0:00

Start your business for the

0:02

freedom of time. Now you're tired

0:04

of the hustle and grind. There's

0:06

gotta be a better way. It's

0:09

time to listen to

0:11

Chill and Prosper. Welcome to

0:13

Chill and Prosper. You're

0:15

ready to chill and prosper

0:18

with Denise Delfield Thomas. Hey

0:21

gorgeous, it's Denise here and welcome

0:23

to another episode of Chill and

0:25

Prosper, where I answer random questions

0:27

from the Chill and Prosper community.

0:29

Now, I love doing these episodes.

0:31

I've mentioned before, I love doing

0:33

them because I don't have to

0:35

prepare as much content. But also,

0:37

I've realized over the last couple

0:39

of years is one of my

0:41

superpowers is thinking off the cuff.

0:43

I love just having those divine

0:45

downloads in the moment. in

0:50

the way that I approach speaking gigs because

0:52

doing things like keynotes and preparing ahead of

0:54

time causes me so much stress. Like

0:56

I get so stressed out about doing slides.

0:58

I always just go, oh, my God,

1:00

what am I going to talk about? I've

1:02

got nothing to talk about. And all

1:04

my imposter syndrome hits. But then as soon

1:06

as I answer questions from the audience,

1:08

I just feel alive and I get so

1:11

excited about it. And so I thought,

1:13

oh, I wonder if I could just do

1:15

that in some of my speaking gigs

1:17

just to say, hey, guys, I don't do

1:19

keynotes anymore. I'll

1:21

just answer questions. And

1:23

even at, I did my Chill and

1:25

Prosper event in Bristol

1:27

last year, and it

1:29

was so much fun. But also, again,

1:32

I felt like all the prepared

1:34

content that I had, it sort of

1:36

kind of went out the window

1:38

when I started just asking people. in

1:40

the audience questions and getting them

1:42

to ask me questions. So anyway,

1:45

that makes me very happy to

1:47

be able to do that. All

1:49

right. So the first kind of

1:51

theme for this episode is around

1:53

money mindset, which obviously is one

1:55

of my favorite kind of things.

1:57

So the first question comes from

1:59

Kelsey, Kelsey Johnson. And her question

2:01

is, how do you get

2:04

through a bad economy with

2:06

tapping? which is EFT.

2:08

How do you get through

2:10

a bad economy with tapping?

2:12

And how do you find

2:14

clients in a bad economy?

2:16

Now, here's where I think

2:18

sometimes my woo -woo and my

2:21

practical side can sometimes have

2:23

a bit of a war,

2:25

okay? Because my practical side

2:27

is like, don't gaslight yourself.

2:29

There absolutely is problems with

2:31

the economy. People are tightening

2:33

their belts. all around the

2:35

planet. In Australia,

2:37

there's interest rates are really high.

2:40

So people are tightening their belts

2:42

in America. There are, you know,

2:44

lots of things going on and

2:46

people are very fearful of the

2:48

economy. And I know this is

2:50

happening in lots of other places

2:53

too. So you don't necessarily change

2:55

the state of a bad economy

2:57

using woo -woo tools like emotional freedom

2:59

technique, like tapping. What

3:01

we use those tools for

3:03

is to comfort our nervous

3:06

system, to try and get

3:08

into a place of equilibrium,

3:10

to fight off some of

3:12

the effects of fight or

3:14

flight or panic that is

3:17

going on, and to give

3:19

ourselves some space to come

3:21

up with solutions. I

3:24

love all personal development tools. I

3:26

love tapping. I teach it a lot

3:28

in my money boot camp. But

3:30

anything can really work for that. So

3:32

whenever I'm feeling panicked about the

3:34

state of the economy or something that's

3:37

happening, I really want to check

3:39

in and see what stories I'm telling

3:41

myself about it. So that's one

3:43

thing that we can do. Because we

3:45

can't control what's happening outside. We

3:47

can only control how we feel and

3:49

the things that are going on

3:51

for us. So it might be... you

3:53

tap on something like, even though

3:55

I feel stressed about the economy, even

3:58

though I feel panicked about the

4:00

economy. And we do that just so

4:02

we can go, okay, a

4:04

Tyrannosaurus Rex is not chasing me.

4:06

I'm not going to die in this

4:08

moment. How can I calm down?

4:10

For some people, that's going out and

4:12

touching grass, getting out in nature,

4:14

going out for a swim, whatever it

4:16

is. So you can say, I'm

4:18

okay. I'm safe in this moment. I'm

4:20

safe in this moment. And then

4:22

it gives you the bandwidth to go,

4:24

okay, now what am I going

4:26

to do about that? So how do

4:28

you find clients in a bad

4:30

economy? That's the second part of the

4:33

question, I guess, is that when

4:35

you have a little bit more bandwidth

4:37

or you're feeling a little bit

4:39

calmer, then you can come up with

4:41

some solutions. So from a practical

4:43

sense, there are always businesses that do

4:45

well in any economy. Always. And

4:47

so there are always people

4:49

who need services, they need help,

4:51

they need, you know, all

4:53

sorts of help, right? And

4:56

so we sometimes have to pivot. I know

4:58

people hate that word, but sometimes we do

5:00

have to think out of the box a

5:02

little bit and go, okay, well, who is

5:04

doing well in this economy and what help

5:06

do they need? So,

5:10

for example, someone I

5:12

know, Jordana Jaffe, her

5:15

pivot at the moment is

5:17

helping people look for

5:19

visas overseas to leave the

5:21

US, right? And so

5:24

her VA agency, her virtual

5:26

assistant agency, has offered

5:28

that new thing, something that

5:30

people really need and

5:33

want in this economy. When

5:40

we're panicked, all our scarcity feelings

5:42

come up. There's no clients. There's

5:44

zero. People are spending zero money.

5:46

And what really helps sometimes for

5:48

me is to go, okay, what

5:51

are my numbers? How

5:53

much money do I need? How many

5:55

clients does that break down to? How

5:57

many clients a month, a week would

5:59

that break down to? Because, you know,

6:01

when someone sort of has a really

6:03

vague goal and they go, I just

6:05

want more money. And more money doesn't

6:08

mean anything. From a practical point of

6:10

view or a law of attraction point of

6:12

view, more money means, you know, yesterday I

6:14

found five cents and I was like, oh,

6:16

more money. We want

6:18

to get specific about that. And also,

6:20

I think the other practical thing,

6:22

which I'll talk about a lot this

6:24

year, is when we are realistic

6:26

about what's happening and also utilizing all

6:29

of our, you know, optimism tools

6:31

and all this kind of stuff. We

6:35

sometimes have to look at what we're spending

6:37

money on. What do we really need? And

6:39

to get very clear on what is going

6:41

to help me to feel safe. You know,

6:43

what kind of level of income do I

6:45

need to feel safe? Do

6:48

I have to watch my spending at the

6:50

moment? And

6:52

I had this realization at the start

6:54

of the year. I went to

6:56

Target. Oh, Kmart, sorry. Kmart's like Target,

6:58

for those of you who don't

7:00

know. Yes, we still have Kmart in

7:02

Australia. And I was just

7:04

kind of wandering the aisles in

7:06

the organisation aisle. And I

7:08

was kind of picking up these organisation things, thinking

7:10

like, is this going to make me feel better? Is

7:12

this going to make me feel better about the

7:14

state of the world? And I noticed all these other...

7:17

women doing the same thing. We were all

7:19

looking at all these organisation solutions going,

7:21

is this going to make me feel better?

7:23

Is this going to fix everything? Because

7:25

there's so many things going on in the

7:27

world at the moment that we feel

7:29

like we have zero control over. We have

7:31

zero control over things that the Trump

7:33

administration is doing that's going to impact the

7:35

whole planet. We have often very zero

7:37

control over what our local politicians are doing,

7:39

except for when we get to vote

7:41

for them every two, four, whatever years. And

7:44

it feels like every day there's

7:46

these fresh new horrors that we have

7:48

to all deal with. And so

7:50

some of us are looking for certainty

7:52

in various parts of our life.

7:55

And I heard Monica Padman talk about

7:57

this on the Dax Shepard podcast.

7:59

I know I feel like I'm going

8:01

off in lots of tangents, but

8:03

trust me, it makes sense. And she

8:05

said that some of us are

8:07

coping with the uncertainty of the world

8:09

by compulsively shopping or engaging in

8:12

behaviors that aren't necessarily. helpful because

8:14

you might feel out of control about

8:16

lots of different things, but you know that

8:18

if you order something on Amazon or

8:20

something, you know it's going to turn up.

8:22

And so it gives us that little

8:24

feeling of control and dopamine that, you know

8:26

what, I can't control all these other

8:28

things, but maybe I'll just feel a little

8:30

bit better if I buy this thing. And

8:33

what I'm trying to

8:35

do at the moment in

8:37

my life is to

8:39

reduce the amount of complications

8:41

and uncertainty. And

8:44

simplify things down to their very

8:46

essence. How can I help people?

8:49

Not trying to reinvent the

8:51

wheel necessarily. How can

8:53

I help people? How can I take

8:55

away distractions from my business, my

8:57

personal life, so I can help those

8:59

people with that particular thing? And

9:01

then being very clear on

9:04

that. Because there are so many

9:06

uncertainties around technology and how

9:08

it's going to impact our businesses

9:10

and lives. I

9:12

know that sounds like it's a really roundabout way

9:15

of answering that question, Kelsey, but how do you

9:17

find clients in a bad economy? The

9:19

same way we find clients in

9:21

any economy is to share what we

9:23

know and how we can help

9:25

people and to make offers. And so

9:27

now is not the time to

9:30

be vague about how we can help

9:32

people or to be shy about

9:34

how we can help them, to get

9:36

very clear on what is in

9:38

our control and what is outside of

9:40

our control. And to

9:42

double down on that and do

9:45

everything we can to have

9:47

a calm nervous system. And especially

9:49

if you're of a certain

9:51

age, like I am in perimenopause,

9:53

I feel like I've got

9:55

much less bandwidth I used to

9:58

for uncertainty. And so personally,

10:00

I'm simplifying as much as possible

10:02

and trying to keep myself

10:04

calm. For me, that is also

10:06

not just doing... like tapping,

10:08

as I mentioned at the start,

10:11

but going to ballet, you

10:13

know? And so I was talking

10:15

about this with my ballet

10:17

teacher and she said, you know,

10:19

she's... she's gay, she's a

10:21

lesbian. And she was saying, you know,

10:23

it's so worrying seeing all these things that

10:25

are happening around the world of more

10:27

intolerance. And I'm really worried for people. And

10:29

I was saying, me too. And I

10:31

said, you know, in the first Trump administration,

10:33

I was so stressed about all these

10:35

things happening and felt so out of control.

10:37

And I had a full on mental

10:39

breakdown. Right. And I said, and I'm so

10:41

grateful that I have ballet now. And

10:43

thank you. for having this amazing adult ballet

10:45

studio so I can come and not

10:48

think about that for a couple of hours.

10:50

And she was like, yes, that is

10:52

my mission. I'm just going to double down

10:54

on that, on having this safe place

10:56

for people to come and do something for

10:58

themselves and calm themselves down. And I

11:00

always leave feeling really good. And for that

11:02

hour, I'm not thinking about, oh my

11:04

God, how am I going to solve all

11:06

the problems of the world? And

11:08

so if you're on the other

11:10

side of that and you have

11:12

a business that can help people,

11:15

solve a problem in their life. Well, double down

11:17

on that. Double down on

11:19

that. Okay. Well, I hope that helped.

11:21

I know that went into lots of

11:23

different directions, but yes, focus on what

11:26

we can control. Okay. I'm going to

11:28

take a quick break and I've got

11:30

another juicy question for when we get

11:32

back. We'll see you in a sec.

11:35

Hey friends, it's Denise here. Let's talk

11:38

about money. Wouldn't it be amazing

11:40

if making money in our businesses was

11:42

just really easy? We create something,

11:44

someone gives us money for it, and

11:46

everyone leaves happy. But let's face

11:48

it, the journey to cash flow is

11:50

often a roller coaster of emotions,

11:52

fear, uncertainty, self -doubt. And even myself,

11:54

I've made millions of dollars and I

11:56

still have those pesky money blocks

11:58

that I have to work on all

12:00

the time. But hey, that's entrepreneurship.

12:02

It's exciting, but it's also overwhelming. You're

12:05

the one that has to make...

12:07

the decisions, you have to set your

12:09

prices, you have to chase payments,

12:11

and you have to tackle all of

12:13

those awkward money conversations. You know

12:15

what? Even after making millions, I still

12:17

face those fears every single day.

12:19

So you are not alone. But you

12:21

deserve to thrive and earn from

12:23

your business. Now, you might be considering

12:25

doing more marketing courses this year

12:27

or changing up your social media strategies.

12:30

And you know what? All of

12:32

those things can help, but the real

12:34

transformation starts with your money mindset.

12:36

So I want to invite you to

12:38

come and join us in Money

12:40

Bootcamp this month, where we'll help you

12:42

shift your money mindset and start

12:44

to clear those blocks. It's worked for

12:46

over 10 ,000 entrepreneurs, and maybe you've

12:48

heard about me from your coach

12:50

or one of your business friends. Now

12:52

it's your time to have that

12:54

change as well. Go to

12:57

denisedt .com slash bootcamp, discover

12:59

what we're all about

13:01

and come and join our

13:03

beautiful community. It's your

13:05

time. Let's take that next

13:07

step together. Go visit

13:09

denisedt .com slash bootcamp. Hi,

13:14

my name is Alejandra Zachi. I

13:16

am a mindset coach. I live in

13:18

the Pacific Northwest in the US

13:20

and I am originally from Argentina. I

13:23

joined Money Bootcamp at the

13:25

beginning of 2020. And it's

13:27

been an incredible last

13:29

three years listening to podcasts

13:31

and reading books and

13:33

also joined Sacred Money Archetypes.

13:35

And I'm a big

13:38

fan of Denise. And she

13:40

has helped me really

13:42

break through money blogs, listen

13:44

to the stories that

13:46

I kept repeating myself about

13:48

why I wasn't making

13:50

money I

13:53

kept looping into

13:55

savings, famine and

13:57

feast. And

13:59

I've recommended Denise to every single one

14:02

of my friends. I would talk about her

14:04

to anybody that is willing to listen

14:06

for that matter. Thank you,

14:08

Denise. It's been wonderful. And

14:10

I would recommend you to

14:12

anybody and everybody. Hi,

14:17

hi, hi and welcome

14:19

back. So this next

14:21

question comes from Marie

14:23

Eve and she's a

14:25

coach. She says,

14:27

great question, how to

14:29

be an abundance coach

14:31

and charge well? or

14:34

enough when you are not where

14:36

you want to be yet financially? Maybe

14:38

sharing about your confidence and abundance

14:40

tips at the beginning of your journey.

14:42

Thank you so much. Well, thank

14:44

you for that question, Marie Eve, because

14:46

it is a question I think

14:49

that I get a lot in lots

14:51

of different ways. And it

14:53

is... This thing about like how can

14:55

I be a coach when I'm not perfect

14:57

is really much what it comes down

14:59

to. I'm not perfect. I've got flaws. And

15:02

how can I help people when I

15:04

haven't got it all figured out myself? And

15:07

there are a couple of ways

15:09

to do this. First

15:11

of all, what I think is

15:13

really important, and I don't think you're

15:15

doing this or anyone who's listening

15:17

anyway, is you don't have to pretend

15:19

to be anything that you're not.

15:21

Because this is where people get into

15:23

trouble. If they're faking a lifestyle

15:25

or faking a level of success that

15:27

they don't personally have, I think

15:29

you can only fake that for so

15:31

long before it falls down. Or

15:33

you just have this underlying imposter syndrome

15:35

all of the time. That's the

15:37

first thing. Of course, you're not doing

15:39

that anyway. The

15:42

other important crux

15:44

of this, I think,

15:46

is I always

15:48

think of Olympic athletes.

15:51

Their coaches are

15:53

not necessarily elite athletes

15:55

themselves. They're not necessarily

15:57

Olympic athletes themselves. Some of

15:59

them are, but you'll also see

16:01

that some people who are... elite

16:04

athletes, they want to go into

16:06

coaching after their career is finished and

16:08

they're not necessarily good at it,

16:10

right? And that is because that those

16:12

things are separate skill sets. And

16:15

being a coach is very

16:17

different from being an athlete

16:19

or being in the arena,

16:21

right? There's often overlap for

16:23

sure. So it is a

16:25

different skill set. The other

16:27

thing too is that if

16:29

we were only allowed to

16:31

coach and support people who

16:34

were more successful than us,

16:36

where does that lead to,

16:38

right? It's not like a

16:40

pyramid of income or a

16:43

pyramid of expertise because we

16:45

all have different skill sets.

16:47

Now, I have monthly kinesiology

16:49

with people. I go for...

16:52

you know, woo -woo support like Reiki

16:54

and stuff like that. I sometimes have

16:56

therapy and I've never once asked

16:58

them how much money they make because

17:01

it's not important for me to

17:03

get support in that way and to

17:05

look at someone's income. You know,

17:07

someone can be amazing at supporting a

17:09

particular thing. They might be a

17:11

mess in their personal life. They might

17:13

be a mess in their financial

17:15

life, right? It does not matter to

17:17

me if they can offer and

17:19

support me in one particular area of

17:22

life. Now,

17:24

that being said, how do

17:26

you coach someone on abundance but

17:28

you're not necessarily abundant yourself?

17:30

And this is where it's important

17:32

to, like, stick with what

17:34

you know you know. So

17:36

you asked about the start

17:38

of my journey and how I

17:40

started teaching people about abundance. So

17:43

I was very clear on teach

17:45

what you know. Okay. So I would

17:47

be like, hey, I've been doing

17:49

dream boards and this is how it's

17:51

helped me. Can I show you

17:53

how I do my dream boards? Not

17:55

from a place of like, I'm

17:58

the only person who knows this. I

18:00

am the gatekeeper. This is the

18:02

only way to do it. hey,

18:05

this is a tip that I've learned

18:07

and this is how it's helped me. And

18:09

this can help you too. And I

18:11

think what helped me very much at the

18:14

start too is I gave myself permission

18:16

to be a contributor, not a guru. Okay,

18:18

I've spoken about this in my book

18:20

many, many times. This was a real game

18:22

changer for me, a contributor, not a

18:24

guru. A guru knows all. A guru is

18:26

perfect. A guru stands up on a

18:28

pedestal and everyone looks at them. I have

18:30

always been very open about, hey, these

18:32

are mistakes that I've made and these are

18:34

mistakes that I'm still making. And I

18:36

talk about this every single month in Money

18:38

Bootcamp. I say, if you've just joined

18:40

today or someone who's been here for 12,

18:42

13 years, we are all the same

18:44

because we're all learning and growing all of

18:46

the time. And I make mistakes. all

18:48

the time. And what we bring to this

18:50

together is a curiosity. And what I'm

18:52

bringing is a container, a safe space for

18:54

us to talk about these things. Not

18:56

from me being the expert and the perfect

18:58

person, but me going, hey, let's have

19:00

some curiosity about this. Oh, and have you

19:02

thought about this? And have you thought

19:04

about that? I think

19:06

giving myself permission to go, I

19:08

don't have to be the perfect

19:10

person around this. I don't have

19:12

to become a financial advisor to

19:14

be able to talk about money.

19:16

I'm allowed to contribute to this

19:18

conversation. That can really help. And

19:21

so think about how you

19:24

can support people at all levels

19:26

with that. And sometimes

19:28

that is permission for people.

19:30

Sometimes it's holding space. I

19:33

think as the more successful you

19:35

get, sometimes it is hard to

19:37

find people who will hold space

19:39

for you without all of their

19:41

money stuff coming into place. So

19:43

if you can try and work

19:45

on becoming someone who tries to

19:47

be neutral around money, is actively

19:49

working on your own stuff, then

19:51

you can hold space for people

19:53

without making it mean anything about

19:55

you. And I've felt the difference.

19:57

I know it's really subtle, but

19:59

I felt the difference when someone

20:02

hasn't worked on their money stuff, I

20:04

feel very unsafe. And an example

20:06

could be someone who's very... like

20:09

fearful about sending me an invoice and all this

20:11

stuff's going on in their head. And I'm just like,

20:13

can you just, don't be weird. Can you just

20:15

send the invoice? Can you just hold

20:17

space for me? Or someone who has a

20:19

lack of boundaries can make me feel very

20:21

unsafe because then I'm like, I have to

20:23

check the time because they're not checking the

20:25

time because I don't have boundaries around time.

20:27

So I have to be the grown up

20:29

here. Makes me feel unsafe. Yeah,

20:33

I hope that helps. You don't have

20:35

to always be more successful than your

20:37

clients. But if you do want to

20:39

work with higher wealth individuals, sometimes there

20:41

is some little things that you might

20:43

need to clean up. You might have

20:45

to make things very easy and efficient.

20:50

Yeah, because sometimes people

20:52

have more money than time. But

20:55

you don't have to be

20:57

anything that you're not. Okay,

20:59

I hope that helps. I

21:01

love that question. Okay, a

21:03

question from Carrie Setford, who

21:05

is a therapist. How

21:07

can I stop people being so

21:09

embarrassed when I talk about money?

21:12

Oh, I love this one. How

21:14

can I stop people being so

21:16

embarrassed when I talk about money?

21:18

This is a really great question.

21:20

What I like to role model

21:22

for people, which I think helps

21:25

them feel more comfortable, is to

21:27

what my money mindset mentor helped

21:29

me with. That

21:32

is to, sorry, and this is Kendall

21:34

Summerhawk. I'm like blanked on her name

21:36

for a second. Kendall Summerhawk

21:38

is one of my money mentors. She said

21:41

talking about money should be like saying,

21:43

can you pass the salt? Like

21:45

just easy and breezy, right? You'd never be

21:47

sitting there going, well. Maybe if you're an

21:49

overthinker, oh, my God, they're going to think

21:51

I'm so horrible and terrible for passing. So

21:53

I should have brought my own salt. Oh,

21:55

my God, why haven't I made my own

21:57

salt? Like just to be

21:59

able to say, hey, you know, can

22:01

you pass the salt? And so that

22:03

is a practice in yourself to just

22:05

be able to say, oh, and what's

22:07

the price? Or here's the price, you

22:09

know, or like just to be able

22:11

to just have easy breezy conversations about

22:13

money. This can

22:15

feel really weird. So sometimes we have

22:17

to unpack in our own childhoods what

22:19

we were taught about talking about money.

22:22

So if you were taught from a

22:24

young age, oh, my God, it's so

22:26

inappropriate to talk about money. You should

22:28

never talk about money. It's so rude.

22:31

Then, of course, going to feel weird about

22:33

it. of course you're going to second guess

22:35

talking about it or you're going to say

22:37

it in a hushed voice. And so the

22:39

more we can just confidently talk about it. The

22:42

other thing too is being very mindful

22:44

about how we talk about other people's money,

22:46

other people's prices, and to be like,

22:48

hey, good for them, you know, instead of

22:50

always sort of going, oh, what a

22:52

bitch. Oh, I can't believe what they're charging.

22:54

Can you believe what they're charging? Who

22:56

do they think they are? That sort of

22:58

stuff can be really subtle. And

23:00

so you can't really change

23:02

other people. So

23:04

you can role model it, role

23:07

model it yourself and create safe

23:09

spaces for you to talk about

23:11

that. Now, this can be in

23:13

lots of different interactions. Okay, so

23:15

a great example of this is

23:17

my nanny. So,

23:19

you know, she comes and works, she does random hours

23:21

for us. And I said to her, oh, hey, do

23:23

you mind just at the end of, you know, when

23:25

you go home, can you just send me a text

23:27

and say this is how much? this

23:30

is how much it was for today.

23:32

And I said, because I've got dyscalculia, so

23:34

I find it really hard sometimes to

23:36

add up things. Even when using a calculator,

23:38

I'll second guess myself. I don't always

23:40

know when you arrive and leave. It's just

23:42

easier for me to do it. Plus,

23:44

if you text me, then it's an open

23:46

loop like my to -do list and I

23:48

can go, oh, okay, I'll go pay

23:50

it and then I'll respond to that text

23:52

with the confirmation and then it's done.

23:54

And she was like, oh, I feel really

23:56

bad. And I said, babe. I've

23:59

just said you like how much this creates

24:01

ease for me because otherwise I feel really

24:03

bad if I don't know how much it

24:05

is or I feel like I'm going to

24:07

get it wrong. I'm sitting there having anxiety

24:09

about it that I'm screwing you over and

24:11

I just say it's just so much easier

24:13

for me. When you send that text, I'm

24:15

not sitting there going. oh my God, what

24:17

an entitled bitch. I can't believe she's asking

24:19

for her money. I'm going, oh, thanks for

24:21

the reminder. And actually this happened like yesterday

24:23

and she'd sent it like two, three days

24:25

after she worked. And I went, oh, thank

24:27

God, because it completely slipped my mind, completely.

24:29

And I was like, oh, thank God she

24:32

sent that to me. Oh, now I'm going

24:34

to pay it. And I paid it straight

24:36

away. And so I want you to think

24:38

about that too, is any interaction that you

24:40

can have with someone to say, hey, it's

24:42

no problem. You know, it's okay

24:44

for you to ask. It's okay for you to

24:46

say no, or it's okay for you just

24:48

to send it. Then you can be a role

24:50

model and we can be part of the

24:52

solution of making it easy and breezy to talk

24:54

about money, okay? And, you know, and you

24:56

can even call it out if you want to.

24:58

If someone's going, oh, I'm so embarrassed, you

25:00

can go, no, no, don't say that. And it's

25:02

in little subtle ways like... I

25:04

love that my mum did this. I

25:06

love it because I feel like I've been

25:08

role modeling this for a long time.

25:10

My little sister applied for a new job

25:12

and she, you know, she was nervous

25:15

about it and she really wanted it. And

25:17

mum said, oh, when they call you

25:19

for a second interview. And I

25:21

was like. oh my God, that's so good.

25:23

Not if, if you get the job. Mum

25:25

was like, when you get the second interview

25:27

and when you get the job. And I

25:29

realized I've been role modeling that for years

25:31

to her. And also my daughters now say

25:33

that too. They don't say if they go,

25:35

no, no, no, mum, when? And I go,

25:37

oh my God, these little language things are

25:39

so powerful. And so we can role model

25:41

them for others and we can gently call

25:43

people out and say, hey, no, no, no.

25:46

don't have to be embarrassed. That's totally okay.

25:48

And I think especially for younger

25:50

people is really important, especially

25:53

for women, because I think women

25:55

can be embarrassed about that.

25:57

And yeah, and just role model

25:59

it ourselves. Okay. I hope

26:01

that helps, Carrie. That's a really,

26:03

really great question. Okay. I

26:05

think we've got... Time

26:07

for one quick one. This

26:09

is a good one from Steph

26:11

Cole Lewis, who's a creative

26:13

business coach. She says, what do

26:15

you count as a millionaire?

26:17

Cash and bank net worth revenue

26:19

for one year. Now, I

26:22

love this question because I feel

26:24

like it doesn't really matter. I

26:26

know this might sound hard, especially

26:28

if you've got an accumulator type personality

26:30

and you really like certainty. Because

26:32

I feel like as long as you're...

26:34

honest about it all of those

26:36

milestones are worthy of celebration okay so

26:38

my first time that i made

26:40

a million dollars in a year and

26:43

i'm talking about revenue not profit

26:45

for that i was so like that

26:47

is worthy of celebration but also

26:49

all of the milestones are worthy of

26:51

celebration, right? The first time I

26:53

made over five grand in a month,

26:55

I remember my coach at the

26:57

time, Kendall Summerhawk, I went to her

26:59

event and she literally got people

27:01

to stand up and say, who broke

27:03

through $1 ,000 this month? Who broke

27:05

through $5 ,000? And each one had

27:07

like a little award and I

27:09

got like a little award for it,

27:11

like a little trophy. And all

27:13

of those should be celebrated as you

27:15

go through because honestly, making your

27:17

first, like, passive income from your first

27:19

ever product is just as hard

27:21

emotionally and personal development -y as making

27:23

your first million. Okay. So when I

27:25

made that first million revenue for

27:28

a year, I was like, oh my

27:30

God, I've done it. You know,

27:32

a million dollar business. What was

27:34

my profit? I don't actually even

27:36

remember. Like, obviously I didn't spend

27:38

all of that money, but it

27:40

wasn't as important to me because

27:42

it was a mental thing to

27:44

break through that income level. It

27:47

was also a mental thing for me to

27:49

break through the six figure, you know. That

27:52

was a mental block as well. So

27:54

there are obviously, if you talk

27:56

to an accountant, if you talk

27:58

to a financial advisor, there are

28:00

rules around those things. But you

28:02

can have your own milestones and

28:04

your own celebrations about all of

28:06

those things. I have been

28:08

at that multi -million dollar level for a couple

28:10

of years now. And I think at the start,

28:13

I did really like, oh, I'm a multi -millionaire.

28:15

I'm a millionaire. It felt really good. It's

28:18

not as exciting to me

28:20

anymore and I've got different goals,

28:22

but it's totally okay for

28:24

you to get excited about all

28:26

of those as separate goals

28:29

if you want to. A net

28:31

worth goal, a revenue goal,

28:33

a cash in bank goal, like

28:35

a profit goal, all of

28:37

those things are worthy. So I

28:39

know that's probably not, sometimes

28:41

people want that black and white

28:43

answer and there isn't one,

28:45

but obviously, you know. Don't

28:48

lie, but I'm like, oh, I'm

28:50

a millionaire. I always have caveats on

28:52

that too when I talk about

28:54

launch money and stuff like that. This

28:56

was cash in and this was

28:58

cash to come, all of those things.

29:01

I think the point I'm trying to

29:03

make is all of those things

29:05

are worthy to celebrate. And actually, I

29:07

think the earlier ones are almost

29:09

more important because you realize how hard

29:11

it can be to break through

29:13

those early ones. Okay, thanks, Steph.

29:15

Okay, so let's have another quick break

29:18

and then I'll be back for one

29:20

more final thought after the break. See

29:22

you in a sec. Hi,

29:24

Denise. It's Amy here in

29:26

Canada from Mixing Babies and Business.

29:29

I have been following your

29:31

work since I used to live

29:33

in Australia. I now have

29:35

three kids and I really related

29:37

to your work, you showing

29:39

up as a parent in your

29:41

videos. I originally was reading

29:43

your blog and your newsletters, started

29:45

reading your books. I'm now

29:47

a member of Money Bootcamp and

29:49

the biggest lesson... that I

29:52

have learned from Denise that has

29:54

helped me so far has

29:56

been, this is a placeholder. It

29:58

encourages me to show up,

30:00

to take imperfect action and to

30:02

really kind of change those

30:04

limiting beliefs or visibility hangups that

30:06

I may have. So thanks

30:08

Denise for all your work and

30:10

thank you to your community

30:12

too. Okay,

30:15

welcome back. Well, thanks again

30:18

for listening to these Ask

30:20

Me Anything episodes. If

30:22

you do ever want to send

30:24

in a question, all you

30:26

need to do, you can email

30:28

my team, info at denisedt .com.

30:30

And, you know, put your details, put if you

30:33

want to be tagged or not. When we post

30:35

this on social media, you know, ask

30:37

any question. And I'm an open book. I'm

30:40

happy to answer any questions. Answers

30:44

sometimes, though, are not

30:46

always what people want because

30:48

I think sometimes we

30:50

want certainty. And my

30:52

final thought for you is it always, always

30:54

depends. And I used to do this

30:56

a lot when I hosted in -person retreats.

30:58

I'd say to people, ask me any question

31:00

you want. And they'd ask and I

31:02

would go, it's your choice. And I got

31:04

this from my daughter, Willow. She called

31:06

it Willow's Wisdom because I bought her one

31:08

of those magic eight balls and she

31:11

loved it, but she loved that one of

31:13

it's your choice. And it's very

31:15

profound when you start to hear it

31:17

because I've had people ask me, you know,

31:19

just say, ask me like 10 questions

31:21

in a row and I'll just always just

31:23

say, it's your choice. And after like

31:25

the fourth or fifth time, you see people

31:27

start to tear up because they really

31:29

get the truth of that. They go, it

31:31

is my choice. Oh my God, I

31:33

can choose. Oh, sometimes there isn't a perfect

31:35

answer. Oh, I have that wisdom inside

31:38

myself. And it can be very powerful to

31:40

hear that. It's your choice. It's your

31:42

choice. It's your choice. All I can do

31:44

is sometimes just give my opinion as,

31:46

you know, a very opinionated Virgo. But

31:48

it is always your choice. Okay,

31:50

but always I love hearing the different

31:52

nuances to questions. So please, please,

31:55

please send them in. You can always

31:57

DM me as well. I'm at

31:59

DeniseDT. And if anything in this episode

32:01

resonated for you or it's something

32:03

that you think could help someone else,

32:05

please share it along as well.

32:07

And remember, it is your time and

32:09

you're ready for the next step.

32:11

Okay, my beautiful. I will see you

32:13

on another episode of Chill and

32:16

Prosper next week. Thanks so much for

32:18

listening and it's your choice. Bye. Thanks

32:22

for listening to Chill

32:24

and Prosper. Tell your friends

32:26

to chill and prosper.

32:28

Review and subscribe. We hope

32:30

you had a very

32:32

good time. Hey

32:34

there, it's Denise again. If you're

32:36

enjoying today's show, I highly recommend that

32:38

you check out my bestselling money mindset

32:41

book called Get Rich, Lucky Bitch to

32:43

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33:09

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33:22

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33:31

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33:46

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33:48

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34:01

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34:03

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34:10

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34:12

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34:14

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34:16

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34:23

.com slash books. And I can't

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34:27

and ahas.