0:00

Welcome to Quick Brain. Bites-sized

0:02

brain hacks for busy people

0:04

who want to learn faster

0:07

and achieve more. I'm your

0:09

coach, Jim Quick. Free. You're not.

0:11

Let's imagine if we could access

0:14

100% of our brain's capacity. I

0:16

wasn't high, wasn't wired, just clear.

0:18

I knew what I needed to

0:21

do and how to do it. I

0:23

know comfort. Show me. Welcome

0:25

back Quick Brains. I am your

0:28

host and your brain coach Jim

0:30

Quick. Today we'll discover how to

0:32

reset your stress. Chances are everything

0:34

good in life was created because

0:36

of a little stress. A healthy

0:38

amount of stress is important because

0:40

it's an adaptive response to life's

0:43

demands. It serves a very functional

0:45

purpose to move your life forward.

0:47

The key is to figure out

0:49

how much stress is too much

0:51

stress for you and when it

0:53

becomes out of tune with the

0:56

frequency of your life. Our

0:58

guest today is Dr. Adidi

1:00

Nurakar, a Harvard physician, speaker,

1:02

and television correspondent. She was

1:04

recently named 100 women to

1:07

know in America for her

1:09

work in redefining stress, burnout,

1:11

and mental health in the

1:13

new normal. Before becoming a

1:15

physician specializing in stress, Dr.

1:18

Adidi was a stressed patient

1:20

looking for answers. She is

1:22

the best-selling author of this

1:24

book, which I'm, if you're watching

1:26

us on YouTube, showing a copy of

1:29

it, the five resets, rewire your brain,

1:31

and body for less stress and more

1:33

resilience. Welcome to the show, Dr. Aditi.

1:35

Jim, I'm such a fan of yours

1:37

for years and years. Thank you so

1:39

much for having me. I'm curious. How

1:41

does our brain respond to stress? Because

1:44

I want to go into strategies, but

1:46

I want people to understand the consequence.

1:48

So how does our brain respond to

1:51

stress and what happens to the brain

1:53

when we are, when we undergo long

1:55

periods of chronic stress without a reset?

1:57

You know Jim. So much of your

2:00

work and my work, there's such an

2:02

overlay, like a really beautiful connection there.

2:04

So when you are feeling a sense

2:07

of acute stress, so short. stress, your

2:09

brain and your body are actually expertly

2:11

designed to handle the short bursts of

2:14

stress. And your stress center, something that

2:16

you talk about a lot in your

2:18

work, is your amygdala. It's that small

2:20

almond-shaped structure deep in your brain, what

2:23

we call in medicine, reptilian brain, meaning

2:25

it's the part of your brain that

2:27

hasn't fully developed. And there's another part

2:30

of your brain, if you put your

2:32

hand on your forehead. Again, this is

2:34

something you talk about a lot, your

2:36

prefrontal cortex. And that prefrontal cortex governs

2:39

things like memory, planning, organization. And that's

2:41

what you're, that's very much online when

2:43

you're feeling, you know, a sense of

2:46

resilience under quote unquote normal circumstances. So

2:48

very much we are living in the

2:50

new normal and most of us aren't

2:52

really being led by the prefrontal cortex.

2:55

For most of us now, it is

2:57

not really acute short-term stress, but really

2:59

long-term chronic stressors. And so therefore that

3:02

amygdala has really taken over that amygdala

3:04

where your stress... response lives the fight

3:06

or flight response is cave person mode.

3:08

It's focused on survival and self-preservation. So

3:10

when you think back to evolutionarily with

3:12

our human brains, that fight or flight

3:14

response has a really important role. You

3:17

would be, you know, we were all

3:19

tri-speople, cave people living in the forest.

3:21

You would see a tiger. You would

3:23

either fight the tiger, but you would

3:25

run away from the tiger. That's where

3:27

fight or flight comes from. And now

3:30

we have lots of

3:32

metaphorical tigers. Relationship constraintsrates.

3:34

bills that we are really struggling

3:36

with financial constraints, climate disasters, humanitarian

3:38

crises, everything in the palm of

3:41

our hands, right? Like every headline,

3:43

it's just a flurry, and it's

3:45

this cascade and onslaught of constant

3:47

stressors that never really seem to

3:49

go away. And so those tigers

3:52

are everywhere all around us, and

3:54

so therefore your amygdala, that stress

3:56

response, kind of always stays on

3:58

in the background. Now, like I

4:00

said at the start, your brain and

4:02

your body can handle short bursts of

4:05

stress. We're actually built for that. But

4:07

they're not as good at handling these

4:09

long-term stressors that just go on and

4:11

on. Your brain has to come back

4:13

to equilibrium. And your amygdala, if it's

4:16

staying on for long periods of time,

4:18

it leads to chronic stress, which causes

4:20

all sorts of problems, and in turn

4:22

can lead to burn out. And many

4:24

of our listeners that they're listening

4:27

and they want to know more

4:29

about the five resets, and I

4:31

highly recommend everybody get their copy

4:33

of the book. What are your

4:36

go-to simple daily practices that you

4:38

recommend that kids significantly improve mental

4:40

clarity, emotional resilience? What are some

4:43

of your favorites to recommend? You know,

4:45

so the premise of the five resets

4:47

is that not all stress is bad.

4:49

There are actually two kinds of stress.

4:51

There's healthy productive stress. Like... getting a

4:54

new job, getting promoted, falling

4:56

in love, having a baby, buying

4:58

a new home, rooting for your

5:00

favorite sports team. These are positive

5:02

stressors that are actually considered healthy

5:05

stress for your brain and body.

5:07

In science, we call this adaptive

5:09

stress. Now there's another kind of

5:11

stress, unhealthy stress, scientifically known as

5:14

maladaptive stress. What gets you into

5:16

the doctor's office with various symptoms.

5:18

You know, there's so many brain

5:20

and body manifestations, so many physical

5:23

and mental healths. manifestations of that

5:25

unhealthy maladaptive stress. And so what

5:27

the five resets does is

5:29

really a tool to help you move

5:32

away from that maladaptive. unhealthy stress

5:34

and back to healthy levels. Because

5:36

the goal of life is not

5:38

to live a life with zero

5:40

stress, it's actually biologically impossible. And

5:42

we can get into like mechanistically,

5:45

how is it biologically impossible? With

5:47

the cortisol, that stress hormone, etc.

5:49

But really, the five resets will

5:51

help you transform your relationship to

5:53

stress because it will bring that

5:55

stress that runaway unbridled, unhealthy stress

5:57

that is unchecked back to healthy.

6:00

level so that you can finally get

6:02

out of that survival mode and back

6:04

to thriving. And what I have done

6:06

at this particular book is there's five

6:09

key mindset shifts and then in each

6:11

is like anywhere from two to three

6:13

prescriptions for managing stress. Everything is science

6:16

backed of course. It's all cost free

6:18

and time efficient. Those are really important

6:20

to me, those kind of pillars. I

6:22

love how you address mindset and while

6:25

you're giving the methods a lot of

6:27

people. you know, want the instructions, but

6:29

they don't, they're not making the shift

6:31

in terms of their beliefs, the things

6:33

that are holding them, maybe even stuck

6:35

in a certain way. Yeah, let's go

6:38

into a couple of them. Yeah, and

6:40

I feel like your work just focuses

6:42

so beautifully on mindset and the limiting

6:44

beliefs, you know, limitless, of course, right,

6:46

is that what we're all trying to

6:49

achieve. All of the book is meant

6:51

to get you out of a mixed

6:53

dilemma mode and back to the

6:55

prefrontal cortex. When you are feeling

6:57

a sense of stress, you are

6:59

likely saying to yourself, what is

7:01

the matter with me? Why do

7:03

I feel like this? What's the

7:05

matter with me? And instead, the

7:07

first reset asks you to reframe

7:09

that inner dialogue. It's less about

7:11

what's the matter with me and

7:13

rather what matters most to me.

7:15

And now most is not this

7:17

existential big ask. It is a

7:19

very concrete thing, but using the

7:21

brain and the biology of

7:23

neuroplasticity and brain and changing

7:26

your brain. And so M

7:28

most is an acronym. M

7:30

stands for motivating O objective,

7:32

S small enough to guarantee success, and

7:34

T timely. You pick a goal that's

7:36

within two to three months, you know,

7:39

of a time frame that you can

7:41

achieve, something very doable, something

7:43

that you've wanted to do

7:45

for your mental health or

7:47

physical health for ultimately less

7:49

stress like. you want to get to bed

7:51

earlier, you want to have more energy, so you

7:53

can look for a new job, maybe you have

7:55

a toxic boss. You know, there's so many examples

7:57

that I can give you of most goals, and

7:59

so the... first reset is about how do

8:01

you craft that most goal because that

8:03

most goal it takes about two to

8:06

three months to achieve simply because it

8:08

takes eight weeks to build a habit

8:10

right it's like that's the neural wiring

8:12

in the brain circuits it takes eight

8:14

weeks understand that falling off and getting

8:16

back on is part of habit formation

8:18

and so when you create your most

8:20

goal that is the first step to

8:23

getting out of amygdala mode and back

8:25

to the prefrontal cortex. And then there's

8:27

several strategies in that first reset to

8:29

help you actually operationalize that most goal.

8:31

Like how do you live it into

8:33

your life? How do you bring it

8:35

into your life? And so I talk

8:37

about the backwards plan and there's several

8:40

other strategies that are all science back

8:42

that can help you get out of

8:44

that immediate need of survival and danger.

8:46

Again, it's not you, it's your biology

8:48

of stress. You know, it's doing exactly

8:50

what it should. And so that's sort

8:52

of the first reset. getting clear at

8:54

what matters most by creating your most

8:57

goal. And then the rest is various

8:59

other strategies. So the second reset

9:01

is find your quiet in a

9:03

noisy world, reset number three, sink

9:05

your brain to your body, reset

9:07

number four, come up for air,

9:10

and reset number five is bring

9:12

your best self forward. The subtitle

9:14

of your book is Rewiring

9:16

Your Brain and Body for

9:18

Less Stress and More Resilience.

9:20

I'm curious, I feel like

9:22

a lot of us have

9:24

been programmed from a young

9:26

age that tolerating a high

9:28

level of discomfort and holding

9:30

it together equals resilience. How

9:32

do you define resilience? And

9:34

what's the key there? The

9:36

true scientific definition of resilience.

9:38

is your innate biological ability

9:41

to adapt, recover, and grow

9:43

in the face of life's

9:45

challenges. So, innately, we are

9:47

all resilient. Adapt, recover, and grow.

9:50

I like that. In the face of

9:52

life's challenges. But what has happened over

9:54

the years, particularly over the last, I

9:56

would say four to five years, is

9:58

that there is a new. definition

10:01

of resilience. That's like

10:03

sinister and that is

10:05

toxic resilience. And what is

10:07

toxic resilience? If you compare

10:10

the two, toxic resilience is

10:12

a mind over matter mindset.

10:14

It's productivity at all costs.

10:16

It's all systems go all

10:19

the time. Whereas true

10:21

resilience, it's true resilience,

10:23

honors your human

10:25

limitations. understand your brain

10:27

and body's ability for rest and recovery.

10:29

We talked about that, right? Like it's

10:31

a biological need, not a nice to

10:34

have luxury for rest and recovery. And

10:36

so toxic resilience, when you hear the

10:38

word resilience now, you know, I really

10:40

grappled Jim when I was writing

10:43

the book and trying to think of

10:45

what would be a good subtitle that

10:47

would really encompass a lot of this

10:49

work. I struggled, I thought, no, I

10:51

can't use the word resilience on the

10:53

cover, because that word is so cringy.

10:56

I hear the word and I have

10:58

a visceral response. It is truly cringe-worthy

11:00

because you have heard it over and

11:02

over, particularly the last few years when

11:04

people have said to you, maybe it's

11:06

a demanding boss, maybe it's someone in

11:08

your family. Oh, you can handle that.

11:11

You're resilient. Oh, you can take on

11:13

another deadline. You're resilient. Oh, you know,

11:15

you should be able to care for

11:17

your kids and work because you're resilient,

11:20

right? Like you hear this messaging over

11:22

and over. embodiment of toxic resilience. Here

11:24

in the US we have the energizer

11:26

bunny, like just keep going, no matter

11:29

what, just keep going in the UK,

11:31

keep calm and carry on every culture.

11:33

And so really a lot of my

11:35

work is aimed to dismantle

11:38

this idea of toxic resilience so we

11:40

can get back to true resilience because

11:42

the science shows you know when

11:44

I went through my stress struggle dream

11:47

I was a medical resident

11:49

and working 80 hours a week and I

11:51

was taught. you know pressure makes diamonds. So

11:53

when the going got tough in my medical

11:55

training I was like a diamond in the

11:58

making and then my diamond cracked. I went

12:00

to go see my doctor and she said,

12:02

oh, everything's great. You know, you're, it's just

12:04

stress. You're resilient. In fact,

12:06

my first response wasn't, oh no,

12:08

what should I do? I have

12:10

a lot of stress. It was

12:12

stress. Stress wasn't happen to people

12:14

like me. I'm resilient. Because I

12:16

was living the resilience myth, which

12:18

now I know 25 years later,

12:20

what is the resilience myth? It's

12:22

essentially this idea that resilient people

12:24

don't get stressed. and resilient people

12:26

don't get burned out. But I

12:28

just shared the scientific definition of

12:30

resilience, which is that it is

12:32

our innate biological ability. And the

12:34

science shows that in fact, that

12:36

is a myth that resilient people,

12:38

of course, feel stressed and burned

12:41

out, especially now, we know that

12:43

resilience is protective, but it is

12:45

not enough to prevent. burnout. And

12:47

so a lot of my work

12:49

really focuses on moving our societal

12:51

norms and expectations away from this

12:54

idea of toxic resilience and back

12:56

to true resilience where we can really

12:58

flourish. I'm curious, do you have

13:00

a mindfulness or a meditation practice

13:03

and then second part of the

13:05

question is how Do these practices

13:07

wire our brain and what changes

13:09

might someone expect to see in

13:11

maybe they're cognitive performance or it

13:13

was dressed with regular practice? That's

13:15

a great question. A lot of

13:18

my work focuses on the mind

13:20

body connection and the mind body

13:22

connection in very simple terms is

13:24

that your brain and your body

13:26

are inextricably linked and in constant

13:28

communication. What's good for your body

13:30

is good for your brain and

13:32

vice versa. if you are hearing

13:34

about the mind-body connection for the

13:36

first time, you might be hearing

13:38

the term, but you've been feeling

13:40

it since, essentially since birth. So

13:42

sweaty palms when you're giving a

13:44

talk or a big moment when

13:46

you were going to see your

13:48

prom or something and you felt

13:50

those sweaty bombs and you were nervous.

13:52

Or your heart beating in your

13:54

chest before you're about to do something

13:56

really important. Or butterflies falling

13:59

in love. life we felt the

14:01

mind-body connection at work. It's like gravity,

14:03

it's all around us. The beauty of

14:05

the mind-body connection is not only the

14:07

first step is you become aware of

14:10

it, so once you see it you

14:12

can't unsee it, but not only can

14:14

we just see it and know that

14:16

it exists, but we can actually do

14:18

things to influence it so it can

14:21

serve you. And so yes, I have

14:23

had a... mindfulness practice. I've been a

14:25

long time meditator. I started, it was

14:27

probably one of the first things that

14:29

I learned to do when I was

14:31

in my stress struggle, meditation, mindfulness, meditation,

14:33

but there have been patients of mine

14:36

who have said, I can't sit still,

14:38

I can't meditate. So, you know, trying

14:40

to decrease your stress shouldn't cause you

14:42

more stress. And so instead, if you

14:44

aren't someone who is into meditation or

14:46

sitting still, or if you've tried it's

14:48

not for you, try movement meditation. You

14:51

can tap into your mind body

14:53

connection that way as well. Walk,

14:55

you know, spend five to 10

14:57

minutes every day walking, articulate your

14:59

feet on the floor as you

15:02

walk. Understand that your feet have

15:04

30 bones and 100 muscles. There's

15:06

a lot of grounding power in

15:08

your feet. are. In the five

15:11

resets I offer a couple of

15:13

different strategies for movement meditation. One

15:15

is this idea of sticky feet

15:17

so you can, you know, focus

15:19

on your feet on the floor,

15:22

think of them as sticky webs,

15:24

and it helps kind of ground

15:26

you. Another way to tap into

15:29

your mind-body connection is simply

15:31

focusing on a three-second brain

15:33

reset that I talk about a

15:35

lot called stop. Breathe. Breathe. and

15:38

you just be, you ground yourself in

15:40

this present moment. I practice stop, read

15:42

B, right before I clicked. Join Jim

15:44

for the interview today. I practice it

15:46

all day, every day. It gets you

15:48

out of that what if thinking, which

15:50

is like that amygdala and anxiety

15:53

and you know, fight or flight, doom

15:55

and gloom, because anxiety is a

15:57

future focused emotion, right? It's not

15:59

about them. It's about like, what

16:01

if, what if. And Stop Breathe

16:03

gets you out of that, what

16:05

if thinking, and back to what

16:07

is in the here and the

16:10

now. And when you practice it

16:12

over and over and over again,

16:14

it helps to rewire your brain,

16:16

tap into the mind-body connection, and

16:18

can help reset your stress. And

16:21

I think, you know, the reason

16:23

that it all works the way

16:25

it does. Why stop Breathe be

16:27

works, why movement meditation, why... Mindfulness

16:29

meditation, sitting meditation, how does it

16:32

happen to your mind-body connection? The

16:34

common denominator here is your breath.

16:36

Your breath is the only physiological

16:38

mechanism that is under voluntary control

16:40

and involuntary control. Your heartbeat can't

16:42

do that. Your brain waves can't

16:45

do that. Your digestion can't do

16:47

that. Only your breath. So you

16:49

and I can sit here and

16:51

we can practice stop breathe B.

16:53

And then when we're just hanging

16:56

out and talking. your breath is

16:58

going on in the background. And

17:00

so that is why the breath

17:02

is such a wonderful and powerful

17:04

gateway to tap into your mind

17:07

body connection. Amazing. Ten this episode,

17:09

I'd love to ask you, is

17:11

there one thing that you are

17:13

currently learning or studying that is

17:15

exciting for you? There is. You

17:18

know, I have been an expert

17:20

in this field. of mental health,

17:22

stress, burnout, resilience for quite a

17:24

while. And since writing this book,

17:26

I've been out there and speaking

17:28

and engaging with audiences. And so

17:31

one thing that was really important

17:33

to me, particularly this year, when

17:35

my work is really ramped up

17:37

as a quote-unquote expert, is to

17:39

become a student again, because we

17:42

know that that has huge brain

17:44

benefits, and so I have been

17:46

doing lots of things. learning French,

17:48

for example, getting, you know, getting

17:50

really fit with weights and lifting

17:53

heavy weights and really focusing on

17:55

being a beginner and having that

17:57

beginner's mind, because it is so

17:59

refreshing to do things that you

18:01

really are a novice at and

18:03

learning and feeling. and laughing at

18:06

yourself and getting back up and

18:08

trying again. Just for the love

18:10

of learning something new. And so

18:12

to those listening, I would encourage

18:14

you if, you know, stress or

18:17

burnout or all these things sound

18:19

very like, I'll never get there,

18:21

it's too far away. Try it,

18:23

have that sense of a beginner's

18:25

mind and try it because you

18:28

might surprise yourself. The same way

18:30

I have surprised myself this year

18:32

with the various things that I've

18:34

been learning. Everyone should go get

18:36

their copy of the five resets,

18:38

rewire your brain and body for

18:41

less stress and more resilience. Where

18:43

can people stay in touch with

18:45

you, go deeper with your work

18:47

besides the book, obviously? You can

18:49

follow me on all social platforms

18:52

at Dr. Adidi-N-E-R-U-R-K-A-R, and you can

18:54

also check out my website. 5resets.com,

18:56

number 5resets.com, and also Dr. Adedi,

18:58

D-R-A-D-I-T-I, dot com. Awesome. Well, as

19:00

always, we'll put this, all that

19:03

in the show notes, a very

19:05

popular page. Go to jimquick.com/notes. We'll

19:07

put it in addition to the

19:09

summary, all the links to your

19:11

social media, to your website, to

19:14

your book, and... I just want

19:16

to remind everyone, as always, you

19:18

can find out more ways to

19:20

fuel your brain's potential on our

19:22

YouTube channel. That's where we put

19:24

the extended version of this conversation.

19:27

So we put 20 minutes. We

19:29

keep it quick on all the

19:31

audio channels, but on YouTube. You

19:33

can join 1.8 million subscribers there

19:35

and watch the entire episode, the

19:38

extended version, if you will. Make

19:40

sure you hit the subscribe button

19:42

and leave a comment under this

19:44

episode. I speedread every single one

19:46

of them, and so we would

19:49

love to know your thoughts. And

19:51

until next time, this is your

19:53

brain coach Jim Quick. Be limitless.