Episode Transcript
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0:01
Hey, it's me Paige DeSorbo, and I'm
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right now at your DS store
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or dsw.com. Hi
0:33
everyone, my name is Tyler Oakley
0:35
and you are listening to
0:37
Psychobabble, an unfiltered half hour of
0:39
gossip sessions, pop culture scrutiny,
0:41
and stories we've never told in
0:43
videos. It's not just crazy
0:45
talk, it's Psychobabble. This week we
0:48
discuss Harry Styles' red booty
0:50
shorts in Berlin, Peppa Pig's
0:52
mom getting pregnant for $5
0:54
,000, Corey naming other
0:56
people's dogs at the dog park,
0:58
and why you shouldn't keep your
1:00
cups face down ass up in
1:02
the cupboard. Subscribe
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1:11
If you're not on our
1:13
Discord, you're only getting half
1:15
the babble. Well,
1:30
well America's not the world
1:32
get that through your
1:34
stupid little thick brain. It's
1:36
my world Okay, that's
1:38
where I am Me too
1:40
Yeah, I'm here in
1:42
America. Can you
1:44
believe it? I can
1:46
I can see
1:48
your background. I know
1:50
where you are Another
1:53
beautiful day
1:55
in America. Hey,
1:57
Trump's selling
1:59
Trump 2028 hats on his
2:01
website. It's a good sign. Things
2:04
are going well in America. Don't
2:06
worry everybody. Don't worry everybody. That
2:09
sounds great. You
2:11
think he's going to live that long? One
2:14
can hope. What
2:18
do you what are you
2:20
hoping for? What's the
2:22
one legally I can't say
2:24
what I'm hoping for
2:27
I for one love
2:29
and support all of
2:31
our oligarchy overlords, so
2:33
you know it's
2:35
good whatever happens
2:37
praise be and
2:39
and Allegiance pledged. Oh
2:41
when we were pledging
2:44
allegiance That was crazy of us.
2:46
They were having little five -year -olds
2:48
pledge allegiance to a flag. Girl.
2:51
Girl. Girl.
2:54
I don't stop it. I don't see these 2028
2:57
hats. Did you get
2:59
fake newsed? No,
3:02
I saw it on Pop Crave. They
3:07
said it's a joke. They said
3:09
it's a joke. But everything has
3:11
been a joke. The
3:14
nomination was a joke. The candidacy
3:16
was a joke. It's all been
3:18
a joke until it wasn't. His
3:20
merch is, oh my
3:22
God, he has a merch hat
3:24
that's a white hat with a
3:26
red MAGA hat on the white
3:28
hat. Did you get it? The
3:31
hat on the hat. It's a hat. It's a picture of a
3:33
red hat on the way. Who wears a hat on a hat? It's
3:36
giving wig under wig. Roxie
3:40
Andrews tee. Well, he sells
3:42
Gulf of America shirts. There's
3:44
a picture of him kissing
3:46
a flag. Enough.
3:49
He made the camo hat
3:51
that they made fun of
3:53
Walls and Kamala for making. Yeah,
4:00
they got a little bit
4:02
of everything Thanks great wonderful.
4:04
Yeah, that's my official review
4:06
Okay, so what'd you buy?
4:08
Nothing. Nothing. I can't afford
4:10
it. I can't afford it.
4:12
I'm not a woman. I
4:14
can't get $5 ,000 for giving
4:16
birth Okay, yeah, but you
4:19
usually you can give plasma
4:21
and you can give cum
4:24
That's true, but haven't you seen all
4:26
the haven't you seen all the
4:28
it's been a big year for come
4:30
influencers saying saying I'm mad that
4:32
I donated sperm and now I have
4:34
80 children. Oh
4:37
My god, it could happen
4:39
to you. I Well as somebody
4:41
who's so fertile. I just
4:43
feel like it could happen to
4:45
me. I'm I'm hoarding hoarding
4:47
what? Either come
4:49
our children. I don't well Are
4:52
come children? I don't know.
4:55
No, they're not. Let me
4:57
have. OK, so recently I
4:59
rewatched Look Who's Talking Now's opening
5:01
sequence. Have you ever seen
5:03
it? It's the sperm and it's
5:06
like voiceover sperm swimming toward
5:08
an egg. Yeah. And
5:10
they're all get out of here. Scram. It's
5:12
my turn. I'm going to do it. Yeah. Yeah,
5:15
yeah, it's it's I how old
5:18
was I watching that that was
5:20
like probably the I saw most
5:22
in the theater No, you did
5:24
not my dad took me to
5:26
see it in the theater That
5:28
shit was crazy. I was way
5:30
too young but but I guess
5:33
you know sex ed is important
5:35
Which I don't know which one
5:37
came out first look who's talking
5:40
Yeah, well, you can't look
5:42
who's talking now unless you
5:44
look who's talking. Which one
5:46
has the sperm scene? Regular
5:48
or now? Is
5:50
it now with dogs? There
5:53
are dogs involved, but there's also one
5:56
where there's like, maybe there's
5:58
a little sibling. Look
6:00
who's talking. Look who
6:02
keeps on talking. This is,
6:04
I need to go to the look
6:06
who's talking cinematic universe webpage. Oh
6:09
my God, I just found
6:11
myself on the Peppa Pig Family
6:13
Tree webpage. And
6:15
let me just say that
6:17
family is crazy. You got
6:20
Grandma Pig. Well,
6:22
sorry, Granny Pig. You got
6:24
Grandpa Pig. They had
6:26
Mummy Pig. Mummy Pig
6:28
got together with Daddy Pig.
6:31
They had Peppa Pig and George
6:33
Pig. And did you know
6:35
Mummy Pig is pregnant right now?
6:37
Permanently. No, she
6:39
wants the $5 ,000
6:41
baby boom package that's
6:43
offered by the Trump Vance
6:45
campaign Yeah, well it
6:47
it was dangled in
6:49
front of her a
6:51
little pig snout and
6:53
she went And she
6:55
took she took the loads
6:58
from Daddy Pig Ma
7:00
'am I
7:02
want to know. I want to
7:04
know if you're getting the $5
7:06
,000 for having a baby from
7:08
Trump in advance, do you get
7:10
it as soon as you pee
7:13
on the stick? Well,
7:15
that is when they think a
7:17
baby is my point, ladies. Look.
7:20
Let's get this 5k
7:22
deposited, right when Peppa
7:24
Pig's, when Daddy Pig's load
7:26
is in me, that
7:28
5k better hit the direct
7:31
deposit. When he direct deposits,
7:33
he direct deposits. You know
7:35
what I'm saying? Who's family
7:37
tree is more confusing? The
7:39
Duggars or the pigs? The
7:42
Duggars for sure. The Peppa
7:44
Pig family tree is not
7:46
so confusing. Like the only
7:49
side track that we have
7:51
in the whole family tree is
7:53
Daddy Pig has a brother named
7:55
Uncle Pig. Well, he's not Uncle
7:57
Pig to anybody except Peppa Pig
7:59
and George Pig. But Peppa
8:01
Pig is the star. I don't understand why you're so confused.
8:03
You said this is a confusing family
8:05
tree. So far, everyone's named Grandma,
8:07
Grandpa, Mom, Dad and Uncle. How are
8:10
you confused? Well,
8:12
here's here's my problem with
8:14
it. Once you kill off Peppa
8:16
Pig. And I will. This
8:18
little piggy went to Marquette. Who
8:21
are these pigs without their
8:23
relation to Peppa? Because everyone's
8:25
name is Mummy, Daddy,
8:28
Uncle, Auntie, Granny, Grandpa. These aren't
8:31
names. These are relations to
8:33
Peppa. Some people
8:35
just go by Granny and Uncle. No,
8:39
not some. Mummy doesn't call
8:41
Granny, Granny. Mummy
8:43
calls granny something else certain.
8:45
You don't know that those aren't
8:47
their names. I'm sorry. I'm
8:50
sorry. You don't know if those
8:52
are their names. You just
8:54
don't. Well, Peppa has a cousin
8:56
named Chloe Pig. Wow.
8:59
Don't we all? I feel
9:01
so. No, you have a
9:03
dog niece named Chloe Pig.
9:06
I do. I do. No, I
9:08
think that's my... my brother
9:11
or my sister or something. That
9:13
dog's my sister, technically. If
9:16
I had a dime for every sister,
9:18
that was a dog. If
9:21
I had a dime for every dog,
9:23
that was a sister. Yeah. Yeah.
9:26
Great. I went to
9:28
the dog park yesterday. It's
9:30
fun just to name other people's dogs. OK,
9:33
you're about to piss me off. Because
9:36
you know I have a strict if you
9:38
don't have a dog don't come in the dog
9:40
park rule. This is a park This is
9:42
not what is this is not what you have
9:44
when you said it when you when you
9:46
said it's a dog park Do you mean a
9:48
dog park or do you mean a park?
9:50
It's a park that a lot of people have
9:52
taken over an area that they claim is
9:54
specific for dogs But it's not fenced in in
9:57
any capacity. Okay. Okay. You're allowed
9:59
in then. Thank you I'm
10:01
sorry, but if you come to
10:03
the dog park and go in the
10:05
fenced in area Go in the
10:07
fenced in area without a dog as
10:10
if it's some type of like
10:12
petting zoo Get the hell out you're
10:14
you're tempting fate and the only
10:16
the only individual that's going to be
10:18
harmed by you being there is
10:20
my dog Because you're putting it in
10:22
danger of it reacting to somebody
10:25
who doesn't belong in there and it's
10:27
gonna get in trouble because of
10:29
your Nonsense. Get out. Don't pet
10:31
my dog. Isn't your dog more likely
10:33
to attack another dog than just a person
10:35
sitting watching? Or what do
10:37
these people do? Are they wandering around?
10:39
Are they bending and petting? Bending
10:42
and petting. The girls are
10:44
bending and petting. I saw a
10:46
woman yesterday sit down in
10:48
the dog park. I wanted to
10:51
be like, do you know
10:53
all the piss that is soaking
10:55
into your pants? What's that?
10:57
What's that ground? made
10:59
of turf mama. Is
11:02
it turf? Turf
11:04
mama. You call it
11:06
pitle. Pitle?
11:09
Oh, he pitled in the
11:11
turf. No.
11:14
No, that's piss. Some people say
11:16
pitle mama. Pitle
11:19
mama? Yes.
11:21
No, piss mama. Peppa
11:23
Pig, pitle mama. Well,
11:26
Mummy Pig is a Peppa Pig
11:28
piss. I was like, is it? Peppa
11:30
Pig. It's Mummy, first of all. Mummy
11:33
Pig, a piddle?
11:35
No, Daddy Pig piddled his
11:37
piss into Mummy Pig. So anyways,
11:39
this is just a normal park.
11:41
And even walking down the sidewalk
11:43
might not even know that it's
11:45
a dog park if you go
11:47
at a time when people aren't
11:49
there with dogs. Okay.
11:52
But so we were there. We were
11:54
with dogs. Mind you, I didn't have one.
11:56
I was with people who had dogs. All
11:59
the dogs are running around. So it was
12:01
a fun game to name the other people's
12:03
dogs. And boy, when a lot of people
12:05
finally introduced us to their dogs, did their
12:07
dogs have the wrong name? Okay.
12:09
So what was the dog's name
12:11
and what was the dog supposed
12:13
to be? So there is a
12:16
big old chunk and bulldog sort
12:18
of chunky thick boy, you know?
12:21
Yeah, very cute very multi
12:23
it was giving multicolored it
12:25
was like white, but it
12:27
had like Calico can dogs
12:29
be calico Sure, it was
12:31
giving tank. It was giving
12:33
roller skating dog. What would
12:35
you what would you picture
12:37
this distinguished gentleman to be
12:39
named? um
12:42
Well, do you like human names for
12:44
dogs or do you want it
12:47
to be named like you know like
12:49
I hate I don't I will
12:51
go on the record and say I
12:53
hate human dog human names for
12:55
dogs I've said it before that one
12:57
time I met a dog named
12:59
Rachel and it and I've just never
13:01
recovered Okay, well, so then what
13:03
you want it to be named spot.
13:05
No like chunk or like I
13:07
mean, I guess Brutus would work in
13:09
this instance, but like nobody these
13:11
days nowadays. No one's named Brutus. No
13:13
offense if you're listening Brutus. Okay.
13:18
Um, I
13:20
don't know. Some somebody introduced their dog the
13:22
other day at the dog park as Aristotle. And
13:24
I wanted to be like, shut the fuck
13:26
up. Right. Just
13:29
kind of relax a little. Right. But
13:32
then again, I had to be like in
13:34
here's Cruton. Well,
13:37
this woman came over because her doodle
13:39
kept like her doodle loved me and
13:41
he kept coming in like walking. But
13:43
wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
13:45
wait. Don't try to tell me about
13:47
a doodle when I'm thinking about Brutus
13:49
Maximus over here. You want to know
13:51
what his name was? Yes.
13:54
Yoshi. I thought, yeah,
13:56
fucking right. That's
13:58
so incorrect. I thought you
14:00
look nothing like a Yoshi. I'm sorry
14:02
your owner did that to you.
14:05
Yoshi. OK. Maybe it was
14:07
the pronunciation. Maybe it's, you know,
14:09
a silent J. Like, truly, their name
14:11
was Joshua. No, no, no. The
14:13
owner came over and said, Yoshi, stop
14:15
eating the dirt. Yoshi's
14:18
short for Joshua. So then
14:20
there I was, and this
14:22
woman had this very demure, very
14:24
mindful, very peaceful, beautiful
14:26
white doodle, and it had
14:28
bangs and like a
14:30
little mohawk. It looks sassy.
14:33
And he kept walking between my legs, like
14:35
just standing between my leg, coming up behind
14:37
me and standing between my legs. And so
14:39
I was petting him and being nice. And
14:41
I was like, who's dog is this? And
14:43
finally this old woman came out of nowhere
14:45
and she was all, thank you for being
14:47
kind to my dog. And
14:49
I was all, what was the other
14:52
option? A
14:54
nice punt. Are there people mean to her
14:56
dog? It made me really sad. Okay,
14:59
what's the dog's name? The doodle? Well,
15:01
the doodle's name was Hector. And
15:03
to be fair, I thought it was a woman
15:05
at first. I thought it was a woman dog. Okay.
15:09
Hector, the bangs in the mohawk was giving
15:11
Hector a little woman dog look. Bangs
15:14
and a mohawk? Yeah. Pick a struggle.
15:16
No, it was a good look. I wanted
15:18
to hair tie. I wanted to high
15:20
side pony Hector. That's
15:24
illegal in 30 states. Wow. He was
15:26
cute. So anyways there I was at
15:28
the dog park. Oh Someone had a
15:30
dog just run around humping everyone's dog.
15:32
We were looking around being it being
15:34
like it's nothing wrong with that Well,
15:37
there's nothing wrong with that no listen.
15:39
Let's let the dogs hump. Let's just
15:41
playing I hate when people at the
15:43
dog park are like freaking out about
15:45
any dog humping any dog their dog
15:47
It's like they're not trying to get
15:49
the 5k from Trump. They're just playing.
15:51
They're just trying to initiate play. OK,
15:53
well, can I tell you if you
15:55
liked this or didn't like this? I
15:59
guess you can tell me if I
16:01
liked this or didn't like this. Sure. So
16:03
there it is, this little dog. It's
16:05
actually it looked like a Chloe, but
16:08
it was black and gray. So
16:10
there's Chloe running around, no
16:12
owner in sight. Going up
16:14
to dogs sniffing starting to play start
16:16
humping and then the other dogs
16:18
are like okay knock it off And
16:20
then this little bitch is it
16:22
is fighting and then she's fighting. He's
16:24
all if you're not gonna let
16:27
me hump. I'm gonna fight Well, that's
16:29
life, baby And we saw like
16:31
multiple people have to pick their dog
16:33
up and walk away and we're
16:35
all looking like who owns that little
16:37
Chloe I Don't know to this
16:39
day Some
16:41
people just kind of drop their dog
16:43
off and don't really pay attention. What
16:46
a blessing it must be to have
16:48
a dog like that. I have to keep
16:50
my eye on Cruton at all times.
16:52
At any moment, anything can go crazy. Well,
16:54
he's a Puerto Rican poppy. Used to
16:56
be a deacon. Used to be a deacon.
17:00
I know that's right. Well, he is Puerto
17:02
Rican. I sometimes try
17:04
to speak Espanol. Un
17:06
poco. To crouton. Um, specifically?
17:08
It doesn't... Yes. Yeah,
17:10
well, yes. Yes. Mi
17:13
hentai. I do try to,
17:15
you know, the
17:17
mother tongue, but
17:19
it doesn't really, it doesn't really hit him
17:21
in a way that, or he ignores me.
17:24
A lot, a lot is possible. Well, no
17:26
is the same in both languages. See,
17:29
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19:01
on select items only. Did
19:08
you do anything fun this weekend? I
19:11
went to the antique outlet
19:13
place. Did you get what
19:15
you get? It's no outlet.
19:17
Would you do fart? I'll
19:19
give I'll give you were
19:21
you? Crop Dustin at the
19:23
antique show So there is
19:25
this I didn't get an
19:27
answer Let me get to
19:29
it. There is this place
19:31
called King Richards I
19:33
think King Richard's antique something and I
19:35
don't know check check the gifts I
19:37
send you in Pokemon Go it'll say
19:39
where it was. Whittier. Whittier.
19:42
You ever been to Whittier? I've heard
19:44
about it. Is that where
19:46
Cache Creek Casino is? I
19:49
don't know. They've got a Raising
19:51
Canes. That's all I know. And?
19:54
Well there I was. Cryer I
19:56
was. Crop Dustin and Whittier. Hell
19:58
yeah. It's got three floors. It's
20:00
like a huge, huge, huge, huge,
20:02
huge, huge experience because like... every
20:04
section is like a little booth
20:06
that people can decorate and make
20:08
themes You know for their little
20:10
booth of what's on sale. They're
20:12
not there to sell their stuff.
20:14
So it's like it's nice It's
20:16
like you can wander through booths.
20:18
Everything is labeled and marked and
20:20
priced and you can just take
20:22
anything from any booth into your
20:24
basket and take it up to
20:26
the register and you know, they
20:28
You don't have people hovering over
20:30
you at their booths like it's
20:32
a flea market or something It's
20:34
like you can really just peruse
20:36
be with the fleas. And
20:39
I was perusing. I
20:41
found four new sets of
20:43
salt and pepper shakers to add
20:45
to my collection. You bought
20:47
all four. Yes,
20:50
I did. Yes, I did.
20:52
They were they were
20:54
appropriately priced. I
20:56
got let's see, I got an
20:58
eggplant set. I got
21:00
this little ceramic set that's Like
21:02
the salt is a man and the pepper is
21:05
a lawnmower. And so like they kind of go
21:07
together and just push in the lawnmower. That's cute.
21:10
And he's wearing a shirt that says
21:12
born to mow. I'm like,
21:14
okay, girl, relax. And then
21:16
I got a fork and
21:18
a spoon anthropomorphic fork and
21:20
spoon with faces and arms
21:22
and legs. it giving one
21:24
is this? Well, was it
21:26
giving that stupid spoon in
21:28
the toy stories? Yes,
21:30
that's what it kind of looked like. Can I
21:32
need it? Sporky. What was his name? Yes. I
21:35
want to be him. I need to become
21:37
him. I need to do a transformation stat. You
21:39
know I hated that toy story. And
21:42
then I got, what was my
21:44
fourth one? Oh, oh, the cutest
21:46
one. Two little mice, they
21:49
were gendered. One was coded as
21:51
female mouse. How do you know they
21:53
were gendered? Do you flip them
21:55
over? No, she
21:57
was wearing pink. He was wearing
21:59
blue. And what does that mean?
22:02
She had eyelashes. He
22:04
did not. And
22:06
I have eyelashes and I wear
22:09
pink. was serving puts. And
22:12
they. Unlike any
22:14
other salt and pepper shaker set
22:16
I have, they came with a
22:18
little stand that was a block
22:20
of cheese with spaces for their
22:22
feet so you could plop them
22:24
onto the block. Giving Lego. It
22:27
was so cute. And
22:30
so I got all four. It
22:32
was cute despite the gender norms. Were
22:35
they all at the same
22:37
retailer? No,
22:39
they were all at different little
22:41
vendors. Dang. I was really searching
22:43
low and wide and far and
22:46
near and high and you're just
22:48
walking in every booth saying, yeah,
22:50
I got me salt shakers. No,
22:53
there's nobody to ask. You have to search
22:55
for yourself. Well, who's ringing
22:57
you up? Somebody
22:59
at the register. What?
23:03
What do you mean? Have you not
23:05
been paid attention? You can crop
23:07
dust anywhere. There's nobody around except other
23:09
shoppers Oh, and they had oh
23:11
they had a guy in the middle
23:13
of the whole thing acting like
23:15
he runs antique roadshow assessments of people's
23:18
garbage So there was a line
23:20
for him and people were like Tell
23:22
me about the history of this clock
23:24
and and you could tell he was
23:26
he thought he was auditioning for the
23:28
show because he's like really all you
23:30
have to do is be like I'd
23:32
give it ten bucks, but he was
23:34
like Talking about the history. Did you
23:36
get anything appraised? No,
23:38
I didn't I didn't walk
23:41
by and judged I did you
23:43
walk by and thought he
23:45
needs a hobby Well, he found
23:47
his hobby. Yeah, so and
23:49
so we're not bullying Unless
23:51
it's a child. So I got
23:54
my things and my, I
23:56
keep all my salt and pepper shakers
23:58
in my kitchen on a charcuterie board.
24:00
The charcuterie board is full. So I
24:02
don't know what I'm gonna do. I
24:04
don't know. I'm afraid to get shelving
24:06
for these salt and pepper shakers because
24:08
a lot of them are ceramic and
24:10
I live in earthquake central. Okay,
24:13
I don't need a shaking mishap.
24:15
Can't you put a little something
24:17
on the bottom that kind of
24:19
is a gripper? Ooh,
24:21
you're not wrong. I feel like my
24:24
mom used to have a little bit of
24:26
gripper in the cupboards, and so the
24:28
cups wouldn't slide, they'd be on the little
24:30
gripper. Oh my
24:32
God, when I went to Coachella,
24:34
the house I stayed in, all
24:36
the cups were up. Like
24:38
the holes of the cups
24:40
were up. Up? Like
24:44
the cup was up. The
24:46
hole is on the top of
24:48
the cup. All my cups
24:50
are up. So what
24:52
you're telling me is spiders just crawl
24:54
in and out of your cups when you're
24:56
not looking? Well, I don't
24:58
know any spiders that can open
25:00
drawer, open cupboard doors. You
25:02
ever seen an octopus kind of fit through
25:05
a tiny hole? I've been waiting
25:07
all day for you to bring up an octopus,
25:09
so here we go, mama. Have
25:11
you? Okay, but I
25:13
need to turn all your cups upside
25:15
down. Hey, listen to me right now.
25:17
I don't have, I think I would
25:19
if I had a gripper, but my
25:22
shelves are barren. That's
25:24
fine. Desperate
25:26
times, desperate measures. feels dirtier to
25:28
put it up and put it
25:30
mouth side down on the cupboard
25:32
drawer without a gripper. Okay,
25:35
well, it's just kind of like. And my
25:37
cups are glass. Do you put a glass
25:39
cup upside down? Not a
25:41
single cup of mine. You drink out
25:43
of plastic. gripper. No,
25:47
my cups are
25:49
face down, ass
25:51
up. Okay. No
25:53
gripper. Raw
25:55
dog in the cabinet because I'm
25:57
not trying to have cockroaches
25:59
and spiders and ants. I don't
26:01
have bugs in my home.
26:03
I tell them no. See,
26:05
not for you. Oh my
26:08
God. Oh my god. This
26:10
morning, this morning, right in
26:12
front of my front door to my apartment,
26:14
big old coyote. Can you believe it?
26:16
Oh. The crows, the crows
26:18
that hang out by my apartment acting
26:21
crazy. I was like, what is going
26:23
out on there? I went out there,
26:25
big old coyote, all the crows yelling
26:27
at it. Hey,
26:29
that's, I vaguely remember Grace
26:31
Helbig saw a coyote or
26:33
something and she talked about
26:35
how that's an omen. This
26:38
was years ago. So maybe I'm
26:40
remembering incorrectly. Well, I mean coyotes
26:42
live And I know that's right.
26:44
So there I was at a
26:46
restaurant for dinner last night Oh,
26:49
here we go. And the table behind
26:51
me. So the table that I was looking
26:53
at, because I was sitting across from
26:55
another person, the table that I was facing,
26:58
this woman said to her friend, oh, I got
27:00
a book for you to read. And then
27:02
she's reaching in her person. You know I'm nosy
27:04
because I'm a reader. And she pulls out
27:06
a book. And it's one that I read last
27:08
year that I really liked. So I gasp. And
27:11
then she hears me gasp. And
27:14
then I tell the person I'm at dinner
27:16
with, I say, oh, I just love that
27:18
book. She just gave her friend and she
27:20
reads my lips. So then she says to
27:22
her friend, oh, that guy just said he
27:24
also loves this book that I'm giving you.
27:26
So now you get two people saying it's
27:28
great. So then the woman turns around and
27:30
says, oh, I appreciate you
27:32
saying it was great. I
27:34
wouldn't have trusted my friend's opinion without
27:36
you cosigning it. And I
27:38
thought, yes, yes, she was joking.
27:40
I was like, yes, yes, you're welcome.
27:43
And so then we're all
27:45
talking about what the book
27:48
is and it's about an
27:50
octopus. So
27:52
that we're sitting there, so that they
27:54
go back to talking amongst themselves
27:56
and that we're talking at our own
27:58
table, but I'm telling them about
28:00
the octopus book and then out comes
28:03
the waitress with our appetizer. Oh
28:05
no. And do you know what it
28:07
is? No, I know. Octopus.
28:12
So then those women who see
28:14
me talking about how I
28:16
love an octopus book, now I'm
28:18
eating octopus? Girl.
28:22
Can you believe the violence? I
28:24
can believe. I don't want to think
28:26
too much about it though, because like, these
28:30
animals, I...
28:33
I just rewatched our episode
28:35
of Fear Factor on stream yesterday.
28:37
What's it streaming on? I
28:40
spent $2 .99.
28:43
You'll get the email received. Now you own
28:45
it, for real. Yes. I
28:48
bought it on Prime or something, I don't know.
28:50
But I watched it on stream and I kept
28:52
pausing it to give some behind the scenes scoop,
28:54
if you will. But rewatching
28:56
us eat the bugs. You
28:58
ate a bug. Watching
29:01
all the people eat all the
29:03
bugs it was I it made
29:05
me feel Especially after spending all
29:08
this time pausing to explain just
29:10
how much care they gave to
29:12
the snakes I was like damn.
29:14
They really didn't care about these
29:16
bugs even though those are souls
29:18
You don't know that I don't
29:20
know that and and an octopus
29:22
no less an octopus I the
29:25
brain capacity of a Peppa Pig
29:27
and the multiple hearts I believe
29:29
growl I just I don't know.
29:31
I bet I bet it died
29:33
of Nat causes. Nat?
29:37
Oh, it was short for natural. Oh,
29:41
I thought it was short for Nat
29:43
with a G. You
29:45
were wrong. It's Nat.
29:47
Nat. Nat. I hate
29:49
Nat. What the hell is a Nat? So
29:52
then there I was at this other restaurant.
29:54
I went out to eat twice this weekend. Girl,
29:57
the tariffs. And
30:00
this restaurant had a menu, but then it
30:02
was like, what do you call it? They
30:04
all were coming around. You could order from
30:06
the regular menu, but the whole spiel was
30:08
they were all coming around with little carts
30:10
of little things. Love. And they were all,
30:12
do you want one of these? And then
30:14
if you said yes, there was a little
30:16
check sheet on your table and they would
30:18
mark it off and you would pay at
30:20
the end. So it was
30:22
giving you on a little of this, you
30:24
on a little of that. So you really
30:26
had a few waiters and waitresses. Yes.
30:31
I'm raising my hand. I'm
30:33
polite to interrupt. Thank you. Um,
30:36
is that where a la
30:38
carte comes from? Probably. But the
30:40
restaurant wasn't called a la
30:42
carte. I know.
30:44
But like the for is that's that's a
30:46
phrase, right? A la carte. Yes, a
30:48
la carte. Okay.
30:51
So, would you get a la carte? So
30:53
there we are. And so then
30:55
this gay waiter comes over and we
30:57
knew he was gay. He was
30:59
giving gay. He was giving the people
31:01
know I'm gay and I'm gay. And
31:04
so he comes over and he's all,
31:06
I feel like I can, while he's got
31:09
his little meatball cart, he's all, I
31:11
feel like you're a table I can
31:13
share this story with. And he's
31:15
all, the girl at the
31:17
table over there. I told her, love
31:19
your shoes. And she told me, I
31:21
have a boyfriend. So
31:26
wait, he's in the middle
31:28
of that story and we're
31:31
all laughing. And then
31:33
our actual waitress who's been doing our drinks
31:35
stuff. Oh, you're laughing. She
31:37
comes. Oh, you're laughing. She has
31:39
a boyfriend and you're laughing. So
31:41
the drink waitress comes over and
31:43
she's all. What are y 'all laughing
31:45
about is he vamping? And
31:49
then he's all tells
31:51
her the story and she
31:54
looks at us and
31:56
she goes He tells he
31:58
makes up this story
32:00
every night for every every
32:02
every table And then
32:04
it was kind of awkward
32:07
and then it was
32:09
kind of awkward for all
32:11
involved So you're
32:13
telling me he threw another
32:15
table under the bus? Yes
32:18
As a lie stick
32:20
then he does this it's
32:22
a stick he does
32:24
all the time with gay
32:26
tables to He's vamping
32:28
he's vamping he's he's he's
32:30
creating a little bit
32:32
of Rapport he for the
32:34
tippage he was he
32:36
was offended she she was
32:38
all again And
32:41
he was all, no, it really happened. And she
32:43
was all, oh, this happens quite a bit to
32:45
you. Girl.
32:47
Well, maybe he's always vamping
32:49
with the straight women telling him
32:51
he loves their shoes, despite
32:53
not loving their shoes. I don't
32:55
know. Maybe he put on
32:57
his straight drag and pretended so
33:00
he could set up the
33:02
whole story. I don't know. It
33:04
was awkward. It was like mom and dad
33:06
fighting. And I was like, can we just pay
33:08
for our meatball? Ooh,
33:11
were they fennel? Oh my god, babe.
33:14
No, they weren't. The meatballs were incredible.
33:17
I don't like fennel in the meatball. Ooh,
33:19
it was good. I would go back. I
33:21
would go back and order less from the
33:23
menu and more from the little carts they
33:25
push around. Although,
33:28
well, she's now I've been to two
33:30
restaurants in the last month and
33:33
they're very big into selling. Well, I
33:35
think it's sister restaurants on their
33:37
dessert menu. They have a peanut shot,
33:39
non -alcoholic. And they're
33:41
all, you gotta try this peanut
33:43
juice. That's
33:46
a no for me dog. And then they bring
33:48
out a brown liquid in the shot glass and it's
33:50
supposed to be a dessert and it's peanut milk.
33:52
But you know what it tastes like? Cereal
33:55
milk. You know milk at the end of
33:57
a cereal? Yes.
33:59
It's giving that. I
34:01
like that. I don't know if I would order
34:03
it. We got it for free because one of
34:05
our meals took too long. We didn't ask they
34:07
offered. That's nice.
34:10
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35:13
that's all my stories for
35:15
the weekend me eating out You
35:17
ever died I've been doing
35:19
it. I've been doing it little
35:22
mama All I had to
35:24
discuss was Harry Styles and his
35:26
red booty shorts spotted in
35:28
Berlin. I didn't see him. Why
35:30
don't you link me? Girl
35:33
just google.com it Harry he's in
35:36
his booty. He's he's in these red
35:38
booty shorts You don't even see
35:40
his face. He said he's at the
35:42
like, you know the counter at
35:44
the hotel and Everyone's quote tweeting it
35:46
being like oh Benson boom better
35:48
be shaken. He's he's coming back mama.
35:51
I You know, I was
35:53
thinking Benson Boone is
35:55
is swerving a little into
35:57
that lane Swerving into
35:59
he the car in the lane.
36:01
He reheated his nachos He
36:04
jumps started as his vehicle.
36:08
I like how his hips popped
36:10
out in this picture, mama. He's
36:13
got a little, he's got a
36:15
little. Oh, he's got a little.
36:18
He's got a little sugar in his tank.
36:21
Watermelon sugar. If he told
36:23
the girls he liked their shoes, they
36:26
wouldn't tell him they had a boyfriend. Okay,
36:30
sure Yes, we didn't discuss the
36:32
drag race all -stars 10 casting
36:34
should we do it next week?
36:36
Here's what I have to say
36:38
No save it for next here's
36:40
what I have to say Okay,
36:42
okay, we can wait Let I
36:44
mean baby. Let's save it. Let's
36:46
save it. When does it premiere
36:48
not this Friday, but next Friday?
36:50
I believe or two Fridays the
36:52
14th or some shit We've
36:54
got time and there there may be
36:56
many updates before then so we'll discuss it
36:58
next week And I certainly will have
37:00
a meet the Queens by then I need
37:02
to meet who these Queens are. It's
37:04
already aired you fool. Oh
37:07
You fool. Okay Well, I
37:09
need to I need to
37:11
meet them. I haven't met
37:13
them. All right All right,
37:15
Cory. Where can people find
37:17
you? You can find me
37:19
eating out dining in hittlin
37:21
on the floor Okay.
37:26
You can find
37:28
me artificially inseminating
37:30
my pigs for
37:32
$5 ,000. Great.
37:35
Love that for you. Bye.
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