0:01

Live from the Mercedes Benz Interview

0:03

Lounge.

0:05

Jay Shetty is right here. It's

0:09

so good to be back. Thanks for having me. You know, Jay,

0:13

I read lived like a month, thinks like a month than

0:15

a moth. That was what twenty twenty?

0:18

That's right, that's when it came out. Okay. But

0:21

I've heard you on all your podcasts, I've seen you all

0:23

over TV. You wake me up with meditation.

0:26

But still, when I look into your eyes, I feel like I'm swimming

0:28

in pools of ecstasies. Is

0:30

that a good thing? It is a good thing? Yeah? I mean,

0:32

are you? I mean it's a physical thing. And

0:34

I know that we should be talking about our hearts

0:36

and our minds, our spirits. But is it like

0:39

a shadow thing when people look into your eyes? I know you

0:41

hear a lot of people. You know what's really funny. I was

0:43

talking about this with someone else the other day. I

0:45

had a random aunt. I think everyone

0:47

has a random aunt. Had a random aunt when I was

0:49

young come up to me. I was overweight, growing up,

0:52

I struggled with being bullied and all the rest

0:54

of me. She came up to me. Here is Jay, you know what the

0:56

only nice thing about you physically.

0:59

She was talking about is your eyes

1:03

not even the shape of your eyes, just the

1:06

color. And I'll never forget it.

1:08

And I'll never forget it. It's just stated me for that

1:10

long. So you can see a scard. I am by it. But yeah,

1:13

it was just your night color. You're busted Tellian.

1:18

Yes, And I was like, you know what I'm saying.

1:20

Last time I saw one. She looked at me and she was like, my god,

1:22

you've got a little fat

1:26

Indiana them.

1:28

It's so great having Gandhi here is a part

1:31

of her family. You've been with us for how many years now?

1:33

Seven?

1:33

We've learned so much about Indian culture

1:36

with Gandhi, her mom and

1:38

her dad, her crazy dad. She invited

1:40

her dad in here to be on her podcast. And

1:43

can I say it?

1:44

Oh, I don't mind if you say it.

1:45

Because it's the it's a word that we don't like to use,

1:48

he said. Growing up, yes, she

1:50

would learn great things in life by leaps

1:53

and bounds, quantum leaps. But we

1:55

all thought she was retarded.

1:57

Yes, providers,

2:00

babysitters. He's like, watch out, there's something

2:02

wrong with right I And he

2:04

loves telling people this.

2:06

I'm good I'm Scottish. I mean it's just flattery.

2:08

Wow, I mean it's just flustered. As an Indian

2:11

kid, Yes, I wouldn't survived this long. Absolutely,

2:13

we have many things to celebrate here. Jay Jay's

2:16

wildly popular podcast On Purpose,

2:18

which is over five years and run in now

2:21

taking it on tour now, of course

2:23

millions and millions or ten millions of people love to

2:26

download this podcast, but taking

2:28

it on the road, it's a podcast. Well,

2:30

you can just sit in a room with a microphone. Why do

2:32

you have to get on a plane and travel to all these cities

2:35

to meet the people that love listening to you.

2:37

Yeah. What I'm really excited about is I think people

2:39

right now are looking for connection and

2:42

the fact that you can come to one of these events with doing fifteen

2:44

shows, fifteen surprise guests, you

2:47

can look left and right and you're going to see someone who's

2:49

like minded. You're going to see someone else who tunes

2:51

in every day every week to listen

2:53

to the podcast. You can walk out there with a new friend,

2:55

maybe a new girlfriend, maybe a new partner who knows And

2:58

I love the idea that people can actually

3:00

come and be in a space where

3:02

they feel safe where they feel connected, where they

3:04

feel they can reflect and everything else.

3:06

I was looking at this. Have you ever heard of

3:08

the third space theory? No? No telling. So

3:11

the third space theory says that basically, around

3:13

twenty five thirty years ago, we

3:15

had three spaces we spent time in. We

3:17

had home, we had work, and then we

3:19

had church or temple or a community

3:21

center or somewhere that you went. And then as

3:23

time went on, we lost that and it became home

3:26

and work, and then after the pandemic, it

3:28

became just home. So we eat where we're

3:30

meant to sleep, we sleep where we're meant to eat, and

3:32

we work where we're meant to sleep. Right, all

3:34

of our spaces are in one place,

3:36

So we've lost spaces where we can reflect

3:39

and connect. That was the purpose of church, a community

3:41

center, a space where you had space away

3:43

from home and work to think how to be better.

3:46

And I think this is that space. So I feel

3:48

like this event is going to provide that for people. Wow,

3:50

And I'm sure it's very much appreciated and

3:52

needed. Even you acknowledge

3:54

the people that you speak with day in and day out on

3:56

your podcast, they love what you bring to

3:58

them. The guests that you have. I mean, how

4:01

much fun are you having compared to let's

4:03

say, when you were just doing Facebook

4:05

videos or I've seen videos

4:07

of Jay Shetty in a room of like three people

4:10

speaking the same way he speaks now

4:12

to an arena of fifty thousand

4:14

people. Well, that was the joy of him. And we were

4:16

just talking about that, and it's been

4:18

such an incredible journey. I remember going to events

4:21

in rooms half the size of this and

4:24

zero people showing up, and I'd come back

4:26

the next week, I'd practice my speech. I'd come back the next

4:28

week, zero people showed up. And

4:30

then I realized I had to fire the person putting the flyers

4:33

up because obviously this

4:35

pre social media. And then the third

4:37

time I came, maybe two people came, maybe five people came.

4:39

I spent ten years speaking

4:41

to tiny rooms of people before I even

4:44

made a video. And so today, the

4:46

fact that there's millions of people listening, there's you

4:48

know, tens of thousands of people coming to events,

4:51

it's truly mind boggling to me. And I

4:53

live in gratitude because I can't believe it

4:55

myself. What was it that you think pushed that over

4:57

the edge to get all the people to come it. Truly,

5:00

it was the megaphone and

5:02

the the ease and

5:04

accessibility of social media. When

5:06

I was sitting in a room and speaking to small groups

5:09

of people, maybe they tell their friends and

5:11

maybe you'd get ten people the week after. The

5:13

fact that I could upload a video and

5:15

reach people all over the world is

5:18

now we take it for granted. Now it seems like the most obvious

5:20

thing. It's just when I started posting in twenty

5:22

sixteen, I couldn't believe it. So to

5:25

me, it just shows that today

5:27

in a world where I remember being rejected

5:29

by execs from having

5:31

a mindfulness video series idea because

5:33

they said I didn't have enough experience in media, I

5:36

remember being told by other

5:38

people in media that I shouldn't even try and get a job. I

5:40

remember just being shut down by the traditional

5:42

paths, And so to me, it's just a reminder to anyone

5:44

out there who has a dream of being in media,

5:47

hosting a show, whatever it may be, that

5:49

it is possible and you don't have to go down

5:51

the traditional route. A great takeaway from

5:53

where Jay was versus where Jay is now,

5:56

where we are versus where we were then, confidence

6:00

being able to be at

6:02

ease with people. Listening

6:04

to people's a very important thing. We've

6:06

all learned this over the years, as you have. And now would

6:09

you find in this day in twenty twenty

6:12

five, what's the number one thing people

6:14

want to take away from their time with you? And

6:16

how do you recognize that through them? And how do you deliver

6:18

that. There's two things that constantly

6:21

come up. One is the timelines

6:24

of life. Should I be married by

6:26

now? Should I have it all figured out? Should

6:28

I know what my purpose is? Should I know what

6:30

my career is? I think we all obsess over

6:32

these checklists and boxes

6:35

that we thought we were meant to live by, and

6:37

everyone's not living up to the timeline that their

6:39

parent or society. But to tell them

6:42

it's a heavy question to ask me to be answered.

6:44

I like to remind people that there

6:47

is no timeline, there is no deadline.

6:49

There are so many people who found what they loved

6:51

at fifty or sixty. There are so many people

6:53

who found it at twenty. Some people

6:56

found the person they loved at twenty but

6:58

didn't find their purpose still sick. Someone

7:01

found their ideal career at thirty

7:03

but didn't have children un till forty five, and

7:06

there wasn't a right or wrong way of doing it.

7:08

It was simply your time. And I think when we live

7:11

in a world that we constantly think I'm behind,

7:13

then, by the way, when you're ahead, you're thinking how long will it

7:16

last? And so you're constantly strapped

7:18

for time, whichever way you look at it. And

7:20

so I like to remind people that their

7:23

life is going at the pace and time that it's

7:25

meant to. What's more important figuring

7:27

out and identifying your purpose or the journey

7:29

to figure out and identify your purpose. It's

7:32

always about the pursuit, isn't it. It's always about

7:35

There's a great Nike published

7:38

this book and I don't know why they did it, but it's

7:40

this orange book that I have and I look at it

7:42

every morning, and on the front cover

7:44

they have this slogan which isn't just do

7:46

it. The slogan is there is

7:48

no finish line. And I love

7:51

that because it just takes away this pressure

7:53

that we're all trying to reach the top of the mountain,

7:55

the peak, this moment where everything

7:57

becomes easy and everything becomes okay, and

8:00

he goes, no, there is no finish line. Stop looking for

8:02

that the reason you think there is a finish

8:04

line, or thinking there's a finish line, it's

8:06

what causes stress because you feel far

8:08

away from it. It's what causes pressure.

8:11

It's what causes tension. Is the belief that there

8:13

is an end, a place that you reach where

8:15

none of this exists. Whereas as soon

8:18

as you accept that there is no finish line, you go, oh,

8:20

this is it. I'm living in it right now, this moment

8:22

is it. And if I can just live in it, then

8:25

that's beautiful. That's what's needed. So

8:27

if you're just turning us on, Jay Shetty is here,

8:29

Gandhi. You had a question.

8:31

So your life has evolved so much from

8:33

the time that you are working with monks, studying under

8:35

monks, I should say to now you're flying across

8:37

the world private planes, like it is completely

8:39

opposite of what it.

8:40

Used to be. The planes. I'm still waiting for those.

8:42

Okay, I'm in that part of in my head. But you're

8:44

traveling and you're huge. There's a huge

8:46

focus on you. Now, how do you reconcile

8:49

those two things? And do you have to work harder now

8:51

to find that same peace and stillness that you

8:54

had before?

8:54

For sure. I mean, it's it's

8:57

been twelve years since I left the monastery, and

8:59

twelve years starts to feel like longer

9:01

and longer and longer, especially because my

9:03

life feels so different today and

9:06

embracing the change of I am married, I

9:08

do have a podcast, I do have a

9:10

different life today, and a part

9:12

of me has to move forward into that.

9:15

And I think this is anyone who's grieving a

9:17

former life, right. I was just talking to my

9:19

friend yesterday who's had a baby

9:21

that he loves and adores, but at the same time, he's

9:23

like, there's parts I miss about you

9:25

know, what it looked like to just be married. It will be single, Like

9:27

you grieve a former life that you had,

9:30

but you have to be okay with life is changing and

9:32

moving. As soon as I get back this week to La,

9:35

my monk teacher who's going to be seventy five this year,

9:37

is going to come and live with us for a couple of weeks, and

9:39

I can't wait to wake up every day in the morning

9:41

early to meditate with him and to spend the evenings

9:43

talking with him. So I try to find

9:46

these ways of grounding. By the way, I'm reminded

9:48

every day that I am less monk

9:50

and less calm, And you know, but that's

9:52

the beauty of it. I think I've learned to relish the

9:54

battle in that when I'm on the

9:56

battlefield, I'm reminded of my weaknesses

9:58

and my flaws, which make me want to

10:01

meditate more and find more calm.

10:03

Whereas maybe if I was in a beautiful God, and I may

10:05

think I'm enlightened, but that might actually be

10:07

more dangerous. So there's a beauty

10:09

in being reminded every day that I

10:11

have an ego, that I have anxiety,

10:13

that I have stressed, that I compare myself to others,

10:16

that I'm human, and that encourages

10:18

me to take my practices more seriously. You

10:21

know, we live in this world full of hate

10:25

and awful news and

10:28

discourse and war, and

10:31

which is nothing new. It's been around

10:33

since long before we were here. It'll be here long after

10:35

we leave today. How

10:37

are we coping with these things? What's the best?

10:40

Sure far, push the button and

10:42

you're going to be better way to

10:44

maneuver through these obstacles that

10:46

we see through life.

10:48

But we also give ourselves because we become

10:51

anxious over these these days. I

10:53

think the challenge today is that

10:56

you don't find your news. News finds

10:58

you, right, You just scroll on TikTok

11:00

and you'll see something you don't even know the publication,

11:03

You don't even know the journalist, You don't even

11:05

know it's been vetted. You don't even know if it's true.

11:07

You don't even know if it's ai. You're real, and

11:09

all of a sudden, you're assuming that it is true,

11:12

that it's factual, that it's real, and

11:14

even if it's not, you're consuming it as it is. So

11:16

to me, the number one thing is don't wake

11:18

up to your phone. It's as simple

11:20

as that. Don't wake up to your phone. Don't make the

11:22

first thing you see in the morning news, negativity,

11:25

notifications and noise. You

11:27

would never let one hundred people

11:30

into your bedroom in the morning before

11:33

you've showered, put your makeup on, brushed

11:35

to your So you don't know me. Oh,

11:38

but I can't help you. Then,

11:41

what do we start our day with? As soon

11:44

as it's time to wake up and get

11:46

the train roll? And what

11:48

does that first hour look like? It isn't

11:50

even it doesn't even need to be an hour. I would

11:52

say it literally needs to be ten to fifteen minutes

11:55

of just waking up, walking

11:57

like a normal person like we used to do a few just a

11:59

few years by, and brushing your teeth and looking

12:01

in the mirror and then taking a shower like a

12:03

normal person. That

12:06

yeah, literally we all do it. Hold and me too, me too,

12:08

are holding the phone like this, and it's like, well, well,

12:10

let's just not do that. Let's actually brush our teeth

12:12

and guess what, you probably have cleaner teeth and

12:14

you'll have better teeth and all the rest of it. You shower

12:17

better, right, whatever it is like, just being present

12:19

in that activity for fifteen minutes, not even

12:21

an hour, and just allowing yourself and

12:23

your brain to catch up just as you would

12:25

you. I mean, you may let one hundred people into your bedroom

12:27

first thing in the morning, but yeah,

12:30

but but everyone else like you would never do

12:32

that. You would never let a hundred people come in

12:34

and say and your boss is emailing you. You

12:36

never let your boss walk into your bedroom and say, by the way,

12:38

I need that report first thing in the morning. You would never let

12:40

your mum come in and say why you're not married yet? You

12:42

never let you know whatever it is like. You would never

12:45

let someone just come into your bedroom and say, hey, these are

12:47

the three things you never do that you

12:49

have a certain boundary. So if we have a

12:51

physical boundary in our bedroom, why

12:53

not have a mental boundary in the bedroom of your

12:55

mind to say, I don't let notifications,

12:58

negativity, news, and noise come into

13:00

my mind. First thing in the morning, ten to fifteen

13:02

minutes tops. Okay, what about this, the day gets

13:04

started, you get you get on the train,

13:07

you get on the past, would get cracked?

13:09

Don before five pm? Hits? What

13:11

about those check ins during the day. You

13:14

can't just devote your entire life to something

13:16

else and someone else all day. You do need

13:18

to stop down and what during

13:20

the course of the day. One of the things I love, which

13:23

I put forward when I when I was teaching

13:25

meditation and mindfulness the company I

13:27

used to work at. One of the things that we in

13:29

stated that really helped was at the start

13:32

of every meeting, just have

13:34

everyone take three breaths. Just

13:36

start every meeting that way. I encourage you all to do as well

13:38

before every meeting. Right now, just three breaths.

13:42

Okay, he

13:45

really does. I was gonna say you took

13:47

one breath, and.

13:50

I was gonna say when he walked in. I think it was the right.

13:53

Take three. Reason why I'm saying the reason why I'm saying is

13:55

most of us are running from our last meeting

13:58

to our next meeting. With carrying the baggage from

14:00

our last meeting to our next meeting. Most of us are

14:02

not even present in today's meeting because we're still

14:04

thinking about the last one or thinking about the next

14:06

one. That moment that everyone gets

14:08

to align, if you think about it, everyone's coming in

14:10

at different places and different paces. Someone's

14:12

coming in and their kids late to school. Someone else is

14:14

coming in and they're thinking about the last meeting. Someone

14:16

else is coming in, they're thinking about the weekend. When

14:19

you will take three breaths in sync together,

14:21

you're now aligned. When you're aligned, you

14:23

now actually have the chance of actually helping, supporting,

14:26

being collaborative, and everyone else not carrying

14:28

that. So it's not the oh my gosh, the

14:30

three breaths. It's like, how do we get on the

14:32

same page as quick as possible and

14:35

give everyone space to decompress

14:37

and disconnect from everything else. Before this, we

14:39

sure have been using that word calibrate and recalibrate

14:42

a lot lately. Yeah, calibration is an interesting

14:44

thing. I always thought, well, this calibration, recalibration

14:47

concept, you can use that with anything

14:50

in life, with friends, with the people you're

14:52

dealing with at work, whatever. But

14:54

you have to find the way to recalibrate, and as

14:56

simply as something as simple as a breathing

14:58

exercise, truly, or some

15:01

silence. See, we can't be silent on

15:03

this show because alarms go off and

15:05

a computer in the back starts playing a song. It's like silly,

15:08

dead airs deadly on this show.

15:10

But to be able to stop down and have that

15:15

right there, that moment of silence, so

15:18

you were all kind of recalibrating as you do it. Absolutely,

15:21

I'm ready for a nap. That

15:23

happens when you slow down. Your buddy actually tells you what it

15:25

needs.

15:26

Yes, So for you, let's say,

15:28

in minutes or hours, however long it is, how much

15:30

time do you actually spend consuming

15:32

media on your phone? Because that's your platform. You're

15:34

putting things out and I'm assuming you're getting feedback

15:36

from people constantly. But that's also something

15:39

that would bring a lot of stress. So how much time do you spend

15:41

and how do you balance the show?

15:42

I try and spend time on my phone

15:45

in my gaps. So right now, if I'm taking

15:47

a new bid to another meeting or whatever, maybe

15:49

that's when I'll check and I'll reply to comments,

15:51

so I'll be connected because I enjoy doing that. But

15:54

I try not to be a consumer as much as

15:56

I am creating or

15:58

connecting. And I think for a lot of people, if you're

16:00

consuming, make sure what you're consuming is actually helping

16:02

you and making you feel better. And second

16:04

of all, create times of the day that are

16:06

no technology times and no technology

16:09

zones. So in your home, literally imagine

16:11

a laser around the

16:13

dining table. Literally imagine a laser

16:16

around the bedroom, Like those are zones

16:18

where you don't take your phone. Like imagine you took your phone

16:20

and your arm just got cut off because of this laser, Like,

16:22

you know, just imagine that for a second and allow yourself to

16:24

say, well, this is a space that we're

16:26

going to keep as a no technology zone. Like literally

16:29

put that sign up that has the red cross

16:31

against a picture of phone. Whatever it takes to realize

16:34

maybe there are certain spaces in your

16:36

home that are sacred. Maybe there are certain

16:39

spaces that are meant for connection and

16:41

love and talking to your kids or whatever it may

16:43

be. It doesn't have to be a whole day. And

16:45

so I think, rather than trying to be like I'm not going to look

16:47

at my phone all day, which we're all going to fail at,

16:49

let's say there's just a couple of times six

16:51

to eight pm every day, I don't look at my phone,

16:54

at the dining table, at the kitchen table, at

16:56

the bedroom, I don't look at my phone. That's

16:59

simple act will save you from

17:01

those hours of doom scrolling. Well, you

17:03

know you say that. I mean you could say that your

17:05

bedroom is your technology for you zone. But

17:08

there it is, that new digital vibrator.

17:13

I don't know I said phones. I didn't

17:15

say no to there's nothing works

17:18

that You heard the phone ring and you answer the vibrantor they're

17:21

always so if someone's talking to me. Look, we

17:24

have to remind everyone that Jay's

17:26

on purpose podcast on

17:29

tour is happening. We

17:31

need to get people in those seats. Yes, I'm

17:33

sure a lot of them are gone, but we

17:35

have a few left. Where do

17:37

I go to find out where I can see you? So

17:40

go to jyshetty dot me Forward

17:42

slash Tour in New York. We're gonna.

17:44

That's a lot of words. Jay Shetty dot me forward

17:46

slash tour. It's simple, it's really simple.

17:48

But we're going to be at the theater at

17:50

MSG and New York, so please come along.

17:53

If you're in LA we'll be at the Greek Theater. Uh.

17:55

And then of course we're at fifteen cities across North American

17:58

and Canada. So hold on, what if I just do ja me

18:01

and then I'll find the tour on there you will? You will.

18:03

But if you typing forward slash tour, you'll get there one. So that's

18:05

way too much for Look,

18:08

I have no brain cells. I'm speaking speaking

18:11

for the brain cells population. Before

18:13

you go, I want to ask who was your favorite guest?

18:15

Can you pay? Ooh, that's that's a

18:18

do you know what? Oh my gosh,

18:20

who's my favorite guest? I'll give my most recent favorite

18:22

guest because it was such an amazing show. It was having Benny

18:24

and Selena and at the same time, it was such

18:26

a special episode because they

18:29

just showed up in their rarest, most

18:31

vulnerable, most honest and what was really

18:34

beautiful is the episode was all over TikTok and Instagram,

18:36

but the conversation was all around positive

18:38

masculinity and the comments were hilarious.

18:41

There's one comment that says, I'm just leaving this on

18:43

loud so that my husband can hear what Bennie has

18:45

to say. And it was just beautiful to see

18:47

people talking about the need for emotionally intelligent

18:50

love when usually when we're talking about love or you

18:52

know, whatever it may be, today, there's always some sort of gossip

18:55

or stress or whatever it may be. This was a beautifully

18:57

evolved conversation going viral, So it

19:00

was beautiful.

19:01

Wow, do you have a least favorite guest?

19:04

I'll tell you this

19:07

was always goes to the menacing

19:09

side.

19:10

I asked the questions that people want to know.

19:14

Jay, we love that you're here today. Thank you so much,

19:17

and yeah, you know it's easy and needed

19:19

to hear these podcasts when you have your time alone

19:22

with Jay uh, but also to be

19:24

in the same room, to be in that space where

19:26

you are rarely rarely with

19:28

j Shetty. What a gift. How many?

19:30

How many cities and steam fifteen cities

19:33

and fifteen surprise guests too, So some of your favorites

19:35

from the show, some exciting new ones. You'll

19:37

get to see someone you love to. Jay does have a private

19:40

plane. It has United Britten on the side of it

19:44

on purpose. The live tour with j

19:46

Shetty. Go to Jshetty dot me

19:49

and then search for the tour. No

19:53

go. They get confused. It's a lot of letters. They

19:55

won't sell me jetty dot com whoever has

19:57

it? Yeah, who I'll

20:00

go. Some guy called taking

20:04

care of sal You guys are the last. That's

20:09

weird. Elvis Duran in the Morning

20:11

Show