0:10

Hello, welcome to the John Tomatha

0:12

podcast for round 622 gives a

0:14

shit mate. We are coming

0:16

to you from Wayne Jackson Studios.

0:19

My name is Michael Chamberlain. Hey

0:21

mate, sorry. I just need

0:23

to check in before we get the show

0:25

kicked off. I know a big day

0:27

for you. We've lost a

0:29

Pope. Are you okay? I need to, I

0:31

need to check you. I'm sure you've,

0:33

I'm sure your brothers in arms at Xavier

0:35

have wrapped their arms around you. I

0:37

mean, I know you say the priests regularly

0:39

reach out to you from the school.

0:42

And I just want to know, yeah, I

0:44

just want to know, are you okay

0:46

buddy? Look, mate, it's been, I think it's

0:48

two and two years now. We

0:51

are churning through the Pope's

0:53

ear. We lost Ratzenberg. He wasn't

0:55

officially the Pope, but I

0:57

think we lost him about two

0:59

years ago now around about

1:01

now so look it's tough look

1:03

um i can imagine look

1:05

the boys are getting around them

1:07

they're brothers um you know we're um

1:09

yeah no that's all we can really

1:11

do in a situation like this i

1:13

mean that's fair enough i mean what

1:15

88 year old after spending a month

1:17

in hospital and then meeting the

1:19

vice president of the United States just

1:21

drops dead like that. Are you saying conspiracy

1:24

theory? Like you had double pneumonia that

1:26

you call on it? Yeah, I mean always.

1:28

An 88 year old with double pneumonia

1:30

does not just die. I

1:33

hear what you say, Michael. But

1:37

have you been to the Vatican? I

1:41

have been. I have been to the Vatican.

1:43

I talked about it in my comedy festival

1:45

show. And when I was there, there was

1:47

a someone in a Collingwood jumper. Oh, that's

1:49

right. That's right. Was that genuinely in the

1:51

Sistine Chapel? Yes, it was.

1:53

Yes. There was a dude in a

1:55

Collingwood jumper in the Sistine Chapel. That is

1:57

actually... Australians just don't give a fuck. They're

2:00

like, whatever. I'm wearing my Collingwood jumper.

2:02

That is genuinely amazing. I'm amazed it was

2:04

an West Coast Eagles jumper for one

2:06

thing. But to dress for the Vatican. and

2:09

go, I'm gonna pop on my

2:11

Hollywood jumper. It's a

2:13

remarkable choice overseas. Now

2:15

was it, I mean, not this really changed

2:17

my opinion, but was it summer? Like was it

2:19

hot? No, it

2:21

wasn't. It was winter. So you can understand.

2:23

Although you had the short sleeves on,

2:26

but probably the T -shirt underneath. I

2:29

can't remember the number. So it's about, it

2:31

would have been 2000 or 2001. So I can't

2:33

remember the number that the person had on.

2:35

But you hope around that time, you hope that

2:37

I'm running with bucks. I wonder

2:39

if he was walking around town and going, maybe

2:41

I can pass for a, a Ventus fan. Oh,

2:44

okay. Yeah. Yeah. But

2:46

just back to the Pope, I mean, to lose him

2:48

like that, do we know, do we have any idea where

2:50

Noah Bolter was on the weekend? Was he in there?

2:54

Maybe the Pope was just outside the local

2:56

RSL, the Rome RSL, and Noah's just

2:58

fucking spotted him and going, oh, fuck it,

3:00

that can't, that can't in the big

3:02

hat, mate. It's fucking asking for it. It's

3:04

a real shame that, um, Caro

3:06

can't fire her arrow tonight. I'm

3:09

classified. Yeah. Mate,

3:12

the Vatican, well, they, cause they've got to

3:14

pick a new, they've got to pick a

3:16

new Pope, and they gave away first pick

3:18

in the Pope draft. So

3:21

they fucking got no idea. So they gave

3:23

a future first round to the Hindus. There's

3:32

a movie out at the moment called The Conclave,

3:34

which is about... Have you not seen it? ...selecting

3:37

the new... No, you'll be surprised I

3:39

haven't. It's actually... Of course, fucking. Yeah,

3:41

great advertising. I think someone said online

3:43

that it comes out on Amazon Prime

3:45

like tomorrow. Yeah, like, dude,

3:47

they've gone all out with the marketing. Yeah,

3:49

but it's it's a really good film.

3:51

Like it's just essentially about it's got more

3:53

of a bit of more in kind

3:55

of. investigative

3:58

intrigue to it than you of

4:00

think yeah yeah right but it's quite fascinating

4:02

it's like you know 130 dudes go

4:04

into a room it's a little bit like

4:06

the Royal Rumble 30 men enter one

4:08

man leaves yes no it's definitely like that

4:10

so do as a show because obviously

4:12

you know you're half masked everything everyone's you

4:14

know a bit depressed to the Cardinals

4:16

we get around in the black armbands they

4:18

do yeah I thought I remember watching

4:21

a documentary years ago when they elected Benedict.

4:24

So let's say that's like 2010,

4:26

no, no, 2005, I reckon. I

4:28

think JP2 went in 04.

4:31

Yeah. So, 04. Okay. Documentary. And

4:33

there was a nun. And

4:36

it was kind of interesting in that the Cardinals

4:38

were showing up for the Conclave. And

4:40

she was almost like a rock groupie. Like

4:42

she'd rock up and be like, you

4:45

know cardinal Rosenberg's I met you last week at

4:48

the thing oh and oh really yeah like

4:50

it was kind of really interesting like and they're

4:52

kind of walking by going yeah whatever mate

4:54

um but yeah it was it was really kind

4:56

of fascinating documentary and then they had a

4:58

very quick conclave which then she thought

5:00

it was Ratzenberg one of your

5:02

German mates um being elected

5:04

because they uh he was he

5:07

was kind of the favorite

5:09

going in um It's

5:11

a little bit like when Luke Darcy nearly

5:13

won the Brownlow and they had the

5:15

pub with his family. It was all getting

5:17

embarrassing. That's what they do. That's what

5:19

they do with the concave now. They cross

5:21

out to the family. They cross out

5:23

to the Goldie and the Abbot family's there.

5:26

I hope they give like the stats of

5:28

the incoming Pope, you know, like it's

5:30

five. Here's the five prospective Popes. How many,

5:32

you know, how many miracles has he

5:34

performed, you know, what's his what's his day

5:36

to day like, you know. Where

5:38

was his junior parish?

5:41

I like the idea of being like the NFL

5:43

draft as well. You know, like

5:45

the Roger Goodall will come out and just lose

5:47

the fuck out of him. And

5:50

then he comes out five rounds later and people are like, no,

5:52

we're not done yet. We're going to boo the fuck out of

5:54

you. Yeah, yeah, we're going to keep going. Have you ever seen

5:56

the Pope live? I have seen

5:58

John Paul II live in 80,

6:01

I want to say

6:03

86 at Flamington Racecourse. Yeah.

6:07

Oh, okay. Like as a part of the race day,

6:09

was he there just in the members? third. He came

6:11

third on a pre -party. I lost a lot. And

6:13

I had said maths. Flew into a

6:15

race course in 1986, 1987, I want to say. Now,

6:19

did you have to

6:21

go? Or did you go with the family? I went

6:23

with the family. didn't have to go. No, but there was

6:25

a boy and a girl from my school who were

6:27

in grade six, and they got picked to go up and

6:30

get communion from the Pope. So

6:32

they picked kids from... kind of

6:34

the local Catholic schools to go

6:36

and get communion from him. But

6:38

I think the night before he played the MCG, like

6:40

he's bigger than Guns N' Roses then. Yeah,

6:42

right. I think I have a story about

6:44

that Pope doing that tour and I

6:47

have a feeling that Rove might have high

6:49

-fived the Pope. We'll

6:52

have to clarify that. But I have a

6:54

feeling he might have gone to Perth. I think Rove

6:57

has a story about how he high -fived the Pope. Oh

6:59

my God. Of all the

7:01

things I was expecting to hear today, that

7:04

was not on my bucket list. So

7:06

he did a tour, yeah. So he did the MCG. I

7:08

don't think he said mass. I think it was more an appearance.

7:11

I mean, he should be able to fill it with that

7:13

kind of fucking membership. You've got to fucking back yourself

7:15

in at the G, don't you? Yeah. And he came out

7:17

and he said, and Melbourne,

7:19

he said, they told me

7:21

Sydney told me Melbourne didn't know how

7:24

to pray. Do

7:26

you know how to pray? Yeah. And

7:28

then he got out, everyone's favorite Catholic, Mike

7:30

Brady came out and sang a song

7:33

about God. And

7:35

I don't think I've seen

7:37

the other two. I went to the Vatican about five

7:39

years ago. And

7:41

I so wish I saw someone in a football jumper.

7:46

But that was kind of cool by the fact that I

7:48

went with my sister and her family. And so the

7:50

kids were kind of old enough to kind of know. No,

7:53

the drill and they've learned about that

7:55

stuff. I can't remember like when I was at

7:57

the Vatican Do you know is it like a timetable

7:59

of when he's going to come out? Does he do

8:01

it? Is it the Basilica that he pops out

8:03

of on the balcony? Dude, I have a story

8:05

about a man of mine years ago. So I

8:07

think he has like a weekly a weekly Sermon

8:09

kind of from the from the window. Yeah,

8:11

I don't guess the official title

8:13

Yeah, but I have a mate

8:15

years ago who told me a

8:17

story. He's mate they were in

8:20

Rome together and they just had a

8:22

day, separately. They wanted to each

8:24

do different things. And just

8:26

by chance, they bumped into each other and

8:28

my mates gone, oh, dude, I'm just heading to

8:30

the Vatican. And the guy was like, oh,

8:32

dude, don't go there. Chocoblock packed. And

8:34

he's like, oh, what's happening? And he's

8:36

like, I don't know. But there was like

8:39

this bloke in the window, given

8:41

a speech. And he

8:43

was like, I think that

8:45

might be the fucking poem. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

8:47

It's not just a random dude. Some random

8:49

dude that summoned 100 ,000 people. But

8:52

the thing I liked about the St.

8:54

Peter's, the church, is that

8:56

it's big enough that you could do... They

8:58

had various masses going on at the

9:00

same time. So it'd be a

9:02

little bit like... It's like Little League. So

9:05

you had a... Or you had a big day out.

9:07

Yeah, you had a mass going on the 50 metre line.

9:09

Then you had a mass going on on the wing. Then

9:11

you had a mass going on the Ford Pocket. And

9:14

I think that's a pretty disrespectful

9:16

way to talk about the same

9:18

penis. Yeah, it's like circle

9:20

work. But yeah, generally I have like three

9:22

or four masses going on at the same

9:24

time that people kind of would just duck

9:26

in and out of, really. Yeah,

9:29

it sounds like OzFest. Anyway,

9:33

we pay respects to you later. And

9:38

can I just say, I know I mentioned a little

9:40

story that I told in my comedy festival show. I

9:42

wanted to say a big thank you to all the

9:44

junk timers and everyone who came along to my comedy

9:46

festival show over the last couple of weeks. I had

9:48

an absolute ball and it was good to, to meet

9:50

some of the junk timers who were there. And I,

9:53

amazingly, they love sitting up the front. So I got to

9:55

meet a couple during the show. So thank you to everyone

9:58

who came along. I do appreciate it and had a lot of

10:00

fun. Thank you to you for coming as well,

10:02

man. It was really cool, man. Came along with Thursday night,

10:04

brought my little partner and a friend of mine from school, actually.

10:06

I should check here. We'd probably be sad about the Pope

10:08

as well. But I was really good fun. Now you

10:11

were talking about the story about the cops. What

10:13

was the story about that? Fucking low dog

10:15

cops. The reason I was going to bring

10:17

that up, because we're going to talk about

10:19

our esteemed friend Ricky Nixon, who's a little

10:21

run in with the five O's. But myself

10:23

last Tuesday. I was writing

10:26

to work at the front bar for the

10:28

front bar production meeting and I live in

10:30

North Fitzroy front bar production offices in Richmond

10:32

so it's a fucking nice ride straight down

10:34

Brunswick Street I go cut through East Melbourne

10:36

and I ride past the MCJ on the

10:38

way to work on the way to

10:40

a footy show it's like fucking perfect and

10:42

so I'm on if you know Melbourne in

10:44

East Melbourne I'd ridden down Brunswick Street

10:46

was crossing over Langridge Street down Elbert

10:48

Street and it's got like a

10:51

median strip in the middle So

10:53

I stopped at the red light and in the

10:55

bike lane and then kind of there was

10:57

no traffic coming halfway like on one side of

10:59

the road So I just sort of skated

11:01

my bike out to the middle Waited for the

11:04

lights to turn green and

11:06

then kept riding down Albert Street

11:08

and the cops in this

11:10

fucking undercover X5 BMW come screaming

11:12

up behind me lights going

11:14

Cyclists pull over cyclists pull over They pull me

11:16

over and I'm like, fuck it now. And

11:18

the guy gets out. You know,

11:21

when they just, you go, I'm not getting out

11:23

of this. You're one of those people who just fucking

11:25

is a hero. They're on a, they're on a

11:27

power trip. Yeah. And so

11:29

he goes, any excuse for going through that red

11:31

light? I'm like, no. And

11:33

he goes, you got any ID? And I'm like, I don't.

11:35

And so then I was like, Who do I

11:37

fucking throw under the bus here? Whose

11:39

name do I give? And then I thought, ah, this

11:41

is going to cause a fucking issue for someone else if

11:43

I lie. So anyway, it gives me

11:45

the fine. He shows me the video as he goes,

11:47

you know, this is what happened and stuff. I'm like,

11:49

whatever, fuck it. We both know we did it. Let's

11:51

just keep moving. $495.

11:56

Dude, dude. So going through

11:58

a red light on halfway through a

12:00

red light on a bike. So essentially, I

12:02

just sort of was. Riding

12:04

J walking if you will. I didn't go all

12:06

the way through and I wasn't in a car 495

12:08

bucks. That's that's a stack. That's that's actually remarkable.

12:10

I would have thought of the top my head I

12:13

would have thought 200 and something maybe yeah, I

12:15

would have thought high 200 That's what I was expecting

12:17

when it gave it to me. I just went

12:19

off fuck off And do they do the bit where

12:21

you go if you can challenge it in court? He

12:24

didn't say anything about that, but you're

12:26

old pal Rosie's gonna be fucking

12:28

challenge. Oh really? Really? Oh

12:30

fuck yeah, you gotta roll a dice

12:32

on this shit. Mate, mate, I've made, I've

12:34

done my bit for the environment. I've

12:37

been a, I've been a model cyclist for

12:39

many years, Michael. I've never run a

12:41

red light before. I just, there

12:43

was glass in the, in the cycling lane,

12:45

your honor, and I just panicked and I rode

12:47

out to the middle for the safety of

12:49

myself. You know we're recording. Yeah,

12:52

I'm gonna play this in court. You got done

12:54

for Jay walking like years ago You told the story

12:56

of the pod here down at Marvel Stadium, and

12:58

I think you actually didn't end up getting the

13:01

fine No, they never sent

13:03

me anything that was and they were real

13:05

fucking bullies about that as well because

13:07

I remember I filmed them This is before

13:09

they had body cameras. I'm like, well,

13:11

maybe I'll film it and they fucking really

13:13

told me off. Yeah, that was the

13:15

day This is how shit a day

13:17

it was. I get done for J walking

13:19

on the way into Carlton Frio in about

13:22

2015 when we kick zero goals to halftime.

13:25

And then the halftime activation, they're like, come

13:27

out and get your membership. You're like, mate,

13:29

no one don't just shut up. Just shut

13:31

up. I think the last time I got fine, I

13:33

didn't tap on on the tram. Oh,

13:35

really? Yeah. It's like, it's like about

13:37

12 years ago. And in my defensive

13:40

runner, I had come off living in

13:42

Sydney for half a year. And

13:44

so I generally had just forgotten to

13:46

tap on the tapping on it just come in

13:48

right and so in Sydney you had to if

13:50

you're on a bus or on your tram like

13:52

a train you had to kind of you have

13:54

to eat can't get on unless you tap on

13:56

so with the tram it's kind of on to

13:58

you really yes yes and yeah and they came on

14:00

to me and said you know you didn't tap on

14:02

and then one of the doors was like you know if

14:05

you want to challenge it and I was like I'm

14:08

not fucking challenging this. It's

14:10

about a hundred bucks or something. I don't

14:12

know. I think it's up to like 300 now

14:15

or something. But anyway. So anyway, junk

14:17

timers, just when you think about sort of

14:19

rolling through a halfway through a red light, I'm

14:21

here to tell you it's not a good

14:23

idea. But we were on the topic

14:25

of, you know, your friend and ours, Ricky Nixon,

14:28

who made a good hack during the

14:30

week is what happened. Yeah. Tragic.

14:33

The other cruel hackers, those cruel hackers

14:35

who. She's a pinpoint. She's a they

14:37

really they really fucking burrow into

14:39

people who already have a pretty wild

14:41

profile on Facebook and they go

14:43

How can we tap into this person's

14:46

Instability in some of the things

14:48

they say now someone social media those

14:50

there just you know post a

14:52

few you know fairly controversial things every

14:54

three three days I reckon yeah,

14:56

yeah, yeah, yeah, and then also, you

14:59

know the thing I feel about

15:01

Ricky is that he um never

15:03

been in trouble Well, that's

15:05

the thing it's a witch hunt like

15:07

you it's not it's not fair like

15:09

So is it illegal now to threaten

15:12

a police officer online now is it?

15:14

I mean it's a fucking it's a

15:16

goddamn nanny state Michael But an interesting

15:18

one as well by the fact that

15:20

seemed to be like channel seven was

15:22

there before the cops were That was

15:24

really weird that channel seven were there

15:26

for the arrest. Yeah. Yeah, and that

15:28

he wasn't punching on with Gary Ablett

15:30

in a lame while they were trying

15:32

to arrest him What's

15:34

the arrest in the bakery, do you think? I've

15:39

told the story how I went to a stand -up

15:41

show, right? Yes, yes.

15:44

So there's not a time to say

15:46

no to that. Ricky did stand up

15:48

probably 10, 15 years ago. Yeah, I

15:50

reckon. Yeah, at the Communist Land. My

15:52

friend and I went along because we

15:54

thought it'd be really funny, like

15:57

ironically, and then about two

15:59

minutes in we were like, oh no, this

16:01

is actually... funny and sad and

16:03

And people were there kind of mocking

16:05

him weren't they? A little bit. There was

16:07

a table full of young blokes that

16:09

had chicken train t -shirts on But

16:16

you know I'm the loser too I probably paid 30

16:18

bucks to go But it's been a big week

16:21

for the lawbreak is what about that kid up at

16:23

the SCG who when Aliyah Aliyah ran through the

16:25

goals He threw a little bit of a what would

16:27

you call it like a little mini banner? He

16:29

threw it at him and he's copped himself a

16:31

two -year ban from the SCG, a 16

16:33

-year -old. Yeah, six -year -old, like a two -year

16:35

ban. What was it

16:37

like a kind of like a little flag or a

16:40

little? Yeah, one of those things where you've spread

16:42

it out and it says like ghost ones

16:44

or something like that or six or four

16:46

or probably not four because you don't hit

16:48

a foreign If it is one of them

16:50

then he's old enough to know better and

16:52

then I think the band should be bigger

16:54

actually Really just for picking up picking up

16:56

one of those things like oh you're an

16:58

adult. Yeah, yeah like you've grown up mate

17:00

Like, yeah. Yeah. Um, but apparently it was

17:02

like pretty good about in terms of like,

17:04

didn't swear or anything like that. No, he

17:06

just said like, not cool man, not cool.

17:08

Yeah. Yeah. Which is a kind of cool

17:10

thing to say. Yeah. But then there was even talk,

17:12

like people were saying like the kid got locked

17:14

up for a while. which I think ended up not

17:16

being true. Yeah, I reckon because

17:18

they were like, oh, his grandfather called in to

17:20

3AW. And if you're the producer at 3AW,

17:22

you just got to ask a few questions about

17:25

that. I'll be right. Yeah. You

17:27

just go, mate, we've got his grandfather. He's fucking

17:29

in a lockup. They're like, put him on. Yeah.

17:31

I was coloring Guantanamo. I was

17:33

being deported. Yeah. It's like,

17:35

OK, just ask the first, ask yourself the

17:37

first question. Would they arrest you

17:39

and lock you up for doing

17:41

what he did? Or ask the question,

17:44

what's your grandson's name? Yeah,

17:46

yeah. Yeah, why is the grandfather calling when

17:48

the mum was beside him? A lot of

17:50

questions. It was a bit of a weird

17:52

one by the fact that... It's kind of

17:54

funny, isn't it? By the fact, I think

17:56

we would feel differently about it if it

17:58

was an adult compared a 16 -year

18:00

Absolutely. The kid, he shat himself the moment that

18:02

he literally spoke back to him and he's

18:04

just going, oh, this is fucked. So I

18:06

reckon, I reckon two years is a bit harsh,

18:09

to be honest. He's 16, fuck. When

18:11

I was 16, I was a fucking moron. Yeah, sure.

18:13

And he actually looked like not a fucking moron, too.

18:15

No. And having said that, he's a

18:17

Sponsor fan, so he's probably a Riverview.

18:20

Yes, he's true. He's probably you know

18:22

already got you know job lined up

18:24

for some kind of stockbroker company. Yeah,

18:26

he's fine. Yeah, he's fine. Yeah,

18:29

do you feel like the crowds are getting? Worse

18:32

behaved, I mean ignore

18:35

ignore ignore the bringing

18:37

guns into the ground

18:39

Well, you've always said to do that,

18:41

but I you know what I find

18:43

though is The worst thing on the

18:45

coverage is when they find one dickhead

18:47

in the crowd and they keep cutting

18:49

back to them. And my casing point

18:51

was that bloke at the North Melbourne

18:54

game on Friday versus Carlton at Marvel

18:56

for Good Friday

18:58

game. and it was

19:00

a bloke you know like an older bloke with

19:03

a goatee and he had a fucking beer and

19:05

he was just getting like more and more wound

19:07

up as the game went on yet they kept

19:09

cutting back to him and he knew that he

19:11

was on camera and so he plays up to

19:13

it yeah sure why you highlighting the fuckwits yeah

19:15

sure sure sure hey uh a bit of a

19:17

weird round of football though too hey in terms

19:19

of like it was a few upsets yeah yeah

19:21

um i didn't get to go to a hoth

19:23

on eastern monday and um it

19:25

was pretty Bloody intense the entire

19:28

game. Um, it was a

19:30

good game. Yeah. And then we, we kind

19:32

of, uh, mucked around the last five minutes

19:34

and then actually I think straight after the coverage,

19:36

they announced the Pope had died on channel

19:38

seven. So I get the feeling he was

19:40

watching. Yeah. Might have had a multi. So,

19:42

but we had, but we had like the wisdom

19:44

like missed right in front and then persistently missed

19:46

the whole thing like within like about three minutes

19:48

to go. Um, what do you think

19:51

of the good Friday game? Is that a thing

19:53

that you want to go to? Look,

19:56

I don't have an issue with it. I actually

19:58

think there should be a game on Good Friday. I

20:00

think it's weird that we play on the Sunday,

20:02

and then they're like, oh, should you play on

20:04

the Friday? So I think it's a really good

20:06

thing, and people are in town, and they've got

20:08

nothing to do. So it's really well attended. And

20:11

I think you kind of need north

20:13

just to get a little bit bit.

20:15

bit better yeah yeah I think actually

20:17

my good bigger point actually that you're

20:19

making the Good Friday in particular is the

20:21

one day there's there's literally not much

20:23

to do no and they've got 46 000

20:25

we're so it's not like they're

20:27

not going and North Melbourne flogged regularly.

20:29

So North fans are going, you know what? We're

20:32

still going to fucking go and support them. Yeah. I wake

20:34

up on Good Friday for some reason. I was starving.

20:36

I was so starving. I had to work, but I was

20:38

working from home. I was so starving.

20:40

And I went down to the shop next

20:42

door, like the supermarket, the arcade thing they have.

20:44

Nothing was open. It was shut. And I

20:46

was like, okay, I got to work. I

20:49

can't walk. I can't go for another half an

20:51

hour without, you know, to find food. And I'm

20:53

like, okay, cool. Uber Eats. Great. Okay. Get Uber

20:55

Eats. It doesn't arrive. So

20:58

I have to order again

21:00

to get it. I was so starving. And then,

21:02

okay, here's a little quick of Uber Eats. They

21:05

go, I go, hey, where's

21:07

the food? And they go, we

21:09

refunded the money. So the situation resolved.

21:12

And I'm like, no. No, it's not at

21:15

all. No, no, no, no. I ordered a meal.

21:17

I ordered a meal. These people generally did

21:19

not show up and I was tracking them and

21:21

they decided not to show up. They probably

21:23

ate my breakfast. But I just

21:25

love the idea of like the kind of the

21:27

thing of like, hey, hey, we're

21:29

refunded the money. Yeah. End of story. Have

21:31

you ever done this and I'm sure you

21:33

haven't because you're not a big enough piss

21:35

head. Have you ever ordered Uber Eats late

21:37

at night and then forgotten and then gone

21:39

to bed and then woken up and it's

21:41

out the front of your door? And

21:44

you've ordered two sets of nachos because

21:46

you wanted some backup nachos just in case.

21:49

Neither have I. Neither have I. Just,

21:52

I've heard about it, you know? But

21:54

I mean the baggers win. I

21:56

mean, heck, are we looking at the pies being the best team

21:58

in the league in the minute? Man, they

22:00

fucking smashed Brisbane. They really

22:02

did. I think, I think Brisbane,

22:05

you kind of thought, well, they're playing okay, but

22:07

geez, they're leaving some of their runs quite late

22:09

with it down at half time every time. It

22:11

wasn't a good look, but yeah, do we want

22:13

Collingwood back up the top? I mean, come on.

22:15

I mean, they had a good run, you know,

22:17

2023. Let's never speak of it again. Melbourne

22:19

get on the board. I don't

22:21

think that will be enough for their season, but

22:23

you know, good on them.

22:25

And then Crows over Giants. Yeah,

22:28

that was a solid win. I was surprised

22:30

that the Giants only kicked 34 points. Can we

22:32

talk about how terrible Frio were by the

22:34

way? I mean you've got a everyone kind of

22:36

keeps saying that Frio are ready to pop

22:38

and you go, but when? Yeah, sure. When are

22:41

they gonna do it? Sure. Like

22:43

if you're gonna pop pop and then

22:45

and then probably the big ups that

22:47

was um Richmond over the Suns. That

22:49

was unbelievable. Yeah, dude. It's

22:51

actually really entertaining around all up. Yeah,

22:53

it kind of was well unless you're

22:55

a security supporter that wasn't No, but

22:57

fucking heck it was Marcus Boncipelli actually

22:59

back after what hadn't played a game

23:01

this year and then just fucking absolutely

23:03

dominates and then I think we'll breathe

23:05

a sigh of relief as well with

23:07

Sam Darcy just yes hurting a knee

23:09

but not doing an ACL so yeah

23:11

yeah because that was actually heartbreaking like

23:13

he's mom and dad going into the

23:15

rooms after the game and um yeah

23:17

it doesn't look good another 12 months

23:19

and also you know and that was

23:21

I just wanted the starts like he

23:23

will be the future star of the

23:25

week yeah totally and um You know

23:28

that was a great win from Richmond,

23:30

but it's gonna be interesting for them.

23:32

They have to be without Noah Balter

23:34

because he has a 10 p .m curfew

23:36

as a part of his sanction Well,

23:38

I gotta imagine and I haven't looked

23:40

up the fixture, but I I'm gonna

23:42

presume they're not on nighttime as much

23:44

anymore by the fact they're not No,

23:46

they're not there's not as many but

23:48

they are playing Anzac day Eve this

23:50

Thursday night. Gotcha. Gotcha. I

23:52

Think that would be wouldn't be weird to

23:54

have a court ordered curfew Yeah,

23:57

I reckon I think anything called

23:59

ordered wouldn't be great. Oh, so

24:01

if you Okay, is it tripping

24:03

if you if you absolutely grab

24:05

him by the ankle bracelet and

24:07

not the actual ankle Oh Can

24:09

you play the first half and

24:11

they just sub him out and

24:13

get him home? Well, there was

24:15

a guy in the um The

24:17

euros last year a German player

24:19

from Emma correctly and he was

24:22

17 I think And

24:24

the law in Germany is

24:26

that people under 18 can't work

24:28

after 10 p .m. So

24:30

there's speculation they may have to

24:32

sub him at 9 .59 because

24:34

he would technically be working for

24:37

the German football team. Hey,

24:40

footballers in real life, Adam? Hit

24:42

me. We've got from

24:45

Tom. Saw Ben Brown

24:47

crossing Nicholson Street. near the Royal

24:49

Oak last Saturday. Huge bloke. Looks

24:51

like he does on the telly,

24:53

doesn't he? Yes, he does

24:55

indeed. That's near me, the

24:57

old Royal Oak. That place goes fucking off.

24:59

And he came out for a thing

25:01

on Good Friday, having a shot for goal,

25:03

and did the traditional 25K running. Oh,

25:05

great. quite fun. It was quite fun. Yeah,

25:07

fun. From Gab, my

25:10

cousin. On the drive down

25:12

from Brisbane to Burley Heads for Easter break, I said

25:14

to my husband, this holiday is

25:16

going to be a great chance To

25:19

up our AFL players in real

25:21

life game as quite a few

25:23

of the Sun's boys live around

25:25

burly Cut to woolly's metro burly

25:27

heads 5 p .m. On the

25:29

same day. We bump into Matt

25:31

Rao buying a newspaper. Holy shit

25:33

Jesus Gab didn't say that but

25:35

an actual physical newspaper. Yeah, that's

25:37

actually big deal. That's rare Look

25:39

like the Gold Coast Bulletin Basically

25:41

three pages in a Woolwich catalogue,

25:43

too easy. Jeez, the Gold Coast Bulletin.

25:45

What kind of stuff goes in there? There'd

25:49

just be a listing of which park

25:51

has been arrested on the weekend. But this

25:53

sighting with the newspaper has left him

25:55

with so many questions. What's the newspaper for?

25:57

Cat Letter Boxville? Or is

25:59

he into the cryptic crossword? Horoscopes? Checking in

26:01

if he got best on ground? And why doesn't

26:03

he have a digital subscription? Very

26:05

good question. Digital subscription rally. What's going

26:08

on? Now I've got this vision in my

26:10

head of Matt sitting solo on the

26:12

deck of his burly apartment. Newspaper spread out,

26:14

watching the waves roll in, nodding slowly

26:16

to himself. Yup, clue

26:18

one down. where

26:20

only the sun's wind and

26:22

writing in the words people's

26:24

first stadium. It's

26:26

pretty amazing that you really, really don't

26:29

hear from... Suns players do you like

26:31

I could not tell you what Matt

26:33

Rao's voice sounded like. That's actually a

26:35

good question Yeah, yeah, you know like

26:37

Ben King couldn't tell you no Anderson

26:39

would know you took Miller I don't

26:41

think I'm familiar with yeah There's just

26:44

so many players you like they are

26:46

genuine stars of the AFL and play

26:48

very well each week, but could walk

26:50

down Burke Street and just be

26:52

totally fine. I remember one of the media

26:54

this is about five years ago now but

26:56

she was telling me that the Gold Coast

26:58

sorry the the Giants were amazing for the

27:00

media in that you would call them up

27:02

and they're like before you even said can

27:05

I they go yep we're doing it yep

27:07

they were like an open book and would

27:09

just show up you know drop of a

27:11

hat to get some publicity but I'm actually

27:13

genuinely fascinated about picking up a newspaper I

27:15

can't tell you last time I bought a

27:17

physical newspaper No, like I've

27:19

been in radio stations and stuff for

27:21

in TV stations where they have a newspaper

27:23

there But I can't remember buying one.

27:25

Well, I found over the last three four

27:27

years I reckon that when I've worked

27:29

on new shows they haven't bothered to have

27:31

the newspaper Yeah, cuz you're so far

27:34

behind. Yeah, well, it's like the digital stuff

27:36

like you know Well, you get the

27:38

Herald Sun from today and doesn't have a

27:40

fucking Pope on the front does it? Like

27:43

a bloody shoot every day mate. Exactly,

27:46

that's a good point. From Ryan, a

27:48

new gym has just opened near my

27:50

place in Adelaide and Darcy Fogarty and

27:52

Ben Keys were in there to promote

27:54

the grand opening. Love it, love

27:56

it, love it. Love a footballer heading down

27:58

to a grand opening. Yeah, exactly. Seemed like

28:00

nice guys. Figured it was one off. Today

28:02

I went in and saw a poster promoting

28:04

Ben Quiz as their new ambassador and he

28:06

was in there having a chat with some

28:08

locals. And genuinely been a nice

28:10

guy. Let me know if

28:12

you want me to drop a weight plate on his horse

28:14

or something. I like

28:16

his hair, Ben Quiz. He's got

28:18

very like 1950s kind of, you

28:21

know, solid haircut. That's very beautiful,

28:23

though, the footballer ambassador, you know,

28:25

poster. There was a

28:27

couch shop. in Glenfrew Road,

28:29

Malvern. Yeah. A bunch of years ago, I

28:31

think he was playing at Melbourne at the

28:33

time and it had like a cut out,

28:35

cardboard cut out of Jordan Lewis. Oh

28:37

yeah. You know, come on down and get the bargains.

28:39

I'm Jordan Lewis and you go, I

28:41

reckon the guy who owns this

28:43

place knows Jordan Lewis. This

28:46

is very random. no, do you reckon, do you

28:48

reckon Jordy's got a free couch and he's going,

28:50

mate? Catch give me this catch.

28:53

Give me the cut out. We fucking got ourselves

28:55

a deal here. Yeah. No, you might be right.

28:57

You might be right when you say them on

28:59

Instagram with the cars Yeah, fuck man. How many

29:01

footballers around there driving a car that actually paid

29:03

for? You would

29:05

have to think at each

29:07

club Almost the first

29:09

18 would have free cars because almost

29:11

every club has a car sponsored. Don't they?

29:13

Oh, probably. Yeah, what's Hawthorne's? Good question.

29:15

Yeah, but then he gets into kind of

29:17

the wax and stuff like that as

29:19

well Like yeah, I should be genuinely curious

29:21

to do a survey. How many footballers

29:24

are driving a car that they actually paid

29:26

for? I mean, I don't

29:28

talk about that shit on the agenda status

29:30

today. No, I know the fucking big questions

29:32

from Pat front bar stuff and also to

29:34

if you sorry to cut you off there,

29:36

but if you Just like a

29:38

real card nut and you go fuck it out

29:40

like if you have played for Port Adelaide

29:42

you go I've got to get around in an

29:44

MG mate. Fuck. I don't really want to

29:46

but it's a fucking half electric hybrid kind of

29:48

weird car or you know you're playing for

29:50

the Sydney Swans you got to get around in

29:53

your little fucking VW Golf. Yeah yeah sure

29:55

but it's just like they've given me the top

29:57

end of the line it's 80 grand and

29:59

I don't have to pay for it oh you

30:01

really twist my arm fellas. Yeah that's a

30:03

fair point but you know like when when might

30:06

still be when Richmond is sponsored by Jeep. Like

30:09

you go, yeah, I could get in a fucking

30:11

Jeep. I make it happen. I like Melbourne sponsored

30:13

by Jaguar. I mean, fucking hell. You don't see

30:15

many Jags on the road though, do you? No,

30:18

a friend of the show, Tommy Little used

30:20

to have a Jag. Really? I only know

30:22

one guy who has one and it's like

30:24

a vintage kind of... The old school ones?

30:26

like one of my mates' dads who's had

30:28

it for like, you know, 30 years. Yeah,

30:30

yeah. That's probably from the 1970s, I reckon.

30:33

Oh yeah, I know the shape. Yeah. From

30:35

Pat, front bar staff in real

30:37

life. Do you get to mention Rosie? I

30:40

was catching my Qantas flight to

30:42

Perth economy, using points, doing very okay.

30:45

When I saw friends of the show, Laurence Mooney,

30:47

Danny McGinlay, and the great man, Rosie. Here

30:49

we go. Rewading at gate 21

30:51

for their flight to Adelaide for their

30:53

trip slash junket to gather round. It

30:57

was a great day. You

30:59

know, I should have come over and said good day, Pat. Underrated,

31:02

Adelaide Airport. Uh,

31:05

yeah, it's not bad. Yeah, it's not bad. I'll

31:07

give you that. I will give you that. There's a

31:09

cafe as you're heading towards your gates, which I

31:11

reckon is pretty solid. Get through the gate, don't have

31:13

to walk a million miles. And then also, uh,

31:16

let me think last time I was there, uh,

31:18

about second last time I was

31:20

there after the Hawthorne Port Final

31:22

last year, uh, probably was going

31:25

to catch my plane, probably nine

31:27

AM, I reckon, and there was

31:29

a pianist. Oh,

31:31

entertaining the crowd. Yeah. I

31:34

busted out the clarinet. We

31:36

had a delightful little duet. From

31:38

Mali, my husband and I were at

31:40

our local in brackets Oakley Bunnings. On

31:42

this is that date to partake in

31:44

the traditional getting five sausages and bread

31:46

and a can of coke to the

31:48

local community organization. And lo and behold,

31:51

who do we see in the car park? It's

31:53

the whiz Warwick. Yeah.

31:55

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh

31:58

man. He was loading

32:00

stuff into what can I only can assume

32:02

is his Well, we

32:04

drew still out on that. He

32:06

was decked out in only the

32:08

Wizards favorite attire, short shorts and tank

32:11

top. We decided to leave him

32:13

be. That's amazing. That is fantastic. What

32:15

that is, what football is in

32:17

real life is all about. I can't

32:19

even remember if we've had a

32:21

spotting of the Wiz in real life.

32:24

I think we have. Yeah, that's amazing.

32:26

for the Wizards shop and bunnings

32:28

from the short shorts, tank top. I'm

32:31

hoping hoping shorts were like leopard skin. I'm hoping

32:33

they were. What have you been buying supplies for?

32:35

I know it's a shame that he sold it

32:37

because would have been if he was buying supplies

32:39

for the brothel. Ah, yeah, sure, sure. Yeah, because

32:41

when he was going to have the, um, monthly

32:44

barbecues. Yes, yes. Yeah, because,

32:46

you know, every guy who walks

32:48

out of a brothel just

32:50

wants to, you know, stand

32:52

around and a snack and a chop. Oh,

32:58

dude. Okay. Okay,

33:00

everyone, keep an eye out for the whiz. Oh,

33:02

I almost to go down to Oakley

33:04

Bunnings on Saturday. check it out. Yeah, Yeah,

33:06

it's worth it. Hey, yeah, we're to

33:08

hear the road. We are Dr. Murphy Podd,

33:10

GMO, Twitter, Facebook, and the Ram. Go

33:12

Hoops. Go Pope. We