0:00

Heidi (2): Hello. Oh, my beautiful introvert.

0:03

Friend. And intrepreneur welcome to episode number 23, where we're

0:09

going to talk about habits. For ease.

0:13

In your business for intrepreneurs.

0:17

And if you're also a projector or anyone that has a variable energy

0:23

flow, maybe you have some mental health considerations, a lot of anxiety or

0:30

some physical health considerations.

0:33

That mean that you don't show up in your business the way it looks like

0:38

other people do and the way other people recommend, because you're different.

0:43

Your unconventional. And that is totally okay.

0:49

I want to really normalize that.

0:52

You can have a successful business.

0:56

That works for you. And that's what this podcast episode is really based on.

1:02

So if you're in a point in your business where you're feeling like

1:07

there's just always too much to do, you can never get it done.

1:11

You're feeling overwhelmed and you're, you've been here long enough for you.

1:16

Like, oh my gosh, this isn't changing. I'm trying all of these things, but I'm kind of stuck here.

1:22

And I'm doing all the things that people say to do, but it's not working.

1:27

For me. Or also you just don't like doing business that way you don't like hustling

1:34

or being on social media, 24 7, right.

1:38

So, what we're really going to look at today is not so much

1:44

specific habits that to do, but the concepts underlying the habits.

1:51

So that you can then choose from the millions of options for how

1:57

to have strategies and self care to find what fits you based on

2:03

your needs, your unique energy.

2:07

And really my goal is for you to not just feel relief in your business,

2:13

but for you to come back to yourself for you to feel like your true self

2:19

at the core of your business, because success that comes from there.

2:25

It's going to feel so good.

2:28

Versus success that comes from hustling and forcing other people's strategies

2:33

won't feel authentic or, or sustainable.

2:37

And so often you'll just get to a place where you're ready to throw the towel in.

2:42

I see this all the time. I have been here myself.

2:46

And let us help you.

2:48

And I want to help you today to really instead of going down that

2:54

path to burn out and throwing in the towel of actually low.

2:59

Being able to use the discomfort and the problems in your business to help you find

3:05

your way, your path to your true self.

3:09

Your way of working. Because I, you know, I know in business we're focused on the results it's

3:16

like, especially in the coaching world.

3:19

There's so much around numbers and whether that is number

3:25

of clients or income numbers.

3:28

And it really. I think it really detracts from the whole purpose of courts we need to eat.

3:36

And of course we want to be financially abundant.

3:39

But oftentimes in order to do that, we're sacrificing.

3:43

Right now we're making decisions that create pressure and hustle.

3:48

And that ultimately are not an experience we want to have.

3:53

So I want you to create the experience that you want.

3:57

Independent of the results that you're getting.

4:01

And of course. Of course, you want to get results from your business?

4:05

Cause, cause why, why do it in the end you do need to survive.

4:09

But if you can have the experience that you want.

4:13

And have results. Amazing so much better.

4:17

You know, it's kind of like like you're navigating a big city.

4:22

Might be New York. It might be San Paulo and you're asking people how the

4:27

heck to I get to the museum.

4:30

And. Everyone will have a different way, depending on where they're at.

4:35

If you're, if they're live, they live in the west side.

4:37

If they live in the north side, they're going to tell you a different path.

4:41

They are all valid. They all work for certain people, but your way, you're going to have to find.

4:49

On E. Not on your own, but you're the one who will know.

4:53

Right. You will know. I prefer going through the park or I prefer going downtown and really

5:00

building her business is a lot of that.

5:03

It's like finding your way, asking for advice, but ultimately,

5:07

always coming back to yourself.

5:12

Also this episode is going to be the season finale of

5:19

season two, introverts at work.

5:22

As I am going on travels and maintaining the podcast,

5:28

although I absolutely love it.

5:31

It does not feel in alignment with some of the experience that I

5:37

want to have while I'm traveling.

5:40

And that doesn't mean that I won't pop in maybe with a special episode.

5:44

I'm not sure. And also I am looking forward to having time to regroup, to

5:50

digest where the season has gone.

5:53

I've really been exploring introverts at work, in different capacities

5:58

and moving into entrepreneurship.

6:00

And I am finding my way here too.

6:03

And it's important for me in my process.

6:06

To have time to reflect without having added pressure to be producing too much.

6:12

So. I am giving myself the gift of a break.

6:19

And we'll see when I come back, I'll be gone for over a month.

6:22

So that puts us into a November.

6:26

And so stay tuned. For what is to come.

6:29

Some great as we move into the episode.

6:34

I do want you to know that if you need more support to figure out your

6:40

habits, your systems, your processes. And put things into place.

6:44

Right now I have a package called systems for ease.

6:48

That is all about doing the deep downloading analysis and

6:53

figuring out a plan for you to.

6:57

Create habits and systems and processes in your business that fit.

7:02

You, and that will guide you through the next six months of your business.

7:08

So that will give you clarity and support and really help you be in alignment with

7:15

the experience you want to have and the truth of who you are in your business.

7:19

So you can find more about that. In the show notes or on my website.

7:24

Heidi, Jen, dell.com forward slash ease.

7:29

Habits for ease in your business as an intrepreneur.

7:34

I am pulling this information based on my education and experience.

7:41

I where it is a combination of yoga, yoga.

7:46

Has a deep, deep roots in our roots, but it's concerned with its.

7:52

It's a practice. It's a philosophy of thousands of years old concern with well being and how to

7:59

help you feel at peace and in connection.

8:04

And I are Veda. Is the sister science to yoga, which puts that into practice

8:11

in terms of all kinds of habits.

8:14

And ways of understanding.

8:17

Self care nutrition.

8:21

And even medicine. I also bring in life coaching, which I get through the life coach school,

8:27

which is very like mind and emotion based as well as tapping, which is

8:33

very much about the nervous system. Yoga.

8:37

Tons about the nervous system. And then I've got my own studies on introversion and human design.

8:44

And my experience as a business owner for the past 20 years and

8:50

working with lots of business owners, as colleagues, as clients.

8:55

As me being the client. I have seen, I have seen all kinds of businesses, especially online ones from,

9:04

you know, 20 making 20 bucks a month to making 200,000 and more a month.

9:12

Heidi: Now let's look at the concepts behind habits for ease.

9:18

The first is reducing stimulation.

9:21

Now stimulation is any kind of input that comes into your body

9:25

through your senses, your mind. And it might be the quantity of information.

9:32

It might be the number of meetings, the number of offers that you're selling.

9:37

All of this, it creates more to think about more, to do more, to

9:43

transition and care for and keep in your brain or to organize.

9:49

And that leads to a lot of tasks switching.

9:52

So moving from task to task.

9:54

That creates stimulation.

9:57

As opposed to having blocks of focus time, where you are pinpointed, widely

10:02

focused on getting something done. Also distractions in the environment.

10:08

They create stimulation.

10:12

And I Aveda. Views all of this in terms of what's called the Vata energy and its

10:19

its characteristics are movement.

10:22

And overwhelm and anxiety.

10:25

I like to call it hurricane in the brain.

10:28

So finding ways to reduce and simplify.

10:33

Help to Reduce the amount of stimulation that your nervous system

10:38

receives and needs to process.

10:41

And that stimulation, it creates often, most times some form of stress.

10:48

So less stimulation, less stress.

10:52

The next concept is mindset care.

10:56

Now, I don't know about you, but I really never learned any processes to look at my

11:02

thoughts and the way that I'm talking with myself and what that's creating for me.

11:09

I did learn a little bit about meditation as a kid, but I never really practiced at.

11:14

So and mindset care, it's really having awareness of your thoughts.

11:23

And the quality of them and.

11:25

And how you relate to your thoughts and to yourself.

11:30

So the more kind and understanding you are the less stress you're going to create.

11:40

The more support you are going to feel.

11:45

Emotions like urgency and pressure a lot often time become from

11:51

the way that you are thinking.

11:54

Which is very much under your control.

11:58

It can be habitual, but you can change it.

12:02

Right. So. Mindset care might look like.

12:08

In the morning before you start your work.

12:11

You take a moment to observe the thoughts that you have, write them down.

12:16

And the thoughts that you ha you have, it's just that

12:19

ongoing chatter in your brain.

12:21

And notice, are they creating stress?

12:24

Are they creating pressure or urgency?

12:26

Shame. And having tools to work through them.

12:32

Not, not like pretending they're not there, but to work through,

12:36

to process and transform so that you are moving into a mindset of

12:42

greater empowerment, greater love.

12:45

This is a lot of what I do in my one-on-one coaching.

12:51

The next concept is really paying attention to your nervous

12:55

system, nervous system of care.

12:59

You might think about this as stress management.

13:01

So your nervous system. It will respond to stimulus and it's either, you know, stressed out well.

13:11

Balance say balance is somewhere in the middle.

13:15

If you think about an Oreo cookie, the balance is that lovely cream middle.

13:20

And then there's an unbalanced state on the top, which is the kind of hyper.

13:26

Energized stress. And then that bottom cookie layer is the low energy stress.

13:33

Depression lethargy. Afton times as a sensitive person.

13:38

You're thinking more about that energized stress.

13:43

You know, like the anxiety and the panic.

13:46

So you can feel more resilient.

13:51

When you're nourishing your nervous system and there are yoga practices.

13:57

Tapping. Herbs food.

14:00

Like there's all kinds of habits that you can use to do this.

14:05

But most importantly, it's like thinking about.

14:08

How to use these habits.

14:11

In your daily flow. Like before you go to bed, when you work up and wake up in the morning.

14:18

Before you open your email. Right.

14:21

Having some way to calm your nervous system.

14:25

Before or after stressful experiences.

14:29

Like a meeting. So you have an important conversation.

14:32

Happening, having tools ready, having that awareness and time

14:36

to nourish your nervous system. Maybe it's just one minute.

14:40

Before. And then afterwards to process and calm down your nervous system.

14:47

When you do this, that stressful moment, it is book ended in ways

14:53

that help you ease back into a more baseline, a more easeful state.

15:02

And then thinking about transitions when you move from one activity to another.

15:09

That is such a perfect moment for you too.

15:12

Connect with your nervous system. I E.

15:15

Your stress levels. And pull in a habit.

15:19

Might be as simple as three.

15:22

Deep breaths into the belly. Or laying on the ground for a couple of minutes.

15:29

You want to identify those places in your day, in your workflow,

15:35

where you feel your stress spike. And resourced yourself with habits that will help to calm your nervous

15:42

system and connect with your source.

15:48

Similarly energy care or energy management.

15:54

So often. In our culture, we have this idea.

15:57

We should be on all the time.

16:00

Right. It's crazy.

16:03

It's like, there's this level of productivity.

16:05

Like you're only productive if you're reaching for the 11, for example.

16:11

And oh my gosh, like that, like doesn't really work for anybody.

16:16

But especially for those of us who have lower energy resources or have

16:23

this, the need to retreat often, like that is just going to blow us out.

16:28

Instead. Think about your energy as a sign wave.

16:33

There is an ebb and flow and that the more that you can keep

16:38

a balance to the ebb and flow.

16:42

Then the more you're going to feel.

16:45

At ease. Right.

16:47

Balancing effort. With ease.

16:51

This might look like having, you know, having your client calls.

16:56

You do three weeks of every week, you have your client calls.

16:59

And then on that fourth week of the month, You don't do client calls.

17:04

In fact, you, maybe you schedule some catch-up work, admin work,

17:08

something that requires less.

17:11

Energy from you, maybe you don't schedule anything there at all.

17:17

I know. Crazy.

17:22

And with your energy management, it's important to consider, of course, what,

17:26

what else is happening in your life?

17:28

COVID really drove this home for us.

17:31

When you have a lot of stress happening in one area of your life.

17:35

Ideally you need to help adapt the other areas of your life so that

17:41

you can help to keep your energy.

17:45

Keep yourself from burning out and sometimes you need

17:49

more rest than other times. The seasons are another place where you can sync your energy

17:57

with the qualities of the seasons.

18:00

Talk a lot about this in Irita.

18:03

But you can choose different activities based on whether it's

18:07

summertime and you're feeling. More energized and expansive versus winter time where you're more introverted.

18:16

And naturally spending more time inside.

18:19

When you sync your activities that way.

18:23

You don't have to push against.

18:26

The energy that's happening around you, you can just kind of get on and

18:30

write it and allow yourself to, to be held in that flow of the seasons.

18:40

And most importantly, when it comes to energy management, It's

18:44

about knowing your own needs.

18:46

You know, if you are not one of those people who is like, Like

18:52

has a huge energy resources.

18:55

And you know, we kind of build our society around that expectation.

19:01

Then it's really, really important for you to engage in a loving,

19:08

compassionate self-study. To discover where your energy flows and when you would benefit form a

19:16

more rest, more quiet, more retreat.

19:21

And then allow yourself that begin to build it into your.

19:25

Like your schedule, the way that you manage your time and from a

19:30

place of support and acceptance.

19:35

And letting go of the shame because.

19:39

Typically we have w comments in our head.

19:44

We have those social pressures about being productive.

19:48

That then creates shame for us.

19:51

So that's one of those things in the mindset area that you

19:54

can give some attention to. And when you let that go.

19:59

You just, sometimes it's a practice sometimes it's, you know, there's,

20:03

there's a, there's a relationship there that you have to manage for over time.

20:08

But when you can move more into respecting your energy and

20:13

building your business around it.

20:15

Then it's going to feel more useful. A hundred percent.

20:21

The next concept for.

20:24

More easeful habits or habits for more ease.

20:28

In your business. Is to.

20:32

Approach. Growth in eight gentle.

20:36

Expansive and curious way.

20:41

To build in reflection into your work process.

20:45

This is so important. For you to really reflect and observe.

20:52

How your businesses feeling, what is working.

20:55

For you on, on different levels, on an energy level, on a client

21:01

level, on a financial level.

21:04

And to really inform your decisions from your experience that you're having.

21:11

And use the, the, the successes.

21:15

And especially using the discomforts or the quote unquote failures.

21:21

To learn and extract.

21:25

Just one arch tooth. Things items that you can experiment on, continue to try,

21:32

but modify in a different way.

21:38

And approaching this from really a place of you know, you're evaluating, but

21:45

it's from a place of totally accepting, like accepting the experience versus

21:51

evaluating it so you can fix it.

21:55

You know, so often. We just want to get to the result.

21:59

We have radar on an urgent mission to make money.

22:04

And so when we see something's not working, that we think that we're

22:07

doing it wrong, we feel bad about it. We see everyone else doing it differently and whatnot, and

22:12

it just creates a lot of drama.

22:15

That you can drastically reduce by moving into acceptance.

22:23

Yeah. Then the last concept that I want to share today.

22:29

Is the, to create more ease.

22:33

Is to have clarity on your vision, mission, and values.

22:39

For yourself. And your business.

22:42

No, you are the foundation of your business.

22:45

It's an extension of who you are.

22:48

So, when you are clear on what your values are, like you value kindness, you value.

22:54

Authenticity you've, you know, you value learning.

22:59

And. Writing it down.

23:04

That will help you. No.

23:07

Hello. Inform your decisions.

23:11

So the same is true for your mission.

23:13

It's like, who do you serve? How do you serve them?

23:18

Why do you serve them? What is the impact?

23:21

That you hope to create that you are working towards.

23:26

Then what is the vision vision?

23:28

What is the vision that you are creating?

23:30

What is it that you would love to see that you are this like life

23:36

personal life, business, life. And the impact that your business has, you know, think big here.

23:43

When you have these three pieces.

23:46

They make and you base them.

23:49

On what we've just talked about.

23:51

These concepts for knowing yourself, your energy, your mindset.

23:57

And when the, when FA. Values mission and vision.

24:01

Really truly reflect who you are.

24:04

And it might take some time to figure out what they are.

24:07

They don't need to be perfect. Then you can use them to make decisions, to quote unquote justify.

24:16

Maybe some of the crazy ways that you're doing business, like taking a week

24:20

off every, every month or, you know, a Friday off every week, whatever it is.

24:26

Because that reflects your values.

24:30

It reflects your vision for what work can be.

24:37

So those are the concepts. We've got reducing stimulation.

24:43

Mindset care, nervous system care.

24:47

Energy care and management.

24:51

Gentle growth and clear values, mission and vision vision.

24:58

So from here. These concepts.

25:01

They'll help you choose your habits, the systems and the processes.

25:05

That you build into your business. And think about this in a holistic way.

25:10

It's not just like. The That you're using slack for your communication with your clients.

25:17

But how you want slack to integrate into the rest of your life.

25:22

Like, do you wake up in the morning, roll out of bed and check your slack?

25:26

No, do not do that. You know, you might have fixed times you're on slack from nine to 12 every day.

25:33

Boom. That's it. And.

25:37

Feel free to experiment, you know, don't sometimes we think that

25:42

we're in that fixing mine, we think it has to be a certain way.

25:46

And then we bring in that rigid rigidity, we create pressure and then

25:51

w we don't follow through or fall through in perfectly, and we feel shame.

25:55

And then we go right back into our old negative feedback loops.

26:02

Building your business is a process of self discovery of experimentation.

26:08

Finding the habits that work for you.

26:11

Are, you know, it's an ongoing experiment.

26:16

And so often. I don't want to like overly plug coaching here, but I know for

26:23

me, That I get so overwhelmed.

26:26

My system gets overwhelmed that when I have some support, when I have a coach.

26:31

When I have a mastermind or, you know, some other place where I am

26:37

regularly showing up and reflecting and being held accountable.

26:43

That it is, it just creates strength and a container for me to do this kind of work.

26:50

And in a way that is more efficient and feels just more connected and lovely.

26:58

So putting it into practice, what does it look like?

27:02

And I'll just share one potential example here.

27:06

So one thing that I hear a lot of people like can be.

27:11

Complain about. It has being on social media.

27:15

No posting on social media. We hear that we're supposed to be on there every day.

27:19

I had recently a coach say that.

27:22

That. With this economy, you need to be showing out multiple times a day.

27:27

And you know what I think about that? I was like, hell.

27:30

No. I, if I have to, no, that's just not happening, but like, We hear this and

27:39

you might be doing this where you think, okay, I need to be on there every day.

27:43

I need to do video. I need to be, you know, consistency is king.

27:48

And then you feel pressure. You feel stress and you don't follow through, you don't do that.

27:54

Right. So you feel an adequate. And then you think that then you blame yourself.

27:58

You think that, oh, like I'm not getting as much response as they should.

28:03

There you go. But right into some crazy negative thinking.

28:08

But even if you do do it, like you end up pushing.

28:13

Beyond your natural energy flow.

28:16

And that not only does it.

28:20

It depletes you, but it feels.

28:23

In authentic. Other people since that.

28:26

And then it ends up not really working.

28:30

Plus as the it's not a sus like as the basis for creating clients in your

28:36

business, it's not really sustainable.

28:39

So eventually you're going to, it's just going to come to a stop at some point.

28:43

But the whole experience, like you ended up using it against yourself and.

28:48

You feel limited, you feel exhausted and it erodes your relationship with yourself.

28:56

Yeah, so. We have a lot of places in our business where we do that.

29:04

So what do you do. I want to give you some questions to help you.

29:10

On your journey to more easeful habits.

29:15

The first thing to do. Is to take a piece of paper and just real quickly write out all the areas where you

29:22

feel stressed in your business, right?

29:25

This might be social media. It might be you're responding to clients.

29:28

It might be working with a certain kind of client.

29:31

It might be a new offer, whatever listed out, list them all out.

29:36

And then pull out your top three.

29:40

With those with each one of those, I want you to grab a

29:43

new piece of paper and write.

29:47

Right at the top, you know, social media being consistent

29:49

on social media, whatever it is. And then ask yourself.

29:54

Why am I doing it this way?

29:59

I want you to notice where this comes from, is it coming from because you

30:04

paid a bunch of money to somebody and they told you that this is the

30:07

way that they did it, is it because you see it working for other people?

30:12

You know, why are you doing it that way?

30:16

The next question. It's what is my relationship with myself around this?

30:24

You know, am I pushing myself? Am I being critical.

30:28

Am I being supportive and loving and gentle, or my shaming myself.

30:34

Yeah. Notice the quality of your relationship, the thoughts and the feelings.

30:41

Then the next question. Is if I allowed myself to do it the way that I truly want.

30:49

What would it look like? And I want you to spend time with this because our initial reaction will most

31:00

likely be to tell it to go fuck itself.

31:02

Right? Like fuck social media.

31:06

But. Oftentimes.

31:11

It's not all bad. Like we're moving from one end of the spectrum of the other.

31:15

So. Ask yourself, you know, how would, how would I, if I did it the way I

31:20

actually want, what would it look like? Let yourself, like, kind of get the rage out.

31:27

And then ask how else. How else could I do it?

31:31

How else would I do it and love it. Right.

31:34

How else, how else hell else, ask yourself how else?

31:37

Over and over and over. Until you get.

31:42

Complete you feel complete. And then the last question is if I showed up.

31:48

That way. The way that you allow yourself to show up.

31:53

What would the impact be? Impact on your relationship with yourself?

32:00

With your business with your clients.

32:03

With your finances. Impact with your community.

32:09

Okay. All right.

32:12

My friends. This was an awesome episode.

32:16

I'm really glad to end the season on this note.

32:20

I hope that you take this and.

32:23

Spend some time, come back to it, take some notes and really

32:27

integrate it to find that relief, to find your way of doing things.

32:33

And know that I am here. To help.

32:36

Either with systems for ease.

32:39

We have one-on-one coaching. You have any questions you just want to let me know.

32:46

What your experience is like, you can find me.

32:49

On social media. Oh, my website.

32:52

I'd love to hear from you, especially why while I am on my,

32:58

my travels and in between seasons.

33:00

So. Thank you so much for tuning in for being here in season

33:05

two of the empowered introvert. And I wish you an amazing October and I look forward to connecting in the future.

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So take care of friends and I will see you next time.