

New York Times bestseller. I'm so happy

47:02

that the timing of this conversation could

47:05

take place for the release

47:07

date of your book Damage,

47:09

but not this.

47:10

Hey, Michelle, Yeah, let me say

47:12

one thing. Every black

47:14

male needs this book. Yes,

47:16

And I want to say I want to say this

47:19

as well, because I know my ladies they gonna already

47:21

go, y'all are y'all are next

47:23

level when it comes to like emotions.

47:26

Oh, we're gonna get better. Oh y'all

47:28

gonna already do it. My request

47:31

for all the listeners. The back of this book

47:33

is the coolest part. And you can't see it right

47:35

now, but but but this is

47:37

this is a picture. If you see the book,

47:40

it's a picture of three generations of Todd

47:42

men. It's my dad's face,

47:45

my four brothers face, my face,

47:47

and my son's face, and and

47:49

and it looks like me. But it's all

47:52

of us together, which you look like you,

47:54

But you're the sum of all the people that have ever affected

47:56

you. And there are

47:58

so many men who need

48:01

the puzzle pieces of their life put

48:03

back together and need to deal with their trauma.

48:05

So if you're listening to this and you are a man,

48:07

or.

48:07

You love a man, you got a young boy,

48:10

you got a high school student, you got a

48:12

college student, your baby, daddy, whatever, you

48:14

need to get this book because it's gonna

48:16

help them be able to at least start

48:19

seeing the value in trying to

48:21

deal with some of the things that happen to them. And

48:23

I believe when the men and women get

48:26

their health emotionally and spiritually

48:28

right, it's gonna change everything in

48:30

your family, in your community, and in

48:32

your world. Michelle, I love you, dammage

48:34

been not destroyed. Y'all are the best ever.

48:37

Thank y'all.

48:37

Let's go Okay,

48:43

listen, I mean, what do you say?

48:46

What do you say?

48:48

So?

48:48

I hope to the person that feels like

48:51

you've done too much wrong or that you've

48:53

sabotaged every good thing in your

48:56

life, that you are encouraged to

48:58

know that it's not too late. The

49:00

folks that sit on these platforms as pastors,

49:02

or even me with the

49:05

podcast, and who authored

49:08

a book, you know, who's had gospel

49:10

albums out, just I

49:13

hope that you could hear our hearts as far as the

49:15

healing journeys and knowing that

49:18

nobody escapes

49:22

trauma. I'm sorry, nobody

49:24

is immune to Now there

49:26

are some people in my life who say, Michelle,

49:29

I've honestly, I've had a great childhood.

49:31

My parents were awesome. They taught us how

49:33

to be loving, they taught us how to be

49:35

emotionally healthy, and they instilled

49:37

that in us. So I do not want

49:40

to minimize that. There are some people

49:42

who actually have that testimony.

49:44

Yes, that's a testimony, that

49:47

is a testimony. But there are some

49:49

folks who have endured some

49:51

abuse, some trauma, some neglect,

49:54

some abandonments, some betrayal, lost.

49:58

You are trying to find your way,

50:01

so just want you to know that we hear you,

50:04

we see you, and we feel

50:07

you. That's why I passed for Mike Todd. Had

50:09

to take a moment to speak in to

50:12

the person's listening who might feel

50:14

like you're too far gone, that

50:17

too much has happened to you. Or maybe

50:19

you're one who's made

50:22

up team mistake after mistake after mistake,

50:24

and I'm telling you you can

50:26

go from trauma to triumph.

50:30

All right. There's nothing you can do that

50:33

separates you from God's

50:35

love. Okay, all

50:38

right, I love y'all. Checking

50:44

In with Michelle Williams is a production of iHeartRadio

50:47

and The Black Effect. For more podcasts

50:49

from iHeart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio

50:52

app, Apple podcast, or wherever

50:55

you listen to your favorite shows.