0:00

Hey, this is exciting My guests today.

0:02

Well, first off, there's two of them, so it's

0:05

double the fun. They are naturally

0:08

very funny people. They're also very

0:10

kind and warm people, and I really

0:13

enjoyed chatting with them. It's

0:15

funny because, you know, I interviewed my wife

0:17

a few weeks back, and that was a really

0:20

rare occasion for us. But this

0:22

couple that I talked to today, they seem to love

0:25

being interviewed and they do it

0:27

really well, even if they are from zooming

0:29

from different places, probably different

0:32

parts of their house, but I don't know. But my guests

0:34

today are Seth Rogan and his wife, Lauren

0:37

Miller Rogan. So listen

0:39

up, lean in. I'm glad

0:42

you're here.

0:51

I am super excited today

0:54

to have Lauren Miller

0:57

Rogan and Seth Rogan on the

1:00

podcast.

1:01

Uh.

1:02

You guys are the first couple that

1:05

we've had. You're probably not going to be surprised to hear

1:07

that. Uh. And it's also

1:09

a little bit coincidental because the

1:12

second podcast that I'm going to do today, I'm

1:14

going to interview my

1:16

wife, which should be interesting, you

1:19

know, I mean, good

1:21

good.

1:22

Luck with that.

1:23

Yeah, maybe

1:25

this is a good warm up. I don't know what exactly,

1:28

yeah, exactly, but I mean, listen, you

1:30

know, I don't think I

1:33

have a feeling that you, the two of you,

1:35

don't often do the

1:37

interviews together. Am I right about

1:39

that?

1:41

Not our first?

1:43

Yeah?

1:43

First, we've Yeah, we've done a couple, We've

1:46

done a couple of ye. Yeah.

1:47

I mean I guess I guess your involvement with

1:50

the with the charity has made that, you

1:52

know, kind of possible. I know that for Kira

1:54

and me, we try to avoid it,

1:57

like the plague and

1:59

the Yeah. I mean,

2:01

the problem with it to me is,

2:05

and I'm saying this because I'm about to jump into

2:07

this, is the questions

2:09

are just irritating. Do

2:14

you How do you feel about answering questions

2:16

about your marriage? I guess that's what I'm trying

2:19

to say.

2:21

I feel like because

2:23

often the interviews that we do together

2:25

are focused on our charity.

2:28

They generally are focused on our charity, whereas

2:31

you know, I guess in those moments where we're doing things that

2:33

are not focused on our charity. Sure, the last about our marriage,

2:36

and it's just like you know, it depends on how you're.

2:38

Feeling and what you want to share.

2:39

I think it's like we do share a chunk of

2:41

our personal life having this organization,

2:44

but certainly there are many things we do

2:46

not want to talk about and do not so

2:50

you know, it's it's always like,

2:52

you know, I feel like it depends on the day, right, Like I

2:55

don't know, Seth, what do you think?

2:57

Yeah, I feel like we haven't you know, I feel like we both

2:59

have I have a good sense

3:01

of one another's discretionary

3:04

preferences.

3:08

But yeah, you know, also like we

3:10

come from a place where, like when we first started dating, I

3:12

was on like Howard Stern every other year, so like a

3:15

lot of it came out. Probably that a lot

3:17

more came out than I would have preferred it.

3:19

Probably much earlier.

3:20

On in retrospect.

3:21

And never listen to how long?

3:23

How long have you been married?

3:25

We've been married for twelve

3:27

years, but we've been together for over

3:29

eighteen.

3:30

Now, amazing. Wow, And

3:33

how did you how did you meet?

3:35

We met?

3:37

I was a writer on The

3:39

Ali g Show in two

3:41

thousand and four, and

3:45

I was twenty two. I

3:47

guess twenty four, yeah, twenty two, And

3:50

my friend Will Riser was

3:52

a producer on the show, and

3:56

he was around our age.

3:57

He was a year older basically, and he

3:59

was dating my friend Lawrence

4:01

basically.

4:02

Yeah, and so so yeah,

4:04

they kind of suggested

4:06

that we would like each other and we all went to a party

4:08

one night together and

4:11

and that was it.

4:12

Yeah.

4:13

So I mean, I gotta say it's

4:15

it's probably I don't know, not

4:17

that often that when

4:19

you hear those stories, it's I always think, isn't

4:21

that great that somebody had had

4:23

the understanding the friends could have the understanding

4:26

of two people to know that they would be you

4:29

know, it's kind of beautiful in a way to have friends that would

4:31

like kind of get get that. On

4:33

the other hand, it doesn't happen that often

4:35

though.

4:35

I know.

4:36

I never set people up, but specifically

4:38

I don't want to deal with the fallout of it. We

4:40

were pretty young, so maybe they weren't understanding

4:43

the full social ramifications of it.

4:44

But yeah, I hate setting people up for

4:47

that exact reason.

4:48

Hate it.

4:49

Do it when it's when people are like, oh a little bit.

4:51

It's like, sure, well you're nice and you're nice, you'll have a good

4:54

time. But it's like, oh, it's so much pressure.

4:56

I don't think I've ever tried to tell you the truth.

4:58

I can't think of a single time when I've ever really

5:00

tried to set set somebody up, But I wouldn't

5:03

be terrified. I fit.

5:04

I don't either.

5:04

And at this point, if I know you and your single

5:06

like, I will never set you up with someone like.

5:09

If you if you've.

5:09

Made it this long, then I

5:12

would never throw you at the throw

5:14

you into a relationship with someone I

5:16

know.

5:17

Let me ask you something. We we

5:20

we are both you're

5:22

both in the in the simpler

5:25

in the same business, uh, directing,

5:28

producing, acting, all

5:30

that kind of stuff. How how

5:32

often do you discuss the

5:34

day to day ups

5:37

and downs and ins and outs of

5:39

career and and work and business.

5:43

I mean, I would say all all the time. Yeah,

5:45

it's you know, it's it's a it's a balance.

5:47

As you know, obviously our careers have been

5:50

different. But I

5:52

would say the fact that we both do the same thing

5:55

is something that is really beneficial

5:57

to our relationship because we both really have an understanding

6:00

of of you know, how it feels

6:02

for it to go well and how it feels for it

6:04

to not go well, and

6:06

you know, and and and literally I mean as as writers,

6:09

and certainly this is a tricky line to walk

6:11

and it doesn't always go well. But like

6:13

you know, we can share what we're working

6:15

on and give feedback and have conversations

6:18

and be supportive of it. Again, doesn't

6:21

always go well, but so

6:23

I think it's for us, it's you know, it's great

6:25

that we have that in common.

6:28

Yeah, you know, you put the word that you

6:30

use just now, which is something that I

6:33

really always hold on

6:35

to, is an understanding of

6:37

what it is. So you know, like

6:39

if you go, if you have

6:42

a I

6:44

mean, of course there's marriages

6:46

where one person would be you know, an actor

6:48

or another would be a you know, a dentist,

6:50

and it could work out fine. But

6:52

but for people that are in the

6:55

entertainment business, the things that seem

6:57

sometimes really kind of big

7:00

and hard seem

7:02

kind of silly to the outside world.

7:04

You know, like if I'm giving an example,

7:07

like if I if I go,

7:10

you know, hey, she's like,

7:12

what what's wrong? Why? You know

7:15

what you seem like you're, well, you

7:17

know, I just read this review and you

7:19

know this guy my

7:22

age, you know, just got you just got this

7:24

great review or just want to you know, an

7:26

oscar or whatever it is. I mean, to the outside

7:29

world, people go that is just stupid. I

7:31

mean, why would you let that even affect

7:33

your day? And it's the slightest bit, but there

7:35

is a kind of empathy and kind of understanding about

7:37

what it is that we do for a living. Not to mention just

7:40

a shorthand of you know,

7:42

whatever terms you want to use, you know,

7:45

call times and back end things.

7:48

Like exactly we talked about our back end mostly

7:51

I talk I talk about her back We

7:58

Uh, well, no, you're right. I think that's

8:00

something that we're both very at

8:03

peace with that it and in tune with is

8:06

is one another?

8:08

You know? Is that? Is that exactly what you're saying?

8:10

You get wrapped up.

8:11

You know, our emotional stakes are different

8:14

in this job. Some would say,

8:16

you know, the things that we get worked up about are

8:18

are inconsequential to others, but

8:21

to us, they're very meaningful. When you pour yourself

8:23

into your work and when you identify

8:25

through your work, and when you're an artist and you want

8:28

people to see you through

8:30

your work, and when it's not received

8:32

how you want, like, yeah, I think I

8:35

could see how.

8:36

You know. We what's nice is we are both in a position

8:38

to.

8:39

Truly understand like how

8:41

how how how painful that can be, you

8:43

know, and we don't kind of belittle

8:46

that at all, as as my other

8:48

friends do.

8:49

To meet.

8:56

Well, I know I have friends that do the same

8:58

thing. For me, it is that just don't

9:00

get it. And men family members

9:02

too that are kind of like, yeah, dude, shut up.

9:04

I've been with the I've been with filmmakers

9:07

as we've been as we've been like releasing

9:09

movies that are breaking literal

9:12

like box office records, and

9:15

and the filmmaker is still just focused

9:17

on the fact that, like the tomato score

9:19

is not what and yeah, and and

9:22

and I get and whenever I'm like, I get

9:24

it.

9:24

Like I see, I

9:27

feel the pain and it's and

9:29

it does. Yeah,

9:32

yeah, that's painful.

9:34

Exactly. You used the word

9:36

recently. I want to ask you both about this that

9:38

I have been uh

9:42

I'm coming to a new understanding of it. And the word

9:44

is artists. And I can tell

9:46

you that when I uh became

9:49

an actor, I was super

9:52

super focused on just getting famous

9:54

and getting wretch and getting girls. That was one hundred

9:57

had nothing to do.

9:58

And you crush that man, so exactly.

10:04

It was it had nothing to do with

10:06

the with the with art you

10:08

know, it was like to me, Bryan Brandt

10:11

was an artist and what I was

10:13

doing was wearing makeup and you

10:15

know, of saying somebody else's words.

10:18

But I think more recently I've

10:21

started to think about art

10:25

and the impact that

10:28

art can have on people,

10:32

uh individually, you know, in the

10:34

ways that they feel about life,

10:37

and then and the ways that that that

10:40

culture responds to things

10:42

and even uh you know, the

10:44

political change or awareness

10:47

of of of issues or whatever.

10:49

And and I'm not just talking about making

10:52

films or writing, directing, you

10:54

know, acting in films that have some kind of great, big

10:56

social point of view. But

10:59

I mean I'm about making horror

11:01

movies or comedies. You know,

11:03

you can impact people with these And

11:06

I'm starting to feel like, well, that's really

11:08

what art is, that's what it has been.

11:11

And I just wondered if

11:13

if you've ever had any kind of resistance

11:16

to that concept, and whether you have you

11:18

know, a point of view about that.

11:20

Yeah, well you went to art school or in

11:22

so I think you were conditioned from a very young age

11:24

to accept that, which is nice.

11:26

Yeah, yeah, I was going to say that. I think like for

11:28

me, I was I was an art kid

11:31

in that like from a young age,

11:34

I was happiest with crayons

11:36

and paper and a journal

11:38

that I could write everything

11:40

into. And so and I went then

11:43

to a middle school that was focused

11:45

on the arts and was in the visual arts program.

11:47

And high school I went to an arts

11:50

high school and was in the visual arts program. And

11:53

so expressing the

11:55

feelings that I had into

11:57

whatever art it was that I was making in

11:59

those programs I think was ingringed

12:02

in me that I didn't give it a second

12:04

thought, and that was like, Oh, that's what I do because

12:07

that's how I feel, and I've learning,

12:09

I've learned the skills and how to express

12:12

that through writing, drawing,

12:14

painting, sculpting, et cetera, et cetera. And

12:18

so for me, I

12:20

think I honestly never really thought

12:22

about that it was anything other than that. I don't

12:24

think of it as in this like at this point,

12:27

I absolutely think that storytelling

12:30

and what we do is art, but I don't

12:32

put a sort of pretentious spin on it

12:35

in any way other than I feel

12:38

that so much of what

12:41

we do is about connection and

12:43

understanding, and I'm

12:45

just expressing what I'm feeling

12:47

or what I'm thinking or what i'm creating, so

12:50

that someone else can be like, yeah, I feel that way too,

12:52

or I thought that was funny,

12:55

or you know, or I just I see myself

12:57

in that, and so I think that

12:59

that is, you know, and that is generally really

13:01

what what art is. It's a representation

13:03

of someone's interpretation of

13:05

a moment for the viewer or the audience

13:08

to have a relationship to

13:10

it. And I

13:12

think that's like, that's what we're always doing, is

13:14

people maybe pretensions,

13:17

but.

13:18

Yeah, it's I

13:20

just started to feel like how co musicians

13:22

get, like the worst musician gets to be called

13:25

an artist, Like it's true in

13:27

a world where Kid Rocks consider an artist, why

13:29

can't I consider myself an artist?

13:32

No, they definitely grabbed it. They grabbed

13:34

it, they took it before

13:36

we did, so unfair right

13:38

about that?

13:39

I got Yeah, at what point, I was at

13:41

the Grabbys and just like, fuck it, I'm an artist too.

13:43

I got

13:53

a fan out a little bit. I can't talk, obviously

13:55

for obvious reasons about things that are specific,

13:59

but I just want to say that I'm such a

14:01

great admirer of your

14:05

really singular kind

14:07

of career in the way

14:09

that you came to it. But also

14:12

besides the fact, there's

14:15

two things that I think are really interesting. One

14:17

is, in

14:19

the nineteen eighties, they

14:23

gave me a production deal

14:25

at a major studio and

14:27

I had I lived in New York, but I

14:29

had an office on the lot, and

14:32

I had a development person and

14:34

I had a and I had a secretary.

14:36

And we didn't do jack shitt and I

14:39

couldn't get I

14:41

was like, this is cool, I'm going to be a

14:43

producer. And nothing,

14:46

nothing got done. It

14:49

was so difficult. And you

14:51

have completely embraced

14:54

and you

14:58

know, just made this

15:01

made this a part of who you are is

15:04

finding stuff for you to

15:06

be, in finding stuff for other people to be, in

15:08

finding things that you think have value.

15:10

And I just I really admire that because

15:12

I think that so often

15:15

as artists take

15:18

it,

15:20

yes we are, we're just you

15:23

know, we don't get

15:25

it well. Either we don't

15:28

have the skill to do that, or we don't

15:30

get a chance to do that. So I just want to say

15:32

that I admire that.

15:33

Thank you. Yeah.

15:34

I mean I was lucky to be like brought up also

15:36

in like a very specific environment, like surrounded

15:39

by people who like we're

15:42

very geared towards like

15:45

producing, and I was like showing

15:47

how to produce, and I was shown, oh,

15:50

you can like nurture someone in their idea

15:52

and you could understand the logistics of how

15:55

things get brought to life from like a financial

15:57

standpoint and navigating the studio.

15:59

And and if.

16:00

You're a writer too, then it puts you in like a really

16:02

special position and the idea of being

16:05

like a writing producer, a producer

16:07

who can actually fix

16:09

the problems in the

16:12

material and help fix the problems and enable

16:14

people to fix the problems. You know,

16:17

that I get like I was brought up

16:19

around people who did that, and I

16:22

saw, oh, like if

16:24

that, if that's a thing we can do, then there's

16:27

not a lot of people who are

16:30

both you know, able to go

16:32

into a studio and you know, negotiate

16:34

budgets and deals and all that stuff, and if

16:36

there's a writing issue, they

16:39

could actually sit down and help

16:41

fix the problem, you know. And and so

16:44

it was yeah, I mean, but I got I

16:46

got real lucky in that I was kind of like shown

16:48

how to do that.

16:49

You know, who were those people that you say brought

16:52

you up in that way.

16:52

I mean it was Judd Apatow for sure. It was one

16:54

of those people. And he was brought up by Gary Shandling.

16:57

A lot of the the in a lot of ways.

16:59

And Gary was around me when

17:01

I was younger, and he really like

17:04

had that it was almost like a.

17:05

Rick rubinesque like comedic

17:08

figure.

17:08

You know.

17:08

It was someone who was like.

17:11

Really was trying to inspire others to like

17:14

create their best work and and

17:16

and spoke to them about how to create

17:18

their best work and and and physically

17:21

could could do it as well.

17:22

You know, and and

17:24

and.

17:25

Also like would

17:27

like have their own shows and their own companies

17:29

and and would enable other people.

17:31

And Jim Brooks was someone that was for sure, you

17:34

know, judge him up under him and he's

17:36

so when I got to be around when I was younger, and.

17:38

He was almost was very he's very

17:40

degenerous in that.

17:41

Yeah, he's great, and he's kind of in a lot of ways, Yeah,

17:44

like one of the architects of really

17:46

being like a prolific writer,

17:48

director, producer of

17:52

of of people's work in that

17:54

way, you know, and and like a writing producer

17:56

in and of himself. So yeah,

17:59

it was I was very fortunate to

18:01

kind of get to be around these people at

18:03

a young age and kind of absorb.

18:05

Or did you have that kind of mentorship, Yeah,

18:08

a bit.

18:09

I mean I went to film school and so

18:11

you know it was very intentional to you

18:13

know, work, you know, as a

18:16

writer and producer. I came out of school actually

18:18

really being interested in producing, and I worked

18:20

for this producer named Steve

18:22

Starkey who was Robertson Echisil's producer

18:25

in the sort of Polar Express and Beowulf

18:28

Monster House years

18:30

and you know, learned

18:33

an incredible amount working at

18:35

this company that was making big movies

18:38

while simultaneously, Seth

18:40

and I had started dating at the time, so I would

18:43

I would leave work and then go to set

18:45

and sit on set and also get to observe

18:48

jud and SHAWNA. Robertson who was

18:50

producing those movies at the time, and so

18:54

very much. Yeah, had amazing

18:57

examples of people who could juggle you

18:59

know, the sort of creative side

19:02

of putting funny stories together,

19:04

but also you know, shepherding

19:06

other people and being supportive of

19:08

you know, people coming up and being

19:11

generous and teaching and listening and

19:14

offering guidance. And Yeah,

19:16

it's incredible to be able to have that

19:19

and to be around people like that.

19:22

Yeah, I was very lucky and fun

19:24

time for sure.

19:25

I want to say to the people that are

19:28

listening to this podcast. I

19:31

probably mentioned this before, but I have

19:34

zero regrets about my career

19:37

and my I'm just not somebody that looks

19:39

back and goes, oh shit, I wish I would have done this and done

19:42

except for the fact that

19:44

I never got the

19:47

concept of mentorship because

19:49

I was such a cocky little shit. I

19:52

thought there was nothing that anybody

19:54

could teach me. Teachers. I

19:57

couldn't stand being in class because

19:59

I was like, I don't I got

20:01

this. I got this even

20:03

you know, from my

20:05

parents' older actors

20:07

that I would meet now probably just I'm

20:10

sure I was absorbing things without

20:12

but I never really put myself in the situation

20:16

of going to somebody and saying,

20:18

you know, can I ask your advice on

20:20

something? And I think

20:22

that's I think that's

20:24

a really important thing for people

20:27

to do, as as young people er.

20:29

I mean, I think having a balance though. I think that like

20:32

confidence though, is key, and knowing

20:34

where you're going is key, and

20:36

so the fact that you had the confidence to,

20:39

you know, be like, I deserve to be here, I know what I'm

20:41

doing. I don't don't I don't need to listen to you helped

20:44

drive you to where you where you were and

20:46

are you know I would say

20:48

that my confidence, I didn't

20:50

have that confidence. I literally was like I

20:52

need to learn because I am not ready

20:56

until I was ready. And

20:58

so I think that, you know, it's important

21:00

to know I should in some

21:02

situations shut up and listen

21:04

and in some situations to say

21:06

like I've experienced and I've learned and I'm

21:09

ready to go.

21:10

Yeah, It's true.

21:11

That's what's hard about movies especially, is like

21:14

no one's right. It's all just like

21:17

who likes what more? And like who

21:19

who feels it speaks to their tastes more

21:22

and and and it is hard at times

21:24

to yeah, navigate what advice

21:26

you should take and what what advice is

21:29

just kind.

21:30

Of I'm trying to be better like at

21:32

this age, at this late age, I'm actually trying

21:34

to you know, especially, I think

21:37

part of it is my is my

21:39

wife's influence, because I mean really

21:41

down to like even directors,

21:43

do I really want direction?

21:45

Not really?

21:46

No one getting

21:50

direction?

21:50

When I was at.

21:53

I'm happy not to are you are

21:55

you really?

21:56

Yeah?

21:56

I've been on movies wherely like I real I'll be like

21:59

so I'd be like, it's been days since I've even spoken

22:01

to the director, and that is like.

22:03

You're good with that? Yes,

22:06

okay, I'm glad because I don't know that I don't know that. I

22:08

don't know that I've I've really uh talked

22:11

to other actors that feel that way. So I'm glad that somebody

22:13

else feeling glad. I can. Yeah,

22:17

he doesn't like being directed either,

22:19

just so you know.

22:20

And I don't like directing the actors. I don't

22:22

like talking about it.

22:23

I'm in general like time, I'd be like, if I

22:25

can avoid talking to them, I will just let them

22:27

do their thing, you know.

22:29

And I love it, like I want to get in there and be like, how

22:31

you know, let's talk about how we're going to do this, like

22:34

like that's I think, you know, one of the most

22:36

fun parts of it. And and

22:39

honestly like if you take like of course,

22:41

like a technical directing class like in a school,

22:43

like so much of it is how do you communicate

22:46

with the actors? So like to be

22:48

on set either as an actor and the director doesn't

22:50

talk to you, I'm like, where's the director, but

22:52

then also be the director and like to get the sense

22:54

that the actors like, I got this. You're like, okay,

22:58

I can take that, and I'm not going to say anything,

23:00

and I'm going to let them go because I know they know what they're doing,

23:02

you know.

23:03

The fatal man Stevens Fieldberg was like, I

23:05

don't want to talk to the actress ever about

23:07

the scene ever.

23:08

Basically the greatest.

23:09

Yeah.

23:09

And then but then when he did give you direction, it was terrified

23:12

because you're like, oh, no.

23:14

That's the greatest, that's the greatest.

23:16

Well here, yeah, it's that thing between

23:18

you Take one and take two. You see him get out of

23:20

the chair and start to stroll over towards a second

23:22

You're like, oh no, oh no,

23:24

no, can

23:27

we just go again? We just go again. I

23:29

can sense what you want. Uh.

23:33

The that's an interesting you

23:35

mentioned that moved. It's an interesting segment to

23:38

my other thing that I think is so fascinating.

23:41

I've often said that I would I would, Uh,

23:44

I would love to do more comedy,

23:46

but I would I would much

23:49

rather have been

23:51

a serious actor who then gets a

23:53

chance to do some comedy that have been

23:57

well known for being

23:59

a comedy the actor, because I think that the

24:01

transition, I don't know how you

24:03

feel about this in the other direction

24:06

is uh, is is tough.

24:09

I think that there's a there's something tied

24:11

up with audiences and what they

24:14

want to feel from from you

24:16

in that moment, you know, as the truck backs

24:18

up. I uh,

24:21

and you've been able to do that to uh,

24:24

to to kind of push past that

24:26

seth in in such a such a

24:28

great way with with you know, really

24:30

truly amazing dramatic

24:33

performances and all kinds of stretches,

24:36

you know, and uh into different you know,

24:38

walking in different people's shoes. And I wondered

24:40

if that was a had

24:43

a fight, if there was a fight to

24:45

do that, or if it just kind of happened naturally.

24:48

Uh No, there really wasn't. I

24:50

like it. It wasn't something that I

24:52

I.

24:52

Always like love comedy and

24:54

and and I was never like someone

24:57

who, like, uh,

25:00

I thought comedy was really always harder,

25:02

you know, and I would look at you

25:05

know, I would do dramatic scenes.

25:07

In comedies and they were always so much

25:09

easier.

25:10

Than the comedic scenes in the comedies,

25:12

you know, And so it wasn't

25:16

I was always like relieved, though I remember being like, oh,

25:18

it's like it's like the scene where like we break up,

25:20

and even that was hard because we would still trying

25:22

to make it funny. But like it, it

25:26

to me was not something I

25:28

ever honestly cared that much about.

25:30

And some of my good friends were getting

25:32

cast in dramatic films again, nominated

25:34

for Academy Awards, and I was very thrilled for them,

25:36

and I would look at them and do you like that just

25:40

isn't something I like need necessarily

25:42

like it. But

25:44

there are filmmakers that I love working with,

25:46

and I like dramatic film, but I'm

25:49

more I think Sarah

25:52

Pauley was the first one really who put me

25:54

in like a dramatic movie, in like a big

25:56

role in take This Waltz,

25:59

and it was like it

26:01

was interesting, Like I remember thinking it was

26:03

very weird that she wanted me to do it and

26:06

that she could have

26:08

her pick of so many more dramatic

26:11

actors, but she, like I

26:13

thought that I would work in a specific way.

26:15

And so.

26:17

But yeah, I don't like, Yeah,

26:19

it's not something I like long for.

26:22

You know, if I was only

26:24

making comedies forever, i'd

26:26

be happy.

26:26

It's just it's hard, you know, you

26:29

know, that's.

26:29

So fascinating I'm really

26:32

that's very very interesting. Yeah,

26:35

Lauren, can you tell us about Hilarity

26:37

for charity and and and what

26:40

your own personal connection to

26:42

this is. I want, I want to this

26:45

is this is why you guys are here today, and I want

26:47

to segue into that.

26:48

Yeah, So, unfortunately,

26:51

Alzheimer's was kind of a part of my life

26:53

always my on my mom's side, my

26:55

grandfather, her dad was diagnosed

26:58

when I was very young, before I was born, and

27:01

then after him, my

27:04

grandmother, my mom's mom, was diagnosed

27:06

with Alzheimer's also, and then

27:09

at my college graduation, when I was twenty

27:11

two and my mom was fifty two, she started

27:14

repeating herself and

27:16

you know, and it was one of those things that I just knew.

27:20

And by the time, just before her fifty

27:23

fifth birthday, she was diagnosed with I

27:26

guess like an earlier on set Alzheimer's,

27:29

which you know, coincided with when Seth and

27:31

I started dating. We you know, met when we were twenty

27:33

three,

27:35

and so

27:39

this really obviously hugely

27:41

colored a huge part of my life during

27:43

that time. And

27:45

you know, here I was across the country from my parents.

27:48

They were in Florida at the time, and

27:51

you know, I was trying to build my career and in

27:53

this relationship that was growing and sort

27:55

of get my feet on the ground here while

27:58

this was happening back home, and just

28:00

as many people do who face a diagnosis of

28:02

dementia, we were really scared and

28:04

didn't know where to turn. And my mom really

28:06

didn't want us to talk about it for the first couple of

28:09

years because she felt a lot of stigma

28:11

that stems from having dementia and

28:14

and I'm sure a lot of fear herself having seen

28:16

her parents go through it. But

28:18

eventually her disease progressed and Steth

28:20

and I started talking about it and

28:23

sharing what I was going through and what my family

28:25

was going through. And eventually

28:27

a friend was like, hey, let's

28:29

throw up a variety show since

28:32

you know, we were in the comedy area, and let's

28:34

raise some money for Alzheimer's research.

28:36

And I was like, whoa,

28:40

no, But then he persisted

28:42

and I said okay, and we did it. And that was

28:44

in twenty twelve, and through

28:47

that really realized that there

28:49

weren't a lot of young people talking about

28:51

Alzheimer's at that point. There a lot of people

28:54

talking about it in general, really and

28:56

other young people were like, oh, hey, I'm

28:59

also in my tw with a parent with it

29:01

or sometimes unfortunately younger than that, And

29:04

I was far from being alone and being

29:07

young and having a parent dealing with it, and that

29:09

we had this voice that we could use to

29:12

give other people a voice and

29:15

show them how to use their stories

29:17

to create advocacy

29:20

that was needed to explain this

29:22

disease and what it is like to be a caregiver

29:24

for this disease, but also to

29:27

teach people how to take care of

29:29

their brains and how to stay

29:32

healthy, and also help

29:35

caregivers who are going through it right

29:37

now and really make sure that they are getting the

29:39

support that they need to

29:41

navigate the very difficult

29:44

journey that most people who are cared for someone

29:46

Golzheimer's are going through.

29:49

Did you ever get a chance to talk to your

29:51

mother about it? Did she ever open up

29:53

about it? Yeah?

29:55

You know, we had conversations

29:57

early on. There was one sort of pivotal

30:00

conversation early on. This is

30:02

so funny how I get to it. But I had read

30:04

early on in like a teen magazine that the best place

30:06

to have a comfortable conversations with your parents

30:08

is in the car because ultimately you'll always

30:11

have to get out of the car, so the conversation

30:13

come to a natural end. So remember

30:15

one time I was home visiting and she and I

30:17

went to Target, and for whatever reason,

30:19

I brought it up on the way to Target.

30:21

So in the Target parking lot, we had this

30:24

very specific conversation

30:26

that I'll always remember, which was when

30:28

I asked her if she was scared, in

30:31

which she told me she wasn't scared for herself, but

30:33

she was scared for us because she

30:35

knew what we were going to go through and

30:37

that I was absolutely not to move home

30:40

to Florida to be with her, and I

30:42

was not to make my life

30:45

that I had been, you know, building towards take

30:47

a left turn and stop what I was doing

30:50

to take care of her the class

30:52

she wanted. Wow, that's what she was

30:54

was really selfless. She was giving

30:57

and caring and so you know, and

30:59

I was lucky to have Step there

31:02

to support me. And you know, like

31:05

I always said, like I was a caregiver for a caregiver

31:07

because my dad was my mom's primary caregiver. But

31:10

you know, at a lot of ways, Step was my caregiver.

31:12

And I was extremely lucky to have him there.

31:21

If you are inspired by today's episode,

31:23

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31:25

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31:27

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31:35

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31:53

I think this is a good moment to bring on. Amanda

31:55

Caesauta, who who U is?

31:58

The senior communications manager?

32:00

You are the SCM for hm

32:05

HFC. Thank you so

32:07

much for joining us, Amanda, thank you.

32:11

You know, there's something that

32:13

Lauren mentioned that I that I

32:16

found really interesting when I was reading about the Alzheimer's

32:21

and some of the research and some of the focus

32:24

that you guys are making, and

32:26

that is in this idea

32:28

of a preventative lifestyle.

32:32

This is something that I'd never really even

32:36

thought about brain health. I

32:38

mean, can you dig into that a little bit more

32:40

for people?

32:41

Yeah, it's definitely one of our main pillars

32:43

I think what separates us from a lot of other organizations

32:46

in the Alzheimer's space is some of the programs

32:49

that we offer and kind of the pillars that we're

32:51

built on. So the first obviously

32:53

to care for families and caregivers

32:56

impacted by it, as Len mentioned, the

32:58

second is to activate the generation of Alzheimer's

33:01

advocates, and then that third pillar is to

33:03

be a leader in the brain health space, particularly

33:06

brain health education. And I

33:08

think something that people would be surprised

33:11

to learn is that research suggests that four

33:13

and ten cases of dementia may be preventable

33:16

through lifestyle changes. And part

33:19

of this research is that twenty to thirty

33:21

years before the onset of symptoms of Alzheimer's

33:23

and dementia is when the disease actually

33:26

starts and it starts to build. So

33:28

by the time you get a diagnosis, you've been living

33:30

with the disease for decades. And

33:33

knowing that information, we really strive

33:35

to get education to younger folks

33:38

and to get young people caring about brain health education

33:40

so that when they are in their twenties and thirties,

33:42

they can be proactive and doing things that

33:44

support that. Lauren,

33:47

and you might have to help me. We have our five brain

33:49

health habits that kind of drive

33:51

all of our brain health education. So physical

33:54

exercise we write then, Yeah,

33:57

physical exercise is one of them. Emotional

33:59

will be is another. Nutrition.

34:03

What you eat in put in your body very important.

34:05

The biggest one that Lauren talks lots

34:08

about is sleep. And then what

34:10

is the fifth one that I'm missing?

34:11

Learn mental fitness, mental

34:14

things.

34:14

Yes, keeping your brain engaged. So an

34:17

example of that that we like to share is learning

34:19

a new language, like learning a new line, your brain

34:21

learning. Yeah. The more that you can learn

34:24

new things and activate your brain in that

34:26

way, the stronger connections you can make. Yeah,

34:29

we're very big on brain health, and there is a lot

34:31

that people can do that they don't even realize in

34:34

their day to day that can help that effort.

34:37

Seth, tell me a little bit about the hilarity

34:39

side of this. Yeah, I'm

34:42

curious about the idea of taking

34:44

something that is obviously you know, deep

34:46

and painful and as hard as as

34:49

Alzheimer's and you know, at

34:52

least finding a way in through humor.

34:54

Yeah.

34:54

I mean.

34:57

A lot of it is because it's just what we do, you

34:59

know.

35:00

And as we were putting together the show

35:02

for the first time, we

35:04

are comedians. All of our friends are comedians,

35:07

you know. Will actually the guy who introduced us, would

35:09

put on comedy variety shows.

35:11

It was kind of like an.

35:11

Environment we came up with, was was we

35:13

would always be going to these kind of comedy variety

35:16

shows all the time.

35:18

And so it at

35:20

first was kind of just organically

35:22

all we had to offer.

35:24

But over the years it has become

35:26

a much more kind of resonant,

35:29

like beautiful, uh like

35:31

approach to it. That that

35:33

that again, like looking back, is is

35:35

lovely and and the fact

35:38

that we were able to infuse such a sad

35:40

thing with humor, and that we're able to able

35:42

to bring whiteness to such a dark subject

35:46

and able to you kind of you

35:48

know, take people's minds off things

35:50

and with a spoonful of sugar, you know, like

35:53

kind of feed them information and

35:56

tips and lifestyle you know, habit

35:59

suggestions that in a way

36:01

that is entertaining and maybe a little

36:03

more lighthearted than this information

36:05

is generally conveyed with. Uh that

36:08

that yeah, that was never part of like the

36:10

grand plan. It's kind of

36:12

just who we are and what we had to offer

36:14

and and and it all came together in

36:16

that way. But if anything. Yeah,

36:20

Like, I think we've all been amazed at how organically

36:23

it does go together, and how comedians

36:27

especially are very charitable

36:30

with their time and are undaunted

36:32

by speaking about

36:36

or around incredibly

36:39

unhappy, traumatic things. That's

36:41

what comedy is, right, And

36:44

I remember, yeah,

36:46

honestly, I remember putting together one of the shows

36:49

and texting I think was John Mulaney

36:51

being like, you're coming on after something

36:53

that's like brutal, and he

36:55

was like, it's fine, Like he's like people,

36:58

He's like, people shift gears real fast. It's

37:00

totally not a problem, you know. And

37:03

so yeah, if anything, it kind

37:05

of has it seems

37:08

nice in retrospect and like we have this

37:10

grand plan to kind of change the tone

37:13

surrounding something so sad. But no,

37:16

it was just kind of who we were,

37:18

and we always we joke like if we were chefs, would

37:20

be called baking for charity, you know, but

37:24

unfortunately we're not.

37:27

Amanda, tell me about the other two

37:29

pillars.

37:30

Yeah, So the first, which

37:32

is kind of the heart and soul of our organization,

37:34

is to care for families impacted by Alzheimer's.

37:38

By twenty fifty, it's estimated that thirteen

37:40

million Americans over the age of sixty

37:42

five will have the disease, and that

37:44

is tripling the current amount of cases

37:46

that we have today. And I think another

37:49

big part of that is that with an increase

37:51

in people living with the disease, is the increase

37:53

of people caring for people living with the disease.

37:55

And right now there's already eleven

37:58

million Americans who provide on paid care.

38:00

So what we do at HFC

38:03

is try to be a resource hub for

38:05

folks wherever they are in the journey. So whether you

38:08

yourself have been newly diagnosed or you're a caregiver

38:10

who's been caring for someone for years with

38:12

the disease, we try to meet people where

38:14

they are through a variety of services.

38:17

Probably the biggest and kind of the

38:20

core of our work is our respite

38:22

grants, and what those are is folks can

38:24

apply and what it is is it's either

38:26

a short term grant where we collaborate

38:29

with a professional care

38:31

organization and if you are awarded

38:33

the grant, then someone would come to your home, a

38:35

professional caregiver to help relieve you. So it's

38:38

meant to take the burden of caregiving off

38:40

the caregiver just for a little We

38:42

also have extended grants, so that's like more long

38:45

term assistance that you'd have, but we

38:48

found that it's just much needed

38:50

respite. Like caregivers are very burnt out and

38:52

it is such a taxing job

38:54

and responsibility, and to even have the

38:57

time to go to the grocery store

38:59

or to have a night out with friends can be

39:01

monumental in giving them a little

39:03

bit more fuel so that they can continue caring for

39:06

the person that they love. Which

39:09

in addition to the care grants, we also have

39:12

a lot of online opportunities.

39:14

Since caregivers are everywhere and

39:16

very busy and we're a national organization, we have

39:18

workshops, We have our main

39:20

event every year, which is care Con, which

39:23

is coming up this February, actually

39:25

on Valentine's Day this year, So shout

39:27

out to all the caregivers and

39:30

those are all meant to kind

39:33

of speaking to what Seth said, one educate

39:35

them, so give them resources and maybe tips and chicks

39:37

that they might not have known about in caregiving, and

39:39

to give them a space to just be entertained

39:42

and to laugh and to

39:44

find community with people who get it, because it's

39:46

a really isolating experience and

39:49

not everyone understands what

39:51

it looks like to care for someone and when you meet

39:53

someone who does, it's a really special thing.

39:56

So that's one of them, caring for caregivers,

39:59

and then the other one that's pretty exciting,

40:01

and I think we're one of a few organizations

40:03

doing it is activating the next generation

40:06

of Alzheimer's advocates. So we

40:09

have a program right now

40:11

called the Youth Movement Against Alzheimer's and

40:14

we have high school and college chapters

40:16

all across the country of kids who, either

40:19

through personal connection or maybe

40:21

careers that they want to get into, they have a passion

40:23

for Alzheimer's and dementia and they want

40:25

to advocate on

40:28

behalf of the disease and people living with the disease.

40:30

And it's a big part of what we do

40:32

is making sure that those young people are equipped

40:35

to put that message out into the world

40:38

to help educate their peers on what they can do

40:40

around brain health. It

40:43

kind of all funnels back into that idea

40:45

of prevention that if we can get people educated

40:48

and inspired earlier, we'll all be

40:50

better off in the long run.

40:53

AMaGA, let me ask you a question. Obviously

40:56

you're very committed

40:58

to this, do you think

41:00

it was in your life personally

41:03

that made you want to, you

41:05

know, be in this line of work. Yeah,

41:08

I mean, you know, be work in

41:10

the in the cause based space.

41:12

I'm always fascinated when you know, being

41:15

someone who that was never

41:18

an option that I considered as a young

41:20

man. I'm always fascinated with with people

41:22

that really have have chosen

41:24

to to to make this

41:26

their their work.

41:28

Yeah. I think it was modeled for me

41:30

by my parents just in our lifestyle.

41:32

They were really big on helping others,

41:35

So we've had countless friends and families

41:37

stay at our home throughout the years. And I think for my

41:39

sister and I, she's in the medical field, so she does

41:42

servanthood in her own way. We

41:44

just thought modeled for us. My mom especially was really

41:46

big on teaching us that if you have the means

41:48

and the ability you help others, that's what

41:50

you do. And I think I learned early

41:53

on the gratification that you

41:55

feel and that you get from helping other people.

41:57

And I felt pretty convinced, I

42:00

mean out of call it is that if I didn't do work that

42:02

was tied to a purposeful

42:04

mission, I wouldn't be fulfilled. And I wouldn't be

42:06

able to show up and really love what I do. Hilarity

42:10

for charity is the sweet spot of all the things that

42:12

I love. I get to be very creative

42:14

here. I get to help others,

42:17

and it's a cause that I have personal

42:19

experience with, and I get to, you know, help people

42:21

who are in the same position as myself and my

42:23

family.

42:24

M hm, that's that's that's great.

42:26

I also have to say that I'm so touched

42:28

with the notion of Seth

42:33

becoming the caregiver for the caregiver you

42:36

mentioned that, Lord, and I just want to circle

42:38

back to that because I I,

42:40

I mean, obviously there is a I'm

42:44

gonna call it trickle down, but there's a there's a there's

42:46

a ripple effect when somebody in somebody.

42:49

I'd call it a black hole, right

42:54

the exactly.

42:56

Yeah, it's it is, you know, that's

42:58

that's that's part of what marriages, that's

43:01

part of what family is, you know.

43:03

And yeah, it was really

43:06

yeah, it was. It was one of those things

43:08

though, like it was so sad, and.

43:12

You know, I remember suggesting Laura go to therapy.

43:14

That was a big that was a

43:16

defining moment, I would say, and you

43:18

know, uh forward,

43:21

because I was just literally unequipped

43:24

to deal with how sad the situation

43:26

was. Like it wasn't like normal like hard

43:29

day at work sad, like my

43:31

boss is an asshole sad. It was like outside

43:34

the scope of what I was equipped

43:37

to understand how to deal

43:39

with effectively, you know. And

43:42

and then also it was one of those things where like money

43:45

just helped, and that's why we

43:48

made these grants, where like Lauren's

43:50

father was just like getting worked

43:52

to death, and then we hired

43:55

these people, and all of a sudden, like

43:58

everyone's lives was much better

44:01

in like a tangible way.

44:02

And so.

44:04

Yeah, like this idea that you

44:07

know, just there's

44:09

a very like immediate way

44:11

to relieve the pressure of these caregivers

44:14

because also like caregiving is also

44:17

you know, like the caregiver dies before the

44:19

person they are caring for, often because

44:22

of the toll it takes. And

44:24

and and that really seemed to be you

44:27

know, what would was what

44:29

could have happened to Lauren's father and so and

44:32

and and then yeah, and then like the emotional

44:34

effect it had on Lauren obviously because

44:36

both of her parents were going through this terrible thing.

44:38

So yeah, it does create this kind of

44:40

like black hole that you

44:42

really have to fight against the gravitational

44:45

pull of you know.

44:47

Yeah, well, I want

44:49

to give you an opportunity, both Lauren

44:51

and Amanda to you know, say

44:54

how people listening to this can get involved,

44:56

can help. This is our call

44:58

to action to you

45:01

know, just see how what people can

45:03

do.

45:05

Do you want to kiss? Sure?

45:07

I mean, look, the first thing that

45:09

can help is by donating money.

45:12

You know, we are able to fund I think it's twenty

45:15

seven percent or something of our applications

45:17

that we received for our restpen programs. I would

45:19

love to be able to fund more. However,

45:22

it's not only money where we need

45:25

the help. The simplest thing someone

45:27

can do is share a story. If you're a caregiver,

45:30

telling your friends, telling your family, sharing

45:32

your story on social media. Making

45:35

the reality of caring for someone with dementia

45:37

part of the conversation so that people understand

45:41

what it actually means to care for someone with dementia

45:44

is huge to push the conversation

45:46

forward because part of the reason

45:48

that dementia Alzheimer's research

45:51

was underfunded for so long by the government

45:53

was because no one talked about it. In the last

45:55

ten years, that's changed the reality of the situation

45:58

has forced the government to step up with more funding

46:00

in the areas of scientific research. So caregiving

46:04

is still unfortunately behind, and

46:07

so sharing our stories about

46:09

the need for the support we need for caregivers,

46:12

hopefully we'll shift the conversation

46:15

to give caregivers the support they need.

46:18

So I would say it's donations,

46:21

it's advocacy, it's sharing

46:23

our information on social media with

46:25

a friend who you know needs it. It's sharing

46:27

the fact that you know we have a support

46:29

group. We have support groups for so many different

46:32

types of people, and so

46:35

so yeah, donating, sharing, Amanda,

46:38

what else.

46:39

Yeah, obviously donating and

46:41

sharing. I think another big thing is learn

46:44

how to care for your brain. I mean, the crisis

46:46

of care is going to impact everyone

46:49

on a big scale, the economy. We're

46:51

not ready for the amount of care

46:53

that's going to need to be provided in the coming years.

46:55

And we can tackle

46:57

that by selling

47:00

those lifestyle habits that can help towards preventions.

47:02

So check out we are HFC dot org.

47:05

We've got lots of resources about all the brain

47:07

health habits that you can do. We even have

47:09

a lovely recording of seth

47:11

if you want to soothe yourself to sleep with the

47:13

voices that brogan you can.

47:19

Definite Yeah.

47:21

I would encourage everyone check out our website,

47:23

find out the simple things that you can start changing

47:25

to help improve

47:28

your brain health with those habits, and

47:30

then if there's any caregivers

47:32

listening out here, know that we're here to support you wherever

47:34

you are on your journey. Please connect with us either

47:36

through the website or on social media. We are

47:39

at we are HFC across all social

47:41

platforms, and we also have

47:44

our major event, our virtual event care

47:46

Con, coming up this February on Valentine's

47:48

Day, so please join us even if you're

47:50

not a caregiver. I think another aspect

47:53

of this issue was that caregivers

47:55

feel isolated because people don't know how to

47:57

support someone who's caring for someone with

47:59

all sign and we've got a lot of

48:01

tools to even help the non trigivers know how

48:03

to better love and support the people in their lives

48:05

who are doing the caregiving.

48:08

That's awesome. I want to

48:10

thank you guys so much, Seth, Lauren,

48:13

Amanda, thank you so much foranking here today.

48:15

Thanks for having us. It's really fun to

48:18

to chat with you guys, and I

48:20

love the sport that you're doing and

48:23

and you know, keep up the good work. It's

48:25

it's just fantastic stuff. So thank you,

48:27

thank.

48:27

You, thank you, thank you so much.

48:32

Hey, everybody, thanks for listening to another

48:34

episode of Six Degrees with

48:36

Kevin Bacon. To learn more

48:38

about Hilarity for Charity. I

48:41

love that name and all the great works

48:43

Seth, Lauren and their team are up to head

48:45

to their website. We are h

48:48

FC dot org. That's

48:50

we are h FC dot

48:53

org. You can find all the links in

48:55

our show notes and hey,

48:58

if you like what you need, make sure

49:00

that you subscribe to the show and tune

49:02

in to the rest of our episodes. You

49:04

can find six Degrees with Kevin Bacon on iHeartRadio,

49:08

Apple Podcasts, or wherever

49:11

you get your podcasts. I

49:13

see you next time.