0:00

This is This is a message

0:02

from sponsor into it TurboTax.

0:04

Taxes was getting frustrated by

0:06

your forms. Now, taxes is

0:08

uploading your forms with a

0:10

snap and a TurboTax expert

0:12

will do your taxes for

0:14

you. One who's backed by

0:16

the latest tech, which crosschecks

0:18

millions of data points for

0:21

absolute accuracy. All of which

0:23

makes it easy for you

0:25

to get the most money

0:27

back, guaranteed. Get an expert

0:29

now at turbotax.com/guarantees. Hi, this

0:31

is Javon your blinds.com design

0:33

consultant. Oh wow, a real person. Yep, I'm here

0:35

to help with everything from

0:37

selecting the perfect window treatments

0:39

to... Well, I've got a complicated

0:42

project. No problem. I can even help

0:44

schedule a professional measure and install.

0:46

We can also send your samples fast

0:48

and free. Hmm, I just might have to

0:50

do more. Whatever you need. So the

0:52

first room we're looking at is for...

0:54

Shop blinds.com now and save up to

0:56

45% on Select Styles. Blinds and restrictions

0:59

may apply. This

1:01

episode This episode is brought to you

1:03

by LifeLock. It's tax season, and we're

1:05

all a bit tired of numbers, but here's

1:07

one you need to hear, $16

1:09

.5 billion. That's how much

1:11

the IRS flagged for possible

1:13

identity fraud last year. Now

1:15

here's a good number, 100

1:17

million. That's how many data

1:19

points LifeLock monitors every second.

1:21

If your identity is stolen,

1:23

they'll fix it, guaranteed. Save

1:25

up to 40 % your first

1:27

year at lifelock.com/podcast. Terms apply.

1:30

We have been married now for

1:32

going on. And today, indeed, we

1:35

are talking about relationship

1:37

advice. First, some, this little

1:39

pretext here. Okay. The prologue.

1:41

Okay. We have been married

1:43

now. And today, indeed, we

1:46

are talking about relationship, um,

1:48

advice. First, some, this little

1:50

pretext here. Okay. A prologue. We

1:52

have been married now for going

1:55

on a million years. I

1:57

think where this will be our 13th

1:59

year. Uh, 12th, 12th. No, because it's

2:01

25. Oh, yeah, 12th. Yeah, 12th. Yeah.

2:03

So yeah, it's pretty sick. Feels like

2:06

13th. All right. Wow. She's kidding. So

2:08

don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't read

2:10

too deep into that, please. Please read

2:12

all the subjects. Help me. So yeah,

2:14

that's our goal is to hopefully help.

2:16

But you guys navigate. successful relationships. And

2:19

maybe you're like, I don't have a

2:21

relationship yet, Sebring. Yeah, but that's not

2:23

what this is about. This is about

2:25

like being ready for your first mature

2:27

relationship. If you want one. Which we

2:30

highly recommend. We both really recommend. We

2:32

think it's pretty sick. We think it's

2:34

sick as a. I think that the

2:36

right relationship, the like the healthy relationship.

2:38

it will just enhance your life. A

2:40

lot of people think that like, oh,

2:43

what the old ball and trade, like

2:45

what you get in a relationship, you

2:47

know, you gotta like sacrifice and all

2:49

this stuff. It really doesn't have to

2:51

be like that. Like you just find

2:54

a partner that like enhances everything that

2:56

you love about your life. As long

2:58

as they fit you right. And so

3:00

today we are indeed trying to help

3:02

other people fit it right. And he

3:04

fits me pretty right. Oh, it's a

3:07

tight fit. This first one is I-28

3:09

female rejected my husband 33 male for

3:11

the first time and his reaction grossed

3:13

me out. Oh no. My husband and

3:15

I are trying to spice up our

3:17

S-life. I am the one actively trying,

3:20

he's just along for the right, she

3:22

says in parentheses. We can't say sex?

3:24

I don't know man. Okay. We're just

3:26

being good boys and girls. I guess.

3:28

We were watching a racy movie. Ooh,

3:31

what do you think, what movie you

3:33

think it was? Like a type of...

3:35

I spy. I spy. Oh yeah, man.

3:37

Probably like a real estate show. Oh

3:39

yeah, real estate shows. And I asked

3:41

him if we can choose two toys

3:44

out of our collection tonight. He gave

3:46

me a do we have to kind

3:48

of reaction and made a vibrator joke.

3:50

We went to the bedroom. I pulled.

3:52

the box of toys and he chose

3:55

the wand and I asked him if

3:57

he can choose another but he said

3:59

no because it feels like pulling teeth

4:01

to try to get him to be

4:03

proactive in our S life it upset

4:05

me enough that I told him I

4:08

don't want to do it anymore it's

4:10

the first time I've ever rejected him

4:12

whereas he probably rejects me at least

4:14

several times a month he demanded I

4:16

come back to bed or he was

4:19

going to get really pissed I think

4:21

that reaction is insane I tried to

4:23

communicate how I feel like we can

4:25

go about our our S life makes

4:27

me feel unsexy and undesired. He refused

4:29

to communicate with me and now I'm

4:32

sleeping on the couch. What? We're already

4:34

going to couples counseling. What the hell

4:36

am I supposed to do? Huh. This

4:38

is tricky because they're married. Yeah, no,

4:40

exactly. Because if they weren't, I would

4:42

say that you guys aren't, this isn't

4:45

going to work out. It just doesn't,

4:47

I don't understand how he can have

4:49

that kind of reaction when he's the

4:51

one rejecting her most of the time.

4:53

Right. Yeah, I don't

4:56

get it like or he was gonna

4:58

get really pissed get back here I'm

5:00

gonna get real pissed Yeah, okay that

5:02

turns me on it doesn't work, but

5:04

exactly you can't demand many guys do

5:07

this whiny thing and it doesn't turn

5:09

chicks on at all And I really

5:11

yeah think that this should be like

5:13

underlined and put it in Boston like

5:16

put on the wall They're already going

5:18

to be wants to screw a whiny

5:20

boy that's true Like when you whine

5:22

about not having sex or like, like

5:24

if I'm not, if someone's not in

5:27

the mood and then the other person

5:29

wines about it. Well, why? Yeah. Oh,

5:31

that makes it worse. Yeah. You're just

5:33

adding dirt to your grade and then

5:35

the revenge cycle of like, well, next

5:38

time I'm not going to, um, yeah,

5:40

I'll give you the quiet treatment. Yeah,

5:42

that's so weird. It's like you're in

5:44

a high school relationship instead of in

5:46

a mature relationship. Don't, please don't do

5:49

that to your partners. if anything it

5:51

pushes them further and further and further

5:53

away. So I'm I guess it's hard

5:55

to tell by like what their relationship

5:57

was like by this snapshot because like

6:00

they're already going to. couples counseling so

6:02

there's already stuff that's wrong underlying things

6:04

that are wrong. Yes, underlying things

6:06

that are causing resentment or friction

6:09

in the relationship. Yes, well I think

6:11

she is more interested in spicing up

6:13

their sex life, right? Yeah. She says

6:15

in an edit later on, because you

6:17

know how whenever a post blows up

6:19

on Reddit people go, wow, thank you

6:21

read it. Wow, a lot of responses. Oh wow,

6:23

thank you. I'm the famous person. Right.

6:25

So they said, she says, there was

6:27

no point where I was forcing him

6:29

to do something he didn't want to

6:31

do. We got the toys as part

6:34

of a compromise for the lack of

6:36

effort he puts into our sex life.

6:38

For example, I asked him to blindfold

6:40

me for five years. He doesn't say

6:42

no. He says, do I have to.

6:44

I have to. I've had conversation with

6:46

him about. about how remarks like that kill

6:48

the mood and then he tells me he

6:50

wants to try more kinky stuff but when

6:53

it actually he's actually in the moment he'll

6:55

sigh and act like it's a choice he

6:57

likes the idea of it yeah he likes

7:00

talking about it doesn't get it I mean it

7:02

is kind of just a lot of effort like

7:04

to do kinky stuff it's like a lot of

7:06

Well, especially to certain people, it

7:08

doesn't really work. Especially when like it's

7:10

later at night and you're just like,

7:12

look, I don't know if I have

7:14

the stamina for even normal shit. Like

7:16

now we got to add like all

7:18

this bondage and blindfolds and stuff. Can't

7:21

be put in knots and stuff. But

7:23

I think that if your relationship is

7:25

in trouble and especially in the passion

7:27

department and you care about it, then it's

7:30

worth the extra effort. Time to get your

7:32

balls tied up, brother. Exactly, that's what

7:34

you always say. So I always say.

7:36

I would honestly just sit down

7:38

and this guy just needs to hear

7:41

that I think he just doesn't

7:43

care about having sex with her. He

7:45

doesn't. So that's a real big problem.

7:48

Yeah. Yeah. I would say that your

7:50

relationship is going downhill and I don't

7:52

think it's it sounds non-salatable.

7:55

No, it doesn't sound like you're

7:57

just like in a grueling endeavor.

7:59

Yeah. Yeah. So that was so that's good

8:01

advice I know kind of I

8:03

mean it's gonna happen if sex

8:05

is important to you then it's

8:07

going to happen like you see

8:10

the same patterns over and over

8:12

and like it's hard to Try

8:14

to it's hard to give advice

8:16

when like you see this is

8:18

a sinking ship. Yes I completely

8:20

agree. Okay. Check this one out.

8:22

Okay. My sister-in-law, 34 female, became

8:24

pregnant weeks after my wife, 36

8:26

female, had a successful embryo implementation.

8:28

And now my wife is furious

8:30

at my 37 male entire side

8:32

of the family. Has anyone ever

8:34

been through this and has advice

8:36

for me? So yeah, they had

8:38

a successful embryo implementation done at

8:40

the end of February and my

8:42

brother let me know about a

8:44

very positive pregnancy test this last

8:46

week after they began trying after

8:48

their wedding this summer. Ever since

8:50

I told my wife she's been

8:52

furious with me, my sister-in-law, and

8:54

my mother, she refuses to have

8:56

a sustained conversation about it, but

8:58

from what she's told me, she's

9:00

really upset that they knew everything

9:02

we had to go through to

9:04

get pregnant and then go get

9:06

pregnant weeks after we did, which

9:08

was supposed to be her moment.

9:10

Oh, I mean, like, they have

9:12

their different things. Separately she is

9:14

mad at me because I did

9:16

not do not seem excited for

9:18

the baby and that I quote

9:20

want the baby to Miss Kerry

9:22

What after I made a comment

9:24

that I was nervous to be

9:26

excited until after the first trimester

9:28

when she asked me how I

9:30

felt about becoming a father So

9:32

it doesn't sound like he wants

9:34

he's scared of it. He's just

9:36

afraid of jinxion anything. She's also

9:38

mad at my mother after she

9:41

told some family members after the

9:43

implementation because we told her not

9:45

to say anything So

9:47

like she told some family members

9:49

about the implementation before anything got

9:51

announced Is it implementation or implantation?

9:53

I think I said it and

9:55

I think it's implantation. Yeah, I

9:57

think it's implantation So she's met

9:59

I don't understand. So it's supposed

10:01

to be her moment. She didn't

10:03

announce it. She didn't announce it.

10:05

And now the other, the sister-in-law

10:07

is getting her announcement first. Yes.

10:09

I see. Yes. Okay. And they

10:11

knew what they were going through

10:13

and why did you steal my

10:15

moment? Yeah, right. Right? Get over

10:17

yourself. I don't even. Get over

10:19

yourself. This moment shit. People just

10:21

need to do more stuff with

10:23

their lives, I think. I agree,

10:25

like, yeah. Because this moment shit

10:27

is like ruining society. And also,

10:29

like, you don't, the sister can't,

10:31

like, decide when to have it.

10:34

It's not like, she, like, decided,

10:36

okay, I'm gonna be pregnant now.

10:38

This isn't her walking out in

10:40

a wedding dress during your wedding.

10:42

Yeah, exactly. This is, like, a

10:44

completely different thing. They've been trying

10:46

since summertime since summertime. I can,

10:48

yeah, see that's February now. There's

10:50

very specific things that a what

10:52

person could do to steal your

10:54

moment, which would be like proposing

10:56

at someone else's wedding, I think

10:58

is such a rude, disrespectful thing.

11:00

Very tacky. Very tacky. Very low

11:02

class. Things like that, like where

11:04

it's an action, but like getting

11:06

pregnant around the same time. I

11:08

mean, if I, if, if you're.

11:10

Let's say your sister was having

11:12

trouble getting pregnant and then she

11:14

finally got pregnant and then we

11:16

got pregnant at the same time

11:18

I would think that she'd be

11:20

like elated that we're like gonna

11:22

go through it together. I know

11:25

that's a normal reaction. Yeah, yeah,

11:27

yeah. No, I think that she

11:29

is a normal chick. This chick

11:31

is an outlier. She's not a

11:33

catty chick is what I mean.

11:35

Like she's not like... Yeah, but

11:37

you think that all that women

11:39

tend to veer more this way?

11:41

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

11:43

all of them, yeah. I don't

11:45

think so. I like don't, I

11:47

think this is like more of

11:49

an outlier. I think it's a

11:51

certain class of women that are

11:53

like, you know what I mean,

11:55

you just... don't have like big

11:57

problems then because like I don't

11:59

understand like you should just be

12:01

thrilled that you have a successful

12:03

implantation like I just don't understand

12:05

the the comparison to someone else's

12:07

path yeah this moment stuff has

12:09

to be rooted out and destroyed

12:11

yeah so my advice to you

12:13

is to tell this person to

12:16

get over themselves I think that

12:18

I'm trying to like play Devils

12:20

advocate in some way, but I

12:22

cannot. The only thing I can

12:24

relate to is like when you

12:26

have an achievement and people are

12:28

just kind of like, you know,

12:30

whatever about it. And it's like,

12:32

whatever, it wasn't a big deal.

12:34

Then someone else in your family

12:36

has the same achievement and it

12:38

like gets celebrated. Right. That's the

12:40

only thing I can think of

12:42

that's like... Yeah, people are making

12:44

a bigger deal about one over

12:46

the other. Yeah, where it's like,

12:48

damn, like I just did that,

12:50

like, and nobody said a word

12:52

about it. Right. But yeah, and

12:54

then, who knows, you know, like,

12:56

but I've learned even through that,

12:58

that just, like, it just doesn't

13:00

matter. Like, who cares in the

13:02

long run? It's just like, like,

13:04

like, you having a baby is

13:06

the most important thing, like, like,

13:09

like, healthy baby, like, healthy baby.

13:11

I try this one off her

13:13

size. Okay. My husband, 29 male,

13:15

and his family disowned his mom

13:17

after her affair. I didn't disown

13:19

her. Oh. Yeah. Now the emotional

13:21

consequences are taking a toll on

13:23

my marriage, need advice. I, 28

13:25

male, have been my husband, 29

13:27

male for seven years, married for

13:29

almost one. This has been a

13:31

genuinely good relationship. I love him

13:33

deeply. We built something I'm proud

13:35

of. I've always felt at home.

13:37

with his. I'm close with his

13:39

youngest brother and his girlfriend, but

13:41

the person I've always felt the

13:43

strongest connection with is his mom.

13:45

A few years back, I went

13:47

through a rough depressive episode. She

13:49

was the only person who truly

13:51

showed up for me. She didn't

13:53

treat me like, quote, her son's

13:55

partner. She treated me like family.

13:57

always loved her for that. I'm

14:00

close with my father-in-law too, but

14:02

with my mother-in-law it always felt

14:04

like more of a friendship. Then

14:06

everything flipped. Just after Christmas my

14:08

father-in-law sat us all down and

14:10

told us that she had been

14:12

having an affair and that it wasn't the

14:14

first time. He said he tried to make

14:16

things work but he couldn't do it anymore.

14:18

He was heartbroken and it shattered the whole

14:20

family. My husband and his brothers were crushed.

14:22

They all cut contact with her and his

14:25

brothers and his brothers. She eating is a betrayal,

14:27

especially after decades of marriage. I'm not trying to excuse

14:29

what she did, but I also couldn't ignore the fact that during one of

14:31

the worst times in my life, she showed me care and kindness when I

14:33

felt like I had no one, and that stayed with me. A few weeks

14:35

ago, she reached like I had no one, and that stayed with me. A

14:37

few weeks ago, she reached out to me, and I had no one, and

14:40

that stayed with me. A few weeks ago, she reached out to me, and

14:42

had no one, and that stayed with me. And that stayed with me. And

14:44

that stayed with me. And that stayed with me. And that stayed with me.

14:46

And that stayed with me. And that stayed with me. And that stayed with

14:48

me. And that stayed with me. And that stayed with me. And that stayed

14:50

with me. And that stayed with me. And that stayed with me. And

14:52

that stayed with me. And that stayed with me. And that stayed with

14:54

me. And that stayed with me. And that I didn't try

14:57

to defend her or fix anything. I just

14:59

tried to be there for her the way

15:01

she once was for me. Later that

15:03

evening, I told my husband about it.

15:05

He completely lost it. He said I

15:07

betrayed him and went behind his back

15:10

and he left the house. The next

15:12

day, I tried to explain where I

15:14

was coming from. I tried to explain

15:16

where I was coming from. I told him

15:18

I wasn't trying to shoot sides. I

15:20

just reacted to someone I cared for.

15:23

and should have respected their

15:25

decision to cut contact.

15:28

Now I feel stuck. I understand

15:30

why they're upset. I didn't

15:32

mean to hurt anyone. Couldn't

15:35

turn my back on someone who

15:37

didn't turn their back on me.

15:39

What do you think? That's a

15:42

tough one. That's a tough one.

15:44

It's a tough one. Yeah, because,

15:46

like, I've been in the position

15:48

before where... Someone was

15:51

there for me during a really

15:53

really really tough time and even

15:55

though later they were being

15:57

unreasonable and of

16:00

like not yeah kind of like not

16:02

a great friend I still felt like

16:04

I I owed them for the times

16:06

that they were there for me right

16:08

and I think that you can kind

16:10

of have blinders on or like get

16:12

into a trap of like oh well

16:14

I don't want to you know not

16:16

be there for them when they were

16:18

there for me but if the person

16:20

isn't like you know Do

16:23

it is I don't know if they're

16:25

trying to take advantage of you then

16:27

I don't know it could be different

16:29

But I'm not saying that that's what

16:31

the mom's doing right I don't know

16:33

you know like I have no idea

16:35

But I just saying that that's a

16:38

certain if your mom cheated on your

16:40

dad. Yeah, and like me and your

16:42

mom are tight Yeah, if everyone asked

16:44

me to cut off contact with your

16:46

mom it'd be very hard know if

16:48

I would even, I wouldn't cut off

16:50

contact for my mom. That's just a

16:52

ridiculous thing. Yeah, what do you think

16:54

about that, like the punishment? You know,

16:56

does that fit the crime? I don't

16:58

know. So it has to, it's like

17:00

so personal. Well, let's just take it

17:02

from the abstract. Yeah, like, let's just

17:04

talk about, no, I mean, like, we

17:06

can't take it from the abstract, but

17:09

like if we're giving relationship advice on

17:11

this husband wife thing, I do. they

17:13

should come to a conclusion like a

17:15

compromise together that they don't cross like

17:17

a boundary yeah if if your boundary

17:19

was that I cut off contact with

17:21

your mom after that one time where

17:23

I help her out and like we

17:25

have coffee and stuff I feel like

17:27

you know like I'm sorry I love

17:29

I love you but I love her

17:31

mom I love your mom yeah but

17:33

like you mean more to me because

17:35

you're my you're my partner so at

17:38

a certain point like I do think

17:40

that there has to be a compromise

17:42

regardless of whether you think it's wrong

17:44

or right for them to don't you

17:46

think that the I think the base

17:48

level should have told your partner that

17:50

you're gonna meet with the mom yeah

17:52

exactly that's just a base level of

17:54

respect yeah and like transparency that I

17:56

think that she just that he wouldn't

17:58

approve? I think so. It's a he.

18:00

These are two dudes. Oh, okay. Yeah,

18:02

yeah. But I think so too. Like

18:04

I think that is a fact, but

18:06

I think it still is like, hey,

18:09

look, I know you're gonna be mad

18:11

about this. I'm gonna go meet your

18:13

mom because one time she helped me.

18:15

Yeah. And that's what's up. Yeah. You

18:17

know what I mean? Yeah. I think

18:19

that would have been good. Sure. And

18:21

then after that, like you said, depending

18:23

on what we agreed to is the

18:25

boundary, I would inform the mom of

18:27

what's going on. Yeah, but don't you

18:29

think like, if he's this, if he's

18:31

taking it this poorly, don't you think

18:33

he would have been like, don't go?

18:35

You can't go? Yeah, I do think

18:38

so. But I would have said, look,

18:40

I'm going because I owe her one.

18:42

So that is more of a betrayal

18:44

in my opinion. You think so? Because

18:46

that's like your partner set the line.

18:49

Like the way that they did it

18:51

right now is like there was no

18:53

line I just think that this is

18:56

a wild thing like it is it's

18:58

very personal and situation just going like

19:00

we're cutting off mom because she's done

19:02

dad we're cutting her off for good

19:05

we're not talking to mom anymore Yeah,

19:07

that's why I can't relate to it.

19:09

Yeah, because like that's their situation. Yeah,

19:12

you know, like If my mom cheated

19:14

on my dad, that's their situation. It

19:16

shouldn't change the relationship I have with

19:19

my mom or my dad. Like I

19:21

would give my, you know, parent shit

19:23

for it. Yeah. For sure. I don't

19:26

know that I would go, like, I'm

19:28

never talking to you, Ian, or whatever.

19:30

Yeah, if I think, exactly, if I

19:32

think, like, wow, my mom really hurt

19:35

my dad, I would have compassion and

19:37

empathy for my dad, and I would,

19:39

like, be kind of mad at my

19:42

mom. Maybe you'd be mad. Yeah. But

19:44

like, it doesn't take away all of

19:46

the nurturing care that, like, there's a

19:49

lot of shitty, have kids and they

19:51

are not having a fun time in

19:53

their relationship, but the partner is a

19:56

really good father or mother. And so

19:58

that is so separate to me that

20:00

as the child, like to cut one

20:02

of your parents off, unless they personally

20:05

did something to you, is just a

20:07

wild concept for me. It's wild. I

20:09

get it because I do try to

20:12

ride for people when they're going through

20:14

something. Yeah. If my dad was like,

20:16

you can't talk to your mother anymore.

20:19

I don't know what I would even

20:21

say. Well that's ridiculous. I know. I'm

20:23

an adult. Like my dad can't tell

20:26

me not to talk to my mom.

20:28

I know. Like that has nothing to

20:30

do with anything. Yeah, I can be

20:32

like, I can be bitter about it

20:35

and be like, man, my mom's so

20:37

selfish, like why'd she do that? I

20:39

could express my feelings, but I'm not

20:42

gonna cut my mom out of my

20:44

life. And that's just me personally. I

20:46

have a really good relationship with my

20:49

mom and her hurting my dad has

20:51

nothing to do with me. You know,

20:53

and that's kind of like, it's kind

20:56

of shitty. But it doesn't mean that

20:58

she would escape the consequences with you.

21:00

at like when someone's doing that like

21:02

there we don't know everything in their

21:05

relationship right like we don't know it's

21:07

not the first time is a wild

21:09

thing it's not the first time so

21:12

like what if the dad's like abusive

21:14

or neglectful or whatever like we don't

21:16

know yeah like we don't know if

21:19

the mom is like found true love

21:21

somewhere else we just we don't know

21:23

not the first time I would say

21:26

probably she didn't Yeah, yeah, I know.

21:28

We can make some assumptions. But like,

21:30

I don't, I don't know. So, first

21:32

of all, I would never, I don't

21:35

think I would ever, I don't think.

21:37

I can't like like like a string

21:39

I don't know but like I don't

21:42

think I would ever cut one of

21:44

my parents out But I could cut

21:46

your dad out easy. Oh for sure

21:49

easy easy easy. I mean he's just

21:51

you know mostly just because his jokes

21:53

are stale very stale. He needs some

21:56

more material and I just can't see

21:58

myself doing that but if If

22:00

I did, and then you met with her,

22:02

I mean, I would feel a little betrayed.

22:05

If that was a line that I

22:07

said, you know. Yeah, it reminds me of

22:09

when I, so I was in a

22:11

relationship one time ago, and I was,

22:13

we broke up and then she wanted

22:15

me back real bad and she'd dumped

22:18

me back real bad and she ended

22:20

up going through my Ma to talk

22:22

to me because I like blocked her

22:25

and shit. And I was like, Ma,

22:27

I love you, you're the best. And

22:29

I get why she's using you

22:31

for this. Exactly. But please don't

22:34

do this to me. That's what I

22:36

feel like. It's kind of like using.

22:38

Like, the mom was there for

22:40

this, for the OP. Yeah. Okay. But now

22:42

in this circumstance, is it

22:45

like, should you kind of using him?

22:47

It could be. It sounds like she's

22:49

literally using him because

22:51

she knew that like her sons. That

22:54

means she brought that up at coffee.

22:56

Her sons won't talk to her. Yeah.

22:58

Yeah. Yeah. Like, could you talk to them for

23:00

me? That's not just two people having

23:02

coffee together. It's true. You know, there

23:04

is a transaction there. Literally a transaction.

23:07

Yeah. Help pay rent. Yeah, exactly.

23:09

Yep. All right, that's a tough one, man. It

23:11

is tough one. It's tough one. It's tough

23:13

because there's two relationships involved.

23:15

Yes. Or multiple relationships

23:17

involved. Because... For me, there's

23:20

a pecking order. You come first.

23:22

So whether I agree with you or

23:24

not, I can try to talk

23:26

some sense into you or help

23:28

you see my point of view

23:30

that you shouldn't maybe cut your

23:32

mom out. But regardless, like at

23:34

the end of the day, if you

23:36

are like, that's my mom and I

23:38

don't want you to talk to her,

23:40

I would respect that over. Like, well,

23:42

no, she was there for me. Like, yeah, but

23:45

so were you. Like, your partner's there for

23:47

you more than anybody. So, if you set

23:49

a line, like, then I wouldn't cross that

23:51

line. That's true. I get, I get, I

23:53

get what you're saying. Yeah. I guess for me,

23:56

I just feel like if I owe somebody something,

23:58

I have to go through with it. have More

24:57

rewards, more savings. With American

24:59

Express Business Gold, earn up

25:01

to $395 back in annual

25:03

statement credits on eligible purchases

25:05

at select shipping, food delivery,

25:07

and retail subscription merchants, including

25:09

the $155 Walmart Plus monthly

25:11

membership credit and $240 flexible

25:13

business credit. Enjoy the benefits

25:15

of membership with the Amex

25:17

Business Gold Card. Terms apply.

25:19

Learn more at American express.com/business-business-gold.

25:22

Amex Business Gold Card, built

25:24

for business by American Express.

25:33

Well, with the name of your

25:35

price tool from Progressive, you can

25:37

find options that fit your budget

25:39

and potentially lower your bills. Try

25:41

it at progressive.com. Progressive Casualty Insurance

25:43

Company and affiliates. Price and coverage

25:46

match limited by state law. Not

25:48

available. Hello

25:52

everyone, I'm your host Alanis and

25:54

you're listening to Notche di Pinde-Háras.

25:56

The podcast where your guests are

25:58

hot. but the cheesement is even

26:00

hotter. I am a content creator

26:03

and beautiful fanatic and no one

26:05

knows how Tucci's mad quite like

26:07

me. Industry drama, secret project, scandals,

26:09

will uncover it all over a

26:11

cocktail and some juicy games. On

26:13

Not to the better hot last,

26:15

I put your favorite influencers in

26:17

the hot seat and ask them

26:19

the questions we're all dying to

26:21

know. You know those topics, influencers

26:23

always seem to be dodging. Well,

26:25

there's nowhere for them to hide

26:27

now. on Nucha de Bende halas.

26:29

So if you wanna hear some

26:31

good old-fashioned cheese mip, learn who's

26:33

dating who and get inspired by

26:35

some truly incredible stories along the

26:37

way, pause the show you're listening

26:39

to right now and subscribe to

26:41

Nucha de Bend halas on Apple

26:43

Podcast, Spotify, and wherever you get

26:45

your podcast. Hey,

26:48

we're on a break right now, and

26:51

I guess we're supposed to promo our

26:53

show. Yes, so we're gonna talk about

26:55

our show. We're gonna talk about a

26:57

show that you took a break from

27:00

to like talk about how you should

27:02

live into our show. Technically, we're not

27:04

on break. We're still working. It's cold

27:06

shit. They don't tell you and tell

27:09

you. And it's all this shit that

27:11

we wish people would have told us.

27:13

And shout out to Brian Jorgensen. And

27:15

we're back. All right, try this on

27:18

for size, Lemo. My husband's friend, 42-mail,

27:20

kissed me, 33- female. Should I tell

27:22

my husband? Our sons play football together

27:25

Saturday and Sunday. We spent most of

27:27

our weekend with the rest of the

27:29

parents on the team as a group.

27:31

Anyway, one of the moms had a

27:34

party. We'd all been drinking and dancing

27:36

and what you do at parties. I

27:38

said, I need to get some cigarettes.

27:40

He said he'd walk with me. We

27:43

were just talking about random things, having

27:45

a laugh, nothing inappropriate. Just as we

27:47

get around the corner on the way

27:49

back, he stopped. And I said, he

27:52

had to say something to me. He

27:54

said, you're so amazing and beautiful. I

27:56

laughed awkwardly and said, oh, oh, thanks.

27:58

amazing too. I'm glad we're friends. Before

28:01

I knew what was happening, he grabbed

28:03

me around the waist and kissed me. I didn't

28:05

kiss him back. I just kind of froze. When he

28:07

realized I didn't kiss him back, he started

28:09

to apologize and said he thought I was attracted

28:12

to him as well. I told him he can't

28:14

do that. We're both married. I'm very much in

28:16

love with my husband and he had a beautiful,

28:18

thoughtful wife and he shouldn't be doing things like

28:20

that. him and his wife have only

28:22

recently got married and she's such a

28:25

lovely woman. Oh my gosh! I don't

28:27

want to cause any problems in their

28:29

marriage so early on. And I just

28:32

don't like drama. He said, sorry

28:34

again, I told him we just forget

28:36

it had happened. He'd had too much

28:38

to drink, he made a mistake, just

28:41

don't make the same mistake. Again.

28:43

I didn't tell my husband. Because

28:45

again, I don't want to cause

28:47

a problem. Yeah. We don't lie to

28:49

each other. And I realize I'm not lying.

28:52

I just haven't told him what

28:54

happened. And I want to, but

28:56

I'm scared of what will happen.

28:58

And how he will react, not just

29:00

towards me, not towards me, but

29:02

his friend. He knows I would

29:04

never cheat. We've been either 18

29:06

years, high school sweethearts. It's

29:09

never been anybody but him.

29:11

I'm starting to question my behavior.

29:13

Did I say anything to make

29:15

him think I'd want him to kiss

29:17

me? I get what she's going through

29:20

because like the, you know, when you are

29:22

a type of person that thinks

29:24

of group dynamics and not wanting

29:27

to start drama, it's like, is

29:29

this worth it to like, but you

29:31

know that the consequence might be

29:33

that it hurts a lot more people.

29:36

I think you would blow up the

29:38

whole friendship. It would. Yeah, it

29:40

would. And so I can understand

29:42

her being in a pickle of, because

29:44

I would want to tell you.

29:46

this friendship group to blow up. And

29:48

the reason she's going back and

29:50

trying to blame herself is so that

29:53

she can like, you know, have a reason for

29:55

hiding it, I think, you know, but I

29:57

don't think it's true, you know, I think

29:59

that Yeah. Um, guys are whack too.

30:01

Yeah. Guys are whack in the head.

30:04

Why'd have to ruin it like that?

30:06

That really sucks. That's just a really

30:08

shitty situation. Um, I would also like

30:10

just. If he does it again, like

30:13

be on the lookout, like type of

30:15

thing. But also. But also. Yeah, but

30:17

that's the thing is that I wouldn't

30:19

want to ever be near that person.

30:21

Yeah, exactly. So it already is kind

30:24

of fucked up. I know he fucked

30:26

it up. It's already fucked up. It's

30:28

already fucked up. Yeah. So I think

30:30

I would end up telling you, but

30:33

I would explain it like that. Like,

30:35

hey, I'm really just worried that there's

30:37

going to ruin everything. And I would

30:39

say exactly how she wrote it how

30:42

she wrote it. But and I would

30:44

try to temper you from going after

30:46

him That's impossible, but I know that

30:48

the group would not be friends The

30:51

conversation is immediately happening. Yeah, like if

30:53

that's my friend and they kissed you

30:55

the conversation is immediately happening Like what

30:57

the hell do you who the hell

30:59

do you think you are? You kiss

31:02

my wife? Yeah, now you got to

31:04

kiss me dog But I hate the

31:06

way she described her that's so presumptuous

31:08

that this guy not only Like his

31:11

reasoning is like apologizing because she thought

31:13

he thought that she was into him

31:15

too But like you just got married

31:17

to your partner like you just got

31:20

married Like you just got married and

31:22

you're already like all this chicks into

31:24

me. I'm like I'm gonna make a

31:26

move side affair Like, what the fuck?

31:28

Cigarettes? Oh, this is a good opportunity

31:31

for me to begin my side affair.

31:33

Honestly, I do think the truth sets

31:35

everyone free. Like, that's so unfair to

31:37

that wife. It's unfair to the husband

31:40

too. Like, yeah. It's unfair to the

31:42

husband to not know, to, like, treat

31:44

him like he's a little baby. And

31:46

like, we can't tell him because we

31:49

don't all do. It's not that he's

31:51

a little baby. It's that you know

31:53

it's going to explode to explode the

31:55

whole relationship. It's going to explode the

31:58

whole relationship. It's going to explode the

32:00

whole relationship. A relationship shouldn't be so

32:02

fake. That's what I'm saying, is that

32:04

the truth sets everyone free even though

32:06

it feels like terrible in the moment?

32:09

Yep. Because if I knew same shit

32:11

like if I knew that we were

32:13

in a friend group and like one

32:15

of my guy buddies wanted to pound

32:18

pound on you Yeah, that's a fake

32:20

friendship already. Uh-huh. So like what are

32:22

we doing? Yeah, because like now you

32:24

have to worry that that guy is

32:27

just like I fucking me every time

32:29

that we're in a room together Yep.

32:31

Yeah, I don't way I believe and

32:33

I would feel really fucking uncomfortable too.

32:36

I wouldn't blame him for I fucking

32:38

you either because I do it quite

32:40

a I'd be like, I get it

32:42

rather. Yeah, I don't know. I just

32:44

doesn't seem like exactly like it's the

32:47

friendship group is already ruined. It's fake.

32:49

It's tainted. It's all fake. I don't

32:51

think it's fake. I think it's tainted.

32:53

It's now fake. It's become fake. Yeah,

32:56

I mean that friendship group is going

32:58

to break up Yeah, friendship group break

33:00

up. Isn't that tricky one? It's his

33:02

fault. It's his fault. His fucking fault.

33:05

I know it's his fault So like

33:07

he should own it and by the

33:09

way his wife newly wed wife needs

33:11

to know that that's what I'm saying

33:13

is that like Scumbag ultimately I think

33:16

the truth is better than Then keeping

33:18

a group together he should have to

33:20

wear a shirt. That's his I am

33:22

a cheating scum bag. Yeah for a

33:25

month straight every time they all hang

33:27

out. Shame Shame, shame, shame, shame. I'm

33:29

a cheating scumbag. He should have to

33:31

get everyone beers the whole time too.

33:34

You can't even drink his to get

33:36

everyone beers. He's to wear an A.

33:38

Yeah, I wear the A. Okay, check

33:40

this one out. Okay. What is this

33:43

thing called that my fiance does that

33:45

feels really invalidating? Okay, this is a

33:47

42 male speaking. I'm about his 38

33:49

female. Okay. About his 38 female. Okay.

33:51

My fiancé and I have been together

33:54

for five years and this has always

33:56

happened. Usually I let it go, but

33:58

we're a year out from getting married

34:00

and it's starting to make me think

34:03

that's actually something I should bring up

34:05

to her. So when we're in a

34:07

disagreement or even just expressing my opinion,

34:09

I'll tell her my side of things

34:12

and in the... moment, she'll say she

34:14

understands. But if the issue comes up

34:16

again later, she has completely rewritten how

34:18

and why I feel the way I

34:21

do. For example, I don't like my

34:23

brother-in-law. He's kind of a day. I

34:25

make kind of an effort to get

34:27

along with him because I love my

34:29

sister, but I don't make an effort

34:32

to hang out with the dude. But

34:34

my fiance asked me why I don't

34:36

like him. I told her I don't

34:38

like that he uses, quote, quote, I'm

34:41

brutally honest, I'm brutally honest. A couple

34:43

weeks later, my wife and her girlfriend

34:45

are hanging out in the living room,

34:47

and I overhear her tell her friend

34:50

that I don't like the brother-in-law because

34:52

I'm, quote, a protective older brother. What?

34:54

This isn't true. I love my sister.

34:56

We're not that close. And I've never

34:59

had an issue with any of her

35:01

previous boyfriends. I brought it up later

35:03

with my fiance, and she told me

35:05

she knew I thought I don't like

35:07

the brother-in-law because of personality, but what

35:10

she really thinks is because I'm over-

35:12

But it was obvious that she was

35:14

just placating me when she agreed with

35:16

my perspective. I know this discrepancy isn't

35:19

a huge deal, but just feels off

35:21

to have someone who's supposed to know

35:23

you. Exactly. Yeah. Someone who's supposed to

35:25

know you. Exactly. Yeah. Someone who's supposed

35:28

to know you. In and out and

35:30

have your back be so dismissive of

35:32

what I actually think or feel. and

35:34

can't be convinced otherwise. Yes. This happens

35:36

enough that I'm hesitant to share my

35:39

thoughts or opinions with her because of

35:41

how she might skew them later. Yeah.

35:43

I've definitely been in relationships like this.

35:45

I think you have to. The guy's

35:48

perspective. Yeah. It's just, it's really, it's

35:50

infuriating because it's the person that's supposed

35:52

to understand you the most. Right. And

35:54

like when they don't and they get

35:57

it so wrong and you thought that

35:59

they. got it the first time, but

36:01

then also like the disrespect of saying

36:03

something completely different to another person outside

36:06

of our relationship and like saying it

36:08

so matter of factly that's what I

36:10

can't stand I can't stand that either

36:12

because they're like not only do you

36:14

not understand me at all for me

36:17

you're speaking for me exactly and you're

36:19

imposing your like armchair psychology exactly and

36:21

then you're saying that no that's actually

36:23

what's going on here and like I'm

36:26

so I know everything yeah I'm so

36:28

high brow please bleep both of those

36:30

mark I'm sorry I'm sorry I think

36:32

we're deep enough in a that we

36:35

can talk around and find out. Get

36:37

them lemo. I don't like being censored.

36:39

I know. What's the point? To ask

36:41

the YouTube Gods Man. I know, but

36:44

like, listen, this is it for a

36:46

niche audience anyway. Yeah, true. I don't

36:48

need the extra five cents from AdSense.

36:50

We're not getting... Accurate. Accurate. Yeah. Yeah,

36:52

man. Look, I think... I wouldn't marry

36:55

this person until... they until they never

36:57

marry this person. I would never marry

36:59

this person. Just because of the arrogance

37:01

of like I don't even think they're

37:04

willing to admit that they do understand

37:06

if anything I would I have trust

37:08

issues now because if you say that

37:10

you understand me I don't know if

37:13

like secretly you actually made your own

37:15

diagnosis. Yeah exactly. And like secretly, secretly,

37:17

like, okay, yeah, that's what you think,

37:19

that's what you think about you, and

37:21

your, you know, opinions about yourself. Oh,

37:24

what a big opinion, boy. Yeah, and

37:26

then I go to my friends later

37:28

and tell them how, like, it's something

37:30

completely different. Oh, it's so frustrating. Yeah,

37:33

I don't like it. One of my

37:35

exes, like, I found a conversation that

37:37

they were, like, making me sound like

37:39

a psychopath for liking Eminem. that like

37:42

I think he's like a god and

37:44

like you know I'm just have such

37:46

bad taste of music and like I

37:48

would that's just jealousy and it was

37:51

to a girl jealous oh so he's

37:53

just shitting on you yeah he's shitting

37:55

on me to this girl yeah who

37:57

has who's like a music like a

37:59

You're just a music of fish. She

38:02

goes to Amiva Records every week.

38:04

Yeah, she's like really into music So

38:06

he's like just shitting on me about

38:08

my taste in music She likes to

38:10

emphasize how good her taste is and how

38:12

good her taste is and how he agrees

38:14

with her taste Wow, would you do lemo?

38:16

Did you stand up for yourself when

38:19

you saw this conversation? Well, yeah,

38:21

I did because it was also a girl

38:23

that sent him a picture of his over

38:25

tits for a joke for a joke. How were they're

38:27

fine? Can

38:29

you describe them? I'm getting

38:32

them. Probably like, can you

38:34

like describe them? I mean,

38:36

they're like the same size of mine.

38:38

So it's like, they're fine.

38:40

Oh, I've seen them then. But like,

38:43

was it a very funny joke?

38:45

I've written better jokes. I could

38:47

see the, I could see the bit. So

38:49

insane. Is this joke? You never

38:51

done that? You, yeah, and then I would get

38:53

gasoline. Like, you have, like, you don't understand how, like,

38:55

regular friend groups operate. Like, you have bad judgment. People

38:57

do bits and jokes and all that stuff. Like, people

38:59

are always sending tits. Like, you should send tits to

39:02

your guy friends. Like, it's funny. Did he say that? No. Exactly.

39:04

But, like, isn't that what you're saying, man? That it's such a

39:06

joke I should send tits to my guy friends? Yeah, yeah, yeah,

39:08

yeah. Because, like, they'll think they'll think it's like,

39:10

they'll think it's hilarious. They'll think it's hilarious.

39:12

They'll think it's hilarious. They'll think it's hilarious.

39:15

It's hilarious. It's hilarious. I think

39:17

I was thinking about... Please don't

39:19

do it. I think we'll make

39:21

a good type 5. Please don't.

39:23

That's really good. That's really

39:26

good. Yeah, that one's, I mean,

39:28

I wouldn't marry that person.

39:30

No, hell no. I can't even... That

39:32

might sound crazy to some people

39:34

by the way, but if they're

39:37

not going to understand

39:39

you and represent

39:41

you, they're misrepresenting

39:43

you. They've already decided.

39:46

So you're getting a warning shot that

39:48

they don't listen to you before you

39:50

guys are even married. And they, like to

39:52

me, the most important thing is like to be

39:54

seen. And like, it's like this person

39:57

is not even seeing you. They're putting

39:59

a projection. layer over you and deciding

40:01

that's what you are. Exactly. And

40:03

they're not even trying to see you.

40:05

Exactly. I have a friend that was

40:07

like this too that were not friends

40:10

anymore. She yelled at me in the

40:12

middle of a casino. But like she thought

40:14

that the reason she was yelling at

40:16

me was because I kept telling her

40:18

my point of view and she kept projecting

40:20

her own thing on me. And like it

40:22

would, I could not convince her. of the

40:24

actual truth of who I am as a

40:27

person. Even my one of my best friends

40:29

was like, yeah, that's not. who Nikki is,

40:31

like, this girl thought that I was, like,

40:33

trying to flirt with all these guys and,

40:36

like, just trying to, like, just trying

40:38

to, like, try to take all the

40:40

attention from her. I'm like, I could

40:42

give, I don't even track it to,

40:45

like, most people, I'm just not attracted

40:47

to them at all. I just find

40:49

them very boring and I don't give

40:51

a shit. Also, this girl was married.

40:53

So, like, why is it upsetting so

40:56

much so much anyway? and I do that with

40:58

anybody like girls guys it doesn't really matter like

41:00

I would just if there's a joke opportunity I'm

41:02

taking it and I and like don't put the

41:04

ball on the TV if you don't want to

41:06

left you know and sorry that you're boring but

41:09

I wasn't trying to like flirt with anybody

41:11

like I'm not and I was the only single one

41:13

in the group right you know well not that that

41:15

that that not that year the year before that I

41:17

was single but she got mad at me for the

41:20

same thing the year before that year before that year

41:22

before that yeah yeah And then the second year I

41:24

was just like, you just don't get me. Yeah,

41:26

because you were with me at the time. Yeah.

41:28

And you really missed me too. Well, I wanted

41:30

you to come. I know. Like, there was the

41:33

whole reason that, like, guys, our partners

41:35

weren't allowed to come. Yeah. And I

41:37

was bummed because like, we had just

41:39

started dating and I would have way

41:41

rather had you there. And then it

41:43

was very clear why our partners

41:45

wouldn't, couldn't come because she wanted

41:47

to flirt with everybody with

41:49

everybody in Vegas in Vegas. so bored

41:51

and annoyed and just started I was

41:53

just like making jokes because I wasn't

41:56

even I didn't even have gambling money

41:58

really so like I'm just there's just

42:00

no relationship. Yeah, and then she thought

42:02

I was trying to take the tension away from

42:04

her. Yeah, but yeah, she wouldn't ever like listen

42:07

to me about like that's that wasn't all my

42:09

intention, I don't care at all. That's the thing

42:11

is if if your friend doesn't have

42:13

your back or your significant other

42:15

doesn't have your back, there's just

42:17

no relationship. Yeah, exactly. They don't even

42:20

want to hear you out. And that's why I'm like,

42:22

yeah, this is done. I don't want to fight for

42:24

a fight for it. Yeah, because what am I

42:26

fighting for? Exactly. Like you'll never

42:28

really see me, I think. Exactly. Because

42:30

it's not the first time. That's the thing

42:33

about you too, man. Like, I love that, I

42:35

don't know, one time there was a guy who was

42:37

like trash talking me or whatever, and

42:39

Lima was there, and she just eviscerated

42:41

this dude. Yeah, because he's trying to

42:44

like get points with me, like, like, yeah, you

42:46

know, you know, stew, he's like this, he's like,

42:48

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

42:50

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

42:52

like, like, like, like, like, like, My favorite

42:55

thing is I had just gotten out of

42:57

a relationship with like my ex had shit

42:59

talked to me like everybody. Yeah. And basically

43:01

just shit talking our relationship to everybody.

43:03

And then I'm with Lemo for like

43:05

I don't know a cup of coffee

43:08

and she's already defending me to this

43:10

guy like like stabbing him like taking

43:12

out his end trails and showing him

43:14

like his fucking heart and shit. You

43:16

know in front of everybody which I

43:18

you know I just wasn't used to

43:20

that because I had such disloyalility in

43:23

my previous relationship. But I was like,

43:25

dude, my chick is a rider, man.

43:27

You know what I mean? Like, it's

43:29

just, like, that's what you want. You

43:31

want somebody where you know, you don't

43:33

even have to be in the room.

43:35

You know that they're in there fighting

43:37

for you. Yeah. I think the worst

43:40

thing I've ever said about you is

43:42

like, yeah, he told me he was

43:44

going to be the dishwasher three days

43:46

ago. And like, it's been three days.

43:48

I know. I mean, I do the dishes all daying time.

43:50

I know, you cook too, like, sheesh. I feel

43:52

like you're just trying to take it, you know,

43:54

it brings me joy to like, to like, to

43:56

like, to like, to, yeah, to bust your balls

43:59

and like nag you. and like you're just

44:01

like taking away my joys. I do like

44:03

to do it. It kind of sucks. Yeah, so

44:05

have somebody out there who has your back

44:07

at base level. If they don't have your

44:10

back before you get married, you're screwed.

44:12

Yeah, especially, it's not even like,

44:14

not only does she not have his

44:16

back, but she's like arguing with him

44:18

about how he feels about his injury. I

44:21

hate those types of people, man. Like

44:23

you're telling me how I feel. Can't

44:25

stand it. I was at a buddy's house recently

44:27

and I was talking about how I'm a

44:29

petty person and he's like, I don't, he's

44:31

like, I don't like that word, petty. And I'm

44:33

like, well I'm not talking about you. Uh-huh.

44:35

I'm the one who's petty. Yeah, I'm calling myself

44:38

petty. I'm petty. I'm petty. I'm petty.

44:40

I'm getting myself petty. I'm petty. We

44:42

did have an argument one time because

44:44

I used the word sensitive word sensitive

44:46

and we had different definitions of

44:48

that word sensitive and we had

44:50

different definitions of that word. Yeah, where

44:52

I was like, like I was basically

44:55

complimenting that I like that you're

44:57

sensitive. Oh, I do remember that

44:59

one. And you, because the way that

45:01

I think it's, the way that most

45:03

girls describe a sensitive guy is like,

45:05

oh, he like cares, he's like empathetic,

45:07

he's like, you know, he like has this like

45:09

soft spot. I was like, I'm not a

45:12

pussy. Yeah, exactly. God, I was so

45:14

dumb. I was like, I'm not a

45:16

pussy brother. It's like, I think that,

45:18

because you got triggered every time I

45:20

said that word, I was like, I

45:22

think you're like misunderstanding what I'm saying

45:24

about you. Like, I was. Yeah,

45:26

I was not sensitive. And then

45:28

you were being sensitive about

45:30

being sensitive. I'm being called sensitive.

45:33

So dumb. So dumb. So dumb.

45:35

It's so funny how clearly you

45:37

could look back on yourself and see how

45:39

you can look back on yourself and

45:41

see how it means there's growth. Oh yeah.

45:43

Oh yeah. You know? But my God, just

45:46

very... You know, when you can look back

45:48

on yourself and laugh, it's a treat.

45:50

It's a real treat. I never look

45:52

back at laugh. I just get

45:54

so embarrassed and I cringe inside

45:56

myself. I do that too. I cringe inside

45:59

myself. Yeah. Yeah, I do that too.

46:01

My brain likes to remind me

46:03

of just like every embarrassing thing

46:06

that I've done. Yeah. I've seen some

46:08

of those. Yeah. Yeah. There was one

46:10

recently we can't talk about but

46:12

no, I know. Don't worry. That's

46:14

on repeat every single day. Every

46:16

single day. Every single day. We'll

46:18

tell you guys about it one

46:20

day, but not not today. To the point

46:23

where like I'm like, I should just

46:25

write an apology letter. I'm like,

46:27

I should just write an apology

46:29

letter. Not yet, but one day. No one

46:31

day will tell them no Don't don't do

46:33

that one day will tell them when I'm

46:35

dead All right fine Well that is all the

46:37

time that we have for today. We hope you

46:40

guys are having a good one out there

46:42

And thank you so much for supporting the

46:44

show nothing helps to show more than you

46:46

guys So we'll see you on the next

46:48

one have your partners back exactly

46:50

have your partners back and share

46:52

the show with your friends nothing

46:54

helps more. Thanks everybody. We'll see

46:56

you next time Yeah.