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Kevin here. here. This is two

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2024 that we're were unpaid walling

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today. If you'd like to check

1:01

out the other 359 episodes

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of the pro version, version, that

1:06

we've done, they're all available at

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patreon.com slash at Thanks

1:10

so much. We will be returning

1:12

with new episodes next week Thanks year.

1:14

much. We will be returning

1:16

with new episodes next

1:18

out this new sound new

1:20

been working on. sound I've been

1:23

Let me know when you're

1:25

ready for it. when you're ready

1:27

for it. it kind is it like?

1:30

It's like very sudden

1:32

like is it gonna be kind of kind

1:34

of scary like what? yeah,

1:36

it is okay. Oh, it's

1:38

really gonna shake you

1:40

up you up be, I'm gonna be

1:42

quiet for a little bit and then

1:44

I'm be sound. a I really talk about that

1:46

kind of stuff. then I fight

1:48

with that, sound yeah I don't

1:51

really like that kind of

1:53

not ready don't really you

1:55

said. that so it's when

1:57

you're ready. I'm not ready. I actually don't fuck with

1:59

that kind of shit. not Okay. It's exactly

2:01

the kind of thing

2:04

I don't like. That's

2:06

exactly the kind of

2:09

sound I don't know.

2:11

Ah, whoa! Didn't scare

2:13

me the second time.

2:16

It's, it's a, it's,

2:18

to my knowledge, brand

2:21

new. I just been

2:23

tinkering with different syllables,

2:26

you know. Val

2:28

sounds one hard consonant

2:30

and I just I

2:32

somehow stumbled on it

2:34

and it's one of

2:36

these things where as

2:38

new as it is

2:41

and this is true

2:43

of great songwriting of

2:45

great writing any of

2:47

any kind of great

2:49

podcasting that the moment

2:51

you discover and initiate

2:53

it It feels

2:56

ancient, yes? That it has

2:58

existed always that you did

3:00

not create so much as

3:02

summon from the middle of

3:04

your bones. The two songs

3:06

that I remember having an

3:08

argument with my friend in

3:10

the car about... driving to

3:12

school that they were old

3:14

that they were old songs

3:17

were beautiful day by you

3:19

two yep and follow new

3:21

it's always been and follow

3:23

me by uncle cracker uncle

3:25

cracker both of those songs

3:27

so perfect that I could

3:29

not envision a world where

3:31

they had not always We

3:33

just figured this out. No,

3:35

I'm sorry. We've all known

3:37

Follow Me since before we

3:39

heard Follow Me. We couldn't

3:41

have missed... Follow me has

3:43

always been there. We couldn't

3:46

have like just had had

3:48

the chance at that so

3:50

many times and not taken

3:52

it. Some ratings not now.

3:54

Yeah. No, that's something that

3:56

got it did not get

3:58

written. It was picked up

4:00

off of the ground where

4:02

it always was. Follow me

4:04

is older than the hills.

4:06

That that's all that sound

4:08

is actually I needed that

4:10

I needed that. I needed

4:13

that. I needed that. I

4:15

needed. I needed that. I

4:17

needed that. I needed. I

4:19

needed that. I needed that.

4:21

I needed. I needed. I

4:23

needed. I needed. I needed.

4:25

I needed. I needed. I

4:27

needed. I needed. I needed.

4:31

I needed that. Oh, I'll

4:33

go. That, um... Oh, I

4:35

needed that. Got me up.

4:37

I had someone tell me,

4:40

oh, I needed that. I've

4:42

been, um, I've been slipping

4:44

a little bit. I've been

4:46

slipping a little bit. I,

4:48

uh, just kind of been

4:50

sitting around eating bear claws.

4:52

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

4:54

yeah. Just suck it down,

4:56

bare claws. You know why

4:58

they call him bear claws?

5:00

No, actually I don't. I

5:02

have a guess. Okay. Do

5:04

you want to hear my

5:06

guess? Yes, yes, yes. Go

5:08

ahead. You might be right.

5:10

Well. So everyone is familiar

5:12

obviously with Santa Claus. Yes,

5:14

yeah. But where he lived?

5:16

This is wrong. I just

5:18

want to. Oh. You can

5:20

finish your guess. There's no

5:22

way to get from... Oh

5:24

thank you that I can

5:26

finish my guess. It's just

5:29

a matter, it's just how

5:31

you want to use your

5:33

time because this is not...

5:35

Like my time here on

5:37

Earth? Yes, how you want

5:39

to spend... Or am I

5:41

a lot of your precious

5:43

little time? You're a precious

5:45

little time. It's just like

5:47

this is your time, you're

5:49

part of the episode and

5:51

then I will have all

5:53

of my time. So... We

5:55

all, we only have so

5:57

much time. Believe me.

5:59

I know. Sand in

6:01

the hourglass, eh? eh?

6:04

Well, I But I don't

6:06

need to finish my to finish my

6:08

guess. It's because...

6:11

my mind in my mind

6:13

has a Has

6:16

a secret family Right.

6:18

And that with

6:20

his... I want to

6:23

be to be

6:25

clear first and this... And you

6:27

can tell me if I'm getting closer

6:29

I'm I go through this. I do

6:31

not I way condone not in any way

6:33

condone celebrate. beastiality

6:37

is not something is something I

6:39

think is I would not

6:41

say is I would not say a reason.

6:43

for a reason is not good.

6:45

The the animal. consent

6:48

is not a because Santa is

6:50

not a human they they don't deserve

6:52

pleasure they don't done it Not

6:55

no not not Not that

6:57

level. so we We

7:00

can't let them know about

7:02

that. know about that told

7:04

you before about the guy who used

7:06

to cut my hair in New York,

7:08

guy who used to cut my hair he was

7:10

telling me about, this guy Danny and

7:12

woman that he was seeing. me

7:14

about a Asking him

7:17

to make he was seeing asking him

7:19

to and he said to her

7:21

uh-huh and he said Hold Hold

7:23

up. I had to say I

7:25

had I had to say. had to

7:27

say, slow down, no, I

7:29

will have sex with

7:31

you, but make with

7:34

you! no, no way I'm

7:36

love. give her that much

7:38

I'm going to give her ha much

7:40

pleasure. know about that

7:43

either. As soon can't know about

7:45

that either. As soon as they know about that,

7:47

they go crazy. Well that

7:49

that was his stance, was

7:51

that if he did. the

7:54

the request then she then she it

7:56

would be not fair to

7:58

her because she would then be incurably

8:00

addicted to what the

8:02

dick did and that

8:04

he would not necessarily

8:06

be able to follow

8:08

through on that because

8:10

it just was not

8:12

the status of the

8:15

relationship. So it was

8:17

actually very nice of

8:19

him. He did have

8:21

sex. Oh yeah, sure.

8:23

But that level of

8:25

pressure, making love? So

8:27

anyway, that. That,

8:30

uh, he would be

8:32

playing, like, he would

8:34

be playing, like, pretty

8:37

mainstream hip-hop songs. But,

8:39

like, as if they

8:41

were the most extreme

8:43

underground stuff, be like,

8:45

whoa, whoa, whoa, did

8:47

you hear that? Like,

8:49

and then just, back

8:51

it up and play

8:53

part of it again,

8:55

and then one in

8:57

particular was, it was

8:59

a disc track, and

9:01

he was like... And

9:03

he got like right

9:05

in my ear at

9:08

the end of whatever

9:10

the verse was of

9:12

like, you know, um,

9:14

JZ, you know, talking

9:16

to Memphis Bleak or

9:18

something, just like something

9:20

that was like so

9:22

popular. And then he

9:24

just went like, he

9:26

ate his beans. So

9:28

my thought is. Santa

9:30

is not a human,

9:32

a mortal man, Santa

9:34

is a supernatural being,

9:36

and therefore, were he

9:39

to commune physically with

9:41

a polar bear, they

9:43

do live in the

9:45

North Pole, it would

9:47

not necessarily be immoral

9:49

because he's essentially a

9:51

spiritual entity. Yeah, in

9:53

my opinion and so

9:55

My thought is that

9:57

perhaps he is raising

9:59

a family of bare

10:01

man demigods. And that's

10:03

one of their names.

10:05

The youngest is named

10:07

bare claws. That's the

10:10

youngest one? Yeah, there's

10:12

a series before that.

10:14

Where the bare what,

10:16

can I finally name

10:18

one? You've been doing

10:20

an awful lot of

10:22

the naming. Nick. My

10:24

barber. Manny was Really

10:26

thought of himself as

10:28

being part of my

10:30

like sexual education Yeah,

10:32

when I was like

10:34

in college You always

10:36

asked me like so

10:38

what's like to tell

10:41

me about it was

10:43

really like he wanted

10:45

me to tell him

10:47

about different girls and

10:49

he was always so

10:51

so explosively horny for

10:53

Sarah Palin. He got

10:55

really really invested in

10:57

the 2008 election. He

10:59

got really like politically

11:01

involved because he was

11:03

so horny about it

11:05

and like wanted to,

11:07

it was very practical.

11:09

He was just like,

11:12

I just wonder, yes,

11:14

I just need to

11:16

be like secret. I

11:18

need this in the

11:20

24 hour cycle for

11:22

as long as possible.

11:25

So it's tough to argue with that

11:28

just in terms of your personal how

11:30

like these jobs affect you like affect

11:32

your life like he actually had it

11:34

figured out I think more than most

11:36

people do. It's true like for so

11:39

with no explicit like political leaning up

11:41

to that point going like well what

11:43

really happens to me based on who

11:45

gets elected president. Like yes, and there's

11:47

like in a global sense, there are

11:50

these policies that in some ways maybe

11:52

trickle back into my lived experience in

11:54

ways that I can probably never really.

11:56

detect or draw

11:58

the line draw but

12:01

what I know happens

12:03

for sure know happens for

12:05

sure is like on the

12:07

front of the

12:09

newspaper, on seeing this person

12:12

and this is very easy for

12:14

me now because that I know

12:16

will happen. person. And

12:18

this is very not

12:21

too long after. now because

12:23

that I know will

12:26

happen. He died not

12:28

too of a broken heart. No,

12:30

they call them

12:33

bare I

12:35

get bear. because when

12:37

I get bare

12:39

after after I

12:42

eat them The

12:44

claws nasty

12:46

comments Mean this

12:49

nasty being

12:51

rude. Oh,

12:53

That's too being

12:56

rude. Oh, no Where?

12:58

Body joke, body joke.

13:00

Oh no. Hazle. That's

13:02

why they call them, bear

13:05

claws, claws come they

13:07

can't blame claws come out.

13:10

a blame to, lot to

13:12

comment a lot to I

13:14

eat on. why

13:16

they're That's great. bear. That's

13:19

why they're that's

13:21

why they're called Bear Claws.

13:23

That's why they're called Bear much.

13:25

So my guess was was pretty. Far

13:28

away but among

13:30

the characteristics admit

13:33

you listed for Among

13:35

the characteristics that you

13:37

listed for yourself Santa having

13:39

sex with a polar bear couldn't

13:41

be part sex with a

13:43

polar bear couldn't be part of

13:45

some body pretty body. Was a famous story

13:48

famous story about the Yes. Going to

13:50

the Going to the woods. Kevin,

13:52

you know about this joke? joke?

13:54

Enlighten me. me. The The

13:56

hunter goes into the

13:58

woods woods and He loads

14:00

up his gun and he

14:03

sees the bear and he

14:05

takes aim and thinks he

14:07

has the perfect shot and

14:09

he fires and somehow he

14:12

has missed the bear. And

14:14

the bear taps him on

14:16

the shoulder, he's behind him

14:18

and he says to the

14:20

hunter, Good sir, you have

14:23

missed me. But I will

14:25

offer you a deal. A

14:28

proviso. What's a proviso? I

14:31

think it's a, yeah, it's

14:33

a condition and a deal,

14:35

I think. Okay. And so

14:37

there's a proviso. How long

14:39

do you deal with one

14:41

proviso? So he says, ah,

14:43

I will not harm you.

14:45

But you must allow me

14:47

to make love to you.

14:49

And once I've finished. having

14:51

sex with you the hunter

14:53

you can come back and

14:56

try again tomorrow to shoot

14:58

me and the hunter not

15:00

wanting to die of course

15:02

accepts the proviso and they

15:04

engage and know each other

15:06

carnally and the hunter goes

15:08

home and plans now He

15:10

really must shoot the bear.

15:12

And so he loads and

15:14

he practices, he goes to

15:16

the firing range and he

15:18

prepares himself again. And he

15:21

goes back into the woods

15:23

to the same spot and

15:25

he sees the bear. And

15:27

this time he waits until

15:29

he's so close, so close

15:31

he cannot possibly miss. And

15:33

he fires. And when the

15:35

smoke from the great shot

15:37

has cleared, he looks to

15:39

see what he is sure

15:41

will be the bear's carcass.

15:43

And yet there is nothing

15:46

and tap, tap, tap, tap

15:48

on the shoulder. Once again.

15:50

The same proviso is presented.

15:52

Well, this time, yeah, he

15:54

has to eat him out

15:56

this time. The hunter accepts

15:58

once again. And when

16:00

they have finished knowing

16:03

one one another

16:05

carnally, the hunter hunter

16:07

returns home. and now he

16:09

must do everything in

16:12

do everything in his power.

16:14

more more powerful weapons, more

16:16

advanced tactical

16:19

training. He sets

16:21

traps. He has

16:23

grenades. has He has everything

16:25

at his disposal. He

16:27

sells out entirely, and

16:29

he goes back. he with his

16:31

with his Bozuki. And he

16:34

gets the tree. the tree.

16:36

And he unleashes everything.

16:38

He unleashes modern

16:40

hell with all of

16:42

his his weaponry. And

16:48

the tap on the shoulder comes. comes,

16:50

the bear says to him. to him,

16:52

You're not not really here for

16:54

the for are you, pal? Ha, ha, ha. pal?

16:56

He's missing on purpose. He

16:59

thinks he likes it. The bear's

17:01

saying, missing on purpose. like thinks he likes

17:03

it. man. saying, hey, if you don't like

17:05

it, like come on, man. He brought all

17:07

that stuff at the ad. You can't

17:09

get it done with that stuff. stuff. Yeah,

17:12

I You're not really here for the

17:14

hunting hunting There's something, it something, may

17:16

There's wasn't even admitting to himself. perhaps

17:18

he wasn't even admitting to

17:21

himself Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

17:23

yeah, yeah Yeah, because so that know, know,

17:25

that's a body joke, joke. Yes, that

17:27

that actually lives sort of

17:29

in the world of the

17:31

bear of the bare claws Santa Claus theory that

17:34

I I presented. so, I know, sometimes

17:36

we feel like we're so

17:38

far apart we we find these

17:40

reasons to put up these walls.

17:42

Oppositional these Oh, walls. that guess

17:44

is ice ice cold and And I've

17:46

done it again. I've gone and

17:48

done oppositional defiance again. defiance

17:51

again well and I and I want to

17:53

put that label on it because

17:56

label was on it it. know that man about

17:58

it yeah yep, yep. yep But

18:00

I think it's a fair

18:03

description or what happened. I

18:05

would like to... Yeah. Go

18:08

ahead, go ahead. My man's.

18:10

Are you getting so cited?

18:12

Kevin, you get so excited?

18:15

Kevin? The big days coming

18:17

up! Really anxious, huh? I'm

18:19

getting... So anxious, mostly because

18:22

I've recently learned my future

18:24

mother-in-law has been telling people

18:26

there's a mandatory dress code

18:29

of 1920s flappers. That's interesting,

18:31

because I don't recall there

18:34

being a mandatory dress code

18:36

of 1920s flappers, but alas,

18:38

here we are. Now correct

18:41

me, the flappers, the flapper

18:43

is a style of dress

18:45

that is... you know, primarily

18:48

the women folk are flappers.

18:50

Mm-hmm. I have to wear

18:52

that as well. What about

18:55

men's garb? No. The men's

18:57

garb is suit suits. Well,

18:59

your mother-in-law better, be careful

19:02

lest she end up on

19:04

the wrong side of my

19:07

chain wallet. Kevin. Okay, let's

19:09

teach you a few moves

19:11

that you're going to need

19:14

to know. One is when

19:16

you shake your figure of

19:18

the air when you're dancing

19:21

there. You shake the one

19:23

finger. Here, get up and

19:25

stand back a little bit.

19:28

So we can see you

19:30

dance. When you dance, you

19:33

kind of kick your legs

19:35

up behind you back and

19:37

forth and you wave your

19:40

index finger around. But behind

19:42

you end off to the

19:44

side a little bit. You're

19:47

not jumping. It's like a

19:49

little kick. Yeah. And the

19:51

finger up there. The fingers

19:54

up high yeah, you forgot

19:56

the feet you have to

19:59

do both now Okay, that's

20:01

pretty good Now you put

20:03

your hands on both knees

20:06

and what you do is

20:08

you switch your knee. Your

20:10

knee that's on the one

20:13

leg, you take it and

20:15

you exchange it with the

20:17

other. Smooth motion, you move

20:20

your knees together and then

20:22

you swap knee. You switch

20:25

knees. With your hands you

20:27

take one off onto the

20:29

other. He's doing it. He's

20:32

doing it. He's doing it.

20:34

Yes, he's doing it. Let

20:36

me teach you, so I'm

20:39

just going to quickly say

20:41

this, Kevin, and this is

20:43

so fundamental. Step, step, rock,

20:46

step, step, step, step, step,

20:48

step, step, step, step, right,

20:51

back, then left, left, left,

20:53

right, right, left, right, right,

20:55

left, right, right, right, right,

20:58

left, right, right, right, right,

21:00

right, right, right, right, right,

21:02

right. then left. Now spin,

21:05

okay, get that arm up,

21:07

swap positions, spin her around,

21:09

put her on upside down.

21:12

You've got it going, that's

21:14

swing dance, don't forget. There's

21:17

a chain on your pants.

21:19

And so this is actually

21:21

going to make your wedding

21:24

bearable for me. That's

21:26

good. I need that because

21:29

I've been very distracted about

21:31

a big presentation I have

21:33

this weekend. I haven't been

21:36

able to spend any time

21:38

dancing Because I've been rehearsing

21:40

for my big speech Speech

21:43

for your wedding no business

21:45

speech I was wondering if

21:47

I could practice it for

21:50

you guys I

21:56

was thinking about the most fascinating thing over the weekend.

21:58

Isn't it interesting that 9 in

22:00

10 kids say when they

22:02

grow up want to be they want

22:04

to be I'm sorry, but when I

22:06

was a kid, I we used to

22:08

say things like, doctor and nurse. like

22:10

doctor today say, Kids today say and nurse

22:12

Jackie. and So what does that mean?

22:15

Well, it's pretty simple. simple.

22:17

The creator of comedy is

22:19

massively blowing up. Demand is

22:21

in the strat right now. right

22:23

now. No, really, think about it. it. More

22:25

content is being uploaded every day,

22:27

every week, every year, more than ever

22:29

than before. ever than And if we don't

22:31

capitalize on don't capitalize water.

22:33

we're fishing the water. So give

22:35

you my presentation on three

22:38

life and death advice to making

22:40

this to making this crazy crater a

22:42

comedy. Rule number one. Don't ask

22:44

for permission, demand for

22:46

permission. It's quite It's quite hilarious

22:48

when you think about it. it. In

22:50

In today's global space, the chips are

22:52

in your your hand. But the cars are

22:54

in are in mine. Now you're probably thinking right

22:56

now, right what gives you the right

22:58

to be so wrong? be so wrong? Well, unlike

23:00

our alleged leaders in this country,

23:03

I like to roll up my sleeves

23:05

and get dirty in the hand. get

23:07

Pretty surprising, Pretty surprising, let me tell you a

23:09

little story. you a little story. who knows

23:11

me knows I got my start in

23:13

music videos. I have one job, take the

23:15

lens cap off a camera. off a camera.

23:17

I the director on I be

23:19

the director? Can I

23:21

do the choreography? The The director yells cut!

23:23

He looks over at me, roll his eye He

23:26

looks over at me, roll his left the

23:28

damn lens cap on. He leaned real close and whisper

23:30

in my ear. Maximize He leaned

23:32

real close and whispered in my ear. on,

23:34

I never ask another question again,

23:36

which leads me to rule number two. What's

23:38

the most fascinating thing in the that

23:41

moment on, I never ask another

23:43

question again. it. Think Which leads me

23:45

to it. Think about it. Think was the

23:47

most fascinating thing in the world? Think about

23:49

it. Think about it. about it.

23:51

Think about it. Your values

23:53

are your value, but

23:56

when revenue rules

23:58

all, e-value 8, Everything. My

24:00

manager says I said the craziest

24:02

thing happened to me earlier this

24:05

year. We're at top golf hitting

24:07

dingers like a damn label went

24:09

off. Now me, normally I'm a

24:11

pool shark, but there's something about

24:14

golf that just get me. I

24:16

guess at the end of the

24:18

day they're both silly little game

24:20

with a wooden stick and tiny

24:23

ball. Now my manager says to

24:25

me, do you remember when you

24:27

were a little boy and you

24:29

asked my wife? Mommy, why is

24:31

traditional media dead? My dad's my

24:34

manager switching to my nine iron.

24:36

I laugh as he recount this

24:38

tale I've always been diagnosed with

24:40

curious mind My mother responded sometimes

24:43

the corpse is thicker than the

24:45

grave. I know exactly what she

24:47

meant if I'm not constantly changing

24:49

who I am to adopt I

24:51

might as well be fishing the

24:54

water The manager of chop golf

24:56

walked up and said boys, that's

24:58

enough you hit all the balls

25:00

I put my iron back in

25:03

my bag, I knew there was

25:05

a problem with my short game,

25:07

jokingly. Well, I'm getting delight, so

25:09

I'll wrap off with rule number

25:11

three. Don't be a business model,

25:14

be a business hyphen model. I've

25:16

actually been wanting to have his

25:18

conversation for a long time. You

25:20

may disagree with me, but at

25:23

the end of the day, at

25:25

least nine in ten adults crank

25:27

it once. Not everything has to

25:29

be about sex, but sex has

25:31

to be about everything. I hate

25:34

to be crashed but you can't

25:36

spell creator or comedy without come

25:38

money. Crazy, no? Now I won't

25:40

give you tips of do's and

25:43

don'ts, but if you rewatch all

25:45

my videos, it's pretty obvious what

25:47

are the do's and who are

25:49

the don'ts. That's my time. Enjoy

25:52

yours while you still have it.

25:56

What do we

25:59

think? I

26:01

spent the whole time...

26:03

I don't know why.

26:05

This is... This is...

26:07

This would be very

26:09

sad, but I was

26:11

thinking... It would just

26:13

be so crazy if

26:15

Kevin got divorced. Yeah,

26:17

that's fucked up, man.

26:19

That's so bad to

26:22

think about. I don't

26:24

know what to do.

26:26

Yeah, because whatever would

26:28

have had to happen,

26:30

like, for that to

26:32

take place, you just

26:34

like, the rest of

26:36

the picture is pretty

26:38

grim. Yeah, that would

26:40

make me really sad.

26:42

Because a little year

26:45

old getting married is

26:47

cute. Yeah, that's very

26:49

cute. Very funny. It's

26:51

very cute. Yeah, when

26:53

you're getting formally divorced

26:55

is like really bad.

26:57

I think, um, at

26:59

the beginning I was

27:01

like, okay, kind of

27:03

funny. Then through the

27:05

middle, so, you know,

27:08

towards the end of

27:10

slide too, I was

27:12

just totally done with

27:14

it. Yeah. Just a

27:16

really powerful lesson that

27:18

it ended up, it

27:20

ended up getting me

27:22

back in all the

27:24

way in. I think

27:26

it's a really good

27:28

presentation. I think it's

27:31

a really good presentation.

27:33

I think. Things like

27:35

iron iron and chop

27:37

golf. Yes, it was

27:39

a really excellent presentation.

27:41

There's something to be

27:43

learned here, but this

27:45

between this presentation and

27:47

where the potty at.

27:49

And it has to

27:51

do with length diminishing

27:54

returns. working on something

27:56

and your instinct is

27:58

to, or you come

28:00

to a point where

28:02

to move forward on

28:04

it, you have to

28:06

call someone on the

28:08

phone, or even send

28:10

them a text. Does

28:12

communicate at all? You

28:14

need to stop and

28:16

cancel the project. Take

28:19

a step back, it's

28:21

time to listen. Yeah,

28:23

I think that's, I

28:25

think that's a really

28:27

great lesson. Because this,

28:29

I think about this,

28:31

which I experienced all

28:33

of, and I think

28:35

about where the potty

28:37

at, which I only

28:39

sort of checked out.

28:42

Yes, I ended up

28:44

staying with this much

28:46

longer than I did

28:48

where the potty at.

28:50

I finished the entire

28:52

thing. Interesting. I noticed

28:54

the art, the visuals

28:56

were really nice. You

28:59

had an image from Watchmojo,

29:01

distributing service. Couldn't crop the

29:04

whole thing. So it says,

29:06

it was kind of hard

29:09

to tell what it was,

29:11

because it says Watchmudge. There

29:14

weren't that many of the

29:16

letters in there. And Jake

29:18

Paul, Pewty Pie, of course,

29:21

and Ed Sheeran. Yeah,

29:24

kind of the three faces of the

29:26

creator economy. The creator economy is exploding.

29:28

Let's talk about the economy. Before we

29:30

move all the way along, go ahead.

29:33

Go ahead. You were hitting Dinger's like

29:35

a label went off. I was saying

29:37

Dinger's like a damn label went off.

29:39

Yeah, what does that mean actually? Nothing

29:41

but hits. Oh, a label. Okay, you

29:43

were hitting dingers like a damn label

29:45

went off. Okay, not your was at

29:47

top golf not you were like a

29:49

damn label went off not you were

29:51

like banging out hits,

29:54

like like a went

29:56

off. You were hitting

29:58

were hitting a damn like

30:00

a off. He was

30:02

hitting dingers and

30:04

the dingers were nothing

30:06

but hits. and the

30:09

dingers were nothing but hits.

30:11

good I'm thinking you

30:13

were you for asking. I also Because

30:15

I also was confused, now I realize it's

30:17

even better than I thought. than I

30:19

thought. So it's good to dig in

30:21

on some of that stuff. of that stuff. Ads. One

30:24

of One of our ads got canceled.

30:26

Well this is what I wanted to say

30:28

to say. So one of the

30:30

ads got canceled. That's supposed

30:32

to for everybody

30:35

than they did it for everybody?

30:38

Yeah. What do you mean they did it

30:40

for everybody, why? it for my phone. Why?

30:43

'clock. phone, three o'clock. Text message from

30:45

Text message from

30:47

that hose. message

30:49

from that host. Goodbye

30:52

fresh? I got text to

30:54

Anya. Hey, just just checking in.

30:56

What's going on? on? Hmm,

30:59

moving things moving

31:02

things around. the

31:04

trash. into the trash. moving

31:07

a few things we're

31:09

just moving a few things around into

31:11

the trash trash. You know what you can tell him? you

31:14

Tell him this. them? Tell

31:16

them this. I'm back

31:19

in on blue apron.

31:22

I'm I'm doing it. I'm using it.

31:24

we When we had the we we

31:26

read the old ads, confession time, a

31:28

lot of that was fake. That's

31:30

why I made Chef Kevin about it. I

31:32

wasn't doing it. And when I

31:34

had done it, I wasn't crazy about

31:36

it. I thought the prep time

31:38

took longer than they were saying. time

31:40

I didn't love the food when they

31:42

took a big swing at the food when

31:45

they took a big swing at like adventurous cuisines. I

31:47

thought they just didn't really have

31:49

it figured out yet. out yet. It's really good, I'm

31:51

good. we're doing it we're doing it twice

31:53

a week, I'm enjoying it. feels It

31:55

simpler, feels like stuff is more their stuff

31:57

is more accurate and their recipes

31:59

taste better. and so you tell hello

32:01

fresh you tell him goodbye fresh

32:04

and tell blue apron hello apron

32:06

and and I'll say this too

32:08

hey did you see that I've

32:10

tried to have a little fun

32:12

with our advertising yes he asked

32:15

us if he so we've been

32:17

approved and spoiler you know and

32:19

you guys stop listening now if

32:21

you don't want to get spoiled

32:23

we've been approved for Claritin, the

32:26

allergy pill company, and he asked

32:28

if anyone in my household suffered

32:30

from seasonal allergies, and whether we

32:32

would, and he said you will

32:34

be required to give a personal

32:37

endorsement for this, so I have

32:39

to know you really used it.

32:41

And I told him to tell

32:43

the company that if they wanted

32:45

to send me a Claritin D,

32:48

that I would ingest it live

32:50

on cam. I'd be

32:52

willing to do that to

32:55

like stream the results as

32:57

it happened. I'll let you

32:59

put the camera up my

33:01

fucking nose dude. We can

33:04

really see what's good because

33:06

I do have allergies and

33:08

I do use that stuff

33:11

sometimes. This is a this

33:13

is a just a gigantic

33:15

fish on the line for

33:18

us by revenue. I would

33:20

say this is our biggest

33:22

advertiser by maybe 100 million

33:24

times. Yeah. Bayer? Bayer Pharmaceuticals?

33:27

I was in a print

33:29

ad for them years ago.

33:31

You know about that? That

33:34

I'm a model? Ooh. I

33:36

am an actual fucking model.

33:38

Can you show what you

33:40

did? What I can tell

33:43

you. Whatever pose and face

33:45

you did? I

33:48

will be totally genuine. I

33:50

don't 100% remember exactly what

33:52

the pose was. I know

33:54

it was the kind of

33:57

thing that would be like

33:59

on a subway car and

34:01

that. Whatever their product was

34:03

that was helping me manage

34:05

my diabetes had me feeling

34:07

so fucking confident and good

34:09

that there was like a

34:11

real strut even though I

34:14

was holding still There was

34:16

this kind of fucking swagger

34:18

and strut to me like

34:20

I was just owning the

34:22

whole fucking street with my

34:24

moves and I and I

34:26

was like The photo is

34:28

a still photo, but there

34:31

was movement in it because

34:33

this product they had some

34:35

kind of monitor or something

34:37

maybe that I was using

34:39

to know what my like

34:41

Glucose levels were or something

34:43

But this thing they had

34:45

that bare made for me.

34:48

Oh Mama did it have

34:50

me feeling good. I was

34:52

probably I was probably about

34:54

to know someone carnally And

34:57

that pick you're on your

35:00

way. Check the glucose monitor.

35:02

Ooh sugar's right. Oh, or

35:04

no. Oh, nope. I need

35:07

a little more sugar. Mm-hmm.

35:09

Yeah. Something sweet. Did they

35:12

play music on set? During

35:14

when I was taking the

35:17

picture? Yeah. Just to like

35:19

get you in the right

35:21

mindset? Nah. That's all up

35:24

here. The music

35:26

is all here. You

35:29

played music? Oh, there

35:31

was music playing. You

35:33

bet there believe it.

35:36

It was fucking. Rockin'

35:38

and a rolling. We

35:40

get it almost every

35:43

night. When that moon

35:45

gets big and bright,

35:48

it's supernatural life. Everybody's

35:50

dancing in the moonlight.

35:52

Dancing in the moonlight.

35:56

I gotta add that

35:58

to the playlist. Hollywood

36:02

Handbook. Let's talk rocket money.

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36:22

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36:24

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36:26

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36:28

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36:33

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36:35

found the subscription, not only canceled all

36:37

but one, then checked in with me

36:39

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the one, which I thought I did

36:44

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36:46

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36:48

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36:51

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36:53

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36:55

in each box and whether the creams

36:57

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37:00

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37:02

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37:06

rocket money convinced me that I'm enough

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and conditions apply. apply. Hi

40:00

Grace so I'm recording so

40:03

we don't have haze. So

40:05

what I'm gonna do is obviously

40:07

I'm in my office I'm gonna

40:09

send you a zoom link Kevin

40:12

and I will prep while you

40:14

hopefully come and join you can

40:16

join from your computer you don't

40:19

have to have your camera and

40:21

I know you don't want to

40:23

be on camera. We're going to

40:25

sort of try to strategize a

40:28

way to kind of approach. I

40:30

know you don't listen to the

40:32

show Hollywood Handbook. You don't like

40:35

what you have heard sort of

40:37

involuntarily, but we're going to try

40:39

to see if we can kind

40:42

of get you on board. Okay,

40:44

you're sending me a link? Yeah,

40:46

Kevin's going to send you or

40:49

I'll send you a zoom link.

40:51

I'll just text it to you

40:53

right now. Okay. All right. See

40:55

you soon. So far

40:58

so good. Yeah, no, this is

41:00

going way better than I thought.

41:02

So we can't It's a tricky

41:04

situation because we we can't Really

41:06

pitch her what the show Actually

41:08

is yeah, because she's not gonna

41:10

like it No, you know what

41:13

I mean? Like she's correct in

41:15

not listening to it. Yeah, but

41:17

I'd love to get the numbers

41:19

up me too especially a Sort

41:21

of a power listener like this

41:23

she's kind of known for like

41:25

her recommendations and things like this

41:28

good taste. Yeah Yeah, and so

41:30

Any version of her listening even

41:32

if it's temporary or even if

41:34

she starts pretending to listen. Yeah,

41:36

like if she could feel that

41:38

kind of social pressure, you know

41:40

what someone asked like have you

41:42

like? seen this movie or whatever

41:45

and you either go like oh,

41:47

it's on my list or you

41:49

go like like I like yeah

41:51

I saw I started it like

41:53

you know something I've heard of

41:55

it yeah like you don't want

41:57

to be out like yeah even

41:59

if I could get her to

42:02

say I heard of it like

42:04

that's such a great that's a

42:06

huge example I know that would

42:08

be huge for us maybe there's

42:10

some other shows we could kind

42:12

of pretend to be or like

42:14

popular styles right now well and

42:16

here's another thing like the show

42:19

is fluid I actually think that

42:21

we could adjust to what she

42:23

wishes it was. We're not asking

42:25

her to hear the whole back

42:27

catalog. Is she in the waiting

42:29

room? She's in the waiting room.

42:31

Should I let her in? Let

42:34

her in. Okay. Grace is connecting

42:36

to audio. This is exciting. Hi.

42:38

Can you hear me? Hi. Hi

42:40

Grace. I can hear you. Grace.

42:42

Kevin probably needs you to record

42:44

like a voice memo on your

42:46

phone or something. Is that right,

42:48

Kevin? the backup of just her

42:51

audio. So you don't have to,

42:53

Grace. No, not the kind of

42:55

treatment I get. Yeah, I mean,

42:57

if you want to do it.

42:59

Or fluid, Grace, whatever, whatever is

43:01

cool to you is. Yeah, the

43:03

show's flexible. I was just talking

43:05

about that, that the show doesn't

43:08

have like one way that it

43:10

has to be. Like, that's one

43:12

of the cool things, I think.

43:14

So Grace, do you want to,

43:16

and you want. Zero visual record

43:18

of you being here. Do you

43:20

want to say hi and then

43:22

go off video or you just

43:25

don't want to be in and

43:27

it's fine? You probably send us

43:29

a photo actually think that we

43:31

could adjust to what she wishes

43:33

it was. We're not asking her

43:35

to hear the whole back catalog.

43:37

Is she in the waiting room?

43:39

She's in the waiting room. Should

43:42

I let her in? Okay. Grace

43:44

is connecting to audio. This is

43:46

exciting. Hi. Can you hear me?

43:48

Hi. Hi Grace. I can hear

43:50

you. Grace, Kevin probably needs you

43:52

to record like a voice memo

43:54

on your phone or something. Is

43:57

that right Kevin? I could. the

43:59

backup of just her audio. So

44:01

you don't have to, Grace. And

44:03

whatever you want. Not the kind

44:05

of treatment I get. Yeah, I

44:07

mean, if you want to do

44:09

it. Or fluid, Grace, whatever, whatever

44:11

is cool to you. Yeah, the

44:14

show's flexible. I was just talking

44:16

about that, that the show doesn't

44:18

have like one way that it

44:20

has to be. Like, that's one

44:22

of the cool things, I think.

44:24

So Grace, do you want to,

44:26

and you want. Zero visual record

44:28

of you being here. Do you

44:31

want to say hi and then

44:33

go off video or you just

44:35

don't want to be it and

44:37

it's fine? You probably send us

44:39

a photo of you that you

44:41

like and that can be your

44:43

zoom square. I just don't know

44:45

like what is in, okay wait,

44:48

oh, what's in the room? You

44:50

left the chair in here. Yes,

44:52

I shot my chair in there.

44:54

Everybody guilty, I'm the sloppy husband.

44:56

Okay, wait here, does this one?

44:58

We had a meeting to. Oh,

45:00

cool. Hey. Hi. Hi. Hey, babe.

45:03

Oh, you don't have to stay

45:05

out. Grace, go back off, just

45:07

thought you want to come on

45:09

and say hi. Okay, hi, I'm

45:11

going back off. So, now we

45:13

have a sense, right? We have

45:15

the vibe. So

45:17

Grace if you could just give

45:20

us a little bit of guidance

45:22

like in terms of you know

45:25

I was saying to Kevin of

45:27

course what I'd love to do

45:29

is get into a little of

45:32

the meat of the idea yeah

45:34

so what so um you know

45:36

are you know are you talking

45:39

to the dog you're talking I

45:41

can hear you talking one second

45:43

honey's barking So

45:48

this is honestly good better

45:50

than I thought if I

45:52

could just say it's our

45:54

best pro version No, I'm

45:56

here now I'm here,

45:58

I'm here. here.

46:01

We We don't have Hayes right now,

46:03

now. I'll but I'll say something Grace,

46:05

is sometimes we've talked, Hayes and I and I

46:07

have talked about how our wives

46:09

do listen to to podcast not it's not,

46:11

not our podcast. then Hayes said, does

46:13

she listen to any she listen to any like

46:16

Friends of yours. of yours? I said, said,

46:18

she she she will listen to when he

46:20

has his wife on. I wonder

46:22

if that's a hint. a hint. So I think I

46:24

I think I probably said that within the month.

46:26

month. And then tonight, of

46:28

course, we have no course, we have

46:30

no haze. Yeah. And, and

46:33

damned if my little little

46:35

perk up and say. perk up

46:37

and say, need someone. need

46:39

someone. Yeah. Uh, that's

46:41

cool. Is that, Is that, I'm

46:44

sorry, am I your little helper or is

46:46

Kevin your little helper? Kevin, your little

46:48

have two little helpers can't. Yeah,

46:50

I can't have two little

46:52

helpers. Okay. I you

46:54

can. kind of dig into

46:57

here here we want want

46:59

to we want you you to listen to

47:01

this show and we actually want it to be a

47:03

positive experience for you to not a to like. make

47:06

you endure the show. trying to

47:08

you could give me an idea

47:10

the show yeah if you could give me

47:12

think the show is? you think the

47:14

show is and possibly what

47:17

possibly what to you about

47:19

it at this point at this to

47:21

you about this point at this point

47:23

this point. point And then maybe

47:25

we can then maybe we going through

47:28

a little bit of of start going through

47:30

a little bit of the show. of You

47:32

can stop us and we can kind

47:34

of tell you like how we could adjust

47:36

it to make it something that would

47:38

be interesting to you because I was telling

47:40

Kevin before that you are. that you're

47:42

of a of known for you're kind of known

47:45

for having like good recommendations. You really champion

47:47

things that you like. you if there's a

47:49

show that you're watching. that you're watching.

47:51

If there's a show that I'm watching

47:53

that I just think is think is okay,

47:55

I I will hear you in

47:57

conversation with people we hardly

47:59

know going, going... Sean loves that. Yeah, I

48:01

do that. So like, so I

48:04

know so I know that you

48:06

like are a really strong advocate

48:08

for things you enjoy and and

48:10

we want to make this one

48:13

of those things. You know, I

48:15

think now it's like, it's almost

48:17

like too late. Like the catalog

48:20

is too bit, you know, like,

48:22

but this is what I'm saying.

48:24

Like we're not asking you to

48:26

go back to the beginning. Because

48:29

we don't you know that's great

48:31

I love that there's people who

48:33

like what we've been doing for

48:35

a long time I love that

48:38

there's people who who don't anymore

48:40

and talk about how Kevin ruined

48:42

the show or such and such

48:44

happen to the show or you

48:47

know we can kill the back

48:49

catalog too I can delete like

48:51

500 episodes right now if that

48:54

would help Kevin can erase those

48:56

because I don't want you to

48:58

feel any kind of pressure but

49:00

like anybody that we could get

49:03

to jump on now moving forward

49:05

and could... I would happily pretend

49:07

that this is the first episode

49:09

of this show. Yeah. Maybe you

49:12

could give me a list of

49:14

like five episodes to try. You

49:16

want me to give you one

49:18

to try? Well, have you had...

49:21

Have you had anyone recommend the

49:23

show to you? Yeah, Paul Sims

49:25

recommended the show to me like

49:28

two days ago. Holy shit, that's

49:30

a fucking power player in the

49:32

industry. Like, or she texted me

49:34

about it like yesterday and I

49:37

said, I'm, I can't break my

49:39

streak of never having listened to

49:41

enough. We had a comment today,

49:43

Kevin, you probably saw this. There's

49:46

a comment online about our live

49:48

show that went up with the

49:50

dropout folks and it said the

49:52

comment that I always loved to

49:55

hear. Best episode these guys have

49:57

done in a very very long

49:59

time And by the way I

50:02

thought it was a good episode

50:04

Yeah. But it wasn't like so

50:06

incredible. Water in the desert. Yeah.

50:08

Sean, Sean, a serious question. Yeah.

50:11

Okay, I'm me. I'm me. Everything

50:13

about his name. But I'm a

50:15

huge Hollywood handbook fan. Like, I

50:17

don't think you want that. But

50:20

like, what do you, what do

50:22

you think that is about me?

50:24

Grace, do you want to tell

50:26

people like, how did it come

50:29

up the other day? We were

50:31

on a walk, I remember where

50:33

we were, and you said something,

50:36

it was like a, you were

50:38

teasing me as you do, like

50:40

a, you know, if we walk

50:42

into a restaurant and you go

50:45

like, do you think anyone in

50:47

here recognizes, like, do you think

50:49

anyone here, follows, you know, follows

50:51

you on Twitter, or something would

50:54

be the question. How many handbook

50:56

heads? But it was like, the

50:58

joke was like, what if so

51:00

and so, someone that we saw

51:03

or knew, like, oh, can you

51:05

imagine if they recognized you from

51:07

Snapple Cap facts? So of course

51:09

a video, no one, I think

51:12

who listens to Handbook will know,

51:14

but it's an old sketch video.

51:16

But you remember what I'm talking

51:19

about? Yeah, I know where we

51:21

were too. We were by that

51:23

house that has that weird like

51:25

basement. I've never been in that

51:28

basement. No, I've never been in

51:30

it, but there's like that. That's

51:32

your fucking boyfriend's house. That's what

51:34

Bosch did. That's what Bosch did.

51:37

Where our dog, well, when we're

51:39

out to walk, does like, there'll

51:41

be a specific house that he

51:43

just starts trying to run up

51:46

the stairs of, like every time

51:48

we're on the walk, like we

51:50

walk by eight similar staircases, but

51:53

he goes up, but he goes

51:55

up, and so. I always say

51:57

that that's like where Grace is

51:59

having her affair. She just walks.

52:02

She goes on these long like,

52:04

you know, 90 minute walks by

52:06

herself. Oh, she just walks. some

52:08

couple blocks down. Hanks out, you

52:11

know, get their kicks. But you

52:13

were saying, and of course, Snappelvax

52:15

for Context is a video sketch

52:17

that I made from like 2007,

52:20

directed by Will Hines for UCB

52:22

Comedy, and you mentioned that as

52:24

like, imagine they know you from

52:27

Snappelvax or something. And then I

52:29

said to you, is that my.

52:31

your favorite thing I've ever done

52:33

like that's your favorite piece of

52:36

content or like comedy I've ever

52:38

made and with no has you

52:40

were like yeah yeah before we

52:42

well before we met like just

52:45

I mean I didn't like nothing

52:47

I've done in the I didn't

52:49

know it before we met you

52:51

showed it to me Yeah, proud.

52:54

Just want to be clear on

52:56

that, that it wasn't like... No,

52:58

I know, but... But, it's just

53:01

like, you did say it was,

53:03

it was your favorite thing, basically

53:05

I've ever been involved in. Yeah,

53:07

there was another thing that's... And

53:10

so that's a long... Oh, it

53:12

was that, it was this, yeah,

53:14

we were talking about that and

53:16

the, um, the commercial that you're

53:19

in, the car commercial. Yes, which

53:21

also was before we met the...

53:23

Iron Man 2 LP Ally commercial

53:25

for people that want to search

53:28

it. Commercial Stars, me, and then

53:30

the two of the other people

53:32

in the commercial are Lamar Morris

53:35

and Kyle Mooney. Yeah. Nice. So

53:37

I've been, so I did three

53:39

cell phone commercials. Yeah. One of

53:41

them the co-star was Bedswartz. Yeah.

53:44

One of them the co-stars were

53:46

Lamar Morris and Kyle Mooney. And

53:48

one of them the co-star was

53:50

this guy named John Boyd who

53:53

is now like the second lead

53:55

on the CBS procedural FBI that's

53:57

been on for like eight seasons.

53:59

So a lot of very established

54:02

actors have had to watch me

54:04

do a cell phone commercial and

54:06

then and then sort of I

54:09

guess learned what not to do

54:11

and gone on to great success.

54:13

Yeah. But we do want you

54:15

to end on the show. So

54:18

you're saying people recommend it to

54:20

you and you don't want to

54:22

break your, it's like a point

54:24

of pride that you don't listen.

54:27

But what is it that you

54:29

think? Yeah. I can't, I can't

54:31

be responsible for the full catalog.

54:33

No one's asking you to be

54:36

responsible for the catalog. I know,

54:38

but like if it's like, if

54:40

people say to me like, oh,

54:43

do you listen to Hollywood handbook.

54:45

and then I go no that's

54:47

it if I say oh you're

54:49

afraid of having to talk about

54:52

it I can't yeah I can't

54:54

engage first of all yeah no

54:56

I don't okay I don't I

54:58

don't I don't I don't I

55:01

don't I just I think it's

55:03

better is there a kind of

55:05

podcast I would I could do

55:07

that you would Like and listen

55:10

to did you listen to subtitles

55:12

on when I did it? Yeah,

55:14

I did I did listen to

55:17

subtitles on Okay, but all partially

55:19

because you had my friends on

55:21

that That's true, but like do

55:23

you Think I would like you

55:26

more if I listen to Hollywood

55:28

Handbook or less? I Think this

55:30

is the same reason Leah stopped

55:32

listening Okay It's that's really good

55:35

question the thing is you would

55:37

like me less But I don't

55:39

think that one who listens to

55:41

Hollywood him book would like me

55:44

less I know, but you would

55:46

like me less because you would

55:48

not enjoy it. So how do

55:51

I how do I help you?

55:53

Yeah Do you want to hear

55:55

the theme song? We never played

55:57

the theme song. Do you want

56:00

to just hear it? Well, you

56:02

know, it's so funny is that

56:04

Annalice wrote the theme song my

56:06

friend. No, another friend. And then

56:09

apparently you had an episode talking

56:11

about how you were going to

56:13

replace her theme song. Well, yes,

56:15

this is the one that Paul

56:18

told you to listen to listen

56:20

to. Which is funny. He was

56:22

very positive about this episode and

56:25

he told me that he listened

56:27

to it twice and Then we've

56:29

been getting better on the clips

56:31

the clips have been getting better.

56:34

Do you watch the clips Grace

56:36

when they come across? Do they

56:38

show up on your Instagram or

56:40

anything? Yeah, but you show them

56:43

to me So but you know

56:45

I do sometimes I think to

56:47

myself when they come because sometimes

56:49

they do come up on my

56:52

takeoff and I go I should

56:54

watch this to help them but

56:56

then I don't want it in

56:59

my algorithm Like not because I

57:01

like I just catch 22 You

57:03

know like I think like oh

57:05

I should give them the life

57:08

But you absolutely should I know

57:10

but like I see I just

57:12

I see them because you show

57:14

them but That's actually that's actually

57:17

no I do it. I know

57:19

I do it I do it

57:21

I do it I do it

57:23

I do it I do it

57:26

I do it I do it

57:28

I do it I have a

57:30

question actually I've actually never asked

57:33

you this So sometimes we'll be

57:35

like sitting on the couch looking

57:37

at TikTok and like you can

57:39

probably hear what I'm watching because

57:42

I listen to my phone letter

57:44

than you. Yeah. Do you ever

57:46

hear me skip a Hollywood handbook?

57:48

Did you talk? I don't think

57:51

so. I know my voice anywhere.

57:53

Okay, because like I've done it

57:55

in front of you and then

57:57

I get like really nervous about

58:00

it. Like, oh, I should go

58:02

back. No, I'm working so hard

58:04

to not hear what's going on.

58:07

song clip 45 times in a

58:09

row. But I'm not watching. Just

58:11

like different people doing the same,

58:13

like whatever trend. Yeah. And then

58:16

it'll be like some idiot talking

58:18

not me one that you do

58:20

listen to But like I don't

58:22

really get back slips like that's

58:25

not I don't really not really

58:27

Okay, well That's interesting. I do

58:29

think that you should watch it.

58:31

I don't think we would wreck

58:34

your algorithm. I really don't but

58:36

I don't think you would wreck

58:38

it, but What are you afraid

58:41

of you're gonna see Andrew Santino

58:43

on there? No, I don't think

58:45

it would Why would watching your

58:47

podcast bring me to Andrew Santina?

58:50

I don't know because he's because

58:52

he's another comedic figure who talks

58:54

out a microphone. Do you think

58:56

that's a pretty big jump-craced? You

58:59

don't know. I mean, you think

59:01

I'm giving myself too much credit

59:03

thinking that listening to my show?

59:05

No. Anywhere in the realm that

59:08

the that the vent diagram of

59:10

like Cetino fan, you know, you

59:12

know who I weirdly get? John

59:15

Bernthal. Yeah, well, he's the realist

59:17

motherfucker on TikTok. He has a

59:19

he has a podcast, and it's

59:21

called real ones, and with the

59:24

guys he's talking to man. No

59:26

one nods harder than John Bernethal,

59:28

and he's listening to someone lay

59:30

it down. I think that's our

59:33

issue, Sean. You need to get

59:35

closer to the camera. Like your

59:37

head needs to be a lot

59:39

close. Yeah, and that phase two,

59:42

a lot more intense. Breaking it

59:44

down. I have to zoom in

59:46

way more on the camera. Brother,

59:49

that's real. He says that? Mm-hmm.

59:51

Even guy like me could do

59:53

TNT D&T? We'll see. Kevin here's

59:55

the thing I was so angry

1:00:00

But man, I was I was

1:00:02

only hurting myself. myself. All that

1:00:05

All that anger was like me drinking poison. poison.

1:00:08

That biker put his

1:00:10

That biker put his hand on my

1:00:12

shoulder. and he said he said

1:00:14

to it doesn't have to be this

1:00:16

doesn't have to be this way, kid. got to

1:00:19

say thank I never got to say thank you

1:00:21

to him, he exploded. It's

1:00:23

like powerful stories, powerful

1:00:25

stories that stories that,

1:00:27

um, I I think all happened. Grace,

1:00:30

have you have you listened to more

1:00:32

episodes of Hollywood Handbook or maybe don't?

1:00:34

Handbook or have not listened

1:00:36

to I have episodes of either of them. to

1:00:39

any episodes of either of them.

1:00:41

so we're on an even.

1:00:43

So you like me and

1:00:45

Kevin the same. even, in

1:00:48

terms of the content we

1:00:50

create? Well, what's maybe same. OK.

1:00:52

the So I have that

1:00:54

up on you. create? That was

1:00:56

maybe don't? Okay, I did. that ago.

1:00:59

you. That was a... I guess no, to answer

1:01:01

your question, your question, they Oh. They

1:01:03

the name to the name to definitely

1:01:05

don't. It was Kevin was

1:01:08

song. Yeah, in like 2018,

1:01:10

19. I never watched, I

1:01:12

never never watched, I never heard, I didn't know

1:01:14

about that one. that we didn't

1:01:16

have clips. we didn't have clips.

1:01:18

Yeah. Yeah, the clips, the

1:01:21

clips are fire lately. I

1:01:23

fire you should watch them. Shout

1:01:25

them. I have shown you should Yeah,

1:01:27

not as many as I've had

1:01:29

to watch. have I have shown

1:01:31

you some but I, no. Yeah,

1:01:34

not but that's the

1:01:36

difference. I've had to watch

1:01:38

of me, but what

1:01:40

I but I know Well,

1:01:42

yeah, but that's

1:01:45

a damn clip show all

1:01:47

day difference I don't know what

1:01:49

that means. know what that

1:01:51

What other podcasts pop

1:01:53

up on your podcasts

1:01:55

pop up on

1:01:57

your algorithm?

1:02:00

Oh, new heights. Oh, yeah. Traff.

1:02:02

What are you doing? Are

1:02:04

you doing, are you doing,

1:02:06

is Giggly Squad in the

1:02:08

algorithm? Well, but Giggly Squad

1:02:10

doesn't really. Trash Tuesday? Oh,

1:02:12

sometimes Trash Tuesday comes on

1:02:14

my, yeah, sometimes they do.

1:02:16

Yeah. Yeah. They've got it

1:02:18

wired, man. Oh, you know

1:02:20

what comes on my, on

1:02:22

my algorithm a lot, which

1:02:24

I actually think is really

1:02:27

funny. Best friends. Is that

1:02:29

what this called? It's Nicole

1:02:31

Bayer and her friend. Yeah,

1:02:33

and Sashire. Yeah, Sashire. Sashire.

1:02:35

Very charming. They're very funny. Good.

1:02:37

It's, it's, it's feels, that feels

1:02:39

close to what we're doing in

1:02:41

a way. Best friends and bad

1:02:43

friends, somewhere in the middle. Yeah.

1:02:45

But they're being, but they're being,

1:02:47

they aren't, they're themselves. Right? Yeah.

1:02:50

Yeah. No, they are. They are.

1:02:52

They are themselves. They are themselves.

1:02:54

Yeah. But one of there was

1:02:56

someone who was like themselves, but

1:02:58

then also something worse. Yeah. And

1:03:00

they were going in and out

1:03:02

of it. And it wasn't ever

1:03:04

clear when it would start or

1:03:06

stop and why. Couldn't that be

1:03:09

a show? But anyway, the theme

1:03:11

song one, to say it, we

1:03:13

made that. episode which was never

1:03:15

really tell at least we were

1:03:17

never really gonna change the themes

1:03:19

I didn't even tell her that

1:03:21

I didn't even tell her actually

1:03:23

just a funny idea and it

1:03:25

was a way into like maybe

1:03:28

we'll do some music stuff which

1:03:30

I I always like I always

1:03:32

kind of want to do it

1:03:34

and I like you guys were

1:03:36

good at it and as evidence

1:03:38

by the I don't think so

1:03:40

as evidence by the clips afterwards

1:03:42

like the clips came out it

1:03:44

was us kind of try to

1:03:47

make up these songs and and

1:03:49

and I'm I like the clips

1:03:51

and I was like, I can't,

1:03:53

I can't approve any of these

1:03:55

like they all are making me

1:03:57

feel ashamed. they're all making me

1:03:59

very embarrassed by the show in

1:04:01

a way that even sometimes doing

1:04:03

like an episode I don't think

1:04:06

is very good doesn't it was

1:04:08

just like a little too raw

1:04:10

very naked yeah I think the

1:04:12

show I think the episode probably

1:04:14

is benefits from in between them

1:04:16

we unpack what worked and didn't

1:04:18

yeah about the song but you

1:04:20

might yeah I mean you wouldn't

1:04:22

like it Paul told you to

1:04:25

listen to it but I think

1:04:27

he was wrong that wasn't one

1:04:29

to start with Is there anything

1:04:31

Grace while you're on here that

1:04:33

you would like the Hollywood Handbook

1:04:35

listening audience to know about me

1:04:37

or that you think they would

1:04:39

like to know? Gosh, I don't

1:04:41

know. Do they want to know

1:04:44

anything about you? Probably not. Come

1:04:46

on, Kevin, edit whatever she says

1:04:48

out. Now that I know this

1:04:50

is the goal. No, no. I

1:04:52

thought it might be something interesting

1:04:54

or... Something interesting? God forbid endearing.

1:04:56

Hmm. I don't know, I'd have

1:04:58

to think, I need more time.

1:05:00

People put food on our table,

1:05:03

these listeners. Oh, you like... The

1:05:05

parasocial relationship they have with me.

1:05:07

It's kind of turning into appetizers.

1:05:09

It's snacks. It's putting clothing on

1:05:11

our children's back. Yeah, it's like

1:05:13

a girl lunch. They're putting girl

1:05:15

lunch on the table. That's a

1:05:17

thing Sean loves, girl lunch. Me

1:05:19

too. I do eat girl lunch.

1:05:21

I do eat girl lunch. I

1:05:24

talked about my girl lunch. Hayes

1:05:26

really attacked me about my girl

1:05:28

lunch because he didn't think that

1:05:30

Granny Smith Apple was the appropriate

1:05:32

choice to have with slices of

1:05:34

sharp cheddar and rye crackers. i

1:05:36

did and then there was a

1:05:38

big discussion grace that you would

1:05:40

have Hey did it last week

1:05:43

and I fucking stood up for

1:05:45

my queen in this episode. It

1:05:47

was on the flagrant ones and

1:05:49

both Hayes and Carl said that

1:05:51

there was no use case for

1:05:53

Swiss cheese. No Swiss cheese was

1:05:55

that there was no there was

1:05:57

no scenario in which Swiss cheese

1:05:59

would be like their choice basically.

1:06:02

They said miss me with the

1:06:04

Swiss me. They said miss me

1:06:06

with the Swiss me. Yeah. Yeah,

1:06:08

well, they're obviously online with my

1:06:10

enemies at Subway who discontinued Swiss

1:06:12

cheese. Well, this is interesting. Somebody

1:06:14

dug up the receipts and said,

1:06:16

oh, really, Hayes, there's no use

1:06:18

for Swiss cheese. And he said,

1:06:21

what about when you did the

1:06:23

Doe Boys subway three episode or

1:06:25

whatever? Probably 17, I don't know

1:06:27

what it's actually. Four years ago.

1:06:29

And I guess he did get

1:06:31

Swiss on his sub. Oh, my

1:06:33

God. See, see, there you go.

1:06:35

We live in the age of

1:06:37

the indelible. I mean, so much

1:06:40

of our lives is just is

1:06:42

recorded for public consumption. And it's

1:06:44

the age of the indelible. The

1:06:46

internet lives forever. Yeah, which is

1:06:48

why I don't really be on

1:06:50

it. Sure, yeah. I just totally

1:06:52

disagree about Swiss cheese, but I'll

1:06:54

take that up. I know I

1:06:56

did too. Grace, I did too.

1:06:59

You know, I talked about our

1:07:01

Trader Joe's turkey burgers and the

1:07:03

Swiss cheese. Yeah, but I don't

1:07:05

think Swiss cheese is like your

1:07:07

default cheese. You just eat the

1:07:09

turkey. Well, yeah. I've always been

1:07:11

a Swiss cheese fan, and I've

1:07:13

always liked it on my sandwiches.

1:07:15

And when it was available at

1:07:18

Subway, guess what cheese I got

1:07:20

at Subway. Is that true? Yes,

1:07:22

I got Swiss cheese. I got

1:07:24

Swiss cheese on my spicy Italian.

1:07:26

Really? I believe. For the listeners.

1:07:28

This is what I live with.

1:07:30

The primary witness to my own

1:07:32

life, not only is unaware. of

1:07:34

like what I'm doing, but doesn't

1:07:37

believe me when I tell them.

1:07:39

I feel like when I feel

1:07:41

like I was like really shaken

1:07:43

to my core when they discontinued

1:07:45

the Swiss cheese, I feel like

1:07:47

you moved on really, like you

1:07:49

were like, okay, problem. But that's,

1:07:51

but, but, but I'd say that

1:07:53

that is actually, that is a,

1:07:56

that is a, an inherent difference

1:07:58

in like primary character. Your relationship

1:08:00

with Subway. And how for the

1:08:02

first... Yeah, so Grace's favorite restaurant

1:08:04

in the world is Subway. Of

1:08:06

course, there's the famous story of

1:08:08

her guy recognized that she walked

1:08:10

into a sweet green one day

1:08:12

and the one behind the counter

1:08:15

was like, you look so familiar

1:08:17

and Grace thought that she was

1:08:19

going to give her a celebrity

1:08:21

look-alike comp. Most frequent one is

1:08:23

Jennifer Garner. And she was like,

1:08:25

here it comes, like, who's she

1:08:27

going to say? And then the

1:08:29

woman went, do you go to

1:08:31

the subway on Beverly? Because she

1:08:34

worked there as well, like Grace

1:08:36

goes to subway so much that

1:08:38

it's like every employee knows her.

1:08:40

You got all those, you got

1:08:42

all the subway employees, they're COVID

1:08:44

vaccines. You signed them all up

1:08:46

and got them all on the

1:08:48

schedule. Do you remember that Grace?

1:08:50

That's awesome. Do you remember that?

1:08:53

And your subway that you frequented?

1:08:55

Yeah. That she was like always

1:08:57

in there with the being like,

1:08:59

okay, so here's the here's the

1:09:01

different locations, like what appointment will

1:09:03

work for you, like got everybody

1:09:05

signed up, because she wanted to,

1:09:07

you know, be able to go

1:09:09

and get her subway again and

1:09:12

have all the employees healthy. Yeah.

1:09:14

Well, if you remember when they

1:09:16

rolled out the vaccines, like one

1:09:18

of the first rounds was for

1:09:20

like restaurant workers. Yeah. Like pretty

1:09:22

early, like six months earlier than.

1:09:24

the average person. And so I

1:09:26

said to my friend, Alfonso, who's

1:09:28

the manager at the subway, I

1:09:31

said, I can get you and

1:09:33

all your coworkers vaccine appointments. And

1:09:35

we did. So that's the level

1:09:37

of relationship that Chris has. One

1:09:39

time I didn't go because I

1:09:41

had COVID for like 10 days,

1:09:43

this was two years ago, when

1:09:45

he texted me and asked me

1:09:47

where I was. Oh my gosh.

1:09:50

Wow, I didn't know that. So

1:09:52

she goes all the time. So

1:09:54

that's the level of loyalty that

1:09:56

she has. I, so I worked

1:09:58

at a dry cleaner for about

1:10:00

four years on and off. in

1:10:02

my early 20s in Cheshire Connecticut

1:10:04

and it was in a like

1:10:06

Plaza like a strip mall type

1:10:09

Plaza and the storefront right next

1:10:11

door was a subway and at

1:10:13

one point my friendship was the

1:10:15

manager of the subway and then

1:10:17

his friend John was the manager

1:10:19

of the subway and they were

1:10:21

buddies and so I could eat

1:10:23

lunch for free at subway every

1:10:25

day and so every single day

1:10:28

that I worked I went to

1:10:30

subway and I ate like the

1:10:32

thing that I liked every day

1:10:34

for months and then I started

1:10:36

being like okay I'll eat this

1:10:38

variation or like these two or

1:10:40

three other things and then I

1:10:42

started just getting crazy on the

1:10:44

menu and being like I guess

1:10:46

I'm gonna try the fucking barbecue

1:10:49

pork sandwich because like I'm just

1:10:51

like I can't I can't eat

1:10:53

and it all started to taste

1:10:55

the same to me and then

1:10:57

like the smell in there of

1:10:59

the bread because it was years

1:11:01

of sure I was eating it

1:11:03

like five days a week and

1:11:05

then I just was like I

1:11:08

can't eat subway anymore like I

1:11:10

literally was like I can't eat

1:11:12

it and then of course in

1:11:14

one of the ironic twists that

1:11:16

Cupid so often likes to pull

1:11:18

I meet the love of my

1:11:20

life. And she is a subway

1:11:22

stand. And so she wants to

1:11:24

go there for lunch all the

1:11:27

time. And I'm just like, I

1:11:29

don't eat it. I can't eat

1:11:31

it. That's the thing. He goes,

1:11:33

I don't like it. I don't

1:11:35

like it. That's what he said.

1:11:37

But I never just, it was

1:11:39

never just a generic I don't

1:11:41

like it. it was like I

1:11:43

kind of can't eat it anymore

1:11:46

like it just became gross to

1:11:48

me over time I was never

1:11:50

like subways bad no yeah no

1:11:52

I don't like you were like

1:11:54

I don't like it I don't

1:11:56

like but I don't think you

1:11:58

really clarified that you got burned

1:12:00

out and then I think at

1:12:02

one point like six years into

1:12:05

our relationship you were like I

1:12:07

ate it so much I can't

1:12:09

eat it it was not and

1:12:11

then but listeners this is not

1:12:13

six years and I bet there

1:12:15

are people listening to this show

1:12:17

that already know this about me

1:12:19

Okay and then you like didn't

1:12:21

eat it forever and then you

1:12:24

went on the doe boys some

1:12:26

doe boys thing where they yeah

1:12:28

they were some doe boys things

1:12:30

the doe boys podcast No, I

1:12:32

know, no, but it was like

1:12:34

a special, like, wasn't it like

1:12:36

a special? It wasn't special. It

1:12:38

was, it was like so many

1:12:40

of their episodes, it was not

1:12:43

special at all. It was them

1:12:45

going back to a restaurant that

1:12:47

they had bid two, three other

1:12:49

times. Well, anyway, all that to

1:12:51

say, I remember, I went and

1:12:53

I bought the sandwiches for you

1:12:55

in Hayes. And then you got

1:12:57

your spicy Italian, and you eating

1:12:59

it, and you're like, it's pretty

1:13:02

good. And now you eat subway

1:13:04

again. Yeah, I'll get it. I'll

1:13:06

get it sometimes. Yeah, I know

1:13:08

it's good, but you didn't. It

1:13:10

was just like so. But it's

1:13:12

not my preference. But again, I

1:13:14

hadn't said, this is bad. I

1:13:16

loved the Spicy Italian subway all

1:13:18

the way through high school. That's

1:13:21

what I would get. Like I

1:13:23

would eat it all the time

1:13:25

and then up through my 20s

1:13:27

and then there was a period

1:13:29

for probably 24 to, you know,

1:13:31

whatever, whenever this happened 35 or

1:13:33

something. that I just was like

1:13:35

I kind of like the idea

1:13:37

of it is bad for me

1:13:40

and then once I had it

1:13:42

once and by the way all

1:13:44

my cells had replaced themselves by

1:13:46

this point you're entirely new human

1:13:48

being every seven years interesting that

1:13:50

it's why you don't love me

1:13:52

anymore wait what because you've been

1:13:54

you know seven years plus since

1:13:56

you've met me so you're

1:13:59

Totally new person new

1:14:01

person. Yeah. So all the

1:14:03

like cellular data that data that

1:14:05

you had that this was

1:14:08

like a positive It's

1:14:10

sort of dynamic. Yeah. yeah has

1:14:12

has been been erased. But

1:14:15

yeah so that's yeah, know that's

1:14:17

know, that's true. I did

1:14:20

that I did start eating again and it

1:14:22

did shake you up and now it's like and

1:14:24

now it's a hypocrite, I

1:14:26

guess, or something. hypocrite I guess or

1:14:28

something. I just feel like you could have made

1:14:30

our lives a lot easier if you lives a lot

1:14:32

I not evolve? just... Can I

1:14:34

not evolve? You like... Do have to hang hang

1:14:36

on to... is is Swiss cheese going away.

1:14:38

It's like, I just, Yeah, no, I'm I'm not

1:14:41

happy about it either, it but I

1:14:43

adjust. What is the is the practical

1:14:45

step I can take to move forward? Yeah,

1:14:47

Yeah, I switched from the original to the

1:14:49

from the because they also

1:14:51

discontinued original they also That's

1:14:53

right. original was

1:14:56

proud of you when you did that. And honey-o. which

1:14:58

they then brought back and then

1:15:00

discontinued again. discontinued

1:15:02

That was a tease, huh? a tease, huh?

1:15:05

I can, I I with them. with them.

1:15:07

I Thank you. It's just It's

1:15:09

just funny there's going gonna be so

1:15:11

many comments on this episode that

1:15:13

say, this is their best episode

1:15:15

is far, but I do think

1:15:17

the difference is this time people

1:15:20

are correct. is this

1:15:22

time people are

1:15:24

it's it's interesting. I wonder

1:15:26

what. I wonder what is. what. I wonder

1:15:29

what I there was like... I know what I'll get

1:15:31

attacked for. what I'll get it's an interesting thing I

1:15:33

could say about you. Like, what's like, thing I

1:15:35

could say about you. there's not

1:15:37

much that is interesting about me. most interesting

1:15:39

thing is that about me. do a podcast that

1:15:41

my wife doesn't listen to. It's sort of

1:15:43

a secret identity have. doesn't listen to.

1:15:46

It's sort of a And now I've ruined

1:15:48

even that. Yeah. And now I've Are

1:15:50

there any recent stories of you

1:15:52

ordering on Sean's behalf or

1:15:54

any issues that... I I always like

1:15:56

the stories about him being

1:15:58

shy at a restaurant. or having an

1:16:00

issue with an waiter and you

1:16:03

have to intervene. Have we had

1:16:05

an issue? I'm trying to think.

1:16:07

I'd say, well, would you say,

1:16:09

Grace, that I've gotten a little

1:16:12

better about it? Yeah, you have.

1:16:14

I've got a little better about

1:16:16

speaking up for myself. That's cool.

1:16:18

But part of the issue, Kevin,

1:16:21

is that I am such a,

1:16:23

it's been, this is probably a

1:16:25

little better too. But I am

1:16:27

sort of a coiled spring of

1:16:30

rage. And so like, if I

1:16:32

do start to speak up about

1:16:34

what I feel is an injustice,

1:16:36

I am afraid that it's going

1:16:39

to come out wrong. Yeah. And

1:16:41

if it's something smaller, like I'm

1:16:43

just like, I'll just live with

1:16:45

it. Like, yeah. I'm just like,

1:16:48

it's not cooked, but I'll just

1:16:50

eat it anyway. But gracious got

1:16:52

me to stop doing that. Like

1:16:54

it was just like no scenario

1:16:57

where I would ever tell anyone

1:16:59

at any like any restaurant or

1:17:01

anything that anything was wrong. I

1:17:03

would just be unhappy. We went

1:17:05

to the antique the other night

1:17:08

and you forgot that you every

1:17:10

time we go there you always

1:17:12

try to order that non-alcoholic. It's

1:17:14

on a mosque. Oh they have

1:17:17

a, so this is my thing

1:17:19

I'll go like if we go

1:17:21

to a nice dinner. I'll be

1:17:23

like, do you have any mocktails

1:17:26

or anything? Because I'm kind of

1:17:28

like, I'm out, you know? Yeah.

1:17:30

And a lot of times, especially

1:17:32

here, I feel like it, especially

1:17:35

lately, some of the like, nicer

1:17:37

restaurants, we'll have a couple of

1:17:39

options and one that sounds interesting,

1:17:41

but the place that we go

1:17:44

to, you know, most of them,

1:17:46

because we know the chef. It's

1:17:48

it's it's close to us is

1:17:50

Antico and They only really have

1:17:53

it's like a phone to groanie

1:17:55

Phoning to groan, phony, nagroni, that's

1:17:57

right. Great name. Thank you. And

1:17:59

he didn't come in. I kind

1:18:02

of will read the name. I

1:18:04

think the name, I think the

1:18:06

great name is part of the

1:18:08

problem. Because I know every time.

1:18:11

I talk myself into it. I

1:18:13

know. It's like, oh, well, the

1:18:15

name like that. It's got to

1:18:17

be something like, but I've got

1:18:19

it and disliked it. It's not

1:18:22

like they make a phony nagroni.

1:18:24

It's a bottle- That's the other

1:18:26

thing I always remember that it's

1:18:28

like a canned fucking thing, like

1:18:31

that it's like, oh, because you

1:18:33

know, there's plenty of place too

1:18:35

that go like, we don't have

1:18:37

any on the menu, but it's

1:18:40

like, we'll put fucking grapefruit juice

1:18:42

and ginger ale and a thing,

1:18:44

you know, like just like a

1:18:46

shelved product that I could buy.

1:18:49

We should actually talk to them

1:18:51

about it. But you should do

1:18:53

it Grace. Tell Chad, say Chad,

1:18:55

let's have a, Chad, why don't

1:18:58

we have a? Yeah, I feel

1:19:00

like there has to have been

1:19:02

some engagement. Like, was there anything

1:19:04

at like coffee recently? I feel

1:19:07

like there must have been something.

1:19:09

At coffee? Oh, well, we had

1:19:11

a lot of turnover at our

1:19:13

local coffee place. Did we have

1:19:16

anything? I know now, now, the

1:19:18

playing field is level, Sean. You

1:19:20

could maybe become their favorite of

1:19:22

the couple. Great, everywhere we go

1:19:24

that we're regulators, everyone knows Grace.

1:19:27

I've talked about this before. But

1:19:29

there was like a gym that

1:19:31

I went to for, was it,

1:19:33

I mean, genuinely Grace, eight months,

1:19:36

ten months, without you going there?

1:19:38

And then you went, yeah, it

1:19:40

might have been a year, and

1:19:42

then Grace started going, and within

1:19:45

a month, every time she walked

1:19:47

in, every single person there said

1:19:49

hi to her, and no one

1:19:51

had ever said hi to me.

1:19:54

Yeah. Everyone would go. It's like

1:19:56

multiple people. It's good to be

1:19:58

married. It's good to be married

1:20:00

to the mayor. You're like little

1:20:03

Doug Amofs. right? I think so.

1:20:05

Yeah for sure. Maybe a bad

1:20:07

friend style clip we could get

1:20:09

of Sean is I always see

1:20:12

ones of these guys like eight

1:20:14

of them going out to dinner

1:20:16

together and racking up a bill

1:20:18

of like 10 grand and then

1:20:21

like birdcrush or something's like, it's

1:20:23

on me. What is bad friends?

1:20:25

That's Santino and Bobby Lee. And,

1:20:27

uh, you know what, that does

1:20:29

come up in my feed. I

1:20:32

told, I fucking told you. But

1:20:34

it's mostly, it's mostly camera on

1:20:36

Bobby Lee. Yeah, being silly. Well,

1:20:38

yeah, or yeah, okay, yeah, I

1:20:41

have seen them. Yeah, I didn't

1:20:43

know for sure. There's no way

1:20:45

Santino's not in your feed. I

1:20:47

don't know what that means. Come

1:20:50

on. We had a friend, we

1:20:52

had a friend who for some

1:20:54

reason just like chose. The bit

1:20:56

that Andrew Santino was Grace's hall

1:20:59

pass. It's like she never said

1:21:01

anything about him. It's so it

1:21:03

just endowed her with this trait.

1:21:05

And it's sort of is like,

1:21:08

I don't know. They've like spoken

1:21:10

it into existence. He's in her

1:21:12

TikTok feed, which of course I

1:21:14

knew. Yeah, that's so funny. I

1:21:17

can ship with him in a

1:21:19

way. Is that right? I'm starting

1:21:21

to feel connected to him. I

1:21:23

mean, I'm gonna have to figure

1:21:26

it out. He's gonna be raising

1:21:28

my kids. Who did you, you

1:21:30

made that joke earlier today? Right

1:21:32

here, Grace. Oh my God, Kevin

1:21:34

has the phone. It can happen

1:21:37

right now. Share contact. Who'd I

1:21:39

make that joke about? I made

1:21:41

that joke about Julian Edelman because

1:21:43

you have like an old patriot

1:21:46

sweatshirt and you were like, no,

1:21:48

excuse me sir. No, it's specific

1:21:50

high school, specific football. Wrong. It's

1:21:52

the it's the bowl from the

1:21:55

College of San Mateo, which is

1:21:57

the community college where he went

1:21:59

for two years like that has

1:22:01

a great football program. Yeah, there

1:22:04

it is. Pacific graffiti ball. Yeah,

1:22:06

I like. If I see if

1:22:08

I be saying Pacific football and

1:22:10

you're going wrong. Well, Pacific football

1:22:13

is like the whole shirt. No,

1:22:15

but it's the Pacific graffiti bowl.

1:22:17

It's not like Pacific is in

1:22:19

the name of the. Babe, I

1:22:22

ain't looking at the words. I

1:22:24

don't know. Not really not really

1:22:26

reading is this one. I feel

1:22:28

like you're slipping into It's a

1:22:31

lot of this It's mostly faces

1:22:33

How many people watch this thing?

1:22:35

17? How many people watch this

1:22:37

thing? 17? How many? Well, we

1:22:40

don't want to say. Do we

1:22:42

not want to say? Kevin sometimes

1:22:44

bleeps out the numbers when you're

1:22:46

not humiliated. There's like five, six

1:22:48

hundred people that watch it. That's

1:22:51

a lot more. For the videos?

1:22:53

Yeah, a lot more are paying

1:22:55

for it, which is the deceiving

1:22:57

part. Really? Yeah. Wow. Because there's

1:23:00

like ten times that that are

1:23:02

subscribing, right? Yeah. It's twenty two

1:23:04

hundred that are paying for it

1:23:06

and like. Maybe 700. Sometimes a

1:23:09

thousand, like the handbook ones get

1:23:11

like a thousand, like half. That's

1:23:13

not ten. The pro version and

1:23:15

stuff. Well I was saying that

1:23:18

there's whatever. I don't want to

1:23:20

say, I don't want to make

1:23:22

Kevin. This one will get more

1:23:24

for sure. But I'm not on

1:23:27

the video. Doesn't matter. Oh grace.

1:23:29

We don't care. Maybe time for

1:23:31

an ego check. You're on for

1:23:33

a second. Well, we'll see what

1:23:36

the number is. But you just

1:23:38

think, no, but the implication is

1:23:40

if she was on the video

1:23:42

that it would, that the numbers

1:23:45

would skyrocket. It would. So you're

1:23:47

so, so you're. so high on

1:23:49

yourself. Evan is agreeing with me.

1:23:51

Oh I would appreciate it financially

1:23:53

and I married you. Do I

1:23:56

get any credit for this? I

1:23:58

was an early adopter. All right

1:24:00

well this is an early adopter.

1:24:02

All right well this is longer

1:24:05

than we usually do Grace you

1:24:07

know that. I'll go on video

1:24:09

for the end. Yes. What's our

1:24:11

little wrap-up? Look who's here. Who's

1:24:14

here? Who's here? Who's here? Honey

1:24:16

Bunn? Honey? She's looking sweet. Cuddest

1:24:18

doggy. How she doing? She gets

1:24:20

so big so fast. How's she

1:24:23

doing with Bosch Man? Oh, she's

1:24:25

amazing. You get along great. Yeah,

1:24:27

that's awesome. Mm-hmm. That's cool. Okay.

1:24:29

So what do any wrap up,

1:24:32

any parting thoughts? Do you feel

1:24:34

like this episode made you more

1:24:36

likely or less likely to listen

1:24:38

to listen to the show? Great.

1:24:41

I mean, maybe I'll listen to

1:24:43

the first episode I listen. That's

1:24:45

where a lot of people start.

1:24:47

Come on. Yeah, their own episodes

1:24:50

Yeah, it's also where a lot

1:24:52

of people don't start We have

1:24:54

a lot of guests who've never

1:24:56

heard the show and then they

1:24:58

leave and go on now I

1:25:01

never will You think there's people

1:25:03

that have been on the show

1:25:05

that have never listened to an

1:25:07

episode? 1 thousand percent and maybe

1:25:10

the majority. Yeah, at least 40

1:25:12

percent. It's yeah, it's it's like

1:25:14

half It's 40% that and then

1:25:16

another percent that is people have

1:25:19

done it multiple times, but it

1:25:21

still feels like they haven't hurt

1:25:23

the show before Well, I'll say

1:25:25

this and God bless him and

1:25:28

and I love him and he's

1:25:30

so nice and he was really

1:25:32

nice about it But I did

1:25:34

see Pat and Oswald yesterday and

1:25:37

he's done the show multiple times

1:25:39

and we did a best show

1:25:41

with him, but I realize you

1:25:43

know it was on zoom at

1:25:46

least once maybe twice. Yep. And

1:25:48

But it's just like in my

1:25:50

head like I know he

1:25:52

he is. so so

1:25:55

I just walked

1:25:57

up and I

1:25:59

was like, up and

1:26:01

was like hey he was

1:26:03

like and he he was

1:26:06

so polite, but I was like you don't

1:26:08

you You don't know. know And

1:26:10

I was like, was like ah okay like hey

1:26:12

yeah I'm Sean it's so nice to meet I'm

1:26:14

trying It's so nice to

1:26:17

meet you out to transition out

1:26:19

of it two then two

1:26:21

seconds later someone else is

1:26:23

talking to else like well, you

1:26:25

know him right? goes like you know

1:26:27

Sean right it's like yeah Of course I had

1:26:29

knew I knew him. Did you tell

1:26:31

me? I said we've I said, we've

1:26:33

done some podcasts together and he was like,

1:26:36

well, that's how people know each other now. how

1:26:38

people know each other now.

1:26:40

what all our that's what

1:26:42

are. our And it's how, and now it's how

1:26:44

I know my wife as well. how and now it's

1:26:46

how you didn't my wife as didn't But you

1:26:48

you didn't say the name of your

1:26:50

didn't say the It was, your

1:26:53

podcast? It was um at that at

1:26:55

that point in that specific scenario. I

1:26:58

don't don't think it would have helped. helped. See, this

1:27:00

this is why like my friends, my

1:27:02

friends call me the queen of Context, like if

1:27:04

I was there, I would have been like there,

1:27:06

I this is been like, Patton, this Like Sean, he hosts

1:27:08

Hollywood so bad at it. I, Sean's like

1:27:11

so bad at contextualizing things.

1:27:13

Like that's that's how you should just always

1:27:15

continue to let your ears, like, you guys. guys. You guys

1:27:17

Have a lot in common. You were both guests

1:27:19

on my podcast on I podcast Hollywood Handbook.

1:27:21

Yeah, that could be put. possible. What to the

1:27:23

pro version would you be okay with that? I would

1:27:26

love that be would love that I say

1:27:28

this and I've said it on this

1:27:30

show. said you know this show, I think the pro

1:27:32

I think I remember thing we do. we

1:27:34

do. I think the in thing like do. I do. not

1:27:36

gonna pay for it. like, I'm not

1:27:38

going to pay i think

1:27:40

the No, actually the pro version actually,

1:27:43

that's, and even, and we

1:27:45

look at the clips, we weren't clipping

1:27:47

the pro version for a while and

1:27:49

I'm just like, a like this I like this because

1:27:51

me too with guests I I and I our guests

1:27:53

and I'm grateful, of course, for anyone

1:27:55

who comes on in the show the can

1:27:58

be, can the highs can be so much

1:28:00

higher with a great guest and

1:28:02

like a great interaction but the

1:28:04

base level of a pro version

1:28:06

the basement is is is higher

1:28:08

because there's never like me and

1:28:10

Hayes being like we don't know

1:28:12

what to do with this person

1:28:14

or like we've run we've run

1:28:16

out of road on this idea

1:28:18

that we had and we don't

1:28:21

actually know this person well enough

1:28:23

to know how we can joke

1:28:25

around with them anymore and that

1:28:27

that just never happens so the

1:28:29

The lows are lower. So like

1:28:31

the pro version is this is

1:28:33

SSRIs, like this is yours all

1:28:35

off. Like we eliminate the peaks

1:28:37

and valleys and you can just

1:28:39

kind of chill out, which I

1:28:41

think is really where most podcasts,

1:28:43

um, want to live. I think

1:28:45

if I had a commute I

1:28:48

could do it more. I just

1:28:50

like I have limited like listening

1:28:52

time. Yeah. And you want it

1:28:54

for stuff you like. No,

1:28:56

yeah, well stuff, yeah, stuff I

1:28:58

know I like. Yeah. That's the

1:29:00

part of the exit survey that

1:29:02

people leave off. Have less listening

1:29:05

time, parentheses, and I spend it

1:29:07

listening to the stuff I like.

1:29:09

I was just like, I'm so

1:29:11

invested in like all these reality

1:29:13

people. Yeah. Are you going to

1:29:15

see the, is it called Giggly

1:29:17

Squad? They're a massive, massive show.

1:29:19

They're like always, you went to

1:29:21

the live show. Yeah, are you

1:29:23

going to go to another one?

1:29:25

And then they came out, the

1:29:27

first thing they said is there's

1:29:29

a lot of guys here and

1:29:31

we don't like it. And they

1:29:33

looked right. They pointed at me.

1:29:35

Did you think they were going

1:29:37

to bring them up? Sean brought

1:29:39

a half pack hat for them.

1:29:41

And it went way south. Way

1:29:43

south. Oh no. Like we didn't

1:29:45

even, like it wasn't even ever

1:29:47

going to be a part of

1:29:49

it. And we were like, oh,

1:29:52

maybe we'll see them and we

1:29:54

could, they'll like it. Was there

1:29:56

a, was there a meet and

1:29:58

greet? No. Not that we were

1:30:00

a part of. They were pulling

1:30:02

people up on stage, but they

1:30:04

were, it was, they were very

1:30:06

clear that they did not want

1:30:08

any married men on stage. That's

1:30:10

right. Yeah, because they were like,

1:30:12

we don't want to ruin your

1:30:14

marriage. I actually, I mean, you

1:30:16

must have been thinking, Grace, did

1:30:18

you not think, like, I would

1:30:20

have done pretty well up there.

1:30:22

Yeah, totally. And then I asked

1:30:24

you whether you think Hannah Burner

1:30:26

knows Hollywood Handbook, and you said,

1:30:28

she met. Did I say that?

1:30:30

You think? I doubt it. Do

1:30:32

you think Hannah Burner knows Hollywood

1:30:34

Handbook, Kevin? I don't really know

1:30:36

her. She, I mean, she's a

1:30:39

stand-up, but I feel like she's

1:30:41

in a, just a totally different

1:30:43

scene. Is that Esther? Yeah, I

1:30:45

know. But Esther is also attached

1:30:47

to a totally different scene with

1:30:49

a lot of comedians, very successful

1:30:51

comedians, who do not know Hollywood

1:30:53

Handbook, and will not be knowing

1:30:55

Hollywood Handbook in the future. Oh,

1:30:57

she did the talk to a

1:30:59

podcast. She died during this episode.

1:31:01

What? She did talk to a,

1:31:03

the Hawk to a podcast. Yeah,

1:31:05

the number four podcast out right

1:31:07

now. And she did an episode.

1:31:09

I'm gonna say Hannah doesn't know,

1:31:11

but she knows people who know.

1:31:13

Well, I know she knows people

1:31:15

and knows Esther. Yeah. Mailed it.

1:31:17

Kevin gets a point for Kevin.

1:31:19

And your face, Grace. Okay, well

1:31:21

this was so great to have

1:31:23

you on. As you say that

1:31:26

you're obsessed with following all these

1:31:28

reality stars, Grace. Yeah. No, I

1:31:30

don't follow around. There's a lot

1:31:32

of them that have podcasts that

1:31:34

I like. I know and you

1:31:36

listen to them. I know. Well,

1:31:38

that's following them, right? Or following

1:31:40

their exploits in some way. But

1:31:42

what I wanted to say was

1:31:44

we do get a request. Probably

1:31:46

once a month on either like

1:31:48

read it or some comment just

1:31:50

being like especially if I ever

1:31:52

mention anything due to reality TV

1:31:54

It's like I wish they would

1:31:56

do reality show show like even

1:31:58

if they did it like I

1:32:00

say that I told you to

1:32:02

do reality shows. I know. But

1:32:04

look, I have you here. We're

1:32:06

talking. Yeah, you and I. Maybe

1:32:08

it's. That's what I'm saying. Maybe

1:32:11

every other month, every, you know,

1:32:13

like a couple times a year,

1:32:15

every whatever. People would die. Jump

1:32:17

in. We do some, we do

1:32:19

a reality show roundup. I mean,

1:32:21

right now, none of our like

1:32:23

big shows are on. The challenges

1:32:25

on. I know, but you're out

1:32:27

on the season. You're out on

1:32:29

the season, but I would say

1:32:31

that the challenge is one of

1:32:33

our big shows. Historically, it has

1:32:35

been, I'm not out on the

1:32:37

season, but I'm not like, I've

1:32:39

been like, I'm going to say

1:32:41

this, I think we would be,

1:32:43

what? I think I'm watching the

1:32:45

season closer than you are, I

1:32:47

think you're on your phone more

1:32:49

than me. I was just going

1:32:51

to say, I think we would

1:32:53

like this season better if we

1:32:55

put our phones away. But part

1:32:58

of the problem is it's 90

1:33:00

minute episodes which I think is

1:33:02

too long. And they did that

1:33:04

with Survivor too and the episodes

1:33:06

are longer. And we could just