0:24

She was a fast machine, she

0:27

was the best damn woman

0:29

that I've ever seen. I

0:31

don't know the rest of

0:33

the lyrics, but. Tellin me

0:36

no lies, knockin me out

0:38

with those American thighs. Those

0:40

Irish thighs. Those thick

0:43

ol Irish thighs. Her Irish

0:45

thighs are smiling. I'm

0:47

saying. You know the new bop. Mine aren't smiling.

0:51

My crack's not smiling. Weeping.

0:55

Oh god. How are ya? I'm

0:57

good, how are you? I'm

1:00

so scared of you. I'm loving this

1:03

energy you're bringing to the table today. It's not scaring

1:05

me at all. Listen to me. Okay,

1:08

I may or may not have acquired a gummy.

1:11

Oh, in my defense, it's election night. If there was

1:14

any night Oh, I didn't know if you were gonna reveal that, so I wasn't gonna

1:16

say it. Oh, no, I'm gonna tell the people because if

1:18

I sound hysterical

1:20

the whole episode, they'll understand why. I'm

1:22

here for it. It's because all day I was so anxious.

1:25

And I wanted to puke

1:27

and cry and scream because it's the

1:29

night of the election and I need to be distracted.

1:32

And I just got so worked up, I was like, today is

1:34

the day she takes a gummy. And I can't

1:36

stop giggling. She did sit

1:38

in the, in the, the chair and go, Well, you

1:40

know. And that's what I knew. She

1:43

has hit. She has risen. She is

1:45

here. Do you know what? It will probably be a really

1:47

good episode, I hope. Yeah, I think

1:49

it's fine. Everyone has advices.

1:51

Do what you gotta do to get through the day. I don't give a shit. If

1:53

there was any day to disassociate.

1:56

She's currently crying right now. I don't know

1:58

what's happening. I'm scared. It's

2:01

not a crazy amount. I just think

2:03

I'm on one. I also bored

2:05

myself a cocktail.

2:07

So light them up, everybody. Do

2:09

what you gotta do. Get through the day. We're truly

2:12

just trying to survive. How are you? I'm

2:14

good. How are ya? We

2:16

already did that part. I know. You

2:18

asked me first already and I said, I'm good. How are you?

2:20

And then you just asked me again. Welcome

2:25

to this week's episode of Sipping with the Shannons.

2:28

We're cousins and every other week we sit

2:30

down, we sip on some wine, we talk

2:32

some shit, we have a good giggle. I'm Bridget

2:35

Shannon. And I'm Colleen Shannon. What

2:37

would you have just done if I just said, I'm Bridget Shannon? I feel

2:39

like you would have just been My brain would have melted

2:42

out of my ears. Uh,

2:44

I feel light as a feather. To be totally honest

2:46

with you, I feel so well. Life

2:49

is okay. Life is worth living. Is

2:51

it? Life is worth living.

2:55

No. No. No.

2:57

No, we gotta let that one go. Yeah. Just.

3:01

Just let it go. Let it happen. I'm here. I have a pulse.

3:03

And like a half a smile. And

3:05

half a smile. And like a half oiled

3:07

lip. So. Yeah. That makes sense.

3:10

Slicked back bun. I was literally just

3:12

gonna say bald eagle slicked back bun. I know you

3:14

were. That's how I feel whenever

3:16

I have a. What do you feel like? Please

3:20

describe that to the listener at home. It kind

3:23

of looks like I'm about to bonk like a chicken,

3:25

you know? And chicken's kind of like, mm, mm,

3:27

mm, like that. That's how I feel, like a bald eagle. Yeah, yeah.

3:29

Coming in. Definitely. Soaping in.

3:31

Bald eagle, America, election

3:33

night. Whenever

3:36

I agree with something, I keep forgetting to be like, no. I

3:38

think I went from saying 100 percent to this. Because

3:41

I just do this all the time. Okay, she's just putting

3:43

her again, they can't see us. Oh,

3:45

I was waiting for you to describe it. Because you always go, gang,

3:47

and then you explain it. Well, because they can't see

3:50

us. I know. Nothing

3:52

It's our thing, it's our bit, you know? No, it's nothing

3:55

like showing doing something visually

3:57

to people who can't. See

4:00

us. Or if we're talking about With no context,

4:02

she's not even saying anything out loud. If we're talking

4:05

about, like if I have something up on, like,

4:07

the computer, or like, the, uh, sorry, the

4:09

iPad. Your medium screen.

4:11

If I had something up on my iPad and I was like, oh, and this

4:13

person, you're like, you have to explain who we

4:15

are talking about! Well, you do mid sentence.

4:18

I feel like I've cut a lot of it out, but

4:21

she'll just, she will turn and she'll

4:23

just start talking about a person she talked about ten

4:25

minutes ago. And I'm like, you have to, who

4:28

is that? Who she be.

4:30

Who do she be? I don't know What have you done

4:33

the last two weekends? Nothing. No,

4:35

like seriously nothing. I rotted,

4:37

I watched a lot of things though. We can talk about that. Oh, let's talk

4:39

about the things that you're watching. 'cause I barely

4:41

watched anything. Wait, I have a question first. It's on my brain.

4:43

Okay. I was having this discussion at work

4:45

and in my group messages, it's like a hot topic at the moment. It's

4:47

actually so stupid, but I want your take on it. What

4:50

do you think is worse? Which I feel like I know your

4:52

answer. Wait, I have one for you. Oh my

4:54

God, that's so weird. I was gonna ask you something like this.

4:56

Okay. Sorry. Go, go, go. I got excited. No, no, you're fine. Somebody

4:59

go Which do you think is worse? Yeah.

5:02

In the same day, like you're, you don't

5:04

brush your teeth before you go to bed. Okay. That's just like, you don't brush

5:06

'em. Okay. You go to bed or I

5:09

say, I was in this outfit all day and I

5:11

just went home and got in bed in these clothes. What

5:13

do you think is worse? Okay, you

5:15

have issues with. Yes,

5:19

I'm a psycho about dental hygiene, however,

5:21

it won't get you sick to just not brush your teeth

5:23

for a day. It's gross, but you can have gum, you can have a mint.

5:26

You always feel like you have a layer, though, and that's

5:28

so gross. It's also like you're going to bed. Like, I'm talking about like going before

5:30

bed. But if you go to bed and you have your outdoor

5:32

clothes on, those germs, like that's in your

5:34

bed now. So that happens every single time.

5:37

But whereas teeth, it's like one weird

5:39

day, but you can do things around it. That's what I'm saying.

5:41

It really affects you. 100 percent the

5:43

clothes and the bed. Okay, cool. Same. That's what I said.

5:45

And like, everyone I worked with said, and then one of my friends

5:48

was saying this conversation got brought up because

5:50

she knows a few people that just like, brush their teeth one time

5:52

a day. And when she went

5:54

to the dentist, her dentist was like, oh, do you brush your teeth like,

5:57

twice a day? And she was like, of fucking course I do, what do you mean?

5:59

And the, her dental hygienist was like,

6:01

no, like, you'd be surprised, people do not brush their

6:04

teeth twice a day. And she was, she, she's like, I'm upset.

6:06

Like, I can't stop thinking about it. So that's why we

6:08

started talking about it. And I was like, to me, that's the equivalent

6:10

of, like, going to bed in your

6:12

day clothes. Like, the way you feel about it. Not

6:14

brushing your teeth. Oh, really? There have

6:17

been times where I'm tired and I just go to bed

6:19

or I'm really drunk. There have been times

6:21

where I haven't brushed my teeth at night. Yeah, no, same. But

6:23

I brush them in the morning. But, the morning is like

6:25

not even up for debate. I won't

6:27

do, it's the first thing I do every single morning. It

6:29

should be for everybody. It's not. My mouth feels like

6:32

it needs immediate attention when I wake up. So

6:34

yeah, that's all. Just a little thing that's gross. I,

6:37

listen. That's it. People

6:39

who don't go to the dentist and do that freak

6:41

me out. What are you doing? Where

6:44

is it going? Cuz it doesn't go away People

6:48

get it together. I couldn't I couldn't find floss the other

6:50

day at work and I was putting a safety pin in between I mean

6:52

not a safety pin, a paper clip in between my teeth. Oh god,

6:55

just put them in your bag You love, you're obsessed

6:57

with those. I know, I keep forgetting. You call them Christmas

6:59

trees in my house, right? The, not the Christmas

7:02

trees. That's what I have in my apartment. Yeah, yeah,

7:04

I love those. Great. I love the feeling.

7:06

Are you ready for the TikTok question

7:08

I had for you? Yeah, what is it? Would you rather

7:11

every song ever written

7:14

be sung by Pitbull? Okay. Or

7:18

that every song No.

7:22

You're so strong. Or

7:26

every song that's ever been sung

7:28

was a Pitbull song and everyone was just doing

7:30

a cover of it. So there's never

7:33

any other songs other than Pitbull songs.

7:36

Or does he sing every single song ever made?

7:38

He sings every single song ever made. Really?

7:40

Yeah. Cause I, I like the You need a

7:42

difference. I need a different, I need a cool beat. I don't

7:44

want like all the same fu all different people singing

7:46

the same fucking song. I agree with you, Colleen. Wow.

7:50

Wow. Kindred spirits.

7:52

My hands are clammy. Feel them. Stop. Alba.

7:55

Sorry. So violent. Tee

7:59

hee hee hee. Okay, what have you

8:01

been watching? Tell me everything. You guys. Dial

8:04

in. Buckle up. You

8:06

simply must, must, you simply

8:09

must stop everything you're doing and watch The Manhattan

8:11

Alien Abduction. Did you watch it yet? No.

8:14

It's like number 2 on Netflix right now. I know, I have,

8:16

I told you I haven't really been watching anything. It is.

8:19

I have no words you guys. So basically it's about this lady,

8:21

it's not, I'm not giving anything away don't worry. This lady

8:23

who Believes that she was abducted by aliens and

8:26

she was seen by like multiple people like

8:28

levitating outside of her window Naturally

8:30

in Manhattan. So like it was seen by a bunch of

8:33

including someone that worked for

8:35

the United Nations So it was like the FBI came to her house

8:37

to make sure she wasn't like a threat like it was like if like It's a

8:39

thing. Okay noted and so it's like

8:41

her side of the story the guy that she

8:43

was sought help

8:46

through that was like he believed in it and was like studying

8:48

it or whatever. And also the POV

8:50

of like a skeptic. And it's just like, it's

8:52

like, it's three episodes, but it's crazy.

8:55

And like, she's like their POV of how they

8:57

like fully believe that

9:00

aliens are obviously are real. I believe

9:02

that they're real, but in what capacity, I don't know. They,

9:04

they're like studying us. Like you just have to watch it. It's crazy.

9:07

Okay. So, well, I, I have

9:09

to watch it before I ask you your thoughts. Cause I want

9:11

to know, what did you leave feeling, but I want to know

9:13

after I watch it. Felt leaving,

9:15

like, yeah, if some, if you, this ended up being

9:17

a hoax, like, okay, but, like, I really don't

9:20

feel like it was, like, she had this issue where she

9:22

noticed one day after one of her dreams where she

9:24

was, like, taken, that her nose, like, was, like, fucked

9:26

up, and she took a photo and was like, why do I have

9:28

a bump on my nose? And she was like, that's weird, so her husband

9:30

was like, go to the doctor, like, make sure it's not, like, a tumor, whatever,

9:33

so they Go in and he's like you had

9:35

no you had surgery on your nose and she's like no I did not

9:37

And he was like you did you have an incision

9:40

and she's like no I I have not had

9:42

surgery on my nose and she was like, oh, I probably scratched

9:44

it And he said no that was from scalpel like you had

9:46

a foot like yes So it's just like things

9:48

like that that she's I mean she could be saying that but

9:50

I don't know You just gotta watch it you guys Good

9:53

lord. You know how I feel about alien stuff

9:55

though. No, I know. I, I, there's a, there's

9:57

a point. There's a line for me. Yeah, there's a line. Cool.

10:00

So you should watch it. Cool. I also watch that stupid movie

10:02

Time Cut. It's like number three on Netflix right now. Yeah,

10:05

you're all in on Netflix. Every. Thing,

10:07

you've Yeah, I went, I, I watch

10:10

has a Bish B. Yeah. I hyper

10:12

fix it. Im around, you know, bop b

10:15

bop, bop streaming service. Whoever's, uh,

10:17

streaming service I can steal. I'm on it, dude. They've

10:19

been kicking everybody out though. Like, I

10:21

share services with people and vice

10:24

versa. And it's, it's beginning.

10:26

That would be like, in this economy,

10:28

just let us have this. You'll

10:30

never hear the end of it. If that ever happens to me, that's the first

10:32

thing. I will come in guns blazing this week. If that

10:34

happens to me. Knock on. That's where you draw on the line. Knock

10:37

on the wood, I'm telling you. Anyway,

10:39

time cut some stupid movie about with some people

10:41

from like Ginny and Georgia and Outer

10:44

Banks. Just watch it It was it was like an easy like

10:46

whatever. You're not selling it. I I'm

10:48

shocked. You're like, just watch it I'm

10:51

not into time travel. Yeah, so it's like a

10:53

murder and she goes back in time like save her sister

10:55

I don't know. I give it like a four again. You're

10:57

not selling it, but you're telling me to watch it So

10:59

if you're watching it, I guess

11:01

don't how about that you want

11:03

me unwanted opinion there it is

11:07

Don't move. So good. Hated

11:09

it. I loved it. Why did you hate

11:11

it? Well, I will say I was

11:14

working and I had it on in the background

11:16

and just every time I looked up she couldn't move. And

11:18

so I was like. That's the point. I

11:20

know. That's the fucking point. But every time I just like picked my

11:22

head up she was just in a different position.

11:25

That is something that would upset you. It was the point of the

11:27

movie. Cause it's like an hour and

11:29

fifteen minutes in. She gets movement back.

11:31

No, I know. I did laugh out loud too.

11:34

I'm just not good with scary movies. It's not scary.

11:36

I laughed out. It's like a thriller.

11:40

She's so annoyed. Also, I'm surprised

11:42

you didn't text me to be like, yeah, that movie you told me to watch. I fucking hate

11:44

it. Yeah, I'm here to tell you today. That's why I

11:46

saved it. It was good guys. I

11:48

have hair today. No one

11:50

part I laughed genuinely out loud. She's

11:53

in like a field. And there's a guy

11:55

mowing along. Oh, when she almost got clipped

11:57

by the lawn. She's bigger than it. She

12:00

was laying down. And she

12:02

was taller than it. I'm like, you

12:04

didn't think he was gonna see. No, no,

12:06

that was just the POV. She

12:09

wasn't actually. The John Deere

12:11

was bigger than her. Oh, it

12:13

looked like the size of her. And so

12:15

I couldn't stop laughing. No, because it's like zoomed in

12:17

on her like head, her eye. So it's like what she's

12:19

seeing. It wasn't actually that small. Okay,

12:22

well that makes me feel Yeah, I would know. I was like I'm

12:24

a producer and a director, so Oh, perfect.

12:26

You did set up this room, so good for

12:28

you. Set designer. But

12:30

other than that, I hated him so

12:33

much, obviously. I mean, obviously, I loved him in American

12:35

Horror Story, though. There was a moment

12:37

I nearly texted you on site, as

12:39

you mentioned, to yell at you, because I thought

12:41

it was going to end one way. And luckily,

12:44

things Oh, did you think she was going to die when she was drowning? We're trying

12:46

not to spoil it. That's just so

12:49

vague. Did you think that she was gonna die when she

12:51

was drowning? That's just like that. You can't

12:53

spoil it for everybody though who hasn't seen

12:55

it. Well, she could have died ten minutes later doing something

12:57

else. They don't know

12:59

that. They haven't seen it. They'll just have to watch

13:01

it. Yes,

13:04

Colleen. Yes, I did. Uh,

13:06

no, I, come on. You know better than that. And I was like, if she

13:09

made me watch this fucking movie. No.

13:11

Anyway. Of course not. Continue. Woman of the Hour.

13:13

Did you at least like that one? Of course I watched

13:15

Woman of the Hour. I watched

13:18

it directly after the Menendez Brothers,

13:20

which I don't recommend back to

13:22

back to back. No, you probably, because you're like like

13:24

that, you'd be like down in the dumps. Yeah, I was

13:26

like, oh, I gotta watch

13:28

Dairy Girls. Like, I gotta watch some great

13:30

British bake off now. And

13:33

so, it just made me sick

13:35

to my stomach. I was just sick to my stomach the whole time.

13:37

But I thought Anna Kendrick directed it. I thought

13:39

she was amazing. The

13:41

fact that it's a true story is wild

13:45

and how on the show he just

13:47

seems so normal and nice.

13:50

They always do. And they always, the part

13:52

in the parking lot where he tells her to

13:54

say her number is like,

13:56

it's every woman's worst nightmare. It's

13:59

every woman's worst nightmare. And there's a part

14:01

too, like in each of their

14:03

stories, and I'm absolutely not victiming blaming

14:05

here, they know something is off. And

14:08

they're, they're just either being polite or they're like,

14:10

Oh, well, he seems a nice guy up to this point.

14:12

Like, even the benefit of the doubt, like we

14:14

were trained to just be polite. Yeah. That's

14:16

where their phrase fuck politeness came from. And

14:19

it's just like, you don't actually owe niceness

14:21

to anyone. You don't have to be nice, but they're

14:24

trained to do that and they just shake it off and

14:26

then it ends horribly. But that

14:28

girl who's like, Hey, things got crazy.

14:31

Do you want to go back? I'm like, imagine.

14:34

Imagine! No. It's so

14:36

scary! Like, she should have been, like, she just

14:38

woke up and was like, that was wild. That

14:40

was, last night got wild. Do

14:43

you want to go home now? And he's like looking at her

14:45

and she's just like, everything's fine.

14:48

But sure, get me out of this desert and take me home. But sure,

14:51

let's stop at this gas station. I

14:53

have to pee. Or he has to pee. Anyway,

14:56

I did really like it, I just watched it

14:59

at a tough, you know what I mean?

15:02

I hear you. Do you want to talk about, what was that show we called,

15:05

uh, we watched about A Wrinkle in Time?

15:07

What's it called? Sorry? The

15:10

one we watched on your couch. A Wrinkle

15:12

in Time? Is a movie with like, Reese

15:15

Witherspoon and what?

15:18

What is it called? The show with the woman that

15:20

was frauding everybody on Reese Anatomy. Anatomy

15:23

of Lies. Where did I get a wrinkle in time? I

15:25

have no idea. That's a

15:27

wild transition. And

15:29

the fact that you were annoyed, I didn't know what that meant.

15:32

Anatomy of Lies, Wrinkle in Time.

15:35

They rhyme. Live

15:38

your life. Lies and time don't

15:40

rhyme. Times! Times!

15:43

Times! Fucking dies! Anyway,

15:46

it's so crazy. It's

15:48

one of those shows that now I

15:51

keep thinking about it like once a week i'll be like

15:53

that was fucking crazy It really

15:55

stuck with me that woman is so mentally

15:57

unwell in that poor

16:00

mom Has she not been through

16:02

enough? Finch, can you go fuck

16:05

off somewhere else? It's always the people

16:07

that are most vulnerable. I did

16:09

watch The Love Is Blind reunion finally. Okay,

16:12

I don't watch Love is Blind, so I don't know. I know, but I just want to

16:14

tell the listeners because last episode I was like

16:16

ripping it to shreds because there was no one to root for.

16:18

I am in fact happy for the couples. There

16:20

are two couples that like quote unquote

16:22

made it. I am happy for them, but

16:25

good lord. There was some redemption, but

16:27

just like do better. Do better. And

16:29

they're already a new season coming out, like they're

16:31

churning these motherfuckers out. Yeah,

16:33

no. It's crazy. It's not the vibe for me.

16:35

It's not the vibe. No. Anyway.

16:38

No. Just, just no. People are fuckin

16:40

weird, man. What did you actually do over the weekend?

16:42

I didn't even ask you that. Oh. I

16:45

had fun. Okay. And.

16:48

I.

16:50

Wait, we have two weekends to cover. Oh

16:52

shit. What did you do the weekend before that? It was Halloween.

16:55

No we didn't. Yes we did. Are

16:57

you sure? I'm positive. Cause we do bi

16:59

weekly now. We do. What did I do

17:01

for Halloween? Wow, apparently I put my batty brain on

17:03

today. Yeah,

17:05

I left it on Mars.

17:08

What did I do? I don't remember what I did for Halloween

17:10

to be honest. I'm pretty sure I kept it very low key.

17:13

I can't remember anything right now. I don't remember where your location was.

17:15

Oh, cool. I don't remember. You weren't stalking

17:18

me that night? You had better things to do?

17:20

No, I just, I know I noticed. I probably took note of it and

17:22

then I forgot. Okay, great. Then, this

17:24

weekend that just passed, what did I do? I went

17:26

to a barbecue on Saturday with a bunch of my friends

17:29

and it was super fun and everyone brought babies

17:31

and I am down with a baby bjorn.

17:33

That, strap that little baby on to me.

17:36

And let's walk around this party. You can

17:38

walk around and it's the one where they face out.

17:40

They can face in and like sleep if they want,

17:42

but they can face out. So her little

17:45

arms were out my My really

17:47

good friends just had a baby. Her name is Dua.

17:49

She is the most beautiful child I've ever seen. And

17:51

she showed up in this, like, little pink sherpa.

17:54

Pop off, Dua. And they were like,

17:56

Bridget, do you want to use the Baby Bjorn? And I was like, yeah,

17:58

I do. And so they popped her in the front,

18:00

hands free, both of us. I

18:02

was walking around the party with a, with a drink

18:04

in my hand, saying hi to everyone. Dua

18:07

just hanging out with me. Did that make you

18:09

feel anything? I was Like what

18:11

maternally no, okay. I

18:14

love being a not truly. Okay.

18:16

I have always loved babies and have been

18:18

good But it doesn't make me like want

18:20

to be a mom. No. Yeah, I was like No,

18:23

I mean it what it melted my heart.

18:25

Okay, but kicking it over is a stretch.

18:28

Okay, and then I was like Like

18:31

booty bumping with her she was great. She's

18:34

the cutest but it's so funny barbecues

18:36

now are like Babies and dogs

18:39

and everyone has a home and

18:42

talks about like, I don't

18:44

know, redesigning their kitchens and

18:46

I'm over in the corner like I

18:49

actually watched my friend in a conversation the other day and I

18:52

Watched from afar and then afterwards

18:54

I said what what were you just talking about? Like

18:56

what could this group of people possibly talking about

18:58

and she was like the fucking economy. It was terrible

19:00

Like what what how when did we get here?

19:03

How did we get here? Like, if

19:05

someone came up to me and started talking about the economy, I

19:08

would start drooling. And

19:11

probably saying the R father in Spanish.

19:13

And then I'd run away. Like,

19:16

what? In this economy?

19:18

In this economy. Sorry,

19:20

I just screeched. Anyway, that's okay.

19:22

I'll adjust your volumes. Thanks. Then

19:25

I went to Erin's. Went and

19:27

saw the kiddos. Hung out with them all day. They're

19:29

the friggin best. That's cute. And

19:31

here we are. I did something else, too. Oh,

19:34

and I had a Chinese food night for, actually

19:37

Friday, I had a Chinese food night with Jessie

19:39

and Oren. We just ordered a bunch of Chinese

19:41

food and watched like British shows and

19:43

just gabbed and yapped because Jessie's

19:46

about to give birth in three weeks. So

19:48

she just was like, I want to lay. And

19:50

so that's what we did. We laid. As she should. As

19:52

she should. I'm like, I'm coming to you. We're

19:55

ordering food. We're not going anywhere. We

19:57

actually have been going on walks recently. It's great. At the

19:59

reservoir down the street. So nice.

20:03

That's when you know you're old. I actually said that to

20:05

her the other day. We were on one of our walks and

20:07

the foliage was absolutely stunning.

20:10

Like it was a red tree and an orange tree. Like it

20:12

was. Okay. First of all, stop

20:14

saying that with disgust. The

20:16

foliage is foliage ing and

20:19

you're rude and you're fucking rude. Okay.

20:22

And so like, what did you do with your picture? How dare

20:24

you? Did you post it? Second of all, I didn't take

20:26

a fucking picture. So

20:28

get your Gen Z

20:31

ass out of my face, and if I want

20:33

to take a picture of foliage Colleen, I

20:35

will do it without judgment. And show it to

20:37

who? Sorry. Sorry, you're better

20:39

than foliage. You think you're better?

20:42

You think you're better

20:44

than Boston, New

20:47

England, Fall, Quintessential,

20:50

October, November, Foliage? Medford

20:52

Foliage? A little bit. How? First

20:54

of all Sorry,

20:57

we were First of all, I hate you. Second

21:00

of all, there's battery acid running

21:02

through your veins. And you should be ashamed

21:04

of yourself. That's so true,

21:06

dude. Anyway. Anyway.

21:13

I was saying that you know you're old because

21:15

you start talking about the foliage like

21:17

you're on a walk Because it's warm

21:19

that day and you meet up and then

21:21

you walk around you go. Oh my gosh Look at how beautiful

21:24

this foliage is. That's when you

21:26

know, I didn't take a photo Colleen But

21:28

now now I'm going to on purpose because

21:30

you're a bitch. Anyway, what were you

21:34

saying? That's

21:37

like my equivalent to like If

21:39

you're just gonna take a picture of a random tree and, like, post it, like, cool, great.

21:42

But, like, the the weekly, if not monthly,

21:45

baby posts. I know we've talked about this

21:47

before, but I just need to bring it up again. And it's, like, them

21:49

laying on a mat. And, like, the moms Dead

21:51

dead behind the eyes. Even asleep, I

21:53

don't fucking know. Cross eyed. And it's, like,

21:56

it loves, uh, speaking and walking

21:58

and, like, fucking, like I'm

22:02

sorry, and it's like on

22:04

the clock and it's like on the three because they're three months old. Yeah,

22:06

of course. Please tell me he's like 36 months

22:08

old. Keep doing it. Colleen.

22:11

Sorry. I don't like it. That's such a hater. I

22:13

just don't like when people do that. Like, I'm here to see

22:15

your baby. Like, that's cool. Not

22:18

every month on the dot and then someone had the audacity

22:20

the other day to be like, Sorry, we're a few minutes late. We've been, I

22:22

mean, a few days late. We've been super busy

22:24

or like this one's been busy and on the go. It

22:27

can't walk. She

22:29

is booked and busy with playtime.

22:32

She can't make her own appointments. What

22:34

do you mean? Who's calling her? She doesn't have a cell

22:36

phone. I just said it. You

22:39

do this all the time, by the way. Do I? You

22:42

didn't know I can't wait till listeners hear

22:44

this. I can't I this

22:46

is a perfect example I

22:48

keep calling Brianna's baby in it to Colleen.

22:51

Yeah, you do this all the time

22:53

every time we're talking about children You're like, what

22:55

did it do? You

22:57

were just talking about in our last episode how you might

23:00

want children And only

23:02

referred to children as it You

23:05

don't remember that Ever

23:07

calling a child in it. I mean,

23:09

yeah, I just had a call brianna's baby.

23:11

Yeah, but pre pre pregnancy.

23:13

Yeah, that's true It hasn't been birthed yet. It's just like a bean in there

23:16

or something. I don't know You have to be the day. I'm

23:18

like, what is it? And she's like it's a kumquat today What

23:20

the fuck does that mean? Yeah, they have an app

23:22

nowadays and you can go on and see what size

23:24

Like, I don't want to know if some shit's growing a leg.

23:26

Like, I don't want to know that. Yeah, it's called the miracle

23:28

of life, Colleen. It's not a fucking miracle.

23:30

Read a book. Grow up. They're all

23:33

lying to us. What? The

23:36

government. It goes all the

23:38

way to the top. We

23:40

are so unhinged today. I

23:46

really needed this, though. I was so anxious

23:48

earlier, I almost puked three times. Can

23:50

I please tell you about my Halloween experience? Fine!

23:53

God, why are you yelling at me?

23:56

I don't know. Fuck! I don't know, but it feels fucking

23:58

good. Just

24:00

kidding. Halloween. Dobby slayed the

24:03

day away. It

24:05

was stunning, Colleen. Thank

24:07

you. It was, I'm so

24:09

proud to know you after seeing that

24:11

costume. Really? No. People were

24:13

trying to rip my ears off. It was like some shit.

24:15

Back the fuck up. That's Dobby assault.

24:18

There was another Dobby at the party. Okay,

24:20

well that's Colleen, honey. It's been around

24:22

for fuckin 30 years. No,

24:24

not in my house. Nope. You

24:27

don't think you would ever see another

24:29

Dobby for the rest of the night? Respectfully, another

24:31

Dobby? No! In like a, in,

24:33

in selfie where like people are wearing their clits

24:35

out? Like no, why would I see another goddamn Dobby?

24:40

Everyone's bedazzling Clidia for

24:42

the night? Also, mind you, it

24:44

was the, uh, Weekend before Halloween,

24:46

so it was like the 26th, the 27th, whatever, which I'm,

24:49

I'm down for Halloween before Halloween, not after,

24:51

and like, it's just like, sorry,

24:53

like, why are we doing, it's like November 3rd. Okay, let's

24:56

wear costumes. No, we're not doing that. Okay.

24:58

We're gonna do it. Oh, okay. I heard

25:01

you. I'm not arguing

25:03

with you. But I actually, the person

25:05

that I saw, he just had the mask on, but let me tell you,

25:07

I cut the ears and the nose off my mask and I glued

25:10

it to my face, so who's the real winner here? Obviously

25:12

you. Obviously. It's no contest. Obviously. You committed

25:14

and he didn't. My You half assed it. Oh,

25:17

what I was gonna say was we, my, a friend of

25:19

mine rented out Tom English's in South Dakota. It's like a

25:21

cash bar divy. Yes. That's fun. Yeah,

25:23

but we had like a section of it and like other

25:25

people weren't celebrating Halloween. So I was just

25:27

Dobby surrounded by actual attractive men, not

25:30

in costume. Oh,

25:34

like again, did you attract the right person

25:36

though? Because you didn't attract

25:39

any of them. They were horrified. It was like eyes.

25:41

Okay, then they all were trash. But also you don't think

25:43

that's funny. I was trying to like run to the bathroom

25:45

at the back of the bar and all you would see would be like my head and I

25:47

would dart. Oh my God. Good

25:49

Lord. And

25:52

I was going outside to like, obviously like smoke a drunk

25:54

cig as Dobby, which is just hilarious

25:56

and I would go around the corner and I would be like, I'm just gonna pee out

25:58

here because it was just like convenient. Yeah.

26:00

I had little slip on. Oh,

26:03

I saw that. And they, I peed in my shoes

26:05

like multiple times. It's, we literally

26:07

can't post it on Instagram or we'll both get

26:09

yelled at. No, I don't think so. There's nothing revealing in it. It's

26:12

very personal. You can't

26:14

lie. Like, you can't hide what you're doing,

26:16

though. Okay, yeah, that's true. And it's in a public place, which

26:18

I think is illegal. That's true, so And we don't

26:20

like toallegedly. Yeah.

26:22

So this all allegedly happened. Pish posh.

26:25

My dress, thoughcomfiest dress I've ever worn.

26:27

My potato sack. Mmm. Could've worn that everywhere.

26:30

Need to tell you about the Oh,

26:32

Fiona was Lord Voldemort, also. The poor girl,

26:34

she has the most sensitive skin. She had, like, ripped a layer

26:36

of her skin off. No! I

26:40

was going to town on that. No!

26:43

So much glue. And then we also, of course, we had a Hagrid,

26:45

we had a Lord Voldemort, and then we had a Harry Potter. Somehow

26:48

Olivia looked the worst as Harry Potter. Not sure how

26:50

that happened, but. And

26:52

I had ears glued to my head. Also

26:54

was deaf with those on my ears. Could not hear.

26:56

It was so funny though, all of you.

26:59

Couldn't hear anything. You can't hear anything on

27:01

a good day. And we didn't tell anybody either. So like arriving, everyone's

27:03

like, I'm confused. Cause we have like, we have a

27:05

Dorothy. We have a chef's

27:07

kiss costume. We have you know, Sandy

27:09

and Danny. And we have, Hoggy's

27:12

Hoes. Hoggy's Hoes. Hoggy's

27:14

Hoes. So we decided to leave, myself,

27:16

uh, Harry, and Lord, Lord Voldemort.

27:19

We decided to leave to go to my friend's house, because he was having

27:21

a Halloween party, and he had texted me prior in the night and was like,

27:23

oh, why don't you come by? And I was like, so no, because

27:25

I, I don't know any of these people, and I can't

27:27

come through as Dobby. But obviously, after a lot of

27:29

tequila, I'm like, yeah, I'll be right there! I

27:32

am unwell at this point in

27:34

time because the party started at 6. Naturally.

27:36

So, like, by midnight, she is And

27:38

also, like, wanted some Lights are on, no one's home. Needed some liquid

27:40

car No, not even that bad. Like, I just, like, I don't get, like,

27:42

legless or anything. Like, I just am, like, wow,

27:45

you know? Oh, I know. I am fully aware.

27:47

I Was obviously overcompensating

27:49

at the beginning too, because like, I need some confidence to be wearing

27:51

a potato sack, like, come on now. Yeah, we gotta

27:53

take a few shots So we're taking a few shots. So

27:56

I was, probably should have gone home. we

27:58

begin our venture. the theory is,

28:00

that I stopped to pee, and I think I left

28:02

my shorts there. Cause I had shorts on

28:04

underneath my dress. Okay. Because

28:07

You were bottomless? I believe so. You poo baired

28:09

it? Apparently. And I lost You poo baired

28:11

it? I lost, I lost I lost my equilibrium.

28:14

And I don't usually do that. That's a tough thing to do after

28:16

you lose your underwear? Or

28:18

your shorts? Oh, you think this is bad? It gets worse. So

28:20

I, I fall, ignore the shorts comment. I'm

28:22

just adding that into the mix. That'll come back later. Got

28:25

it. But I do fall over. And I have to

28:27

be helped up. And I passed where I

28:29

fell on my walk on Sunday. And

28:31

it's fully slanted. I'm like, you guys made

28:33

fun of me for falling as if I'm some, like, heathen.

28:36

That was cruel. It was a full, like

28:39

slanted Hill. And I lost my, I look

28:41

at what I had on for footwear, like. And there was

28:43

pee in there, I was sliding around, like, it was my Oh,

28:45

Colleen. My equilibrium was off. Thank god

28:48

you're obsessed with showering when you get home from places.

28:50

Because the amount of times you take off your shoes

28:52

and piss in public, you're a heathen. You're

28:55

a fucking heathen. You're

28:58

too old for this. I agree. Completely

29:01

fucking agree. Talk to my anxiety that I have,

29:03

I'd say. I really don't do it that often, okay guys?

29:05

So we get to where we need to go. My friend lives

29:08

above the Taco Bell in Southie. So,

29:10

we Or in Taco Bell. I didn't

29:12

listen. This is where I've lost it. I don't really know. But we're

29:14

in Taco Bell. And Fiona,

29:16

obviously people are staring. Hello. I

29:19

mean, I would assume. Because no one is dressed in costumes. Correct.

29:21

Except for us. Because it's the, quote unquote, weekend

29:23

before. So we are

29:25

Dobby and Lord Voldemort

29:27

fully ordering in Taco Bell. I

29:31

must have, I couldn't figure out how my friend

29:33

knew I was downstairs because all of a sudden he just appeared.

29:35

And I rechecked my text and I was like, we

29:38

are at tacos, laying sleep, like absolute

29:41

nonsense, which I haven't done since high school. Like who

29:43

texts like that when they're drunk? Just put the phone away. And

29:45

so all of a sudden he appears out of nowhere. And

29:47

and they were eating their Taco Bell in the corner and I'm like, wow,

29:50

as Dobby. It was just like, not a good time. All

29:53

you can hear is the Taco Bell going, Order

29:55

for Lord V! And then she

29:57

just gets in and she's

29:59

like, Yep, yep. And she's

30:05

still in full cosplay.

30:09

Full costume. And apparently

30:11

I flashed my whole Poussoir

30:15

to the entirety of Taco Bell. What do you

30:17

mean? I don't know. My friend, my guy friend was

30:19

like, Jesus, you showed everyone your taco!

30:22

Dobby whipped out the Poussoir.

30:26

Like fully. What do you mean? I don't

30:29

know. I don't know the context in which I did it, but I was

30:31

told I unveiled her. What do you mean you don't

30:33

know the context? But my whole thing was, oh no I didn't,

30:35

I had shorts on. Oh,

30:38

no you didn't. So I must have left them somewhere.

30:40

Kind of upset. What type of underwear did you have

30:42

on? None. That's the point. So

30:44

when I unveiled the potato sack, I unveiled the

30:47

Poussois too. Lydia!

30:49

Yeah, and I went right upstairs. Go to bed,

30:52

Lydia. And like, And then I, I

30:54

did go to bed. God bless Fiona. I was

30:56

screaming at her from McDonald's and tried calling a man

30:58

and she's like, you are dressed as Dobby. He is not coming

31:00

here. You cannot have this man

31:02

come here when you look like this. He's

31:05

like one of my friends I've, for like a decade. It's really

31:07

not that weird, but. I know, but of all the times

31:09

to get confidence. Well, I do it

31:11

all the time, to be honest. He does it to me too, but I

31:14

just, we were giggling. Cause

31:16

he's like, no, like I'm not, I was like, it's okay.

31:18

You know, Fiona's like, you're dressed as, as Dobby.

31:21

It's for the greater good. I don't think it's, this is going

31:23

to fly. Yeah, I was just laying there waiting

31:25

for McDonald's and she's like taking my makeup off. Do

31:27

you want to know what I do? Wait, you went to Taco Bell

31:29

and McDonald's? I don't need to, I don't eat Taco Bell.

31:32

So you had to make two stops? No, we ordered

31:34

it. Oh, okay. I was like, please, please

31:36

don't tell me you left. I think they got a taco.

31:38

I don't know. So you went

31:41

to Taco Bell and didn't eat Taco Bell? I have

31:43

really no, very low recollection from Taco Bell.

31:45

And I'm not a black router. I blacked, I browned out. Browned.

31:48

It sounds a little black. No, it's a black

31:50

ish. No, because I remember Matt coming down and being like, Come on, let's go upstairs.

31:52

And then me being like, Lord, V, you know?

31:55

I don't know. Whatever. Not the point. That was my only Halloween

31:57

that I had to, that's the only thing I had to share. I did see a thing

31:59

the other day though that like, I'm going to send it to you, but it really

32:01

made me feel like, you know. Some type of way?

32:04

Yeah, like I saw a thing that said a blessing as big

32:06

as your back is on its way. Oh.

32:10

So what do we think that? I think we

32:13

are in for, for a treat. Okay.

32:15

I think that's the only thing I can mean. What kind of treat?

32:18

That I don't know. Okay. Maybe we can manifest

32:20

that. Okay. That's fine. Cool.

32:23

Okay. Okay, one show I did watch

32:25

that I loved, Agatha Allalong, Katherine

32:28

Hahn, Aubrey Plaza, Patti

32:31

LuPone, the icon that is Patti LuPone,

32:33

I don't care if you don't watch Marvel, you don't have

32:35

to. It makes more sense if you watch it. It

32:38

is so good. It is so good. The cast

32:40

is absolutely incredible. Cannot recommend it

32:42

enough. Disney plus. Shout

32:45

out. Amen. We're winding

32:47

down to the end of Dancing with the Stars. How are we

32:49

feeling? I haven't watched it in like two weeks. I'm

32:51

behind. Oh. I will

32:54

say, Miss, Miss Girl, she's won

32:56

me over. Who's Miss Girl? Alona.

32:59

Alona Mar. You like her now?

33:02

Okay, good. I'm very, very happy to hear that.

33:04

Big fan now. She's amazing. Her and Ellen.

33:06

I never wanted to stop. I love her humor.

33:09

So I'll say that's probably one of the very few times that I've said something

33:11

and said it's a hill I'll die on and then retracted and said hill.

33:14

I'm glad that's the one you, you picked. I didn't say that was a hill

33:16

though, but I did, I did feel strongly. You were, you kind of doubled down.

33:19

So I'm glad you're retracting your statement. I can't make my

33:21

wrongs. Okay everybody, are we ready for the topic of the

33:23

week? Yeah. It's one that

33:25

Colleen picked, so you know it's gonna be weird.

33:29

Anyone wanna guess? No?

33:32

No guesses? No guesses? It's

33:34

fucking reincarnation, because

33:36

Colleen is unhinged.

33:39

It's just something that's kind of piqued my interest

33:41

for a while, okay? It's a hyper fixation.

33:44

Oh, can I tell you what my new hyper fixation is

33:46

to make for lunch? Yeah. So you know how I

33:48

love a rotisse chick, right? I go to

33:50

Wegmans, my RC purse. Do you ever put them in the

33:52

fridge or they got to be fresh RC? So

33:54

I eat immediately when it comes home.

33:56

I go around lunch or dinner time so I can

33:58

eat it for dinner. And then I take all

34:00

the rest of it off while it's hot and put it in the

34:02

fridge and save the rest of it for later. But I

34:05

deconstruct when I get home. I

34:07

don't go, I don't leave it. in its full

34:09

form. Does that make sense? Yes. So

34:12

I get a rotisse chick, I eat the parts,

34:14

and then I put all the rest in the fridge.

34:16

I then chop it up, okay? Chop,

34:18

chop, chop, chop, chop. Then I

34:21

take a red onion and I chop, chop, chop, chop, chop.

34:23

And then I take some lettuce and then I take some

34:25

tomato and then I take some avocado

34:28

and bacon and mayo and

34:30

I make a chicken salad extravaganza

34:33

and I put it in a wrap. And I eat it for

34:35

lunch. Gorgeous. Is that not the most

34:37

gorgeous thing you've ever heard? She does sound stunning.

34:40

So I get four meals out

34:42

of one rotisserie chicken. Every single one of them

34:44

makes me out of this world happy. Say

34:48

less. Actually, it might be more than four. That

34:50

thing lasts me a while. I mean, I could fuckin eat a whole

34:52

one. Oh, I, oh, that back

34:54

in my day. Back in my day?

34:56

You want to talk about wide backs? Your

34:59

girl loved an RC right

35:01

over the sink. Throw it over your

35:03

shoulder. Elbow deep. Elbow deep

35:05

in this RC. I

35:07

mean. This bag. There's no other way to do it. I used

35:10

to open the bag, so this

35:12

is, I have a problem. It's

35:15

okay to admit, it's a safe place here. It's

35:17

okay. I sound like a fiend.

35:20

I open the bag sometimes when I get home

35:23

so the steam comes up so I can eat it faster.

35:25

That's normal. Is that normal? Yes, that's

35:27

fucking normal. I do that with all food. It made me really

35:29

sad the other night though, I made a pizza and I couldn't eat it

35:32

fast because it was too hot. That's so

35:34

fucking annoying. I'm like, I'm so hungry. Do you want

35:36

to know what I do? Sometimes. What do you put in the

35:38

fridge? I put my Annie's

35:40

in the fridge all the time. That's what Erin does for Danny,

35:42

my five year old nephew. Because

35:45

when it comes out it's too hot. He wants it. I like when it hardens

35:47

a little bit though. It's just like the perfect texture.

35:49

It congeals. For my, my acoustic ness. Oh

35:54

my goodness gracious. So before we get into reincarnation,

35:57

I must ask you, do you actually believe in it? Yeah,

36:00

oh my god, yeah. Of course. You do? Yeah, do you?

36:02

I don't know. Well, maybe my

36:04

story will make you feel otherwise. I mean, mine

36:06

really shook my shit up. Yeah, mine. Like, you picked

36:09

this and I kinda eye rolled. I

36:11

Shook my shit up. Puh

36:13

lease. But you know what I mean? You pick very

36:15

niche. Yeah, things that like are And I'm

36:17

like, okay, Colleen. Because it's just like, could

36:20

it be real? Yeah, you like the

36:22

mystery of it all. Yeah, and you hate

36:24

unsolved anything. That's correct. Do

36:27

Uh, who were you in your last life? What were you

36:29

doing? What type of thing

36:31

were you in your past life? was?

36:35

Donkey from Shrek? Shrek? Oh

36:38

my god, she said

36:40

this thing the other day that was like, I'm

36:43

trying to be mysterious, but this is my personality.

36:46

And it was a picture of Donkey and

36:48

Sid the Sloth next

36:50

to each other. It

36:52

was so funny.

36:54

It was so funny. I

36:56

don't know. Honestly. A cigarette.

37:00

Probably. No, you mean a person? like. Do

37:03

you mean, do you want me to pick someone we all know?

37:05

Do you want me to pick just like a random,

37:07

what do you want me to pick? It could be a person we all know

37:09

or like a type of person. Like, I

37:11

see myself on the corner with a cigarette for sure.

37:14

I could see you as a

37:16

past prohibition bootlegger

37:20

Like you you no, do

37:22

you know what I mean? Don't ask me what I think of you. I don't know No,

37:25

but do you know what I mean? Like you are making it on

37:27

the dl and you knew all the people

37:29

and you like knew who to sell it to Okay,

37:31

why my brain went that far back in time?

37:33

I'm not sure but that but I do like that that

37:36

time Because I was thinking mafia

37:38

I was thinking and I was like, oh my god What if it was like

37:40

1920s flappers with her cigs?

37:43

I love the wand. And she knows all

37:45

of the, the Tommy Shelbys, if you

37:47

will, if you watch Peaky Blinders, that

37:50

type of person. I love

37:52

that Halloween costume also, Peaky Blinders. I love

37:54

Peaky Blinders costume, not Flounder. Oh my god. Not

37:56

Flounder. Okay, well first of all, the scally caps. Second

37:58

of all, the suspenders. I would fuck any man in a

38:00

scally cap, I think. Just the way the

38:03

suit with the pocket watch,

38:05

it's all just hot. Like there's just

38:07

no other, there's no other thing.

38:09

I will say, I want time. With

38:12

my girlfriends we went to London and

38:14

we were there for New Year's Eve and we went to a 1920s

38:16

like Great Gatsby party in

38:18

London and it was so fucking cool and I was

38:21

dressed as a flapper and it was a 10

38:23

Well that's acceptable. Yeah. Like,

38:25

as a costume, I really enjoyed it for

38:28

the evening. Were you like a, if you were a flapper

38:30

back in the day, does that just mean you were a whore? Like, is that like

38:32

a whore fit? No, I think it was a style.

38:35

Oh, okay. I also think it was a dancer, maybe?

38:37

Oh, I don't know. I actually don't know. Let me look it up.

38:40

Cause we learn things on this pod, you know? Yeah, we're

38:42

an educational podcast. You guys may not know this.

38:44

Oh, I

38:46

love it. Flapper was giving Heartlight

38:48

to me. You know? No flapper was giving batty.

38:51

A flapper was a young woman in the 1920s

38:53

who challenged social norms with her behavior

38:55

and clothing. Oh, okay. Flappers had

38:57

short bob, hair wore short skirts, and

38:59

often sported fringed dresses.

39:02

They wore high heels, bras, and laundry instead of

39:04

corsets and flappers, often accessorized

39:06

with peacock feathers. Okay, they

39:09

also drank, they smoked,

39:11

they danced the Charleston, they

39:13

were sassy, they

39:15

were liberated. They

39:18

are the baddies of the 20s. Okay,

39:22

good to know. Noted. Oh

39:24

my god, we just went on a tangent. What the fuck were we just talking about? Oh,

39:26

what I would be. I don't know. In your last

39:28

life? Yeah, I don't know. You would have been like the

39:30

first drag queen on the planet. I was literally

39:32

just going to say a drag queen. Yeah, 100%. You

39:34

would have been like the Yeah. Reigning

39:36

the parade for drag queens. Yeah. Whenever that was.

39:39

That makes sense. Whenever that was. Like, hosting the first

39:41

type of drag show. Yeah. Yeah.

39:44

You were the OG of the drag brunch. Yeah, I

39:46

feel really good about that. I

39:48

feel really strongly that that is accurate.

39:50

Good. Great. Moving on. Cool.

39:52

Do you want to tell your story first or do you want me to go first?

39:54

I have one. I'll tell mine. Okay, go for

39:57

it. Because I, I need to set the record straight here.

39:59

Because this is real. Oh, wow. This is legit. Oh,

40:01

you're going to take this way too far, aren't you? No,

40:04

I promise I won't. Here

40:06

we go. Okay, I'm going to tell you a story

40:09

about a little lad, okay? His name's

40:11

James, in case you want to know. And

40:13

I did read instead of watch things this time.

40:15

Okay, what article did you read? That's

40:18

the other part we have to do. Because

40:21

Miss Girl told me I needed to read a book the other day.

40:23

And you know what? I did. And I read a

40:25

study, a whole ass case study. Long

40:28

one. Big one. It was in a document. Really

40:30

long. Lots of pages. It was called The

40:32

Case of James Leininger,

40:34

an American case of reincarnation type by

40:37

a doctor named Jim B. Tucker, okay? Very

40:40

impressive. And he spent a lot of time with this lad and wrote a whole case

40:42

study on it, okay? Very impressive, Colleen. And then I read

40:44

another little wanky little article called

40:47

Parents Think Boy Is Reincarnated Pilot by

40:49

ABC News. No specific author. Oh,

40:51

those ones are crazy. My favorite murder,

40:54

and I think Morbitt has done a bunch of those.

40:56

We're like little kids. They're like, oh, yeah.

40:59

Oh, we're gonna get there. It's just insane. Like it's

41:01

crazy It just comes out of their mouth and their parents are like what?

41:04

Especially about a pretty complex

41:06

topic like not I drove a truck

41:08

and I was a firefighter Like I was a pilot

41:11

during this time With this type

41:13

of play during X war like

41:15

that's fucking crazy My child said

41:17

that to me. Well, we will get into it, but he's out

41:20

return to sender Something's

41:23

not right. Okay, so I'm

41:25

gonna tell you the tale about our little boy James James

41:28

Linninger He's the son of Bruce and Andrea

41:31

and they're a Protestant couple from Louisiana. Totally

41:33

normal family. They're an average couple Totally,

41:36

like, run of the mill, whatever. They even go as far

41:38

to say that they are probably the least likely

41:41

to have a scenario like this pop up in their lives. Do

41:43

you know what? Every small town, it's

41:45

like, Nothing like that ever happens

41:47

to us. Nothing would ever happen here.

41:50

And then there's like a murder of a family of five.

41:52

Oh, Jesus, I know, I know. Or

41:54

it's like a subject of a serial killing. But

41:56

we're safe here, we leave our doors unlocked. Me

41:58

and you both. Yeah, it's upsetting.

42:01

Sorry, I'm just saying it's always, it's always the case.

42:03

I know, I know. It's also like another thing when something happens

42:05

to somebody, it's like they were the shining light

42:07

and they were the nice, they lit up a room. It's

42:09

like, no, they didn't. Don't say that about me. Alright,

42:12

I sucked. What do you want us to say about you? I sucked the positivity

42:15

in the room. A hater to

42:17

her core. Put it on

42:19

your tombstone. Okay. I don't want

42:21

any of that shit. Come on. Anyway, something's

42:23

gonna happen to me because. You're

42:26

a cockroach. There

42:28

are just some people who like You know when there's

42:30

people who at least deserve it and they live until the end

42:32

of days? Sure do. There

42:35

she is. Stop. Don't

42:38

say that. And it's like, oh, I don't want to make it till 30, I'm going

42:40

to make it to 102. I just fucking

42:42

got it. And I'm like, I'd love to

42:44

be 102 and I'm going to die at 50.

42:47

I'm like chainsawing cigarettes and people are like, how is she still

42:49

alive? It's like you and me both. I've

42:52

actively tried to make sure this didn't happen

42:54

and somehow I'm still

42:57

aging. Anywho,

43:00

back to James and his family. He,

43:02

the star of the show today is our little boy James.

43:04

He was born on April 10th,

43:06

1998. He is a sweet baby angel child as seen here, okay?

43:10

Oh, he's very cute. He's wearing

43:12

a Buzz Lightyear shirt and he's in a little plane.

43:15

Yeah, he's so cute. He'd be loving the planes. He's immediately

43:17

loving the planes. Yeah. So, his

43:20

parents, uh, let us know that

43:22

the first notable incident that he had was back

43:24

in 2000 when he was 22

43:26

months old. So that's like not even two. Also,

43:29

can you stop using the months? I don't want to do math. So

43:32

yeah, I think any time over,

43:34

I would say normally a year, but some people go into

43:36

two. Some people do three. It's like,

43:39

stop. Your child's three. What are you doing? Your

43:41

child's three. Yeah, knock

43:43

it off. Touch some grass.

43:45

So he's less than two years old at this current point in time. Keep

43:47

that in mind. His dad takes him to

43:49

the Kavanaugh Flight Museum. It's right outside of Dallas because they

43:51

were living in Texas at the time. And

43:54

he was always fascinated by planes anyways. Like, every

43:56

little kid is with their little knick knacks. Like, doing like, Whoa!

43:58

And like, throwing things. And like, just kid things.

44:01

I don't know. You know, they're putting them in their mouth and then like, throwing

44:03

them. You know, it things. Little

44:06

things that it's do. Little kid

44:08

tings. Little

44:13

grubby things. I don't know. I'll shut

44:15

up. But on this day in particular

44:17

at this museum, he was sliving

44:20

for the World War. Sliving

44:23

for the World War II exhibit. I

44:26

couldn't tell you when World War II was. I

44:29

couldn't tell you. Stop. Colleen. I couldn't tell you who

44:31

was in the front. Please

44:34

make it stop make please convey please

44:36

I can't I don't have the strength today This is

44:38

relatable because it's like how does he know these things that he's

44:40

about to say and I I as a 27

44:42

year old You're not the you're not the gauge. You're

44:45

not where we're starting I think if you ask most of the people

44:47

my age and be like, oh really who sir? I mean it's

44:49

who served who were the active parties

44:51

in World War two. I don't think they'd be able to answer

44:53

that either Catholic

44:57

school Did you So dirty.

45:00

Who was slang? World War ii. We literally

45:02

learned about it for almost a whole

45:04

year. All I know is is ancient Egypt,

45:09

Sarco kisses. As

45:12

far as hieroglyphics history goes,

45:14

that's all you know. Yeah.

45:17

Also, futon common. Tell

45:20

all about him. Ramses?

45:24

Okay, so last episode, I

45:26

cut it out because I

45:28

was talking about Ramses on

45:31

Love is Blind and in the middle

45:33

of my sentence, Colleen

45:35

goes, Egyptian. And

45:38

I was like, Okay, Ancient Egypt. No, you

45:40

said Egyptian. And I

45:42

said, you're being racist. And

45:46

you were like, no, that's a

45:48

pharaoh. Or you said some shit.

45:50

I did, and then you were like, where does

45:52

your brain go? I'm like, how did we get

45:54

here? I don't know. Yeah, I cut

45:57

it out because I thought you were going to get us canceled. It ended up being

45:59

really funny, and I kind of wish I kept it.

46:01

It was unintentional. Anyway,

46:05

off on the 45th tangent of the episode.

46:07

He is slipping at the World War II exhibit,

46:09

in case you forgot. Imagine

46:12

caring about World War Two at the age of two. Can

46:15

you even talk at two? No!

46:18

Uh, yeah, yeah, some, some kids

46:20

can, yeah. Like how old is

46:22

Claire? But not, Claire's two. Okay.

46:25

But some, some are super early developed,

46:27

some wait till later, like some people don't talk till three

46:29

or four now. So just like think about Claire saying this shit, okay?

46:32

No, that's fucking crazy to me. I

46:34

mean Danny, I don't know, Danny was talking

46:36

in full dinosaurs at a year and

46:38

a half. Yeah, dinosaurs, not World War II regimen.

46:41

Yeah, that's true. That's incredibly

46:44

niche. It's a niche market. We'll

46:46

get into it. Okay, great. Uh,

46:49

when they left after three hours, because he literally

46:51

wouldn't let the dad leave. He was like, no, I'm, I'm

46:53

dialed in. And so his dad buys him, like, some

46:55

toy planes, and we're like, we gotta get the fuck outta here. And

46:57

so he leaves, like, happy as a clam, nothing weird.

47:00

And then two months after that trip, he starts

47:02

saying things a little out of whack, like, airplane

47:05

crash on fire! And then slamming his toy planes!

47:07

Oh my god! Yeah. Nose first into

47:09

the family. He's like, brr, brr, brr, brr. No,

47:11

he did it so avidly that there was tons of scratches

47:13

and dents on all the tables. Oh my god, he's literally

47:16

reenacting Talk

47:18

about hyperfixation. A theater major, maybe? I'd

47:21

be like, you break it, you buy it, bitch. Reenacting

47:24

war. Yeah. On the tables. Yeah,

47:26

what? What are we doing here? Damn. It's

47:29

coming out of your college fund, kid.

47:31

So he repeats this ridiculous behavior over and over

47:33

again and it just doesn't end. And so, James's

47:37

father traveled a lot and when James and his mother

47:39

would see him off at the airport, James would say weird things

47:41

like, Daddy, airplane crash on fire, and he would just

47:43

repeat it over and over again and they just kind of were like, shut the fuck

47:45

up. Knock

47:48

it off. Also around this time. He

47:50

has really ridiculous nightmares. He,

47:52

I mean as kids do, kids just like have nightmares. But

47:55

he would do screams at first and then after a while it

47:57

would be like airplane crash on fire little man

47:59

Can't get out like really out of pocket

48:01

statements. What the fuck? What

48:04

the fuck is happening? Little man can't get out. Little

48:06

man can't get out. Get out of where?

48:11

Jeez Louise. There's someone in the well? What

48:17

the fuck? I don't know. I'm high

48:19

and that wasn't even funny. It's not

48:21

funny, that's why I'm laughing. I'm like where did that just come

48:23

from? Then

48:26

one day while he's playing James just nonchalantly

48:29

states Mama, before I was

48:31

born I was a pilot and my airplane got shot

48:33

and the engine crashed in the water and that's how I died. You

48:36

know. I mean,

48:38

I think you might have been closer to three at this point, but like, either way,

48:41

two to three, it's fucking crazy. It's way too young. So

48:43

mom's like, oh, okay. And then another

48:46

time his mom said that she bought

48:48

him a home a toy plane and he pointed out what

48:51

had like, was like a bomb or something on the other

48:53

side of it. And she says

48:55

that James fully corrects her when she's like, oh yeah, a bomb.

48:57

Cool. Like, it's fine. Yeah. All right. Bye. And he goes,

48:59

no, it's a drop tank. Oh. And

49:03

she said, I have never heard of a drop tank before.

49:05

I didn't even know what a drop tank was. What

49:08

the fuck is a drop tank? It's like when, in

49:10

World War II, they were dropping, it's called a drop tank

49:12

on the bottom of the plane. So she's like, oh, and he's, he's

49:15

like, no, it's a drop tank. Duh, mom,

49:18

read a book. Duh. Call

49:20

your boy cousin, idiot. So

49:23

after a little while of all these weird dreams and these

49:25

weird ass hyperfixations, James,

49:28

like, comes up with this understanding and he

49:30

just, he tells his parents this, okay? He said,

49:33

oh my, my plane crashed on fire and

49:35

that's, and it had been shot by the Japanese. Oh.

49:39

Just like, was like, oh, I just want to let you

49:41

know. I mean, okay, fair

49:43

enough. That the Japanese shot my plane. Like, just

49:45

said that casually. And then two weeks

49:47

after that, he

49:49

tells his parents that his plane was a Corsair,

49:51

which was, in fact, a fighter plane that

49:54

was developed during World War II, and he talked about flying

49:56

a Corsair way too many times to be normal. Okay.

49:59

Like, I would be so fucking scared if that was my child.

50:03

Yeah, that's fucking terrifying. It's so

50:05

specific and insane. It's not something

50:07

he was taught. He doesn't, like, he watches fucking,

50:10

probably Barney or something. Like, I don't know what they were watching

50:12

back then. Not World War II documentaries.

50:14

Barney is not on. He's

50:18

not alive during World War II. He

50:20

was born in

50:24

1998. No, no, no, I'm sorry, you're right. He was

50:26

my age. Oh my god.

50:28

Yeah. That's a weird thing to think about. Imagine

50:31

I was out in the valley talking about like the renaissance.

50:33

Britney Spears is on in the background and you're

50:35

like, Do you know that I shot down Do

50:40

you know what I mean? I'm like, I was in that tower. TRL.

50:43

Too soon. Wouldn't that be

50:45

fucked? Too soon, Colleen. I'm just

50:47

kidding. I would have been four. I would have at least been a little bit knowledgeable.

50:49

But World War II at age two is crazy. World

50:52

War II at age two is crazy. But me bringing up 9 11

50:54

at age four is not that crazy. That's true. That's what

50:56

I'm trying to say. That's true. Anyways,

50:58

I'd return that child to sender. That's, something's

51:00

not right. And I get that you could like have

51:03

high intelligence, or like a really high IQ

51:05

at like a young age, or like. Yes, true. But

51:07

it's simply a no. And also I know that whatever I'm

51:09

birthing with my genetics and my, it's just,

51:11

that's not what's coming out of me. That's just not. You

51:14

don't think? No. What if you had a wonderful

51:16

donor? I don't know.

51:19

I think the genes are too strong. You can attest to that.

51:21

The genes are way too strong for us. The genes

51:23

are way too strong. We can't

51:25

get rid of them. Can't. Well, you know how like after

51:28

a while, like if you start like

51:30

procreating with, like you're mixing it

51:32

up a little bit and like that part of your gene

51:34

should become smaller and smaller over generations?

51:36

No. Why hasn't it? Why hasn't it? Because the

51:38

other person keeps marrying idiots as well.

51:41

Okay. With drinking problems and Alzheimer's.

51:43

Oh, I guess I'm doing that. And diabetes. Not

51:51

the beatist. The wide backs

51:54

and the low ass cracks. Oh my

51:56

Actually, my ass crack is normal. I want the listeners

51:59

to know. I don't think I've ever seen your ass crack. Why

52:01

would you have, Colleen? I don't know. Not

52:04

everyone just is naked all

52:06

of the time. Girls see girls ass cracks.

52:08

Girl. I have not seen an ass

52:10

crack outside of yours that belonged

52:12

to a female in a very long time. I've been

52:15

a tanner before. You're a nu outside

52:17

of you. You're

52:19

naked in my house at least once a week.

52:22

That's fair. Whatever.

52:24

Noted. Noted. No

52:27

one else is a nudist, Colleen. That's just you.

52:29

What, people get married and then they don't show their friends their body

52:31

parts anymore? It's just

52:33

not a thing. It's never been a thing. You're

52:37

the weird one here. I want to be very clear

52:41

so they're like, okay This

52:44

man's talking about Corsairs, like, he's just not well.

52:46

So, Andrea, his mom, says that

52:48

her mom, so, James grandmother, was actually

52:51

the first person to suggest that he was remembering a past

52:53

life. If my, if my mother said that to me,

52:55

I'd be like, I don't think so. No, crazy.

52:57

So Andrea obviously was like, fuck no. But,

52:59

Like I said, James is only watching, like, kid shows, and they

53:01

weren't watching, like, regular World War II

53:03

documentaries. Like, they weren't watching the History Channel.

53:05

They weren't talking about military history at the

53:07

fuckin dinner table. Like, there's simply no way he would have learned

53:10

this information in preschool when he's, like, playing with, like, blocks.

53:12

Like, I don't know. I mean, yeah.

53:14

Again, it's very niche. So,

53:16

then James's nightmares get a lot

53:18

worse. And so they're basically happening every single night

53:20

now, and they're like, What the fuck can we do about this? So,

53:23

Andrea's mother, who is obviously, like, with the

53:25

times, clearly, uh, suggested

53:27

that Andrea and the dad take

53:30

him to a therapist. Her name is Carol Bowman.

53:32

She believes that the dead can sometimes be reborn.

53:34

She wrote a bunch of books on it. She's like iconic.

53:36

She's like the number one person for this. Okay. So they

53:38

get some guidance from Carol. She's like,

53:40

oh, yeah, definitely T here. T's

53:42

going on. And they

53:45

kind of encourage them like, oh, like have him

53:47

share his memories rather than just ignoring them

53:49

and kind of like getting freaked out by them. So when he starts making

53:51

those comments, like ask him more about it so that way he can

53:53

kind of like get it out of his system. And immediately

53:56

Andrea says that they do this and the nightmares start

53:58

to become less frequent. So it works. Okay, that's good.

54:00

And so with that, James becomes more

54:03

articulate about his past. Like,

54:05

what? What is he saying now? One

54:07

day, he told his parents that he had flown

54:09

his plane off a boat. Oh my god!

54:12

And when his parents asked him to name the

54:14

boat, he just says, Oh, Natoma. After

54:17

that conversation, his dad's like, Okay, well, I'm just gonna look into

54:19

this. Like, I'm just curious. Where is my son getting

54:21

these words? Yeah. So he searched online, and he discovers

54:24

that there was a boat called the USS Natoma Bay,

54:27

and it was stationed in the Pacific during World War II. This

54:32

is crazy. This is crazy! This is crazy!

54:34

His parents kind of like, they ask him, you know, a number

54:37

of times, like, what's the name of the little man you keep talking

54:39

about in your dreams? And he always responds with

54:41

only me or James. Like that's it, but

54:43

also his name is James. So I don't know. A few

54:45

weeks after James gave the word to Toma, his

54:47

parents asked him if he could remember anybody else that

54:49

was with him or around the little man. And he just,

54:52

he looks at them and says, Oh yeah, Jack Larson. my

54:55

god! So

54:58

specific. I know, and then just proceeded on.

55:00

Yeah, and that's the thing, kids will just drop

55:02

that, like pull the pin on the grenade and just walk away.

55:05

And you're like, what? You just hit us with like

55:07

actual history. Yeah, what? And

55:09

then he follows up and he says, Oh, Jack

55:11

flew off one day and he never returned, so no one

55:13

knows what happened to him. So he's

55:15

not like talking about himself, he's like talking about somebody else.

55:17

Okay, thanks James. So it's a little weird, okay? Very

55:20

weird. In addition to the babbling, he also

55:22

starts Drawing. Okay?

55:25

That was so Boston of you. Drawing.

55:27

Drawing. How did I say it? We say it

55:29

with an extra R, ironically, because we take

55:31

the R's out of other words. Drawing. Drawing.

55:34

Drawing? Drawing. I don't know. Drawing.

55:38

He expresses his memories in drawings. Now

55:41

I feel weird. Okay. No, please continue. And

55:43

he starts obsessively drawing these absurd

55:46

battles, aerial battles, naval

55:48

battles, if you will. And it's And it's Specifically,

55:52

between the Americans and the Chinese, I mean the Chinese,

55:54

and the Japanese. The Japanese. In which all the

55:56

planes are burning and crashing, there's bullets, there's bombs,

55:58

it's like not normal behavior at all.

56:01

And on top of that, they're so legitimate

56:03

that they're propellers in the front and not jets or missiles,

56:06

which is specific to World War II. And also,

56:08

he named the American aircraft

56:10

correctly, he called them like Wildcats and Corsairs,

56:12

which is like a World War II term, I wouldn't

56:14

fucking know that. And what did he just hear at this point? Two.

56:17

He's fucking two. Two and a half. And

56:20

then he referred to the Japanese planes as Zeke's Arbetty's,

56:23

which is the exact two terms that they used for them back

56:25

in the day. And he's two. Cause the girl's

56:28

name, I think that the boy's name, I

56:30

don't fucking know. So it's, the whole point is that it's legitimate.

56:32

Yes. It's accurate. So a two year

56:34

old is spewing this shit out. Do you want to see a picture of his drawing? Yes.

56:37

Oh my god, you have it. Yeah. Oh.

56:40

Sir. Oh my god! Oh,

56:43

we have to post that so people can see it.

56:45

Also important to note that he signs all of his He's two? Yeah,

56:48

he's two. This is how I know, because he

56:50

keeps signing them all, uh, that says

56:52

James three on them, and then when his parents ask him

56:54

about it, because he's two he said the

56:56

three doesn't refer to his age, obviously, but it's to being

56:58

the third James. So they're

57:00

like Is he So they're like, what? So

57:03

his dad's like, I'm gonna look into this, because that makes no fucking sense.

57:06

So, James's

57:09

dad goes to a whole ass Natoma

57:11

Bay reunion. These people

57:13

are artifacts. Oh my god, there's

57:15

like these old decrepit men. Yeah.

57:17

Oh, I love that they do that though for them.

57:20

That's so nice. That's really sweet. Like, who's a survivor?

57:22

Yeah, whoever is left. Pull them in. Like.

57:24

Oh. Yeah. That would make him weep.

57:26

So, I know. So he like goes around and like chats

57:28

a little bit with these peeps. He's like, do you guys know

57:31

some Jameses? You know Jack Larson?

57:33

You know him? Yeah. You ever know a guy? Uh, come to

57:35

find out that he did learn that there was

57:37

a Jack Larson from Natoma Bay and

57:39

that he did not die. He survived the war. He

57:42

said he went missing and no one could find him. Correct.

57:45

So, though he wasn't at the reunion,

57:47

he is in fact still alive, and James father went

57:49

to go visit him, and he learned They do a meet

57:51

up? Yeah, they do, they do a hook up. And he

57:53

learned that only one pilot from

57:55

the ship, he learned from him, from him himself,

57:58

from Jack Larson. Jack. That

58:00

only one pilot from the ship was lost during

58:02

the battle, that specific battle in World

58:04

War II. James. And his name, he was a 20

58:06

year old from Pennsylvania named James Huston Jr.

58:10

So, After the reunion, James

58:13

father turned his focus to Huston

58:15

instead, and he learned that

58:18

the Huston, that Huston's plane appeared to have crashed exactly

58:20

the way that James has described and

58:22

also drew over and over and over again. Baby

58:25

James described James Jr. 's death. Correct.

58:27

To a T. Yes. Described. Wrote

58:29

pictures. So his whole, he disappeared

58:31

and never came back that, when he's talking about

58:34

Jack. Yes. The live guy.

58:37

He, he just doesn't realize that he survived.

58:39

Yes. But James himself died. Because

58:41

if he's caulking from James POV, he

58:43

would've been dead. Yeah, he would've been dead. Right, right,

58:45

right. he was dead. Yeah. Turns out he is alive. So,

58:47

live and well. He survived. Turns out, joke's on you, James.

58:50

You the dead one. That's

58:52

my POV. Jack's still out here. That's little James POV. Jack's

58:55

a survivor. Must've

58:57

been real pissed to find that one out. Eww. So.

59:00

It appears the same way that he's described, he's been drawing it

59:02

over and over again, it just makes sense. So the aircraft

59:05

action report for that day, of the,

59:07

of the instances, says that Huston's

59:10

plane was shot down and it includes a chart of

59:12

the, the paths each pilot took, including

59:15

Jack Larson, which is the name that Little

59:17

James originally gave, and it's shown as

59:19

he's the pilot plane next to Huston's. So

59:21

he would have been what Huston was watching. Ugh.

59:24

So that's why he knew all about Jack, if that makes any

59:26

sense. And because

59:28

Huston was the only pilot from Atoma Bay that was actually killed,

59:31

his parents He's

59:35

the one that they're looking for. Like that's definitely the one that

59:37

little James thinks he is. And also when he

59:39

was saying that he was the third James on his

59:41

drawings, it's because I think that

59:44

James Huston, the pilot Junior, he was a

59:46

junior, so it was one before him. So that would make little

59:48

right. Him the third. Right. Sleigh.

59:50

And that's him. So handsome. Oh, handsome

59:52

boy. Yeah. Pop off.

59:54

He could get it. I'm just saying he could get it.

59:56

I don't think we ever agree on getting it men

59:59

and we both agree on that one. Yeah, that's a,

1:00:01

it's the teeth. Yeah, it's a good looking man. Yeah. Handsome.

1:00:03

It's a classically American

1:00:05

Yeah. Yeah. in a uniform too, you

1:00:08

know? Woof. So the

1:00:10

parents are like, Oh, this has to be it. And we have to look into this

1:00:12

more because like, you can't just like, Okay, cool. We have

1:00:14

that information. Like you can't let that go. So

1:00:16

they go to visit Huston's sister. She's

1:00:18

still alive. Her name is Anne and

1:00:21

they go see her and she gives them a

1:00:23

photograph. And it's a picture of Huston standing

1:00:26

right in front of a Corsair which

1:00:28

is exactly the one James mentioned.

1:00:30

Right. Sister Anne has

1:00:32

also verified other details earlier about

1:00:35

his, James's previous family, that he keeps

1:00:37

calling them his previous family. And

1:00:39

they speak with James. She goes and sees James herself

1:00:41

and she becomes completely convinced. She's like, oh my god, this

1:00:43

has to be my brother. Like, this is crazy. And

1:00:45

says that there's a bunch of, there's a bunch of different things

1:00:47

that she says that only like, My

1:00:49

her brother would have known and it makes no fucking

1:00:51

sense including there was like an existence of some

1:00:54

painting That their mother had of

1:00:56

ann as a child and little james talked about

1:00:58

it and she was like, how do you know that? Yeah, how else

1:01:00

would you know that unless you yeah again,

1:01:02

so little like it freaked ann out She

1:01:04

was like you're my brother. It's not like because a

1:01:06

part of me is like, oh the parents just want clout

1:01:09

or something Yeah, so there's a lot of people that think

1:01:11

but how would the parents know that? How would the parents

1:01:13

know any of that or did they just like pick

1:01:16

a random person and do it? Yeah,

1:01:18

that'd be like so much work and it's

1:01:20

so aggressive. Yeah, and like for honestly more

1:01:22

of an inconvenience Also, you really can't train children

1:01:25

like most kids are just kids and just

1:01:27

vibe. This one's like no, I have

1:01:29

a whole ass life I'm trying to get back to just letting you know

1:01:32

and I won't shut the fuck up about it He's

1:01:37

like making them he's not making them

1:01:39

but they're flying out to fucking reunions For

1:01:42

this kid. Like, good

1:01:44

lord. With actual antiques. Yeah! Fossils.

1:01:48

Oh my god. A couple other things that

1:01:50

are really interesting, in addition to all of this. James

1:01:54

stopped having nightmares for a while, right? He

1:01:57

has a, has a really, really bad one

1:01:59

after not having them for like a year on the anniversary

1:02:01

of Huston's death. Isn't

1:02:03

that so weird? So weird. And when

1:02:06

his parents had asked him why he named

1:02:08

his three G. I. Joe dolls, Billy,

1:02:10

Walter, and Leon, he just answers, That's

1:02:12

because that's who met me when I got to heaven. And

1:02:15

then the parents learned later That the three

1:02:17

squadron mates of Huston at the time,

1:02:19

that I don't think they died at that time, they died later in life,

1:02:21

their names were Billy, Walter, and Leon.

1:02:25

Too many things that are syncing

1:02:28

up. And obviously there's a lot of skeptics,

1:02:30

like we talked about, like And I

1:02:32

get it. I totally get it. I'm a hater too. I get

1:02:34

it. Hater to my car. That's just insane.

1:02:36

How could you not? Even just

1:02:38

be curious. Even just go, wait,

1:02:41

what is happening here? Like, cool, they could have coached him. They

1:02:43

could have taught him all that info. But, like, could he? Could they? He's

1:02:45

a two year old. And also, his fascination with

1:02:47

flying in World War II is, like, Great,

1:02:49

that's why he has knowledge about it, but like, the ability

1:02:52

to give details about

1:02:54

things that not even their parents know and also historical

1:02:56

facts about things that aren't written anywhere. Also,

1:02:58

I dare you to try to tell a two year old

1:03:00

anything and see what they do. I'm saying. Without

1:03:03

bribes. I'm fucking saying.

1:03:05

Like, this is shit that's not in history books. How did they just, you

1:03:07

know what I mean? So James today, he grew up,

1:03:09

obviously we're the same age, so I think, actually no, I think he's a year younger

1:03:11

than me. So he's 26. Yes because you were

1:03:13

born in a different year. Jesus

1:03:17

Christ. Oh my god. So what does he say

1:03:19

now? So the visions kind of went away over

1:03:21

the years, like they're just not as aggressive. But

1:03:23

he does say that if he tries to, he can obviously still

1:03:26

vividly remember the plane crash, all of the traumatic moments

1:03:28

as if they were from his point of view. Like he

1:03:30

can remember it that way. That is so fucking crazy.

1:03:32

Yeah, and it's, his story is like the number one. You

1:03:34

can't even remember what you did yesterday. Yeah.

1:03:37

And there is a kid. A second life he can remember.

1:03:39

Remember, rifling

1:03:42

off plane numbers. From

1:03:44

a past life. Yeah. You do not know what

1:03:46

you ate yesterday. And his old cohorts

1:03:49

from back in the day. All of his old buddies.

1:03:51

Yeah, okay. And the very specific trauma

1:03:53

he went through. You hate to see

1:03:55

it. You hate to see it. I'm kinda jealous.

1:03:58

But anyways, uh, his

1:04:00

parents, cause it's like the most popular story, his parents

1:04:02

wrote a book about it. It's called, of course, Soul

1:04:04

Survivor, the reincarnation of a World War

1:04:06

II fighter pilot. Like, could we not have come up

1:04:08

with a better name than that? What would you

1:04:10

name it instead? I don't know, like,

1:04:13

Pilots Live On Forever, I don't know, something like that.

1:04:15

No, but then you don't know what's actually in it. It

1:04:18

just sounds like a pilot book. It has

1:04:20

to be like, child re You

1:04:22

gotta get all the hooks. I think it needs

1:04:24

to have like a sassy Cool

1:04:26

name and then at the bottom be like a pie like a reincarnation

1:04:29

story like, you know, okay Well, why don't you work

1:04:31

shopping get back to us? Okay. Well, it became really popular

1:04:34

I'm not surprised He

1:04:37

still lives in Louisiana and he stays away from the spotlight

1:04:41

People are knocking down his door. Yeah, he

1:04:43

wants to live an ordinary life. Banging it down. But also,

1:04:46

you were reincarnated as this man. Because

1:04:48

he died at 21. In a plane crash. He had

1:04:50

more left to do. Yeah, maybe

1:04:52

that's why it happens. Do you want to see a picture of them next

1:04:54

to each other? Obviously. Ooooooh!

1:04:58

Shut the fuck up. Isn't that crazy? You

1:05:01

guys, they're, they're not identical,

1:05:04

but they're Same but different. Same

1:05:07

but different. Like if you put those people

1:05:09

next to each other. Oh my God,

1:05:11

that's so crazy. If you put these

1:05:13

two people next to each other, right. And you made

1:05:15

sure that the picture was taken around the same

1:05:18

time. you Know, one is very clearly

1:05:20

older than the other. You'd be like,

1:05:22

those people are twins. They're the same age. Easy.

1:05:26

Yeah. Just thought I'd share

1:05:28

that. Wow. Wow. And

1:05:31

that's the crazy story of our little boy, James. I

1:05:34

tried avoiding saying his last name. Cause I knew I was saying it wrong. So.

1:05:36

Even though I, the Google sound. Okay, well, what

1:05:38

did you hear on Google? Leninger,

1:05:41

and I said Leninger. Leninger? Yeah.

1:05:44

Leninger. It's, uh, Russian, in case you wanted

1:05:46

to know. Oh, good to know. Okay.

1:05:48

It's my turn. Okay. Okay.

1:05:50

Into the Stop

1:05:54

yelling at me. I got my

1:05:57

sources from a bunch of different places. I found this

1:05:59

article from White Space.

1:06:02

I read an article called

1:06:04

The Mind Blowing Tale of Shanti Devi, the Indian

1:06:06

girl who claims she lived Twice from

1:06:09

All That's Interesting, excuse me,

1:06:11

by Mark Hartzman and Wikipedia,

1:06:14

of course. This one's

1:06:16

tough because it happened so long ago that some

1:06:18

of the information was

1:06:20

like accurate but one

1:06:22

article would have one side and the other article

1:06:24

would have the same story but different. So

1:06:27

I tried to go with like what the most general

1:06:29

story I found was, okay? Okay. So,

1:06:32

Shanti Devi was born in New Delhi, India on

1:06:34

December 11th, 1926. She

1:06:37

didn't talk at all until she was three.

1:06:39

So opposite of our, our little baby

1:06:41

James the third. She's three years old.

1:06:43

But when she does start to talk, she has a very

1:06:46

interesting story to tell.

1:06:49

She told her parents that in her past

1:06:51

life she lived in a town called Mathura

1:06:53

and they had never taken her. Her parents

1:06:56

had never been there, and it was about

1:06:58

75 miles away. Okay. So

1:07:00

not like the neighboring town. She,

1:07:03

at one point, I think when she's six,

1:07:06

tries to run away from home and go there. So

1:07:08

she is like dead set on going to

1:07:10

Matora. This is my home. Random

1:07:13

things would trigger her memory,

1:07:15

so they would just be sitting down for dinner, and she would

1:07:17

ask for a food that doesn't

1:07:19

exist in New Delhi. In a

1:07:21

different dialect, essentially. That you've

1:07:23

never heard of. And they would be like, we don't have that here.

1:07:26

But how would she know that? Like, you know what I mean?

1:07:28

You're three. Yeah, what the fuck is happening?

1:07:30

Or they'd be getting dressed and she would talk about like the old

1:07:33

clothes she used to wear and like the outfit

1:07:35

she would wear. And one day, and

1:07:37

this is just like, kids sometimes are the fucking

1:07:39

worst. She's four, and

1:07:41

she goes up to her mom and she's like, you're

1:07:43

not my mother, you don't even look like her. I'd

1:07:47

be like, bitch, you came out of my vagina. Shade. Shade.

1:07:51

Four years old, like, you're not my mom.

1:07:53

Fuck off. So, she

1:07:55

tells her parents, she's like, My name's Lugdy.

1:07:58

Okay. It's not a shanty, it's a lucky. And

1:08:00

I died right after giving birth

1:08:02

to a son about 10 days later. And

1:08:05

she just starts going into like uncanny

1:08:07

details about labor pains and surgical procedures

1:08:10

that she underwent. At age four. At,

1:08:12

at, yeah, like very, very young. And

1:08:15

she was born, the way that

1:08:18

she phrases it, she was born the year after

1:08:20

she was killed. Or sorry,

1:08:22

after she died. She died after complications

1:08:25

with childbirth. But like, One

1:08:27

year later, Shanti was born,

1:08:30

not Lugdi anymore. So that comes

1:08:32

up again later, that there's a one year difference. So

1:08:34

she's about eight years old now, and she starts to go

1:08:36

to school, and the girl will be telling everyone the tea,

1:08:39

she will not shut the fuck up, about

1:08:41

her hometown, how her husband,

1:08:44

uh, like, she starts talking about everything.

1:08:46

Imagine being her teacher! No! She's

1:08:49

eight and she's just like, you guys

1:08:52

should hear about my last husband from my past

1:08:54

life. So she's just going on.

1:08:56

She's like ready to spill the beans. And

1:08:59

like I said earlier, she was speaking in

1:09:01

a dialect that almost has an accent. It

1:09:04

sounds like, like it sounds different. It would be like

1:09:06

us being like with Southern accent. Yes.

1:09:08

And they said from a young age, it was on

1:09:10

point. Like her teachers were like, Oh, this sounds

1:09:12

like the different, right. So

1:09:15

she even at one point names her husband. Oh!

1:09:18

She's like, Goddarn asswrap. Yeah, that's

1:09:20

my husband. Is he still alive? Uh,

1:09:22

so. Okay. I, again,

1:09:25

this is where it gets kinda choppy.

1:09:27

I saw her family did this, and I also saw her

1:09:29

headmaster did this. They put

1:09:32

this man's name down. They write to this town

1:09:34

She keeps talking about and he's fucking

1:09:36

alive and he writes back.

1:09:38

He's like, hello They're waiting and

1:09:40

they're waiting and they're waiting and they get the letter back.

1:09:43

What do you write? And he says, hey,

1:09:45

I'm Kenardith And I

1:09:47

had a wife pass away nine years ago She's

1:09:50

eight and

1:09:53

she died ten days after she gave birth

1:09:55

to our son And,

1:09:57

yeah, this is probably why she's talking

1:09:59

so much about surgery in

1:10:02

giving birth. That's crazy. So

1:10:04

he's like, yeah, this be me. I live here.

1:10:06

And also say, hey,

1:10:08

this is from so and so school. We have an eight year old that says she's

1:10:10

your wife. I do, oh, you mean to him.

1:10:13

I have no idea. Like, what the fuck did they I don't,

1:10:15

I have no idea. Okay, that's all. So they arrange

1:10:17

a meeting with her past husband

1:10:19

and her. And it's weird to say this,

1:10:21

but this fully grown man and this eight year

1:10:23

old child Is technically

1:10:26

the mother in this scenario? Yeah.

1:10:29

Even though he has a son? It's like, it's

1:10:31

all very weird. Also, aren't the son, they'd be the same age,

1:10:33

or he'd be a year older. Yes, so he's ten

1:10:35

and she's eight. Uh huh. Or

1:10:37

something like that. Uh, or,

1:10:40

yeah, ma ma. I go, that's

1:10:42

so weird because my next line is, Mother is mothering, no matter

1:10:44

the body. I

1:10:47

mean, I guess. Sure.

1:10:49

I just didn't know what to do with

1:10:51

this part. It's weird. It's weird. I'm

1:10:53

comfy. So they wanted to test her knowledge

1:10:56

so they see if they would

1:10:58

recognize him at the meetup. And so they like don't

1:11:00

tell her a lot. And at one

1:11:02

point, one article says that he like faked

1:11:04

who he was and who the son was. She

1:11:07

knows right away. She walks in. She recognizes

1:11:09

him immediately. In one article

1:11:11

said she gets

1:11:13

really emotional when she sees her son, who

1:11:16

is 10, who is And

1:11:19

she's eight? I'm

1:11:22

so scared. It's just all very, but

1:11:24

she's an eight year old, like going up to her is not emotional.

1:11:26

It's weird because I think of it as like, Oh,

1:11:29

that's who I used to be. Like, like for

1:11:31

example, James was like, I was this before, but I

1:11:33

am James now. Like he understands that that's

1:11:35

not him anymore where it's giving

1:11:37

this girl has no fucking idea that she's like, I've

1:11:40

always been lug D it doesn't matter what body

1:11:42

I'm in. I'm still going to be like, she's not accepting

1:11:44

it. No, she's not here for it. She is

1:11:46

like that. That's my whole ass family. I

1:11:48

don't belong to any of you bitches. It's giving orphan.

1:11:54

So the husband at one point. pulls

1:11:57

her aside and has a conversation with her and essentially

1:11:59

interrogates her. She answers everything

1:12:01

100 percent true. Like

1:12:04

they talk about everything and he,

1:12:06

it's so convincing that he leaves there and says,

1:12:08

that is my dead wife. Like

1:12:10

he's convinced a hundred percent. That's insane.

1:12:13

And he didn't stay like once for an hour.

1:12:16

He stayed for multiple days. So they talked

1:12:18

a lot. Yeah. He left there

1:12:20

saying that's my dead wife. Also,

1:12:24

poor him. Yeah, how fucking weird

1:12:26

is that? I have a piece of my dead wife, but she's

1:12:28

in a fucking 8 year old body. Well, wait. Put

1:12:31

a pin in that. So, this story is catching

1:12:33

like wildfire. It's showing up in all the newspapers.

1:12:35

I'll actually post what popped up in the

1:12:37

newspaper to the point where legit

1:12:39

Gandhi is interested. Like, like

1:12:42

the Gandhi. The one

1:12:44

and only. He finds out, and he

1:12:46

is like very into it. And he actually

1:12:49

sets up a commission to look into this.

1:12:52

So about 12 days after

1:12:54

her husband, her past life

1:12:56

husband visits, She

1:12:58

gets on a train with her

1:13:01

family, her parents, and 15

1:13:03

people in this commission to go to Matra.

1:13:06

Because they're trying to see what

1:13:08

will happen if they bring her home. And like how

1:13:10

she'll react? Yes. Okay.

1:13:14

And she says to them at some point like,

1:13:16

I'm not only going to bring you to my old house,

1:13:18

I'm going to show you where I've hidden money. And

1:13:21

there was like a secret place she hid money

1:13:23

or whatever. So the squad is rolling deep on the train.

1:13:26

We are Following the 8 year old. We are heading

1:13:28

out 75 miles and we are

1:13:30

seeing what this 8 year old knows.

1:13:33

I think she's maybe 9 at this point. So

1:13:35

when she gets there, there's a crowd of people. She picks

1:13:37

out family members, no problem, and

1:13:40

crowds of people. She's like, hey, how you been? It's been a long nine

1:13:42

years. Hey, listen, it's been a decade.

1:13:44

How you been? How are the kids? How's

1:13:46

the dog? Do I look a little different? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Am

1:13:48

I looking like I drank from the fountain of youth? Correct

1:13:51

because I did I have been reborn

1:13:54

so she like greets all these people and

1:13:56

she's kind of a celeb now So there's like a big

1:13:58

crowd waiting for her. So like the fact she picked

1:14:01

them out is a really big deal They

1:14:03

get on a carriage Because,

1:14:05

again, it's the 1930s. Right.

1:14:07

Okay. They, they were on their way to this

1:14:09

town on November 24th, 1935.

1:14:12

So we're talking When did Gandhi die?

1:14:15

Assuming he's Colleen Jesus Christ. Well, I was

1:14:17

gonna ask if he's still alive, he died

1:14:19

in 1948. So, it's

1:14:22

been a minute. Damn, look at him. What a legacy. Too

1:14:24

soon, Colleen. Sorry. So, he's

1:14:26

born in the 1800s. Jesus fucking Christ. Okay,

1:14:29

so they get on this carriage and she has absolutely

1:14:31

no problem leading them directly to her

1:14:33

former home. Okay. On the way,

1:14:35

she's pointing out new things, like buildings,

1:14:38

new buildings, roads that hadn't been paved

1:14:40

when she had been alive, and the driver

1:14:42

confirmed everything she was saying yeah, that's

1:14:44

new. That was built three years ago, not ten.

1:14:47

Points, yeah, she's on, she's

1:14:49

on the money. Okay, cool. and they get to

1:14:51

the house, which is the right house. She

1:14:53

apparently runs right up to a room with a floorboard.

1:14:56

And in the floorboard is a box

1:14:58

and she opens it and there's no money in it. And

1:15:01

she's like, what the fuck? Where is the money? And the husband

1:15:03

was like, I took it out after you died. Got

1:15:05

it. But it was, I mean, how would she

1:15:08

know that it was in that floorboard in that house?

1:15:10

Sidebar, her actual poor parents, I imagine

1:15:12

birthing a child and being like our perfect daughter.

1:15:14

And she's like, no, I am a woman from a different, yeah,

1:15:17

I'm like a whole ass. 38 year old

1:15:19

with a son. And you are not my parent. Like, I would You're not

1:15:21

my mom. You don't even look like her. She said

1:15:23

it. That's like a loss, in a way. Like Yeah,

1:15:25

it's like not giving birth to an actual child that's

1:15:27

your own. Correct. Yeah, it's crazy.

1:15:29

Like, you don't have a child. Wikipedia also

1:15:32

said she found out that her husband neglected

1:15:34

a number of promises he had made to her before

1:15:37

her demise. Oh, he's in the dog house. Like, on

1:15:39

her deathbed. And I just wrote, of

1:15:41

course a woman would reincarnate

1:15:44

and come back to haunt her husband to

1:15:46

make sure that, like The chrysanthemums

1:15:48

were on the grave. You know what I mean?

1:15:50

Yeah, yeah. She wasn't cremated in the right outfit.

1:15:53

The traditions weren't traditioning, you promised me. You

1:15:56

didn't celebrate Christmas the way that I wanted to that

1:15:58

year. But anyway, I also

1:16:00

saw That when he went to meet

1:16:02

her, he brought his new wife.

1:16:05

And so I think that's what it's referring to, is

1:16:07

that he had already remarried. Yeah,

1:16:10

I mean a decade. Which is a great reason to

1:16:12

haunt someone, respectfully. Yeah, that's fair. I

1:16:14

mean, at least the turn what was the turnaround time? We don't know. Yeah,

1:16:17

we don't know what the turnaround time was. Could've been

1:16:19

one year, could've been Like, how long

1:16:21

did you weep for me? Did you cry for a week? Exactly, exactly. Did

1:16:23

you cry for a year? Did you cry for a decade? It does depend.

1:16:25

It does depend. You have to give it some breathing

1:16:27

room, as someone with a dead parent. You You

1:16:30

can't hop right off the bus and go onto another

1:16:32

bus. You gotta like, sit at the

1:16:34

bus stop for a bit. I don't know

1:16:36

why I went a bus analogy, but this is where we

1:16:38

are. Yeah, no, you gotta sit there for a while. You

1:16:40

gotta sit. The commission published its

1:16:43

report in 1936 Confirming. that

1:16:47

the case of Shanti Devi, it was

1:16:49

concluded that she is indeed the reincarnation.

1:16:52

Uh, as Lugdy Debbie. That's crazy.

1:16:55

And so years later, a 1958

1:16:57

newspaper interview followed up with her. At the

1:16:59

time, she was 32. She never

1:17:02

married her whole life. She lived a really quiet

1:17:04

life. I saw a lot of places she

1:17:06

lived with her parents. She

1:17:08

was spiritual. She also

1:17:10

said she planned to form an organization,

1:17:12

quote, devoted to the idea of living our lives

1:17:15

according to the dictates

1:17:17

of the inner voice, end quote. Because

1:17:19

she's going by whatever her inner voice told her, which was that

1:17:21

she is not who she is. Yeah, I guess so.

1:17:24

She passes away 1987 at

1:17:27

the age of 61 in this

1:17:29

Swedish author, whose

1:17:31

name I will absolutely butcher and won't even try

1:17:33

to say, but will post, published a book

1:17:35

titled, I Have Lived Before, The

1:17:37

True Story of the Reincarnation of Shanti Devi.

1:17:41

It's just, she got so many

1:17:43

things right. That

1:17:45

it's, how is it not true? It's just like, how is

1:17:48

that not true? It's uncanny! Yeah,

1:17:51

I don't know, there's like, it's too much. Do you believe now

1:17:53

or no? No. Really? No.

1:17:56

I know a lot of articles came out after that commission

1:17:59

in the 30s. I mean, can

1:18:01

we trust anything in the 30s?

1:18:04

Right. And there hasn't been a lot,

1:18:07

like, okay, you know how we talk about sometimes

1:18:09

like what happens after you die and there's a lot of stories

1:18:11

of people who had near death experiences

1:18:13

or died and came back? It's pretty

1:18:15

well documented that if you were to look it up, you'd

1:18:17

be like, okay, something's happening here. Yeah,

1:18:20

something. This is so rare that

1:18:22

the few cases of it, I'm like, mm,

1:18:24

I Yeah, but it's so rare because it's like a numbers game. Obviously

1:18:26

it shouldn't be happening all the fucking time. No, but do

1:18:28

you know what I mean? If it happened more often,

1:18:30

I think we would have more tea about it. Yeah.

1:18:32

And it would make more sense. Yeah, I mean, I don't

1:18:34

really know what's cooking up there or down there, to be

1:18:37

honest. Yeah, what are they doing? I don't know.

1:18:40

I'll let you know when I go down and you go up. Okay.

1:18:42

We'll circle back. We'll circle back. You're probably gonna have to

1:18:44

come down to me, though. They're not gonna let me up. At least

1:18:47

it'll be warm. I'll get a tan.

1:18:49

Great. Or we could use, like,

1:18:51

uh, A walkie talkie system. Get

1:18:53

on the right channel. Do you think they would let us do that? I

1:18:56

don't know. I think we're too powerful for that. Can we call in a favor?

1:18:58

Nana! Nana? Nana!

1:19:01

I'll pick up gals out. Okay, so we decided to play a

1:19:03

game, and I saw this on

1:19:05

the internet, and it's, Essentially,

1:19:07

like, what's a real life version of a haunted house?

1:19:10

You know how you go in and there's clowns popping up? But what

1:19:12

is the real life, everyday version?

1:19:15

And so we decided to write a haunted house for each

1:19:17

other. Hold on, I need to take a big

1:19:19

sip of alcohol. Did you do just like one? I just did like a separate.

1:19:21

Oh, I did like seven rooms of hell. Oh,

1:19:24

okay. I didn't do it like my room, but I was just like, this is what, if

1:19:26

you were to walk into a haunted house, like what that would be for you. Yeah,

1:19:29

I have that. And I just know that mine aren't as good as yours,

1:19:31

I just know it, but Oh, mine are? I'm really

1:19:33

proud of mine. No, I might have had a conference

1:19:35

call with somebody for this one. Erin?

1:19:37

Okay, yeah, yes, because Oh my god, I asked

1:19:40

her, too, for awe both asked?

1:19:42

Wait, that's wicked funny, I asked because Mother! In my

1:19:44

defense, I was like, I know that, obviously, Bridget,

1:19:46

like, I know things that she doesn't like, but she's not

1:19:48

as hateful as I, that it's not as obvious, like, I really

1:19:50

want her to think about it. Like, obviously, I know things that tick you off Oh

1:19:53

my god, I'm so sorry. I'm so interested now.

1:19:55

Yeah. So I had some and then I was like, and she just, well,

1:19:57

she confirmed them obviously. And then she gave me a couple of good

1:19:59

ones. So I was like, thanks. Thank you so much. Oh my God. We

1:20:01

both did that. That's so fucking

1:20:03

funny. She is mother. Matriarch.

1:20:06

We don't deserve her. Okay. Bridget's

1:20:08

version of a haunted house to me at least is

1:20:10

you walk in and there's gorgeous men everywhere,

1:20:13

but they're all under five, five. I'd

1:20:16

still make out with one of them to be honest, but please continue.

1:20:18

I mean, obviously. Duh. I probably wouldn't,

1:20:20

but that's okay. DFMO. You walk in,

1:20:22

and it's just filled with people singing Shallow at karaoke,

1:20:25

and you are forced to listen to the entire song over

1:20:27

and over and over again.

1:20:30

Oh! Stop!

1:20:32

Everyone get a grip. I know how much I hate that.

1:20:35

You walk in, and it's an alternate universe that

1:20:37

you are forced to live in a place

1:20:39

where there are no dentists or regular dental cleanings. And

1:20:42

if there is, they do not take your dental insurance. That's

1:20:45

fucking mean. That one's mean.

1:20:49

That one is so mean. It's

1:20:53

103 degrees and 90 percent humidity and

1:20:55

you are in Disney World with no escape. I'm

1:21:01

sweating. I'm fully sweating. This

1:21:05

is, this is incredible. It's just

1:21:07

a room full of Jehovah's trying to recruit you. I

1:21:10

think I'd hear him out. I feel bad

1:21:13

for him. Come on, the Jehovah's? Yeah. What

1:21:15

about a Scientologist? Who needs, uh, no.

1:21:17

Yeah, exactly. Tom Cruise is the front runner. No.

1:21:20

And you have a group of Scientologists trying

1:21:22

to recruit you. Fuck off. It's

1:21:25

a room full of people from the deep south who hate drag

1:21:27

queens. I would

1:21:29

be so upset. I know. I would be so

1:21:31

upset. Just you and them. And you

1:21:33

know, I'd be like, listen, everybody.

1:21:37

What are they doing to you? This is wrong. Yeah.

1:21:39

Oh God, get my soapbox out. My last

1:21:41

one is a room full of a 60

1:21:44

year old plus boomers who took the town Facebook group

1:21:46

fight out of the chat and are in person and they have

1:21:48

brought pitchforks. Your

1:21:56

version of hell, mine of a dream. I was gonna

1:21:58

say, you would love that. Oh my god,

1:22:00

Colleen, that's wild. That's

1:22:03

all I got. Super accurate.

1:22:06

So wild. Really hard to find things that you hate,

1:22:08

to be honest. Oh, I'm sorry. I'll try

1:22:10

to be more hateful next time. No, it's a good thing. It's a good thing. Okay,

1:22:12

I want you to know that I wrote quite

1:22:14

a bit here. The first thing I wrote was

1:22:17

very simple, and I was just gonna do this.

1:22:19

Okay. Hall of Mirrors. Uh

1:22:22

uh. Uh uh. You I don't fuck

1:22:24

with that. Because you hate how you look. Yes,

1:22:26

correct. So I'm just gonna do that.

1:22:29

And then I said Oh well, if it's a skinny mirror. You

1:22:31

know how there's mirrors that are skinny mirrors? I mean, mall,

1:22:34

Burlington mall, lighting

1:22:36

and mirrors everywhere. It's like a Macy's

1:22:39

mirror. Yes, a Macy's mirror. No, the Marshall's

1:22:41

mirror Nordstrom? No, but Nordstrom's not

1:22:43

that bad. Marshall's is fucking beat. Listen,

1:22:45

Marshalls, step your pussy up. Okay? Okay.

1:22:48

That's what RuPaul would say to you. Okay. You

1:22:50

walk in. You're immediately greeted.

1:22:53

I think

1:22:56

I'd run

1:23:00

the other

1:23:04

way. Once

1:23:08

you sit through that you move on to the next room which is

1:23:10

filled with people from high school You never wanted to

1:23:12

see again telling you the weird shit They remember you

1:23:14

doing and how mean you were to them in

1:23:16

a circle around the room. The nuns are singing

1:23:19

old Catholic songs Oh my god,

1:23:21

this is so specific and I'm so scared.

1:23:23

In the next room You're all of a sudden hit

1:23:25

immediately by a vicious hangover You're

1:23:27

so thirsty. What's happening? There's

1:23:30

a refrigerator. Don't worry. There's no Diet Coke. It's lit

1:23:32

up in the corner. When you open it, you

1:23:34

see rows of Diet Coke. This is

1:23:36

amazing, right? You grab one. You take

1:23:38

a sip. You realize every single

1:23:40

one of them is regular Coke, and they

1:23:42

are all warm. You go to the freezer,

1:23:45

and there are no ice cubes.

1:23:47

But you have to drink a full regular

1:23:50

Coke, warm, to move to the next

1:23:52

room. I'm sick. Who

1:23:55

the fuck drinks regular coke? And warm!

1:23:57

Me! I do. Warm? Not warm,

1:23:59

but I drink regular coke. No, Ice Cubes is fucking criminal.

1:24:01

Okay, so you have to drink the regular coke. Okay. I

1:24:04

have a few more rooms. I'm

1:24:07

feeling so attacked. In the next room, you're

1:24:09

greeted by your closest Friends,

1:24:11

colleagues, and family members. You're

1:24:13

thrilled to see them, at first.

1:24:15

But then you realize, they're all in distress.

1:24:18

Each one of them needs a favor. Like

1:24:20

a ride to the airport, or someone to go

1:24:22

to the hospital with them. Or one of them needs

1:24:24

to take their dog to the vet. And you can't

1:24:27

leave the room unless you go up to each and every

1:24:29

one of them and say no. And,

1:24:31

it's not even for a good reason. You have

1:24:33

nothing else going on that day. You just

1:24:35

have to tell all of them no. I'm sure

1:24:37

I'm stuck here. The soundtrack to this room

1:24:40

is Katy Perry's new album on repeat.

1:24:44

The one that got away really hits though. The new album,

1:24:47

the flop era. No, she's really

1:24:49

just a flop in general, but. You

1:24:51

heard me. The next room is a bar.

1:24:53

Maybe you can go get a drink. Maybe this

1:24:55

will take edge off from this hellscape that you're living

1:24:58

in. Wrong. It's filled with gross

1:25:00

men everywhere. The lines are too long.

1:25:03

You can't get to the bar because it's packed. They're

1:25:05

all tall so you can't see shit and there's

1:25:07

nowhere to sit. Can I at least go to the bathroom?

1:25:09

Nope. No bathroom. You're becoming

1:25:11

claustrophobic and when you look at the walls,

1:25:13

you realize something. They're decorated

1:25:16

from floor to ceiling with all of your lost

1:25:18

debit cards. Each man at the bar,

1:25:20

is using your debit cards off the

1:25:22

wall to pay for their drinks and not

1:25:24

one of them is a union man. You have

1:25:26

to kiss at least three strangers

1:25:29

to leave this room and the soundtrack

1:25:31

in the background is the all of the

1:25:33

cliche wedding songs you never

1:25:35

want to hear again. Why

1:25:38

is this so good? I

1:25:41

have two more rooms. I'm

1:25:46

covered in sweat. Heavy

1:25:48

crevice. Okay. Wow.

1:25:51

The next room is filled with women. Okay.

1:25:55

I like that. You get excited because finally,

1:25:57

quote, the girly pops are here. Yeah.

1:25:59

Except, their moms, who

1:26:01

have babies with weird ass names and they have

1:26:03

Instagrams for all of them. They keep calling

1:26:06

them their best friends. And then,

1:26:08

the children come. No! Little crappy

1:26:11

kids. Not the children.

1:26:13

Little crappy kids. Who

1:26:16

are coughing, sneezing,

1:26:19

and scream crying, and

1:26:21

you have to babysit them alone for 20

1:26:23

straight minutes. The soundtrack

1:26:25

in this room is kids bop and the

1:26:27

sound of tears. You're

1:26:30

crying. One

1:26:34

more room, Colleen. What will happen

1:26:36

in this room? I wouldn't have made it through the first one. No,

1:26:39

you wouldn't. No. The last

1:26:41

room. You're now fully sweating, and

1:26:43

quite honestly, crying. I

1:26:48

wrote that verbatim. That's

1:26:50

when you see your bed. You're lulled into

1:26:52

a false sense of security because your bed is peaceful.

1:26:55

That means it's over. It's not.

1:26:57

You have to get into the bed with all of your clothes

1:27:00

on and your shoes. And the nightmare won't

1:27:02

end until you go into full REM.

1:27:04

But here's the catch. You have to raw dog

1:27:06

sleep. No melatonin, no

1:27:09

phone, no white noise machine, no

1:27:11

eye mask, no penjamin, and

1:27:13

the soundtrack in this room are just your

1:27:15

fucked up thoughts. Once

1:27:18

you hit REM, you can leave the haunted

1:27:20

house. I've never hit REM. I've never hit

1:27:22

ram. I'm stuck in this house. Mwa ha ha

1:27:24

ha ha ha. I'm stuck in this house fucking

1:27:26

forever. And that's the

1:27:28

end. I'm just like, I'm feeling so unsettled

1:27:31

right now. Was it too specific?

1:27:33

You should be a writer. That

1:27:36

shit is bananas. That was so good. That

1:27:38

was so tootie. Yeah. I

1:27:40

also called Erin and was like, these are the ones

1:27:42

I have. And then she essentially reiterated

1:27:45

what I had already written down. And I was like, fuck

1:27:47

yes. Glad we're on the same page and that

1:27:49

it's all, it's like saying no,

1:27:51

taking compliments, talking

1:27:54

to moms. Like it's these like

1:27:56

basic, so

1:28:00

funny. Oh my God. I tell you what I did

1:28:02

recently. Please help me. I would love

1:28:05

nothing more. When you said the mom thing, it reminded

1:28:07

me. I. was

1:28:09

at an event where I was talking to somebody

1:28:12

who like I don't really know that well but like I happen to know that she

1:28:14

was pregnant because I was told that she was pregnant but I also

1:28:17

at this time didn't know the context of how long, none

1:28:19

of that, whatever. Okay. So

1:28:21

when we were like, I was like being in conversation with her because we were like, we're

1:28:23

both were uncomfortable and then I was like, oh what are you drinking? Because

1:28:25

we were, we were drinking. Actually no, I don't even know if she was

1:28:27

uncomfortable but I was. Naturally. And I was

1:28:29

like, oh like what are you drinking? I don't know, I was just being in conversation

1:28:32

and she was like, oh, because it looked like a drink drink and she was like, oh it's a chili

1:28:34

tamale, I'm pregnant. And I was like, oh my God, I had no idea, like rats,

1:28:36

whatever. I, she was extremely pregnant, and

1:28:38

I didn't know. So like, would you be offended? You know what? No.

1:28:41

I wouldn't. Because, do you know what happens? People

1:28:43

ask, and it's not the case. Because she just gave birth. I

1:28:45

would rather you be And this was like a

1:28:47

month ago. A month ago. A month or two ago. She just gave

1:28:49

birth. Yeah. No. I would prefer you not

1:28:51

act like you have no idea and be oblivious,

1:28:54

than say, are you pregnant? And someone isn't.

1:28:56

Well, I would never say that. But, I didn't know.

1:28:58

Do you think she might have been a little bit offended that I was like

1:29:01

Oh, I had no idea. Like, I couldn't have just not, I could

1:29:03

have not said that. You know what I mean? No, I,

1:29:06

maybe she thought you were joking. Like, I wouldn't

1:29:08

read too much into it. Yeah, I lost sleep over it for

1:29:10

a little while, but then I was like, she doesn't really care. Cause did you

1:29:12

think you were poking fun of like, oh, I have no

1:29:14

idea and like being sarcastic because

1:29:16

she was so big? No, because I don't, like,

1:29:18

I don't know what she like normally looks like. So it's like, did,

1:29:20

I couldn't tell. No,

1:29:22

I wouldn't read too far into it, honestly.

1:29:25

Okay, that's all. Just thought I would share that. Let me know what you guys think. Again, I

1:29:27

would rather you go. Yeah, that's

1:29:29

all. I had no idea. I probably met this person in

1:29:31

person like one time, so like. Yeah. I think that's

1:29:33

fine. Didn't know her stature. I don't know. Yeah. That's

1:29:36

all. Give me the good positive energy. Okay,

1:29:39

so I do have two positive stories

1:29:41

of the week I completely forgot the last time we recorded

1:29:43

also Colleen Snapchat

1:29:47

videoed me and she just

1:29:50

said why do we hiccup and

1:29:52

I I fear that Colleen has reached a point

1:29:54

of delusion where Snapchat

1:29:57

videos have become Google, like what

1:29:59

your grandma would put into Google. Colleen

1:30:01

just puts it on Snapchat for

1:30:04

the world. Yeah, I just want a response.

1:30:06

Fiona casually. This was this

1:30:08

was a snapchat video. I was dying laughing

1:30:10

I just was not expecting her to say it. I forgot what we were talking

1:30:12

about. The acting it out too was wild.

1:30:15

And I was like, no you need to do that again because if that is real

1:30:17

that is like criminal behavior. You should, your teacher should I think

1:30:19

this, I will say I think this person is unwell.

1:30:21

Yeah, but the thing is like what I expected like a fully

1:30:24

like Unwell person when she showed me yearbook.

1:30:26

She looks like you and I Not

1:30:29

to say that we're normal. I was gonna say Also,

1:30:32

I pictured like a person with like one eye like

1:30:34

I just didn't like just someone that

1:30:36

was like fucked up Okay, we'll explain to the people

1:30:39

and then they'll understand why we say this. She tells me

1:30:41

all of a sudden she's like, oh my god I went to high school with this girl

1:30:43

who like in science class across from me used to like blatantly

1:30:46

like hump her chair in her desk and like fully

1:30:48

Orgasm at her desk in the middle

1:30:50

of class and I was like, I'm sorry, what?

1:30:53

And so she reenacts it in a way where she like,

1:30:55

puss, puss, pusses. Oh my God. Pusses. She

1:30:57

pusses, her pussois. No, she puts both of her

1:30:59

hands on the desk and she's just like legit humping

1:31:02

the air. And then like her teacher would be like, Oh, like,

1:31:04

what are you doing? And she would be like, one minute. Like it

1:31:06

was, she like would thrust in

1:31:09

a aggressively, in a very quick pace

1:31:11

with her legs crossed against the table.

1:31:14

And so. Fiona does this thing where she

1:31:16

like puts her arms directly at like

1:31:18

lock your elbows and curl your fingers over

1:31:20

like you're curling the end of a table and then

1:31:22

just thrust your hips really fast and that's

1:31:25

what Fiona was doing. And then she's like, yeah, that's

1:31:27

what she did. And she couldn't get the words out because she

1:31:29

was laughing so hard. And I

1:31:31

was, I couldn't stop laughing at her. I was

1:31:33

like, Oh my God, Fi, this is so fucking funny. This is like

1:31:35

the first thing you should have ever told me. I was gonna say,

1:31:37

how are we just learning this now? That's fucking insane.

1:31:40

I was with a person that I've known for

1:31:42

a really long time the other day. I was like, And I was

1:31:44

talking about how my sister and I

1:31:46

and my family, we spent a lot of time in Disney World

1:31:48

growing up because we Cheered in every

1:31:50

year like we didn't go elsewhere.

1:31:53

We went to Disney every year Yeah, I'm sure Erin won't

1:31:55

mind me saying this but she got her period there for the

1:31:57

first time so I was saying like We

1:31:59

grew up there in a lot of ways, like we had a lot of firsts

1:32:01

there, a woman at Disney World. And I was talking

1:32:03

to my friend and she goes, Did I ever tell you the first time

1:32:05

I ever got fingered was at Disney World? This

1:32:08

is a person I've known for 15 years. I was

1:32:10

like, What? What did you just say to me? What

1:32:13

did you just say to me? And

1:32:16

she talked about how her

1:32:18

and her friend, she was like with someone's family.

1:32:20

Oh, yeah. And they were like teenagers.

1:32:22

And there was like a pool and everyone was like laying on the lounge

1:32:25

chairs and they started chatting. And she,

1:32:27

she was like, it was at a resort. It wasn't like,

1:32:29

in the middle of business. Magicating him, getting

1:32:31

my pussy popped. Okay, but like, kind of a dream to get

1:32:33

finger popped at like, inside the castle? Finger

1:32:35

popping each other's assholes. She was getting her

1:32:38

pussquad popped. No, it was like, at a resort

1:32:40

on the property, but she was like, Yeah, the first

1:32:42

time I ever got fingered. And I was like, how am I just

1:32:44

learning this information now? That's great. Two months

1:32:46

in I should be learning about it. Don't ever

1:32:49

keep this from me ever again. Two minutes. Yeah,

1:32:51

first thing you should say to me, fun fact about me, the

1:32:53

first time I ever got fingered was at a resort

1:32:55

in Disney World. With someone who likes icebreakers, that is exactly

1:32:58

what you should be asking people. Thank you! Colleen!

1:33:01

Please bless this. Okay, are you ready for my two positive

1:33:03

stories of the week? Yeah. Okay, so both

1:33:05

of these are from goodnews underscore movement

1:33:07

because you guys know I'm obsessed with them. Two

1:33:10

that, like, really made me tear up. The first

1:33:12

one is Valencia just got hit. With

1:33:15

a horrible flood. Like, everything is

1:33:17

ruined. It says Spaniards took

1:33:20

to the street after the devastating floods in Valencia

1:33:22

to help clean the streets of mud. Cook

1:33:24

for those affected. Farmers came in with their

1:33:26

tractors to remove debris. Everyone

1:33:28

was in the streets. No one was home.

1:33:30

This is the streets. Oh.

1:33:34

I love good people. They literally, everyone

1:33:37

in this city just

1:33:39

stepped up. Like, anyone from near

1:33:41

and far came and just helped do

1:33:44

whatever they could. Tractors,

1:33:47

people with shovels were just like, Alright, let's

1:33:49

go to work. Let's do this. All

1:33:52

day and all night. Where do those people

1:33:54

exist these days? Spain, turns out.

1:33:57

The second one really got me. It says, six

1:33:59

year old Ada Hawks became profoundly deaf

1:34:01

at 18 months. Colleen, how many months? What

1:34:04

year is that? A year and a half. That's

1:34:06

correct. Every Halloween her family

1:34:08

was sad and their daughter couldn't enjoy trick

1:34:10

or treating. Faces covered in masks

1:34:12

in the darkness had, had made communication

1:34:15

difficult. That's until this year. When

1:34:17

the neighborhood found out and

1:34:19

rallied and learned British sign language

1:34:22

for Ada. Their efforts

1:34:24

have been successful as 60 percent of households

1:34:27

in Ada's neighborhood started learning Halloween

1:34:29

themed BSL phrases like

1:34:31

trick or treat and you look spooky. And

1:34:34

so let me show you the video. Adults

1:34:36

are practicing their Halloween

1:34:38

greetings. Yeah! children, sometimes

1:34:40

Ada has to be

1:34:42

reminded to say for

1:34:44

the candy. So

1:34:57

it's a YouTube video from Inside Edition

1:34:59

and it's the neighbors, like

1:35:01

these little old people really stepping up for Ada

1:35:03

and learning British Sign Language so that she

1:35:06

can have fun trick or treating.

1:35:08

That's so wholesome. I know.

1:35:10

People are good and kind, believe it or not. I

1:35:12

just don't know where they are. They exist,

1:35:15

Colleen. Okay. They exist. All right. I believe

1:35:17

you. I think that's all we have today. I would

1:35:19

hope so. It's been like two fuckin hours. Well,

1:35:22

everyone, we hope you have a wonderful week. We

1:35:24

hope the next time you hear our voices we are

1:35:27

celebrating life and democracy

1:35:30

and Keep calm and carry on

1:35:33

and also maybe

1:35:35

take a gummy because it's fucking stressful

1:35:37

out there. It's tough in these

1:35:39

streets. Literally, physically,

1:35:41

mental, what? Physically,

1:35:43

mentally, financially, spiritually.

1:35:46

Metaphorically. It's all

1:35:48

tough. It ain't right. And guess what?

1:35:50

We fucking love you. So love you, mean it. Love

1:35:53

you, mean it. Bye!

1:36:04

podcast was produced by me,

1:36:06

Bridget Shannon. Music is

1:36:08

written and performed by Matt Derosiers. You can

1:36:10

find his band, Super Stoker, anywhere you listen to

1:36:12

music