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2024.acast.com and see how you

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can make your brand part

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of the conversation. Hi

1:31

and welcome back to how

1:33

I quit alcohol. Happy New

1:36

Year everyone. 2025. Oh my

1:38

gosh. See you later 2024.

1:41

You've been pretty good, but

1:43

I can't wait for 2025.

1:45

Every new year, every day

1:48

is an opportunity for change,

1:50

for change and growth. And

1:52

I'm super stoked because as

1:55

of today, I am and so

1:57

zash. Seven years alcohol.

1:59

Oh, free. Oh, my holy God!

2:01

I can't believe it. I

2:03

cannot, cannot believe it that

2:05

it's been seven years since

2:07

we've had a drink. That

2:09

is seven years of far

2:11

better choices, not waking up

2:14

with shame and regret, not

2:16

making dicks out of ourselves,

2:18

not embarrassing myself in front

2:20

of the neighbors. The list

2:22

goes on and on and

2:24

on. And honestly, it is

2:27

the best thing. that, well, certainly

2:29

I've ever done, and I'm sure Ash

2:31

would say the same thing too, it

2:33

changed our whole life. In fact, I

2:36

had no idea the impact

2:38

of quitting alcohol, not

2:40

only is it also helped tens

2:42

of thousands of people as

2:44

well, but just from us making

2:46

that choice and then going on

2:49

to make this podcast and

2:51

the other work, but just

2:53

the impact on our general

2:55

health and our family, our

2:57

relationship. Just everything like I really

2:59

think that There's no part of your

3:01

life that alcohol doesn't touch and it's

3:04

the same as no alcohol It's had

3:06

a ripple effect through My whole life,

3:08

and I'm just so so grateful

3:10

It hasn't always been easy. You

3:13

know certainly that first year was

3:15

pretty tough sometimes I was just

3:17

reflecting this morning in my journaling

3:19

thinking I remember some time like

3:21

around seven months thinking, oh my

3:24

God, wow, this is still going.

3:26

Or different milestones throughout that 12

3:28

months. I was like, wow, gosh,

3:30

this is so long to go.

3:33

And at times it felt really

3:35

tough, times it felt lonely,

3:37

at times it felt

3:39

super uncomfortable. But once

3:41

we started to change the

3:43

mindset with it, that really helped.

3:45

But also just sticking to your

3:47

guns, the more it clicks in

3:49

and... the easier it gets eventually.

3:51

So I wanted to talk to

3:54

you guys this morning just very

3:56

quickly and give you maybe some

3:58

journaling prompts that might help. you

4:00

or a little plan to help keep

4:02

you on track for your New Year's

4:04

reso if you've got one. Not everyone

4:07

does the reso, the New Year's resolution.

4:09

I always do. I always have something

4:11

that or some intention that I like

4:13

to bring into my new year. So

4:16

your New Year's resolution, your reso, what

4:18

is that? And how are you going

4:20

to stick to it? So this

4:22

is a thing so many people.

4:24

make news resolutions and January goes

4:26

by which turns into February and

4:29

that month is gone and so

4:31

is only years resolution usually and

4:33

it takes a certain special kind

4:35

of something to keep you on

4:37

track and to help you stick

4:39

with it and I think sometimes

4:41

saying right that's it for however

4:43

long can be really hard but

4:45

also it can help you as

4:47

well so rather than say something's

4:49

forever you give it a time

4:51

frame. So get specific, the first thing

4:54

I would say, and this is

4:56

one of the smart goal tactics,

4:58

is being very specific, what is

5:00

it that you want? And without being

5:02

too vague, really get quite specific,

5:04

so I want to quit alcohol

5:07

for however long. Ours was to

5:09

do 12 months without alcohol. I

5:11

love doing 12 months. I think

5:13

giving yourself 12 months really

5:15

gives you a good amount of time

5:17

to sink your teeth into it to go

5:20

right. This is what I'm doing. and I'm

5:22

not wavering. And okay, so what is it

5:24

that I want? Be specific about the goal.

5:26

So what is it you're doing? How long

5:29

for? And for some people, 12 months

5:31

is way too much. I'm all or nothing

5:33

type person to. So I'm always like, let's

5:35

just go for it. And you could still

5:38

do it in increments over that time. So

5:40

even though I did 12 months, that was...

5:42

what my intention was I would still break

5:44

it up into little mini goals so it

5:46

might have just been just get through this

5:49

first week the next week and the next

5:51

week and just keep on tacking those on

5:53

and on and on until oh gosh now

5:55

I've done a month that's amazing okay I'm

5:57

one month into my 12 months and I

5:59

just kept going like that. So really

6:01

propelling myself along that way. And Ash

6:03

did the same thing. But write it

6:06

down as well. So if you write

6:08

things down, you can write it down in

6:10

a journal. I really like to get an

6:12

exercise book or a journal, write it

6:14

down. You can put on sticky notes,

6:16

you can chuck it on your phone,

6:18

but seeing what your goal is, seeing

6:20

it there in paper every day really

6:22

helps to keep the motivation up. and

6:25

it's a good reminder of, oh yeah

6:27

I'm doing that thing, you might stick

6:29

you noted around the car, around the

6:31

fridge, around the kettle, the bathroom mirror,

6:33

next to your bedside table, or

6:35

just might just be in your journal,

6:38

so writing it down. Another really good

6:40

thing, we never did this, but tracking

6:42

your progress can be really good. So

6:45

a lot of people use the I

6:47

am sober app, if you're doing

6:49

alcohol free perhaps, that's really good.

6:51

I guess we did actually, because...

6:53

we were journaling every day so

6:55

perhaps that was our tracker but

6:57

there's so many cool tracking apps

6:59

out there for whatever your New

7:01

Year's resolution is so tracking your

7:03

progress is really good and it

7:05

also helps you to celebrate those

7:07

small little wins and yeah I

7:09

really think that I am sober

7:11

app is absolutely fantastic it's really

7:13

really awesome one of my New

7:15

Year's resolutions is to do more yoga

7:17

I just love my yoga practice and I'm

7:20

quite regular with my yoga practice,

7:22

but for me yoga is not

7:24

just the assener, but it's also

7:27

the meditation, the breathwork, the reading.

7:29

And so I do an online platform

7:31

called Yoga Glow. You can track your

7:33

progress through that or insight timer if

7:35

your meditate, if your New Year's resolution

7:37

is to do meditation every day or

7:39

breathwork, you might want to go on

7:41

to insight timer and you can track

7:44

your progress as well on there. And

7:46

I think that's a really cool way

7:48

to do it. And having an accountability

7:50

buddy also really helps. So someone that

7:52

either is going to do it with

7:54

you or just someone that's going to

7:57

cheerlead you. And the cheerleader has to

7:59

be someone that's... They have to make it

8:01

not negotiable, just like you do. Making

8:03

it completely non-negotiable. Like for us

8:06

in that 12 months, it

8:08

was like, it's non-negotiable. That's it.

8:10

100% commitment. That's it. No matter what,

8:12

I don't care what happens. I don't

8:14

care how uncomfortable I feel. I don't

8:16

care how shitty I get. I don't

8:18

care how dysregulated I am. I am

8:20

not putting a drink to my lips.

8:22

And at times in that 12 months

8:24

when we or I speak for myself,

8:26

when I felt like drinking. I just

8:28

knew but it's non-negotiable like it's just

8:30

not and then there was a couple

8:32

times where I was really going to

8:34

waiver that was really on the edge

8:36

and I reached out to my group

8:38

which was the club sober fairly well

8:40

documented on this podcast and I reached

8:42

out to our group and said fuck

8:44

I think I'm about to drink and

8:47

someone came back to me and said no

8:49

if I can not you're going to go outside

8:51

and have cup of tea is what you going

8:53

to do and get your shit together. It

8:55

was exactly what I needed needed to

8:57

hear. So having an accountability buddy or

8:59

someone that you can reach out to or

9:01

someone that's in it with you is really

9:04

really helpful but they have to be non-negotiable

9:06

as well. Choose your people wisely and just

9:08

say to them no matter what I don't

9:10

care what I say do not let me

9:13

when you feel so much better for it

9:15

obviously when you do get yourself through it

9:17

if they've helped you through. Another thing we

9:19

did was visualizing... what we wanted. So

9:22

I also thought about the person I

9:24

wanted to become and I'd visualize myself

9:26

being that. So I'd visualize myself at

9:28

parties not drinking, I'd visualize myself getting

9:30

ready and not drinking, I visualize myself

9:33

the next day getting up feeling good.

9:35

and every time I visualized it just

9:37

helped to cement it. Remember your body

9:39

doesn't know what's actually happening in reality

9:42

or what you're thinking. So just thinking

9:44

about it, visualizing it, it's sending the

9:46

messages to your body that this is

9:48

happening. So that's a really good tool to do

9:50

as well. And then of course the journaling

9:52

prompts. So this morning my journaling prompts,

9:55

so I was writing down what it

9:57

is that I want for my new

9:59

year, my intention. what my new year's

10:01

resolution is, what I'd like to bring

10:03

and for me that's what I'd like

10:05

to bring more of into my life

10:07

this year and what I'd like to

10:09

let go of. I did that last

10:11

night, I did it again this morning

10:13

and so writing that down how I'm going to

10:15

do it. So how I'm going to make some

10:17

space for myself. So what is it I

10:20

want? How am I going to

10:22

do it? How am I going to create a

10:24

bit of space and for me and this

10:26

is one thing that I've

10:28

done this for years. I've always

10:30

promised myself I will do

10:32

one yoga pose a day whether

10:34

it's just child's pose

10:36

or one downward dog and

10:38

I've done that for years and

10:40

years and years now. I've always done

10:42

one so I might only do

10:44

that one but it's one thing

10:46

that I'm doing so if

10:49

you write that down to how am I

10:51

going to do this or how am I

10:53

going to make space or can I make

10:55

sure I do just one one thing

10:57

towards this goal every

10:59

day and that's also non -negotiable. It's

11:01

non -negotiable for me to do one yoga

11:04

pose a day has been for years

11:06

and you know what happens remarkably most

11:08

of the time I don't stop at

11:10

one I do a few more but

11:12

there's no pressure it's just oh if

11:14

I'm feeling it oh I'm feeling this

11:16

now oh yeah I might move in

11:18

this different way now and it's great

11:20

it's helped me so much and it

11:22

connects me to my body whatever it

11:24

is that is your new year's resolution

11:26

what is it how am I going

11:28

to do it and what's one small

11:30

thing I can do to help support

11:32

that every day make it very very

11:34

small that comes from tiny habits great

11:36

book make it small make

11:38

it achievable so there you

11:40

three general prompts and then I love this

11:42

one and I was doing this one this

11:44

morning as well what impact is it going

11:46

to have what impact is it

11:48

going to have on me

11:50

my work my family

11:52

my friends relationships finances my

11:54

spiritual life my

11:57

physical body so

11:59

and anything else that you can think of

12:01

what impact is going to have on me because

12:03

that's huge and then you start to

12:05

it's not just I just want to

12:07

do this thing you actually start to

12:09

see the flow on effect the impact

12:12

that's going to have which for me

12:14

just feels really good to write that down

12:16

and then I love this one and I

12:18

would be grateful for this change in my

12:20

life why why are my grateful for this

12:22

change in my life and that just

12:24

adds another extra layer of yuminess

12:27

on top I'm grateful for this because

12:29

it makes me feel good, because it

12:31

makes me a better person, because it

12:34

helps me connect to my body, when

12:36

I'm connected to my body, you

12:38

make better choices. There's some prompts

12:40

there that will help you, and

12:42

you can do those every single

12:44

day. I've talked about this before

12:46

too, where today I'm committed too,

12:48

and write down. So what is that

12:50

I'm committed to? 100% committed to?

12:52

How am I going to do it? What's one

12:54

step towards it? what impact is

12:57

it going to have and why I'm

12:59

grateful for this change. I think that's

13:01

just such a simple and easy journaling

13:03

practice that you can do every day

13:05

that will help get you towards your

13:07

goal. And it's super easy and it just

13:09

helps cement it for you every day. So

13:11

if you could do that every day and

13:13

you just make that non-negotiable as well,

13:15

going to get there in my journal

13:18

every day, repeat the same thing probably

13:20

every day, doesn't matter, it just is

13:22

going to help to remind me. And

13:24

I'm just going to add something extra

13:26

just for fun. When I first started

13:29

setting up my daily practice, because I

13:31

had no daily practice, but I

13:33

would write down the night before what it

13:35

was that I was going to do the

13:37

next day. And I find that so, so

13:40

helpful because it gets me a bit

13:42

excited about waking up the next morning.

13:44

So I'd roll out my yoga mat.

13:46

and put my journal there down beside

13:48

it, my little incense holder, and I'd

13:50

make this little ritual for myself every

13:52

morning, but I had it written down

13:55

on paper. Nothing too crazy. And now

13:57

it's different too, but just a couple

13:59

of things. going to do at least

14:01

one yoga pose, do a bit of

14:03

journaling, at least do some gratitude, blah

14:05

blah blah blah blah. And so I'd write

14:07

that down a little plan for myself, write

14:10

it down every night and I'd do that

14:12

for quite a while until it became habit,

14:14

until it became a new habit

14:16

that I was doing and the

14:18

practice started to cement. And then

14:20

if I'm adding in a new practice

14:22

into my life, I'll do the

14:24

same thing again. So it all sounds

14:27

pretty strict and disciplined and yes it

14:29

is. You have to have to

14:31

have to have quite a lot of

14:34

discipline. And discipline brings joy. There's no

14:36

doubt about it. Discipline brings joy.

14:38

Discipline gives us boundaries. It helps us

14:40

keep ourselves in check and in line.

14:43

Of course we don't do it

14:45

with any self-fungulation or telling ourselves off,

14:47

but we do it with joy and

14:49

love. And also, here's another great

14:51

question too. Am I doing this

14:54

out of self-hatred? Or am I doing

14:56

this because I really love myself?

14:58

because I care about myself enough

15:00

to make these changes and that

15:02

is the most important and probably

15:04

the only way to create change

15:06

in your life. When you're trying

15:08

to create change out of self-hatred

15:10

it's so hard but if you

15:12

want to create some change and

15:14

bring new things into your life

15:16

because you care about yourself because

15:19

you love yourself enough to do

15:21

that, that change becomes a whole lot

15:23

easier if you keep reminding yourself every

15:25

time you go to make a choice.

15:27

Is this the most loving choice

15:29

for me? Is this the most caring

15:31

choice for me? I'm doing this

15:33

because I care about myself. Oh

15:35

God brings me to tears because

15:37

that's the place we need to

15:40

come from. It's absolutely not

15:42

going to work when we do things

15:44

out of self-hatred. And I must say,

15:46

my first 12 months off alcohol, it

15:48

started out of self-legulation. It was like,

15:50

you're a fuck weird, you need to take time

15:52

off. That wasn't cool. It wasn't until

15:54

I started to change the conversation with

15:56

myself, which took some time. It became

15:59

easier and it... became something that I

16:01

wanted to do. So I think that's

16:03

probably one of the most important things

16:05

out of everything I've waffled on about

16:07

today. Why am I doing this? Is

16:10

it because I care about myself and

16:12

because I care about myself enough

16:14

to do this? Or am I doing it

16:16

from a place of self-hatred? If you are,

16:18

if it's yes, can you change that? Can

16:20

you spend a bit more time in your

16:22

journal? See if you can find the part

16:25

of yourself that loves you enough to do

16:27

this change for that. And on that note,

16:29

I'll leave you with that. Good luck everyone.

16:31

Please reach out if you want help with

16:33

any of this kind of stuff. You can

16:36

reach out, do some one-on-one coaching with me,

16:38

you can join my next challenge on

16:40

February 2nd. all the information there on

16:42

my website you might come on retreat

16:44

with me and Bali all these things

16:46

are going to help you to reset

16:48

and to create hopefully a new life

16:50

for yourself or it might just be

16:53

listening to the podcast might be listening

16:55

to other podcast might be reading good

16:57

books just keep up the good input

16:59

keep up the good stuff and keep on

17:01

cheering yourself on be your greatest cheerleader

17:03

be your greatest advocate I love

17:06

anyone that's trying to create

17:08

positive change for themselves.

17:10

It's so exciting. So happy

17:13

year everyone. Stay in touch.

17:15

Bye! Hey

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