0:00

This episode was recorded

0:02

on Camaraga Land. Hi guys

0:04

and welcome back to another

0:07

episode of Life on Cut.

0:09

I'm Laura. I'm Brittany. How you

0:11

feeling? I'm feeling great. Why? Well

0:13

because you came in quite angry

0:16

about an exhaust pan or something.

0:18

No I'm not angry. Okay I

0:20

have a question for you all

0:22

and I'm going to bring this

0:24

as the hard hitting stuff straight

0:26

off the back. It's straight off

0:28

the bat. It's straight off the

0:31

bat. Not straight off the back.

0:33

Like, is it back? Did I

0:35

say the wrong thing? It's so

0:37

funny because yesterday we were talking

0:39

about saying the butt. You're saying

0:41

that you do wrong, it's straight

0:44

off the bat. Not the back.

0:46

Like who are you taking it

0:48

off someone's back? But why is

0:50

it bat? Straight off the cricka

0:53

bat? Yeah, well, like, if anyone's

0:55

carrying a heavy load, I'm going

0:57

to take it straight off a

0:59

heavy load. hatred towards exhaust fans

1:01

or if this is something that

1:04

other people experience to the same

1:06

level and I never realize this

1:08

until my beautiful mother-in-law Ellie moved

1:10

in with us because she seems

1:12

to be totally immune to them so

1:15

she leaves the exhaust fan over the

1:17

oven on and I get home and

1:19

I feel like I've walked into a

1:21

war like I instantly feel the rising

1:23

anxiety because I'm like oh trying to

1:25

work. And then I had this moment

1:27

where I was like, why do I

1:29

feel so angry? Why do I feel

1:31

so confused? And I walked over and

1:33

I turned the exhaust fan off and

1:36

it was like someone had, it was

1:38

like the sun came out and the clouds

1:40

had lifted and I could think again.

1:42

Am I the only person who has this?

1:44

She's still undiagnosed day to age 18. She's

1:46

off. The reason I'm laughing so much is

1:49

because there is not one single thing

1:51

in my house that causes more conflict

1:53

than the exhaust fan in the exhaust

1:55

fan in the shower. or the kitchen.

1:57

It's the shower more because it's mused

1:59

more frequently. I just I don't understand

2:01

I cannot handle the sound now I

2:04

don't I don't feel safe in my

2:06

own home because of the exhaust fans

2:08

the rage that can come from an

2:10

exhaust fan I'm not joking it feels

2:12

as though there's someone standing on either

2:14

side of my ears going and I'm

2:17

like getting angrier and angrier and angrier

2:19

and you cannot make it stop you

2:21

can't turn off stops but I like

2:23

that you you sympathize with this and

2:25

Brittany doesn't care so deeply Well no,

2:28

I mean do I love the sound

2:30

of like in my ears? No, does

2:32

it bother me? No. Does my exhaust

2:34

fan in my kitchen work? No. I

2:36

can't put it on. It's broken. It

2:38

doesn't work. Prince House is so peaceful.

2:41

It is so peaceful. It is so

2:43

peaceful. It is because everything is broken.

2:45

I can't even like my oven anymore.

2:47

Everything is breaking. Well if you want

2:49

to feel alive, just come over to

2:52

my house because Ellie's got every single

2:54

one on full force. There's a lot

2:56

going on. You walk in, there's a

2:58

lot of noise, a lot of exhaust

3:00

fans, a lot of kids, a lot

3:02

of dogs, there's a cat. It's from

3:05

someone that lives alone, who has a

3:07

broken exhaust fan, but I walk into

3:09

your house. Is a lot going on?

3:11

When you walk into my house, like

3:13

you know you're alive. You get assaulted

3:15

the second you're walking in. Everything is

3:18

going at full throttle. Full throttle. I

3:20

quit. I quit last week. I quit

3:22

last week. It's been a really good

3:24

five and a half years. I've had

3:26

a really fun time on this podcast,

3:29

but I'm done, guys. I can't speak

3:31

anymore. I can't think because I have

3:33

an exhaust fan in my head. Speaking

3:35

of quitting, I would just like to

3:37

say, I would just like to say.

3:39

Please don't make this. Speaking of quitting,

3:42

I would just like to say. Please.

3:44

I would just like to say it

3:46

by surprise. and put it on social

3:48

media. You went for the votes. Everybody

3:50

was pro-snort. Do you know what I

3:53

reckon? The Venn diagram of people who

3:55

hate exhaust fans and also hate snorts

3:57

is probably a complete circle. Now my

3:59

my diems were flooded with support. Luddered.

4:01

I would like to read a message

4:03

that we got to life uncut DMs.

4:06

I actually stopped listening to a certain

4:08

very popular podcast because I couldn't handle

4:10

the snorting in my ears. So thank

4:12

you Kisha for editing. So I don't

4:14

have to abandon this one too. I'm

4:17

eating the listeners. She didn't like it.

4:19

She didn't abandon our podcast. She's still

4:21

listening. So how snort wasn't as bad.

4:23

Leave them out. See what happened. See

4:25

what happened. And the people have spoken.

4:27

35 people. 35 people. Actually

4:30

it's more than that. I'm checking.

4:32

Yeah. He commented twice. All right,

4:34

let's move on. BRIT, you have

4:37

some updates. Okay, last week we

4:39

spoke quite a bit about your

4:41

hen's party. We spoke about the

4:44

potential of having a very famous

4:46

stripper there to give you a

4:48

complementary and maybe me one as

4:51

well, lap dance. But there's been

4:53

some updates on this. I do

4:55

have an update. So Wilma Fay

4:58

is his name. Also we've not.

5:00

He's not a dessert. Stop calling

5:02

it! I mean, he's a dessert

5:05

to many people. Stop calling it

5:07

real perfect. Will Crissol? Anything is

5:09

parfied? No one knows, but it's

5:12

not. People do know. He doesn't

5:14

even know. It does look like

5:16

parfé. P-A-R-F-I-T-T-T-T-P-A-A-A-R-F-I-T-T-T-T-P-A-A-A-A-A-A-F-I-I-I-I-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T Yeah, it's not Puffet.

5:19

Puffet sounds better. Will Puffet does

5:21

sound better, but I don't think

5:23

we can just change his name.

5:26

All right, well look, Will, who

5:28

is clearly a snack, he's like

5:30

from the down under, you know,

5:33

the strippers, what are they called?

5:35

Magic My, Strippers. He's very famous,

5:37

he looks exactly like chatting Tatum.

5:39

We got into a big discussion

5:42

about it on the last podcast

5:44

episode, and we really established that

5:46

if we're going to have a

5:49

stripper at Brits. Channing 2.0 or

5:51

nothing like it was he. I

5:53

believe your words were fake Channing

5:56

Tater. Yeah, it was fake. Well

5:58

Brit, we do have some devastating

6:00

news for you. He's in Argentina

6:03

performing, isn't he? He is. I

6:05

knew it, I know his schedule.

6:07

He's on a world tour at

6:10

the same time that your hands

6:12

is happening, but we do have

6:14

a message from him. Hey Brits.

6:17

Brits, cute. Oh my God, this

6:19

is going to get me in trouble.

6:21

But no, I just wanted to

6:23

say congratulations on your hands night.

6:25

It sounds hot. I wish I

6:27

could be there to give you

6:30

a lap dance but unfortunately I'm

6:32

on my world tour so I'm

6:34

going to be in Scandinavia when

6:36

your hens party is but I

6:39

will save the lap dance for you

6:41

for another time if your husband to

6:43

be allows me to give you that

6:45

lap dance but have an amazing hens

6:48

night and I will hopefully see you

6:50

soon. Such a personal message he caught

6:52

me Brits. Which makes me think he

6:55

doesn't know what your name is. No,

6:57

because only people really close to me

6:59

call me Brits. It's actually something, but

7:01

you guys don't know because you're not

7:03

that close to me. You've never called

7:06

me. I think though that this means

7:08

that we've got to go back to

7:10

the drawing board. I know you said

7:12

you don't want anyone else, but there's

7:15

other people out there. There's not. There

7:17

is going to be someone else who

7:19

may be a good enough substitute, so

7:21

we will buffet. I feel so confused

7:24

about this whole thing because when you

7:26

initially kind of spoke with me about

7:28

it like you know privately I thought

7:30

you didn't want to have one at

7:32

your hands and then on the podcast

7:35

I found that you absolutely did so

7:37

I kind of was like chasing

7:39

my tail being like oh well shit misread

7:41

the room would you like for me to

7:43

ask when he's going to be in the

7:45

next and maybe he can come and visit

7:48

us here at work? No! That was weird.

7:50

Why would I want to? Guys this

7:52

odd for the record. I don't want

7:54

a private lap dance from willpower. I'm

7:56

very confused if you do or don't.

7:58

To be fair you argue. mixed signals.

8:00

No I have never, I have been, never

8:02

has there been any inkling of saying hey

8:05

if it's not available just see if you

8:07

can come into work. Like the fact that

8:09

you guys think that this is mixed signals.

8:11

I just don't know how much you wanted

8:14

it like how much it was like just

8:16

like just like just like please you. She's

8:18

like, I actually gave him your address. And

8:20

I said that the exhaust fan's not working,

8:22

if you could go and fix it like

8:25

a maintenance guy. They're your tool belt, that

8:27

sounds good. That actually would be hard. Maybe

8:29

he needs to go to Laura's house. In

8:31

all seriousness, it's disappointing, I'm disappointed for you

8:33

guys that you don't get your lap dancer

8:36

from Will. I was worried he's very popular,

8:38

I did see his schedule that he wasn't

8:40

a world to us, so I didn't think

8:42

it was going to be able to be

8:44

able to be able to be able to

8:47

be able to happen, so I was going

8:49

to be able to happen, so I did

8:51

brace myself, so I did brace myself for

8:53

the disappointment. to which I do feel. We

8:55

are going to go back to the drawing

8:58

board and we will find a adequate substitute

9:00

because the life has deserved this content. No,

9:02

I'm not being we deserved this. I'm not

9:04

being stripped on by anyone else. All right,

9:06

well speaking of hen's parties, I know you

9:09

also have an update on bucks parties because

9:11

you mentioned that Ben had his on the

9:13

weekend. The last time we talked about it

9:15

was happening but now it has happened. How

9:18

did that all unfold? Yeah far more wholesome.

9:20

It was um... I mean, there are some

9:22

things that Bennett said, like, what's it? What

9:24

happens in fight club stays in fight club?

9:26

There's some things I'm not allowed to speak

9:29

about. It's the first rule of fight club

9:31

is that you don't speak about. Yeah, so

9:33

what happens in fight club? What happens in

9:35

Vegas? What happens in Vegas? What happens in

9:37

Vegas? What happens in Vegas? What happens in

9:40

Vegas? In Vegas? What happens in Vegas? In

9:42

the last hurrah. Like he had met up

9:44

with his friends. He driven to Milan. I

9:46

just said to him, hey, this is the

9:48

last goodbye. I'm giving you a free pass.

9:51

I'm not going to speak to you. I'm

9:53

not going to bother you. I want you

9:55

to go and have fun. The free pass

9:57

to be specific means you don't feel like

9:59

you have to contact me. If you want

10:02

to go to a strip club, you can,

10:04

as long as there's no touching. He knew

10:06

the rules. He sent me a countdown timer

10:08

in the calendar that was counting down for

10:10

like 30 hours or something. He's like, see

10:13

you in 30 hours. Speaking to Sherry at

10:15

the same time, because Jay is on the

10:17

box as well, and I was like, oh

10:19

God, this is going to get crazy, isn't

10:22

it? She was like, probably. Five I get

10:24

a message from Ben. And he's. That looks

10:26

nice and there's a photo of all the

10:28

boys sitting around at this restaurant. This is

10:30

how they kick starting. They're drinking wine, they've

10:33

got rosé. I was like, what is happening?

10:35

It looked like a girl's bottomless branch. Like

10:37

it was like really, they were all on

10:39

the rosé and stuff. Like it was like

10:41

really, they were all on the rosé and

10:44

stuff. They're in Italy, of course they're having

10:46

a rosé and like, of course they're gonna

10:48

start on the wine, like. texting your girlfriend

10:50

goodbye to doing like fireballs within five minutes

10:52

do you? I don't know. You've got to

10:55

warm up into that stuff. Anyway, this continues

10:57

to go on. I continue to get probably

10:59

four separate calls throughout the night from Ben

11:01

and his friends. Like I was like, guys,

11:03

stop contacting me. I was like, go and

11:06

have fun. They were like, hey, just checking

11:08

in. This is what we're doing. And I

11:10

was like, the fact that you guys are

11:12

partying and thinking that you need to contact

11:14

me. I was like cute. Ben I appreciate

11:17

it anyway I mess with Sherry and I

11:19

was like do you think that they're like

11:21

off their chops right now I haven't heard

11:23

from them a while and she's like no

11:26

I think it's pretty safe the last thing

11:28

I heard from Jay was a picture saying

11:30

hey in pastry heaven and they were taking

11:32

photos at a bakery it was just so

11:34

wholesome the only thing was Ben was saying

11:37

that he saw Jay outside this club and

11:39

he was talking to this really hot smoke

11:41

show girl so there's a club apparently in

11:43

Milan that is for a lot of the

11:45

footballers to go to like because there's a

11:48

big football clubs in Italy like AC Milan

11:50

and all. these huge ones. Anyway, it's this

11:52

club where it's like the side access, you

11:54

get scurried in, it's very private, you can

11:56

do whatever you want in there, no one

11:59

knows, there's no photos, whatever. And it's where

12:01

all these really hot smoke show chicks go

12:03

as well because they want to go and

12:05

hook up with people. So Ben said he

12:07

was looking over and he was like, what

12:10

the fuck? And Jay was in the corner

12:12

talking to this Italian girl because she thought

12:14

he was a football. Anyway, Ben's like, this

12:16

can't be right. I'm going to go and

12:18

do the brother-in-law thing and I'm going to

12:21

go and see what the fuck's going on.

12:23

Because they were talking for quite a while.

12:25

And it looked like they might have been

12:27

swapping numbers because their phone was out. So

12:30

Ben was... Which is just not Jay. So

12:32

Ben walks over, because they're all drinking. Ben

12:34

walks over to be like, what the hell's

12:36

going on? Looks down and Jay is just

12:38

like deep in the Maya album, just showing

12:41

this hot smoke show chick, his daughter, he's

12:43

like, his hate martfeld daughter, and the girl's

12:45

like, mhm, he's like, and this is her,

12:47

this was her in the bath last night,

12:49

and this is when she tried for the

12:52

first time. Ben was like, I had this

12:54

moment where I was like, surely. they're not

12:56

swapping numbers because why else would you have

12:58

your phone out and Jay was just showing

13:00

albums and baby photos. Yeah we just had

13:03

this realization Sherry and I were like we

13:05

have nothing to worry about. But also the

13:07

reason why you have nothing to worry about

13:09

is because of having someone who does respect

13:11

you enough to give you like the constant

13:14

contact points. You know what I mean? Like

13:16

it was wonderful. It's the consistency, right? That's

13:18

where it comes from. Because if you were

13:20

with someone who often just didn't reply or

13:22

like kind of went cold and then popped

13:25

back up again, you would feel insecure and

13:27

unsure about what they were doing on their

13:29

bucks party. But because you have someone who's

13:31

consistent in their behavior, you don't feel crazy.

13:34

There's also. Like I laugh and say go

13:36

crazy and enjoy yourself. There might be people

13:38

saying why are you pushing him to go

13:40

and have so like such a loose night.

13:42

And it's because he never does. His whole

13:45

life as an athlete, they don't drink, they

13:47

don't party, they don't do anything because they're

13:49

not allowed. They never get two days off

13:51

in a row. Like footballers don't get two

13:53

days off in a row for that exact

13:56

reason. that their teams know that they could

13:58

go and party, then it's disastrous. So I

14:00

was like, I actually want you to go

14:02

and have fun. But it comes down to

14:04

two, I think, like, I was talking to

14:07

Ben about it, and he's like, baby, maybe

14:09

10 years ago to be different. He's like,

14:11

but we're all in our 30s now, like

14:13

we're a bit older, and not that 30s

14:15

is old. But I think of the way

14:18

that we go out now in our 30s.

14:20

You don't go out the same way. You

14:22

don't want to do the same way. You

14:24

don't want to do the same way. You

14:26

don't want to do the same way. You

14:29

don't want to do the same way. strip

14:31

clubs are something that are synonymous with box

14:33

parties and hence parties as we know and

14:35

he was like no he's like it's such

14:38

a cliche to think that men want to

14:40

go to strip clubs on their box he's

14:42

like most people don't actually want to go

14:44

there it's just something that they've always thought

14:46

that they had to do they just had

14:49

more fun sitting in a booth giggling with

14:51

each other drinking rosé it's also like I

14:53

mean, we have spoken about it a bit,

14:55

but it's also like the lowest form of

14:57

organization. It's like the easiest route of creativity

15:00

of like, well, what are we going to

15:02

do? Okay, I guess we're going to do

15:04

ABC on this box night. I also wonder

15:06

how much it comes to the whole idea

15:08

of like forbidden fruit, as in if you

15:11

are the type of person who was really

15:13

quite controlling of your partner and you're like,

15:15

this is what you're allowed to do, you're

15:17

not allowed to do this. I wonder whether

15:19

for most people there would be an element

15:22

of like no it's my bucks party and

15:24

I get to do whatever I want so

15:26

I do actually want to go and do

15:28

those things and this is the one night

15:30

you're not allowed to have an opinion on

15:33

it and like yeah that's not healthy but

15:35

I actually think it could potentially be true

15:37

I think that in certain circumstances like that.

15:39

And again, it's going to be dependent on

15:42

what the person is like as well and

15:44

how much they respect their partner. But I

15:46

think sometimes giving that little bit of like

15:48

lack on a leash. It's reverse psychology. I

15:50

told him you could do anything he's like,

15:53

oh, exactly. It takes away that buzz of

15:55

being like, I'm being rebellious, you know? Here's

15:57

a scenario for you. What would you do

15:59

in this? This probably could be an ask

16:01

uncut question, but this is something that happened

16:04

to a friend of a friend of a

16:06

friend of mine quite a friend of mine

16:08

quite a friend of mine quite a long

16:10

time. Her husband went on their bucks night,

16:12

great relationship, never any cheating, never any suspicion

16:15

of cheating, I guess prior to that. husband

16:17

or fiancee went on a bucks night came

16:19

home and she found a receipt for a

16:21

brothel in his pocket and she called the

16:23

brothel to find out what services you could

16:26

receive for the amount of money that was

16:28

paid and it was full services what would

16:30

you do yeah yeah yeah and after confronting

16:32

him he admitted yep we went to a

16:35

brothel for like last chance last hurrah kind

16:37

of thing before being married was it his

16:39

bucks party and he was the groom I

16:41

don't think I could marry that person, but

16:43

obviously it's situational. There would be people that

16:46

would be fine. I think I'd at least

16:48

have to point to the wedding. I don't

16:50

think anyone would be fine. No, but there

16:52

are people, there are definitely people, this could

16:54

go two ways, there are definitely people, there

16:57

are definitely people, there are definitely people that

16:59

are like, because box parties and hen's parties

17:01

happen usually quite close to a wedding. So

17:03

like. Let's deal with this later. There'd be

17:05

people that are like, this is way too

17:08

hard basket to pull a pin, and they

17:10

feel the guilt of pulling the pin for

17:12

everyone else involved, and everyone else it would

17:14

affect that would sit in that. And I

17:16

would feel the same. There'd be every part

17:19

of me that would be like, how do

17:21

I pull the pin on this, especially for

17:23

me if it's international wedding when people have...

17:25

Like, imagine all of your guests that have

17:27

booked flight somewhere and you were pulling the

17:30

pin on that for them. So I'd almost

17:32

think, fuck, do I just go through with

17:34

it and try and sort this out later?

17:36

Much like the honey badger should have done

17:39

on my season of The Bachelor. Like, because

17:41

that's the same. Yeah, but he should have

17:43

just committed to it and pulled the pin

17:45

later. But it's really hard. Like, for me,

17:47

that is, there is no excuse. in the

17:50

books to cheat on your box because it's

17:52

your last for art. There is not one

17:54

thing that you could tell me in that

17:56

situation that would make that okay. Yeah, I

17:58

think if I was in that situation, the

18:01

thing that I know that I might be

18:03

a bit unique in this way, if I

18:05

was to compare them hooking up with someone

18:07

that they had just met, let's use the

18:09

example of the smoke show that Jay was

18:12

talking to, or a sex worker, I would

18:14

much prefer the sex worker, There's not an

18:16

emotional tie there. And if I was presented

18:18

with those two options, which I know neither

18:20

of them are desirable, but I would actually

18:23

prefer it to be as I would be

18:25

able to get over a sex work, I'd

18:27

more than I would be able to get

18:29

over like an emotional affair. I think it

18:31

would for me. And I mean, I've thought

18:34

about this a lot over the years. I

18:36

think for me, it would really raise questions

18:38

around. how misogynistic my partner was. This idea

18:40

that they were entitled to one last dip

18:43

in the pond or whatever, however you want

18:45

to describe it prior to, do you know

18:47

what I don't think anyone to have described

18:49

it as a dip in the pond. But

18:51

you know, like one last chance with someone

18:54

else before committing. and like that that wasn't

18:56

almost like a right or an entitlement that

18:58

they had and that they shouldn't feel remorseful

19:00

or regretful like it was a planned thing

19:02

and also the fact that their friends around

19:05

them facilitated it and were collaborating in the

19:07

lie against me I think I would I

19:09

would really struggle to trust all of the

19:11

people that I had brought into my network

19:13

not just my future husband yeah for me

19:16

it's gross and it's not gross because it's

19:18

a sex worker it's just because it's cheating

19:20

because it's cheating a week before you get

19:22

married before you get married I know what

19:24

you're saying, Kish, but I don't think I

19:27

agree with it because almost in a different

19:29

way, if it was a random in the

19:31

club that just happened, that almost seems different

19:33

to me than being so premeditated to be

19:35

like, let's Google where a brothel is. Let's

19:38

get the Uber to the brothel. Let's engage

19:40

in it. And it's not something where it's

19:42

like, oh my God, it was a mistake.

19:44

It was an accident. It just happened. It's

19:47

almost like, I don't know if it's worse.

19:49

I don't know if it's worse. just planned

19:51

and premeditated. I think every version of it

19:53

is terrible, a completely terrible, and I really

19:55

do question, like, proximity to wedding would definitely

19:58

have an impact, like you said, Brit, on

20:00

how you would navigate that, because I think

20:02

most people would want space to really process,

20:04

how do you feel about something that's just

20:06

happened? But when you have a looming deadline

20:09

of a wedding that's happening, you don't really

20:11

have that space and time to process, you've

20:13

got to make a decision. It is, and

20:15

I could cry, but it is so amazing

20:17

to be with someone finally in my life

20:20

that I completely trust. And like, I mean,

20:22

we're so far away. We see each other

20:24

every couple of months. It is the perfect

20:26

recipe for infidelity on both of our sides

20:28

if we wanted to. And not once since

20:31

the day I met him, and since he

20:33

met me as well, have either has ever

20:35

had an issue or questioned or even thought

20:37

about it. There is not one percent of

20:39

me that has to worry about one thing

20:42

in my life we've been at all, and

20:44

it is such an amazing feeling to have

20:46

like that partner in my life. So as

20:48

much as we joke about it, it's like,

20:51

fuck. It took me so long to find,

20:53

and I do want to just like put

20:55

that hope out there to people because I

20:57

get this message all the time. I'm 37,

20:59

like it's taken me a long time to

21:02

meet my person and there's always people messaging

21:04

me saying like I'm in my 30s, I've

21:06

just turned 30 and I'm never going to

21:08

meet someone. I do just want to say

21:10

make sure you don't settle for something at

21:13

any point of your life because age is

21:15

just a number and it doesn't matter when

21:17

you meet your person because this feeling for

21:19

me I would have waited another 10 years

21:21

to have. It's a really different thing when

21:24

you go from being in relationships. the expectation

21:26

is that cheating is not normal and accepted,

21:28

but that it happens and it's something that

21:30

you should just almost get over if it

21:32

does happen. Or that you have to worry

21:35

about, like it's normal to want to check

21:37

their phone. Yeah, and I completely can empathize

21:39

with that feeling written. Like it makes me

21:41

so happy that you are in that place

21:43

because I think anyone who looks from an

21:46

outset, or not anyone, that's not fair assessment,

21:48

but a lot of people would be like

21:50

professional sports person, lives in another country, like

21:52

how do you have trust. is a real

21:55

reflection on the relationships that they have had

21:57

because that would have been my impression prior

21:59

to being with someone like Matt. I used

22:01

to think that cheating was an inevitable part

22:03

of every relationship that whether you thought it

22:06

or didn't think it or you knew about

22:08

it or you didn't know about it, it

22:10

would happen and you know it's just how

22:12

you navigate it when it does happen. I

22:14

thought it was a given... Yeah, and also

22:17

talk about not judging a book by its

22:19

cover. Fuck I got that wrong. I only

22:21

hooked up with Ben because I thought he

22:23

was going to be a player and like

22:25

a wenca and like, you know, like get

22:28

down dirty. And it's so far from the

22:30

truth, the guy's at home every night watching

22:32

cooking videos. He's the most... Mega Markle. He's

22:34

probably probably has watched it. So anyway, that's

22:36

my update. That's my wholesome update. As I'm

22:39

sure all of you are aware by now,

22:41

Megan Markle, she has just brought out her

22:43

new Netflix docco, which is called With Love,

22:45

Megan. If you haven't seen it yet, you

22:47

probably will. Because it's doing very well on

22:50

Netflix. It's like number seven at the moment.

22:52

Like it's very well watched. And very well

22:54

watched terribly received, which is never the criticism

22:56

that you want to receive for your own

22:59

show. But it is kind of a hybrid,

23:01

I guess, between being slightly Tradwife, a home

23:03

cooking show, and like how to entertain friends

23:05

and guests. I would kind of almost liken

23:07

it to who's a really famous Martha Stewart.

23:10

except with less sass, like a very perfectly

23:12

presented Martha Stewart. There's eight episodes. They've actually

23:14

renewed it for a second season now after

23:16

the first few episodes coming out and the

23:18

response within the first week. However, it's only

23:21

received. 28% score on rotten tomatoes. It has

23:23

received some truly horrific headlines. I want to

23:25

read out a couple of them too. Headlines

23:27

like, Exercise in Narcissism reviews savage Mega Michael's

23:29

Netflix reality TV, Rolling Stones. Mega Michael is

23:32

just a girl standing in front of her

23:34

fans asking them to love her. With love,

23:36

Megan Review, Smug, Syrupey and Endlessly spoofable. The

23:38

question that we had and I mean we've

23:40

all watched episodes from it now and we

23:43

have similar but also slightly different views on

23:45

this is why is it that we hate

23:47

watch or why is it that we hate

23:49

follow content that we know that it's not

23:51

necessarily enjoyable or we know that we're not

23:54

getting something out of it but we still

23:56

can't turn it off or can't turn away.

23:58

We want to be part of the conversation.

24:00

whether that conversation is negative or positive, that

24:03

hate following and hate watching is something that

24:05

we have all been guilty of at different

24:07

times. Yeah, and we're going to unpack the

24:09

hate following, but before we do that, I

24:11

do want to unpack the show a little

24:14

bit. I... Hate how much hate Megan Michael gets

24:16

like I've always felt really sorry for her

24:18

That doesn't mean I agree with everything or I

24:20

like her But I just don't think she

24:22

deserves the pile on that she has received over

24:24

the last I think what is it seven?

24:26

No ten years I'm not sure how long she's

24:28

been with Prince Harry now But she has

24:30

been the most hated trolled and bullied person in

24:33

the world at one stage and I do

24:35

feel like she's gotten herself into a position now

24:37

where she can't really do anything without getting

24:39

criticism I want to read an excerpt from

24:41

an article that I read from something

24:43

called the Gulf News. When I read

24:45

it, I was like, this is exactly

24:48

how I felt going into this. The

24:50

article opens with, when I began watching

24:52

the Megan Markle lead lifestyle show, I

24:54

took a solemn oath to fly in

24:56

with an open mind and leave any

24:58

prejudices that I may harbour against her

25:00

by the door of her Montesito mansion.

25:03

One, she doesn't live in. Does she

25:05

not live in? Does she not live

25:07

in that mansion? No, that's the first

25:09

thing she said in the show. She

25:11

lives in Montesito, but she doesn't live

25:13

in that specific. So where are the

25:16

bees? Are they not the garden? Yeah.

25:18

See, like the garden is actually hers.

25:20

Oh, but not the big cooking bench

25:22

top. Not the kitchen. Yeah. And some

25:24

people kicked off about that, but apparently

25:26

there's not a single celebrity chef or

25:29

anything in the world that films in

25:31

their actual own kitchen. Of course, it's

25:33

not her house, that doesn't bother me

25:35

at all. That films in their actual

25:37

own kitchen. Of course, it's not her

25:39

house, that doesn't bother me at all.

25:41

Of course, it's not her house, that

25:43

doesn't bother me. That doesn't have any

25:46

problem with that. In the first few

25:48

shots where she's enjoying bee farming, reminding

25:50

me of a recent documentary chronicling David

25:52

Beckham's life, what's with wealthy people and

25:54

raising bees in their backyard with the

25:56

help of a professional? That's a fair

25:58

point. What is with that? I don't know.

26:00

She goes on to say, listen, you can catch flies

26:02

or fans with honey, but what exactly is the goal here?

26:04

Every scene in the first episode felt contrived and orchestrated

26:06

to showcase how lovely, amiable, and down-to-earth Megan is. Now, I

26:09

really, really, really, wanted to go in and love this.

26:11

I went in with completely like open heart, open arms,

26:13

open ideas, open mind, just say, let's what she can do.

26:15

Like, I love that she's out there hustling, hustling, trying

26:17

to work. But what did I just watch? I felt like

26:19

I was watching Play School. I felt like, and I

26:21

don't want to say that in a mean way, but I

26:23

know it comes across mean, but the way she was speaking

26:25

to her guests and almost like explaining down to them

26:27

how to do some of the most basic things, I didn't

26:30

understand that concept. Like in the second episode with Mindy,

26:32

she was explaining how to cut little sandwiches for a kid's

26:34

party. Mindy's a mom. She's a grown woman. it was

26:36

like hey this is how we're making ham and cheese

26:38

sandwiches pick your favorite shape and we're gonna cut the sandwich

26:40

and then like Mindy cuts the sandwich into a love

26:42

heart and she's like oh well done like I just felt

26:44

like the content wasn't suitable for the people that were

26:46

involved and for the audience and I don't know who the

26:48

content was for kids I don't know if the content is

26:51

for moms at home that would like to be better

26:53

homemakers. I'm a bit confused at where the messaging was supposed

26:55

to land. Yeah, I feel similar to you in that

26:57

I definitely went into it with an open mind and open

26:59

heart because I want to love Megan. I really do.

27:01

I don't have any prejudice against her. I think that

27:03

the backlash she's received is so deeply unjust and there's many

27:05

layers of it, which has been well documented over the

27:07

last few years. The thing I was surprised about and I

27:09

agree with you is that it is unfortunate how perfect

27:12

she has to present. And I do think that a reality

27:14

TV platform probably isn't necessarily the right platform because we expect

27:16

out of reality TV, we expect realness and we expect

27:18

authenticity. When we're being presented with

27:20

perfection, it seems to be

27:22

lacking of those two things.

27:24

And even when you look

27:26

at people like the Kardashians,

27:28

for example, in some aspects of

27:31

their life, they're perfect. But

27:33

in other aspects of their

27:35

life, they're very unfiltered and

27:37

very real. And that's the reality

27:39

TV that we kind of

27:41

expect, because we see it

27:43

as being, you know, quote unquote,

27:45

authentic. The issue with this

27:47

show is that the level

27:50

of perfection that is the

27:52

constant thread throughout is so

27:54

unachievable. It is so unrelatable. But

27:56

I unfortunately think that that's

27:58

the only type of content

28:00

that Megan can create. Because

28:02

if she was anything but perfect,

28:04

then from a royal perspective,

28:06

she would be dragged as

28:08

well. So she's kind of damned

28:11

if she does and damned

28:13

if she doesn't. I don't

28:15

hate her for that. I

28:17

found it sugary and I

28:19

found it enjoyable in some ways

28:21

because it was so easy

28:23

to consume. I couldn't turn

28:25

it off. I watched two

28:27

episodes of it. And I also

28:30

think like it would be

28:32

very easy background fodder. The

28:34

only thing I felt disappointed about

28:36

is that I felt disappointed

28:38

that she didn't have a

28:40

bit more grit. Like I

28:42

wanted her to have more

28:44

personality that went beyond the perfection.

28:46

I wanted to like I

28:48

wanted to like her for

28:51

her imperfections, but there weren't

28:53

any. And so that makes her

28:55

to me slightly unlikable because

28:57

it seems unreal. The other

28:59

part of that, I guess, also

29:01

is maybe and it was

29:03

actually really I was talking

29:05

about this, I think he

29:07

made a really interesting point.

29:09

When you're an actress and your

29:12

entire career is being around

29:14

playing personas, but then you

29:16

step into playing the persona

29:18

and maybe she is perfect. Who

29:20

knows? But I kind of

29:22

think no one is. When

29:24

you step into the persona of

29:26

playing perfect, you look at

29:28

it and even though it's

29:31

a reality TV show, you

29:33

think, oh, she's still playing

29:35

a character. And so I think

29:37

that that's where this level

29:39

of detachment comes from with

29:41

it. I understand what Matt

29:43

said, but I think it's a

29:45

bit deeper than that. I

29:48

don't think it's because she's

29:50

an actress at all. I think

29:52

it's because every step she

29:54

has taken for the last

29:56

10 years has been so

29:58

heavily criticised and bullied that

30:00

she is so. careful with what she does now

30:02

and who she is and what she can say. She

30:04

self-cences herself to the extreme and I can only

30:06

imagine that that is the byproduct any

30:08

of us would experience when we've been

30:11

trolled for literally everything we have done,

30:13

said, looked, dressed, every single thing of

30:15

her being has been so heavily criticized

30:17

that I imagine this is the byproduct.

30:19

So I don't know if it's necessarily...

30:21

Most actors are so good at acting

30:23

that they can peel away and be

30:25

normal. They can be anyone. I don't

30:28

think she's acting. I think she's genuinely

30:30

made a conscious decision to say, I've

30:32

signed a contract for our family to

30:34

produce, you know, five separate shows, allegedly,

30:36

for a hundred million dollars. What can

30:38

I put out so that I can

30:40

meet my requirements with them and my

30:43

contract, but also he's going to safeguard

30:45

me from literally being trolled for the

30:47

rest of the world. quote, unquote, safest

30:49

option for herself and for her

30:51

family. And look, this number seven

30:53

in America in the USA. So whether

30:55

people are loving it or hating it,

30:57

she's delivered for Netflix. She has done

30:59

what she has said she was going to

31:02

do. She did it in a way

31:04

where if people are only hating her because

31:06

she's not stepping a foot out of

31:08

line and she's not boring, for her, she's

31:10

probably like, wow, tick, like if that's,

31:12

if the hate is that I'm getting these

31:15

people saying that I'm. Boring she's probably

31:17

okay with that. I would say that collectively

31:19

we have a pretty switched on listenership

31:21

who aren't watching things with the intention to

31:23

then go and troll people online right

31:25

like that's not I don't like this

31:27

is this conversation isn't around like accusing

31:30

anyone but it certainly is a byproduct

31:32

of this show you know Megan has

31:34

switched off or commentary there's all commentary

31:36

around the show has now been switched

31:38

off online because of the absolute torrent

31:41

of hate that was received and the

31:43

I think a lot of us do,

31:45

maybe we do it not even realizing

31:47

that it is something that we kind

31:50

of are self-sabotaging ourselves in a way.

31:52

But it's this idea of hate following

31:54

or hate watching. And so many people

31:56

have hate watched this show in order

31:58

to join the dial. around the negative

32:00

commentary off the back of it. And it

32:03

does make me question, okay, well, how's season

32:05

two going to go of this? Because are

32:07

people going to be as dialed into the

32:10

hate watching for season two when it's just

32:12

going to be more of the same thing?

32:14

Or is it just because it's new? It's

32:16

because it's Megan and it's because she's an

32:19

easy target to kind of, you know, throw

32:21

fury and hate towards? or makes us follow

32:23

someone on social media who we have disdain

32:26

for, but we can't turn away from actually

32:28

viewing the content. Yeah, hate following is a

32:30

really interesting thing because we do it on

32:32

every single level. We do it to famous

32:35

people, we do it to people in our

32:37

lives, we do it to micro influences that

32:39

we follow on social media. I think it

32:41

comes down to like a confirmation bias of

32:44

when somebody doesn't like something or someone. They

32:46

seek out further reasons to justify why they

32:48

don't like them. And so often, someone will

32:51

do something really great or amazing or make

32:53

a really valid point or whatever. And it's

32:55

very easy for you if you already have

32:57

your expectations of that person and your feelings,

33:00

you don't like them. It's very easy to

33:02

ignore the positive things of someone and just

33:04

keep on searching for something that you don't

33:07

like to say, yes, that's why I don't

33:09

like them. That's why I hate them. And

33:11

I think a lot of people do that

33:13

in the day to day, but I think

33:16

a lot of people have done that with

33:18

Megan Michael, the confirmation bias. I've hated her

33:20

for years. Let me just see if I

33:22

can hate her some more or why. And

33:25

they watch the show to try and say,

33:27

yep, I knew it. I knew I hated

33:29

her for a reason. I think there's also

33:32

a comparison aspect to this. I definitely am

33:34

not someone who hate follows. I don't follow

33:36

people. actually and actively that I don't like.

33:38

That doesn't mean I don't check in on

33:41

people's content. And I guess the reason why

33:43

I do that, it's a rare thing for

33:45

me to care enough about someone's content or

33:48

someone's profile that I dislike or I have

33:50

a feeling of like jealousy or hatred for.

33:52

Like that's not something that I think at

33:54

this stage in my life I care about

33:57

or give a lot of energy to. But

33:59

when I think about maybe in my 20s

34:01

when I was more insecure when I was

34:03

deaf. comparing myself more to people. I think

34:06

I did do this type of comparison and

34:08

I think the hate following came from this

34:10

feeling of like I couldn't understand why they

34:13

had maybe the things that I wanted to

34:15

have when I didn't agree with the way

34:17

they went about it all their belief systems

34:19

or you know if I saw something that

34:22

I thought was reinforcing like you say this

34:24

confirmation bias reinforcing the ways or the reasons

34:26

why I didn't like them it made me

34:29

feel a little bit better so it is

34:31

this self-ful feeling cycle where you're like oh

34:33

I hate them yes they might be successful

34:35

but then yes they might be successful but

34:38

then you look at their content again and

34:40

you go oh okay that's the reason why

34:42

I hate them and I wish other people

34:44

could see the thing that I see about

34:47

them and it makes you kind of feel

34:49

a little bit superior in that moment. many

34:51

of you when you think about it do

34:54

check in on the content of people that

34:56

you don't like and you know quote-unquote hate

34:58

follow is it mostly celebrities is it mostly

35:00

influences is it people in your normal life

35:03

is it like you said Brit micro influences

35:05

I would say personally it was never people

35:07

in my direct or own life it was

35:10

always people who had a life that I

35:12

inspired to or had something that I wanted

35:14

that I didn't have I think an interesting

35:16

element that a lot of us would, if

35:19

we were being really honest, have to put

35:21

our hands up myself, included saying that we've

35:23

experienced is the schadenfreude. That's that German word

35:25

that means taking pleasure in someone else's misfortune.

35:28

And it's kind of like, it's kind of

35:30

getting joy from watching the train wreck, right?

35:32

I think in my own life, the only

35:35

time I've really experienced this is when someone

35:37

who I don't think is worthy of the

35:39

success that they have. or potentially who is

35:41

completely unaware of their privilege when they have

35:44

a bit of a downfall. There's a bit

35:46

of me that's like, yeah, you should have

35:48

seen that coming. See, I find that interesting

35:51

because I think I hate the word because

35:53

I can't say it, shadowy for it, is

35:55

that it? think so. So I feel like

35:57

that kind of links more into cancel culture

36:00

and I don't only think this because my

36:02

experience of hate following has never been when

36:04

it is being linked to the demise of

36:06

someone. And I think when I've looked at

36:09

people's content that I've felt that sort of

36:11

like, I don't like them, but I'm going

36:13

to check in anyway. It's always been people

36:16

who are still very successful and they're on

36:18

the upward trajectory of their success. And I

36:20

can't rationalize or I feel like the undeserving

36:22

of that success. When I think people have

36:25

come, you know, in the instances where watching

36:27

someone have a downfall, I feel as though

36:29

I'm less inclined to check in on that,

36:32

not because of the train wreck situation, but

36:34

because the jealousy elements no longer there. Yeah,

36:36

but I think specifically, you know, I've worked

36:38

in media for nearly a decade now. There

36:41

are certain people that I have met along

36:43

the way or I have heard of experiences

36:45

of friends and colleagues that have worked amongst

36:47

certain people. It's taken some time. There was

36:50

a very public situation two weeks ago where

36:52

an Australian radio personality was kind of had

36:54

this fall from grace and there is a

36:57

part of me that took pleasure in that

36:59

because I was like you weren't worthy of

37:01

that position and I did get a bit

37:03

of joy after kind of feeling as though

37:06

everyone else finally got to see what we

37:08

had seen you know so I think that

37:10

that like justification yeah almost like an element

37:13

of oh there's validation now for the fact

37:15

that I never liked this person and now

37:17

I'm seeing them being taken down I don't

37:19

feel that way about Megan I don't really

37:22

I feel very indifferent about her if I'm

37:24

completely honest but I think that there would

37:26

be people especially if you are like a

37:29

bit of a royalist that would experience shout

37:31

and fro by seeing the way that this

37:33

Netflix series has kind of been so heavily

37:35

criticized. People just want to be able to

37:38

be involved in the cultural chat, like the

37:40

water cooler chat. So we'll use maths as

37:42

an example. I've said a hundred times I

37:44

can't stand it. I cannot stand watching maths.

37:47

I've never really watched it until like a

37:49

couple of episodes this season. It's a train

37:51

wreck. People watch it because it's starting conversation,

37:54

but then people want to be able to

37:56

be in those conversations. So there are so

37:58

many people I know. that hate watching maths,

38:00

that will continue to watch it. They don't

38:03

believe in anything about it, but they'll watch

38:05

it so that they can contribute to the

38:07

water cooler chat. They can talk about it.

38:10

They can talk about it. They can talk

38:12

about it in the group chats, and I

38:14

think that's what happens with a lot of

38:16

people on social media or people that we

38:19

look up to that we think are famous.

38:21

Megan Markle. We want to be able to

38:23

have these conversations with people so people continue

38:25

to hate follow. Yeah, and I feel like

38:28

with anything there is a scale, right? Like

38:30

it's a spectrum. You could be weirdly obsessed

38:32

with someone. You could be a troll. I

38:35

don't think any of the listeners are, but

38:37

like, you know, you could be someone who

38:39

is like, weirdly obsessed. watches all of the

38:41

content that someone creates, but feels very deeply

38:44

negative about it. And I say this because

38:46

I have experienced this, even recently, I have

38:48

had this woman who just like writes fucking

38:51

awful comments on every single platform and then

38:53

she's been blocked on everything, but I forgot

38:55

to block her on Tony May, because I

38:57

just, why would she have any reason to

39:00

go after that account? And then one day

39:02

she just popped up started writing awful things

39:04

on Tony May, and I was like, why

39:06

do I take it? like me I don't

39:09

know what I've done but something I've done

39:11

or I've said or my just existence upsets

39:13

you for whatever reason and I think it's

39:16

like you know in that sort of situation

39:18

I'm like oh that's that's a really sad

39:20

for her you know it's sad for her

39:22

that it makes her so mad to know

39:25

that I exist in the world and I'm

39:27

happy but on the flip side of this

39:29

sometimes we do it for multiple reasons right

39:32

we might do it for like we talked

39:34

about comparison this sense of watching mass this

39:36

sense of like superiority in our own cells

39:38

like well like fuck my relationships not that

39:41

level of a train wreck and it's quite

39:43

interesting to watch other people like fumble around

39:45

in life and you know it's it is

39:47

in some ways entertaining hence why mass is

39:50

the biggest rating show on free-to-air TV and

39:52

I would dare say it 90% of us

39:54

would be guilty of sending like a slightly

39:57

bitchy post right in a group text or

39:59

something you know maybe you've seen a piece

40:01

of content that you thought was utterly cringe-worthy,

40:03

utterly cringe-worthy, and you've copied the URL and

40:06

you've sent it in a group text, because

40:08

having a common hatred about something is quite

40:10

connecting. Having something to bitch about or to

40:13

gossip about, I mean it's not a great

40:15

thing to connect over, but it's definitely something

40:17

that creates this sense of like, oh well

40:19

we feel the same, we have this unity

40:22

because we dislike this thing. I think we

40:24

would be so hard-pressed to find a group

40:26

of friends that has never ever ever shared

40:28

one negative. thing about another person and collectively

40:31

they've all agreed or collectively they've had a

40:33

discussion about what that is or how they

40:35

all feel about that influence or all that

40:38

celebrity. Yeah not us though. No but we

40:40

all do it to different extent. No I

40:42

want to share content about us is what

40:44

I'm saying. You know what happened

40:47

to Matt? Oh, I would hate to see

40:49

those group chats. So that would be really

40:51

triggering. It happened to Matt recently, and this

40:53

was like his friends. So one of his

40:56

friends, she copied like one of Matt's pose.

40:58

And obviously Matt makes loads of different types

41:00

of content. Some of it's super funny. Sometimes

41:02

things don't land, right? Like sometimes things might

41:05

be a bit more cringe than other things.

41:07

Yeah, sure, whatever. But it's social media. You

41:09

just pump out. You just pump out content.

41:11

One group of people or someone else and

41:14

not not someone else like that's the way

41:16

content were totally and this quote-unquote friend had

41:18

Meant to send the link or the URL

41:20

to someone else who they were friends with

41:23

that they sent it to Matt with the

41:25

message of like Can you believe he's making

41:27

this content how embarrassing for him? And I

41:29

was like you're meant to be his friend

41:32

and your hate following the type of he

41:34

just wrote guess this wasn't for me. Hey

41:36

hope you well They haven't spoken in years

41:38

now. That happened, it happened two years ago.

41:41

Oh, that's a great response from him. It

41:43

definitely hits different when it comes from within

41:45

your own friendship group, but it can be

41:47

people who you have close contact with or

41:49

it can be people you who you have

41:52

this like parisocial relationship with because of, you

41:54

know, being celebrities and social media. Well, the

41:56

interesting thing off the back of that law

41:58

is that we... often think that hate following

42:01

somebody does one thing to them when it

42:03

does another. And what I mean by that

42:05

is like, if you don't like someone, you're

42:07

contributing to the conversation and you are going

42:10

against them, all you're doing is contributing to

42:12

an outrage culture, you're contributing to engagement, which

42:14

grows a platform. So we've spoken about it

42:16

before, but like, even though this girl. Copied

42:19

his URL and forwarded on to himself. He's

42:21

still got engagement. It's still forwarded his post

42:23

like it's still grew his post someone else

42:25

has Thank you for watching. Please like share

42:28

and swap up but it but it's true

42:30

any and it comes back to this like

42:32

the age old quote about PR like any

42:34

publicity is good publicity doesn't matter if it's

42:37

bad or not And it is true in

42:39

social media right now, if you are contributing

42:41

to someone's page, even though you don't like

42:43

them, if you're following them and you're commenting

42:46

against what they say or you're arguing with

42:48

them or whatever it is, it's growing their

42:50

platform. That is how today's day and age

42:52

operates. We grow off outrage culture, we grow

42:55

off engagement, shares, likes, comments. It's the way

42:57

social media works. I've said this before. When

42:59

I found this out, I found it such

43:01

an interesting fact around the way that social

43:04

media. and they have done a lot of

43:06

research in what keeps you on their platform

43:08

for the longest and they know that if

43:10

you are angry about something if the feeling

43:13

or the emotion that's been incited in you

43:15

is anger you will spend up to two

43:17

times longer on the platform than you would

43:19

if the feeling that's been incited in you

43:22

is happiness or joy or peaceful looking at

43:24

puppies or baby goats or whatever. You will

43:26

spend two times longer. Outreach culture is a

43:28

vehicle and a mechanism that works for engagement

43:30

and they will always meta will always prioritize

43:33

outrage culture over things that make people feel

43:35

good because it gets the deepest level of

43:37

engagement. And I think really smart, quite controversial.

43:39

influences and political leaders who have social media

43:42

presences, even some news publications, have created their

43:44

social media in a way that demands you

43:46

to follow it in order to engage with

43:48

it. So there's a setting on social media

43:51

where unless you're a follower, you don't have

43:53

the privilege to comment on that page. And

43:55

I think in those instances, it really then

43:57

divides your audience because a lot of people

44:00

are following because yes they want to comment

44:02

positively but other people are following because they

44:04

want to be part of the conversation but

44:06

they want to be able to comment their

44:09

negative thoughts as part of the conversation but

44:11

at the end of the day you're right

44:13

Brit all that's doing is growing a platform

44:15

and growing the engagement of that person so

44:18

if you truly hate someone if you deeply

44:20

fucking hate someone stop engaging with their content

44:22

engage in discussions but don't engage with them

44:24

directly because you're actually just helping them grow.

44:27

as externally as externally and I would be

44:29

very interested by, obviously the majority of our

44:31

audience are women. Do you hate follow any

44:33

men? Because I'm trying to think myself. the

44:36

only time I've ever engaged in the whole

44:38

screenshot send it to the group chat and

44:40

have a bit of a bitch about it.

44:42

I don't think there's one time that it's

44:45

been a guy like it's always been a

44:47

woman and the content that we have spoken

44:49

about and there is an element of social

44:51

network and do we agree with this or

44:54

don't we agree with this and we want

44:56

to discuss it a little bit deeper and

44:58

that I actually think is quite a good

45:00

thing to have healthy discussion around but the

45:02

thing that I thought was particularly interesting about

45:05

this Megan and hate watching it. is that

45:07

Harry had his polo docco come out last

45:09

December. It was a part of that $100

45:11

million Netflix deal. He had to create something

45:14

as well. It was criticised, but I could

45:16

not tell you one headline that I read

45:18

about it. It also has a terrible rating.

45:20

I think it's got a 30% rating on

45:23

Rotten Tomato. So people were basically like, this

45:25

is a terrible docu series. But we were

45:27

not getting even 1% of the headlines as

45:29

what we've got about Megan. I think it's

45:32

quite gendered. I think this hate watching, hate

45:34

following is gendered. We all have deep internalised

45:36

misogyny. You've got to be pretty elevated to

45:38

get to a point where you're like, I

45:41

don't have that and I am completely free

45:43

of the structures of which I've been raised

45:45

in. But as women there is a... there

45:47

is a big competition element between us and

45:50

there's a big comparison element and unfortunately with

45:52

social media that has only grown. I don't

45:54

think that that has been something that we

45:56

have overcome. Yeah I gotta go hate follow

45:59

and bitch about some more men. Yeah let's

46:01

talk about hate following a score. Guys I

46:03

have a bit of my own accidentally unfiltered

46:05

this week and it happened last Friday? Brittany,

46:08

I was Brit's plus one to the Murray

46:10

Claire International Women's Day lunch, right? And very

46:12

classy, very lovely, amazing speakers, like a beautiful

46:14

lunch. I don't think Brit will be taking

46:17

me back as a plus one after I

46:19

tell you this situation. So for each of

46:21

the lunch settings, kind of similar to a

46:23

wedding, you know when you sit down, there's

46:26

a bit of a gift box for you

46:28

on each dinner plate? like a gift bag,

46:30

a party bag. Well it was a box.

46:32

Usually mine are filled with milky ways and

46:35

Mars bars. Well it was because Mari Claire

46:37

in conjunction with Pandora put on this lunch

46:39

for the speakers so that's what this lunch

46:41

was. So we're kind of into the first

46:43

speech and I'm looking over at Brit and

46:46

I'm like can I open my present like

46:48

I was anticipating what it would be right?

46:50

Had anyone else open their present at this

46:52

point? One girl across from me it was

46:55

just Rose Rose's daughter. Okay right, she was

46:57

excited. She's also, I think she's 14. I

46:59

was like if she can get away with

47:01

it, maybe I can too. So I had

47:04

opened the box and there were quite a

47:06

few different layers to it. So there was

47:08

like the fold up top cardboard piece and

47:10

then there was some tissue paper and then

47:13

there was another cardboard box and that slid

47:15

out and then in that with some more

47:17

tissue paper and then in that with some

47:19

more tissue paper and the... probably half an

47:22

hour goes by and I've looked at my

47:24

gift and I was oh yeah exciting and

47:26

exciting and someone's speaking on stage and lunch

47:28

gets put in front of us and I

47:31

had some chewing gum in my mouth so

47:33

I was like oh gosh where can I

47:35

put this chewing gum and I was like

47:37

do I just swallow it that's a big

47:40

gross the napkins that we were given were

47:42

those beautiful material ones so I was like

47:44

well can't put it in there and then

47:46

I remembered there's some tissue paper I just

47:49

need all that tissue paper I can just

47:51

sneak some of my gum into the tissue

47:53

paper that's in the box so that's what

47:55

I did so you put your gum in

47:58

the box next to the piece of jury

48:00

there's like a piece of jewelry and then

48:02

she wrapped the gum up in the tissue

48:04

paper on top of the jury and left

48:07

it in the box in my box it's

48:09

okay she just had no to put it

48:11

was coming home with me okay So the

48:13

rest of the... I hate chewing gum, so

48:15

to me that's a weird shout. Well you

48:18

would have really hated this one. Put that

48:20

in the bin. Because there wasn't a bin

48:22

and I didn't want to get up and

48:24

interrupt the speaker just because I had chewing

48:27

gum, right? I was next to I watched

48:29

it. It was fine. It was like a

48:31

bit of tissue paper in her box. It

48:33

was okay. Yeah, I was trying to be

48:36

subtle. So the lunch wraps up a couple

48:38

hours later and we are off getting some

48:40

photos with some photos with some photos. And

48:42

that was when I realized that I went

48:45

back and where I thought I had put

48:47

my box down, there were like five or

48:49

six other people's boxes there because they were

48:51

also doing the same thing of going and

48:54

getting photos. And I was like, oh my

48:56

God, what do I do? Like do I

48:58

just abandon the gift? But then if I

49:00

abandon the gift, someone else is going to

49:03

take it home thinking that it's their gift

49:05

and then they're going to be like, what

49:07

animal put? chewing gum in my gift like

49:09

in my present I didn't know if everyone

49:12

else had opened there so I didn't know

49:14

if they would know that it wasn't theirs

49:16

and wondered where the chewing gum would come

49:18

from you open every box I tried to

49:21

and I was trying to do it really

49:23

subtly but then I realized that I looked

49:25

like I was trying to compare the presence

49:27

and take them this you just say I'm

49:30

so sorry I put my chewing gum in

49:32

my box around trying to be like who

49:34

got it because they were all different. No,

49:36

you just you just tell anyone who sees

49:39

I'm I'm looking for my chewing gum. Well

49:41

that is what happened because there were two

49:43

women and they were kind of looking at

49:45

me a bit like what are you doing

49:47

and I'm like I'm so sorry I put

49:50

my chewing gum in one of these boxes

49:52

and I don't know which one and now

49:54

I do not know what to do about

49:56

it and they lost it laughing turns out

49:59

that they worked for Murray Claire and thank

50:01

you for being so kind because you made

50:03

me feel like I wasn't an animal that

50:05

I actually was. I couldn't retrieve. I went

50:08

through three of them. We never found it.

50:10

find the someone at home and opened the

50:12

box that they think is from Pandora and

50:14

Mari Claire and found chewing gum in there.

50:17

By chewing gum, I am disgusting. I was

50:19

like, I scurried over to Brit and I

50:21

was like, we need to leave immediately. She

50:23

told me and I was like, you need

50:26

to leave immediately. She told me and I

50:28

was like, you know, I mean, I've spoken

50:30

about it deeply. I have like an

50:32

actual phobia against chewing gum. Yeah, and

50:34

it makes... I like fresh breath, sorry.

50:36

No, it's not that. The smell of

50:38

it to me makes me feel sick.

50:40

The smell of chewing gum on someone's

50:42

breath is not fresh breath to me.

50:44

It's just like weirdly warm minty smell

50:46

that takes over my car. Imagine... The

50:48

thought of it makes me... Imagine if

50:50

you had a gotten home and thought

50:52

you had a nice little gift. It's

50:54

making me want to cry. Imagine you

50:57

pull out the jewelry box and you

50:59

like what's it going to be in there

51:01

and you open the tissue paper and there's chewing gum.

51:03

Every so often I get into my car and Matt

51:05

will have had a coffee and he would have stuck

51:07

his chewing gum on top of the coffee lid and

51:09

it is... I have to

51:11

remind myself how much I love that

51:14

man, because in those moments I'm like,

51:16

I could be single. It could be

51:18

worse if that's always doing. Case you're

51:21

disgusting. And I'm never taking you anywhere

51:23

again. You're out. Well look guys, if

51:25

you have an axling unfilted, send them

51:28

on in. We want your axelion filters.

51:30

Send your embarrassing stories to us at

51:32

Life On Cup podcast so that we

51:34

can share them next week. We have

51:36

a few good ones actually. We have.

51:38

Hey, it's time for suck and sweet.

51:40

Should I kick this off? My suck

51:42

this week is I need a new

51:44

plus one. No, I'm joking. My suck

51:46

this week is because I did the

51:49

Dancing with the Stars and I've told

51:51

you I haven't been able to get

51:53

my migraine Botox for months and it's

51:55

getting really bad. So my suck is

51:58

that like I'm well overdue. I definitely

52:00

wouldn't have been able to hold my neck up

52:02

and dance if I got it. And that was

52:04

a sacrifice that I made. But I'm going again

52:06

next week, but like I went to bed last

52:08

night, vomited. It was the first. Oh my God,

52:11

that's awful. First migraine I've had in months. I've

52:13

been getting really bad headaches, but I feel like

52:15

they've been like escalating. So the first one last

52:17

night, but my bow talks is booked for next

52:19

week, so that's amazing. Yesterday I got approved to

52:21

go and see Ben. So I'm going to Italy

52:23

it will have been I think about three and

52:26

a half months, I think it's about 14 weeks

52:28

since I would have seen him. For context, when

52:30

people say approve, so because we do radio, we

52:32

have to be here for records, for radios for

52:34

the show. And so it's a really big deal

52:36

for the radio network, to say yes to remote

52:38

recordings. It's almost been like, since day one, they've

52:41

been like, Nova, would you do a remote recording?

52:43

Even though we can do remote podcast recording, we've

52:45

got a proven track record, it's very feasible. Radio

52:47

is just a different kettle of fish. We have

52:49

bosses, which is weird for us, you know. I

52:51

mean, we know, this is our bread and butter,

52:54

we know this inside out, we know we can

52:56

do audio anywhere in the world, but radio, whilst

52:58

they know that you can do it, because people

53:00

do it, so like loads of radio hosts record

53:02

overseas. They've just been cautious with us doing it,

53:04

and I don't know why, but I did go

53:06

up yesterday and... kindly explained that my life is

53:09

deteriorating at a rapid pace. You're like I will

53:11

quit unless you let me go. Pretty much all

53:13

work guys. So it's been like I haven't seen

53:15

him since Christmas time since that holiday. So we

53:17

have a one week break which I have gone

53:19

over many times for the week, but when it's

53:21

two days worth of traveling, by the time you

53:24

get there, you've got five days and you're jet

53:26

lagged. And so I just went up and said,

53:28

hey, can I do an extra week? It's a

53:30

couple of recordings overseas. It'll be great audio. It's

53:32

exactly the same. And they said, yes. So it's

53:34

just, yeah. So we've got a week over there.

53:36

which is amazing. Yeah, so I'm just gonna go

53:39

over. I'm gonna have a lot of sex, a

53:41

lot of pasta, Sherry, Jane, Meyer are gonna come

53:43

for a couple of days. I get to watch

53:45

Ben and his new team for just one game.

53:47

So I'm really excited and that is happening in

53:49

four weeks. Oh my God, that's so amazing. That's

53:51

the best suite ever. I know that this has

53:54

been something that you've been like worried about the

53:56

response. So I'm glad it was good. I know

53:58

I know I'm breaking. I'm going to know I'm

54:00

breaking the world. the nothingness because my week's been

54:02

pretty damn good. It must be nice. It must

54:04

be very nice. My sweet though for the week,

54:07

there's been a couple but like the real highlight

54:09

was on the weekend just passed, my beautiful girlfriend

54:11

Farah had her baby shower and Farah was my

54:13

minder on the bachelor which probably sounds really weird

54:15

to anyone but basically when you're a contestant on

54:17

the bachelor you get given a minder who takes

54:19

care of you who takes care of you. You

54:22

know, you take care of yourself. Don't drink too

54:24

much. They're almost like your buffer as well. They're

54:26

your communication to like. anyone outside of the mansion.

54:28

So the big producers or anyone like if you

54:30

have a problem you can go to them and

54:32

then they'll report back. Yeah absolutely so you have

54:34

like they're on three days each basically you have

54:37

two minders that live in the house with you

54:39

they're with you all the time. They have a

54:41

bedroom and they have a bedroom and they have

54:43

a bedroom. It's well for us it was like

54:45

upstairs it was like upstairs it was like upstairs

54:47

so she's kind of like mom of the house

54:49

and we've stayed really really like long journey to

54:52

becoming. a mom and so seeing her at you

54:54

know 30 almost 34 weeks pregnant and getting to

54:56

a place where she feels like she's allowing herself

54:58

to believe that it's going to happen was just

55:00

like such a beautiful thing to be part of

55:02

I'm so happy for her honestly she's going to

55:04

be the most incredible mom and yeah it was

55:07

just really special it was really like I feel

55:09

so grateful for her that she's at this point

55:11

yeah yeah that's really nice because from what you

55:13

have told us because from what you have told

55:15

us the sweetest, sweetest girl. And so like, yeah,

55:17

very giving to other people and it's very

55:19

giving to other people this.

55:22

it's of my like, it's

55:24

her time to experience all right,

55:26

Brit. I snort too much. All right, one

55:28

of my of here. Please get

55:30

your friends. accidentally unfilters me? cards. You

55:32

can send them all into our Instagram. Just put

55:35

a little title at not too

55:37

much. gun card or All right,

55:39

let's get out of here.

55:41

Please I'm your where to accent on

55:43

filters, coming in, accent on filters, so

55:45

we You can send them

55:47

all to, our Instagram. so we

55:50

know Just put a little

55:52

title to, the top where to,

55:54

so we Uncard Accent to, so we

55:56

know where to, we know where

55:58

to put them. so we know

56:00

where to, If you haven't

56:02

subscribed or watched our out. It's

56:05

such a you are absolutely

56:07

missing it It's such a

56:09

vibe and it's so much

56:11

fun actually watch this a different

56:13

context when you can

56:15

actually watch how I goes

56:17

down instead of just listening

56:20

to it. I actually

56:22

love it. yeah, if you've enjoyed the episode,

56:24

share it with I feel like

56:26

know the you know, it's

56:28

a very fun, day, day, day,

56:30

way to watch the share, and

56:32

share, But if you've enjoyed

56:35

the episode, because, it with

56:37

a friend. we love, You

56:39

guys know the drill. because we

56:41

love, because we tell your dog,

56:43

tell your friends and

56:45

share the love love, because we love,

56:48

because love we love, love, because we love,

56:50

love, love,