0:00

This is NPR's life kit.

0:02

I'm Mary El Segara. I

0:05

keep it to do list on a notepad on

0:07

my desk. When I looked at it recently,

0:09

I noticed something. It's kind of all

0:11

over the place. On a given day,

0:13

it might read. Make allergist

0:15

appointment. Buy razors. Retile

0:18

kitchen floor. Throw out compost.

0:21

Microblading question mark. Microblading

0:24

by the way. Is something you do to make your eyebrows

0:26

look fuller. It's like a tattoo that lasts

0:29

a couple of years. I mean, the list

0:31

is filled with tasks, but

0:33

some are big and some are small. Some

0:35

are urgent and some are definitely

0:37

not. Some, I'm not even sure should be

0:39

on there, like the microblading, which

0:42

I've frantically scribbled down after

0:44

the lady at my eyebrow threading salon

0:46

asked who messed up my eyebrows so bad.

0:49

Hi. That was me and tweezer.

0:52

But yeah, I've just never felt like I had a good system

0:54

for making it to do list and deciding what

0:56

goes on it. And don't think I'm alone

0:58

in that. So today on the show, we

1:00

are exploring how to make a better to

1:02

do list because it's a new

1:04

year. There's a lot we wanna do.

1:06

And a well made to do list can help

1:09

when you make a to do list that's

1:11

aligned intentionally with what you want out of your

1:13

life, it's really powerful.

1:16

We'll teach you how to break down your goals into

1:18

actionable tasks, and to figure out

1:20

a to do list system that works for you.

1:24

So to do list, they're a tool we use

1:27

to get stuff done. Right? And I mean,

1:29

how good does it feel when you finally cross

1:31

off that task because it's been hanging over your

1:33

head? But warning todo

1:35

list can also become a trap. They

1:37

can feed our impulse to stay productive

1:39

at all times. The thing

1:42

is we don't wanna make a better to do list

1:44

just so we can indiscriminately accomplish

1:46

more. It's about doing what matters.

1:49

That's Angel Trinidad, the CEO and

1:51

founder of passion planner, a company

1:53

that makes digital and paper planners that

1:55

show people how to break down their goals into

1:57

day to day actions. You can access

1:59

a free version of the planner on their website.

2:02

So takeaway number one in making

2:04

better to do list, as Angel was saying,

2:06

decide what matters to you in this moment.

2:09

Because wouldn't it be great to fill our to do lists

2:11

with intention? So the stuff on them

2:13

is actually helping us get somewhere, One

2:16

way to do this is to come up with a big picture

2:18

goal, something that's especially important

2:20

to you right now, something that would make a big

2:22

impact in your life. Angel

2:24

calls it a game changer. What is that

2:26

one thing that would make everything

2:29

easier, better? And that

2:31

answer is different for everyone. To

2:33

come up with that goal, ask yourself

2:35

some questions. What do I wanna be?

2:37

What do I wanna experience? And what do I wanna have?

2:40

Maybe you wanna be more present in your

2:42

physical body. If so, your goal

2:44

could be to run A5K or

2:46

maybe you wanna give back to your community.

2:48

So your goal is to volunteer once a

2:50

week. Or you want to become a doctor.

2:52

So your goal, take the mcat.

2:55

Now sometimes, you don't choose the goal.

2:57

Life hands it to you. Like sometimes

2:59

your parent is sick or sometimes

3:02

your dog is sick or maybe

3:04

you need to find a job or else you're not gonna

3:07

eat. And that might be your reality for

3:09

now. Whatever it is, once

3:11

you have a goal, you'll break it down into

3:13

actionable steps and deadlines to

3:15

put on your to do list. And we'll get to

3:17

that. First though, I want to acknowledge

3:19

this goal making approach might feel

3:21

kind of top down. Like, maybe you

3:23

don't have a big picture goal in mind yet.

3:26

And that's okay. Oliver Berkman

3:28

is a journalist and author. He wrote the

3:30

book four thousand weeks time management

3:33

for mortals. At how many weeks are in the

3:35

average human

3:35

life, by the way. And he says another

3:37

option is to let your current to do list

3:39

guide you. There are various exercises out

3:41

there that you might the one that involves asking

3:44

why five times in succession.

3:46

For instance, my to do list says retail

3:49

kitchen floor. Oliver says

3:51

I could work backwards from there. So,

3:53

like, I want to retell

3:55

my floor why to make that room

3:57

look better why. And eventually,

3:59

you hopefully get to something that feels like

4:01

a bedrock value of your life. And if you don't,

4:03

maybe that's a sign that it's a kind of

4:05

a zombie project that could be easily

4:08

abandoned. Another tip from Oliver. Look

4:10

at the stuff that's filling your to do list at the moment

4:12

and ask, these choices enlarge

4:15

me or diminish me? He says

4:17

this question comes from the psychotherapist James

4:19

Hollis, and he finds it really clarifying.

4:22

And more useful than asking something

4:24

like, is this making me happy?

4:26

You know, lots of life is not so

4:28

happy, but can be really meaningful.

4:31

And plenty of pleasures are kind of shallow and

4:33

pointless and you don't want to fill up your life with

4:35

them. But does this enlarge me?

4:37

Well, let's use work as an example. Maybe

4:39

your job right now is hard, but

4:41

is it the kind of hard that's helping you grow

4:43

as a person and develop skills

4:46

or is it the pointless kind of hard? If

4:48

it's the latter, maybe it's time to add

4:50

update resume and pick three jobs

4:52

to apply to to your to do list.

4:55

Once you have a sense of your priorities

4:57

and your goals, it's time for takeaway

5:00

Pick a system, a way of make you

5:02

to do list that works for you. One

5:04

question to get you started, paper

5:06

or digital. Angel

5:08

says some people like paper to do list because

5:11

they're

5:11

concrete. And tactile. And

5:13

what I also love about to do is on paper is

5:15

when you cross it off, there's nothing

5:18

like it. Also, paper comes

5:20

to an end. When you put it digitally,

5:22

there's no end. You can keep going. And I

5:24

think that's when to do list get really overwhelming. It's

5:26

kind of like a cluttered room. When

5:28

it's too much, then you just avoid it completely.

5:30

Digital has its pluses though. If you

5:32

make a to do list on your phone, it's searchable

5:35

and quite possibly more organized. If

5:37

you do choose digital, there are lots of websites

5:39

and apps you can try. Some are built

5:41

into your phone, some you can download.

5:44

Folks on a live kit team have used the free

5:46

versions of to do list notion,

5:48

Asana, and Trello. Another

5:51

question to ask yourself, how do you want

5:53

to structure your to do list? Some

5:55

people prefer a kind of calendar approach.

5:57

With the hours of the day listed. I like to

6:00

time block on my

6:02

agenda and it's literally making a

6:04

square of time for the

6:06

task. So you know, Thursday from

6:08

two PM to six PM, I'll be working

6:10

on my novel. Wednesday from

6:12

seven to eight PM, I'll be at soccer practice.

6:15

Friday from five to five thirty,

6:17

I'll be cleaning my apartment. This

6:19

method is called time boxing, and it

6:21

can be good way to understand how much you

6:23

can realistically tackle in a day. Since

6:25

you're visually blocking off time for

6:27

each of your to dos. That

6:29

kind of awareness gets you thinking, am

6:31

I spending my time in a way That makes

6:34

sense for me and what my

6:36

intention is for my life. But again, this

6:38

is about finding a system that works for

6:39

you. For Oliver. Trying to

6:42

plan this way feels too rigid.

6:44

I've never really found it works to make a

6:46

very rigorous association between a task

6:48

and the time of day. Because

6:50

my moods, my responsibilities as

6:52

a parent, random emergencies that

6:54

arise. You just can't sort of say,

6:56

I'm absolutely going to be doing this thing between

6:58

three and three forty. You have to with appointments

7:01

and things, but if you try and do it with everything, very

7:03

quickly, it feels imprisoning, it feels

7:05

like life isn't isn't any fun

7:07

anymore even if you're working on things that matter.

7:10

So another option is a straight

7:12

up list of tasks, call me old

7:14

fashioned, but that's what I'm sticking with. Remember,

7:16

by the way, whatever you pick, it's

7:18

just a starting point. An important thing here

7:20

is to feel like your systems

7:22

for organizing your life can

7:24

evolve constantly. Now once you

7:26

have a system in mind, take away three.

7:29

It's time to fill your list. Let's

7:31

start with an acknowledgement. There are

7:33

some things you just have to get done. The

7:35

tasks of daily living. Refill

7:38

that

7:38

prescription. Buy groceries. Get

7:40

more toilet paper. Those tasks

7:42

can go on your to do list. They

7:44

don't necessarily have to. There's this

7:46

thing within the productivity world called

7:48

the two minute rule, and it's if it

7:50

takes less than two minutes, just do it right then, you

7:52

know, it's not worth spending the bandwidth

7:55

to write it down, hopefully

7:57

remember it, hopefully do it. You could

7:59

also consider automating some of these things,

8:01

so they never make the to do list at all. Like,

8:03

maybe you have toilet paper delivered to your house

8:05

once a month. You're gonna need it.

8:08

Okay. So we're meeting our daily needs. Now

8:10

we wanna reflect our bigger goals

8:12

on our to do list. Like, maybe

8:14

one of mine is to redecorate my

8:16

apartment. The thing is, and this is

8:18

what trips a lot of people

8:19

up. That's not a to do list

8:21

item. So often

8:23

things hang around on our to do lists,

8:25

and we don't get them done. Because

8:28

we're not even expressing them in a

8:30

doable form. Let's break this down.

8:32

Which parts of the apartment do I

8:34

want to redecorate? Well, Definitely the

8:36

kitchen. I wanna replace the tile

8:38

floor. Still not actionable

8:40

enough. We're gonna have to go even

8:42

smaller. Call the hardware store

8:44

for an estimate. Now that's doable.

8:47

Go look at tile. That's doable.

8:49

Order the tile. Also doable. These

8:51

are the kind of things to on your list

8:53

or in your planner. Oliver

8:55

says you also might consider limiting

8:57

your to do list to four or five

9:00

doable tasks at a

9:01

time. And you're not gonna add a new one to

9:03

that list until you've moved one away,

9:05

thereby freeing up a slot. That can help you

9:07

stay focused because you can't do

9:09

everything at once. And that's

9:11

takeaway for. Pick something

9:13

to let go. In his

9:15

book, Oliver talks about the art of creative

9:18

neglect. You borrowed that phrasing from

9:20

graphic novelist and creativity coach

9:22

Jessica Abel. You're gonna

9:24

be not excelling.

9:26

On a whole load of dimensions.

9:28

If you're gonna be like a

9:30

really good parent and a really good

9:33

employee, then you're probably not gonna

9:35

be able to be a really

9:37

good, I don't know, runner of

9:39

triathlons or something. There's a million

9:41

examples. We really can't do it all.

9:43

At least not simultaneously. So

9:45

as you're making your to do list with your big

9:47

picture goals in mind, pick something

9:49

to fail at too. To say, well,

9:51

okay. Instead of constantly being

9:53

dismayed when I realize that I'm not

9:56

superhuman, I'm going to make a

9:58

decision about a few things in advance But

10:00

for this season of my life, I'm just not gonna

10:02

be doing. So like, you know

10:04

what? I'm not gonna be

10:06

keeping a tidy, beautiful

10:08

house while dealing with a newborn

10:10

baby and working full time, you know.

10:12

And he says when you choose what to fail

10:14

out ahead of time, You're really

10:16

changing your mindset because months

10:18

from now when you see your messy house,

10:20

maybe you won't actually feel like

10:22

you're failing. Instead, you

10:24

could see it as a reminder of your values

10:26

in this moment and what you've

10:28

committed to. Okay.

10:32

Time for a recap, takeaway

10:35

one, figure out what matters to you.

10:37

What are your priorities at this moment? Do

10:39

you have a big goal or project in

10:41

mind? Takeaway two, pick a

10:43

to do list system. Paper

10:45

or digital, hour by hour, or

10:47

a simple list of tasks. The

10:49

system can change This is just a starting

10:51

point. Takeaway three, fill

10:53

your list with the tasks of daily

10:55

living, but also with steps toward

10:57

your big picture goals. And take

10:59

away four, pick something to fail

11:02

at. You don't have to do everything all at

11:04

once, and you definitely don't have to do it

11:06

all well. Also remember

11:08

that to do lists exist to serve

11:10

us. We don't answer to them. So

11:12

if your to do list is making you feel bad

11:14

about yourself or your life, crumble

11:16

it up, roll it out, and start

11:19

over again when you're ready. I think

11:21

that a lot of us seem to

11:23

go through life feeling like we're in

11:25

sort of productivity debt. You know, we've got to

11:27

work really hard today to try to pay off the

11:30

debt by the end of the day. But

11:32

remember, Oliver says, There's

11:34

nothing you need to do to

11:36

earn your right to exist.

11:41

Before we go, an editorial

11:44

note. We wanna let you know that Angel

11:46

Trinidad, the founder and CEO of passion

11:48

planner, and life kit

11:50

reporter producer Andy Tagle have been

11:52

friends since college. But we asked

11:54

Angel to share their experience with us not

11:56

because of this personal relationship. But because

11:58

four other life kit staffers

12:00

independently discovered passion planner and

12:02

found it to be a really useful

12:04

tool to help them manage their time. For

12:07

more life kit, check out our other

12:09

episodes. We've got one on how to stop procrastinating

12:11

and another on how to improve your

12:13

focus. You can find those at NPR

12:15

dot org slash life kit. And if you

12:17

love life kit and want more, subscribe to

12:19

our newsletter at NPR dot org

12:22

slash life kit newsletter. And now

12:24

a random tip from one of our listeners.

12:26

Hi. My name is Claire

12:28

Merritt, and my life hack

12:30

is when you meet someone new,

12:33

go into your contacts and

12:35

write a little note in that little note

12:37

section. And if there's anything

12:39

that you wanna remember about this

12:41

person, you know, they have dog being

12:43

fed or they're

12:45

married or this is their coffee

12:47

order. Put all of

12:49

that in your contact. And

12:52

make you look really attentive. If

12:54

you've got a good tip, leave us a voice mail

12:56

at 2022169823

12:59

or email us a voice memo at live kit

13:01

at NPR dot org. This

13:04

episode of Live Kit was produced by

13:06

Audrey Winn, who was edited by

13:08

be Douglas. Our visuals editor is Beck Harlan,

13:10

and our digital editor is

13:12

Malika Greeb. Meghan Cain is the

13:14

supervising editor, and Beth Donovan is

13:17

executive producer. Our intern

13:19

is Jamal Michel. Our production

13:21

team also includes Andy Tagle,

13:23

Claire Marie Schneider, and Sylvie Douglas.

13:25

Julia Carney is our podcast coordinator.

13:28

Engineering support comes from Gracie

13:30

Lee, Andy Luther, and

13:32

Josephine, me and I. I'm Mary

13:34

Al Segara, Thanks for listening.