Episode Transcript
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0:00
This is open mind.
0:02
Welcome to a brand
0:04
new week. Here is
0:07
your mantra. I release
0:10
the need for
0:13
external validation. I'm
0:15
your host, Gemma Spek, and
0:17
I'm here to guide you
0:19
towards a more centered and
0:22
fulfilling life. Each week I'll
0:24
share personal stories and insights
0:26
that are focused on a
0:28
specific mantra plus journal prompts
0:31
and a weekly challenge for
0:33
all of us to help
0:35
put it into action. Think
0:37
of mantra as your mental
0:39
reset button, a way to
0:42
stay centered as you juggle,
0:44
work, school, family, and whatever else
0:46
life throws at you. Each mantra
0:48
is a simple, powerful phrase that
0:50
you can repeat to refocus your
0:52
thoughts and bring a little bit
0:54
of calm into your day. It's a
0:57
small tool with a big impact,
0:59
clearing your mind, lifting your mood,
1:01
and rooting you in the present.
1:03
If you've listened to my other
1:05
show, The Psychology of Your 20s,
1:07
you'll know that I'm all about
1:09
those little nuggets of insight that
1:11
make a big impact. So whether
1:13
you are looking for some extra
1:15
inspiration, or you're just trying to
1:17
ground yourself amidst the chaos, you
1:19
have come to the right place.
1:21
At Open Mind, we value your
1:23
support. Share your thoughts on social
1:26
media and remember to rate, review,
1:28
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1:30
discover the show. For more
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early access, and ad-free listening,
1:37
join our Open Mind Plus
1:39
community on Apple podcast. This
1:41
week I'll catch you up on what's
1:44
been going on in my life,
1:46
and then we'll dive into today's
1:48
mantra I release the need for
1:50
external validation This mantra is really
1:52
about finding confidence within yourself and
1:54
really breaking free from the need
1:56
for others approval to validate what
1:58
you're doing in your life So
2:00
stick around, we'll be right
2:02
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a mission to inspire mindful. it
10:12
simply feels great it feels good
10:14
it builds our self-worth it gives
10:16
us a sense that we belong
10:18
but it is not that be all an
10:20
end-all of who we are and nor should
10:23
we allow it to be. It is probably at
10:25
this point that I should really
10:27
articulate what internal validation is as
10:30
an alternative to external validation. So
10:32
external validation takes a lot of
10:34
forms and some of them are
10:37
important. So people showing you that
10:39
they care about you, receiving an
10:41
award at work, getting a bonus
10:44
or a grade you really deserve,
10:46
being told that you have inspired
10:49
someone. Those are all important forms
10:51
of external validation. But then there
10:53
is the kind of validation
10:55
that we can't necessarily rely
10:57
on. So compliments, praise, social
11:00
media validation through likes, comments,
11:02
DMs, being publicly recognized as
11:04
successful, having accomplished something. We
11:06
really do need to strike
11:08
a healthy balance. These things
11:10
are really, really nice, but
11:12
they are not everything. So
11:15
external validation comes from the
11:17
outside, comes from beyond yourself.
11:19
Internal validation on the other
11:21
hand. comes from within and
11:23
emerges from something called yourself
11:25
concept. Self-concept is basically the
11:28
perception that you have of
11:30
yourself, whether it's a good
11:32
one or a bad one.
11:34
So internal validation, what does
11:36
that feel like? Well, it
11:38
feels like being proud of
11:40
yourself. It feels like celebrating
11:43
your own wins without needing
11:45
others to see them
11:47
as important. trusting yourself,
11:49
respecting your boundaries, speaking
11:51
positively about yourself, true
11:53
self-acceptance. Here is kind
11:55
of how I have
11:57
always pictured the balance
11:59
between External and internal validation
12:02
should make up 80 to
12:04
90% of who we believe
12:06
we are. So if we
12:08
think about validation as a
12:10
diet, right? Internal validation,
12:12
it's our whole foods, it's
12:14
our fiber, it's our nutrients,
12:17
our whole grains, our fruits,
12:19
our vegetables, it's the real
12:21
nourishing stuff. External validation
12:24
is the delicious cupcake. It's
12:26
the glass of champagne, it's
12:28
the pizza on a Friday
12:30
night. All amazing things, beautiful
12:33
things, yummy things, but you
12:35
cannot build a healthy lifestyle
12:37
or a healthy self-concept on
12:39
treats, even though they taste so good.
12:41
So the danger with exclusively
12:44
tying our self-worth to something
12:46
that exists outside of you
12:48
in your control, whether that
12:50
is other's opinions or job
12:53
performance or success, The danger
12:55
is that those elements are
12:57
actually quite fickle so they
12:59
can disappear or be shaken very
13:02
easily. Whereas when you have
13:04
a strong self-concept and a
13:06
strong internal validation system, that
13:08
is something that you are
13:11
in control of. So let's
13:13
think about validation from your
13:15
achievements as an example. So
13:18
if that is your only
13:20
source of confidence and self-worth.
13:22
What happens during those periods
13:25
where you're slowing down, when you're
13:27
burnt out, when you're not achieving
13:29
anything, because no one can be
13:31
doing that all the time? Also,
13:34
let's ask the big question, what
13:36
happens when you fail? That's something
13:38
we are all destined to
13:40
experience at some point. Let's
13:42
think about two people in this
13:45
instance. So let's call person one
13:47
Lauren. And Lauren is 27. She's
13:49
always been an overachiever. She went
13:52
from being a valedictorian, being a
13:54
merit scholar at college or university.
13:56
There she had, you know, the
13:59
perfect internships. on her resume. She
14:01
graduated into the perfect graduate job.
14:03
Then she moved up the wrecks
14:05
really quickly. You know, Lauren has
14:08
always been told that she is
14:10
a bit of a wonderkin. She
14:12
is killing it. She's pushed herself
14:15
year after year. She feeds off
14:17
praise and the praise has always
14:19
come to her. Then we have
14:21
Jasmine, person two. Jasmine is the
14:23
same as Lauren. She has everything
14:25
that Lauren has. She's also killing
14:27
it at her job. She's also
14:29
done very well in her past,
14:31
but Jasmine also focuses on small
14:33
wins in her personal life. So
14:35
the thing that she is most
14:38
proud of is her kindness towards
14:40
others and that people come to
14:42
her with their problems. She's also,
14:44
you know, really proud of the
14:46
relationship that she has with her
14:48
family and how she shows up
14:50
for them. She simply just likes
14:52
herself as a person beyond achievement
14:55
and beyond work. Neither of these
14:57
two people, Lauren or Jasmine, is
14:59
any better than the other, but
15:02
consider what happens when they
15:04
encounter a failure. For Lauren,
15:06
this is going to be
15:08
devastating because her entire self-worth
15:10
is built on something that
15:12
could crumble at any time. But
15:15
for Jasmine, her job is a really
15:17
important part of who she is. Her
15:19
achievements make her feel proud, but if
15:21
it was all to disappear, she would
15:23
still know who she is, and she
15:25
would still be able to validate those
15:27
parts of herself. The other thing that
15:30
relying too heavily on external validation does
15:32
is hinder our decision making, because we
15:34
are considering other people more than we
15:36
consider ourselves, and what would make us
15:39
happy. Think about wanting to quit your
15:41
well-paying job, your good job for something
15:43
that you are passionate about. If you
15:45
are reliant on external validation, a lot
15:48
of people are going to think that
15:50
you are making a bad decision. And
15:52
a lot of the time when you're
15:54
pursuing your passion, you are not going
15:57
to be reinforced by praise. People are not going
15:59
to be... a clap for you. So that
16:01
can really sway you. That can cause
16:03
you to stay where you are out
16:06
of fear of upsetting others. And what
16:08
they think you owe them, especially people
16:10
like family, parents, mentors, they're
16:12
going to want you to
16:15
stay on the safe, secure path,
16:17
right? Each of us has an
16:19
internal compass that hopefully we can
16:21
use to find north. And north
16:24
is really the life we truly
16:26
want. The dreams we have. The
16:28
dreams we have. the decisions we
16:30
want to make. External validation
16:32
is like a magnet that
16:35
keeps disrupting the compass. It's
16:37
pulling you away from north
16:39
and towards directions that aren't
16:41
truly yours, directions that are
16:43
set by others' expectations, opinions,
16:45
or approval, and because of
16:47
this push and pull, we
16:49
really do start to lose
16:52
faith in our own compass
16:54
with second-guessing its guidance because
16:56
it doesn't seem to be
16:58
doing its job. Instead of
17:00
really trusting the pull towards
17:02
what feels right for us, we
17:04
follow paths that look good to
17:06
others, that are lit up by
17:09
applause, praise, but which may leave
17:11
us feeling very lost, very unfulfilled.
17:13
I've seen the consequences of this
17:15
in my own life. I think
17:17
about a relationship in particular that
17:19
I stayed in for far too
17:21
long because it made my parents
17:23
happy and I didn't want to
17:25
admit that this wasn't the love
17:27
of my life and disappoint them.
17:30
I think about people I chased
17:32
when I should have let them
17:34
go because occasionally they would turn
17:36
around and give me crumbs and
17:39
validate me. I think about how
17:41
I used to say yes to
17:43
everything and overextend myself at work
17:45
because I loved it when my
17:48
bosses praised me even when I
17:50
didn't have a personal life. The
17:52
praise was feeling that space that
17:54
should have been filled by self-accomplishment
17:56
and something that was self-fulfilling. The
17:59
compass was being pulled, you
18:01
know, I couldn't tell north.
18:03
So what happens when you
18:05
release the need for external
18:07
validation? Oh my gosh,
18:09
it's just the most refreshing experience
18:12
ever. You start to trust yourself,
18:14
your instincts, your desires, your voice.
18:16
You start to do what you
18:18
want to do. It is freedom.
18:21
in the purest form you get
18:23
to redefine success on your own
18:25
terms, make choices that feel aligned
18:27
with your values, embrace who you
18:29
are without an apology, you get
18:32
to wear what you want, be
18:34
where you want to be, eat
18:36
what you feel like, do what
18:38
you want to do. I really
18:41
think that the weight of expectation
18:43
lifts and you realize that the
18:45
only person you need to impress
18:48
is yourself and it's not about
18:50
rejecting connection or feedback. It's about
18:52
knowing that your work isn't dependent
18:55
on someone else's validation. You can
18:57
really just finally breathe. All right.
18:59
I know this is a really nuanced topic,
19:01
but I hope this mantra serves
19:04
as a reminder that you don't
19:06
need anyone else's approval to be
19:09
your best self, because you already
19:11
really have everything that you
19:13
need within you. Coming up, let's
19:15
talk strategy and how we can
19:18
put into action our decision to
19:20
release the need for external validation.
19:23
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Now that we've looked at the meaning
21:01
behind today's mantra, it's time to
21:03
discuss how we can create the
21:06
space, the habits, and the mindset
21:08
to release our desire for external
21:10
validation. The first step to doing
21:12
this is really decentering the approval
21:15
of others and putting yourself at
21:17
the center. What we think about
21:19
ourselves needs to matter first. So
21:22
this also really requires building ourselves
21:24
concept beyond... external things that occur
21:26
or define us. So I want
21:28
to give you a really beautiful
21:31
exercise for getting back in touch
21:33
with what you love about yourself
21:36
and it's an exercise that focuses
21:38
on delineating between what you like
21:40
about yourself because others have told
21:43
you they're likable and what you
21:45
actually feel proud of when no
21:47
one else is around. I want
21:50
you to either write down or
21:52
make a mental list of 10
21:54
things that you like about yourself
21:56
that has nothing to do with
21:58
your achievements, your looks, or what...
22:00
presses other people. So often,
22:02
I think when we ask
22:04
to define ourselves, we characterize
22:06
ourselves in regards to our
22:08
job, our accomplishments, our role
22:10
in others' lives. I'm a
22:13
sister, I'm a partner, I'm
22:15
a girlfriend, I'm a wife,
22:17
I'm a husband. What other
22:19
people have told us we're
22:21
good at or our physical
22:23
appearance, but instead, focus on what
22:26
is entirely yours. to hold very
22:28
near and dear. For example, I
22:30
like that I am curious, even
22:33
though that might not benefit anyone
22:35
else. I like that I am
22:37
generous. I like that I get
22:40
chills when I listen to music.
22:42
I like that I notice beauty.
22:44
I like that I'm empathetic. Those
22:46
are all me. So what and who are
22:48
you? The reason this can be so
22:51
profound is that it bolsters your
22:53
ability to validate yourself on your
22:55
own by really honoring and acknowledging
22:57
your positive attribute strengths and achievements
22:59
which might not actually get the
23:01
recognition from others but which manner
23:03
to you. And the reason they
23:05
might not get the recognition from
23:07
others is because they exist in
23:09
a very private space within your
23:11
soul and your mind. This is
23:14
very similar to an exercise that
23:16
I like to call who are
23:18
you without applause. It's basically intended
23:20
to detach your sense of self from
23:22
the external validation we seek. So it's
23:24
a hypothetical exercise based on three questions.
23:26
But firstly, you need to find a
23:28
quiet space, just you, just yourself, and
23:30
give yourself five minutes to think about
23:32
a life, think about a reality, when
23:34
no one is defined by success, no
23:36
one is applauded, no one is famous,
23:38
no one is famous, no one is
23:40
famous, no one is famous, no one
23:42
is famous, no one is famous, no
23:44
one is famous, no one is famous,
23:46
no one is famous, no We are
23:48
just very much allowed to exist
23:50
in whatever form makes us
23:53
happy. Now imagine, who are
23:55
you in this life? Who have you
23:57
chosen to be? What do you love
23:59
to do? What choices would you make
24:01
if no one was watching
24:04
or commenting? What brings
24:06
you, joy, fulfillment, peace,
24:08
purely for yourself in
24:10
this reality? This
24:13
hypothetical can really act
24:15
as a guide to
24:17
make more informed decisions,
24:19
which still account for
24:21
external validation, but which
24:23
also demote it to
24:25
that 10% every so
24:27
often position. And that's
24:30
really what this mantra
24:32
is all about, making
24:34
external validation optional, not
24:36
a necessity. And finally,
24:38
finally, I really want you to
24:40
get comfortable with the idea of disappointing
24:42
people. you know, as a recovering people-plazer,
24:44
let me tell you, this is not
24:47
easy, and I am still guilty of
24:49
sometimes sacrificing my own needs for those
24:51
around me. I used to think that
24:53
it was because I was a good
24:55
person and I was a nice person
24:57
and I wanted to make them happy.
24:59
Now I realize that I think deep
25:01
down it was because I really wanted
25:04
people to like me. And I'm still
25:06
a good person, but I'm a good
25:08
person, even if I don't have to
25:10
sacrifice my boundaries. It was a very
25:12
hard pill. to swallow, but it was
25:14
true, you know, to peel back
25:16
a few layers for you as
25:18
a child. I was not very
25:20
well accepted. I wasn't well liked.
25:22
I was bullied. I felt unwanted.
25:25
And so as a survival mechanism,
25:27
I quickly realized that everyone likes
25:29
the person who said yes to
25:31
everything. Everyone likes the person who
25:33
puts them first. And I continued
25:35
to be that person throughout my
25:37
teen years, throughout my early 20s.
25:39
You needed a six AM pickup
25:41
from the airport? I was there.
25:43
You wanted to cancel our plans
25:45
last minute because your boyfriend wanted
25:47
to hang out. That's fine. I'll
25:49
forgive you. You needed me to
25:51
stay late at the office even
25:53
though it wasn't my work and
25:55
you didn't time manage. Sign me
25:57
up. I was confusing liking with
25:59
respect. and external validation with self-respect.
26:02
So here's what I want
26:04
you to start doing. I
26:06
want you to start asking
26:08
yourself, what is the cost
26:10
of saying yes? Is
26:12
people-pleasing making people happy?
26:14
Is it going to cost
26:16
you your time, your energy,
26:18
your agency, your choice, your
26:20
authenticity, your happiness, your freedom?
26:22
Well then it's not worth it in
26:24
exchange for them only liking you
26:26
because of what you can do for
26:29
them? What is the cost of saying no?
26:31
Because if it's just them not
26:33
liking you and therefore not validating
26:35
you, well if someone only likes
26:38
you because you say yes all
26:40
the time and because of what
26:42
you can do for them, that's
26:44
not a real connection or a
26:46
relationship. That is an exploitative
26:49
deal you've got there. You have
26:51
to release the need for external
26:53
validation and then you can
26:55
also release so many of
26:57
those relationships as well. I
27:06
want to show a quote that
27:08
I feel perfectly captures the heart
27:10
of this week's mantra, so here
27:12
is our deep thought of the
27:14
day. If you are ever tempted
27:16
to look for outside approval, realize
27:18
that you have compromised your integrity.
27:21
If you need a witness, be
27:23
your own. That is from Epictetus.
27:25
Let's just repeat that last part.
27:27
If you need a witness, be your
27:29
own. A big part of being human
27:31
is wanting to be seen. Think
27:33
about when you were a child
27:36
and you did a cartwheel or
27:38
a handstand in the poor. And
27:40
it didn't really feel important unless
27:42
your mum or dad had seen
27:45
it too. It's wide into us,
27:47
but as you get older, it
27:49
becomes more than handstands. It becomes
27:51
career choices. It becomes self-expression, your
27:54
sense of self, that sometimes we
27:56
need other people to approve of
27:58
and believe in. So, no way. This
28:00
is your life. This is
28:02
your happiness. And if it
28:04
feels good to you, who cares
28:06
if other people don't agree?
28:10
Now, let's take a moment to pause
28:12
and reflect on today's mantra. In a
28:15
few seconds, you'll hear a custom music
28:17
track designed to create space for you
28:19
to sit with these insights and think
28:22
about how this mantra could show up
28:24
for you and your life this week
28:26
or even longer. And of course, if
28:28
this practice isn't your style, if it
28:31
doesn't resonate with you, that's okay. You
28:33
can always just skip ahead about 30
28:35
seconds, but as you settle in. Keep
28:38
our mantra in mind. I release the
28:40
need for external validation, let it
28:42
guide your thoughts as the
28:44
music plays, and just give
28:46
yourself that moment to really
28:48
connect with what this mantra
28:50
means for you. Up
29:22
next, we are going to talk about
29:24
how to put these insights into real
29:27
action and bring this mantra to life.
29:29
I'll share some journal prompts and of
29:31
course our weekly challenge. Stick around for
29:33
more after this quick break. I've
29:38
been working with a nervous dietitian
29:40
for the last six months, and
29:43
it's been life-changing. I've lost weight,
29:45
healed my relationship with food, and
29:47
have way more energy. Working with
29:49
a dietitian online to create a
29:51
personalized nutrition plan was so easy
29:54
thanks to nourish. The best part,
29:56
I pay zero dollars out of
29:58
pocket because nourish accepts hundreds of
30:00
insurance plans. 94% of paid... Where'd
30:03
you get
30:06
those shoots?
30:09
Where'd you get those shoes? get those
30:11
shoes? Easy. they're from DSW DSW
30:13
has the exact right shoes for
30:15
whatever you're into right now. into
30:17
know, like the sneakers that
30:19
make office hours feel like hours feel
30:21
like The boots that turn grocery
30:23
turn into runways and all the
30:25
styles that show off the
30:27
many sides of you many sides of you,
30:29
from and everything in between because
30:32
you do it all in
30:34
really great shoes. Find a shoe
30:36
in really great your DSW store or
30:38
you at.com. or DS. back. Let's dive into
30:40
how you can bring this week's mantra
30:42
to life in your daily routine, starting
30:45
with a journal practice. And if you
30:47
don't have your journal with you, that
30:49
is no problem at all. Simply just
30:51
hold these questions in your mind, think
30:54
about your answers, but here are our
30:56
three prompts to help you explore and
30:58
connect with this mantra on a deeper
31:00
level. First,
31:03
when was the last
31:06
time you felt defined
31:08
by someone else's opinions?
31:10
How did that impact
31:12
your decision-making or your
31:14
emotions? Next, who or what
31:16
taught you to measure your
31:18
worth through external approval? And
31:21
how can you begin to
31:23
rewrite that narrative? And finally,
31:25
how do you show up
31:27
differently when you are not
31:30
concerned about being judged? or
31:32
seeking approval. Okay, I've given you
31:34
plenty to reflect on, but there
31:36
are still more to explore. Each
31:38
week, as the loyal listeners will
31:40
know, I'll leave you with a
31:42
challenge inspired by our mantra. It
31:44
is all about taking these ideas
31:46
to the next level, right, turning
31:48
reflection into action, so you can
31:50
make meaningful shifts in your daily
31:52
life. I also want to do
31:54
some check-ins so that we can
31:56
hold ourselves accountable. You can reach
31:58
out to me at... mantra open
32:00
mind to let me know how
32:02
the challenge is going and next
32:05
week we'll do a recap on
32:07
how things went. I might even
32:09
share a few personal stories with
32:11
your permission of course to help
32:13
encourage others to participate in the
32:15
challenge in the future and remember
32:17
this is a two-way street so
32:19
I'll keep you in the loop
32:21
and share how this journey is
32:23
also unfolding for me as well. So
32:25
let's talk about last week's challenge.
32:27
As a reminder, our mantra last
32:29
week was I am at peace
32:31
with my past, present, and future.
32:34
This mantra was really showing up
32:36
for me last week. I was
32:38
thinking so much about past versions
32:40
of me, perhaps even after doing
32:43
that episode. It was really inspiring
32:45
me and really bringing up memories
32:47
around who I was in high
32:49
school, who I was in university,
32:52
who I was in. previous relationships.
32:54
And I think that that mantra
32:56
actually came at a perfect time. For me,
32:58
it came into my mind at a perfect
33:00
time when I was juggling who it was
33:03
in the past and how to become a
33:05
better version in the future. And I think
33:07
similar themes came up for many of you
33:09
as well. So I want to share some
33:11
of the D.M.s we got from Listeners about
33:14
last week's episode. So this one's from Victoria.
33:16
How do you find peace with a part
33:18
of your past that still feels unresolved
33:21
unresolved? I think you have
33:23
to realize that sometimes time is the
33:25
resolution. How I picture it
33:27
is waves crashing over stone and
33:29
turning it into pebbles or washing
33:31
over bottles and turning them into
33:33
sea glass. Time is the thing
33:35
that really does dull the edges.
33:37
It makes things lighter. It makes
33:39
us see things differently. So if
33:41
there is still a real heaviness
33:43
with something from the past, sometimes
33:45
you've done all that you can
33:47
do and you just have to
33:49
let. time kind of take its
33:51
course. This next one is from
33:54
Jay. Is it possible to
33:56
find peace with mistakes if
33:58
they've had lasting consequences? Simple
34:00
answer, yes. Yes, I believe so.
34:03
Obviously, if the consequences are
34:05
devastating, it's going to be
34:07
hard, but you have to
34:09
find a way to give
34:11
yourself closure. I think about
34:13
people who have made huge,
34:15
terrible, sometimes life-costing mistakes, who
34:17
are forgiven and who forgive
34:19
themselves. The moment has happened,
34:21
the mistake, it's been made. Now
34:23
you really have to decide whether
34:26
you and regret want to be
34:28
friends for life. or whether it's
34:30
time to stop emotionally punishing
34:32
yourself. The way I
34:34
always think about it
34:36
would be you would
34:38
forgive a close friend, a
34:40
sibling, a loved one, if you
34:43
found out what they had done.
34:45
So if you could find it
34:47
in your heart to forgive
34:50
them for the actions
34:52
you've committed, you have
34:54
the right to forgive yourself as well.
34:56
And this is a bit of a
34:58
tough one, but this week I invite
35:01
you to practice saying no to at
35:03
least one request or invitation without over
35:05
explaining yourself or seeking approval. So it
35:07
might be an invitation to dinner that
35:09
you just really don't want to go
35:11
to. It might be someone asking you
35:13
to do something at work. Just a
35:15
simple, no, I'm sorry, I don't have
35:17
time to do that or sorry, not
35:19
today, maybe another time. is what we
35:21
are asking for here. So on your
35:23
boundaries, and reflect on how it feels
35:25
to prioritize your needs. How does it
35:28
feel to have the afternoon to yourself?
35:30
How does it feel to just be
35:32
able to focus on your own work?
35:35
And as a reminder, reach out to
35:37
AtMatra Open Mind to share how this
35:39
week's challenge is working for you. All
35:41
right, as we wrap up this
35:44
week's episode, I want to share
35:46
a few final thoughts that I
35:48
have about this mantra. My key
35:50
takeaway. And what I really hope
35:52
I've impressed on you all is
35:54
that external validation and internal validation,
35:57
they do work together. But whereas
35:59
external validation is... optional. Internal
36:01
validation is an absolute necessity. So
36:03
you really have to strike the
36:05
right balance. The balance between knowing
36:08
who you are, what you like,
36:10
what you care about, your assets,
36:12
your values, your beautiful parts of
36:15
your character and your soul, versus
36:17
what other people are impressed by.
36:19
what other people are impressed by matters
36:21
a lot less. And I know
36:23
it's something that we feel very
36:26
called to prioritize, but just consider
36:28
how maybe your life would look
36:30
different if you put it a
36:32
little bit lower down on the
36:34
ladder of what's important to you.
36:36
Your worth isn't something as well
36:38
that can be measured by likes,
36:40
by applause, or anyone else's opinion.
36:42
It is something you can carry
36:44
with you. It is steady, it
36:46
is unwavering, it is definitely not
36:48
fickle. Releasing the need for external
36:51
validation isn't about shutting out
36:53
the world. It is about
36:55
reclaiming your power and trusting
36:57
yourself to be your own
36:59
guide, trusting the compass. So tune
37:01
into your inner voice on what
37:04
feels right for you and let
37:06
that be enough. Thank
37:11
you for joining Mantra, an exclusive
37:13
Open Mind Original, powered by Pave
37:15
Studios. At Open Mind, we value
37:17
your support. Share your thoughts on
37:20
social media and remember to rate,
37:22
review, and follow mantra to help
37:24
others discover the show. For ad-free
37:26
listening and early access to Mantra,
37:29
with me, Jemis Begg, we invite
37:31
you to subscribe to Open Mind
37:33
Plus on Apple podcast. I'll share
37:36
another insightful and introspective mantra with
37:38
you next Monday. Until then. Keep
37:40
showing up for yourself and your
37:42
journey. I'm Gemma Speg. See you
37:44
next week. Matra is hosted by
37:47
me, Gemma Speg, and is
37:49
an open-mind original powered by
37:51
Pave Studios. This episode was
37:53
brought to life by the
37:55
mantra team, Max Cutler, Kristen
37:57
Acevedo, Ron Shapiro, Stacey Warren
37:59
Kerr, Sarah Carroll and Paul Leiberskin.
38:01
Thank you for listening. listening.
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