0:16

Hello everyone and welcome to Everything Iconic with

0:18

me, Danny Pellegrino. I bet you didn't think

0:20

you were going to hear from me again

0:22

this week because I just released an episode

0:24

on Monday. But surprise, I'm here because The

0:26

Valley just premiered and of course I had

0:29

to cover The Valley. And so here's the

0:31

deal. Here's what I've decided with Everything Iconic.

0:33

So we got this extra episode this week

0:35

and now going forth. As we

0:37

move forward, we're going to be releasing the new

0:39

episodes on Wednesday nights, Thursday mornings. Wednesday nights,

0:41

Thursday mornings. So we're still to be covering Summer

0:43

House. We're going to be diving into the

0:45

valley. But I wanted the episodes to feel a

0:47

little more current. And I wanted

0:49

them to be a little closer to our

0:51

episodes as they air on Bravo. And so

0:53

we do have an extra episode this week.

0:56

And then next week and going forth, the

0:58

episodes will be released on Wednesday nights after

1:00

Summer House airs. So Wednesday nights, you could

1:02

check the podcast feed on Thursday mornings if

1:04

you'd like. And we're going to be covering

1:06

the Valley and Summer House. In the Valley, you guys,

1:08

the premiere was so incredible. I mean, first

1:10

of all, look at all the promo that they're

1:12

doing. They're putting money behind it because there's a

1:14

lot going on in the Valley. It's a fantastic

1:17

season ahead, I believe, because they wouldn't be putting

1:19

all the marketing muscle behind it if it was

1:21

a flop season. And after watching the premiere twice,

1:23

that's right, I watched it twice. I

1:26

can confidently say that we have a

1:28

season ahead because there's a thousand storylines going

1:30

on. There's so many different threads to

1:32

follow. Of course, if you've been following the

1:34

news of Jax and Brittany, our Kentucky

1:36

muffin, you know that they're going through all sorts

1:39

of different things. Them alone would be

1:41

enough to carry a whole season. And yet

1:43

we have all the Kristen and Janet

1:45

stuff. We got Danny and Nia maybe having

1:47

another kid. We got hair, got new hair.

1:49

I mean, we got a lot going on. A

1:51

thousand different things. I

1:58

am so excited. I feel more

2:00

alive than ever. I'm so excited. So I

2:02

can't wait to get into the Valley. Again, they're

2:04

putting all this huge marketing money behind it.

2:06

And they didn't do that in the first season.

2:08

And I actually did some promo stuff for

2:10

them with this thing on the Universal lot. And

2:12

so it's going to be on social media.

2:14

They've already posted a couple of clips and stuff.

2:16

But when I got there, I was so

2:18

surprised because it was like a full -blown production. Not

2:21

only that, but they also did a premiere

2:23

for it. And they don't always do the premieres

2:25

for every one of these shows. And so

2:28

what that leads me to believe is that they

2:30

know that they got a cash cow on

2:32

their hands. And of course, Vanderpump Rules

2:34

is out. We're out with that old show.

2:36

And so they're ushering in the valley.

2:38

And so we got a lot to be

2:40

excited about. Now, speaking of Vanderpump Rules,

2:42

they are rebooting that show. And it seems

2:44

to me like they're setting us up

2:47

for she -she. Lala and Schwartz

2:49

to join the Valley. Because they started

2:51

filming aftershows for this season of

2:53

the Valley. And if you pay attention

2:55

to that, they've been putting Sheena,

2:57

Schwartz, and Lala in those aftershows. So

2:59

I don't even know if they've aired the

3:01

aftershow yet. Though they haven't aired the aftershow

3:03

yet, I guess. But they're going to be in

3:05

the aftershows because they saw some pictures or

3:07

something somewhere. I hope I didn't just dream that

3:09

up. I hope that was

3:11

a real thing that happened in my dreams. But

3:13

they are sort of folding them in. Now,

3:16

I feel like Sheena and Schwartz make a

3:18

little more sense to me on there than La

3:20

La, because I don't really seem, I don't

3:22

know if it makes sense, but I also don't

3:24

even think we need Schwartz and Sheena there.

3:26

Like, to me, it's fine if they kind of

3:28

pop in once in a while, but I

3:30

feel like after watching the premiere that they got

3:32

so many things going on with the current

3:34

cast and these new people, and I'm so excited

3:36

about the new people. Like, I want to

3:38

know what's their new mess. And I am really

3:40

interested in this Jesse Lally character who's very

3:42

much, like, reminds me of that guy from American

3:44

Psycho. He mentioned that in the episode, Patrick

3:46

Bateman. And I was like, oh, yes, that's spot

3:48

on, Jesse Lally. And I'm interested in what's

3:50

going on with him and Michelle, which we're

3:52

going to get to. And, of course, the

3:54

Janet and Jason of it all, Janet's feud

3:56

with Kristen is interesting to me. And so

3:59

I don't know that we need more people.

4:01

Although I am concerned for Danny. I'm concerned

4:03

for Danny and Nia. They want to have

4:05

another kid. And so they're going to have,

4:07

what, four under four? I'm

4:11

expecting my first, and that's exhausting enough. I

4:13

can't even imagine four under four. And that

4:15

man in that house, he keeps saying, like, let's

4:17

move somewhere else. We have a yard and

4:19

a house and stuff. Because here in Los Angeles,

4:21

the spaces can be small. Not quite as

4:23

small as New York. I know in the city

4:25

in New York, sometimes you could rent out

4:27

the tiny little shoebox and it's a million dollars

4:29

a month, especially in this economy. Ladies, am

4:31

I right? But here in Los Angeles, too, it's

4:33

like you're paying a lot of money for

4:35

the rents and stuff. And to have four little

4:37

kids in a small, I don't know how

4:39

big their place is, but they keep talking about

4:41

moving out of it. And I'm concerned about

4:43

Danny because he seems like he is

4:45

scared. scared all the time. And he's got

4:47

that smile sort of plastered on his

4:49

face. He's got a nice demeanor about him.

4:51

Don't get me wrong. I mean, aside

4:53

from last season, we did see some cracks

4:55

in that armor. But as it stands,

4:58

he's almost got like this robotic demeanor always

5:00

on his face. But then underneath it

5:02

all, you can feel some menacing nature or

5:04

some uneasiness. You know what he reminds

5:06

me of? This is going to be an

5:08

obscure reference, but the holiday junkies out

5:10

there know what I'm talking about. But the

5:12

movie Santa Claus 2 with Tim Allen. I

5:16

am sorry to bring that up. But

5:18

the sequel to the first Santa Claus movie

5:20

with Tim Allen from Home Improvement. Wait,

5:22

I didn't do that good. Wait,

5:24

that was bad too. But you know what I'm

5:27

saying. Home Improvement's Tim Allen. He

5:29

did a sequel to the Santa Claus.

5:31

And in that sequel, there are these

5:33

weird, there's sort of like this weird

5:35

toy version of Santa. So he plays like

5:37

this very glossy, I don't know how to

5:39

explain it. I don't even think I'm doing

5:41

it right. But maybe just look

5:43

up like Tim Allen, Robot Santa. Just

5:46

Google that when we're done here. That's

5:49

who Danny reminds me of. It's sort

5:51

of like this weird kind of like

5:53

plastered look on his face that he's

5:55

trying to pretend everything's going good. But

5:57

underneath it all, you're like, uh -oh,

5:59

Danny, he's feeling like he's fucked. He's got

6:01

four under four coming. Because

6:03

we know in real time, Nia got

6:05

pregnant. And by the way, Nia's like the

6:08

most stunning person on television. I do

6:10

think she's so, so incredible. And

6:12

then also... Let's just get into the

6:14

episode. We're also going to talk about

6:16

Summer House this week, because I have a lot of

6:18

thoughts about that. But first, we're starting

6:20

with the Valley Baby. Buckle up, buttercup. Okay,

6:24

so we open with all this Jack stuff.

6:26

Now, I have a lot of thoughts

6:28

on that demon. I do not care for

6:30

him. I am very upset with him.

6:32

And I do have to point out that

6:34

he was the one who was doing all this

6:36

demonic behavior. It's

6:39

insane what's going on with him and Britney.

6:41

It makes me very uncomfortable. I don't even

6:43

think he should really be on the show

6:45

after hearing what he flipped the table and

6:47

he bruised her on the knee and Cruz

6:49

was in the house. Get

6:51

the fuck out. I mean, I'm just disgusted.

6:53

And then also, so that

6:55

happened. And then he kicks

6:57

Britney out of the house. Are

7:01

you fucking kidding me? Like, you're acting like

7:03

a demon. We find out he's been on coke

7:05

all the time. Not only that, but last

7:07

season, do you remember if you watched last season, he

7:09

was giving Britney a hard time about her drinking. All

7:12

she wanted was a date night. She just wanted

7:14

her date night. And then he was giving

7:16

her all this gruff about how she's drinking too

7:18

much. Remember they went on that cast trip for

7:20

Janet's Babymoon where they didn't invite hair? And then

7:22

he was giving her all this shit about Britney's

7:24

drinking too much, Britney's drinking too much. Come to

7:26

find out, he's been on coke every

7:28

five seconds. Or, you know,

7:30

he had to go to rehab for Coke or something. It

7:32

was a Coke addiction, which, spoiler

7:34

alert, I don't think anyone was that surprised he

7:37

was on Coke all those years watching Vanderpump

7:39

Rules. I think we could all see through the

7:41

screen. If you were watching the TV, you

7:43

could understand that he was on cocaine. And

7:45

then I don't like how they're, it's like,

7:48

obviously he was on cocaine, but it's like,

7:50

so everybody just covered for him, I guess?

7:53

I feel like crazy about that too. And I

7:55

know with Bravo, it's like the line's always

7:57

moving about like what's acceptable and what's not. And

7:59

it's like, that's what I have a problem with. It's like, tell

8:02

us one minute. It's like, that's unacceptable behavior. You

8:04

got to get off the show. And the next minute

8:06

they're giving him a spinoff. And it's like, well,

8:08

you knew he was on Coke all that time. Everybody

8:10

saw it. And then you're like,

8:12

oh, let's hire him for the spinoff. Now,

8:14

is it good TV? Yes. It's good

8:16

TV. But it does make me

8:18

a little, I'm like just watching

8:20

them bewildered. I'm like, where is the line?

8:22

Nobody knows. We're all just guessing now. We're

8:24

all just, I guess, guessing. But

8:26

he gave Britney all that

8:29

shit about the drinking. Meanwhile, he's on

8:31

Coke. And then we find out this season,

8:33

he does this horrible thing because he

8:35

finds Britney had the iPad. She was sexy

8:37

videoing or sexy pics to somebody. Which

8:39

also we have to point out that Britney was like

8:41

doing that with the iPad that Cruz uses. I

8:44

don't mean to laugh. I'm laughing uncomfortably. But

8:47

the truth is, she was sending some

8:49

sexy videos to some guy. But still

8:51

I rise. And it turns

8:53

out she's like, oh, yeah, that was the iPad

8:55

that Cruz uses, and Jack's got a hold

8:57

of it. And I was like, well, why were

8:59

you sexing from Cruz's iPad? I don't

9:01

even think kids – I know your

9:04

parents out there, you get tired, you hand

9:06

the kid the iPad or the iPhone

9:08

or whatever. I think we need to be

9:10

careful with all of that in general.

9:12

But in particular, if you're sexing somebody, your

9:14

ex -husband's and the baby's – father's

9:17

friend. And maybe you

9:19

should just do it from another iPad. Like, can't

9:21

we get her another iPad and get him, the

9:23

Cruz, one of those like kid ones or something

9:25

like a leapfrog. Do they still make those? Get

9:27

him a leapfrog. I don't know. What does Cruz

9:29

need to be doing with the iPad that

9:32

you're sexting from? Or do it from your phone.

9:34

Sext from your phone. Is that really that

9:36

tough? I mean, the iPad is very clunky anyway.

9:38

I mean, who wants to be taken? Pictures

9:40

of your Rita Moreno with an iPad when you've

9:42

got an iPhone. It's much easier to maneuver

9:44

around. You can just use one hand. An iPad,

9:46

you've got to use two hands. It's

9:48

a lot of work and stuff. So I just wish our

9:50

Kentucky Muffin would have put some more thought into that. But

9:53

that's not the point. The point

9:55

is, Jack's got a

9:57

hold of that iPad, and then he got pissed, flipped

9:59

the table. And I'm concerned that if that's what

10:01

they're telling us on the show, I bet

10:03

it was worse than that. I bet it

10:05

was worse than that. You

10:07

know how that goes. Of course you're going to

10:09

cover for each. I

10:11

think everybody's covering. The

10:14

show maybe is covering a little bit. Jax

10:16

is probably covering a little bit. Brittany's probably

10:18

covering a little bit. And so it sounded

10:20

pretty bad to me. And then I'm thinking

10:22

in my head, well, if that's how bad

10:24

it sounds on TV, it's probably worse. And

10:27

then after this happens,

10:29

Jax decides to let Brittany go

10:32

with Cruz to go live in

10:34

some rental house. And I'm thinking,

10:36

like, why aren't you going to live in some

10:38

fucking rental house? Why is she? You're

10:40

the one who fucked up. So why

10:42

is she? It's like the most diabolical,

10:44

disgusting thing I can ever even think

10:46

about. You're making the mother of your

10:48

child and your child leave the home

10:50

that the child was growing up in. And

10:53

you're like, yeah, you go to the rental house. Come

10:55

on. It's the same thing that happened over

10:57

there with that demon Sandoval. But demon Sandoval at

10:59

least didn't have a child. And

11:01

so this is like so fucked up when

11:03

you think about Cruz having to go to

11:06

a rental to live with mom when instead

11:08

of just Jack's getting out of the house. And

11:10

I would also like to point out that,

11:12

look, we don't know everybody's finances. But

11:15

I would imagine, especially during this

11:17

off time, when they were off Vanderpump Rules, I

11:20

do believe in my heart. I don't know this

11:22

to be true. Everything I say on the podcast

11:24

is a legend. But I believe that Britney was

11:26

the breadwinner because she was the one getting the

11:28

Weight Watchers deal. And I may or may not

11:30

have heard that that was like a very, very

11:32

lucrative deal. Okay, let me just say that. And

11:34

I know Jack started the bar, but I think

11:36

they were like both

11:38

owners of it. And even so, I don't

11:40

think a bar, as we know from

11:43

Schwartz and Sandy, which closed down because it

11:45

was next to a pet shop and

11:47

they were giving out lobster corndogs. I think

11:49

that the bar situation is not really

11:51

bringing in that much money. But those sponsorships.

11:53

Bring in tons of money, especially one

11:55

as lucrative as Weight Watchers, which again, I've

11:57

heard things. I think it was like

12:00

very, very lucrative. And

12:02

so I just think

12:04

that she was probably the

12:06

bad breadwinner in that relationship for

12:08

a long time after Vanderpump Rules

12:10

had been canceled. That's my guess.

12:12

I don't know that to be true. So

12:15

I would imagine she also paid more for that house,

12:17

probably was paying more of the mortgage. The

12:19

other thing I want to point out with

12:21

those brand deals, and this has come up

12:23

on Summer House with Paige and Craig's situation,

12:25

the women on the network, they make a

12:27

lot more in brand deals than men. Not

12:29

only can you see how many more brand

12:31

deals that they do, but they also just

12:33

are bringing in bigger brand deals and

12:35

they're making much more from them

12:37

because... they're going to be

12:40

able to move merch much easier than Jax is

12:42

going to be able to move merch, right? So

12:44

if you hire Paige to do Tresemme, you're going

12:46

to get a much bigger return on investment than

12:48

hiring that demon Jax to do a Tresemme ad.

12:50

Do you get what I'm saying? So

12:52

they're making way more, way bigger brands.

12:54

They're doing a lot more of

12:56

them. And just even if it was

12:58

the same brand, even if they're

13:00

both doing Colgate or something. The

13:02

woman is going to usually make more because

13:04

it's usually women in the household are the

13:06

ones buying the stuff. And so the

13:08

ad dollars and the marketing dollars tend to

13:10

go towards the women who are promoting

13:12

it way more than the men. And

13:15

so I think Jax should have been the one

13:17

to get out of the house and get

13:19

in a rental over Britney. Like in what world

13:21

is the mom of your child who's probably

13:23

making more? She's going to

13:26

live in a rental while you're taking

13:28

over the house. And it's like crazy

13:30

to me. And with a child and

13:32

Cruz, I mean, justice for

13:34

Cruz. Justice for Cruz. I mean,

13:36

I'm just hoping for the best for

13:38

that young child

13:40

because he should not have to be going

13:42

and living in different homes and stuff. I'm worried

13:44

about it. And he just seems

13:46

like, Jax just seems, I know Brittany's got her

13:48

flaws. She's got her flaws. Like, yes, she

13:51

was sexing someone from an iPad and it was

13:53

the ex -husband's friend. Yes, that's

13:55

not right. I get that. Did

13:57

Britney maybe move to this state

13:59

in order to be on television and she knew

14:01

what she was getting into with that man,

14:03

Jax? Of course. Of course. Yes.

14:06

Do we think she's innocent and everything?

14:08

Of course not. But I will be backing my

14:10

Kentucky muffin because I do not think that

14:12

demon should have anything to do with that home.

14:14

And I don't think anything that Britney has

14:16

ever done is going to be as bad as

14:18

anything that Jax has done to her. And

14:20

we've seen him cheat all the time. Remember, he

14:22

was hooking up with the faith with the old

14:25

lady in the bed or something. I

14:27

mean, we all watch that. We watch that.

14:29

And the things that that man has put

14:31

Britney through, and that's not to say that

14:33

Britney didn't get into the relationship understanding

14:35

who this person is. I mean, you can't

14:37

just move across the country and date the

14:39

first person you see on television because these

14:41

are the types of consequences that it

14:43

has. And so that's actually a good lesson

14:45

to us all. If you're watching TV and

14:47

you think, oh, there's someone on reality

14:49

TV, like maybe I should move across the

14:51

country, try to be in a relationship

14:53

with them, and then... on TV myself,

14:56

maybe just rethink that situation

14:58

and think, oh, what would Britney do?

15:00

And then do the opposite of it, because

15:02

it's not a good situation. But

15:04

I am rooting for Britney, and we want the best

15:06

for her, and I will not support that other

15:08

demon, because I do not care for the way that he

15:10

just kicked her out of the house, kicked her to the

15:12

curb. I don't think he's a

15:14

good human being. And

15:16

look, I guess we're going to find out

15:18

more, but I don't like that. I don't like it. I

15:20

also don't like how I felt like there were sort

15:22

of... He's trying

15:24

to get ahead of all this stuff that's going

15:26

on the show. So he's been doing all

15:28

these interviews about how he had to go to rehab and

15:30

now he's a better person. He's a work in progress. Let

15:33

me tell you something. I'm not falling for that work

15:35

in progress bit anymore because I've been seeing no

15:37

progress on any of the work in all these years

15:39

that I've been watching that man on TV. Not

15:41

one bit of progress. Where's the progress? If

15:44

he had on the screen, they should put a progress bar

15:46

on there, like a little graphic. You know how

15:48

they do that? A little graphic of a progress bar. I

15:50

would like to see that because There's

15:53

been no progress in all these years. He's

15:55

been telling Andy Cohen at every reunion, I'm

15:57

a work in progress, I'm a work in progress.

15:59

We'll start progressing that work a little

16:02

faster, because in how many years

16:04

are we going to see no progress?

16:06

So let's put the graphic on

16:08

the screen, because until I see a

16:10

little graphic go up, I'm

16:12

not to believe there's any progress. Start

16:14

progressing a little faster on that work,

16:16

sir. Anyway, I

16:18

did go. Did I tell you I went

16:20

to that Jax's bar? I went there. I

16:22

went to my friend Felicia's birthday recently. It

16:24

was my first time there, and I honestly

16:26

kind of liked it. I did actually like

16:28

it. I did. Although I tried the beer

16:30

cheese, and it wasn't for me. I mean,

16:32

it was like I didn't understand the consistency,

16:34

the temperature, the look. Really anything about it,

16:37

I didn't understand. And I'm from Ohio. I've

16:39

eaten all sorts of different cheeses. I mean,

16:41

not real cheeses either. I'm talking

16:43

about, like, I've had canned cheeses that I

16:45

love. An easy cheese. Woo! I

16:47

love that. A cheese whiz. Fine with me. Dip

16:49

a soft pretzel in it. But in terms

16:51

of the cheese at Jax's, the Mamaw's beer cheese,

16:54

they might need to go back to the

16:56

drawing board with that one. Although the pretzel

16:58

that came with it was delicious. The pretzel

17:00

that they heated up in a toaster oven

17:02

was actually really good. But

17:04

I love the, I sort of love the atmosphere

17:06

because it was sort of dive bar -y. And I

17:08

don't know, I felt really, it felt really right. I

17:10

like Jax's bar. If you get a chance, although

17:12

we don't want to, I don't know if we support

17:14

that. Does Brittany still get income

17:16

on that? I don't know. I don't know. But

17:19

really all of these, I feel bad

17:22

for the people who have kind of hitched

17:24

their wagon to these men on the

17:26

Bravo Network to open restaurants and bars and

17:28

name them after these demons, because it

17:30

seems to me like it wasn't a really

17:32

good idea to name a place Jax's

17:34

after watching him on TV all those years and seeing

17:36

all the demonic behavior that he did and then

17:38

continues to do. So it seems like maybe, again,

17:40

I don't mean to always give out business advice

17:42

on this podcast, but if I

17:44

was an investor or if I was a partner

17:47

or if I was... I know he didn't open

17:49

himself. I think he's got business people that help.

17:51

And so I would just recommend any business people

17:54

out there. If one of these reality TV stars

17:56

comes to you and say, hey, I want to

17:58

open up a place, then maybe you say, okay,

18:00

we need a name that's not your name.

18:02

Do you know what I'm saying? Like something about

18:04

her, the sandwich place. Katie Maloney

18:06

could, I don't know, fuck someone up

18:08

in a second, and at least we

18:10

won't associate that place with her name.

18:12

Do you see what I'm saying? Like Jax's

18:14

is the name of the restaurant. Like you couldn't

18:16

have thought of any other name. You couldn't

18:19

have literally any other word. Just pick out

18:21

any word, any other word. Just look

18:23

at something and say lamp. Let's call it

18:25

lamp, lamp bar, right? Let's

18:27

call it, I don't know, smart water bar,

18:29

anything, literally any, that might've been a

18:31

trademark issue, but you see what I'm,

18:34

you see what I mean. Just literally name

18:36

it anything else or after Britney, if

18:38

they were part owners, why didn't

18:40

we name it after Britney? I think I read that

18:42

she was trying to open up a bar, and then

18:44

that fell through. She was going to name it Britney's.

18:46

But maybe just don't name it after yourself. In what

18:48

world do we need to name it after you? Why

18:50

don't they just call it, like, we're

18:52

on the Valley Bar? Is that maybe

18:54

a Bravo issue? Like, you

18:57

could still relate it somehow

18:59

to Bravo, or one of your

19:01

taglines, because it could have been called number one

19:03

bar in the group, right? That would

19:05

have been better than your name. Because

19:07

at this point, I don't want to go

19:09

to a place that's called Jax's. Even if

19:11

I do like the atmosphere. It's like, why

19:13

did they name it that? How fucking stupid

19:15

do you have to be? I mean,

19:17

do I have to tell everyone

19:19

everything? Ugh. Okay.

19:23

I need to cool it. I need

19:25

to calm down a little. We did

19:27

open this episode seven days before Jax

19:29

goes to the treatment center. And

19:32

I'm happy he went. But

19:34

it doesn't seem like it

19:36

worked. And even I keep seeing

19:38

Britney on these interviews and she's like sort

19:40

of eluding the fact that he's not sober.

19:42

And I don't know what's the truth, but

19:44

she keeps saying like, oh, he hasn't gotten

19:46

any better. And he's still awful to deal

19:48

with. And so what's that about? What's

19:51

that about, Jax? Get it together. We're tired of

19:53

you saying you're a work in progress. Just

19:55

get it together. Just get it together. Okay,

19:59

you know who did, I think, kind of get it together?

20:01

I'm going to regret this. I'm going to

20:04

regret saying this. First of all,

20:06

pull over if you're driving, and then also forget what

20:08

I'm about to say. Don't

20:10

ever repeat what I'm about to say.

20:12

Don't you ever repeat what I'm about to say. I

20:16

kind of like Jesse. I

20:19

kind of like Jesse Lally. I don't know.

20:21

I know I regret that. And I

20:23

don't know why Michelle moved out. Why did Michelle

20:25

move out? Why didn't he move out? Why is it?

20:28

The co -parenting is not going well. And

20:31

Isabella, the daughter. is

20:33

like him, he says. But

20:35

there is something I find...

20:37

I don't know. I feel like

20:39

Jesse, to me, is like an upfront

20:41

about... He's upfront about his villainy. So

20:43

even though he is sort of that

20:46

Patrick Bateman or whatever, I

20:48

kind of feel like he

20:50

is at least upfront about it. At least I'm

20:52

getting an honest version of a human. And

20:54

so with Jax or some of these other people,

20:56

I feel like they're presenting as differently. And

20:59

Jesse's just kind of like an

21:01

evil... He reminds me of like

21:03

a diabolical. Maybe because he's

21:05

like a smart villain or something. I

21:07

don't know. Jax makes me nervous too because

21:09

I don't understand how his brain works. And

21:13

it makes me uneasy. It

21:15

just does. It just does. I'm like,

21:17

I don't know what he will say or

21:19

do. And it makes me uneasy. But

21:22

anyway, Michelle and Jesse, their co -parenting is

21:24

not going well. Michelle's

21:26

pissed because Jesse gave the daughter

21:28

eye shadow. And, you know,

21:30

so they're just, they're kind of sticking it

21:32

to each other. I don't think either one

21:34

of them likes each other. And it's actually

21:36

shocking to me that they got married and also

21:38

had a child. But I suppose we've been

21:40

watching all sorts of these people for so

21:42

long and thinking the same thing, you know,

21:44

with Jax and Brittany or Tom and Ariana

21:46

or any of them. Any of them, you're

21:49

like, well, wait, how did you two get

21:51

together? And now I guess that's the whole point

21:53

of the show. You know what the Valley, I had watched

21:55

the Valley back to back with Summer House. And

21:57

The Summer House, it felt really bleak to

21:59

me on Summer House because I felt

22:02

really old watching it, especially some of

22:04

the Jesse and Lexi stuff, or even

22:06

when Kyle was getting so wasted and

22:08

coming home at like 5 a .m. or

22:10

something, even though he's older than me

22:12

and should not be doing that, I

22:14

still feel, I felt like an uneasiness

22:16

and so old watching Summer House. And

22:18

The Valley is kind of just as

22:20

messy. And yet, I don't

22:23

feel as old, because I guess

22:25

it's more family stuff. I don't

22:27

know. It's all a mess. Every

22:29

human on this network is a

22:31

mess. The human world, it's a

22:33

mess, girl. I

22:37

mean, the human world, especially the world

22:39

of the Valley, they're all a mess. And

22:41

that's why it's so good. And look, it

22:44

is kind of sick. It is sort of

22:46

sick. And I'm judging myself, and I'm

22:48

judging every one of you who's listening to

22:50

podcasts about it. But we're all kind

22:52

of sick for getting entertainment out of this,

22:54

out of these people's lives really essentially

22:56

falling apart in front of our very eyes.

22:59

And the truth is, there's a lot going

23:01

on in the world, and we all need a

23:03

break and escape. And so if that escape has

23:05

to come vis -a -vis these people blowing up their

23:07

lives, and so be it. Because we're

23:09

in dark times. And so

23:11

we don't have... All bets are

23:13

off. All rules... Remember, what

23:15

was that Scream 3 tagline? In

23:22

the first one, it's like the rules.

23:24

Second one, they break the rules. In

23:26

part three, there are no rules. Does

23:28

anyone remember the Scream 3 marketing? Anybody?

23:30

I don't know. Maybe there's a gay out there

23:33

who remembers, but the Scream 3 marketing. Scream

23:35

3 with Neb Campbell. He said in the

23:37

third one, all bets are off. There are

23:40

no rules. And that's how I feel. We're

23:42

in the part three of society these days.

23:44

And so there are no rules anymore, it

23:46

seems. It's not for us. It's not for

23:48

anybody. Unfortunately,

23:50

that is the case. If that's going to be

23:52

the case, then I'm going to have to enjoy the

23:54

entertainment of all these people being a mess on

23:56

my screen. Speaking of mess on my

23:58

screen, did you guys see, and just like that, you know,

24:00

season three is coming back. That's

24:04

right. Carrie and the gang are

24:06

coming back. Jay Diaz is out, and

24:08

they're coming back for a season

24:10

three event just like that. Woo! That

24:13

show. I'm going to need that. I'm to need

24:15

that when I'm on paternity leave. watching

24:19

with my new baby. Ooh, I

24:21

can't wait. Anyway, let's

24:23

see here. Where were we at here?

24:25

Janet and Jason got the baby. We're

24:27

seeing their baby Cameron crawling. Then

24:30

we see Kristen's making fun of it. Kristen

24:32

and Janet hate each other. Kristen says

24:34

Janet's dead to her. know, I

24:36

did meet Luke for the first time when

24:38

I filmed this promo for the Valley,

24:40

and I liked him a lot. I really liked

24:42

him. I was surprised because he seemed like a

24:44

very nice young gentleman, just very sweet, very

24:46

normal to me. And I don't know, I'm going

24:48

to regret that too probably one day. But

24:51

the truth is, I was talking to him, and

24:53

I'm like, he seems like a nice, stable,

24:55

normal human being. And I tend

24:57

to think, I don't know,

24:59

I feel like he's good for Kristen. Because

25:01

I think got to

25:03

balance each other out. But he

25:05

seemed nice to me, at least, in the

25:07

very brief time I spent with him. And I

25:09

also spent a little time with Jasmine, who

25:11

I'm excited to get to know her and Melissa's

25:13

situation. Because we love a queer couple on

25:15

TV, and she seems sweet. Melissa's in tech. And

25:18

I'm a little concerned for Jasmine and Luke

25:21

because they both seem like normal human beings

25:23

to me. And that scares

25:25

me when they're in this kind of environment

25:27

because I'm like, uh -oh, what's going to happen

25:29

to you guys? I'm not worried about them

25:31

going nuts. I'm just worried about them being

25:33

in such an unstable environment. Do you get

25:35

what I mean? It's scary.

25:37

It's scary. I mean, this show

25:39

is a mess. And so I'm like, uh -oh,

25:41

Jasmine, get out now because these people, we

25:43

nose -tell them what they're going to do or

25:45

say or what's going to happen. And Luke too.

25:49

Anyway, I'm excited to get to know

25:51

Jasmine and Melissa as a couple. That'll be

25:53

exciting. Then we

25:55

have Jax is at the house

25:57

and Jesse arrives. And we learn that Jax

25:59

and Brittany have been separated for nine months. And so

26:01

she's been in a nine, has she

26:03

been in the rental for nine months? I

26:05

don't know, but they're both dating. And

26:07

the other issue is like, Jax

26:09

keeps saying that Brittany's like texting to

26:11

work on the marriage and he... like that

26:13

they almost hooked up a couple of times.

26:15

And I don't remember if I've been hearing

26:17

this in interviews or if it happened on

26:19

the show, but I feel like he keeps

26:21

saying that she keeps almost, they almost hook

26:23

up or they see each other and she's

26:25

texting to get back together and stuff. I'm

26:27

like, Brittany, you need to run. You got

26:29

to get out of there. But

26:32

Brittany does reveal that in the

26:34

iPad that Cruz uses, Brittany sent the

26:36

sexy video and she's like, Jack saw

26:38

it. She says, Saul, she saw it. I

26:43

miss Britney. I'm engaged. Date

26:46

night. Right and help.

26:51

And then she reveals that they were still doing

26:53

a podcast together, which I don't know if

26:55

you know this, but I think every person on

26:57

this show has a podcast now. I think

26:59

every single cast member has a podcast. And I

27:01

know the podcast industrial complex is pretty vast at

27:03

the moment, but maybe we need to scale

27:06

back a little bit or maybe some more

27:08

of them can pair up and just combine

27:10

them. And I hate to even say that

27:12

because... want to encourage everyone to do a

27:14

podcast because when I was starting my podcast,

27:16

people were saying, oh, it's so stupid. It's

27:18

so lame or whatever. And if I would

27:20

have listened to all those people, we wouldn't

27:23

have this everything iconic at this moment. And

27:25

so I don't want to discourage anybody. If

27:27

anything, I want to encourage them scaling back

27:29

for the sake of this show. Because when

27:31

all of these shows have a million podcasts

27:33

from cast members, it becomes A, too much

27:35

to keep up with. B, we're

27:38

getting too many storylines that are like

27:40

about the podcast. And that hasn't happened here

27:42

on the Valley yet. But it happens

27:44

on some of the other shows where the

27:46

storylines become about these podcasts. And it's

27:48

boring to follow. It's annoying to follow. I

27:50

feel like it just turns off a

27:52

large section of the audience that doesn't want

27:54

to follow podcasts in that way. And

27:57

so I would encourage them all

27:59

to maybe like, I don't know,

28:01

Bravo maybe needs to step in at

28:03

a certain point. And again, we like podcasts.

28:06

I don't want to hurt anyone's paycheck. I

28:08

just, maybe they, I don't know. Just be

28:10

careful with the Valley. Just be careful is

28:12

what I'm saying. And maybe they could put

28:14

it in some contracts or something, especially on the housewives.

28:17

I think we need to do that. On the housewives, it's

28:19

like, we need to do that. I

28:21

don't know how, but maybe we need to figure it

28:23

out. It's not up to me to figure it

28:25

out, but it's up to somebody else who gets a

28:27

higher paycheck from the network to figure that out.

28:30

I'm not getting any paycheck from the network. Which is

28:32

why I'm about to drag it. Okay, now they're

28:34

doing the pod together, though, which is like, why are

28:36

they doing this podcast together? And

28:38

Brittany says the whole thing

28:40

about the flipped coffee table. And

28:43

I, again, get, I understand Jack's being upset that

28:45

she hooked up with a friend and then

28:47

put it on the iPad that Cruise uses. Of

28:49

course, that would elicit an argument from just

28:51

about anyone, right? If I found

28:54

out Matt was sending sexy videos from

28:56

an iPad that my son was

28:58

watching to, using to watch Bluey. or

29:01

my daughter was watching Miss

29:03

Rachel on, I'd be fucking

29:05

pissed too. You know, but I don't

29:07

think that's something to be so pissed about that

29:09

you're flipping coffee tables, hitting someone with the knee and

29:11

the kid in the house. Jack said

29:13

he just went unhinged. And

29:15

it's like, he said, I saw a red.

29:17

He's like, show me a guy who wouldn't

29:20

handle a situation like I handled it. Excuse

29:23

me, sir. Maybe just don't

29:25

throw a table. I'm not even saying that

29:27

you can't raise your voice a little bit. I would.

29:29

If he said, oh, I raised my voice or we got

29:31

in a big fight or something, I'd say, yeah, okay,

29:33

I get that. You might say

29:35

words or whatever that you wish

29:37

you could take back. But

29:40

not when we're throwing shit. And

29:42

then to find out you're all on cocoa

29:44

that whole time, I can only imagine the

29:46

kind of chaos in that household. And

29:48

I don't appreciate that for Cruz. And so

29:50

I'm not okay with that. And so

29:52

you don't just say, oh, show me a

29:54

guy who wouldn't handle it like that.

29:56

Like the audacity. Just maybe

29:58

handle it any other way. Literally any

30:00

other way. You mean to tell me every

30:03

man out there can't control their emotions? Well,

30:06

maybe that's true, unfortunately. And

30:08

you know what? I'm actually sick of that

30:10

fucking narrative that the women in general can't

30:12

control their emotions when we see time and

30:14

time again that it's obviously men that can't

30:16

control their emotions. So maybe we

30:18

all need to change that fucking narrative

30:20

because how many times you been watching this network

30:22

and it's not the women who can't control their

30:25

emotions, it's the men who can't control their emotions.

30:27

So maybe you need to get in therapy

30:29

and fucking figure it out. Okay,

30:33

obviously my emotions are off the handle too because

30:35

I'm just getting too into this. I'm sorry. Probably

30:37

sounds like I'm on a Coke. I promise I'm

30:39

not. I've

30:42

never done it. There was one time I

30:44

think like maybe I did it, but I was

30:46

like drinking a lot and I'm not even

30:48

sure, to be honest with you. This is me

30:50

being completely honest and I probably shouldn't even

30:52

share this information on a public forum, but I'm

30:54

crazy enough with a fucking Diet Coke.

30:57

I can't handle anything more

30:59

than that. But yeah, so there

31:01

was one time in my life, in my 20s, which

31:03

I don't even know that it happened. It probably

31:05

didn't, to be honest with you. But it was just

31:07

like one time, like I woke up a couple

31:09

days later and I was like, did that happen? You

31:12

know, and I don't think it did. But

31:14

in my head, I like, there's still like

31:16

maybe a 2 % chance that it.

31:18

It might have happened, which is nothing wrong. I

31:20

mean, we do shit in your 20s. That's

31:22

the time to explore. But Jax is

31:24

in his 40s. He's 45 now. Maybe scale

31:26

back on the Coke. So switch

31:29

to Diet Coke. See, that's the

31:31

lesson here. Diet Coke

31:33

is going to give you a little buzz anyway. And to

31:35

me, it's a better buzz because you're at least kind

31:37

of in control a little bit. You get

31:39

the energy up. You don't need.

31:41

So that's a lesson to it all. Get

31:43

away from the drug, Coke. Especially

31:46

now you don't know what people are putting in that shit. I

31:48

don't know if there's any young kids now

31:50

listening to this, but any of the youths out there,

31:52

you got to be careful. I watched The Pit. I watched The

31:54

Pit. Do you watch The Pit? I'm obsessed

31:56

with The Pit. The Pit. I think about it

31:58

all. It's out of my brain all the time. It's

32:00

just Noah Wiley on HBO. I'm

32:04

only six episodes in or seven episodes in,

32:06

but it's about this emergency room

32:08

in Pittsburgh. Oh, I fucking love it. It's

32:11

very stressful. It's very stressful. A

32:13

lot going on. It's just a lot

32:16

of like medical cases, but you learn

32:18

stuff and they're putting all sorts of drugs

32:20

and all sorts of different drugs. And so you

32:22

got to be careful out there, kids. Watch

32:24

the pit and maybe get scared straight because you

32:26

watch Noah Wiley, you know, think, oh, I

32:28

probably shouldn't have that thing at the party because

32:30

there might be fentanyl in it. Probably

32:32

shouldn't have Coke. There might be fentanyl in it. You just

32:34

don't know. Okay,

32:37

let's take a break here. Let's

32:39

take a break. We're going to come right back. Find

32:42

me on social media at Danny Pellecrino. And

32:44

thank you again, my books, for making the books

32:46

number one on Amazon again. It means the

32:48

world with that sale. I couldn't believe

32:50

it. I couldn't believe it. So thank you, and we'll

32:52

be right back. And

33:00

we're back. See,

33:06

there's just so much to talk about. There's

33:08

so many things to talk about.

33:10

Now, Michelle thinks Jesse's having a midlife

33:12

crisis at 44. And Jesse says

33:14

he's a relationship guy. He said he

33:16

tried dating around. It didn't work. Or

33:20

he tried fucking around. It didn't work. He wanted

33:22

to be in a relationship. So he started

33:24

dating somebody. Michelle's also dating a guy named Aaron.

33:26

It does feel like they both jumped into

33:28

relationships pretty quickly. And that concerns me. It's like

33:30

maybe way to beat. But you

33:33

can't control who you meet. I would

33:35

just encourage anyone that's on the

33:37

Bravo network in particular. It seems like...

33:39

everybody on the Bravo Network should take a beat

33:41

before they jump into a new relationship because

33:43

then we see how it goes. And

33:45

so I'm not saying I could predict the future. I'm

33:48

just saying I've seen this so many

33:50

times play out in the same

33:52

way that it would be crazy of me to

33:54

think that these relationships will work out. So

33:56

I want you all to be sure. I want

33:58

you to be sure. It

34:00

was also, did you guys see, remember last year

34:02

there was these rumors about her flirting with

34:04

the director or something? And now come to find

34:06

out. I think it was revealed somewhere. I

34:08

don't know where it was revealed. I hope I'm

34:10

not. I think it was Quentin Tarantino. I

34:14

think it was. Did I write

34:16

that down wrong? Maybe look that up. Maybe

34:20

don't share that, because now that I'm

34:22

saying that, I'm like, wait, was that the

34:24

director? I think it was. But just

34:26

look it up first, because I don't want

34:28

to be the one to spread false

34:30

information. But maybe it was.

34:32

I don't know. Then we have Jana and

34:34

Brittany going to the plant shop. Now,

34:36

Brittany's horny for the guy at the

34:38

plant shop. She's like, you single? Yeah. I

34:44

love Brittany's laugh. I

34:48

know the past couple of weeks on

34:50

this podcast, I've been talking about a goofy

34:52

movie and then go from like all

34:54

that goofy movie content. Cause it's like the

34:56

30th anniversary of goofy movie to go

34:58

from like ingesting so much goofy content to

35:00

all of a sudden seeing Brittany back

35:03

on the Valley. It's like, Oh my gosh,

35:05

where does one end and the other

35:07

begin? Like, I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

35:09

Because Brittany's always saying like, are you

35:11

single? I want a date. I love her.

35:13

I love her. And to be honest, like there's no

35:15

better person to emulate. So good for her. She

35:18

should own that. She should

35:20

own that because Goofy's actually a

35:22

gentleman and a good dad. And

35:25

so, honestly, that's the kind of man. To be

35:27

honest, if Goofy was like a human, if there

35:29

was a human version like in the Goofy movie,

35:31

I actually think that'd be the perfect man for

35:33

Britney. Even

35:35

a single dad, even a single

35:37

dad like Goofy, I think they would

35:39

get along really well. I think

35:41

that would actually be the perfect pairing.

35:44

Because they... I think he's

35:46

really nice. He's a good dad.

35:49

And he's single. And

35:51

I think personality -wise would match up

35:53

with Britney. I think they'd have a

35:55

lot to talk about. They'd hyuck -yuck

35:57

together quite a bit. And so

35:59

maybe that's the route to go. And so if

36:01

anyone out there, if you know someone who's

36:03

a human version of Goofy from Disney, I

36:06

think maybe call up Brit and

36:08

say, hey, Brit Bananas, we

36:10

need you to meet this fella.

36:15

Yeah, that's who she needs to be

36:17

with. Actually, I'm spot on. Anyway, Brittany

36:19

and Janet are at the terrarium. And

36:22

Jax keeps calling the phone. And Janet

36:24

says she just wants Brittany to have fun this

36:26

summer. So Brittany's going to have a white

36:28

party. And she says Jax is throwing his own

36:30

party. And she's like, why can't I just

36:32

have one night? She says night with like a

36:34

thousand syllables. Like, one night. Date night.

36:37

I just

36:39

want one night. Can

36:41

you just give me a date night?

36:43

I just want a night. Give

36:46

me a now. I can't be

36:48

here, though. I have an only one now. I

36:51

just want to have my white party now. Oh,

36:57

I love these shows. Britt,

37:01

though, in her confessional, she's

37:03

like, Jax is 45. He is

37:05

45. And she says it

37:07

with such conviction. She was really

37:09

convicted to sing. He's 45. I

37:11

just want my one now. Just

37:13

give me that one now for my, I want

37:15

a date now, and I want a white party

37:17

now. Give

37:20

me that now. Anyway, then

37:22

we have Nia and Zach. There's

37:24

a new weave on Zach. He

37:28

looks good. He looks good. I

37:31

was happy with Zach. I want to know who stepped

37:33

in because he's got a different hair color, it seems.

37:35

I don't even know what the fuck they were talking about

37:37

in this scene, because I was just looking at his

37:39

hair. And I got pissed at Janet, too, actually, later in

37:41

the episode. She's like, oh, he's still got that Lego

37:43

head. And I was thinking, you know what? Actually, Zack stepped

37:45

it up, and he looks good. And so we've got

37:47

to give him that. And so I will

37:49

not stand for the Zack hair slander

37:51

anymore, because he seemed to get that

37:53

hair fixed. And I don't know what's

37:56

happening up there, but somebody stepped in,

37:58

and he's got a good style of

38:00

head of hair now. He's got a good color to

38:02

that head of hair now. And so I'm

38:04

proud of him. And I'm proud

38:06

of him. And look, he's

38:08

a good looking fella. And so we can't just complain

38:10

about his hair when he got that hair. Now this

38:12

hair looks great. So we got to find something else

38:14

to talk about if you want to talk about him.

38:16

Because I am looking at that head of hair and

38:18

it looks fine to me. And it looks great even.

38:21

And so, you know, justice for Zach's head

38:23

of hair. Justice for that hair. And

38:25

Nia, though, I mean, who would want to be in

38:27

a scene with Nia? I mean, she's the most stunning

38:29

person. I wouldn't even want to be next to her.

38:31

She's kind of got that shaky Raquel voice from... you

38:34

know, that I'm very drawn to. That's my truth.

38:36

I'm very drawn to that. I don't know if

38:38

it's because, I think maybe when

38:40

I, maybe when I was a kid, I

38:42

had a little bit of that like shaky, nervous

38:44

voice or something. But when I heard it

38:46

on Raquel over there on Vanderpump Rules, and now

38:48

I'm hearing on Nia, I

38:51

don't know. There's something I'm

38:53

very drawn to that

38:55

voice when she's talking. She's

38:57

like, it's a little bit of the

38:59

RFK voice, which we do not like it

39:01

on. that other one. But

39:03

I like it when women have that kind of voice.

39:05

I don't know. I'm like very drawn to it. Maybe

39:07

because I'm on the edge of my seat and I

39:09

like a thriller. It's like, I don't know what they're

39:11

going to say next or how the sounds are going

39:13

to come out. That's probably why I like Britney too.

39:15

It's like, I don't know what I'm going to hear,

39:18

how I'm going to hear it. So words, it's going

39:20

to be a surprise. Every time a word comes out

39:22

of their chompers, it's like, oh, how are you saying

39:24

that? You know, and I like that. I'm into that.

39:26

And then Kristen shows up. She's

39:29

pissed. She says, hey, she's,

39:31

mad at Janet because she found out her

39:33

friend went to Pilates with Janet the other day,

39:35

and Janet said that her and Kristen were going

39:37

to be friends again or something. Now,

39:40

I do think that one day Kristen could, her

39:43

and, between Jax and

39:45

Janet, like Kristen hates them both,

39:47

like with the passion, with the kind

39:49

of passion that you don't see

39:51

very often on television. And

39:53

so, just wanted to keep

39:55

eyes and ears on that, but she definitely

39:57

hates them both. Now, Her and Zach

39:59

talk about last season they had this whole

40:02

thing about Janet was pregnant and Zach

40:04

apologized about the pregnancy comments last year

40:06

because Janet was pissed because she said

40:08

Zach said he didn't want her pregnancy

40:10

to go full term, which is disgusting.

40:12

And here's the thing. I told you

40:14

all I'm going to be back in

40:16

Kristen this season and every step of

40:18

the way because in real time she's

40:20

pregnant. She's having a baby same time

40:22

as us. And so get behind me.

40:24

Because I am defending her to the

40:26

end. Gotta help. And I felt that

40:28

way about Janet last season. I think

40:31

I was the only one, but people

40:33

hated Janet last season. Did they not?

40:35

I mean, what was that about? And

40:37

I felt like I was the only

40:39

one who's giving her some grace because

40:41

she's preggers. And so I'm giving Kristen

40:43

more grace than ever before. She's pregnant. And

40:46

around all these people. The human world,

40:48

it's a mess. Girl? Like, they're all

40:50

a mess. And so she's around all

40:52

these messy people. And so we got

40:54

to stick behind Kristen. So get behind

40:56

me, Kristen. I'm defending you this season

40:58

till the end. I don't care what,

41:00

I don't know what she's up to

41:03

this season and what's going to happen. But

41:05

I don't care. I'm going to

41:07

have to defend her. I think I'm going to

41:09

just have to defend her blindly, no matter what,

41:11

because she's preggers. And we have to support them.

41:14

We just do. We just do. And

41:16

then, let's see, Janet,

41:18

though, I didn't really

41:20

understand the, I guess Zach

41:22

apologized. I don't know. I

41:24

was so focused on Zach's new hair. It fits

41:26

him. It's a different color. It fits him. I'm

41:28

a little concerned. He's kind of got the Britney

41:30

brows in the confessional. And I know they're good

41:32

friends. I feel like they went to the Botox

41:34

guy. I don't know who their Botox fella is

41:36

or who's doing it in the back of the garage

41:38

because it seems like they're giving a little too

41:40

much in the brow area. And I don't know. I'm

41:42

no beauty expert. I don't know. But maybe it seems

41:44

to me that it's right

41:46

in the wrong spot in the brow.

41:49

I shouldn't judge looks because, again, they're

41:51

both stunning. And they're both good looking.

41:53

So you know what? Maybe it's working

41:55

for them. It just maybe seems like

41:57

they're always surprised. And it

41:59

feels very like triangular. But

42:02

you know what? Good for them. Maybe that's the

42:04

style too. Sometimes a few weeks ago on the

42:06

show, I was talking about Lexi on Summer House. And

42:09

she's a very aggressive lip liner.

42:11

Very aggressive lip liner on the

42:13

whole family. But

42:15

I think it's sort of a trend now.

42:17

And so it's like, maybe I'm just not

42:19

in the trends. And so I'm like, I

42:21

got to go to the beauty shop. I'm

42:23

heading up to CVS after this podcast episode

42:26

to find some lip liner, you know, call

42:28

up Sephora and tell him I'm coming, baby.

42:30

Because whoever that fella is doing Botox out

42:32

of his garage, I'm going to him for

42:34

some toxin my brows. And then I'm going

42:36

to get some lip liner because I guess

42:38

that's what's on trend. And so maybe it's

42:40

me. This is a me issue. Anyway,

42:43

Zach also says. Yeah, I

42:45

don't know. I guess I can't even

42:47

read my notes. Sometimes my notes just says,

42:49

Zach says, Janet doesn't suck D. But

42:53

still I rise. Sometimes

42:56

I can't even understand these notes. And I

42:58

have like 100 pages this week because I'm

43:00

trying to catch up. And even Beverly Hills

43:02

was ending, which I don't even know if

43:04

we're going to talk about it because that

43:07

flop show, I'm over it. But yeah, I'm

43:09

trying to keep up with all this stuff. And so I got a

43:11

lot of... A lot of

43:13

things. Then we see Danny and Nia at

43:15

lunch. Okay, we said Danny reminds me of Tim

43:17

Allen robot and Santa Claus too. I wrote

43:19

that in my notes. Just very glassy and robotic.

43:22

And he wants to move to Santa Clarita. He

43:24

wants some new space. Get on over to Santa Clarita.

43:26

And she says she wants other babies. She wants

43:28

it to happen quick. And

43:30

so she can get the body. She's

43:32

like, I want control of my body. And

43:34

so I get that, but I just can't even

43:36

imagine. I can't even imagine. Now

43:38

for Britney's white party now. She

43:41

is getting everybody together. Jax is going

43:43

to be at his bar, but everybody else

43:45

is going to this thing. And they do a

43:47

pre -party at Janet and Jason's with Danny and

43:49

Nia. And I was very

43:51

focused because Danny, or I'm sorry,

43:53

Janet and Jason, they had the baby Brezza. You

43:56

know, I'm very into the baby stuff right now.

43:58

So I'm like noticing. That's the sick

44:00

part about now that we're expecting a child.

44:02

I feel like I'm looking at everybody. I'm noticing

44:04

the brands of strollers they got. I'm like,

44:06

oh, that person's got a Nuna. That person's got

44:08

a Chico. I know everything about

44:11

every brand. And so even in this scene,

44:13

I was just noticing how they had a

44:15

baby Brezza in the background. They were talking

44:17

about probably something serious, like domestic abuse or

44:19

whatever's happened on that show. And then I'm

44:21

just like, oh, look, they have the bottle

44:23

maker. I'm

44:26

like, oh, that looks so nice, the baby Brezza. So

44:28

that's what I'm focusing on. So I might have

44:31

missed if they were talking about, I don't know,

44:33

Kristen and... not wanting Janet to go full term,

44:35

but I was just focused on the baby merch.

44:37

And then even Janet earlier in the episode, she

44:39

said something about the snot sucker. And

44:41

I keep saying that, you know, I'm on the baby

44:43

list. I love baby list, but I'm on that website

44:45

like every five minutes. And some of the

44:47

items I'm like, I don't know if I need this.

44:49

And so you see something like a baby, not a

44:51

snot sucker. And then I'm spending like two hours looking

44:53

up. I'm like, do I need that? Am I

44:55

going to need the snot sucker? And so Janet was

44:57

talking about, I'm like, oh my God, I feel like.

44:59

That's why I'm liking the show too, because I feel

45:01

like maybe I relate to them or something now. But

45:04

the snot sucker is

45:06

like a thing. And they have electric ones, but when Janet

45:08

was saying she accidentally used that one, I'm like, oh,

45:10

maybe I need the electric one now, because I don't know

45:12

if I want to suck up some snot. I know

45:15

when it's your kid, you don't, I

45:17

don't even like to suck up my own snot. That's

45:19

probably why I sound so nasal today. Ladies, am I

45:21

right? I mean, that's, it is what it is. Okay,

45:24

so then

45:26

Janet says she misses Kristen, but she don't

45:28

miss Zach. So she says her and Kristen

45:30

were like the best duo. And we've never

45:32

seen that. So I'm like, is that true?

45:34

I don't know if I believe that because

45:36

I don't, I've never seen them together. So

45:39

I don't know. Then we

45:41

have, Jax is at his

45:43

bar with Schwartz. And I think

45:46

Schwartz's brother was there maybe. And also someone

45:48

named Mikey in a denim vest that

45:50

was very shocking to the naked eye. Didn't

45:53

even notice that. I mean.

45:55

I could talk about that man for five minutes.

45:58

He looked like he was from a low -budget

46:00

version of Sons of Anarchy. Do you remember that

46:02

show with Charlie Hunnam? One of

46:04

the hottest men. I've told you the story about

46:06

how I saw Charlie Hunnam at the grocery

46:08

store wearing gray sweatpants. Woo! But

46:10

still I rise. Never forget

46:12

that sight. Never forget that sight. I

46:14

mean, there's things that I can't remember to

46:16

save my soul, but I can see

46:18

the image of Charlie Hunnam in gray sweatpants

46:20

at the grocery store. I

46:23

don't know, my last day of high school or

46:25

something. I don't know. I just, it's in my head.

46:27

I'll never forget it. Anyway, this Mikey fellas in

46:29

a denim vest. So I don't even know what they

46:31

were talking about. It was just like a very

46:34

interesting, it was just nothing wrong with that. It just,

46:36

it was a lot for me to breathe

46:38

in. You know how you see

46:40

something sometimes? Like Charlie Hunnam and Grace Wetpants. It's

46:42

like you see it, and it almost stops you

46:44

in your tracks and takes your breath away, and

46:46

you're like, got to breathe it in. It

46:49

wasn't the same as Charlie Hunnam. I'm just

46:51

saying the same kind of emotion where you

46:53

just completely freeze. It's like a functional freeze.

46:56

Or, yeah, you just sort of

46:58

breathe it in. It's kind of the opposite of trauma.

47:00

You know when you experience a trauma and you just

47:02

sort of forget it for the rest of your time?

47:04

And then it comes up in therapy, and you're like,

47:06

oh, I forgot that happened, or I don't remember seeing

47:08

that. And it's like the opposite of that. So next

47:10

time I'm at the therapist, I'm going to say, how

47:12

can I forget Mikey in the denim vest? Do

47:14

you get what I mean? And how do

47:16

I remember some of those traumatic memories so I can work

47:18

through them and forget Mikey? You know, like I got

47:21

to clear out space in my head, especially with the baby

47:23

coming. I think I need

47:25

to like clear some space and deal

47:27

with the trauma that's like hidden deep in there.

47:29

And I need to get rid of like the

47:31

images of Mikey in the denim vest or Schwartz having

47:33

a lizard funeral in Vanderpump Rules. You know, like

47:35

I got to make room, got to make space.

47:37

Like those gals did when they made space in

47:39

space. I mean, what the fuck was that? Should

47:42

we talk about that for a minute? Those gals

47:44

who went to space? Katy Perry

47:46

and Gayle King and a lot of

47:48

other ones too, but... You

47:51

know how I feel about that? That's

47:56

how I feel about that. It was a

47:58

lot. It was a lot. I mean, they

48:00

went up there for five minutes. I don't

48:02

understand it. I

48:04

know they say it was like

48:07

to inspire people. I feel like

48:09

real astronauts should have, I mean, I guess they

48:11

did training and stuff. I want to be

48:13

open -minded about it, but the truth is I

48:15

don't understand it. I just don't get, I

48:17

felt like it's just, there's enough going

48:19

on here. And

48:22

what do we need to go to, I don't know.

48:24

I'm happy with the astronauts who want to go

48:26

to space and explore it for us, but I don't

48:28

know that we need someone revealing their tour set list

48:30

up there. You get what I mean? And

48:33

so, God bless. And I'm glad

48:35

they made it there and back

48:37

in the 11 minutes. But it

48:39

was... Anyway, Jesse,

48:42

we have this white party. Jesse

48:44

arrives, and he says hello to Michelle

48:46

and Aaron, the new boyfriend. So

48:48

they have an interesting dynamic. There was

48:50

one point where Aaron, the new

48:52

boyfriend, that's dating Michelle, there was one

48:54

time where he said something about

48:56

the parenting, and I thought, if I

48:58

was Jesse, he kind of kept

49:00

it cool. He did try to stick

49:02

it to Michelle about moving to

49:04

Orange County or whatever. But the fact

49:06

is, if Aaron, the new boyfriend,

49:08

was saying anything about parenting, uh -uh. Who

49:11

are you, sir? We don't even know. You just

49:13

got here. How about you get the

49:15

fuck out? You don't have no say in

49:17

this dynamic right now. If Michelle wants

49:19

to sit and talk about something that's going

49:21

on, that's one thing. She should say

49:23

her business as much as she wants. But

49:25

this other fella, Aaron, to try to

49:27

tell the father about something? I didn't like

49:30

that. I just didn't like that. Justice

49:32

for Jesse in that situation. Now, it was

49:34

also revealed that Britney had lube in her hair.

49:37

Did you catch that? Did anyone

49:39

catch that? Did you catch that? Because I

49:41

watched this twice, and I didn't catch it the first

49:44

time, so you might not have noticed. But when we

49:46

landed in this white party, there

49:48

was like a quick little clip. It happened

49:50

very fast. If you closed your eyes,

49:52

you might have missed it. Or if you

49:54

went to the bathroom, if you went

49:56

and got a snack. And then what

49:58

are we snacking on these days? If you went and got your

50:00

baked Cheetos, then you might've missed it.

50:02

But Brittany said, somebody was like, oh, your

50:04

hair looks so good, Britt. And she's like,

50:06

thanks, it's lube. You know, and it was

50:08

like, I think she was serious. I

50:11

think she was serious, you guys. Was

50:13

she serious? Was that a joke?

50:15

I don't think that was a joke. I

50:17

think Brittany actually had lube in her

50:19

hair to style it. That's

50:21

right. That's right. I

50:23

think it was lube in her hair. The human

50:25

world, it's a mess, girl. I

50:29

don't know. I don't know what else to say.

50:32

Was she out of hair gel? Did she

50:34

not have any Kerastasi Thermatique? Because

50:36

I've been using that Kerastasi. Have we talked

50:38

about this? The Kerastasi Thermatique or Thermique or

50:40

I don't know how you say it. But

50:42

ever since Lisa Barlow talked about it on

50:45

her show, I buy the blue one and I

50:47

put that in a little, a couple little, in

50:49

my palm, a couple of drops after I get out

50:51

of the shower. I put that in

50:53

my hair, and then I put the one, the white

50:55

bottle with the red, the vitamin C

50:57

one, I think it is. I put a little bit of that

50:59

in there. And it looks like hair gel,

51:01

but it goes on so smooth, and I swear

51:03

it's made my hair feel so healthy. This isn't an

51:05

ad, by the way, but it's really changed my

51:07

life. And now I'm thinking, as I'm

51:09

watching this, I'm like, Britt, you need to

51:11

get Kerastase. They're meek. We need, maybe Lisa Barlow

51:13

can send you some Kerastase. They're meek, because

51:15

they're matique, they're meek. I don't know how you

51:18

say it. I'm not even sure. But

51:20

you need to check into it.

51:22

Because I'm not sure that lube has

51:24

the same qualities that you're looking

51:26

for out of Karastasi Thermique. So maybe

51:28

just hop online. Online, you

51:30

can get it. All the stores have

51:32

them. And there's different options. Type in your

51:34

hair type or look up your hair

51:36

type or something. I would imagine they don't

51:38

recommend lube when you're looking that up.

51:41

If you say, how to style my hair at night,

51:43

I don't think they say lube. But maybe I'm

51:45

missing something. Again, maybe that's a beauty trend. It's going

51:47

to pop up and I'm to have to go

51:49

get some more lube just to put my hair. I

51:51

mean, there's something about Mary technique, I guess. But

51:54

I feel like if that would have worked, if

51:56

lube in the hair was actually like a good

51:58

thing for the hair, I feel like Cameron Diaz would

52:00

have capitalized off that years

52:02

ago. Years ago. You mean to

52:04

tell me Cameron Diaz, our

52:06

Lord and Savior, wouldn't have been

52:08

promoting a line of hair lube

52:10

for years now after there's something about Mary?

52:13

She knows. She knows better than anybody. She's

52:15

our foremother when it comes to lube and

52:17

the hair. And so I think Brittany needs

52:20

to maybe stop watching There's Something About Mary

52:22

and hop on a Sephora website and start

52:24

looking for the Cara Stassi. Call

52:26

up Stassi and see what Stassi wears because

52:28

I bet it's Cara Stassi because she's got

52:30

some good hair over there and not

52:32

lube. I don't know. Jesse

52:35

says he gets Botox, though, and I'm

52:37

proud of him. He's just very American psycho,

52:39

and I don't know why. I don't know why

52:41

am I liking Jesse so much. Is that disgusting?

52:43

Again, do not repeat this. If

52:46

you see me on the streets, sometimes I go to the

52:48

grocery store or something, people say, I like your show or

52:50

whatever. And I love that. It's so fun, especially when somebody

52:52

comes up to me. The best is when somebody comes up

52:54

to me and is like, what did you think of Salt

52:56

Lake City? What

52:58

did you think of that fucked up,

53:00

floppy Beverly Hills episode? I love

53:02

that. It makes my day. It makes

53:04

my day when I just chat

53:06

about that. But one thing

53:08

I will just completely ignore is if you come

53:10

up to me and say, hey, remember when you

53:13

liked Jesse Lally? Because I will just look the

53:15

other way. I'll just pretend I'm not even there.

53:17

I'll just pretend. You

53:20

can talk to me about anything else. Literally, let's

53:22

talk about Britney's hair lube or the lemon that

53:24

Lil gave Carl on the date last week. I

53:26

mean, literally anything else. I will sit and talk

53:28

to you for an hour and I'll miss whatever

53:30

appointment I'm going to or whatever else I got

53:32

to do that day. I will

53:34

say, fuck it all. I want to sit and

53:36

chat. I like to sit and chat. I

53:38

want to know who your favorite housewife is, what shows

53:41

you're watching. And I will

53:43

not respond, though, if you say, hey, Danny,

53:45

remember how you like Jesse Lally? Unless

53:47

maybe like, you know, I will say one

53:49

time, I don't know if I should reveal

53:51

this. One time on

53:53

the podcast, I did say

53:55

that I sort of

53:57

understood an attraction to Terry

54:00

Dubrow. I'm

54:02

not proud of it. Although I did see

54:04

him recently and the face settled. I don't

54:06

know if you've noticed, Terry Dubrow's face is

54:08

settled. I don't know what he did or

54:10

didn't do or what he had done or

54:12

had undone, but I feel like I just saw him recently

54:14

and I was like, his face looks like it's settled.

54:16

But anyway, I did reveal that on the podcast. It was

54:18

a very vulnerable moment. I think I was maybe, it

54:21

was a very vulnerable moment. It was probably like when

54:23

I was dealing with fertility struggles, you know? Last

54:27

year, a lot going on last year. It's a very

54:30

dark place and a lot going on. I

54:32

know people, women out there dealing with

54:35

IVF, fertility issues. There was all sorts

54:37

of that stuff as we were on

54:39

our journey that we're on now. But

54:41

it can be a stressful, dark time,

54:43

and you just feel like you're not

54:45

sleeping as good because you're thinking about

54:47

everything. It took us a

54:49

really long time to get... To

54:51

where we are now, we're due in June, which is

54:53

exciting. But, you know, there's so many struggles that

54:56

go into that. And so sometimes your brain and everything,

54:58

like, you're fucked up. And you're sad

55:00

and you're anxious and you're not sleeping well and

55:02

everything's going on. So I think that was, like,

55:04

a very vulnerable time in my life that I

55:06

maybe revealed that information that I don't even know

55:08

if I agree with now. I certainly don't. But

55:10

I did, I

55:12

remember around that time, like, somebody came up to me. I

55:14

think it was, like, grocery store or somewhere. And

55:17

was, like, kind of whispered to me, like, Danny,

55:19

I get it about Terry. And I thought, whew,

55:22

thank God. You know, so if you come up

55:24

to me in that way, like that's, and we

55:26

can agree on it, then that's okay. But

55:29

I don't want anyone coming and judging me

55:31

about Jesse Lally. So just hear me, hear

55:33

that. Anyway, they,

55:36

Schwartz does

55:38

tell Jax. Well,

55:40

Jax asked about Schwartz's bar and he's like, eh, it's

55:42

fine, but really it's closed down now. And so

55:44

I don't know, what are they going to put in

55:46

that place next to the pet shop that Schwartz

55:48

and Sandy was in? They should put

55:50

something, they should actually put like

55:52

a, I don't know, another pet

55:54

thing, like something for fish or I don't know,

55:56

maybe expand the pet shop. I feel like you should be

55:58

able to get, it should be a one -stop shop. So

56:00

you get in there, you're no longer going

56:03

to get the lobster corn dog. Now

56:05

you can go and get your dog food at the

56:07

pet shop and then you should be able to

56:09

go next door and maybe, maybe it should be

56:11

like a cat gym or something, you know, like something for

56:13

all the pets. Cat gym,

56:15

that's really what they should put in a cat gym.

56:17

Just put some stuff the cats can, They

56:19

work out, and they go up those. Do

56:22

they have those? I don't know. Does

56:24

cat gym exist? Is that a

56:26

thing? I feel like they've got cat cafes and stuff.

56:28

They must have cat gyms. Don't

56:31

cats? I've never had a cat. I'm allergic

56:33

to cats. But I feel like, don't they

56:35

have those things that they crawl up? They

56:38

like to be active. So I feel like

56:40

maybe put a cat gym. I mean, it could

56:42

be for dogs and cats. Just a gym,

56:44

a pet gym. But I feel

56:46

like I like the name cat gym. And

56:49

so put that next door. It'd

56:51

be one -step shop. You could go with all

56:53

your animals. And so LVP could hop on

56:55

over there. Maybe even for LVP, she can bring

56:57

the swans, the donkeys. I don't know what

56:59

the fuck she's got these days, but like put

57:01

them in there and let them go run

57:03

wild because that's what it should

57:05

be and not at a bar, not

57:07

a Bravo bar. Anyway,

57:10

Schwartz tells Jax it needs to get therapy.

57:12

It's like, no shit, dummy. No

57:17

shit. No

57:20

shit. Do we even have to say

57:22

that on TV on Mic'd Up? That should

57:24

just be a given. Like, Jack should

57:26

get therapy. Like, no shit. No shit. No

57:29

shit. No shit. And

57:31

also, you should have moved out of that house.

57:33

And I wish Schwartz or somebody would have said, like,

57:36

why didn't you move out of the house? Why

57:38

did you make your son and mother of your child

57:40

move out of the house after you fucked up? Anyway,

57:43

now we have also... Michelle

57:46

says Isabella wants everything because Jesse buys her too

57:48

much shit. And oh, this is when Aaron chimed

57:50

in about like buying too much shit. And that's

57:52

when I would have been pissed. I would have

57:54

cold cocked his ass. I would have

57:56

cold cocked. I wouldn't have been surprised if Jesse cold

57:58

cocked his ass. And I don't promote

58:00

violence, but I'm just saying

58:02

maybe he could have verbally or emotionally cold

58:05

cocked his ass because I felt like Aaron

58:07

shouldn't have been chiming in about what Jesse

58:09

buys his daughter. Anyway,

58:11

then we have Janet pulling Kristen

58:13

aside. I think Janet thought, she

58:16

sort of had the upper, I think going

58:18

into last season, the first season of this

58:20

show, I think she sort of thought she

58:22

had the upper hand because she was pregnant.

58:24

And yet somehow the audience did not care

58:26

for Janet. Now I was on her side

58:28

last season. I think I was the only one,

58:30

maybe not on her side is not the right

58:32

term, but I was, you know, I thought she's

58:34

pregnant. We need to give her some grace of

58:36

what's going on. But the audience didn't seem to

58:38

feel that way. And so I think she

58:40

had thought she had the upper hand, but then

58:43

it turned out she didn't. And the truth

58:45

is, If it really comes down to it, this

58:47

is Kristen's show. Especially with Jax

58:49

now. Who knows what's going on with that

58:51

demon? Because I think he

58:53

leaves. Doesn't Jax leave for a few

58:55

episodes this season? I'm pretty sure he's

58:57

out of it for a few episodes. And

58:59

so this is Kristen's show. Whether

59:01

you like it or not, this is Kristen's show.

59:04

This is a Dodie show. And

59:06

so now Janet seems to be

59:08

wanting to get this friendship back

59:10

with Kristen. But Kristen's sticking up

59:12

for her friend Wig over there.

59:14

And then, so Janet's like apologizing

59:16

for roping in Kristen to all

59:18

of Wig's behavior. But then Janet

59:21

is like, well, Kristen, are you sorry for

59:23

anything? And Kristen is like, no. And this

59:25

is Kristen's show. And I think Janet's playing

59:27

this all wrong. She sort of storms out.

59:29

And I'm like, Janet, girl, we need you

59:31

to make up with Kristen. And

59:33

so you need to just like say, I'm sorry,

59:35

and not say, what are you sorry for?

59:37

Because that also never works in reality TV. It

59:39

never works to say, what are you sorry

59:41

for? It doesn't work in real

59:43

life either because if you're getting an apology,

59:46

the apology shouldn't come with me having

59:48

to apologize too. Do you get what

59:50

I'm saying? Everyone will apologize

59:52

when they're ready. And so

59:54

when you're demanding an apology

59:56

just after you're giving an apology, kind

59:59

of negates the apology you just

1:00:01

gave. Am I making sense? Probably not. Then

1:00:04

Jesse and Michelle talk about moving. Jesse

1:00:06

says he wants to move to Newport because

1:00:08

his new girlfriend is in Orange County. Now,

1:00:11

I wouldn't mind, actually, I hate to say it. I

1:00:13

hate to say it. Not that Orange

1:00:15

County, the railhouses of Orange County, I don't think they

1:00:17

need much going over there because I feel like they

1:00:19

got a lot going on. And

1:00:21

it was a good season last year.

1:00:23

So Hip and Casita are running that

1:00:26

place and they're keeping that show afloat.

1:00:28

And they're doing a good job over there

1:00:30

in Orange County Housewives. So I don't

1:00:32

think they need anything. But if they were

1:00:34

looking into casting, I wouldn't mind if

1:00:36

they start looking into Jessie's new girlfriend. And

1:00:38

then we get Jessie appearances in Orange

1:00:40

County. We don't need about 100 shows. But

1:00:42

if Orange County flops next season, then we're

1:00:44

going to have to bring in Jessie's new

1:00:46

gal. Because I feel like there

1:00:48

could be some interesting stuff there. And

1:00:50

they would fit in and be Orange County

1:00:52

and great, great. But

1:00:54

Michelle's not, she's like, you're not moving

1:00:56

to Orange County. She's like, I'll

1:00:59

go get full custody then. Now this

1:01:01

is dark, heavy stuff. We're talking

1:01:03

custody arrangements and where the daughter's going

1:01:05

to go to school. And Jesse says

1:01:07

he's just doing it to get a

1:01:09

rise out of Michelle. I mean, this

1:01:11

is good reality TV, but it's very

1:01:13

diabolical, very evil. And so it's good

1:01:15

TV. And so look, that's on

1:01:17

all of us. We're all, and

1:01:19

it's not just me. I know

1:01:22

I'm here recapping it for

1:01:24

a living, but honestly, it's on

1:01:26

all of us that we support these.

1:01:28

These demons. And so, it is

1:01:30

what it is. Am I going to stop? No. Not

1:01:32

at this point. Yeah. I

1:01:35

don't know. That's the end of the

1:01:37

episode, though. Brittany says, thanks, everybody, for

1:01:39

coming. And then they cheers to free

1:01:42

Brittany. And then

1:01:44

we see coming up, there's lots

1:01:46

of mess. There's Brittany's

1:01:48

scare. Jack says, rehab. Brittany says,

1:01:50

you're dangerous. You need help. And then

1:01:52

she has to put... She

1:01:54

also finds out in the house he's videoing

1:01:57

her or something. She's got to put

1:01:59

blankets. She's Emeril on Summer House bringing home a

1:02:01

gal. It's like Brittany's got to put the

1:02:03

sheet over the camera in the house. I'm like,

1:02:05

what's going on? This is dark. It's dark

1:02:07

side. Also, Jax had a girl over who left

1:02:09

a thong on the counter and then wiped

1:02:11

her Rita Moreno with a wet wipe and left

1:02:13

it on the counter. What

1:02:16

was that about? Jax is served

1:02:18

on camera? Michelle

1:02:21

slept with a billionaire. Jason apparently

1:02:23

goes out without his wedding ring. Jasmine's

1:02:26

yelling at somebody. Brittany's being watched.

1:02:28

Nia versus Brittany. Kristen, the trailer ends

1:02:30

with Kristen calling Janet a fan. The

1:02:35

human world, it's a mess,

1:02:37

girl. All right, let's

1:02:39

take one more break and come back. We got to talk

1:02:41

about Summer House. Thank you to Acast. We'll be right

1:02:43

back. And

1:02:49

we're back. Should

1:02:54

have played that for Jax getting out of the house.

1:02:56

There's no reason Brittany should be at the rental. All

1:02:58

right, you hear me, Jax? Maybe

1:03:02

Britt should have been playing that on the iPad instead of

1:03:04

sending the sexy videos. She should have told the husband

1:03:07

to get out of the house. Leave!

1:03:09

Leave! Okay, Summer House, you

1:03:11

guys, we open on Paige and Sierra

1:03:13

talking about Craig. She's very anxious because she's

1:03:15

worried Craig's going to see the conversation

1:03:17

that she had with Sierra about not liking...

1:03:19

Craig anymore. And this is all happening

1:03:22

at Kyle's Sunset DJ gig. And so Paige

1:03:24

says she was the most anxious she's

1:03:26

ever been because she's got the tour coming

1:03:28

up. She says she's got everything she wanted,

1:03:30

but she hates the boyfriend, Craig. And she thinks

1:03:32

he's not being supportive. And I get it. You

1:03:34

guys, I'm team Paige again. I don't know what

1:03:36

else to say about it. But you

1:03:38

know what's fascinating to me on Summer House? After

1:03:41

Kyle's Sunset DJ gig, they did decide

1:03:43

to go to a bar club. And

1:03:46

they always say, we always hear that,

1:03:48

oh, they can't film anywhere there. There's

1:03:50

nowhere to film and they

1:03:52

don't want them there. And now

1:03:54

all of a sudden, we're

1:03:56

finding that they're able to go

1:03:59

to this, what is it, a bar

1:04:01

or restaurant? And I'm thinking, well, what are you

1:04:03

all lying to us for and saying they can't

1:04:05

film nowhere there? Because I'm seeing them out at

1:04:07

a public place at a bar or restaurant having

1:04:09

a good time. It was Lindsay and Kyle's birthday.

1:04:11

They brought in some sparklers for them. And I'm

1:04:13

thinking, I got you. We caught you. Just

1:04:16

like I should, I'll

1:04:18

get you good. We

1:04:20

got you. We got you, producers. So stop

1:04:22

telling me that we can't film around

1:04:24

the Hamptons or wherever the fuck they are.

1:04:26

Because I just saw them there. They

1:04:28

were at a bar or a club in

1:04:30

public. So what's the truth? What's the

1:04:33

truth? We got you. Just like I

1:04:35

should, I'll get you good.

1:04:37

On candid camera. We got

1:04:39

you on candid camera. They're

1:04:41

out in the, Lindsay was pregnant at the club

1:04:43

with her ex celebrating her birthday. And

1:04:46

you mean to tell me all this time I

1:04:48

keep hearing from the cast and from production and

1:04:50

interviews and stuff. Well, they can't film anywhere there.

1:04:52

It's like, well, what's the truth? Because I'm looking

1:04:54

at you and you're filming somewhere public. So why

1:04:56

can't they film there more often? Even if that's

1:04:58

the only place, at least we don't got to

1:05:00

look at that house again. So this,

1:05:02

they're lying to us and I will

1:05:04

not be bamboozled any longer because we

1:05:06

caught you. We caught you on candid

1:05:09

camera. Anyway, I

1:05:11

was happy that they went

1:05:13

out. And I don't understand exactly like

1:05:15

the dynamics here, but I'm happy that Lindsay's

1:05:17

celebrating birthday pregnant at the club with her

1:05:19

ex. You know, it is what it is. And

1:05:22

yeah, she's, you know what?

1:05:24

Did I ever tell, I haven't told this story yet, but I

1:05:26

found out we were pregnant on my last birthday. And

1:05:29

it was the same day I was interviewing

1:05:31

JC Shazay. That's right,

1:05:33

it was the greatest day of my life. You guys aren't ready for

1:05:35

that full story, which will be my next book, I promise. Okay,

1:05:37

so then we have at home, Paige

1:05:39

and Sierra's room's a mess. It was

1:05:41

very much stressing me out. There were

1:05:44

hangers on the floor, and I understand

1:05:46

these are messy people, but

1:05:48

I was very uncomfortable touching down

1:05:50

in that room. And I

1:05:52

don't feel like it's been messy this much this

1:05:54

season. But I noticed a lot of mess

1:05:56

in that room. And I did not care for

1:05:59

it. I couldn't even focus on what they were

1:06:01

saying or doing because all I was seeing was the

1:06:03

hanger on the floor. Just the one hanger on

1:06:05

the floor. Like, we couldn't pick up the one hanger. The

1:06:07

one hanger. Just get the hanger up. It

1:06:10

was a hanger. Just hang that up.

1:06:12

And I'm not even going to fault them for

1:06:14

all the clothes on the ground or the

1:06:16

makeups everywhere. But the one stray hanger on the

1:06:18

floor was... There was something that was really

1:06:20

upsetting me about it. It felt very dark -sided

1:06:22

to me, and I just wish they would have

1:06:24

picked up that one hanger, just the one

1:06:26

on the ground. It made

1:06:28

me just feel uneasy. And then

1:06:30

we kept seeing Lindsay's room when they got

1:06:32

back. And Lindsay's room, she had the bed

1:06:34

made. The suitcase was in

1:06:37

a nice spot. And then Paige in Sierra's

1:06:39

room, it's like, no wonder Paige's got so

1:06:41

much anxiety because the hanger's on the floor.

1:06:43

That would be enough. I wouldn't even care if

1:06:45

my... I didn't love my boyfriend,

1:06:47

or I was going on a 60 -city tour

1:06:49

or whatever, I would be more

1:06:52

anxious about the fucking hanger on the floor. I

1:06:54

just thought, that's what's the problem, Paige. And she

1:06:56

had to get out of that room, and she

1:06:58

did ultimately get out of the room and go

1:07:00

to the one where Emeril's fucking someone next door.

1:07:02

But actually, I was like, Paige would have been

1:07:04

fine in that other room with Sierra, maybe. She

1:07:06

wouldn't have heard Emeril fucking, but she would have

1:07:08

at least been in a safe space without a

1:07:10

hanger on the floor. And anyone out there with

1:07:13

anxiety, you know, you've got to be in a

1:07:15

clean space. If I'm in a hectic, chaotic space,

1:07:17

it's like that's going to make my anxiety worse.

1:07:19

So I was screaming to the TV like, Sierra,

1:07:21

I know you want to comfort your friend, but the best

1:07:23

comforting you could do is hanging up that hanger. Just that

1:07:25

one stray hanger. There was no clothes on it. It's like

1:07:28

you took a dress off it or something. So let's just

1:07:30

put it back in the closet. It's

1:07:32

really quick. Again,

1:07:34

not faulting. There's all these other kind

1:07:36

of messes in that room. And I could

1:07:38

say, oh, pick up the food or

1:07:40

clean up the makeups or whatever. But it's

1:07:42

that hanger would drive me nuts. And

1:07:44

so I think with her anxiety, that's a

1:07:46

start. And so I thought, Sierra, if

1:07:49

you want to be for her, Paige,

1:07:51

if you want to get that anxiety under control, you

1:07:53

need to hang up that hanger, girl. Anyway,

1:07:56

they ultimately have to FaceTime Lindsay for

1:07:58

her birthday, even though they're in the same

1:08:00

house, which I loved. Now,

1:08:03

it's also when they get back, Jesse and Lexi are

1:08:05

fighting on a hot mic because Lexi was flirting

1:08:07

with Wes. And

1:08:12

Jesse says it was way worse than

1:08:14

the toe sucking, which to me that he's

1:08:16

trying to trick her. He's trying to trick

1:08:19

her. I don't think that's way worse. And even

1:08:21

Lexi says she was just holding him up

1:08:23

because West couldn't hold himself up, which is all

1:08:25

very dark sided as well, because these men

1:08:27

are adults and they shouldn't be at a club

1:08:29

or a bar where they can't even stand

1:08:31

up straight. Am I

1:08:33

the only one? Am I too square? Maybe.

1:08:36

But the truth is, I don't think they should

1:08:38

not be able to stand in a club. I think

1:08:40

at a certain point, you need to scale back the

1:08:42

drinking if you can't stand in the club. And so

1:08:44

Lexi said she got to hold him up. And then

1:08:46

Jesse is saying, oh, that's worse than the toe sucking.

1:08:48

I'm like, you're just trying to trick her. That's not

1:08:51

worse than the toe sucking. And you were

1:08:53

there. The fact is, Lexi wasn't there

1:08:55

when you were sucking hoof in the room

1:08:57

with Emerald's two gals that went and signed

1:08:59

the release. And so that's the problem. Because

1:09:01

at least Lexi, even if she was flirting

1:09:03

with Wes, which I don't believe she was,

1:09:05

but even if she was, it was with

1:09:07

Jesse there. And so... I don't know. They're

1:09:10

all drinking too much, but they're very

1:09:12

drunk. Lexi thinks Jesse's

1:09:14

now too jealous. It's

1:09:16

very fucked up, and they're too drunk. And this

1:09:18

is when I felt really old. I felt like an

1:09:20

ancient dinosaur. And I know that I am an

1:09:22

ancient dinosaur, but I was just shouting at the screen,

1:09:24

like, stop drinking! I

1:09:28

know. And especially Kyle. When

1:09:30

Kyle got back at like 5 a

1:09:33

.m. and Amanda just was like, oh,

1:09:35

well, I knew he was in the

1:09:37

house or something. I'm like, girl, you

1:09:39

need to love yourself. Because it's not

1:09:41

normal for your 40 -something boyfriend to be

1:09:43

coming home at 5 a .m. And the

1:09:45

fact is this is happening on camera.

1:09:48

And he couldn't even make it to

1:09:50

the bedroom. He had his fly down

1:09:52

because he just was sitting in a

1:09:54

chair. And then he woke up like

1:09:56

catatonic. And I'm like thinking. I would

1:09:58

be so incredibly embarrassed. Like, your family's watching

1:10:00

this. Your friends are watching

1:10:02

this. And he's really humiliating himself

1:10:04

and vis -a -vis you by acting

1:10:06

that way. Like, acting like

1:10:08

a 20 -year -old frat guy, I

1:10:10

just was so uncomfortable with that. I'm like,

1:10:13

and again, I know every time I say

1:10:15

something about Kyle's drinking or whatever, people say

1:10:17

I'm ageist or whatever. And I'm not saying

1:10:19

people can't have fun. I just feel like

1:10:21

he should have some more respect for... Amanda

1:10:23

and even Amanda's family and

1:10:25

Amanda's friends have respect because you

1:10:27

look like an idiot and you're

1:10:30

a grown person and you're coming back

1:10:32

at 5 a .m. drinking that much

1:10:34

and you can't even make it

1:10:37

to the bedroom that you're staying in.

1:10:39

It's embarrassing. You should be better than

1:10:41

that by now. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

1:10:43

Imral also brings back another girl and he

1:10:45

has to put the sheet over the

1:10:47

camera. And

1:10:50

they were making noises. It sounded like the ultrasound.

1:10:52

Didn't it sound like that? The

1:10:56

noises there were. And Paige went into Gabby's

1:10:58

room, and she just hears the fuck in.

1:11:01

I don't know. I'm just,

1:11:03

I was embarrassed by all of these

1:11:05

people. I'm sorry. I was. I loved watching

1:11:08

it. But then we have the next

1:11:10

morning, Amanda finds Kyle on that chair. Amanda's

1:11:13

like, I put a tracking device on my

1:11:15

husband because she's like, so I knew where

1:11:17

he was. I'm like, girl, this is so

1:11:19

embarrassing. It's not

1:11:21

a once a season thing. I feel like this happens

1:11:23

to Kyle a lot. And

1:11:25

I don't know. But Jesse's mad at

1:11:27

West for flirting with Lexi, I

1:11:29

guess. And then Paige just

1:11:31

wants to go home. She's

1:11:34

pissed at Emeril. And

1:11:36

honestly, if Emeril was on the Real Houses of

1:11:38

New York when Heather Holla Thompson was on,

1:11:40

could you imagine the kind of business that he'd

1:11:42

get from her? Remember when Holla Thompson on

1:11:44

that trip where Luanne was fucking the married guy?

1:11:46

And she walked in the room and she's

1:11:48

like, wake up, Ramona. Wake up, mama. Hey,

1:11:51

Mama. Holla. Hey, Mama.

1:11:53

You remember the good old days of

1:11:55

Brony when she just, she opened

1:11:57

up the blind. She's like, wake

1:11:59

up, Mama. Get

1:12:01

your ass up, Mama. And then

1:12:03

Ramona's like, go talk to Luann. And then she's

1:12:05

like, Luann. And that was when Luann was

1:12:07

like, be cool. Don't be all uncool. Be

1:12:10

cool. Don't be all uncool. You

1:12:12

know, Luann with that smoker's voice, which

1:12:14

she's still touring that smoker's voice. Inexplicably.

1:12:17

She was also just on some, like,

1:12:19

British series, like a scripted show. And

1:12:22

it was, like, sort of

1:12:24

old -timey. And I'm sorry, but there's, like, no

1:12:26

one that looks less old -timey than Luanne de

1:12:28

Lesseps. God love

1:12:30

her. God love her. And everybody should go see

1:12:32

her at least once in your life on tour. But

1:12:35

I can't think of anyone that

1:12:37

looks less like they fit in a

1:12:39

period piece than Luanne de Lesseps.

1:12:42

I mean, she's just got the kind

1:12:44

of 2025 smoker's voice that... they

1:12:46

didn't have back then, even with cigarettes.

1:12:48

It's like, Luann is from this

1:12:50

era, and she should not be in

1:12:52

a period piece. Period. That's the

1:12:54

truth. Because there is no way. But

1:12:57

anyway, if Heather Hella Thompson was

1:12:59

there, she'd walk into Emeril's room and

1:13:01

be like, Wake up, Mama Emeril! Or,

1:13:03

you know, she would be pissed. But

1:13:05

then, let's see. Lindsay and Carl talked at

1:13:08

the club, which was nice. Then

1:13:10

Carl and Sierra want to be closer. Sierra's

1:13:12

pissed at Emeril because she's, Pissed at

1:13:15

him on behalf of Paige, which I

1:13:17

liked. And when she was yelling at

1:13:19

Emeril, her legs were spread all the

1:13:21

way open. She was kind of like

1:13:23

what they say, man -spreading. And I

1:13:25

liked that. She was living in her.

1:13:27

She was just like, I'm about to

1:13:29

fuck you up. And I liked that

1:13:32

about her. I did. And Emeril says

1:13:34

he's not sorry. But I think when

1:13:36

it's affecting the house, that's when I think there's

1:13:38

a problem. Then, you know

1:13:40

what was so sweet? Speaking of Sierra

1:13:42

being sweet, she also cried. to

1:13:44

Paige about her anxiety. And it just

1:13:46

felt like a real friendship moment,

1:13:48

didn't it? Felt like you guys are

1:13:50

really friends and I wish she would have hung

1:13:52

up that hanger. But as it stands, I was

1:13:55

just like happy. And Paige does need to leave Craig

1:13:57

and she's nervous they'll break up. But she's like, I'm going

1:13:59

to put all those emotions away until after this

1:14:01

tour. After the tour, she'll deal

1:14:03

with it. Now, let's see.

1:14:05

Then we have a producer asked Lindsay about

1:14:07

if she's where she thought she'd be at 38.

1:14:10

And I don't think anyone is really. You

1:14:12

know, here's the thing. We all feel, especially you

1:14:14

go on social media and you think, oh, that

1:14:16

person's got this going on and I don't have

1:14:18

that going on or that person has this, I

1:14:20

don't have that. It's all a highlight reel. But

1:14:22

also, no one I think has it all really.

1:14:24

I hate to say it. I think it's

1:14:26

very rare. Maybe you have the family but not the job

1:14:28

or the job but not the family. Maybe your friendships

1:14:30

have fallen apart but you got the partner. Or

1:14:32

maybe vice versa. Or you're financially struggling, but

1:14:34

you do what you love. Or you hate what

1:14:36

you love, but you get a lot of

1:14:38

money for it. I think it's impossible to just

1:14:40

have it all. And so you're always going

1:14:43

to be looking at other people and be like,

1:14:45

they got that thing that I got, that

1:14:47

I want. But it's like, you

1:14:49

just kind of got to be happy with what you

1:14:51

got, right? Because I don't think anyone does have it

1:14:53

all. And social media and everything will make us believe

1:14:55

that we got it all. But the truth is, we

1:14:57

don't. We just don't. But Lindsay seems happy with this

1:14:59

Turner fella. She seems to not even care. She's very

1:15:01

loose. Not like with that other guy who she wanted

1:15:03

to make a sandwich. Excuse

1:15:05

me, my voice is going on. I've been

1:15:07

recording too long. Didn't expect to talk about

1:15:09

the Valley so long, so let's move through

1:15:12

this quick, because Danny's already been talking alone

1:15:14

in a room for an hour and 17

1:15:16

minutes. That's

1:15:18

crazy. Only a crazy person talks in a microphone

1:15:20

alone for an hour and 17 minutes, so

1:15:22

I'm sorry. Thank God for all of you listeners.

1:15:24

I love you so much. But

1:15:27

Jesse actually brings up, though, he

1:15:29

says to Lindsay, do you

1:15:31

think the baby will stay with us next summer? Now, I

1:15:33

don't think Lindsay should be back on the show next year.

1:15:35

I think she should be over there on Roni. But

1:15:37

I do also want her to visit at least

1:15:39

once with the baby. Just once, I want her to show up

1:15:41

to the summer house with the baby. Because I think that'd be

1:15:43

fun. Not for like a big party night, but

1:15:45

just, I don't know, I think it'd be fun.

1:15:47

Now, Paige leaves the house and she Ubers. Which, how

1:15:49

much is an Uber to where she's going? Like, that

1:15:52

must have been an expensive Uber. I

1:15:54

mean, that's expensive Uber. Then

1:15:57

we have Jesse and Lexi make up.

1:15:59

They said I you after 11 days. I

1:16:03

don't know. That's very concerning to me. Lexi

1:16:06

says she's speeding up how she feels to meet him

1:16:08

where he's at. And they both need to cool it. They

1:16:10

both just need to cool it. I know that Jesse,

1:16:12

I feel like he was rushing to have sex with her.

1:16:14

Because remember she said, she's like, I don't just have

1:16:16

sex with anybody. So I feel like he was doing it

1:16:19

for that reason. And now, I don't

1:16:21

know, the roles, they've all seemed to flip the roles

1:16:23

now, and Lexi's, like, less interested. Seems like she's

1:16:25

getting the ick from him, which she should, good. But

1:16:28

they both need to cool it. They both need

1:16:30

to cool it. Now, Lexi reveals that she has

1:16:32

a scene with her mom and the sister, and

1:16:34

they're both living with her. And,

1:16:36

like, I've already sort of said the red flags I

1:16:38

have with these two, but Lexi says they need

1:16:40

to be there so they can be in meetings together.

1:16:42

And I'm sorry, what? Like, I,

1:16:45

reps, okay. I

1:16:47

hate to say it, but if they're managing her,

1:16:49

which you don't need both of them to manage you,

1:16:51

but even if they were both managing you, I

1:16:53

feel like it's actually a detriment to your career because

1:16:55

I think most of the people that you're going

1:16:58

to work with, they're not going to want your mom

1:17:00

and the sister in the meeting. I

1:17:02

don't know how to say this properly.

1:17:05

People are going to be mad at

1:17:07

me. But I don't know. I have

1:17:09

a manager. I have an agent. I'm

1:17:11

with a very big agency. And

1:17:13

first of all, most of the things are

1:17:15

on phone and email. On big jobs, they'll come

1:17:17

and they'll check in. But

1:17:19

Lexi says they all sleep in the same bed

1:17:21

and they're at every meeting with her. And

1:17:23

I'm just like, these are red flags. And I

1:17:25

don't think it's good for anybody. Because I

1:17:27

always feel this way about family working together. And

1:17:29

I say this to someone in my family.

1:17:31

They work together. I'm sort of the black sheep

1:17:33

who ran away. But I think it's not

1:17:35

good for the relationship dynamics in the family. Because

1:17:37

your mom should just be your mom. I

1:17:39

don't think the mom should also be your boss

1:17:42

or your business partner or something. I think

1:17:44

it just causes a lot of issues. dynamics.

1:17:47

So these are red flags, and the

1:17:49

sister, because then they're relying on you for

1:17:51

money, and you're relying on them for

1:17:54

your career, and so it just muddies everything,

1:17:56

and so I don't think it's good.

1:17:58

I'm like, let's see, you need to

1:18:00

figure this out. Anyway, then

1:18:02

Jesse has this event at the American

1:18:04

Cancer Society Hope Lodge, which is nice.

1:18:06

People stay there, I guess, when they're

1:18:08

getting cancer treatments in New York. Carl

1:18:11

arrives, teeth first. Always just leading with those

1:18:13

chompers. I don't see anything else when he comes

1:18:15

into a room. Anyone else feel that way? Just

1:18:17

walks right in and I'm like, who's

1:18:19

that? Who are those teeth belonging to? And

1:18:22

then I'm like, I have to kind

1:18:24

of adjust my eyes. And look, he's got

1:18:26

great, I hate to talk about his

1:18:28

teeth, but just, is there a way, is

1:18:30

there a way we can kind of

1:18:32

like, I don't know. What's the opposite of

1:18:34

whitening teeth? like slather some mud on

1:18:36

them or something before he gets on camera

1:18:39

because sometimes it's like so bright. It's

1:18:41

like Ross from Friends. Remember when he whitened

1:18:43

his teeth? And they're just very bright.

1:18:45

And sometimes I got to adjust my television

1:18:47

set. Maybe this is a me

1:18:49

issue. I might have to adjust the contrast

1:18:51

on my TV screen because sometimes, I mean,

1:18:53

he was walking into this cancer event and

1:18:56

I'm like, whoa, you know, and God bless.

1:18:58

He's a handsome man, Carl. I'm sorry he

1:19:01

is. And so that's not to

1:19:03

say it's taking anything away. I'm just saying

1:19:05

every time I see you, I see teeth

1:19:07

first. And it's like, you shouldn't be walking

1:19:09

in a room and being blinded by the

1:19:11

teeth. I'm just, and so maybe just the,

1:19:13

I don't know. It just, maybe it's me.

1:19:15

I need to scale back. And maybe I

1:19:17

probably need to go whiten my own teeth.

1:19:20

Maybe I need to call up Carl and

1:19:22

figure it out because maybe I need to

1:19:24

meet somewhere in the middle there because I

1:19:26

don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

1:19:28

But anyway. West is really likable to me

1:19:30

this season, and I think that's because they're

1:19:32

barely showing him, you know? And that's the

1:19:34

key. That's the key. A lot

1:19:36

of times people want the main character energy

1:19:38

of a show, but the truth is on Bravo,

1:19:40

at least, I think it's best to be

1:19:42

kind of like a friend of, or kind of

1:19:45

not center -focused, because you get to be fun

1:19:47

and loose, and West, I think, is just

1:19:49

sort of barely being seen this season, and so

1:19:51

I think that's working for him. Now,

1:19:53

let's see, we

1:19:55

have... Next week on the show, Tom

1:19:57

Schwartz is going to show up. I'd rather Tom

1:19:59

Schwartz on Summer House than the Valley, I think. But

1:20:02

the girls are going to talk to Lexi, and that's the end

1:20:04

of the episode. Real Houses of

1:20:06

Beverly Hills reunion part three, 20th episode of

1:20:08

the season too much. And I

1:20:10

don't have much to say about this other than the

1:20:12

Garcelle situation was a little bit of a flop

1:20:14

to me. Oh, and Kyle Cook, going

1:20:16

back to Summer House. Kyle Cook, they

1:20:19

show footage of him with Moe and PK.

1:20:21

And that was very icky. And Kyle even

1:20:23

said that was like a huge turnoff to

1:20:26

her. And I get that.

1:20:28

And seeing the footage, like PK and

1:20:30

Kyle and Mauricio DJing together at

1:20:32

a party, like to the ladies out

1:20:34

there, I can't imagine, you all

1:20:36

need to love yourselves and do not

1:20:38

sleep with them if you see

1:20:40

them DJing at a party together because

1:20:43

it's very icky. And I know

1:20:45

they're on a reality TV show that

1:20:47

we all love. I get that.

1:20:49

You know, sometimes we get, bamboozled,

1:20:51

you love a show, and you're like, oh, let me

1:20:53

flirt with that guy. But you need to take a

1:20:55

step back and realize that guy is PK. That

1:20:58

guy is maybe not someone

1:21:00

we should be hooking up with.

1:21:03

Because the problem is that's why these men go

1:21:05

to these parties, because one of these young

1:21:07

gals flirt with them. And so it's an ego

1:21:09

boost, and even if they're not hooking up,

1:21:11

it's like they're getting flirted on by all these

1:21:13

women and people who watch Bravo. And so

1:21:15

I just need you all to take a step

1:21:18

back and think like, oh, that's... like,

1:21:20

that's PK. Like, that's

1:21:22

not, that's, be careful

1:21:24

here. Be careful. And

1:21:26

the gentleman, too, I mean, and look,

1:21:28

we've all been in those situations. know, I'm

1:21:31

sure I've flirted with one of them,

1:21:33

too, at a certain point, because I'm, like,

1:21:35

a little bamboozled. I'm like, wait a

1:21:37

minute, I love your show, but I have

1:21:39

to say to myself, like, no, love

1:21:41

yourself, and don't do it. Okay, and then

1:21:43

also, what else is happening on this? Garcelle,

1:21:46

her leaving, and I thought that was sort

1:21:48

of a flop. I mean, like,

1:21:50

they kept hyping it up. Like, Garcelle quits

1:21:52

the show, but she quit in, like, the last

1:21:54

minute. She obviously just quit because

1:21:56

she hates all these people. And

1:21:58

she's like, oh, this is all, like, fake.

1:22:00

Like, none of these relationships are real. And

1:22:02

so I was on her side with it.

1:22:05

And also Sutton was just, like, up everyone else's

1:22:07

ass. So it was like, yeah, she didn't

1:22:09

feel like she had a friend in her. I

1:22:11

didn't really understand, like, what she was saying

1:22:13

in terms of, like, oh, no one looked at

1:22:15

me and smiled and that kind of thing. Other

1:22:18

than she was just, I guess, saying none

1:22:20

of us like each other. Like, why are we

1:22:22

all pretending? And the truth is, like, why

1:22:24

are we all pretending? And maybe that's a production

1:22:26

issue that they need to figure out next

1:22:28

season. Because it seems to me that they hate

1:22:30

each other. Also, we talked about

1:22:33

Kyle maybe being a lesbian. Like, when

1:22:35

she said something about Portia, she's like, Portia just gave me

1:22:37

a hug. And it's like, I'll love you no matter

1:22:39

what. And Andy's like, that's what my dad said when I

1:22:41

came out. And Kyle's like, uh. Splits

1:22:46

Richard's like, well, I actually didn't. come

1:22:48

out. I just, I'm

1:22:50

questioning. And so I guess we're going

1:22:52

to have to just watch that get

1:22:54

dragged out for the end of time.

1:22:57

I'm sick of Beverly Hills. I don't have any

1:22:59

more thoughts on it because I'm just sick

1:23:01

of it. I think I wrote other notes, but

1:23:03

I didn't want to talk about them because

1:23:06

stupid show, just annoying me. Anyway, I love you

1:23:08

all so much for listening. What a long

1:23:10

episode. Again, next week, we'll be back on Wednesday

1:23:12

night, Thursday morning. That's when the episodes will

1:23:14

come out after Summer House airs. So that will

1:23:16

be the new schedule going forth. We'll have

1:23:18

new episodes on Wednesdays, not Monday. There will not

1:23:20

be a new episode on Monday. So do

1:23:22

not message me and say, where's the new episode

1:23:24

on Monday? It'll be out Wednesday night after

1:23:26

Summer House airs. So check the feed on Thursday

1:23:29

morning. It'll be there. And I

1:23:31

love you all so much for listening. This

1:23:33

was fun. Wow. And I got so many

1:23:35

kind words about the last new episode that

1:23:37

came out on Monday. I

1:23:39

had talked about some personal things, and I

1:23:41

thought it was a really funny one

1:23:43

too. I just got so many messages

1:23:45

about it and we hit number one. And

1:23:47

so I'm just grateful to everybody because yeah,

1:23:49

sometimes when I get a little more vulnerable

1:23:51

on the show, I always get nervous because

1:23:53

it makes me feel, I don't know. I

1:23:55

get worried that I'm. I always

1:23:57

worry. I'm like, what did I say? I hope I

1:24:00

didn't say something that I shouldn't have said, or I

1:24:02

hope I didn't reveal something about other people that I

1:24:04

shouldn't have revealed or whatever. And I want to be

1:24:06

honest and everything, but sometimes when you reveal something vulnerable,

1:24:08

I just keep all overthink it like before it comes

1:24:10

out. I'm like, oh, should I have cut that out

1:24:12

of the episode? Maybe I shouldn't have shared that because

1:24:14

it feels so personal. And so I

1:24:16

ended up hearing a lot of great messages

1:24:18

and people who are related or were very

1:24:20

supportive. So thank you so much for that

1:24:22

because it means a lot. I

1:24:25

often complain about messages sometimes because

1:24:27

people will, by and

1:24:29

large, people are very kind and nice to

1:24:31

me, but oftentimes you hear more from people

1:24:33

who have a complaint about something, how you

1:24:35

said something wrong or you got a fact

1:24:37

wrong or whatever, and you hear about that.

1:24:39

And that kind of sticks with you more

1:24:41

than when people reach out with kind words.

1:24:44

And sometimes people might like an episode or

1:24:46

something, but not always. reach out. And I

1:24:48

do read every message. I don't always get

1:24:50

a chance to respond to everyone, but I

1:24:52

see them all. And so it means a

1:24:54

lot when people reach out with those kind

1:24:56

messages. And I just, it makes my day

1:24:58

and it makes me feel so good to

1:25:00

come and do this podcast. So thank you

1:25:02

all for those kind words. And

1:25:04

for sharing the podcast and telling people to listen.

1:25:06

We've been doing this seven plus years. We're

1:25:08

on the eighth year, I guess. And I just

1:25:10

had a meeting with ACAST, who is fantastic.

1:25:12

They sell all the ad space and all that

1:25:14

kind of stuff. And the

1:25:16

rep I was talking to, he was

1:25:19

saying like, I'm a unicorn in this

1:25:21

podcast industry because we've been doing it

1:25:23

for so long and people are still

1:25:25

tuning in and such large numbers. And

1:25:27

so it just, I can't believe it.

1:25:29

I'm so grateful that I still get

1:25:31

to do this and make a great

1:25:33

living doing it. And I'm grateful. So

1:25:35

I love you all. And

1:25:38

bye -bye. It's

1:26:03

only for

1:26:05

you There's no

1:26:07

turning back

1:26:09

No, no It's

1:26:11

only after you