40 for 40 MORE BOWLS: Handjob Hills Have Eyes

40 for 40 MORE BOWLS: Handjob Hills Have Eyes

Released Sunday, 29th December 2024
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40 for 40 MORE BOWLS: Handjob Hills Have Eyes

40 for 40 MORE BOWLS: Handjob Hills Have Eyes

40 for 40 MORE BOWLS: Handjob Hills Have Eyes

40 for 40 MORE BOWLS: Handjob Hills Have Eyes

Sunday, 29th December 2024
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Episode Transcript

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0:34

Welcome to the to

0:36

the full cast. You are listening. to

0:39

get to get another installment of of

0:41

40, our bowl our bull previews,

0:44

where we discuss. every every

0:46

single for only only as long

0:48

as we absolutely have to.

0:50

have to. Join me as always. as always

0:52

is Ryan Annie, Holly

0:54

Anderson, Jason Jason Kirk, Michael

0:57

Server on the ones

0:59

and twos. twos. Hello Hello Who

1:01

would like to Who would like

1:03

to get started? Well,

1:06

the format that that

1:08

we had been

1:10

using, usually as Holly Holly

1:13

a a bit of lore for each

1:15

each bowl and The internet

1:17

the internet has decided that

1:19

Holly is not allowed to

1:21

do that right now. now because

1:24

of of apparently, as I understand.

1:27

as I understand So

1:29

I I propose we sit in

1:31

silence, and and let the listener Just ponder some

1:33

things. things. All right, what is bowl

1:35

first bowl, theoretically, that we would

1:38

be talking about, if we were

1:40

talking about a bowl game right

1:42

now? Up next would be, be, I

1:44

mean, I think I think it's appropriate that

1:46

next on our slate would be Alabama,

1:48

Michigan, because we've literally already seen

1:51

that. seen that. Wasn't that even wasn't that even

1:53

this calendar year? true, that's true, because they

1:55

played it in the the Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:57

So we have, we have already seen

1:59

that in in 2024. We haven't seen

2:01

it in this venue though.

2:03

We haven't seen it in

2:05

this event that is slightly

2:07

less prestigious than that one

2:09

was. Slightly. I think slightly

2:11

is fair. More willing to

2:13

help college football evolve into

2:15

its new age though. I'm

2:17

not the outback bowl because

2:19

that's what this is. No,

2:21

the outback bowl never stood.

2:24

No, the outback bowl lives

2:26

on in my heart. Ryan,

2:28

you are now the real

2:30

like West Burrito man or

2:32

whatever. The OPEC ball lives

2:34

on in my heart like

2:36

that chart of shrapnel. Like

2:38

the short of shrapnel and

2:40

solid snakes forehead? Yes, the

2:42

one, the one in Tony's

2:44

chest that he's trying to

2:46

keep from killing him at

2:48

all times. It's fried also,

2:50

that shrapnel. That's right, that's

2:52

right. I got the Relia

2:54

Quest euro, it's delicious. It's

2:56

lodged in my thorax. I'll

2:58

die if you remove it.

3:00

It's load bearing, the Relia

3:02

Quest. Um, omelet. Holly was

3:05

briefly appearing and Holly is

3:07

now back maybe. She returns.

3:09

God fucking damn it. That's

3:11

her all right. What's happening

3:13

here is that all of

3:15

the whining and complaining about

3:17

Alabama not being in the

3:19

playoffs. Alabama, why didn't Alabama

3:21

get Indiana spot? Why didn't

3:23

Alabama get SMU spot? Why

3:25

didn't Alabama get Clemson spot?

3:27

I know it went to

3:29

them because they won the

3:31

ACC, but why can't Alabama

3:33

have it anyway? Why didn't

3:35

Alabama get Arizona State spot?

3:37

Yeah, why didn't Alabama get

3:39

Penn State spot, frankly? Frankly.

3:41

All of that, all of

3:43

that whining and moaning is

3:45

now coming to roost and

3:48

poisoning your shutdown full cast

3:50

40 for 40. Preventing it

3:52

for being great. Bocked down

3:54

by crimson dyed botanet, the

3:56

DDOS attacks from the Tuscaloosa

3:58

Hacker Collective. That's right. right?

4:00

They They don't want you to know that.

4:02

this is a matchup This is

4:04

a match -up between bag dropping

4:06

program program, out Michigan. doing work

4:08

in there doing work in the

4:10

NIL community. is too broke which the broke

4:12

for the number one recruit,

4:14

apparently. Bama! out out out out here, out

4:16

here, having to beg for scraps of

4:18

money. of money through their athletics director. The war the war

4:21

Alabama is on, it. It is with

4:23

dollars. dollars. How are you losing

4:25

this war? What are you doing?

4:27

are you are you spending less

4:29

money on football than other people?

4:31

than other no less. Come on. less.

4:33

On one side is, you

4:35

know, is, Michigan. with such

4:37

poor people as the owner

4:39

of the Miami of the Miami Dolphins. Sure.

4:41

Right? on the other side, you

4:44

have Business Titans Alabama, whose supporters include

4:46

the guy who owned the port and whose

4:48

family has owned the port of

4:50

Mobile for a of years. for a

4:52

That's, I love comparing the kind

4:54

of billionaires that different programs have,

4:56

because Michigan's guys are all like. financial

4:59

wizard because guy

5:01

who came up with 32

5:03

good business ideas some guy who

5:05

like up with 32 good business ideas. own

5:07

all the air in Alabama. I own

5:09

My all the got it, Alabama. my

5:11

family been selling air there for my

5:14

family had think that's fine air there for

5:16

a year. I think smell of you know

5:18

fried foods or whatever That's good

5:20

for you. delicious. It's gonna smell

5:22

like football like business The business ideas?

5:24

What, fucking up dominoes pizza? That,

5:26

come on. Hold on. Hold on, I have everybody, if you want

5:28

to be have everybody. you want to

5:30

be successful in business, I have

5:32

a great thing you can do.

5:34

Jason the hit it on the

5:36

head to you need to take a

5:38

successful business and fuck it up.

5:40

This is just burrow inside it and lay lay your

5:42

eggs in it? publicly apologize and repair

5:44

the business. and now are You are the original genius.

5:46

I'm I'm excited to see

5:48

how the party city bankruptcy

5:50

leads Michigan back to a

5:53

back to a national champion I'm gonna tank party city

5:55

so hard. I to think. All

5:57

those sexy, fire fire lady dresses costumes.

6:01

What was your business? We sold Disney

6:03

themed birthday plates and napkins. Did you

6:05

fail at it? How? How did you

6:07

do that? Did the children stop having

6:09

birthdays or something? This is a weird

6:11

Children of Men's sequel that you come

6:14

up with. I did like that there

6:16

was one picture of a party city

6:18

that had used up all its he-

6:20

its last bits of Helium to inflate

6:22

letter balloons that said no Helium. That

6:24

was with the less the Helium. That's

6:26

poignant, man. Really? Aren't we all feeling

6:28

like that here in December? A little

6:30

bit? The greatest, the greatest, like. new

6:32

story of all time are always like

6:34

my favorite like when they're like helium

6:36

the planet is literally running out of

6:38

helium somebody's like I can't hear you

6:40

doesn't the sun have a shut down

6:42

just go get it yeah that's what

6:44

I'm saying apparently it's all floating somewhere

6:46

so go get it just wave a

6:48

net or something right you go into

6:51

the sun You disrupt a business model,

6:53

lay eggs in it. You fuck up

6:55

the sun, you put a Michigan grad

6:57

in charge of the sun making money,

6:59

and then it'll just start shitting helium.

7:01

Then Kirkkirk Street goes on television. Why

7:03

we put the sun in the playoff?

7:05

Who's the sunbeat? The sun is literally

7:07

going down. You know, when the sun

7:09

goes down, coaches have to adjust their

7:11

roster planning. The sun spends more time

7:13

down in December. It gets worse over

7:15

the course of the football season. And

7:17

you want to reward it? Are you

7:19

kidding me? You know, gosh, I'm looking

7:21

out my window here at 3.30 p.m.

7:23

And there's no sun anywhere. Imagine you're

7:25

trying to keep these 100 young men

7:28

in line and the sun goes down.

7:30

You're only paid $10 million dollars. That

7:32

makes me so sad. Hey Nick, Nick,

7:34

Nick, you never liked the Sun, did

7:36

you? No, never liked it. My mind

7:38

is a sunless place. I don't know.

7:40

I saw Nick outside it gave to

7:42

him, and I think he liked the

7:44

Sun. He missed the Sun quite a

7:46

bit. Reminder that Nick did not know.

7:48

the name of

7:50

a bar that was

7:52

400 yards from his

7:54

office, the the office

7:56

that he went

7:58

to for 17 17 years

8:00

straight, and he

8:02

had never taken a

8:05

look over and

8:07

recognized the name of

8:09

the of the restaurant. Nick

8:11

Saiben with the Cleveland

8:13

Browns. Browns. He coached in in the

8:15

Mac He coached at Michigan at

8:17

And it was so clear, it

8:19

him on clear in Columbus, on that

8:21

there's a reason he got the that

8:23

of the a reason he got it was

8:25

the only moment I briefly looked

8:27

up the Desmond Howard was up in, Desmond

8:29

Howard was kidding here, are we light

8:31

cold weather? like, You know, because Saban

8:33

coached in the South. Saban, you

8:35

you see because Savin coached in the from West

8:37

Virginia. you could in Ohio, I coached

8:39

in Michigan. West Virginia. We will not,

8:41

we will not make jokes about

8:43

me being a. a a weakling. I

8:45

took the took the dolphin's job

8:47

for a reason! reason. I hate that

8:49

shit. Nobody likes that shit. No. I

8:51

kept waiting waiting for him

8:53

to say something real real raw. Like to

8:55

just be like be be honest as

8:57

I can't feel my dick does. I can't fill

9:00

my dick when it's cold. It's just

9:02

numb numb. Anyway, I think that's

9:04

I think that's the Michigan... Alabama

9:06

approved. Unclear. Unclear. to me, to me. Alabama's

9:08

favored by favored by And a half. to

9:10

and I wanted to ask any of

9:12

you that the that mean that the

9:14

score is going to be and a a

9:16

half to zero? That's what it feels

9:18

feels like, 14 to 0. I just want

9:20

to point .5. want to point out Alabama want to

9:22

point out team lost to a team that lost

9:24

to Ohio which which lost to Michigan. And

9:27

also Michigan has already, has noted, as noted,

9:29

Michigan has already, I'm just reading my notes

9:31

right now. notes Michigan has also already beaten

9:33

Alabama this year along the way to

9:35

a national title, something Alabama hasn't won for

9:37

four seasons and counting. counting. Those Those

9:39

are my entire notes for this game. notes for this

9:41

game It's no problem all

9:44

the information the than the

9:46

than the rely a Relya quest

9:48

-ness of it all. of

9:51

it all Outback it's the outback ball.

9:53

I got damn you all over

9:55

the the bones the the

9:58

remnants, fossils about back. Shrimp

10:00

bones. They have the Tampa

10:03

cybersecurity concern. We're starting. Next,

10:05

next, next time you order

10:07

Bloom and Onion, ask for

10:09

it, Boneless. Just see what

10:12

they do. Can I get

10:14

a reliable question? Medium rare.

10:16

Need the reliable question. Hoop

10:19

and onion. Aye. Good I.

10:21

Could I get a reliable

10:23

class? No,

10:26

no reliance. Just closed. Arnar,

10:29

Arnar, Arnar. Aye. You, you,

10:31

you, you, you might need

10:33

sober security. Well, come on

10:36

down to Tampa. This is,

10:38

this is a really good

10:41

impression of Spencer doing it.

10:43

I've been bitten by one

10:45

of our only creatures! Listen,

10:48

you don't do an oxyx.

10:50

Jason is established with the

10:52

oxyx. I'm the ranking of

10:55

the ranking Australia now. Listen,

10:57

he's the native Georgian and

11:00

Australia was also a penal

11:02

colony. Yeah, only right that

11:04

we give him this throne.

11:07

Yeah, I would like to

11:09

see one Mad Max episode

11:12

set in Georgia just for

11:14

the... I mean we literally

11:16

have an ongoing water war

11:19

with Tennessee so... The script

11:21

just writes itself. My name's

11:23

Caden. It's the only way

11:26

to save the Tennessee Georgia

11:28

series is to make it

11:31

for water rights. I like

11:33

that in this version of...

11:35

The Mad Max

11:38

Wasteland. Augusta still

11:40

operating still as

11:42

it is. That's

11:45

where all

11:47

the water is

11:50

going. as it is.

11:52

That's where all that

11:54

the movie

11:57

would that the movie would

11:59

less ground.

12:02

Everyone's just stuck

12:04

in traffic

12:06

walking toward each

12:09

other in your

12:11

weapons and

12:13

you will be

12:16

given each cheese!

12:18

bars. Drop your weapons and

12:20

you will be given pimento

12:23

cheese! Six flags Six Flags

12:25

is the prison planet. They bought you

12:27

Joe! a green jacket as

12:29

a member! as a member! Gotta got

12:31

to be driving over

12:33

to over chicken wington. I mean, how do we

12:36

not chicken winged. bullet

12:38

farm? how do we

12:40

not already have a bullet farm? something we

12:42

like something we would have? I

12:44

think the the factory, yeah. Factory, yeah. No, wait,

12:47

wait, Just spraying

12:49

chrome everywhere. That movie's about

12:51

Georgia. Come on. come on. Tony

12:56

the Tiger Bowl, the Sun Bowl, that's

12:58

right. Is that right Is

13:00

that Australian? you Are you trying? to begin?

13:02

Does Tony? It's Gus Johnson.

13:04

Does Tony have a Gus nickname?

13:06

Tony. I call this

13:08

guy guy the Tiger. Wait, no, he

13:10

calls him Anthony. Call him Frost. He's

13:12

doing the Hollywood thing Tony O.

13:15

T. Gray. Where it's like it's

13:17

like the popular, the famous person.

13:19

Anthony is. It's friend. So

13:21

so what if

13:23

he inexplicably goes Castilian

13:25

Spanish and he's

13:27

like Castilian Spanish and he's like Antonio?

13:29

Which games is Gus

13:31

Johnson actually calling

13:33

this postseason? Don't

13:36

is Gus Johnson actually calling this

13:38

no. Don't. Don't worry it, the

13:40

one on, probably the one on CBS,

13:42

I think. I think. Yeah, That

13:44

seems right. right. That's your

13:46

opinion. I'm so mad so

13:48

mad that they don't have like an El

13:50

Paso -fied version of the college

13:52

football theme that But with horns, with horns could do

13:54

it could do it mariachi style

13:57

it would be so it would

13:59

hit hit it'd be great for you can get

14:01

that made for you. Yeah, I

14:03

bet yeah, Corey, you're listening to right.

14:05

Corey, get us a Mariachi band. We

14:08

have, we have, we have, Corey, the

14:10

hardest working member of the forecast. We

14:12

have several talented musicologists to, yeah, whip

14:15

that right up. Yeah, in terms

14:17

of the pure rage that we

14:19

exude on this show, it kind of

14:21

makes sense that a full eighth

14:23

of our audience is made up of

14:25

band directors. Y'all, come on. Shout

14:28

out to Trey as well.

14:30

Shout to, uh, what's up

14:32

Trey? Shout up Trey, shout

14:34

to Christian Louisville. At Washington,

14:36

Washington will be the home

14:38

team for this one, which

14:41

is just the natural thing

14:43

for the long pack 12

14:45

affiliated. Sun Bowl. This is

14:47

a short pack 12. Their

14:49

geographic proximity, their geographic proximity,

14:51

their cultural compatibility with El

14:53

Paso. As we all know,

14:55

the Pacific Northwest and Mexico,

14:57

same place. This is also

14:59

the grand uncle of them

15:02

all. Everyone will remind you

15:04

of this. It's my favorite

15:06

bowl fact when they're like,

15:08

you know what the second

15:10

oldest bowl is? You're like,

15:12

who fucking cares? It's a

15:14

sun bowl. Okay, if you

15:16

had to guess right now.

15:18

That's because most people would

15:20

guess like the sugar or

15:23

the cotton or something. So

15:25

it's a surprise. It's surprising

15:27

that this thing has survived

15:29

that long. If you if

15:31

you had to guess right

15:33

now, is Louisville a closer

15:35

drive to El Paso or

15:37

is Seattle? 1,470 miles away.

15:39

This might be- I didn't

15:41

think it would be that

15:44

close. This might be the

15:46

least convenient ball game for

15:48

both participants. I'm sure there's

15:50

another one that I'm forgetting,

15:52

but this is probably pretty

15:54

far up there. Just combined

15:56

mileage for both sides. Liberty

15:58

fans having to- like go to a

16:00

to a different country is definitely inconvenient

16:02

for everyone. for is a

16:05

long drive. That this a right up

16:07

there. But this is right one thing I

16:09

do think it's in this age

16:11

of having weird concepts and military

16:13

contractors and military know we as bull

16:15

for the simpler times of the return

16:17

to the times of the return to

16:19

the Papa John's I do find

16:21

it strangely charming charming to

16:24

have a bull game that is named

16:26

Not a serial, not a not a

16:28

cereal company, but the mascot

16:30

of one specific cereal. I I

16:32

that specificity. And

16:35

it doesn't even rotate. rotate. No.

16:37

Like that's, I would, I would I

16:39

would maybe understand it

16:41

more it were like we're

16:43

trying like, is what is what

16:45

is, what is Frosted Flakes, Kelloggs, Kelloggs, probably. I I

16:47

would understand more of Kellogg. It's like

16:49

well we want well

16:51

Kellogg to, the Kellogg's Cinematic Universe is important,

16:54

so we just Tony keep everybody

16:56

above it. It's just Tony. The Coco Pops.

16:58

Also, it's called the Tony the Tiger

17:00

Sun Bowl, no mention of Frosted Flakes in

17:02

the title. of the bowl, which

17:04

makes it weirder of the bowl, which also

17:06

it weirder to me. But In a very specific

17:09

Sun Bowl this kind of

17:11

tracks tracks, semantically. It could be brought

17:13

to you by the Pringles man man. It

17:16

could it could be brought to you

17:18

by Harvey John Harvey who I think think

17:20

he was the guy who

17:22

invented invented wanted kids to

17:24

stop jerking off he wanted kids to stop

17:26

There's like a 30 -year

17:29

period where all foods were

17:31

invented where all foods were invented to put

17:33

the from jerking. Have we discussed it? like

17:35

the anti the anti now sponsors now

17:38

sponsors hand job hills bull game. With

17:40

of the online horniest

17:42

creating mascots. Oh, yeah. we

17:44

we definitely talked about

17:47

that part about that part into

17:49

the audience. Are we now? audience are

17:51

those of us who of us who saw the

17:53

hand job on live on television. live

17:55

was that? When was

17:58

that? Just El Paso

18:00

This is 2008 during a Utah

18:02

Texas game Bob Davy was the

18:04

one who circled it. This is

18:06

2008 brand have a mascot. Okay,

18:08

this appears to be yeah, the

18:10

cracklin' oat brand. This is 2008

18:13

during a Utah Texas game. Bob

18:15

Davy was the one who circled

18:17

it on the illustrator. Boy, you

18:19

really started that set. So in

18:21

three years we can have a

18:23

retrospective and checking in on... That's

18:26

true. Okay, here we go. This

18:28

is an off-season episode. We're going

18:30

to do a fake oral history

18:32

of the Battle of Hanjob Hill.

18:34

Manual history. Right? Do you do

18:36

it up like malice at the

18:39

palace style, but we'll get actors

18:41

and shit to do it? Yeah.

18:43

I could not believe what I

18:45

saw. Do you think there's somebody

18:47

who got engaged at like not

18:49

these maybe these two who's to

18:52

say maybe there's somebody else who

18:54

got I believe in this and

18:56

is like oh, it's very easy

18:58

to remember Maybe their kids are

19:00

at UTEP and they're like I'm

19:02

sitting where? What an honored location

19:05

a tradition for generation generation Maybe

19:07

truly the sun bowl a tradition

19:09

unlike any other maybe two people

19:11

were getting engaged right next to

19:13

that maybe the hand job was

19:15

a distraction You know when you're

19:18

setting up an engagement? It's like

19:20

it's like we need to divert

19:22

attention so that we can set

19:24

up the camera and then oh

19:26

no not that much of a

19:28

distraction Also in that same game

19:31

like the camera caught my caught

19:33

and lingered on Mike Price with

19:35

just like a full handful of

19:37

his own balls Yeah, and just

19:39

stayed that like it was a

19:41

very like it was a very

19:44

crotch-forward broadcast. What happens? Maxa Mac

19:46

Brown was at the handjob Hill

19:48

game. Okay. Good. Yeah. I was

19:50

there. Of all the

19:52

times to not

19:54

send in your

19:56

in your It was

19:59

there I got

20:01

the idea to

20:03

extract energy from

20:05

another man. energy from

20:07

another what she was what her.

20:09

On that day for sure. On that

20:12

day, I power of physical touch

20:14

and decided to apply it

20:16

for my own benefits. for my

20:18

own benefits. I just

20:20

remember, the the only thing would justically

20:22

was like, is I The was gone

20:24

from YouTube and everything. God, we

20:26

really are just losing God we really

20:28

are just legacy will only be

20:30

released upon my upon my passing. the

20:32

other hand, what an amazing thing

20:35

this would have been to have been to Mandela

20:37

means So this means there's a 2008 UTEP game on on

20:39

the dark web. That's the only

20:41

place you could find you could football game.

20:43

football game. probably on Playhub. Boys, I'm

20:45

going down Silk Road. I'm going just watching

20:47

Road. I'm not nothing, I'm just

20:50

watching Utah football. I'm just

20:52

checking up up on the

20:54

miners Matt Brown is retired. Matt Brown is retired, which

20:56

is retired. that we means that

20:58

we can maybe call him

21:01

for an interview about this and

21:03

tell him what it's about what

21:05

to see what he says just

21:07

want to see what he says. Sure. So, Judge Kirk,

21:09

we approve approve application to the to

21:11

the Supreme Court. You can get away with anything these

21:13

days be like break cabinet. You I be in

21:15

your favor. watching you. I like watching I

21:18

like watching videos jobs. I'm a I'm

21:20

a red -blooded American. I prefer when they're bored.

21:22

Yeah, I like it when that's weird. That part you

21:24

said said about liking when

21:26

it's boring. That's weird weird.

21:28

one search number Missouri. search You'd

21:30

be in would be You'd be of

21:32

those fake would be they're like number

21:35

one category porn They're like, they're like

21:37

in the desert. search.

21:39

They're like bored chick in the

21:41

was. She didn't look like she

21:43

was particularly enjoying herself, but you know what

21:45

she was doing getting it done getting

21:47

it done. Yeah, yeah, sure. Grind set.

21:49

I mean, it's football mindset.

21:51

Um, onto the to the next play. Yeah. You

21:53

know what? Getting it You know what,

21:55

getting it done, just plan What was that? plan

21:57

for It's not like it's not like a

21:59

bad... bathroom up there. I

22:02

think you're just gonna like, you're... Are you going

22:04

to watch the second half of UTAP Texas in

22:06

your jizzed up khakis. Maybe you just fired it

22:08

down the hill Louisville

22:10

is and 4 They've lost 4 1 -square

22:12

games against 2 playoff teams Miami could have

22:14

made the playoff and ACC arch rival Stanford

22:17

on the road. That's a pretty impressive season

22:19

for Louisville Meanwhile, Washington,

22:21

coming off of a national title

22:23

trip, employed Steve Belichick and that experience

22:25

inspired Bill Belichick to join the

22:27

ACC. The conference, Stanford plays in. Everything

22:29

revolves around Stanford. That's

22:31

it. to hear Steve Belichick voices again? It's

22:34

a squeaky. It's awesome. Hey,

22:37

guys! He's

22:40

awesome. I like

22:42

that you haven't piped enough like a

22:44

muppet. He's got a

22:46

beanie with a propeller Oh, it.

22:48

cute. Defensive coordinator Elmo.

22:50

Scrappy dude. What's

22:54

your defensive Steve has no

22:56

plans. Okay.

23:06

The she's Citrus Bowl! At

23:10

the same time. some McGatlin's because this is

23:12

always a good one. Man,

23:17

like things that have happened. to

23:20

make this game. of reality

23:22

in terms of what coaches ended up where,

23:24

if you told me five years ago,

23:26

you're like, yeah, Brett Belima he's gonna be

23:28

at Illinois. And then

23:30

Shane Beamer is gonna be the coach

23:32

at Carolina. And Carolina gonna look like the

23:34

scarier team. That's nuts. Like,

23:38

that's absolutely bonkers that these that

23:40

a quality bowl game. with

23:42

a good payout is occupied

23:44

by not only these two teams,

23:46

but these two coaches? Yeah. Yeah,

23:49

this really is like a

23:51

Probably the third best outside

23:53

the playoff Starring these teams.

23:56

Yes, these teams This pretty

23:58

good game. Like yeah, is we this

24:01

is we weren't joking drop out

24:03

Carolina into the the playoff want you

24:05

want play both of these games. of these

24:07

will do that shit. He'll be

24:09

like, shit. give you $340 and fare bus fare

24:11

a night at the Hampton Inn Inn

24:13

be like, be like done I did like when a

24:15

handful of SE, handful of of very loud, handful

24:17

of very loud, way, put it that

24:20

way, SCC people were complaining about the

24:22

playoff structure and like, this should been more

24:24

been teams, whatever, the general reaction seemed

24:26

to be, to be, but only if

24:28

you're referring to South Carolina. referring to South

24:30

That's the only team anyone was willing

24:32

to even consider agitating for. agitating

24:35

for. feel like South Carolina has

24:37

such has such big like. Like Like they're

24:39

on that like wrestling style

24:41

push to get over and everyone's

24:43

sympathizing with it for the

24:45

most part. the most part like This

24:47

would be a great finish to that to

24:49

a team that I don't think anybody

24:51

saw was going to be at 15,

24:53

much less with less with the the capability

24:55

of like beating Clemson and finishing with

24:57

10 wins. 10 That would not be

24:59

where I would have put them. I But

25:01

you know what? them, but you know

25:04

what? Lenora sellers proved wrong. wrong

25:06

Well, you know the easiest way to get

25:08

a wrestler over, and there's lots of proven

25:10

examples of this now, and in the past

25:12

is to have a really good entrance song.

25:14

And what South Carolina and in the past is to boop,

25:17

boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. The crowd loves

25:19

it, they love singing along with it is

25:21

what they do. Everywhere you go have? boop,

25:23

boop, boop. loves it. They love singing along with it is what they do.

25:25

They're doing the hand motions. Yeah they'll do

25:27

it all. They've got a great bit, like,

25:29

it turns to pits. do Yeah. Wait, what

25:31

are the hand motions a great bit. Like crazy stuff.

25:33

on You'd have to Yeah. Did you

25:35

have to say you do a little

25:37

sand a do sand? know how I don't

25:40

it's a hand I don't know this. It's a

25:42

hand pass our

25:44

style. style. Hell no! Columbia style.

25:46

Real fired up. real hot,

25:48

real hot and sweaty. Way too.

25:50

Active and engaged. A engaged. active

25:53

sandstorm sounds so

25:56

god damn uncomfortable. It's

25:58

a dirty Spider-man too. Yeah.

26:00

Fun fact about Kiffin pouting

26:02

because his nine and fact about,

26:04

uh, get in. According three team

26:06

didn't get in, schedule according to

26:08

both of the both of the

26:10

nine and three teams in

26:12

this game played harder So. Oh, that's,

26:14

I don't I don't even think that's particularly There

26:17

are some metrics where Ole

26:19

Miss comes out ahead of

26:21

Olmus comes but of, ahead of Illinois, otherwise

26:23

in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in,

26:25

in, they mean, Illinois' three losses. three

26:28

losses to Oregon. Makes sense. to

26:31

to Minnesota, Okay, that's kind

26:33

of fucked up. fucked up. And depends

26:35

date. It's Penn State. up in a

26:37

up the like. one like this way.

26:39

like this way. Yeah, but it's

26:41

also like we woke up kind know sleepy up

26:43

kind of sleepy that get you

26:45

get one of those on the

26:47

schedule if you're a if you're a team like

26:49

Illinois I lost So if Illinois hadn't lost to Minnesota,

26:51

um. Just just imagining a world where

26:53

they they finish ahead of Alabama and everyone

26:56

spends the weekend yelling, we should

26:58

have let Illinois we should have let Illinois in. And no

27:00

coach will argue with this. no coach will argue

27:02

with this, like, oh yeah, be like, hell

27:04

to we deserve to play for the

27:06

national title, title. You're games, two you're Illinois

27:08

and you'll be like, yeah I

27:10

don't care, he'll us matter. I don't care. Put

27:12

who? us in. We're We're who? Yeah, we're who? Yeah. Also,

27:15

this game this game is on ABC, like the

27:17

like the games were, so you know so you know

27:19

it's important. And And speaking of FCS, remember

27:21

the excellent FCS title game, Montana State North

27:23

Dakota State on January 6th. Yes, January

27:25

6th. That's the funny day. on And the

27:27

D3 final the day prior, Mount Union vs.

27:29

the North day. And Just final, know, we should

27:31

mention those games as well. South

27:33

Carolina, Illinois because, you be

27:35

disgusting. mention those games as well. a

27:37

half. Carolina, It's kind of we'll be I

27:39

think it will be be but fun.

27:41

fun. Yeah, it's a complimentary, when I say when

27:44

you're going to see you're gonna up

27:46

a ball they absolutely somebody huck up a

27:48

I'm talking about SMU Penn State

27:50

now. Also I realize I'm talking the Hill, SMU

27:52

up a ball. on the Sun Bowl, of

27:54

them, actually. hucking up a ball. Yeah,

27:56

this is yeah. This is one of those

27:58

games where I feel like. You go to

28:00

Costco and you buy all the

28:02

stupid all the have in stock first,

28:04

they But that's stock first, lot of

28:07

stupid this game. A lot of stupid They're delicious. They

28:09

Yeah, Yeah. I had to take the

28:11

whole the whole palate. Why doesn't the

28:13

doesn't bowl try to even to even like

28:15

slightly match what the tart is doing in

28:17

this same stadium like there is no

28:19

there is no, oh, it's it's time to eat all the

28:21

cheese at man. Or or anything. like... there's none of

28:23

it. not an- Yeah, they do. They're like, wait,

28:25

don't Cheez -It's on them. And I don't

28:27

remember which bowl started that. it's the them,

28:30

cheese I the whole point? which

28:32

bowl he die? that. Sure. Did

28:34

you have the giant cheese it? Did they?

28:36

sacrifice? Does toast it

28:39

before her eyes? for our sample,

28:41

but like they- You know, not I

28:43

don't remember. question I can, I

28:45

can maybe answer. I can maybe answer the

28:47

question from a resource standpoint, which is that

28:49

both of these are Florida Citrus sports games.

28:52

sports games. and that does

28:54

seem to suggest and some people seem

28:56

to suggest and Citrus

28:59

people that work at Florida listeners of

29:01

ours. Let us know if of ours. a

29:03

us know if there is like

29:05

a bitter war going between the Poptarts bowl teams

29:07

and between the Pop teams. Or

29:10

the Because teams. are put on by the

29:12

same concern, are put on by the same that

29:14

the this suggests that the ability is

29:16

there. they just think maybe they

29:18

just decided are for normal people. people. And

29:20

pop tarts are for are for the people

29:23

who the want their, who don't

29:25

want their. their, who don't snacks to

29:27

come with eyes. snacks to come

29:29

with eyes. Yeah, although this really does have.

29:31

does have. So a long time, the

29:33

Super Bowl had this really. really ironclad,

29:36

sticky form of marketing at the

29:38

end hey, it was like, hey,

29:40

you just won the Bowl. Where

29:42

Where are you going? I'm going

29:44

to Disneyland. Disneyland. Right, So we have

29:46

an MVP for this game. game. Yeah.

29:48

If we have an MVP for this game. day. I'm going

29:50

to the Poptarts bowl. the for the Cheeset bowl?

29:52

does the MVP say? you're, I think think you're

29:54

already down. you When you put the

29:56

mic in front of his face. face. Did they

29:58

they woke up paying the Cheesiest? Yes!

30:01

Yes! That's

30:03

it. For the record

30:05

Holly's mom That was Holly who answered that, not

30:07

me. Since that happened

30:09

sometimes. It really did. Make

30:12

me happier. over the sun. The

30:17

kinders Texas

30:19

bull The

30:21

what? Kinders. What's

30:23

that? Maybe it's the

30:26

the barbecue sauce It

30:28

is. Okay. Kinders.

30:30

I was hoping it was

30:32

kinder. Kinders? Kinders,

30:36

do you say it

30:38

Bavarian's finest. yeah, Yeah, his

30:40

kinders. That's very good

30:42

yeah. Time to get food

30:44

printed in American market.

30:46

Did I say it wrong

30:50

No, I'm just being an idiot. It's

30:54

a barbecue sauce for children! All

30:57

right, good night. You

31:00

look like you eat

31:02

some kinders' barbecue sauce! Kinders.

31:04

Kinderers... Or no. I

31:07

all the way from camper Texas.

31:12

Well, this, this, this bowl people

31:14

me. All a Paddle more,

31:16

more sirlo bar all the way

31:18

across the gun from Moxacire.

31:20

Jason, would you please say the

31:22

names of the two teams

31:24

in this bowl game in that

31:26

accident? The Balabarves. And Alice

31:28

you talk us. Oh

31:32

God. Sponsored by

31:34

barbecue sauce. I

31:42

like that both these teams are 8

31:44

and 4 because Baylor's really really happy about

31:46

being 8 and 4 And is really

31:48

sad about being 8 and 4 But

31:52

you're gonna see him in the national title the next year.

31:54

on the way. We're on the way. We're on the

31:56

way look out forever on the way Is this

31:58

the biggest comedic improvement? sponsor

32:00

because we're us that we're

32:02

jumping up from the tack. exact up from the is

32:04

that what this used to be?

32:06

Oh, is that what this used to be?

32:08

Huh, okay. Fun. The tax act

32:10

bowl. Yeah, like Baylor got like on a

32:12

got here on arc. Like they

32:14

had a wild first a wild

32:17

first half of the season

32:19

around because they they lost in a

32:21

row in a row. dead in

32:23

the and they were dead in the

32:25

water and everyone was writing Dave like

32:27

-in papers and then then They won

32:29

six in a row a row, because is

32:32

is random. The The Big 12 is

32:34

just a series of spinning barrels,

32:36

baby. Pull the trigger, see what

32:38

happens. the time, Brian Kelly lost five

32:40

games in a season. time Brian

32:42

Kelly lost was in season. It

32:45

was eight Notre Dame

32:47

year. Notre Dame you. you.

32:49

You know, know, Baylor's favorite

32:52

here a point. What if they told you

32:54

if I told you that at

32:56

the beginning of the year, the year?

32:58

That LSU would end up up hundred

33:00

dollars against Baylor? I'd be like, Baylor.

33:02

Be like, damn, Baylor must have ball, damn, oh

33:04

that's Baylor, that's awesome.

33:06

Hang on, what? They'll be playing

33:08

in a Texas bowl be, they'll

33:10

be playing in a Texas bowl

33:12

game. Wow, Baylor in the cotton ball.

33:14

That's amazing. annoy Brian annoy so Kelly so

33:16

much loses to today, because at the

33:19

at the It's gonna be like, it's

33:21

good game. You guys have a

33:23

great year and Dave will be like,

33:25

like, don't even know how we did

33:27

that, we It's just Brian, it's from such

33:29

doubt and my team such didn't and my

33:31

team I was studying the words know, Coach

33:34

Kelly, I was studying like, I of Marcus away

33:36

from this when, and he's like, oh, I left

33:38

Notre know, away from as Augustine

33:40

said, know, Brian, as St. Augustine

33:42

said, I, yes. Hey, I paste a sentence

33:44

from the bull website into the chat

33:46

here, can you say it? here, can you

33:48

say it in the voice? Because

33:50

there's some the voice. We're

33:53

only I don't only, I don't know

33:55

what, we're only calling it

33:57

it now. now because I'm that is a turn. Place

33:59

on our guard. Because there's some

34:01

alliteration at the the end here that I want to

34:03

see what you do with it. what

34:06

you do with it. Wow. Alright, good I.

34:08

Trite yourself to a free

34:10

country music concert at the

34:12

Rustic Diantown with the

34:14

callback kickoff concert

34:16

presented by by was what?

34:19

God. That's what they sound like in

34:21

Australia. That's what they sound like in

34:23

what they sound

34:25

like in Australia. they call

34:27

what they call

34:29

Kroger in Australia. Yeah, all

34:31

the mini mini Kroger Kroger's

34:33

is there. I say we just

34:36

keep trucking and

34:38

plow say we

34:40

just keep the wolfman

34:42

into the the Wrangler! That's

34:44

right. Penn State, Boise State, a

34:46

right. Penn State,

34:48

Boise State, a

34:50

one of those. one

34:52

of those. Quarterfinal,

34:54

right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, these are

34:56

new these is new. These are

34:58

new terms that we're learning here

35:00

as FBS football fans Penn State is one of the

35:02

Penn State is one of the

35:04

country's best defenses. Ashton Gente's on the

35:06

other team. That's the

35:09

schematic breakdown here. breakdown here That's

35:11

Abdul Carter versus Ashton

35:13

Gente is is a cool matchup like I'm

35:15

gonna look forward to watching that to

35:18

watching that It'll also be really

35:20

interesting to see if... to see if Boise

35:22

like if they slow Ginty down.

35:24

down they're going to have to get. have to get, to

35:26

do to do something, they're really, the night

35:28

they slow they jinty there. If they can slow

35:30

down, if they can, they can, have to pass

35:33

the have to pass the ball,

35:35

they sometimes have just have just declined

35:37

to do entirely. this year, year,

35:39

which is exactly what I would

35:41

do I I had that at Tailback. so. no

35:43

Like there, just saying you have to

35:46

figure out You might have to

35:48

figure out different ways to get the ball

35:50

other other than running back at nine yards every

35:52

carry. carry. Yeah, he's hit hit after running for one

35:54

then he runs for 80 more. 80 more. Yeah, it

35:56

feels like It feels like there are two possible

35:58

ways for this to go. and is based

36:00

on I have studied the tape or

36:02

like that it's more of like

36:04

there's a lot of games that end

36:06

up like one of these two

36:08

one is they mostly bottle him up

36:11

he breaks free for one or

36:13

two runs reminds everybody he's awesome but

36:15

you know Penn State's just too good,

36:17

too talented. And it's a little bit of

36:19

a bummer, but great job, Boise State.

36:21

The other version is we have a fiesta

36:23

pole Boise State is 3 -0 in these

36:25

games. And a stat you're gonna get

36:27

sick of is that Penn State is seven

36:30

and O in these games. so So

36:32

yeah, the winner of this game is the

36:34

all -time Fiesta God, King, Lord of all

36:36

Merriment. But yeah,

36:38

mean, we've seen it happen

36:40

before with this very team in

36:42

this very, very game was

36:45

it the same stadium at the time?

36:47

maybe oh anyway

36:49

the it the pink taco?

36:51

Yeah Penn

36:54

State's favorite by and a half.

36:56

the song, do the song. Brr, brr,

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there's definitely air on the moon, and then you fucking rock a

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joggers and a Are you kidding me? be!

38:59

Look at me, me! no water

39:01

on the water How moon! got this I

39:03

wave on the moon wave on the moon, is

39:05

exactly what a team from a what a would do

39:07

if it had to play a football game on

39:09

the walk around without a shirt. It's not even

39:11

a It's not even cold up here the we are

39:13

Let's walk how tough we are. I wish,

39:15

I wish even gravity! It's not even cold

39:17

up here. We've got tough, we are. I wish

39:19

there were there's no Fewer. South

39:21

Carolina. That's why so

39:23

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like, oh like, that's a god,

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Spencer, I have selected you as

42:24

the punished competitor for this edition

42:26

is a special year review of

42:29

sports more or less I'm going

42:31

to give you some simple questions where

42:33

you you just have to identify

42:35

which of the two in the

42:37

the category. I'm giving you you. Did

42:40

more of the thing will tell

42:42

you right will tell you right now, one

42:44

only one college football question in in it here. I'm

42:46

I'm gonna let you choose. you Do you want

42:48

that one first or do you want it last want

42:50

it last as your... sort of a in

42:52

case of emergency let's get on the

42:54

board or get long first. the Yeah,

42:56

let's get the embarrassing one out. right,

42:58

all right. Here's your college football

43:01

more or less the 2024. one out. All right.

43:03

All right. Here's your call

43:05

to a ball more or less

43:07

in 2024. Okay. Who scored more

43:10

the Florida State touchdowns in 2024?

43:13

The Florida Johnson. or

43:16

Iowa running back we're running back Caleb

43:18

Johnson. That that

43:20

is correct. Because to be fair,

43:22

to be fair, yes, Florida

43:25

State, smell be fair, to be fair,

43:27

yes, Floor State. bad. However, Kale

43:29

very bad, very stink, So

43:31

bad. not, that's

43:33

bad by any Johnson was awesome. So

43:35

like, that's not, that's bad by any

43:37

terms when But player scores more than

43:39

the whole team. But if one guy

43:41

were to do it, that's the least. Just

43:44

such as not scoring admittedly.

43:46

Florida State gets

43:48

special teams credit. three

43:50

touchdowns 23 touchdowns.

43:52

Florida State, 20. not enough,

43:54

certainly. right. Less, less.

43:57

Great, You've gotten on the

43:59

board. the board. right. Let's immediately go

44:01

hard. Spencer, who won more

44:03

games in the 2023, 2024

44:06

NBA season? The Chicago Bulls

44:08

or the Atlanta Hawks. They're

44:11

different teams. They're vastly different

44:13

teams. One of them has

44:16

won a lot of NBA

44:18

titles. Well, I just met

44:20

this year, Ryan. One of

44:23

them, however, was an NBA

44:25

cup. Semafinalist. That's right. Spencer

44:28

Ali will tell you neither

44:30

of these teams made the

44:33

playoffs in the 23-24 NBA

44:35

season. So which one won

44:37

more games across that span

44:40

covering? I'm gonna say the

44:42

Hawks. You're incorrect. The Chicago

44:45

Bulls 39 and 43, the

44:47

Atlanta Hawks, 36 and 46.

44:50

I don't feel bad about

44:52

that shit at all. This

44:54

is inadvertently a plug for

44:57

hand in the dirt. The

44:59

best NBA podcast out there.

45:02

That's right. Uh, Spencer! We'll

45:04

bring it back to football

45:07

for you, but not the

45:09

collegiate sort. Who has thrown

45:12

more picks so far this

45:14

NFL season? We're recording this

45:16

on Monday, December 23rd. Will

45:19

Lewis or Kirk Cousins? Well,

45:21

we'll let us didn't play

45:24

yesterday either. So that one

45:26

kind of even is out

45:29

a little bit. We're keeping

45:31

it fair. That's right. We'll

45:33

let us 12 interceptions. Kirk

45:36

is probably done playing, so

45:38

we'll see if Will can

45:41

catch up. Spencer, W.N.B.A. Question.

45:43

Who attempted more three pointers

45:46

in the 2024 W. W.N.B.

45:48

Cesar. It's incorrect. Caitlin

45:50

Clark did lead the league with 355

45:53

three-point attempts. Their whole team idiot. But

45:55

the Las Vegas Aces did attempt 21

45:57

more three points. I'm fine that margin

45:59

fine that enough to

46:01

enough like that's pretty good

46:04

good guess. And there are several W&B

46:06

A teams I The answer would have

46:08

been where the answer would I feel okay

46:10

about that. Your final question. okay about

46:12

that. a world final You've seen many things

46:14

over the course of your life and

46:16

you're quite old. things over the course of

46:19

your life and you're quite old. Olympics

46:21

with more gold medals?

46:24

with more gold medals? Host nation

46:26

France or hated Great

46:28

Britain. Britain. Oh, this is good. I'm

46:30

gonna say this is

46:33

good. Great Britain. gonna say host

46:35

Great Britain. I'm sorry

46:37

host medals to Great

46:39

medals to 14. Again, your

46:41

Tory apologism knows knows

46:44

no bounds. but you did

46:46

successfully get, let's see, two? Two out

46:48

get, Two of see. questions,

46:51

Two out of five. Two of these questions,

46:53

only the football questions. get me in me in

46:55

the hall of fame, and that's been my

46:57

goal all along. No, that's a different

46:59

sport. all name three players who are eligible

47:01

for the baseball hall of fame this year.

47:03

You're only going

47:05

at it right now.

47:08

to football. correct! players who are

47:10

eligible for the Baseball of

47:12

Fame puzzle Fame this

47:15

year. No. That's correct. Yeah, no. Correct.

47:17

great age comes defeated

47:19

by Baseball Hall of that,

47:21

as always, was more

47:23

or less presented

47:25

by PriceBix. I feel I

47:27

feel good about my misses there. Although the Great Britain

47:29

one, I Britain should I really should have just

47:31

gone with House wins more. But you know, know,

47:33

it does leave me to be like, know,

47:35

I can be like, know, I it's still coming

47:37

home. it's still coming home. It's still coming home got to be

47:39

a familiar sensation for you at the very

47:41

least. for you at the very just sitting

47:43

here, sitting here, breathing.

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