0:00

Hey Club Random fans, guess what I did? I wrote

0:02

a damn book. It's called What This

0:05

Comedian Said Will Shock You and it's available

0:07

for pre-order now where you get your books

0:09

or at simonandshuster.com What

0:12

did you think you were going to be when you were a

0:14

kid? Exactly what I'm doing now. When you were a kid? When

0:16

I was a kid. I've literally... Come

0:18

on. Yeah. Club Random.

0:21

After the fight, the doctor might say, he's

0:23

cleared, he's good, and we're like, yeah, no.

0:25

Send him to the hospital anyway. We spend so

0:27

much money on medical. Club Random. Good

0:30

to meet you. Good to meet you too. We actually met

0:32

at an HBO party one time. Many

0:35

years ago. I deny it. I deny it.

0:39

And whenever I did that night, I

0:41

had a friend, my friend Jimmy, he

0:43

had a card made, a little cardie

0:46

hand for me. He said, Jim Vallee

0:48

would like to apologize for his behavior on

0:50

the night of... and then you would just

0:52

fill in the date. No,

0:54

you were great. We talked for a few minutes. That

0:56

was before the UFC blew up. I've

1:00

been a fan for a long time. Watch the

1:02

show since way back when. Oh, I

1:05

appreciate it. So what year was that that we

1:07

met? Like... Fucking had to

1:09

be like, seven. Yeah.

1:13

So where were you then? The thing was, you

1:16

had already owned it, but... That

1:18

was when I first started making money. We

1:20

started cranking. So the Ultimate Fighter aired in

1:23

2005, and by seven we were...

1:26

I want to say by nine, we did

1:30

the deal with Abu Dhabi. We sold Abu Dhabi

1:32

10% of the company in like, 09. I mean,

1:34

I have to say, whether people

1:36

like you or don't like you, and you

1:38

know, people do both as they do with

1:40

me. 100%. Absolutely. But like,

1:42

I'm happy to like everybody.

1:45

You know, I'm trying to get past politics. I

1:48

don't even care. I don't judge anybody by their

1:50

politics, man. That's why we live here.

1:52

That's what this country is all about. Well, I wouldn't go as

1:54

far as to say I don't judge them, but

1:56

because politics is an extension sometimes of

1:59

morality. So I do

2:01

have to judge, but you know what? I

2:03

also judge my own self, my own side.

2:06

I don't think I have a monopoly on everything

2:08

or any side does. And anyway, we don't have

2:10

to get out. What I was saying. I don't

2:13

judge. I

2:15

don't judge people. This is America,

2:17

you can be and do whatever you

2:19

wanna do. I don't like douche bags.

2:21

That's who I don't like. Exactly, exactly.

2:24

No, I know. I think we have that

2:26

in common. And I have to admit, there's

2:28

just, I always thought

2:30

there was a lot on the right and now

2:33

there's just so many on the left too. And

2:35

their level, their type of obnoxiousness is the kind

2:37

of just make you wanna like, I don't know,

2:39

beat the shit out of somebody in an octagon.

2:43

But I was just gonna say, the

2:45

thing you did, I mean, whether people like you

2:47

hate you, you took something and

2:50

made it huge, like on a level, it

2:53

kind of reminds me of Hefner because

2:56

like, it's both things. They

2:58

seem obvious looking back like, oh,

3:01

pictures of naked chicks. You know what,

3:03

this could catch off. I bet you

3:05

I could get some into, yeah,

3:07

I could see, but no, but you did it. Nobody

3:10

always made sense to me. Fighting

3:12

works everywhere, man. Literally, if a

3:14

fight broke out in your front yard right now, we'd both run

3:16

out there and watch it. That's so

3:19

true. We are primal in that

3:21

way. It's well, I guess men. You

3:23

think women too? Women love the UFC.

3:25

Women love the UFC. Well, I mean, we

3:27

say women. Women are different. I mean, you

3:29

know, I mean, women, who

3:32

Gina Carano has the same taste as

3:34

Ellen? I don't think so. But

3:38

when you talk about, this

3:41

thing is broken into pop culture now. I

3:44

mean, when you have the big fight, right?

3:46

Big fight. Total pop culture, yeah. The right fight

3:49

in the right place at the right time. And

3:51

now because of streaming, the world is

3:53

watching. The world is literally watching. The

3:55

UFC 300 we just had this weekend. And

3:58

you name it, man. I mean, from

4:00

world leaders to celebs, to

4:03

sports stars, to my

4:05

real estate agent, a woman down

4:07

in Southern California, everybody

4:10

hitting me up about the fight. Dana, I

4:12

was a kid when Ali and Frazier fought.

4:18

Yep. And I was

4:21

a kid, we got Life Magazine. That's

4:25

true. Life Magazine. And Frank

4:27

Sinatra. You know

4:29

this? Did the photography. Yeah, you did the

4:31

photography. Yeah, of course. I

4:33

mean, just think about that. I mean, like, that's

4:36

what boxing, this is Ali Frazier, of course, this

4:38

is after he'd been barred

4:40

from fighting for three and a half years, because of

4:42

Vietnam. Yep. But, and

4:44

of course, I remember the scenes and

4:47

the shots, it was every celebrity who

4:49

could. And it was in New

4:51

York, all the pimps. Yeah. Oh,

4:53

with their fur coats. And their bad

4:56

bitch. Well, you know what's funny? It's

4:58

that movie, American Gangster, that Denzel Washington

5:00

did. The

5:03

police started getting on his case because they saw

5:05

him show up to the fight. And

5:07

he was wearing a fur and all that stuff. And

5:09

that's how they started to- Yeah, right. That's

5:12

really where that was taken from, right? Because

5:14

that really happened. Yeah. But it

5:16

was so great. The Ali fight to see

5:18

the pinch mingling with, you know, Warren Beatty

5:21

and whoever were the big stars

5:23

of their day. Everybody wanted to be

5:25

there. I mean, again, Sinatra doing the

5:27

pictures, that's pretty good. Incredible. Incredible. But that's

5:29

just- We as human beings, it doesn't matter

5:31

what color you are, what country you come

5:34

from, or what language you speak, we're

5:36

all human beings and we get fighting and

5:38

we like it. And it is a part

5:40

of pop culture. We generally do root for

5:42

the person of our race. I

5:45

mean, that- Listen, my

5:48

thing with that is- Maybe that's changed. During

5:50

my generation, I would say the

5:52

generation before me, I'm 54. The

5:54

generation before me was probably that way,

5:57

but I grew up idolizing, you know,

5:59

black ass- Huge, huge Michael

6:01

Jordan fans. Tyson, you know

6:03

what I mean? We did idolize

6:06

black athletes. But I'm just saying,

6:08

I've only been to one boxing

6:10

match. I was out here in LA, and it

6:14

was Sugar Shane Mosley, I

6:17

think, against, I don't

6:19

know, a Latino fighter.

6:23

And the crowd was a lot of black

6:25

and Latino. And I'm pretty

6:27

sure. Well, that, well, I

6:30

think it's more, I

6:32

think it's more of a, and I

6:34

think it's been a, if you're from England, and

6:37

the fighter is black, and you're white

6:39

from England, you're rooting for the English

6:41

fighter. And I think it's all these

6:43

different countries, but in America, now you're

6:45

rooting for whoever, you know, let me

6:47

tell you what, every white guy, whoever

6:49

fought Mike Tyson, nobody was

6:51

rooting for the white guy. I promise

6:53

you that. Everybody wanted Tyson to win

6:55

the fight. Tyson was the, I'm just

6:57

saying, historically, boxing has been a proxy

7:00

for racial animus. Like,

7:04

I'm not sure that, you know,

7:06

Max Schmeling, just the, That's

7:09

a whole nother fucking long game. They called

7:11

the great white hope. Yeah. Well,

7:14

nobody in America wanted Max Schmeling to win,

7:16

white or not white. You wanted

7:18

Joe Louis to win that fight. And

7:20

I'm sure you're familiar with the history

7:22

of Jack Johnson. Of course. Phenomenal.

7:25

Talk about a bad dude. Phenomenal start.

7:27

To do what he was doing in

7:29

that era. And he didn't give a

7:31

fuck. And paid the price. But,

7:33

you know, he was like, white

7:37

girls. Going

7:39

every, like I am just, that

7:41

was a dude. This whole thing

7:44

about trafficking, that's where

7:46

that started. Trafficking, what do you mean? When

7:48

you really look at what the definition of

7:50

trafficking is, if you could, they

7:53

could get you for trafficking. If you

7:56

invite a woman to another state, you fly

7:58

her out. Oh, right. her. She's

8:01

been trafficked. Yeah.

8:04

That started with Jack Johnson. That's

8:07

how that law came into place.

8:10

Isn't that fascinating? I mean, they made

8:12

the law for him. It could be

8:14

called out. Law was created for him

8:17

because he was, he was bringing white

8:19

women across state lines. Well we

8:21

have come a long way. We

8:23

really have. I agree. That's good to

8:25

hear that you don't think that it's,

8:29

you know, yeah, I'm sure you're right.

8:32

Listen, these days, especially with the UFC,

8:34

I mean, we have fighters from all

8:36

over the world. You'll have Americans chairman

8:38

for Brazilians. When you think about boxing

8:40

back in the day, first of all,

8:42

the big fights would all happen in

8:44

either Las Vegas, Atlantic city, sometimes

8:46

New York and LA Madison's courtyard in

8:48

LA. Right. And

8:51

when we came in, I mean, we do, I'm doing a

8:53

fight in St. Louis. I'm doing fights. We do fights all

8:55

over the world and we have

8:57

so many different fighters. For instance, we had

9:00

a Brazilian in the main event last Saturday.

9:02

Lots of people were rooting for the Brazilian over

9:04

the American. I can

9:06

do a fight in Arizona with a Brazilian

9:09

and a Polish fighter and the thing will

9:11

sell out. Look, everyone, even

9:14

this was by the dog of the woke,

9:16

they would say everyone is somewhat racist. You

9:19

just, if you don't think you're racist, dig deeper.

9:21

Okay. I'm dying. I'm with you on that

9:24

one. Okay. So we're all trying to

9:29

dig. They think I should dig some people too.

9:31

Okay. I'm always trying to dig. Always have

9:33

was raised that way. There's people in every group

9:36

of, of human

9:38

beings that walk the face of the earth. There

9:40

are racist black people. Right. There are racist Asians.

9:42

I remember racist white people. There are racist, you

9:44

know, and I can say this to you. You

9:46

don't have kids. No, but I can tell you

9:49

this. I say this all the time. Nobody

9:51

knows who you are better

9:53

than your children, your children. Um, when

9:56

you were just talking about the thing, dig deeper, Dana

9:58

White, dig deeper. You know. Mike,

10:04

your kids at your house, I mean,

10:06

you grew up in a house. You had

10:08

parents. I was a kid. You

10:10

see the good, the bad, and the ugly. You know exactly

10:12

who your parents are and what they do. And I say

10:14

this all the time. I said, you take

10:16

my kids, strap my kids up to a

10:18

lie detector test and ask them who I

10:21

am and what I'm about. And

10:24

let me tell you what, you'd be shocked

10:26

to find out that there is an eraser's bone

10:29

in my body and that's a fact. I

10:32

believe you. But I

10:34

do think you're not right about, maybe

10:36

it's a different generation, but I

10:39

don't feel like I knew my parents. I saw, my

10:41

parents were great because in their generation,

10:44

they just like, like I never saw

10:46

my father like say a word worse

10:48

than hell or damn. And

10:50

sometime later in life, I was talking to

10:52

somebody who was, I would work

10:54

with him in the office. He was in

10:56

radio news and told

10:58

me some stories about him. And of course,

11:03

they said he was very funny, but

11:05

told like really dirty jokes and really

11:07

dirty stuff and had a sex,

11:10

his son. That's where

11:12

it came from. But I never saw that. And

11:14

that's a good point. In front

11:17

of the kids. And some of the, I think

11:19

that's different these days. That is different. Oh yes,

11:22

you're correct. But I mean, that is the place

11:24

I'm always trying to get to, this place of

11:26

reason. I think you're the same kind of person.

11:28

I'm with you 100%. I know. You

11:30

don't want to fight, right? I'm over the bullshit.

11:33

I'm done with all the bullshit. You're not about

11:35

fighting. Wait, who am I talking to? You're all about

11:37

fighting. You're probably a

11:39

fucking billionaire. Are you

11:41

a billionaire? No, I'm not a billionaire. But you've

11:43

made a fucking lot of lolly on this shit,

11:45

right? I've done okay. I've done very well. So

11:48

when people in the press,

11:50

do they ever write what you're

11:53

worth? Because I know they don't. They try

11:55

to. They try to. It's amazing. They just

11:57

won't admit that they don't know how much

11:59

they're worth. You have 100% they just make

12:01

it up. They just pull it right out of

12:03

your ass funny. You say that I saw

12:05

this thing the other day said something on

12:07

Instagram. It was like Dana white

12:09

in 2001 worth, you know, whatever then it goes to

12:12

93,000 that goes to what? It

12:17

gets up to like 500 something million there.

12:19

They have no idea what don't

12:21

believe Anything you fucking

12:23

read don't believe anything you read.

12:26

It's all bullshit man. Everything out there

12:28

today It's like I feel

12:30

like the press is The

12:34

press that's dying it's dying on the vine

12:38

John Jones got into some trouble here

12:40

recently and they said that One

12:43

of my fighters want probably the greatest Fighter

12:46

of all time to be honest John Jones name

12:48

is John Jones. He's a heavyweight and Even

12:52

that name. No, I'm kidding He

12:55

literally Is

12:58

always in trouble always had something going on

13:00

and got into trouble NBC

13:02

News NBC News Put

13:04

out a story that he was arrested And

13:07

he was never arrested. It's just like they

13:09

don't even try anymore. What is this

13:11

vague trouble that you refer? keeps

13:14

getting into a Drug

13:16

testing company we have all of our fights are

13:18

drug tests fighters are drug tested So the testing

13:20

agents can show up at your house or wherever

13:22

you are and they have to know your whereabouts

13:25

Showed up and she said that he threatened

13:27

her So then

13:30

there then NBC News said that he was arrested

13:32

and he was never arrested Now

13:34

back in the day when you were dealing with the media

13:37

They would fact-check they would you know, they wouldn't put

13:39

out a story unless they knew it

13:42

was absolutely true today it's more about

13:44

being first and being right and And

13:49

but when you know obscure

13:51

websites are doing it or Instagram, you

13:53

know Yeah,

13:56

it's another it's another story when it's the NBC

13:58

News well I

14:00

mean, I've been on this for a while.

14:02

There is no difference really anymore because a

14:04

lot of the time is what the press

14:06

is doing is They're reporting on

14:10

What's on social media as if that's

14:12

a story if three fucking morons on

14:14

Twitter tweet something? It's like the internet

14:16

is upset the internet. What do you

14:18

talk about the internet? It's three guys

14:20

who live in their mother's basement and

14:22

they're saying something and then

14:24

but if NBC comments on that Then

14:26

that's a story, you know, they're standards.

14:29

I mean the nightly news you ever watch

14:31

I I Rarely can

14:33

bear it anymore because you get

14:35

like maybe one small block at

14:37

the beginning of actual news But

14:39

it's just headlines and then

14:41

it's right to like whatever cool video we have

14:43

like the nightly news They used to complain all

14:45

the time. They only give us a half hour.

14:47

We would need to inform the people we need

14:50

an hour You

14:52

don't fill up five minutes of worthy

14:54

news Then it's like shit about

14:56

it's always something that happened on a plane

14:58

who gives a fuck a flight out of

15:00

Atlanta Which so what are they all dead?

15:02

No, then because I hear about something that

15:04

matters in the world There's

15:07

no standards and then by the time

15:09

you get to the fourth block, it's

15:11

just the one-legged skier, you know Or

15:13

some bullshit story. So even

15:15

if you think you're oh, I'm one of the smart people I

15:17

watch the nightly news You're getting just the

15:19

tip of the ice break and a lot of

15:21

just bullshit I agree and it depends on which

15:23

news you watch One one news

15:26

station caters to the people that

15:28

want to hear what they want to hear and the other

15:30

one caters to the other That's what we're also the big

15:32

from. I mean, it's not that I don't think there isn't

15:35

truth in Whatever

15:37

I read. It's that it's only half

15:40

the story I'm

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2024. Terms,

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conditions, message and data rates may

18:32

apply. Were you Gen X?

18:34

Yeah, I'm 54. That's Gen

18:36

X, right. I call that the last

18:39

sane generation. I agree with you. Right,

18:41

they were the last kids who were like

18:43

sort of free range. Were

18:45

you a free range kid? Meaning

18:48

you came and went. Whenever

18:50

we wanted to, exactly. Single parent.

18:52

Where'd you grow up? Worked at Boston.

18:54

Boston and Vegas. When

18:56

I was in fifth grade, my mom,

19:00

Vegas was paying nurses more than

19:02

anywhere else in the country. Your mother was a nurse? Me too.

19:04

Oh really? Why was it Army nurse in World War II?

19:08

Yeah, so we packed up the car, moved to

19:10

Vegas. Me, my sister, my mom and

19:12

her dog drove across

19:14

country and moved to Vegas. Wow, moved

19:17

to Vegas. It's like a sitcom. It

19:20

really is. Yeah, it was the greatest

19:22

thing to ever happen to me. I love that city. I

19:24

mean you were able to like walk in the house, walk

19:26

out of the house after school and just nobody like. My

19:30

mom was always at work. And

19:33

she was a nursing. Yeah, and she would pick up extra

19:35

shifts and work overtime and all that stuff. So me and

19:37

my sister were home alone a

19:39

lot growing up. Boston, I'm guessing

19:42

Catholic. Yes. Me too.

19:44

Yeah. Oh. Well I

19:46

know. Did you love it as much as I did?

19:48

Oh my. That's because, that's why

19:51

I'm so, you know, not religious

19:53

these days. Religulous, religious.

19:55

Yeah. Incredible. Oh,

19:58

thank you. Incredible, incredible documentary. I've

20:00

watched it multiple times so you're

20:02

very very well pretty funny. I must

20:04

admit very good. Thank you Yeah, I'm

20:06

so glad I so glad I

20:08

got to do that got that

20:10

and I Wouldn't have

20:12

happened like two years later.

20:14

No movie studio would have touched them Yeah,

20:17

I think I'm always be thankful for Lionsgate at

20:19

that moment being very independent and doing movies like

20:21

that But that world's gone. Look at the places

20:23

you went and things you did at that time

20:25

I know I wouldn't want to

20:28

do that again. No, you would not I mean

20:30

Jerusalem was under attack from Iran the other day

20:33

I know it's like we're back to

20:35

the Crusades What's

20:39

your point of the war to a Christian are

20:41

being blamed by Persians Religion

20:43

is scary and dangerous and that's exactly right. Oh,

20:45

I'm so glad we agree on that Well, you

20:47

know, it doesn't take much more than a Catholic

20:49

upbringing to make you really hate religion. Yeah, that

20:51

right I could not agree with you more. Did

20:54

you have nuns? Did you we had nuns? I'll

20:56

tell you a great story So

20:59

I went so when we moved to Vegas I

21:01

ended up going to a school St.

21:04

Viders, which was like K through 8 and Say

21:08

hi had said the sister we had this

21:10

horrible nun who was our eighth grade teacher.

21:12

She was Evil

21:16

I guess that's the word I would use she was not

21:18

not not a good human. She just

21:21

got busted for the embezzling

21:24

money From the school

21:26

that she works at now for

21:28

gambling. She needed she needed gambling money No,

21:30

and none's are mean. I mean, I'm your

21:32

marriage to Christ and apparently he is not

21:34

putting out. Mm-hmm You got

21:36

that right? That is it. That is a level of

21:39

Anger at humanity and I think you only

21:41

get from never having sex. I mean they

21:44

just seemed And in our

21:46

day it was more, you know,

21:49

it was way more gangster They would beat the

21:51

shit out of you. Yes, they would they could

21:53

do whatever they wanted to do Right and you

21:55

could never even question anything back then. It's

21:58

a really deadly combination when you come by find

22:00

someone who's very unhappy in their life

22:02

from it, very frustrated with

22:05

the idea in their head that whatever they do

22:07

to you is in the service of good. I'm

22:11

turning you into a better little boy,

22:13

Billy Marr, by threatening

22:15

you with hell if you slump in your

22:17

seat or something. They

22:20

seem to really want to scare you. They

22:22

seem to think that scaring a child is

22:26

what's going to help them in life. It was even

22:28

scary. It was the power that they held back then.

22:30

Back in those days, good

22:33

luck trying to tell somebody that

22:35

the nun was a lunatic or the

22:38

priest or any of the

22:40

good old stuff. Were you ever molested?

22:42

No, no, no. Really?

22:44

By a priest? Yeah. No.

22:47

Well, no. Sorry, I guess you were... My

22:49

priest? No. No. You

22:53

weren't a cute kid. Yeah, exactly. No. Definitely

22:56

was not molested. Are you saying you were

22:58

molested? No, I wasn't. I'm saying I'm insulted.

23:00

I wasn't. Oh, got it. Got

23:02

it. But there are cultures.

23:04

I mean, the Afghanistan culture,

23:07

whatever part of it is, we

23:09

found out when we invaded and stood

23:11

there, stayed there for 20 years, there

23:14

are rich men who have like

23:16

10-year-old boys. That's

23:19

just the thing. You can get

23:21

when you're like a rich guy. So

23:24

keep marching for Hamas, kids. You really

23:26

got your liberal eyes on the right

23:29

prize here. Now

23:33

they're cheering for Iran because

23:37

they just fired all the

23:39

missiles at Israel. So Iran

23:41

is the good guys. You

23:43

mean the Ayatollah, the fucking

23:45

black-hearted, black-eyed, bomb-planting dude that

23:48

we captured our people. And it's like,

23:52

I keep trying to tell the left this

23:54

every week. The more

23:56

you do crazy shit, the more you push the people

23:58

in the middle to the right. the right. So

24:01

true. And what

24:04

were your politics when you were 20? I

24:07

considered myself very liberal when I was

24:09

younger. See, look at that. Yeah,

24:11

I was very liberal when I was younger. And

24:14

do you think it's more that you

24:16

changed or more that the country changed

24:18

and the parties changed? I'd

24:21

say it's a little bit of both. Listen,

24:24

I'm for common sense. I'm

24:26

all about common sense. Let's knock all the bullshit

24:28

off. At the end of the day, you know

24:31

what Americans want? Americans want to have a good

24:33

job that they like to go to every day.

24:35

They want to make good money.

24:39

They want to take care of their family. They

24:41

want to raise their family. They want to have

24:43

a house. It's all the simple shit. It's all

24:45

the things that the American dream is supposed to

24:48

provide. That's what everybody wants. And watch people fight.

24:50

Yeah, thank God. Thank God,

24:52

Bill. Well, entertainment. I

24:55

judge almost everything by just how much does

24:57

it entertain me? It's like, you know, I

24:59

don't need art to teach me

25:01

a lesson if it does. Okay. But,

25:03

you know, I'm 68. I probably learned most

25:05

of them or ignored most of them, but

25:08

whatever it is, you know, entertain

25:10

me. And if you entertain me and teach

25:12

me something even better, but first entertain me.

25:14

So I always tip my hat

25:16

to entertain me, even when it's not something

25:19

that I particularly

25:21

understand. It's like you

25:23

got to give it up for success. You

25:26

know, in America, that

25:28

means a lot because, you know,

25:30

we have a lot of shitty things about us,

25:32

but the one thing we still have is anybody

25:34

can reinvent themselves here.

25:37

You know, I agree. One can decide tomorrow.

25:39

I'm going to be this different person and

25:42

do this different thing. And I do have

25:44

a shot. There's nothing really holding me back.

25:47

I couldn't get to get to wherever, you

25:49

know, and it's not likely for most people,

25:51

but it is possible. But I mean, that's

25:54

why they're like, why don't the poor people

25:56

revolt? Because they think they could be that

25:58

the non poor

26:00

people. And they can.

26:02

And they can. Yeah, I'm right. There's

26:04

enough anecdotal evidence. The American dream is

26:07

absolutely positively real. Doesn't matter who you

26:09

are, where you came from, what

26:11

your education level is. If you have the right idea

26:13

and you work hard enough, anything is possible. What did

26:16

you think you were going to be when you were...

26:18

Exactly what I'm doing now. When you were a kid?

26:20

When I was a kid. I've literally...

26:22

Come on. Yeah. Listen, part of

26:24

the reason that I attribute

26:31

my success, getting to where I wanted it, is I

26:33

knew exactly what I wanted to do. I think part

26:35

of the problem... At what age are we talking about?

26:37

You mean like at 10 years old, you knew that

26:39

you wanted to have this empire of... 10 years old,

26:41

I probably wanted to be a firefighter

26:44

or something. When I was 19, I knew what I

26:46

wanted to do. 19? That's so young. I knew I

26:48

wanted to be a comedian when I was 10. Really?

26:52

I wanted to be Johnny Carson and Robert

26:55

Klein. So what I'm saying is exactly right. The

26:57

hardest thing in life is figuring out who you

26:59

are and what you want to do. The thick

27:01

thing you thought... Well, I wanted

27:03

to be in the fight business. The fight business. 100%. I

27:05

knew I wanted to be in the fight business. And

27:08

at the time, you know, you're

27:11

taking 1988, probably the dumbest idea ever, but that's

27:13

what I wanted to do. I got up every

27:15

day and that's all I ever focused on. The

27:17

problem is what most of these young people is,

27:20

and it's unfortunate, they don't know what they want to do.

27:22

Kids today. Am I

27:24

right? Yeah. Even

27:27

when we were young though, when we were young,

27:29

the hardest thing in life to figure out is

27:31

who am I and what do I want to do

27:33

for the rest of my life? These kids go to college and

27:35

if you talk to most kids and ask them what their major

27:37

is, well, I'm majoring in this, but I'm thinking about switching over

27:39

this because they don't know. But

27:41

once you know and you zero in on it

27:43

and you start working every day to

27:46

achieve that, it's much easier than you

27:48

think it is. Well, also the

27:50

problem is that the kids, I think

27:52

very often they go to these, especially

27:55

at these elite colleges, they're

27:57

not really taking anything or learning anything that

27:59

would help them. I. Practically

28:01

in life and will disagree if

28:03

you if you major in queer

28:06

poetry of the Asian diaspora. You

28:09

know, she said sits and immediately

28:11

recommended cells to whatever is gonna

28:13

come next. Right in I'm i'm

28:15

exaggerating and corps but like there

28:17

is, just as I read the

28:19

stats on like. Our.

28:21

Kids and how many them take. I'm

28:24

when they called the stem fields science,

28:26

technology, engineering, mechanics. you know, right? Which

28:28

luck on the first one To admit

28:30

I don't do that shit. I can't

28:33

do sauce. it's into of the a

28:35

jury miss. I'm really bad at it.

28:37

I definitely didn't but like people have

28:39

to, I recognize how important it is.

28:42

Like videos, the most important thing and

28:44

under say and the Chinese kids. Do.

28:47

A lot more that and we take a

28:49

lot more about with you know, film studies.

28:52

I. Agree And. Yeah. Yeah,

28:55

I don't disagree. I'm obviously China

28:57

and India. You know of the

28:59

gun, all the all the. Technology.

29:02

And know, smart kid shit on lox.

29:04

Ah, and Americans, we just kids and

29:06

dumber and dumber, right? And. I. Mean

29:09

the I'm again. The great

29:11

thing about America? still? But.

29:14

Like. Like could this could end soon?

29:18

And. Then saying who might be discussed

29:20

responsible for any and but this good

29:22

ensuing we are still a beacon. For

29:25

people on com and so like

29:27

even if it's lately Indian and

29:29

chinese kid the smartest ones are

29:31

over there. We would brain drain

29:33

them here. I mean people from

29:35

all over the world. I must

29:37

still goes on. but it could

29:40

end. We could become toxic America

29:42

where even that and and I'm

29:44

sure it has amd to some

29:46

degree already because. We.

29:48

Do not present ourselves as

29:51

stable anymore. You. Know we

29:53

used to be like even when we

29:55

weren't like graded everything we were you

29:57

know we're or share it. We're

30:00

like bowling Green is that reflects

30:02

on what good mojo with the

30:04

police tape outside. You know I

30:06

agree with you. Yes, we just

30:09

don't present as stable and the

30:11

and if we don't for so

30:13

we lose the dollar been preeminent

30:15

which. The. Dollar is still king.

30:18

You. Must know this huge up or you

30:20

overseas a lot of that's all we a

30:22

the Us Minerva of a performance institute in

30:24

China just doesn't want to mess. Scouts have

30:27

one in the Middle East year prison and

30:29

I have one in Las Vegas. So you're

30:31

always on a jet go into a travesty

30:33

that his room that's tough on your own.

30:36

Yeah oh yeah yeah that's I started taking

30:38

my how serious couple years ago. I know

30:40

De Blasio better than I've ever felt my

30:43

entire life. York very healthy Asia and when

30:45

you're going to be a bouncer at a

30:47

Trader Vic's the sex. Acts

30:49

as a for you are not a fighter

30:51

yourself ready like I did. I've I thought

30:53

when I was younger are not ever be

30:55

like look like a guy who's been inside.

30:58

We. We we identify Vance and since since

31:00

I was young kids I'm but if I

31:02

was in a bar I wouldn't want to

31:04

fight you. His family were that were as

31:07

it's I I might want to fight anybody

31:09

but you have a seat or look like

31:11

a guy who would do well in the

31:13

I. I don't want to fight anybody anymore

31:15

either. Manager signing is gross. Yeah I'm I'm

31:17

A. I'm a displaced. My lies you know

31:19

professionally and personally were any type of negativity.

31:22

I just I cut it out of my

31:24

life in and ever wish him even of

31:26

my business sites I want to be in

31:28

business. With people that I'm aligned with and we

31:30

think alike And so you know, We. Want

31:32

to work together and and and you help me

31:34

and I help you and we run our business

31:36

and swing. I'm done with all the bulk. Of.

31:39

All the world bullshit and does. All

31:41

the games and all that the

31:43

media fuckin gotcha bullshit mates and

31:45

on. And on. I'm definitely down

31:47

with all that. Much. Every

31:51

dallas done with all know what books bullshit

31:53

anyway. but. When. You're when you're

31:55

watching a fright. Money

31:58

or fights? Are you a little. bit shitting

32:01

in your pants because

32:03

what if somebody gets hurt always

32:06

always shitting in your pants? Come

32:10

on everybody that's my interview

32:12

with Dana White. Think

32:16

about this as brutal and as

32:18

tough as

32:21

the sport is right? That's

32:33

a tough brutal sport. There's never been

32:35

a death or serious injury. Is that right? In

32:37

30 years of doing the USA

32:40

on average four to five boxers die a year.

32:43

Why is that? Because

32:45

we spend the money. We spend on what? On

32:48

making sure that you have two healthy athletes that go

32:50

in there. Making sure the right medical

32:53

attention is there and after. I mean there will be

32:55

fights and when you say are you sitting there shitting

32:57

your pants. I'm watching a fight.

33:00

We have the greatest medical staff right?

33:03

After the fight the doctor might say he's cleared he's

33:05

good and we're like yeah no. Send him

33:07

to the hospital anyway until full. We

33:09

spend kind of like so much money on medical.

33:11

Kind of like what football did with the protocols

33:14

where the guy goes into the tent. Except the

33:16

difference is that there was no secret that getting

33:18

punched in the head is not good for you.

33:20

It's very bad for you. That helmets don't protect

33:22

you. This

33:25

is a rough sport and

33:27

we made sure that we overspent on

33:30

medicals from day one. Making sure that

33:32

everybody's healthy. All right.

33:34

What do you think of this idea? At the

33:36

Trump Biden debates. At

33:39

the tent. On

33:41

both sides you know like in the football on

33:43

the sideline where they have to go into the

33:45

blue tent. And

33:47

when one of them really. I

33:53

don't even know what you said. What did you

33:55

say? I think somebody may say something stupid. They

33:57

have to go into the tent. Check

34:00

their brain. Have

34:02

you ever searched for anything online that you'd want

34:04

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34:06

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34:08

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34:11

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34:15

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the place to be and May 19th

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at the Palace Theatre in Albany New

37:12

York. I'm always interested

37:15

in like um moguls

37:17

and like when they when their empire you

37:19

know it's like I'm not an

37:21

empire person I you know do my show and

37:23

this is a great sideline but this is only

37:27

the only time I spend on this is when

37:29

I'm right here. You thought you are though I

37:31

disagree with you you are a empire mogul

37:33

guy if you look at

37:35

if you look at where you came

37:38

from you came from exactly you came

37:40

from Comedy Central you went

37:42

from Comedy Central to getting it to

37:44

getting one of the

37:46

most powerful shows. Yeah but I appreciate that

37:48

but I'm still and then hold on you

37:53

have a million different companies hold on let me

37:55

talk here you start with Comedy

37:58

Central then you do to one

38:00

of the most powerful shows on HBO with all

38:02

the most powerful ABC with X-Series in between okay

38:05

I missed that one okay you missed politically incorrect

38:07

on ABC I fucked up on that one no

38:09

come on the same show you was on a

38:11

different network and then you go to HBO not

38:13

only is it one of the most powerful shows

38:16

on HBO and one of the most longest running

38:18

shows on HBO okay you have some of the

38:20

most powerful people world

38:23

leaders media actors actresses all

38:25

the shit which spins off into

38:28

books you

38:31

did a documentary the

38:34

religious documentary and and then

38:36

you also use that vehicle to promote your

38:39

stand-up and you go around don't say you

38:41

didn't build an empire it's an empire what

38:43

do you think my OJ t-shirt no you're

38:45

changing the subject I didn't even fucking notice

38:47

that isn't that hysterical I ain't saying I've

38:50

had this for 30 years I figured this would

38:52

be the last time I could wear it in

38:55

honor of OJ's I love it I didn't even

38:57

realize what it was they just called it out

38:59

I know I was built an empire though they

39:01

didn't have an empire okay so I guess I

39:03

what I mean is a financial empire where you

39:06

have all these like your company just grew and

39:08

grew and grew you know you're

39:10

in the billion discussion like

39:12

many billions and I read

39:15

about your deals where the I'm reading about in

39:17

the financial page of the New York Times that's

39:19

not me that's not it and that's

39:22

why I'm happy where I am but you

39:25

have a real empire like that I'm

39:27

always curious like how people or like

39:29

Elon Musk he's got the the

39:32

neuro link thing where people are walking

39:34

walk in their paralyzed or whatever that

39:36

is and then the markets and spaces

39:39

and the car company like how do

39:41

you manage a day with

39:43

so many fucking irons in the fire

39:45

that's what I'm asking like you have

39:47

to like you must have to like

39:50

increasingly delegate more because you can't

39:52

personally be like in the minutiae

39:54

of all these different companies and

39:56

things you have going the slapping

39:58

in the fight and

40:00

the kicking and the, oh my

40:02

gosh, the madhouse. I

40:05

mean, how many people work for you? How

40:08

many employees do you have? Not as many

40:10

as you would think. We probably have around

40:12

650 employees. Okay, well I don't. Well there's

40:14

like fucking 40 people standing on

40:16

your lawn out there right now when I just came

40:19

in. Those are just the homeless. I let them graze

40:21

here. So

40:24

two years ago I

40:26

started taking my health seriously

40:31

and it just gave me another, you

40:34

know, I have. Yeah, when did

40:36

you have something? Not, you know, I had

40:38

50. That's what I had. I was 50

40:40

fucking years old. And that's

40:42

not an age where you should be, I mean, I'm 68. I

40:45

know, but once you get 50, everything

40:47

starts to change. It's just, it's different.

40:50

I think it doesn't, if you, well,

40:52

I mean, of course everything is slowly

40:54

evolving in the wrong direction, but you

40:57

could basically do whatever

40:59

you used to do, maybe

41:01

somewhat diminished, but can you still, you

41:04

know, play basketball? Yes. Can

41:07

you still run? Yes, I wouldn't do

41:09

a marathon. Can you still make

41:13

sexy time with the misses? You

41:15

know, these are all the things you did when you

41:18

were younger. At 50, certainly

41:20

you should be able to do all

41:22

of them. Yeah. Pretty much as well as

41:24

you could. I couldn't do anything as well as

41:26

I could do when I was in my 30s

41:28

and 40s, but when I turned 50, you

41:31

know, everything started to change. And I

41:33

was talking to all these doctors who

41:36

couldn't cure anything. They couldn't fix any of my problems,

41:38

you know. Well, all they wanted to do was put

41:40

me on pills and I was doing these $10,000

41:42

cholesterol shots in the

41:44

stomach. Yeah, we're talking the same. You

41:46

know, I'm always on this page with Western medicine.

41:49

I'm always on this page with the other

41:51

people who are doing all this other bullshit,

41:54

you know. I'm glad they exist, but they

41:56

get a lot wrong. They're arrogant about thinking

41:58

they have all the answers and the

42:00

two don't match and I'm always on

42:02

this. So tell me yours, so you

42:04

had just 50, so

42:07

you were just like felt shitty? Yeah, and

42:09

I just kept feeling shittier and shittier and shittier. How

42:11

much were you drinking? How much were you drinking? I

42:14

was never really a big drinker. You know.

42:16

I was. When I drank, I would drink, but I

42:18

didn't drink often. I drank

42:20

often. I mean, not every

42:22

night, but like when I was in my 30s

42:25

and 40s, I would

42:27

go out a lot and like to

42:29

multiple stops. I always

42:31

say if I write a memoir, it's gonna be

42:33

called Who is in My Body? Because I would

42:36

never do that now. I couldn't and it

42:38

was like, you know, you'd go to dinner and

42:41

have two drinks and then go to a bar

42:43

and have new and then another after club. And

42:46

by the end of the day, you had eight drinks. We

42:49

did that twice a week. That's 16. I

42:52

used to have a shot before the show every night.

42:54

That's another five, you know. So you're up to like

42:56

20, 25 drinks a week. Now

42:59

to an alcoholic, that's a day. But

43:01

it's still, that's a lot of, it's true.

43:04

That's asking your liver to process a lot of shit.

43:07

I didn't drink like that. I wasn't a

43:09

random drink. I wasn't a regular drinker. Well,

43:11

you missed a good shot. Yeah. Because

43:14

I'm not gonna say it wasn't fine. When I did it, I

43:16

did it. But I didn't do it

43:18

all the time. But you

43:20

know, when I turned 50, I

43:23

was on medicine, all these meds from the doctor.

43:25

Anyway, I met this guy, Gary Brekka. Remember Casey

43:28

Kasem? Of course. His daughter and I

43:30

have been good friends for a long time. And she introduced

43:32

me to this guy, Gary Brekka, and said, this guy will

43:34

change your life. And I always looked at Carrie as like

43:36

a little bit of a hippie, you know what I mean?

43:39

She was what I used to

43:41

consider a hippie. And my whole thing is, if

43:47

what went on through COVID didn't

43:49

wake you up, that

43:51

the modern medicine is

43:53

full of shit. I don't know what to

43:55

tell you. Good luck to you. And I

43:58

hope everything works out for you. We're

44:00

we're woke me up. We're

44:02

there on that one brother Woke

44:04

me up. And that's the thing

44:06

don't get mad too mad at

44:08

people who you don't agree with

44:10

on even major political things because

44:13

ten minutes later you might find out That

44:16

they're totally simpatico and I even the other

44:18

thing right and you think how can this

44:20

person who's so reasonable about this Be

44:23

so wrong about the other thing. It's a

44:25

blind alley to go down They just don't

44:28

see it the way you do and they

44:30

never will and it's okay. Yeah, it's okay.

44:32

It's okay to let it go Listen, we're

44:34

very aligned when it comes to that. I

44:36

don't I literally don't judge anybody by their

44:39

political views and but The

44:42

medical thing I feel sorry for people I'm

44:44

so into this Gary Breckett thing and

44:47

I'm always talking about it and I'm so that

44:49

people actually think I'm getting paid to do This

44:51

no, I'm not I'm actually what I do is

44:53

I go out and talk about it. I pay

44:55

I actually fucking pay Gary he doesn't pay me

44:58

and I talk about it

45:00

because I know that there's other people out there like

45:02

me that are going through this shit and When

45:05

you think about the guys that are you with Gary Brecka

45:07

right now, you know the most

45:11

You know big celebrities powerful businessmen people

45:13

who can afford health care and

45:16

they're not they're going with Gary Brecken doing what he's

45:18

doing He's a human biologist and the

45:20

guy completely changed my life. He told me give me 12

45:22

weeks I'll get you off

45:24

all these pills. So basically what he does he takes

45:26

your blood Takes your blood

45:29

does a DNA test on you and he can

45:31

come back and tell you Everything that's wrong with

45:33

you and he'll tell you what was wrong

45:35

with your parents too. And that's where he blew me

45:37

away Oh, I know what was wrong with my

45:39

parents Be true. No, I mean

45:41

that it's it's always great to find a

45:43

medical guru it's somebody who you can really

45:45

trust and proves to you prove that he

45:47

can That he's

45:50

just looking at I mean I meant a good

45:52

friend of me He's a good friend of mine, but

45:54

my holistic doctor for 20 years ago. I think we

45:57

first got together Where I was

45:59

in a patient Like, you know,

46:01

just reorient your thinking. And

46:05

then you see, oh no, you know, Western

46:07

medicine does have its place for sure. I

46:10

mean, I'm very grateful to Western medicine and

46:12

lots of stuff, but mostly what they're good

46:14

at is saving you at the

46:17

very last minute. If

46:19

you're really fucked, they

46:21

can Superman like catch you as you

46:24

fall out the window before you hit

46:26

the pavement. And that's great. But I

46:28

want something more, you know, organic and

46:30

like long term and let's stop it from

46:32

happening in the first place. And they're not

46:34

good at that. And

46:37

they they misdiagnose a lot. And

46:40

I just don't they divide the

46:42

body into like lots of different

46:44

specialties, when again, the whole, you

46:47

know, it's in the word holistic medicine is

46:49

everything in the body works together. So

46:52

you can't really separate them. There's just

46:54

a whole different philosophy, germ

46:57

theory versus terrain theory, you know,

46:59

stuff like this that is, I

47:02

think, what that kind of

47:04

alternative medicine is preaching makes

47:06

more sense to me. And they

47:08

can, I think they can prove it better. But

47:10

I'm glad that Western medicine exists to balance it.

47:13

I mean, also, some of their stuff is bullshit.

47:15

I mean, but this guy you're talking about, sounds like

47:18

the kind of guy, oh, I want to know this

47:20

guy. And you're

47:22

right. Yeah,

47:24

absolutely. Well, it sounds like

47:26

you're good. That's why when we started having this conversation,

47:28

you said, well, I think it's a lot of the

47:30

same. Well, you've been doing holistic for a long time.

47:33

I wasn't I was I was a this is the

47:35

guy that I was. I'm building

47:37

a business, right? I'm young. And

47:41

every time I felt like I was about to get

47:43

sick and I'm about to go out on the road

47:45

for seven days, I go see my doctor. I'm like,

47:47

I can't get sick. Right. No

47:49

problem. Take these. Fucking

47:51

I never got sick. What were you taking? Oh, fuck

47:54

no. I don't know. Oh, come on shots and

47:56

all this other shit. Oh, come on. You must know.

47:59

No idea. I was at a

48:01

B12. There are shots, B12 shots,

48:03

steroids. For what? I don't know.

48:05

Why would that? I didn't want to get

48:07

sick. So this guy would make sure that I didn't get

48:09

sick. Oh, that's worse than my drinking. Then I got 50.

48:13

You were doing holistic already. You already ended all this stuff. I

48:15

thought that was... No, around that time. I

48:17

would have laughed at you. That you were doing holistic.

48:20

It's ridiculous. I didn't believe in it. There

48:22

were a lot of people out there like me that didn't believe

48:24

in it. They believe in modern medicine. Since I

48:27

met Gary Brackett... I believe in modern medicine. Yeah,

48:30

not for your fucking general health though. No, no, no,

48:32

exactly. For my general health, I don't ever want to

48:34

talk to a doctor. If I break my arm, I

48:36

want to see a doctor. That's it. If

48:39

I need surgery on something, like you said, you're

48:41

about to die. You got something seriously wrong with

48:43

you. You need some type of surgery. I'll go

48:45

see a doctor. There's some things that,

48:48

now that I've been into this for

48:50

a couple of decades, I

48:52

forget are not common

48:54

knowledge. That antibiotics have a

48:56

bad side. Things

48:58

like that which I'm like... I was doing

49:01

antibiotics though. Of course. And again, this is,

49:04

if anyone wants to make a political

49:06

thing out of this, it's silly. It's

49:08

just the scientific fact. Antibiotics, am

49:11

I glad they exist? Of course, because

49:14

when you need them, they're a lifesaver. And

49:17

people used to die of a splinter. But

49:20

I'd like to avoid them always

49:22

because they have a very deleterious

49:24

side effect. They kill the good

49:26

bacteria also. Fungus

49:28

proliferates. I could go on. I don't want

49:30

to bore the people with the fungus again.

49:33

Don't ever get me unfungus because I

49:35

will just keep talking and talking. I'm

49:37

a hawk on fungus. Yeah. I'm

49:40

like Barry Goldwater on

49:42

fungus. Like extremism,

49:46

fighting fungus is no vice.

49:49

And moderation is no virtue. But

49:53

that's another thing. Western medicine, like

49:55

only now kind of catching up to

49:57

fungus. Whereas,

50:00

I think

50:02

holistic medicine has been on that page

50:04

for a long time. It's not always

50:06

bacteria. Western medicine thinks

50:08

everything is germs. And

50:11

it's not. Some of it

50:13

is. But it's the theory that

50:15

it's where the germs are able to

50:18

proliferate. If your

50:20

body is not healthy, it's a

50:22

swamp. And the

50:24

mosquitoes can proliferate. But

50:27

if your body is more holistically healthy, you

50:30

can come into contact with germs, but you'll

50:32

be okay. I met Gary Brekker two years

50:34

ago. Not a

50:36

sniffle. Not a cough. Not a fucking... I

50:39

haven't been sick in two years. How old is this guy? Gary's

50:41

going to be 57, 58. Oh.

50:44

A young man. Yeah.

50:46

Yeah. Yeah. The

50:49

guy's brilliant. Guy

50:51

completely changed my life. And when you

50:53

talk about how do you deal with

50:56

all the irons and the fire every day, because I

50:58

feel... So I always tell Gary... Well, how

51:00

many hours do you work a day? I

51:02

get into the office every day at like

51:04

9.30 in the morning. I work out and do my shit.

51:06

And I don't leave till 8.30 every night. But

51:11

you're probably enjoying it in the day. I love every minute

51:13

of it. Right. I love every minute of it.

51:15

I love every minute. You have to pry yourself to go home.

51:18

I love it. Right. I

51:21

love what I do. Okay. You go

51:23

home at what time? You drive yourself? Yeah.

51:25

Yeah. I like driving too. I

51:27

like driving myself. Yeah. I'll drive

51:30

to work. I usually don't drive home. How long a commute do

51:32

you have? 20 minutes. 20 minutes. Okay.

51:35

And it's not like this. I mean... So

51:37

this is Vegas. I was on your fucking street over here. Yeah.

51:40

And the GPS and the car said one minute for like fucking

51:42

20 minutes. And then finally your crew had

51:44

to go out and shut down traffic on one side so

51:46

we could whip down the street. It was

51:48

crazy, man. Ah, they did? I'm going

51:51

to give them a 10-cent raise. That's awesome. Their

51:53

crew pulled a gang. That's fucking badass. We'd

51:56

just be sitting down right now if they didn't do that.

51:58

Well, I'm reading them gangster moves. Employee

52:00

of the month they killed it Wow.

52:02

We just be starting this podcast right

52:04

now. They didn't Wow. Well, yeah traffic

52:07

I tell a bro. That's it. But

52:09

okay, so then you work all day

52:12

Make your deals this one this one your

52:15

schedule must be just like

52:18

very tight Yep. Yes

52:20

one reason I'm very appreciative you came here. I

52:22

know you I know you're very busy enough

52:25

to do it. I really appreciate You're not it's

52:27

an honor sit down. I'm sure the shit. Thank

52:29

I love it. Really appreciate it But

52:32

okay, so then you you go.

52:34

What do you do when you go home? Your

52:37

wife is waiting with a martini. Yeah, no

52:39

No, um, so right now my

52:42

wife and my daughter my daughter is in high school.

52:44

How is your daughter? She is 17 Okay,

52:47

shall we 18 a summer? Do you have? Woke

52:50

issues with every parent. I know

52:52

when they have a kid like that age They're

52:55

always Bitching to me like

52:57

the confessor of this about how

53:00

their woke kids are driving them up the

53:02

wall with their incredible woke shit So

53:05

you so you raised your kids? Old-school.

53:08

Yes a hundred percent. My kids are

53:11

the whole family is aligned on Common

53:14

sense. We all have lots

53:16

of common sense. My Thanksgiving. There's no Political

53:19

zero there's none of that shit in

53:21

my in my life or whatever about

53:23

the extended family. There must be some

53:26

Asshole uncle who's either too right-wing or

53:29

too left or nobody there's no cousin

53:31

who know lesbian with purple hair And

53:33

family and none of that was on

53:35

thanks. No, that's it. My cousin like

53:38

one My

53:43

cousins is on the liberal side

53:46

Um, you know, but listen, I'm

53:48

one of these believers and I'm no

53:50

I'm on the liberal side You

53:53

are but you're not you're you're you're you're

53:55

more of an you're an old-school Democrat is

53:57

what you are. Exactly Yeah, it's the liberal

53:59

side Yeah, not today's

54:02

definition. Well, I mean, again, I would... You're

54:04

more of a libertarian. I've

54:07

always been partly that. You

54:09

know, in my new book, what

54:13

this comedian said will shock you, which just comes out May

54:15

21st. I think you can pre-order it

54:17

now. What's your old book?

54:19

Ari told me I gotta get your old book. No,

54:22

get the new book. The new book? Fuck

54:24

the old book. There's no old books. Just

54:26

this one fucking book in the world. Ari's

54:28

telling me your old book is incredible. Um,

54:30

this is incredible or whatever the fuck that

54:33

is. Anyway, there's a

54:35

thing here. I never did it on

54:37

the show. I just put it in

54:39

the book about Damar Hamlin. You

54:42

remember that story? No. Damar Hamlin,

54:45

it was a big story. I think you probably

54:47

should not remember the name. He was the Buffalo

54:50

football player. Oh, of course. Okay,

54:52

so, you know, as you remember, it

54:55

was the most important game of the regular season.

54:57

It's the last game of the year. And it

54:59

was the Bills and the Bengals who were both

55:02

playoff bound. They had to play this

55:04

game, right? And

55:06

like on the first play, it's a

55:08

kickoff, Damar Hamlin goes to the ground. It was

55:10

crazy. It was crazy. We were watching

55:12

the game. Right. And, you

55:16

know, it was obviously not a

55:18

normal injury. So

55:20

everyone was freaked out. The ambulance comes.

55:23

They take him away. And the

55:25

first like 15 minutes, they were of

55:27

the opinion, the broadcasters, that, well,

55:30

you know, we'll do this and then we'll play

55:32

the game. Like no one was

55:34

saying immediately, well, we can't play this game.

55:38

And then like the players, we see them on

55:40

the sideline. Some of them were upset and crying.

55:42

And then they go to the locker room to

55:44

get their head together. And by

55:46

the time night had fallen on

55:48

this event, it was just

55:50

the one true opinion that

55:53

this game could not have been played because

55:56

that's the way America reacts to things.

55:59

Now, I'm... opinion that they should have played

56:01

the game because I don't think it would

56:03

have hurt the person they cared

56:05

about and we cared about. And

56:07

by the way, he's fine, which is the good part

56:09

of the story. But why cancel

56:11

the game? All those fans who

56:14

live for that game all year long and

56:16

the people who did whatever they could to

56:18

get out to the stadium and just leave

56:20

with the ticket stub, and

56:23

they kept saying, this is such

56:25

bad logic. The

56:27

important thing is DeMaur. Absolutely, of course

56:29

it is. Of course it is. How

56:32

does that affect playing the game? He's

56:34

in the hospital. Unless the doctors

56:36

are watching the game out of a corner of

56:39

their eye while they're operating on them, I don't

56:41

think it's going to affect anything. And

56:43

yet, you know, this became skip

56:45

playlist, like suggested, maybe we should

56:47

have played the game and they wanted to cancel them.

56:51

For just entertaining an idea that like 24

56:53

hours earlier was what everybody thought was going

56:55

to happen. And then we

56:57

all just like fucking sheep got behind this

56:59

idea that somehow it would like, I don't

57:01

know, be disrespectful to the guy in the

57:04

hospital. By the way, he got it because

57:06

when he woke up, you know what the first thing

57:09

he said was? Did we win?

57:11

Yes. Did we win? Yeah,

57:15

no, it makes sense. No, because you

57:17

live in baby land DeMaur, so nobody

57:20

played the game. I think what happens

57:22

to though is a lot of the

57:24

players, and I see this in fighting

57:26

a lot too, a lot of the players,

57:29

when you see something like that happen

57:31

to somebody that you're close to and whether

57:34

you're one of his teammates or you're on the

57:36

opposing team, it's sort of a dope slap of

57:38

reality of what's possible. Cause when you go out

57:40

and play a game that you've played since you

57:42

were a kid your whole life, maybe

57:44

a, maybe a toy or ACL or you had broke

57:46

a finger or something like that. When you see a

57:48

guy that you think might be dead, holy

57:52

shit, that it gets in

57:54

the player's heads. I've seen it happen

57:56

to fighters when there's football, they're in

57:58

their locker rooms. The guy gets

58:00

viciously knocked out and you're next.

58:03

You're walking out the tunnel next to go

58:05

back out there. Football prides itself on

58:08

being the tough guy sport. No, I agree.

58:10

This is the one we play rain

58:12

or shine, rain or shine. No rain, no

58:14

sleep, I agree. I

58:16

mean, I remember as a kid and they'd be playing in the mud

58:19

and I thought this is the greatest thing in the world.

58:21

Watch them slide 20 yards in the mud. And

58:23

it's just, you know, smash mouth football. It's

58:26

not for the faint of heart. And that's

58:28

what we do. We wear football.

58:30

So I just thought, you

58:32

know, and also, come on, there's no crying

58:34

in football. I agree. I don't disagree

58:37

with you. Listen, the last

58:39

thing that I wanna see is

58:42

any more of the pussification of

58:45

this country and the people in it. It's

58:48

definitely sickening to see some of this

58:50

stuff. It's the hypocrisy also of if

58:54

they really cared that much about

58:57

the safety of the players, they wouldn't

58:59

have canceled the game. They canceled the

59:01

sport because it is

59:03

a, and they shouldn't because again, this is

59:05

where I'm a libertarian. First

59:08

of all, watch a football game.

59:10

The players are really enjoying themselves.

59:13

They are loving it. They are

59:15

making a deal and it's a deal. Every

59:17

adult should be free to make. I made

59:19

it with drugs and liquor and lots of

59:22

other stuff. I'm gonna trade something in the

59:24

future for having the time of my life

59:26

now. That is up to you to make

59:28

that decision. That should be nobody else's decision

59:30

and you see them hopping around and high-fiving.

59:34

I mean, they're living their best life. You're

59:37

absolutely right. I don't disagree with you

59:39

one bit. What we really cared about

59:41

and some people do in this country, ultimate

59:45

safetyism. If everything has to

59:47

be like keeping us the most safe, cancel the

59:49

sport because you are gonna have, I mean, I

59:51

hope tomorrow plays another 15 years and

59:54

has a great career, but he's much more

59:56

likely to have what many

59:58

of the players have, which is... CTE from

1:00:01

getting hit in the head too much Which

1:00:03

has fucked up a lot of guys later

1:00:05

in life. Yep. I mean committing

1:00:07

suicide just like my

1:00:09

brain just Everything is foggy.

1:00:12

It's just never gonna be right and

1:00:15

Can drive you crazy? I don't disagree with you.

1:00:17

Yeah, and I was on that side shouldn't

1:00:19

because you could that's a deal you make

1:00:21

I Used

1:00:23

to box spar all that stuff I loved every minute

1:00:25

of it when I was young and did it and

1:00:27

and like you said There's

1:00:29

there's dangers to doing it. I wouldn't

1:00:32

take back one punch I loved it

1:00:34

when I did it when I was young and it got

1:00:36

me to where I am here today And right you're absolutely

1:00:38

right. I couldn't do more. Yeah, absolutely

1:00:40

right look you can't you can never You

1:00:44

want to of course be able to talk

1:00:46

now you now to younger you mm-hmm,

1:00:48

you know, wouldn't it be great if?

1:00:52

54 year old Dana was around to talk to that nudnik

1:00:56

20 year old who God knows what you're thinking

1:00:58

and do I would have done it all the same

1:01:01

I would not I wouldn't I

1:01:03

wouldn't change one thing. Well, I would change

1:01:05

everything Really?

1:01:07

Come on, man You

1:01:09

wouldn't you had it all together at 20. There's no

1:01:12

way If you

1:01:14

change everything, maybe you're not sitting in

1:01:16

the chair right now having this conversation.

1:01:18

Well, that's that's a good philosophical point

1:01:20

That's it. That's the butterfly effect idea

1:01:22

you I see what you're saying Yeah,

1:01:24

I I have this this lives like

1:01:27

I didn't have great parents growing up, right? right,

1:01:29

and there's two different ways to look at life,

1:01:32

so You'll

1:01:34

hear these people that want to cry about their upbringing or

1:01:36

whatever. I didn't have any role models or whatever Yeah,

1:01:39

you did. I had incredible

1:01:41

role models My people

1:01:43

around me showed me everything that I didn't

1:01:45

want to be and I saw the things

1:01:47

that I did want to be We all

1:01:49

grow up with role models. It's just how

1:01:51

do you choose to see God's? I

1:01:54

was deprived of shitty parents and that's why

1:01:56

I don't have an empire. That's right. You

1:01:58

have 600 people working working for

1:02:00

you and I got the bums on the lawn

1:02:02

out there. You did just fine. If

1:02:06

you were to say that you would change anything

1:02:08

when you were younger, maybe we did some dumb

1:02:11

shit that I don't remember. I

1:02:13

wouldn't pick different parents. I wouldn't pick a different

1:02:15

upbringing. I wouldn't pick different aunts and uncles that

1:02:18

I had. Everybody that I

1:02:20

grew up with and around taught me something. But

1:02:22

I just feel like I could have just done

1:02:24

so many better

1:02:26

choices, so many stops along the

1:02:32

way. If I

1:02:34

could only go back and extirpate

1:02:36

from my mind so many bad thoughts

1:02:38

I had about how things worked and

1:02:40

who I was, I feel

1:02:44

I could have the same good life without

1:02:46

so much pain that I caused

1:02:48

myself. I think, give

1:02:50

me an example, I was

1:02:53

putting away some pictures recently and there was one

1:02:55

that was some publicity photo taken early in my

1:02:57

career. It was 28 and I'm looking at this

1:03:00

picture and I'm like, this guy is really

1:03:02

bad looking. I realized when

1:03:05

I was that age and I struck

1:03:07

out with a girl, I always think, God

1:03:10

damn it, I'm not good looking enough. Because

1:03:13

otherwise, she loved me. I have this awesome

1:03:16

personality. I realized looking back,

1:03:19

it's the exact opposite. I was plenty

1:03:21

good looking enough. What's my

1:03:23

personality that was the problem?

1:03:29

Like things like that, if I could just have

1:03:31

the mind I have now, it would just be

1:03:34

great. What would you do different? When

1:03:36

you talk about girls, you're

1:03:38

not married, you don't have kids, and

1:03:40

that's obviously a choice. I made a choice

1:03:42

to not get married and not have

1:03:44

children. Listen,

1:03:47

I got a buddy who's just like you in so

1:03:49

many different ways. Seriously, in so

1:03:51

many different ways he's like you. What

1:03:53

I find weird about my friend is he's a

1:03:55

good looking dude, was a

1:03:57

great athlete his whole life, but it's almost like he's

1:03:59

still... Searching for himself in a

1:04:01

weird way. He know, you know, he never

1:04:03

wanted to get married He did have a

1:04:06

kid, you know, he got some girl pregnant

1:04:09

um, and It's almost

1:04:11

like this this guy who I look at and

1:04:13

say fuck this guy's got everything and but he's

1:04:15

always still sort of looking He did that ayahuasca

1:04:17

bullshit and you know He

1:04:22

did that ayahuasca thing I came back and was a

1:04:24

total pussy when he came back from doing that I

1:04:26

wanted to start talking to me about his feelings and

1:04:28

shit and like I was like, dude, where are you?

1:04:30

Well, I'm looking for my old my old friend. Where'd

1:04:33

he go? I'm

1:04:38

sympathetic to what you're saying. I although

1:04:40

there are a few things here. I

1:04:42

have to say ayahuasca I

1:04:46

don't I'm not gonna do it, but

1:04:48

I don't think I'm better because I'm not gonna do it. I

1:04:50

think I'm worse I think if I

1:04:53

wasn't such a baby right now or maybe if I

1:04:55

was a little younger or I really

1:04:57

wanted to look under the hood Or I

1:04:59

thought it would change things or maybe I'm afraid

1:05:01

it will change things and I'm pretty happy with

1:05:03

how things are going 100% I

1:05:05

would I would do ayahuasca

1:05:07

and when people do it, I think look I've

1:05:10

been a drug advocate my whole life I can't

1:05:12

be a hypocrite and say oh, I don't think

1:05:14

it's a good thing to explore your mind You

1:05:17

know the group the doors? You

1:05:19

know what I've you know where that comes from that name

1:05:21

the doors comes from all this

1:05:23

Huxley All this Huxley's book called

1:05:25

the doors of perception and

1:05:28

the doors of perception are opened Was

1:05:31

the books theme with drugs? You

1:05:33

know, you can find places in your

1:05:35

mind that you never would without drugs.

1:05:37

So it's a treat. It's a mind

1:05:39

treat And why did

1:05:41

you get why did you not want to get married and not have kids?

1:05:44

Well, um Yeah That's

1:05:49

a kettle of worms You

1:05:51

know, I think it was in me the

1:05:53

kids thing was in me from from my

1:05:55

own childhood I didn't like kids as a

1:05:57

kid and it never changed Like,

1:06:01

I was always into adult things. Not

1:06:04

that I'm the biggest intellectual in the world, but

1:06:06

adult stuff just seemed more fun. And

1:06:08

I wasn't wrong. It is. Now,

1:06:11

of course, when I was 10 and playing in dirt

1:06:13

or whatever, I'm sure I thought that was great. But,

1:06:16

I mean, it wasn't, I wasn't very old. I

1:06:19

mean, certainly 9 or 10. By

1:06:21

that time, I was like thinking, oh, you

1:06:23

know, James Bond and Johnny Carson are

1:06:26

a lot cooler than Dirk

1:06:28

over here. You know,

1:06:30

Gary. You know, so

1:06:33

I was always like into the adult stuff.

1:06:35

And then like, it just

1:06:38

seemed like, you

1:06:40

know, Woody Allen said marriage is the death of

1:06:42

hope. I mean, that's a little harsh.

1:06:46

And it's certainly not applicable to everybody.

1:06:48

I know lots of people who are

1:06:51

very happy that they're married and would not be

1:06:53

happy if they weren't. If they

1:06:55

lost their spouse, they'd be lost. I'm just that

1:06:57

other type, you know, that doesn't mean I can't

1:06:59

connect. I love to connect. I

1:07:01

have another buddy who's super intelligent. He's a really, really

1:07:04

smart guy. And you know,

1:07:06

one of those guys who's sort of older

1:07:08

than he, you know, older than

1:07:10

he really is. He's older than his years. Exactly.

1:07:14

And wants nothing to do

1:07:16

with kids. So I'm always fascinated

1:07:18

by that. What makes a guy? Well,

1:07:21

it takes all types. I mean, I know guys

1:07:23

who were players when I knew

1:07:25

them and they were bachelors and it didn't

1:07:27

stop after they got married. They

1:07:29

just wanted kids. And

1:07:32

even though they were like really kind of terrible

1:07:34

to their wives and the fact that they were

1:07:36

always cheating and stuff, they were

1:07:38

great dads. That's

1:07:40

a type. I know that type of guy. There's

1:07:43

a lot of guys like that, certainly

1:07:45

out here, maybe they're more, but like,

1:07:47

they're players, they're scalo eggs, but they

1:07:49

do take dad seriously. And the wife

1:07:51

kind of knows maybe, but he's

1:07:53

such a good dad. You know, it makes up

1:07:56

for a lot of sins. He's such a good

1:07:58

dad. It's funny because I don't know. I

1:08:00

would think when I was younger, I never really thought about

1:08:02

kids, you know, but I

1:08:04

didn't realize I

1:08:09

never realized that I didn't have good parents

1:08:12

until I had kids. I was

1:08:14

like fucking wait a minute This is

1:08:16

how you're supposed to feel about your kids. This is how you're

1:08:18

supposed to you know, it really hit me

1:08:21

When I when I had my kids and I think

1:08:24

that Really

1:08:26

made my relationship even worse with my

1:08:28

parents I don't know if you have a

1:08:30

very loving and like, you

1:08:32

know a fusive

1:08:35

sort of demonstrative of your

1:08:37

love Kind of family

1:08:39

thing going on which which is interesting

1:08:42

because that strikes me usually as more

1:08:44

ethnic and you were I mean Your

1:08:46

name is white You're

1:08:48

white But

1:08:52

would you say that you almost have

1:08:54

like an ethnic type family? Yeah, I

1:08:56

mean my wife's Italian So, you know,

1:08:58

there you go. Yeah So,

1:09:01

yeah, the Italians the Jews Mexicans,

1:09:04

you know Yeah,

1:09:07

very very tight family unit and

1:09:09

they also demonstrated right, you know,

1:09:11

sometimes by yelling and being

1:09:14

just passionate And but but it's like it's

1:09:16

at least it's out there Yeah, it's my

1:09:18

wife doesn't care about any of this shit.

1:09:20

None of this shit all she cares about

1:09:22

her kids in her family She's always with

1:09:24

her kids or with her mother or her

1:09:26

sisters and you know, that's that's all she

1:09:28

literally cares about Well,

1:09:31

whatever, you know Woody Allen

1:09:33

made that will be I thought it was

1:09:35

one of his best later movies with Larry

1:09:37

David playing the Woody Allen part Called whatever

1:09:39

works the gibbousie that now No,

1:09:42

you ever saw whatever works. I've never saw the

1:09:44

Larry David show. I've never seen her be right

1:09:46

this I'm not a big TV guy. I'm not

1:09:48

shitting you. I watched like your show and A

1:09:52

handful of other shows and I'm not a real big

1:09:54

TV guy What I like

1:09:56

about your show is that you

1:09:58

and I do think a lot of like on

1:10:01

a lot of ways. We're obviously

1:10:03

far apart in the Trump thing,

1:10:05

but whatever's

1:10:07

going on, I get downloaded

1:10:10

on what's going on politically

1:10:12

and in the world, new rules,

1:10:14

you know, all that shit. I can get

1:10:16

it all in one place. And

1:10:20

it's not by, I get the news from you, basically.

1:10:23

It's not biased in my opinion, because

1:10:25

you have all these different people online.

1:10:27

You're not afraid to have real hardcore

1:10:29

conservatives on and everybody. And I like

1:10:31

to hear, I don't want to hear

1:10:33

CNN's fucking version or Fox's version. I

1:10:35

want to hear different opinions

1:10:37

from different people and, and, and

1:10:40

I'll make the decision myself on what I think. And

1:10:42

you know, it's interesting about the media, what you just

1:10:44

said, you said, I don't want

1:10:46

to hear Fox's opinion or CNN's opinion.

1:10:49

People, I've heard people say that a lot

1:10:51

lately. They used to say, I don't

1:10:54

want to hear Fox's opinion or

1:10:56

MSNBC's opinion. Now CNN

1:10:59

is seen by a lot of people,

1:11:01

certainly on the right anyway, as the

1:11:03

same as MSNBC, like just

1:11:05

another liberal outlet

1:11:08

when they used to be the middle

1:11:11

of the road. And I think I know they're trying

1:11:13

to get back to that. And I think they're really

1:11:15

making some good, good progress

1:11:18

in that area. I'm on CNN

1:11:20

now, on Saturday night, they rerun

1:11:22

my show with all the fucks

1:11:24

in it. No shit. Exactly what

1:11:26

I said. I said, you're

1:11:28

going to run real time

1:11:31

with my fucking potty mouth. And

1:11:34

you know what? Nobody gives

1:11:36

a shit. Like America,

1:11:38

you always have to keep checking. Like

1:11:40

where is America? I mean, even

1:11:42

when I started in television, you

1:11:45

couldn't say shit. I mean,

1:11:47

the word shit. It's so true. Now

1:11:49

on Comedy Central Roast, that's basic cable.

1:11:52

That's anybody can have that in any

1:11:54

home. It's everything but cunt. And

1:11:57

I'm complaining about that. That's my

1:11:59

word. I actually never use I've never

1:12:01

used that word if I read that word

1:12:03

in places it doesn't belong I say things

1:12:06

like what the country is talking about The

1:12:10

cunt would do that I am looked

1:12:12

at as one of those guys It's

1:12:14

that you know has the the horrible

1:12:16

mouth. I don't use that one that one's

1:12:18

that one's next level for me, too Fuck

1:12:21

is probably my favorite favorite word in

1:12:24

English language, I love for a big tough

1:12:26

successful guy. You don't have to say anything

1:12:29

You know you don't have to that's the thing you don't have

1:12:32

to pick up the sword Because

1:12:34

it comes pre-advertised so you don't have to

1:12:36

say fuck or raise your voice or you

1:12:39

know I'm sure you're

1:12:41

a great boss. I'm sure your staff Well,

1:12:44

I'm not sure of anything. I just mentioned but I Great

1:12:48

relationship with my staff love my stuff me

1:12:50

too. Yep. I mean that's everything

1:12:55

It's everything if you don't have nobody

1:12:57

does anything by themselves You

1:12:59

have to have a great team you have to

1:13:02

treat everybody with respect treat everybody well And you

1:13:04

have to love the people that you work with

1:13:06

every day well again. You don't

1:13:08

have to and you do you do I'm

1:13:11

you know I can't agree that I want

1:13:13

to I can't have Two-faced

1:13:18

Backstabbing cutthroat fucking people

1:13:20

that work for me and not Me

1:13:22

but not doing it to anybody Within

1:13:25

our world well, I feel like that goes

1:13:27

unsaid. Yes. Yes Yeah, I

1:13:29

don't want back but having cut it's

1:13:31

absolutely prevalent and every every

1:13:34

job everywhere in the world Rarely when you're

1:13:36

the boss see we're the boss. They're not

1:13:38

the The backstabbing But

1:13:42

I I I see it inside my

1:13:44

company and when it went it's a cancer

1:13:46

You I cut people out like fucking cancer

1:13:48

if you are a negative Suck

1:13:51

a shit. Okay, you're fucking gone. You're

1:13:53

out of here. I don't deal with

1:13:55

it I have had the great fortune

1:13:57

of having a genius I'm

1:14:02

a few genius

1:14:04

producers actually but

1:14:06

she the one who takes care of

1:14:08

like hiring. Genius

1:14:11

that she just never hires an asshole

1:14:14

and that's a great luxury. And you're

1:14:16

right I mean I'm set it

1:14:18

before it's boring I'll say it again but I'd

1:14:21

rather have a. Writing

1:14:24

room then a jet

1:14:27

or rolls Royce or anything yeah

1:14:30

that's like the greatest luxury

1:14:32

is to have a room full of

1:14:34

people who you can go into and

1:14:36

be funny and say crazy

1:14:38

things and no one's going to drop a dime on

1:14:40

you. We're on the same team and we all want

1:14:42

to get the same place we all want to win.

1:14:45

And with today's younger

1:14:47

generations there snitches

1:14:49

and bitches they're easily

1:14:51

offended and they love to take it

1:14:53

public and. You

1:14:56

gotta go so they don't they

1:14:58

don't last in my place like that you know

1:15:00

what I mean and I have this

1:15:02

this philosophy at work you know you

1:15:04

know the whole the whole Trump thing and

1:15:06

all that stuff. I don't push

1:15:08

any type of agenda in our office

1:15:10

or whatever I don't even say hey guys it's

1:15:13

fucking you know primaries are coming up get out

1:15:15

and vote. And all this shit right now a

1:15:17

little vote if you don't like it. It's

1:15:20

not your play exactly do whatever the fuck you

1:15:22

want to know no place for that in the

1:15:24

workplace I agree to fucking sleep with what you're

1:15:26

right as who you pray to what you smoke

1:15:28

any of that should we vote for who you

1:15:31

whatever I don't care all I care about for

1:15:33

the next eight hours is that you give a

1:15:35

shit about UFC and what we got. Other

1:15:38

than that live your best life do you and

1:15:41

let's have fucking fun doing this and let's do the best. So

1:15:44

you have no idea of the ideological makeup of

1:15:46

the people who work there but I bet you

1:15:49

see the thing is that it probably attracts people

1:15:51

who know who have your similar

1:15:53

politics because they know but

1:15:55

it's great that you wouldn't you

1:15:58

know in any way. Be

1:16:00

biased against someone who didn't have your politics,

1:16:03

right? You know, I just saw this thing

1:16:05

yesterday Where I want

1:16:07

to say it was the CEO of Nike Just

1:16:10

came out and said We're

1:16:12

starting to notice that People

1:16:15

not being in the office is a problem. It's

1:16:18

it's slowing down Creativity

1:16:20

productivity. Are you fucking

1:16:22

shitting me? Really? Yeah,

1:16:26

let me tell you what happens when you don't have people

1:16:28

in the office for two fucking years or

1:16:30

longer I was screaming about this in our meeting

1:16:33

today that I think where is the book that

1:16:35

somebody needs to write? About

1:16:38

the just the cumulative collateral

1:16:40

damage From our reaction

1:16:42

to the pandemic not the pandemic the

1:16:45

reaction to it and the overreaction because

1:16:47

we just found out like the murder

1:16:49

rates Plummeted like

1:16:51

in the last six months It

1:16:54

was all pandemic related. It's not

1:16:56

whether Trump is president or Biden

1:16:58

is president The

1:17:00

murder rates went up car crash

1:17:02

rates went up to say nothing of the

1:17:05

kids who didn't learn anything for two years

1:17:07

And all this stuff the

1:17:09

health issues that arose because

1:17:11

people didn't get test I can go on

1:17:13

and on someone needs to do a real

1:17:16

smart tally of all

1:17:18

the collateral damage From

1:17:20

how we overreacted and see and then

1:17:22

let's add it up Cannot

1:17:25

agree and see if it you know, let's

1:17:27

have some data. Let's let's let's

1:17:29

have this battle on a data level depression

1:17:32

Depression. Yes suicide like 100% so

1:17:34

many things and and kids who are

1:17:37

I mean, how do you assess the

1:17:39

psychological damage of kids? Who are germ?

1:17:41

Paranoids. Yeah from the age of two

1:17:45

People who are laid off people who

1:17:47

lost their businesses that they spent 20

1:17:49

30 40 50 years building

1:17:51

delicious goes on and on and on But

1:17:54

just so I know for sure you believe that I

1:17:56

mean you don't believe that it's a hoax Like me

1:17:58

you believe code was a reason of course. People

1:18:01

died from COVID 100%. Yeah, of course, right. But

1:18:03

people died from the flu too, and people die

1:18:05

from lots of things every day. It was worse

1:18:07

than the flu. I mean, the flu did not

1:18:09

kill quite like that, and it was not the

1:18:11

same thing, and our bodies were less used to

1:18:13

it. But, you know, well,

1:18:16

I don't know. My philosophy was if it's as bad

1:18:18

as they say it is, we're all fucked anyway, all

1:18:20

right? And let me tell you what I'm not gonna

1:18:22

do. I'm not gonna die hiding in

1:18:24

my fucking house. That's for damn sure. But back in

1:18:27

the day when you were getting all that shit pumped

1:18:29

into you. Whatever it was. And

1:18:32

I'd be, you

1:18:34

should call up your doctors and find out what

1:18:36

you were taking. He passed away. Oh. Yeah, he

1:18:39

passed away. That's a bad sign. I guess that's

1:18:41

why. He was an older guy. He was an

1:18:43

old school guy. He was an old school doctor.

1:18:46

And, you know, no,

1:18:48

I, listen to that. I was at a

1:18:50

place, and you know this, everybody knows this as watching

1:18:52

this. When you're young, you fucking,

1:18:55

you never even think about this shit. It

1:18:58

changed so much from 30 to 50. Like

1:19:01

you said, you learn so much more. You could go

1:19:03

back and talk to that idiot. Well,

1:19:07

you know, I just helped, I smoked for

1:19:09

20 years. Don't you think I would

1:19:11

have liked to go back to when I was 20 and go, I

1:19:14

know you think this is making you cool right now.

1:19:17

But it's, you just. Completely

1:19:19

understand that one. Definitely. Definitely.

1:19:21

Why you smoked? No, I never

1:19:23

smoked. I never smoked and I never did drugs. I

1:19:26

drank moderately. When I drank, I would get shit

1:19:29

faced. But when I, you know, I didn't do

1:19:31

it all. Not too late. What's that?

1:19:33

Not too late. I

1:19:35

promise I won't turn into one of

1:19:37

those Iowaska Nancy boys asking about your

1:19:39

feelings, Dana. I don't give a fuck

1:19:41

about your feelings. Good. Perfect.

1:19:43

You and I can hang out a lot. Because I don't

1:19:45

want to ever fucking talk about my feelings with another fucking

1:19:47

dude. But. You

1:19:50

don't mean that. I mean, that's too far. I mean. No,

1:19:52

no, I'm that guy. I'm that guy. It

1:19:55

drives my wife fucking crazy. No,

1:19:57

I don't want to talk about my feelings. And I don't

1:19:59

want to. talk about. But you may not want to

1:20:01

but we talk about a lot of things tonight and

1:20:03

your feelings were injected into all of them I'm sure

1:20:06

as they should be. But as far as what? I

1:20:08

don't know whatever we talked about. I did

1:20:12

a... You were abused as a Catholic boy.

1:20:14

Did I remember that wrong? You

1:20:18

opened up to me. I was doing

1:20:20

an interview with... Oh geez I can't

1:20:23

remember his name right now but he starts diving

1:20:25

into my... he starts doing the whole stuff.

1:20:29

I'm like, I'm going to

1:20:31

end up with my parents.

1:20:34

How did it feel to know

1:20:36

that you never had the love of

1:20:38

your parents? Who said that? Like everybody

1:20:40

else that grew up in a

1:20:43

family hat and all this shit and he's like,

1:20:45

how does that make you feel? Jesus Christ you

1:20:48

sound like my fucking wife. What the

1:20:51

fuck are you talking about? I'm doing an interview with

1:20:53

you about the business and you want to ask me about

1:20:55

my... Because my wife would always say, do you

1:20:58

want to talk about your parents and that?

1:21:00

No I don't fucking talk. I'm good. I'm

1:21:02

in a good place. I'm one of those

1:21:05

fucking old school guys. When

1:21:07

you talk about men's mental health and that

1:21:09

men have to carry this burden and men

1:21:11

have... Yeah that's what we

1:21:13

fucking do. Guess what? Somebody's got to get

1:21:15

up. I have a family. I have children.

1:21:18

I got to get up every day and go to fucking work

1:21:20

and I have to do what I have to do. And no

1:21:24

I don't give a shit about

1:21:26

my feelings. I'm basically on the

1:21:28

same page. Well

1:21:31

just in the sense of first

1:21:34

of all, women always want more

1:21:36

out of you than you could ever give.

1:21:38

I mean I don't say that in a

1:21:40

snarky way. It's just generally the way they

1:21:42

are. They always think there's more to you

1:21:45

that you're not quite giving. And it's like

1:21:47

honey I swear to God. No I agree

1:21:49

you're right. Or at the bottom of the

1:21:51

barrel here. I wish there was more. I

1:21:53

wish I was deeper. But I mean we're

1:21:55

at the basement below that is public parking

1:21:57

and we don't want to go down there.

1:22:00

It's just and and just that's always

1:22:02

gonna be their nature. Mm-hmm. And our

1:22:04

nature is yes I mean that certainly

1:22:07

is changing with the

1:22:09

recent generations who don't even really

1:22:11

many times want to stay there

1:22:13

of one particular gender at all

1:22:15

hundred percent so You

1:22:18

know Pierce Morgan, by the way, I just said Pierce

1:22:20

Morgan. I love fear. I do too.

1:22:22

He's right there. So then You

1:22:25

know, you see these guys these days on fucking

1:22:27

social media Like hey, you

1:22:30

know You

1:22:33

know, you know I'm saying just talking about Day

1:22:35

and this happened and I'm right and shut the

1:22:38

fuck up. Oh, I know get up Oh,

1:22:40

I know fucking work and do what you got to

1:22:43

do and and and be a fucking

1:22:45

man You know your man. I tell you just

1:22:47

be a man this to me though I just

1:22:49

if I could speak like I think we're friends

1:22:51

now Very intimate now and

1:22:53

my feelings are involved but like this

1:22:56

I must say as a bachelor Has

1:22:58

not been I look I'm talking to you like no one's gonna

1:23:00

hear this This has not been

1:23:02

the worst thing it for me because

1:23:05

like there is such a dearth of

1:23:09

Like man who act like man That

1:23:13

you know if you're one of them

1:23:15

who does not in an obnoxious way not in

1:23:17

a toxic way But just

1:23:19

like a man Instead of

1:23:22

this bullshit. Mm-hmm. Or if you're a

1:23:24

guy who doesn't think that the first

1:23:26

date should include anal and choking

1:23:29

You just stand out as like, oh

1:23:32

my god, you know What

1:23:35

that sort of male still exists? Yeah So

1:23:38

like as much as I bemoan

1:23:40

for society Men

1:23:43

young men acting like such assholes. It's

1:23:45

been great for me. Yeah. No, I

1:23:47

get it Yeah, I'm telling you it's

1:23:50

it's it's it's tough It's one of the it's one of the

1:23:52

tough things for me and I and I try it Like I

1:23:54

said, I try not to judge people on things But I

1:23:57

have a really hard time with men who don't act like

1:23:59

fucking men that's, that's a big one for me.

1:24:02

And it's not the, no, I mean, and all

1:24:04

the shit that goes on these days and, and,

1:24:06

and, you know,

1:24:08

look at, look at the stuff that's going on

1:24:10

with women's basketball. Ryan's fucking awesome that, that, that,

1:24:12

that it's taken off and people are into it.

1:24:14

I was one of the, one of the first,

1:24:16

I got season tickets to the ACEs game in

1:24:18

Vegas and stuff like that. But at the end

1:24:20

of the day, women, uh,

1:24:23

you know, women want to

1:24:25

be taken care of. Women want to be

1:24:27

treated a certain way, whether they believe it

1:24:29

or not. Well, a, a

1:24:31

goodly percentage of women who always felt that

1:24:33

way still feel that way is what I,

1:24:35

is how I would put it. I wouldn't

1:24:37

say women in general, because certainly

1:24:39

there are lots of, there's

1:24:42

certainly a percentage, 10% or

1:24:45

so who don't want to be involved with men at

1:24:47

all. That is the

1:24:49

great victory of whatever the woman's movement

1:24:51

or the revolution or liberation or whatever

1:24:53

it was. That was really what it

1:24:55

was. When I was a kid, a

1:24:57

woman literally moved from her father's house

1:25:00

to the husband's house. There was no, like, I

1:25:02

mean, there was like sitcoms. No, that's a good

1:25:04

point. When I was a kid, right? That girl,

1:25:06

like she's on her own in the city, on

1:25:08

her own in the city. Yeah. Wow. This is

1:25:11

where we're so fucking modern, you know, women,

1:25:14

the difference between my mother's day and,

1:25:16

and certainly even after that, I think

1:25:18

to a degree and now is like,

1:25:20

then you had to find a husband.

1:25:23

Now women are like, if

1:25:25

I find somebody who's great

1:25:27

and it makes sense, yeah,

1:25:29

I can do that, but I'm not going

1:25:31

to do it just to do it. 100%. If

1:25:34

I can't find somebody great, I can

1:25:36

be on my own. There's

1:25:39

a woman side the door over

1:25:41

here somewhere. My head of PR who is

1:25:43

the absolute fucking best of the business man.

1:25:45

She's, she's an absolute gangster. She

1:25:47

is a massive asset. No, I'm dead

1:25:49

serious. I know you are. And

1:25:52

I have nothing but respect for her. I,

1:25:54

I, don't make a move without having her

1:25:56

involved in it because she's fucking brilliant. And

1:25:59

you're right. She is one of

1:26:01

them. She's definitely not being taken care of by

1:26:03

anybody. She handles her fucking right takes care of

1:26:05

herself Right, but I would say most women in

1:26:07

general You

1:26:10

know want to feel safe and be taken

1:26:12

care of especially yes If you

1:26:14

end up having a fucking bait that like this whole

1:26:16

shit these days if you have a kid with somebody,

1:26:18

right? If you if you have

1:26:20

a kid with a woman Her

1:26:23

life completely changes your

1:26:25

life really doesn't change that much right right?

1:26:28

Yeah, you fucking yes You

1:26:30

take care of the woman

1:26:32

that had your fucking children, right and you take care

1:26:34

of your children, right? I guess that that's what I

1:26:36

meant to say instead of yeah, you were dead on

1:26:39

with what you said Yeah, that's this is what I

1:26:41

meant if you if you If

1:26:44

a woman has your child or

1:26:46

children, right her life completely

1:26:49

fucking changes Yes, be a

1:26:51

man right and handle your fucking

1:26:53

business and take care of your fucking you Know

1:26:56

the woman that had your children and your kids Yeah,

1:26:59

make them feel safe and take care of them. Well,

1:27:01

I think we have our answer as to why I never

1:27:04

had a wife and children Look

1:27:23

if if you don't

1:27:26

think you can do that Well, and I never thought

1:27:29

I could then that is the right thing to do

1:27:31

not to do it It's not a bad thing to

1:27:33

not be a parent It's a bad thing to be

1:27:35

a parent and then do the job shitty is what

1:27:37

which is what you're saying as well But here's what

1:27:39

I'll disagree with you on is that I think that

1:27:42

every young man Doubts whether

1:27:44

they can do that But then you

1:27:46

surprise yourself when when you actually when

1:27:48

it happens and you dig deeper

1:27:50

and you Do things you never thought you

1:27:53

could do you mean for with kids? Yeah.

1:27:55

Yeah, well, yeah I'm sure that you know, I'm

1:27:57

sure you're right that if it would

1:27:59

have made dig deeper. So would

1:28:01

ayahuasca. Well listen, I think if you

1:28:03

had kids and had whatever you'd have

1:28:05

done, you did just fine anyway. You'd

1:28:07

have been able to take care of

1:28:09

your family. But

1:28:11

yeah, there's just something, there's something deep inside of

1:28:13

you. There's something with you. Just like my buddy,

1:28:16

some fucking reason why you guys don't want to get

1:28:18

married, don't have to have kids. But that's a

1:28:21

deeper dive and there's probably not enough time

1:28:23

on the fucking podcast to get into that

1:28:25

one. Oh, we have plenty of time because

1:28:27

my friend, uh,

1:28:30

that to me is a projection that

1:28:32

guys like you put on guys like me because

1:28:34

you cannot stand the

1:28:36

idea. No, no, maybe I disagree. I

1:28:39

don't. That's not true at all. You're not

1:28:41

hitting, seeing me here, sitting here going, Oh, you fucked

1:28:43

up. You don't know what you're missing. I have a

1:28:46

kids. I love my fucking kids more than anything, but

1:28:48

I have a really good friend of mine too that

1:28:50

I told you that doesn't want to have kids. And

1:28:52

he's a young guy. He's still fucking 39 years old.

1:28:54

He could have kids. Um, but he

1:28:56

doesn't want to. And I never argued the point with

1:28:59

him. I'm like, listen, you know what you want better

1:29:01

than I know what you want, but there's a reason

1:29:03

deep, deep down inside with you and with him, but

1:29:05

he's a very intellectual, smart

1:29:07

guy like you. And, um,

1:29:09

I don't know. Yeah. I bet you too could have

1:29:12

some fun fucking conversations. I got, I got to introduce

1:29:14

you to some time. You do it, hit it off.

1:29:16

You do it. And to actually end up becoming really

1:29:18

good friends. I

1:29:20

never had people say that

1:29:23

because like this, this every chance

1:29:25

we couldn't or might not, but I

1:29:28

feel like I often get along with more

1:29:30

of the, like the opposite, right?

1:29:33

You know, it's just more interesting when

1:29:35

there's somebody who's like you, it's like, why do

1:29:37

we not? Why do we need another me in

1:29:39

the room? You know what I mean? It's like,

1:29:41

we already got a me like, like, what the

1:29:44

fuck do we have to talk about? Yeah. I

1:29:46

mean, I don't want to agree on everything. Now

1:29:48

this guy's gonna like, he's gonna be a bird

1:29:50

dog and all these women.

1:29:53

I need this guy around here.

1:29:55

Tell your friend to go fuck

1:29:57

himself. I never liked him. Our

1:30:00

podcast is over. Do

1:30:07

you believe it went that way? No. It

1:30:09

didn't feel that long. Because it was fun. Yeah. So

1:30:12

much fun. Great to meet you.

1:30:14

You too. Likewise.

1:30:17

But we've got a new friend. Alright,

1:30:19

buddy. Alright, pal. It's a pleasure.