No matter how hard you try, you just can't fight the Homestuck.Join the Dice Will Roll gang on a Karkalicious adventure to the planet Alternia, where the insectoid humanoids called trolls divide their society into a hierarchy of blood, cars have bug legs and people make hexagon pizza specifically to piss off the poor. In a one-shot adventure that requires no knowledge of Homestuck, Dave makes his GMing debut and Derry takes a backseat as Minsie, Tialli and Saruti-- three trolls trying to solve a grim mystery-- team up and plunge into the sewers! Derry wrote the wholeass system we're using, and it's great!Posts get disliked. Mouths get peeked from. Instints get used.All this and more in this episode of Dice Will Roll, the Queerest Subgrubs & Snazzards Podcast on the Planet, where we ask the Hard Questions like... what pumpkin?

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CONTENT WARNINGS: Racism and classism analogies, parental abuse, cannibalism casual civilian death, dystopias, extreme poverty, body horror, open horniness, arachnophobia, anime fans

MUSIC:HIVESWAP: Act 1 Soundtrack. By James Roach and Toby Fox.HIVESWAP: Act 1 OST - 2. Snake EscapeHIVESWAP: Act 1 OST - 3. Joey Claire, ExtraordinaireHIVESWAP Friendship Simulator OST -- END OF FRIENDVANGELION by James RoachHiveswap Friendship Simulator Volume 3 OST: Bronya's ThemePESTERQUEST Volume 3 OST - Dave Strider Theme ("ill probably just name this one something normal oh no aw beans") by James Roach PESTERQUEST Volume 8 OST - Aradia Megido's theme ("yeah it is" by James Roach)HIVESWAP Friendship Simulator Volume 18 OST - Lanque's Theme - "yall know i just do the music right" by James RoachKnives and Ivory - Midnight CrewHIVESWAP Friendship Simulator Volume 13 OST - imagine, if you will, a situation wherein i wrote the bulk of this song at 4 am and then woke up only to discover the monstrosity i had created in my fleeting hubris by James Roach.HIVESWAP: Act 1 Soundtrack. By James Roach and Toby Fox.Homestuck Vol.6 - Heir Transparent - Blackest HeartHIVESWAP Act 2 OST B-SIDE – 7. DRONEHIVESWAP Act 2 OST – 17. Ticket to Ride - Down with the ClownAt the Price of Oblivion - 14 WSW-BeatdownTime On My Side-- Strife! Joren "Tensei" de Bruin & Toby "Radiation" Fox Homestuck Vol. 10 - 20 AscendLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices