0:02

I'm Annemarie Cox and this

0:04

and this is another day

0:06

with Anna Marie we've

0:08

been doing this show for show

0:11

and eighteen days. The thing thing is,

0:13

it It says with Anna Marie but

0:15

there is a team behind

0:17

this show. this thought.

0:19

thought Today would be

0:21

a good day to introduce the team. the

0:24

get a sense of what it's

0:26

been like to do this show. this show

0:28

a deep dive into

0:30

this unprecedented and wild

0:32

period in in American history

0:35

and culture. So we're just going

0:37

to just gonna have a discussion. and

0:39

and it's gonna include. to the team

0:41

behind the show. I wanna start. I want in

0:43

an orderly fashion. an orderly with

0:45

Andrew. Andrew. Go for it. it. Hey,

0:48

how's it going? I'm Andrew.

0:50

And yeah, it's it's been, it's

0:52

been interesting 100 plus days working days working

0:54

been show. have It's been nice to

0:56

have this group times, in with of

0:58

the three times, not because of the

1:00

three of you, but because of

1:02

the type of things we talk

1:04

about on I'm grateful grateful for this

1:06

experience because it's been nice to

1:08

sort of help process all the

1:10

things. And I get to hear

1:12

the show before anyone else does.

1:14

anyone else does. and my mistakes, which is

1:16

why I'm grateful for you for you.

1:19

Bo, how How about you? I'm I'm

1:21

Friedlander. I am a producer on the show.

1:23

I was at one point the executive

1:25

producer on the show and a different

1:27

avatar of it. And you were a

1:29

guest? of it. also a guest, that's true.

1:31

I was one of the more fire

1:33

was one of the guests. So I would say

1:35

it has been torture for me to

1:37

be me to be neck in

1:40

politics again, especially with

1:42

Trump on the ascendancy. It's

1:45

been interesting to be working in

1:47

this area again. area again

1:49

and painful because the

1:51

last time I did it time I

1:53

did it, Obama became and this

1:56

this time it's a different

1:58

country we're living in. in. introducing

2:00

herself last is actually one

2:03

of the most important people

2:05

on the show where everybody's

2:07

important. Ella is our youth.

2:09

We're all a bunch of

2:12

other of olds. Ella represents

2:14

the next generation. My

2:17

name is Ella and I do

2:19

the social media and I sit

2:21

in on all the recordings. It's

2:23

been crazy. I've never worked in

2:25

politics. I've always been passionate about

2:27

it and passionate about my own

2:29

rights and the rights of others

2:31

and I've learned so much in

2:33

the last 190 days that I

2:35

truly would not have learned if

2:37

not for working on this show.

2:40

And yes, it's very sad and scary,

2:42

the things that we talk about sometimes,

2:44

but I find a lot of comfort

2:46

being able to do that here. With

2:48

you guys. All right. Well, we've established

2:51

that we're a little bit of an

2:53

encounter group for each other, like this

2:55

is group therapy. Although this is our

2:57

behind the scenes episode, people are probably

2:59

not that interested about how we set

3:01

up mics and whatnot or how my

3:04

animals interrupt the show occasionally. Although, I

3:06

guess we decided as a group that's

3:08

going to be allowed today. And if

3:10

you do have questions about technical stuff,

3:12

ask away in the comments and maybe

3:15

we'll do an episode on that. There

3:17

are technical issues and we use

3:20

some interesting technology and lots of

3:22

editing. So the question that has

3:24

been on my mind that I

3:26

wanted to bring out in the

3:29

public, where you are now, it's

3:31

been a little bit since the

3:33

election. And are

3:36

we still processing? Are we

3:38

making plans? Like, what stage

3:40

of grief are we in?

3:42

What's the stage before denial

3:44

that's like even more disbelief?

3:46

I think I'm stuck there.

3:48

I think it's definitely a

3:51

coping mechanism. Yeah, it just

3:53

feels so surreal. And I

3:55

definitely catch myself being ignorant.

3:57

the point of avoidance. I

3:59

don't think I can stay

4:01

there for too much longer

4:03

because there's already real consequences

4:05

happening. Yeah. I'm in a

4:08

very similar stage. I don't

4:10

feel like it's truly hit

4:12

me that he will be

4:14

our president. I think it

4:16

probably will in January. I

4:18

mean, I would be shocked

4:20

if it didn't and worried

4:22

for myself. Yeah, I'm still

4:25

grieving. I'm

4:28

scared. I have made no plans.

4:30

I have told a lot of

4:32

my friends about how you can

4:34

order an abortion pill from the

4:37

website you told me about Anna,

4:39

which is remind me the name

4:41

of it. I believe it is

4:43

Plan C. Plan C. But also

4:45

you can Google, I need an

4:48

abortion. And it will come up.

4:50

And it is, so people know,

4:52

it is ordering them from overseas.

4:54

You can order them in advance.

4:57

It's kind of no questions asked,

4:59

so it's a really great resource.

5:01

Yeah. I'm sad. I'm really sad

5:03

for a lot of people in

5:05

this country and for myself, and

5:08

it hasn't hit me yet, but

5:10

it will tune, I'm sure. Well,

5:12

I've been in, I told you

5:14

so, mode. I spoke to, my

5:17

cousins are on the advanced team

5:19

that had been since the first

5:21

Clinton administration. Evan thought that Harris

5:23

would pull it out. Wendy and

5:25

I were both of the opinion

5:28

that the United States was too

5:30

racist and sexist to do it.

5:32

I feel like Cassandra. Now, the

5:34

second thing that's going on is

5:37

Robert Plutchick's wheel of emotions. Robert

5:39

Plutchick proposed a psycho evolutionary classification

5:41

approach for general emotional responses. And

5:43

there's eight primary ones anger fear

5:45

sadness disgust surprise anticipation trust and

5:48

joy and when you have grief

5:50

all of them are hitting you

5:52

at the same time in different

5:54

ways Grief is so hard to

5:57

deal with because it is every

5:59

emotion It's absolutely every motion all

6:01

at once. Now, I have a

6:03

hard time finding trust and joy.

6:05

I guess on some really negative

6:08

level, I trust that I'm probably

6:10

okay because I'm a cis white

6:12

male. But that doesn't feel good

6:14

because I have a lot of

6:16

friends who are not cis white

6:19

males. I feel good that all

6:21

of the Trumpy people that I

6:23

know in this area aren't going

6:25

to burn my house down in

6:28

some active civil defiance. because they

6:30

lost the election. Glad that's not

6:32

going to happen. But that means

6:34

that I was already living in

6:36

a trauma state expecting that to

6:39

happen. So I think where I'm

6:41

at right now is, fuck this,

6:43

I'm taking my ball, going home,

6:45

I will watch the news again

6:48

when this is no longer the

6:50

case that our United States of

6:52

America is being run by oligarchs

6:54

and proxy. Well,

6:57

I'm going to talk a

6:59

little bit about what has

7:01

been going on for me,

7:03

which is I am really

7:05

grateful for the really hard

7:07

personal time I've had, basically

7:09

since Biden's inauguration. I remember

7:11

January 6 really well, because

7:13

it was one of the

7:16

last weeks I was with

7:18

my ex-husband, and we were

7:20

both watching, and I was

7:22

distraught. You know, I was

7:24

like, this is the first

7:26

time since a war. I

7:28

mean, we all know. It

7:30

was a coup, right, attempted

7:32

coup. And my ex-husband was

7:34

like, this is crazy, which

7:37

did not seem like a

7:39

response that would be useful

7:41

in engineering. resistance to what

7:43

happened. He was kind of

7:45

focused on the spectacle of

7:47

it and you know that's

7:49

easy. Maybe deep underneath he

7:51

was just spectacles and eat

7:53

the easier thing to process.

7:55

And then, you know, my

7:58

marriage fell apart. I had

8:00

a bunch of mental health

8:02

stuff, a bunch of personal

8:04

stuff. And in some ways,

8:06

I think that's really prepared

8:08

me for this moment. You

8:10

know, I was pretty upset

8:12

at first. You know, I

8:14

already had some stuff in

8:16

my life that included doing

8:19

service. The day after the

8:21

election, I had intentionally scheduled

8:23

a volunteer slot. the

8:26

person who partners with me in that

8:28

slot is a Trump supporter. And we

8:30

had a lot of discussions leading up

8:33

to the election. I beat him there

8:35

and was doing stuff. He came in,

8:37

was like, so, what do you think

8:40

of the election? How are you doing?

8:42

And I turned to him and was

8:44

like, I'm going to punch you in

8:46

the throat. It was the angriest I've

8:49

ever been, and he backed down. Not

8:52

in a way that gives me hope

8:54

for Trump people backing down, but he

8:56

realized like in our relationship, like not

8:58

good. Don't do that. And

9:00

that was nice. And then we both started

9:02

talking about how we need to raise more

9:05

money. And then I've done a couple other

9:07

things, including, you know, I was already taking,

9:09

I've talked about the free fridge before, and

9:11

I took some stuff there, and on Thanksgiving

9:13

Day, I had a leak come up under

9:15

the floorboards of my house, and one of

9:18

the thoughts I had was the tariffs are

9:20

going to make it really expensive to fix.

9:23

And I took Thanksgiving leftovers to the free fridge

9:25

and there was a couple standing there looking for

9:28

Thanksgiving dinner and the guy was carrying a banjo.

9:30

They took my leftovers and that's been really good

9:32

to focus on because if I focus on the

9:34

other stuff it's going to just tear me up.

9:37

And it already tears me up sometimes. Sounds like

9:39

you kind of answered the question but you sort

9:41

of sharing those stories made me think I'm having

9:43

a struggle. You mentioned resistance and how is this

9:46

helpful just sort of like wow this is crazy

9:48

I don't know if I'm there maybe closest to

9:50

that but I'm definitely apathetic it's like

9:52

you've put, by force or

9:54

by choice, work things into

9:57

work to sort of

9:59

move apathy towards of a better word.

10:01

Well, of a better word.

10:03

I things I can do,

10:06

I when I think logically

10:08

about it, none of

10:10

those things are gonna make

10:12

a huge difference. right, huge

10:15

but it makes me feel

10:17

less powerless. Like doing the the Thanksgiving

10:20

dinner thing was actually actually

10:22

know, because it was because it

10:24

I handed them some Tupperware

10:26

boxes. and

10:28

pie and you know whole trimmings and I was like all right two people

10:30

in the I was like, all right, two

10:32

people in the world are gonna be

10:34

less sad today, I hope. way And

10:36

I don't say all this stuff, by

10:39

the way, it's not and like doing the

10:41

right thing. like, because I think people

10:43

forget how easy it is. It doesn't

10:45

take a ton of time. a week I hours

10:47

a week, I run the shift and

10:49

then takes the amount of time it food thing takes

10:51

the amount of time it takes to

10:53

put stuff into Tupperware, which and do blocks

10:55

two blocks from my house. Get

11:00

the full story and

11:02

so much more at patreon

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.com/honor Cox. Join the community

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today. today. I

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did consider Barnea a friend,

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and he's still a friend to

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The idea of that I want to

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live up to. who you know,

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