0:00

Sophia Franklin. You are listening

0:02

to Sophia with an F

0:04

and the F is for

0:07

phenomenal. This

0:11

podcast is rated F.

0:14

Everything in life is a trade

0:16

-off. If you want to be

0:19

married to the guy that is

0:21

going to be very successful, the

0:24

trade -off is he's going to be

0:26

at work. So,

0:30

Fia learned a new word today, guys.

0:33

How do we do this for Sesame Street?

0:35

The word of the day is finna. Mommy's

0:45

the word, but we're

0:47

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1:53

to Sophia with an F. I'm

1:55

sitting here with my flesh and

1:57

blood, my favorite person and essentially

2:00

my co -host Alex.

2:03

How are it though? I'm doing great.

2:05

Thank you for that introduction. I loved

2:07

it. You're very welcome. Alex

2:09

and I just got

2:11

done talking to my

2:14

significant other. I

2:16

can't bring myself to call on my

2:19

boyfriend. That's like too crazy. That's too...

2:22

That's too major. It's like

2:24

I might as well say

2:26

I was just talking to

2:28

my husband, my baby daddy.

2:31

Okay, so you'd rather refer

2:33

to him as your baby

2:36

daddy over your boyfriend? Yes,

2:38

because I have commitment issues.

2:42

I also don't want people

2:44

to think I'm off the

2:46

market. That's

2:50

some shit. I'm not sure he's going to want

2:52

to hear that. Okay. No, but

2:54

I get it. Like I'd never,

2:56

ever, ever, ever post my boyfriend.

2:59

It's in real. It's not like

3:01

because I'm trying to hide that

3:04

I'm off the market. So maybe

3:06

that's something else. No, I was

3:08

obviously fucking around. It's I don't

3:11

I don't like to say that

3:13

in such a public setting as

3:15

this one. Like if

3:17

we, oh my god, we went,

3:20

Alex and I went to my

3:22

friend's going away dinner party thing

3:24

and I would not shut the

3:27

fuck up. No, you would not.

3:29

About having a boyfriend. Oh

3:32

wait, really? Yes. I didn't hear that. I

3:34

just heard you wouldn't shut the fuck up

3:36

and I was like, yes. But

3:39

you didn't shut the fuck up

3:42

about your boyfriend. There were only

3:44

two things I was talking about.

3:46

My current boyfriend and then like

3:48

little funny remarks about my ex

3:50

-boyfriend. That's true. And becoming that

3:52

girl by entire personality is just

3:54

the men I date. Well,

3:57

that's okay because the two men that

3:59

you date were more entertaining than the

4:01

18 other guys that were there. That's

4:05

some real shit. day

4:09

to day life, I

4:12

talk about him. For

4:15

whatever reason, on socials

4:17

and shit, I just, I

4:20

don't feel a need. And

4:22

also because we have decided

4:24

for right now, at least

4:26

to just like keep things

4:28

private. And I think

4:31

the second I start talking

4:33

about having a boyfriend and

4:35

shit, it opens it up

4:37

to people

4:39

being weirdos and figuring out whoever

4:42

the fuck he is, you know?

4:45

Right. And then I have an issue

4:47

on my hands. Right. Okay.

4:50

You have a boyfriend though, so. Yeah, I

4:53

have a boyfriend. So that was really fun.

4:55

I'm glad. I like a lot. What

4:57

did you think about that phone call? I

5:00

think that he really, really, really

5:03

fucking loves you. Yeah. I

5:06

think... cut this.

5:08

I think he really really

5:11

really really has money. Yeah,

5:14

which As much as

5:16

you want to joke

5:18

around About the bank

5:20

account on the first

5:23

day this guy checks

5:25

that box he checks

5:27

it off with Flying

5:29

color permanent marker. Mm

5:32

-hmm. We can agree that

5:34

Financial is above Looks

5:37

right. Are you

5:39

any women who are still

5:42

out here trying to land

5:44

the hot guy or wondering

5:47

why the sexy guy is

5:49

not responding to them? Grow

5:51

up. Love yourself enough to

5:54

realize those guys don't fucking

5:56

matter gum on the bottom

5:59

of my shoe. The only

6:01

dudes that matter are the

6:03

ones that. you're

6:06

gonna feel safe with because they

6:08

take care of your heart and

6:10

they take care of you. Let

6:13

me ask you this though, because everything in

6:15

life is a trade -off, right?

6:18

If you want to

6:20

be married to the

6:22

guy that is gonna

6:24

be very successful, the

6:27

trade -off is he's gonna

6:29

be at work. So

6:33

feel learned a new word today,

6:35

guys. How do we do this for

6:38

Sesame Street? The letter of the

6:40

day, I'm sorry, the word of the day

6:42

is finna. Urban

6:44

dictionary, what does it

6:46

say? I would say

6:49

it says the likes

6:51

of finna to do

6:53

the act. So

6:57

in a context example, how did

6:59

you use it? I

7:02

said, I finna

7:05

the dishes. That's

7:07

not how you would use it. I know

7:09

how to use it. We're finna go to

7:11

the fucking bodega. know, but then what do you say?

7:14

I finna the bodega? No.

7:16

No, no, no. I'm finna

7:19

head to the bodega. Okay.

7:21

So I know that that

7:23

word and slang became a

7:26

thing years and years and

7:28

years ago. Right. And it's

7:31

no longer a fucking thing.

7:34

I find it really, really,

7:36

really, really, really, really funny

7:38

to use outdated words, to

7:40

use cringy terminology, and to

7:43

use it completely wrong. Okay.

7:46

Well, I'm pretty sure I used

7:48

that seriously and recently, but that

7:50

might just be the Gen Z

7:52

in me. But where were we?

7:54

We were talking about trade -offs.

7:56

Right. Everything in life comes with

7:59

a trade -off. Right. So if

8:01

you want to be with a

8:03

guy that is uber successful, he's

8:07

going to be at work. It

8:09

was so hard for me to

8:11

not just say Phena. He's going

8:14

to be working around the clock.

8:16

Therefore, he will not be home

8:18

with you that fucking often to

8:21

help you raise your kids to

8:23

spend quality time with you, to

8:26

spend quality time with the kids.

8:29

And it's like, I don't know,

8:31

like what is more important? I

8:33

was having this conversation with one

8:35

of my really good friends and

8:37

she said, she

8:40

straight up told me, she was like,

8:42

so I grew up with a dad

8:44

who was a pilot who was gone

8:46

two weeks out of the month. And

8:49

she said that her mom really struggled

8:51

with that, that her and her brother

8:54

struggled with like not seeing their dad

8:56

that much and that Now

8:58

in her relationships, it's

9:00

very important that she's

9:02

with a guy that

9:04

can fucking be home

9:06

and be helping. interesting.

9:10

Because when you first said that, I was like,

9:12

that sounds like my fucking wet dream. What?

9:15

I'm with someone who's

9:17

financially stable or. Yeah.

9:19

But like financially comfortable.

9:22

Yeah. And he's just at

9:24

work all the time. Thank fucking God. There's

9:26

no one else I love more than myself.

9:28

There's no one else I have more

9:31

fun with than myself. I love being

9:33

by myself. I fucking love it. Then

9:35

on top of that, I am in

9:37

an incredible relationship where I can get

9:40

whatever I want. Not necessarily, but

9:42

like comfortable. Yeah. Sounds like a

9:44

win. But then you brought in the kids. Right.

9:48

Well, then at that point, then we bring in a nanny.

9:51

I guess like you

9:53

have a nanny but

9:55

I think I'm underestimating

9:57

how hard it is

9:59

to not only have

10:01

kids but to also

10:03

try to have a

10:05

job as well. I

10:08

mean people are out here doing

10:10

just that. I know and they're

10:13

doing it and it's it's just

10:15

insane to me and I think

10:17

I'm gonna always have to have

10:20

my own Stream of income hundred

10:22

percent, you know, I'm always gonna

10:25

need that I think I mean

10:27

this could change but I think

10:29

the stay -at -home mom thing

10:32

Would be very fulfilling and I

10:34

want to spend a lot of

10:37

time with my kids But I

10:39

also just feel like I need

10:41

to have that little something on

10:44

the side. That's just my own.

10:46

Yeah, for sure So

10:49

if you, if we're talking that and

10:51

I have to, I can barely work

10:53

as it is now. So

10:56

that's fucking real. Not saying that you

10:58

can't work right now, but like I

11:00

feel that. I mean, last night we

11:03

were going to do some work shit

11:05

and I was just like, no, I

11:07

can't do it. Like I don't feel

11:10

good. I just got way too tired.

11:12

We're not doing it. So

11:14

A, when you have kids, you can't. be

11:16

like, oh, I have a tummy ache. I'm

11:18

gonna just sit this one out. Like

11:21

go make mommy her Pepto

11:23

-Bismol vodka drink. And

11:26

like your kids are crying and they're starving. Like,

11:28

so that doesn't work. And then

11:31

to also add a job on

11:33

top of that, I could see

11:35

myself getting pretty fucking frustrated if

11:38

my husband was just like, you

11:40

know, strolling in 10

11:42

p .m. saying

11:44

he needs to go straight to bed. I

11:47

got to. So I don't know. It's

11:49

something to think about. Well, you're going

11:51

to have to think about it soon

11:54

because I think you're going to get

11:56

those years are approaching at a rapid

11:58

speed. There's just this

12:00

big fucking elephant in the room,

12:02

which is I want all of

12:05

these things. I want it with

12:07

this guy. He does

12:09

not live in America. He

12:12

lives in Europe, okay? This

12:16

whole thing. I don't know

12:18

even how to really fully

12:21

proceed with my own life

12:23

here. Yeah. Like, can I

12:25

tell you what? Like, can I explain

12:27

it to you? Yeah. So the plan,

12:30

he can't up and leave because

12:33

of his job. Right. I'm very

12:35

fortunate where I can technically do

12:37

this job from wherever and even

12:40

if I can't because it's like

12:42

yes technically I can do it

12:44

from wherever but you know I

12:47

have to go to Los Angeles

12:49

I have to be in New

12:51

York there's certain places I just

12:54

have to be but as soon

12:56

as I wrap up I can

12:59

head back to Europe you know

13:01

right like there's nothing making it

13:03

so that I straight up cannot

13:06

move from here I can absolutely

13:08

move great however Do

13:10

I want to? How am I

13:12

going to feel living in Europe? And,

13:15

you know, my friends and

13:17

my family are not there

13:19

unless I'm flying them in.

13:22

Right. Which is what I basically

13:24

already do. Right. But it's still

13:27

like a whole, you know. Well,

13:29

I think it's time to get

13:31

uncomfortable. Oh, okay.

13:33

I kind of like that.

13:35

But it's doing this weird

13:38

thing where In my

13:40

day to day life, I

13:42

feel like I'm in limbo

13:44

because there's all of these

13:47

things that I want to

13:49

do. And then

13:51

I think to myself, well,

13:53

you're to be doing this

13:56

exact same thing in Europe

13:58

in six months from now,

14:01

in a year from now. So

14:03

why would you like put time,

14:05

money, energy into this thing here?

14:07

Let me give you an example.

14:10

My apartment. I've

14:12

decided that obviously I'm going to

14:15

furnish it and design it and

14:17

buy all the art and complete

14:19

it 100%. I would be lying

14:21

if I told you I'm not

14:24

kind of dragging my feet a

14:26

little bit because he is talking

14:28

about this other apartment in Europe

14:30

that we're going to live in.

14:33

Yeah. So he

14:35

bought you an apartment over there. Okay,

14:38

he didn't buy me an apartment. He

14:41

rented an apartment. Okay, so what you're saying

14:43

is like you might be dragging your feet

14:45

a little bit on finishing, furnishing

14:48

and doing the art

14:50

for this apartment because

14:52

you have a whole

14:55

nother apartment to worry

14:57

about in a different

14:59

country with your partner.

15:02

Yes. Well, I think

15:04

we know where the long term

15:06

lies. My life, I just kind

15:08

of feel like it's like a little I got a

15:10

fork? Kind of. Yes. Yes.

15:13

And you know what Robert Frost would tell

15:15

me to do right now? What? Take the

15:17

road less taken. Which can't

15:19

go to motherfucking Europe, is what he

15:21

would say. All right, well, you don't

15:24

want to disappoint Mr. Frost, do you?

15:26

don't. I don't want to disappoint him.

15:28

You can just leave this place for

15:30

me. I'll keep it warm

15:32

for ya. I'll enjoy the art.

15:35

The furniture's great. Loving

15:37

the dead cow right

15:39

here. Yeah, this

15:41

is a vegan's dream, this cow hide rug. You

15:44

know that I spent days making

15:46

sure I got a cow hide

15:48

rug that was done ethically? Like

15:52

it wasn't like the cow was killed

15:54

to make a rug. it

15:56

was done in a humane

15:59

-ish way. I don't remember

16:01

exactly what, but I did.

16:04

I'm just gonna pretend you

16:06

didn't say that and keep

16:09

going. Okay, we're gonna move

16:11

on from my fucking life

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18:40

Sometimes I want to talk to you about certain

18:42

things. And then

18:44

I stop myself because I'm

18:46

like, is that just a

18:48

specific to Sophia and Alex?

18:51

So nuanced, so

18:53

fucking out there, so bananas that

18:56

no one else will pick up

18:58

what we're laying down. That's

19:00

so interesting. Cause I feel like it's correct

19:02

as if we're wrong. We kind of be

19:05

on some. Shit that

19:07

some people don't relate to so

19:09

the fact that you are saying

19:11

that you're hesitant It makes me

19:13

I want to know what are

19:15

you talking about? Try the sleuths.

19:17

I'm gonna try the sleuths and

19:19

sleuths This is not me being

19:22

like oh my god. We're just

19:24

like on our fucking bullshit and

19:26

no one can keep up what

19:28

I mean is sometimes You get

19:30

so insular with a person and

19:33

so deranged. Crazy,

19:36

psychotic, sick in the

19:38

fucking head. Yes. But

19:40

I guess, honestly, it's like anyone who

19:42

has a sister, I

19:44

feel like you guys have these

19:47

inside jokes and just weird things

19:49

that only your sister would understand

19:51

what the fuck you're trying to

19:53

say. But this

19:55

is what I was thinking

19:58

about. don't

20:01

always mean what I say. Right.

20:05

When it comes to

20:07

dudes. Right. Of

20:10

course, I don't think I've ever

20:12

said any truths to a man.

20:14

Thank you. The

20:16

thing is, is now that

20:18

I'm trying to be in

20:21

a healthy relationship, I'm starting

20:23

to try to reel it

20:25

back in and be an

20:28

adult. For example,

20:31

We were just on FaceTime with my boyfriend. I

20:35

told him that verbatim, these

20:37

words are what came out

20:39

of my mouth. I

20:42

don't feel like I have a

20:44

boyfriend. I feel like I'm single.

20:48

And if I don't feel like I

20:50

have a boyfriend, like, what are we

20:52

doing? I said some crazy shit in

20:54

that same thing. Yeah, which out

20:56

of nowhere. I mean, the only thing

20:59

that's going on, you guys, is

21:01

he's just in another country. And

21:03

she's like, I feel single. Like,

21:05

do I even have a boyfriend?

21:07

Like, do you even feel like

21:09

my boyfriend? Like, the

21:12

only thing he's doing wrong, which

21:14

isn't fucking wrong is he's literally

21:16

just across the way. Yeah. But

21:18

to you, it doesn't even feel

21:21

that way, or you're just saying

21:23

it to say it. So

21:26

me saying. to

21:28

my boyfriend point blank. I

21:31

don't feel or think

21:33

I have a boyfriend.

21:36

Therefore, I will think

21:38

and feel as if

21:40

I'm single translates to

21:42

I am feeling distant

21:45

from you. I'm feeling

21:47

like I really need

21:49

reassurance from you. And

21:51

can you please tell

21:54

me right now that

21:56

you're in love with me, that

21:59

there's a future here, that

22:02

this is real, and

22:04

you love me more today than

22:06

you did the day you met

22:08

me. So you're insecure?

22:11

I guess. Interesting.

22:14

Which is really interesting because

22:16

he is so loving, so

22:18

kind. making it

22:21

very clear. Maybe

22:23

he's not making it clear. He's not,

22:25

but he's not. This is the thing,

22:27

Alec. But he's just keeping his coys

22:29

just being normal. But I guess the

22:31

issue lies with you being the opposite

22:34

of normal and you being fucking deranged

22:36

and crazy. That's true. But

22:38

I think a lot of girls are

22:40

out here like saying, do you love

22:42

me to their boyfriends? And I would

22:44

I see that all over TikTok. like

22:47

guys imitating their girlfriends. They're like, do

22:49

you still love me? Yeah. So I

22:52

don't think you're alone in that sense,

22:54

but I do think like he's like, oh, I'm

22:57

just at work, baby. Like what are you doing?

22:59

And you're like, I just feel like I don't

23:01

have a boyfriend. Like I

23:03

feel single. He's

23:05

like, what the literal

23:07

fuck. So anytime

23:09

a girl asks a guy,

23:11

do you love me, baby?

23:14

My version of that is I

23:16

don't feel like I have a

23:19

boyfriend and I'm a finna be

23:21

acting like I'm single. I'm

23:24

a motherfucking city girl. And

23:27

that as well. Like what? You feel like

23:29

you're for the streets? No.

23:32

What are we talking

23:34

about? If you're single, you're

23:36

in the streets. Yeah. Take

23:39

me out the club. Take me

23:41

out the market. I'm

23:43

trying to hit the group chat. Tell

23:46

them it's on facts. So,

23:50

yeah. So I think

23:52

that the majority of people would

23:54

say, would ask the questions if

23:56

they're having an insecurity flare up.

23:58

Do you love me? Or,

24:03

yeah, do you love me? They

24:05

would ask it. They would be direct and they

24:07

would ask that question. Instead,

24:11

I come in like a

24:13

bat out of hell saying

24:15

fucking, uh, I don't think

24:17

I have a boyfriend. I'm single by, oh, and

24:19

then I, and then I proceeded to basically just

24:21

get off the phone. Right.

24:23

So I want to

24:26

work on that. But

24:28

my question is you

24:30

and I speak the

24:33

same language and you

24:35

used to talk crazy

24:38

to dudes. Yeah.

24:40

I noticed that now

24:43

in your relationship you

24:45

don't like you're not

24:47

saying crazy wild out

24:49

-of -pocket shit the

24:52

way that I'm still

24:54

doing so I want

24:56

to know what's changed

24:59

well two things okay

25:01

first thing which is

25:06

I don't want to say I'm more

25:08

secure than you are. Well, no, I

25:10

assumed that you must feel more secure.

25:13

But I mean, probably in the

25:15

relationship, you definitely feel more secure

25:18

than how I do in mine.

25:20

Yeah. So there's that. But

25:23

also, because you're

25:25

right, you and I do speak the same

25:27

language. We really do. And

25:29

I feel like I was speaking that

25:32

kind of language. And my boyfriend one

25:34

day was like, And

25:37

his opinion doesn't sway me in

25:39

any direction. It means nothing But

25:41

he said well, but when they

25:43

have a point and you know,

25:45

you're kind of being just crazy

25:47

Sometimes it's like oh he sat

25:49

me down. He's like mm -hmm.

25:51

That's not cute guys Don't think

25:53

it's cute. It's not funny. I

25:55

don't think it's funny. No one

25:57

else would think that's funny I

25:59

do so you need to stop

26:01

that because I don't appreciate it.

26:03

I was like Oh.

26:07

Oh. Uh, okay.

26:10

So you don't think me saying,

26:12

like, I'm gonna wear a slutty

26:14

outfit and walk down the street

26:16

and see who kidnaps me, isn't

26:18

funny? Okay. Well, tone that

26:21

down a notch. So

26:25

maybe that's kind of why. And I, you

26:27

know, believe it or not, I do respect

26:29

him and I love him more than anything

26:31

in the world. So I did. tone

26:34

down the craziness at least in

26:36

front of him. I

26:38

think it's phenomenal that you

26:40

did because it's not like

26:42

you're right. It's like funny

26:45

to you and I. No

26:48

one else finds it funny. And

26:50

we laugh enough as it is. Like

26:52

we don't we really don't need to

26:54

be talking fucking crazy for like our

26:56

amusement, especially if it's

26:58

hurtful to people we

27:01

love. Emphasis on

27:03

hurtful. Yeah. So

27:05

Sophie and I just found out there's other people

27:07

in this world that aren't us. And

27:10

we're learning as we go.

27:12

I think I've just, I

27:15

really have thought men are

27:17

robots. They

27:19

are, in a sense. Like

27:21

I really just forget that

27:23

men are human beings that

27:26

actually have feelings and emotions

27:28

and intellect. And

27:30

I've been walking around treating them

27:32

like they're NPCs. And

27:34

it's like they, oh

27:37

my God, I almost just said his name. My

27:41

boyfriend, he needs a

27:44

name once and fucking for all. I cannot. I don't

27:46

like whatever name you gave him last time, James. I

27:48

don't even remember. I don't fucking fucking fucking know. know.

27:50

I I know. know. know. I fucking know. I know.

27:58

I What rolls off

28:00

the tongue? His real

28:02

name. Sam. All right.

28:05

All these white guys are like

28:07

listening, like, carrying their name. Brad.

28:10

What's like another, I always

28:12

say Brad. To say my

28:15

boyfriend. Okay. My boyfriend made

28:17

it clear to me. I

28:20

felt bad, okay, when I

28:22

got off the call. So when

28:24

I got in the studio, I called

28:26

him back and I said, Hi,

28:29

I just wanted to say, I just

28:32

wanted to make sure that you

28:34

weren't mad at me. And he

28:36

said, I'm not mad at you.

28:38

I do find it a bit

28:40

offensive when you say things that.

28:42

Oh, he didn't hear that part.

28:45

Offensive. He used the word offensive.

28:49

Okay, well, you don't want to offend anyone. But

28:51

it's so crazy. How does

28:53

he not understand? It's

28:56

not a dig. It's not me

28:58

being a bitch. Me saying I'm

29:00

single and I feel like I

29:02

don't have a boyfriend is literally

29:05

me saying I'm so obsessed with

29:07

you that I need you to

29:09

let me know that the feeling

29:11

is mutual. Right. Which

29:14

people always say that actions speak

29:16

louder than words, but in your

29:18

case, it sounds like you need

29:21

the words more than the actions

29:23

because this guy got you an

29:25

apartment. Right. He just bought

29:27

you a plot of land. X,

29:31

Y, Z. And

29:33

you're like, I just don't feel

29:35

like you're my boyfriend, which you're

29:38

needing the words more than the

29:40

actions, which is completely different than

29:42

what like society says. That's really

29:44

smart, Alex. That's

29:47

like a very

29:49

intelligent takeaway. Thank

29:51

you. And I agree with you,

29:53

which is very interesting because one

29:55

can look at that and say,

29:58

well, it's a lot easier to say, I

30:00

love you. I love you. I love you.

30:02

You mean the world to me than to

30:04

provide housing. Yeah.

30:08

Yeah. But one way is heavier than

30:10

the other one for you. And

30:13

I think that just goes

30:15

to say, like, you know,

30:18

whatever you went through in

30:20

the past and Shit is

30:22

why you are the way

30:25

that you are so it's

30:27

not necessarily wrong. Well, I

30:29

think that the actions are

30:32

also Happening in this like

30:34

faraway imaginary land in my

30:36

brain because we're long distance,

30:39

right? No, you're a hundred

30:41

percent right. I get very

30:45

obsessive and clingy about

30:47

words. And in my

30:49

last relationship, I dated a guy who

30:51

every 30 seconds was giving me reassurance.

30:54

You're so beautiful. You're so hot. I

30:56

love you so much. You're so perfect.

30:58

You can do nothing wrong. I would

31:00

die without you. I don't know how

31:03

I could live without you. And it

31:05

was just like, you know, yeah, around

31:07

the clock 24 seven. Yeah.

31:10

I don't think that that's

31:12

what I want. But

31:14

it's what I'm used

31:16

to and so I

31:18

just need to I

31:20

need to check myself

31:22

Because because you're right

31:25

words are just words

31:27

at the end of

31:29

the day and I

31:31

I actually think When

31:33

you're doing that and

31:35

it's like you're really

31:37

bombarding someone with Love

31:39

language That's also a

31:41

little bit scary, too.

31:44

Right. It's like, OK,

31:46

is this aligning with all

31:48

the other shit that you're

31:50

supposed to do for me

31:52

or be for me? And

31:54

you're right, actions at the end the day are

31:57

more important. So that's just

31:59

a little bit about me.

32:01

But I really like that

32:03

your boyfriend kind of checked

32:05

you on that. I

32:08

did it. I was like, I

32:10

mean, I'll respect it because you're

32:12

my boyfriend and I love you.

32:14

Yeah. But I'm

32:16

gonna keep doing me. No, but

32:18

I've noticed it because when I

32:20

hang out with you guys, I'll

32:23

say like crazy shit. And

32:25

I'm like, he doesn't make a peep. You

32:27

don't make a peep. And it's just like,

32:29

we just keep going about our date. That's

32:31

how my guy is. He doesn't laugh when

32:33

I say shit like that. He's

32:36

dead silent, you know? So,

32:38

do you think you're gonna follow my lead

32:40

and kind of tone it down or not?

32:42

No. Okay. I'm really

32:45

glad we have this talk. Okay,

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an addictive chemical. Alex

36:06

and I just took a quick

36:08

potty break. I don't flush

36:10

the toilet when I'm at home and

36:13

I, but not on purpose. I don't

36:15

know what it is. Do you do

36:17

that? No, but you

36:19

did tell me your toilet's black. It

36:22

is black. Is that like,

36:24

is that the new thing? I

36:26

mean, it's just like a really

36:28

modern bathroom. But yeah, the reason

36:30

why I was telling her that

36:32

it was black was because Actually,

36:36

I don't know if I really want

36:38

to go that. We don't mean to

36:40

get into that. Let's just say come

36:42

is white and the toilet is black.

36:45

Let's keep going. Okay,

36:47

so Alex, you told me that you

36:50

have something that you wanted to read

36:52

aloud. Okay, I did. Okay,

36:55

so you guys could assume that

36:57

Sophie and I get fucking crazy

36:59

DMs. I mean, Sophie especially, but

37:02

you know, I get some crazy ones that trickle here

37:04

and there. And this

37:06

probably takes the cake. Not

37:08

necessarily like the content, but

37:11

the length of it, okay?

37:13

Okay. Ready?

37:16

Yes. I mean, people are always in

37:18

the dance like, oh my God, send

37:20

nudes, send feet pics, send, you

37:23

know, whatever. Yeah.

37:25

Right. This guy? Ready?

37:29

Okay. Start

37:31

making and selling burping videos,

37:34

please. I would definitely

37:36

make myself your loyal customer using my

37:38

bank card to pay and buy burping

37:41

content videos from you. You

37:43

should make videos showing off your

37:45

burping on command skills. I'd

37:48

love to buy videos from you letting

37:50

out burps slash burping out loud. If

37:53

you record yourself letting out burps slash

37:55

burping out loud and sell the videos,

37:57

I'd be more than happy to pay

37:59

for them using my bank card. Have

38:02

you ever thought about doing it? Please

38:04

consider it. Take it into consideration and

38:06

it's extra financial income for you. Have

38:09

fun and don't be shy. XO. That's

38:12

so fucking long to say the same

38:14

thing over and over and over again.

38:16

Why is he calling it a bank

38:19

card? Like, you're

38:21

debit. You could just credit. Money.

38:24

Like, you mean you're about to pay

38:26

me from a fucking Visa gift card?

38:28

You got a Walmart for $100? Like,

38:30

what are you talking about? You definitely

38:32

don't need to say bank in front

38:34

of the word card. And anyone that...

38:37

to this is like, oh, I'm gonna

38:39

DM her too. Can we throw the

38:41

number? Just put the number up there.

38:43

Maybe I'd be more willing. a

38:45

good point. I think

38:48

there is such

38:50

a crazy amount

38:53

of guys in

38:55

the DMs asking

38:57

for you to

38:59

send them particular

39:01

things. Put

39:04

the dollar amount. Yeah. put

39:06

the dollar amount and also

39:09

there needs to be a

39:11

way that girls can respond

39:14

to these dudes and send

39:16

them what they so seek,

39:18

but feel safe in sending

39:21

it. I think that already

39:23

exists. I think it's called only fans. But I

39:25

don't think I think there's a lot of women

39:27

that they don't want to go and start an

39:29

only fans. Right. But how

39:31

many women are actually receiving? messages

39:34

creepy ass dudes. I want to

39:37

say for money. I

39:39

want to say a good chunk.

39:41

Really? I think so.

39:43

Yeah, but that are real. Well,

39:46

that's the other thing. That's

39:49

the other thing. You

39:51

know what? There should

39:54

just be a separate

39:56

place for DM's requesting

39:59

content. But the

40:01

only way that your submission can go

40:03

through is if you do pay a

40:05

premium. I know

40:07

you're serious. So you need to

40:09

pay five dollars to even ask

40:12

for something. OK, I

40:14

love that. And I'm pretty sure

40:16

that still is only fans, which

40:18

it's honestly starting to sound really,

40:21

really good. I'm like, I

40:23

literally just explain only fans. And I'm like, going

40:25

to start an app. I

40:28

feel like I've gone to the point where I'm

40:30

able to decipher the ones that are real and

40:33

that are fake, not like I fucking do anything

40:35

with the real ones. But so

40:37

I would love to know, like, what

40:39

are certain things that you can read

40:42

within the message that signal this dude's

40:44

for real? I mean,

40:46

I feel like even I

40:48

can kind of tell. I

40:51

feel like when they like are

40:53

specific are like showing like really

40:55

vulnerable like oh like if this

40:58

shit if you posted this show

41:00

on your story and like i

41:02

would get fired for my job

41:04

and oh a bunch of shit

41:06

and i feel like they're being

41:08

for real so basically if the

41:11

dude is being so

41:13

transparent and so real and what

41:15

he's asking for is pretty fucking

41:17

gnarly. It's like, oh, you fucking

41:19

do this shit. You're actually out

41:22

here paying these fucking strangers on

41:24

Instagram. Right, right, right.

41:26

Yeah. Because what would

41:28

be, I'm sure this happens,

41:31

but what would be the

41:33

point in a dude creating

41:35

a fake account to write

41:37

a girl some

41:39

crazy shit and ask her to

41:41

do some crazy shit that makes

41:44

him look crazy. Only

41:46

is it like a prank? Yeah,

41:49

exactly. It's like, why would

41:51

like, you know, yeah, why

41:53

would someone go to those

41:56

lengths? Yeah. So that's, I

41:58

think that's really smart. Like

42:00

the kind of the kinkier

42:02

the request. Yeah. Probably the

42:04

more real it is. I

42:06

also think the

42:08

more Info that they include right

42:11

right like if you put if

42:13

you DM me from your Actual

42:15

Instagram account I can click on

42:17

your bio. It takes me to

42:20

your fucking Facebook account. I can

42:22

look at your mutual friends I

42:24

can look at where you went

42:26

to high school who your mom

42:29

went to fucking college with XYZ.

42:31

It's like, okay Yeah, you're ready

42:33

to throw it all away for

42:35

this pussy. Is is is there

42:38

anything that is a dead giveaway

42:40

that someone's just like fucking around?

42:44

Like if they have like a

42:46

picture of a car is just

42:48

kidding. I mean that or and

42:50

correct me if I'm wrong. Not

42:53

that you would fucking even really know.

42:55

But like if a dude just writes

42:57

feet pics question mark, that

42:59

makes me think it's not. Well

43:02

a you're wasting my time cuz what

43:05

you're gonna go back and forth. Oh,

43:07

yeah, like how much were you thinking?

43:09

Like no, I don't have fucking time

43:12

for that Well, and also he didn't

43:14

even say like oh, I will pay

43:16

you right like you know how many

43:19

specifically snapchat I don't know if all

43:21

the men with the with the foot

43:23

fetish all had like They're all part

43:26

of this online Reddit group and they're

43:28

all like, okay guys, Snapchat

43:30

is where it's at. Half of my

43:32

requests on Snapchat are about my

43:34

feet. Really? Yes. You

43:37

think your Instagram DMs are crazy?

43:40

We need to look at your Snapchat.

43:42

Do you have Snapchat? no.

43:44

I have it just for like

43:46

you reasons. Like for work

43:49

shit. Right. But I did go

43:51

on it like. On the flight

43:53

for some reason I had like

43:55

four Snapchats from just guys and

43:57

they're just like like oh They

43:59

sent you pictures videos of them

44:02

just like chilling like in their

44:04

apartment It's like you are literally

44:06

34 years old like please don't

44:08

snapchammy a why the fuck do

44:10

you have snapchat B? I don't

44:12

know you See,

44:14

what the fuck are we doing?

44:16

Men are really still out here doing

44:19

that shit. Men should not take

44:21

selfies ever for any fucking reason. Ever.

44:23

I don't even think women are

44:25

doing that anymore. They're

44:27

not. We're doing candids, I think.

44:30

Yeah. So that's really

44:32

interesting and that's a crazy

44:34

fucking DM and I like

44:36

burping. Can you burp? I

44:38

love how you just read the craziest

44:40

DM and we got caught up on

44:43

the fact that he said he was

44:45

going to pay you with a bank

44:47

card. We didn't mention

44:49

one thing about him saying he wants

44:51

to burp before burping. Like, have I

44:53

ever burped on this podcast? Where did

44:55

he even conceive that idea? I don't

44:58

even think I burp. So maybe, maybe

45:00

that's why he's ready to, you know,

45:02

shell out the fucking big bucks. But

45:04

like, yeah, how much? Like, should I

45:07

respond? I don't fucking

45:09

respond. That was like a year ago. But,

45:11

like, how much is on that bank card,

45:13

you know I'm saying? Why can't you just

45:15

respond and say, sure, how much? I

45:18

just don't know how to burp. That

45:20

is some real shit. I'm

45:24

not even to try. If

45:26

me drank, like, five seltzers,

45:29

you could get people to catch

45:31

a burp. Yeah. I'm finna burp.

45:36

I don't burp either, though.

45:39

Sometimes I can't help it, obviously,

45:41

but I'm not really out here

45:44

doing it. I think it's like

45:46

an illness, but that's all good.

45:48

Let's keep it pushing. Okay. Oh

45:50

my god, people, this sleuth and

45:52

just people on the internet are

45:55

so fucking funny. Yeah,

45:57

like whatever we're saying, don't let

45:59

that deter you guys. Please, please,

46:01

please DM both of us. We

46:03

fucking... the shit out of it.

46:05

We do. Might be featured in

46:08

an app. Yes. I

46:10

want to talk about

46:12

friendship as an adult.

46:15

Okay. This is a topic that I

46:18

would argue neither of us know much

46:20

on. Or we would know, but

46:22

we're calling you my best friend and you're my

46:24

cousin. Yeah, see that's what I'm

46:27

saying. Not saying that we don't have

46:29

a great intel, but just saying we

46:31

don't really have the proof to the

46:33

pudding as in friends. I'm starting to

46:35

have a little proof to the pudding.

46:37

Okay. Let's talk about

46:39

it. So I think that I've

46:41

lived this firsthand and so now

46:44

I feel like I can talk

46:46

about it. It's something to offer.

46:48

Yeah, I mean a lot of

46:51

people write in. Like how is

46:53

it not one of them? I

46:55

kind of I'm actually surprised when

46:57

I'm going through the sloots questions.

47:01

How many of them are asking how

47:03

to make friends? Yeah, later in life.

47:05

Yeah, it makes me happy because it's

47:07

like, oh, they're just like me. I

47:10

know. Same. Right. Same. So

47:12

this really funny thing

47:14

happened when I started

47:17

dating someone who lives

47:19

in another country. It's

47:23

made me reevaluate

47:25

my life and

47:28

what I'm doing

47:30

here physically. Like,

47:33

okay, I live in the most amazing city in

47:35

the world. There's a chance

47:37

because Homeboy wants me to move in

47:40

with him in Europe. I

47:42

won't be living in New York. There's

47:45

a fat chance that I

47:47

have now a limited amount

47:49

of time in this apartment,

47:51

in this city, in

47:53

the United States. So what are we going to

47:55

do about it? Damn, this

47:57

is kind of heavy. So

48:00

this crazy thing has

48:02

happened where part of

48:04

me doesn't care as

48:07

much about certain things.

48:10

Part of me has now

48:12

been like You know, that

48:14

thing that you've always wanted

48:16

to do, now's the time

48:19

to fucking do it. So,

48:24

wow. I've always

48:26

talked about how

48:28

I don't nurture

48:31

my friendships. Which

48:33

is true. Which is very true. And

48:37

I've always been in a

48:39

relationship. And so when I wasn't

48:41

working, I was just hanging out with my

48:43

boyfriend. Well,

48:46

now my boyfriend lives

48:48

across the pond. Right.

48:51

So like you still are always in

48:53

a relationship, but there's just a little

48:55

bit of a distance factor. Let's not

48:57

let's not brush past that. She has

48:59

literally never been single for more than

49:01

24 hours. It's all good to

49:03

each their own. Keep it pushing. I mean, this

49:05

last time I was single for like six months.

49:09

OK. It's not my fault the guys

49:11

are fucking obsessed with me. It's also

49:13

true. So I have a boyfriend, but

49:15

I can't hang out with him. So

49:18

I got some free time. Right. Hey

49:27

ladies, I need you to stop

49:29

what you're doing and listen to

49:31

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49:34

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49:36

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49:50

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select items only. And

52:06

I decided that I

52:08

want to nurture my

52:10

friendships. Also, they've done

52:12

multiple studies and when

52:15

people are on their

52:17

deathbed, like old people,

52:19

old folks, on their deathbed and they

52:21

get asked, what are your biggest regrets?

52:24

What do you wish you could have done differently? One

52:27

of the top ones is I wish

52:29

I would have kept my friends or

52:31

like nurtured my friendships and shit. You

52:33

were just gonna let that fucking slide

52:35

and not tell me that? You know

52:37

I don't have anybody in my life.

52:39

Oh, but I mean... Damn. I'm like...

52:41

This is also out of a list

52:43

of... Actually, there were only like eight

52:45

of the most common regrets. That was

52:48

one of them. I feel like I

52:50

got the other seven down, but the

52:52

friend one. well, you don't

52:54

even... What do I always tell you though

52:56

when you talk about your friends? Oh,

52:58

that it's on me to do something about

53:00

it. I don't say it's on you, but

53:02

I do tell you, you know, people

53:06

are fucked up. People

53:09

won't align with your values

53:11

and stuff. Oh, yes.

53:13

if someone is toxic, they can't

53:15

be in your life. If

53:18

you have a friend that is, you

53:20

know, has maybe done you dirty or

53:22

wrong, but it's in a forgiving. It's

53:25

something you can forgive. It's

53:28

not like they fucked your.

53:30

boyfriend right then I kind

53:32

of think you know forgive

53:35

and forget yeah Sophia taught

53:37

me the other day that

53:39

not everyone you lose is

53:42

a loss and it's for

53:44

the better for the most

53:46

time okay yes I've sat

53:49

in my apartment and thought

53:51

to myself why do I

53:53

not have friends Why

53:55

am I not getting invited to do shit?

53:58

When I talked to the few

54:01

friends that I do have, they're

54:03

constantly hanging out with people and

54:05

hanging out with their girlfriends and

54:08

being invited to this wedding and

54:10

this wedding and this wedding and

54:12

they're the bridesmaid here and the

54:15

bridesmaid here and they're, you know,

54:17

running around with friends. And

54:20

I thought to myself, why

54:22

is it that I

54:25

don't have friends, really. Like I

54:27

can count on one hand my

54:29

friends. Right. And there's a lot

54:31

of reasons. I think one of

54:33

them being I've been burned really

54:36

fucking bad and I was very

54:38

scared. Damn, I forgot about that.

54:40

Yeah. I'm very scared to enter

54:42

into like any new friendship. Right.

54:46

I'm healed. I'm in

54:48

a completely different spot. I

54:51

started to go through my text

54:54

messages, Alex. The

54:56

amount of really amazing,

54:58

incredible, cool girls I

55:01

have met and exchanged

55:03

phone numbers with and

55:06

they've reached out and

55:08

been like, let's go

55:10

to this Pilates class.

55:13

Let's do this. And

55:16

I haven't responded was...

55:18

kind of alarming and

55:21

I did not feel

55:23

good about it and

55:25

it was just not

55:27

cool. I can only

55:29

imagine. So I decided,

55:32

and this has been like

55:34

a recent thing, I

55:36

decided, first of all,

55:38

holy shit, what do they call

55:41

it? Object impermanence? Permanence? Object

55:43

permanence. If something is not directly

55:45

in front of me, it doesn't

55:48

exist. Right. And I'm assuming you

55:50

have that. No. No. Okay,

55:52

I have it bad. Yeah, I could

55:54

see that. I really know you have

55:57

it bad. Yeah. So

55:59

I decided to go

56:01

through my phone and

56:03

fucking respond. Wow.

56:06

I don't remember getting a fucking text.

56:09

You know what, you're one of

56:12

the ones on my... Pinned? Yeah.

56:14

Actually, you are pinned. That's for

56:16

work purposes, so don't get excited.

56:19

I decided to respond

56:22

and the other thing

56:24

is you can't just

56:26

respond and call it

56:29

a day. Oh,

56:31

you got to keep responding. You

56:33

got to keep responding. And

56:36

not only that, you got to

56:38

follow through when y 'all make

56:40

plans. So you have me in

56:42

the first half, like that. Response,

56:45

I'm on it like blue bonnet.

56:48

The continuing. Then there's the back

56:50

and forth. Then there's

56:53

the making plans, looking

56:55

at your calendar, putting it in the

56:57

schedule. And then a week later,

56:59

when it comes down to go get brunch and you're

57:01

hungover as shit and you feel ugly and you don't

57:03

want to go anywhere, you still

57:05

go. Right. Because it's on

57:08

the calendar. Yeah,

57:10

it's kind of like, okay,

57:13

that's on me. So now

57:15

that I'm the most popular

57:17

girl in school and I

57:19

just have friends everywhere I

57:21

turn, everywhere I look, everywhere

57:24

I go, I'm starting to

57:26

pick up on things that

57:28

girls do to make friends

57:30

as an adult. Okay,

57:32

this could be a lesson. It can

57:35

be. And also when

57:37

the sloots ask me something and

57:39

I don't know the answer, I

57:42

start to try to look out for

57:44

it, you know, in my day -to

57:47

-day life so I can observe and

57:49

maybe come back with some knowledge. Do

57:52

girls just slide in on social media?

57:55

To make friends? Yeah,

57:58

they do. And I feel like I'd

58:00

be sliding in some DMs and not

58:03

getting a response. And that's fine. But

58:05

I think that's a parasocial relationship instead.

58:08

Oh, right. So like you were sliding

58:10

into someone with bad 10 million followers

58:12

and they didn't respond. That's

58:15

OK. Sliding in

58:17

to the DMs. We

58:19

talk about shoot your shot with dudes. Shoot

58:22

your shot with girls that you know

58:24

that you would like get along with

58:26

that post memes that you laugh out

58:28

loud to. Yeah. And.

58:30

Sliden. You can

58:33

slide into me, especially girls. I

58:35

need some friends. I'm

58:37

in Los Angeles. I'm

58:39

in New York. I'm in Utah. That's probably

58:42

it. But please, I literally don't have anyone

58:44

and I would love to hang out. And

58:46

Alex is amazing to hang out with. Also,

58:48

I've had quite a few girls reach out

58:51

to me who live in Utah. We're like,

58:53

oh my God, we should meet up when

58:55

you're there. I'm barely ever there. But Alex

58:58

is there. And there

59:00

you have it. Another

59:02

one is You're going to

59:04

make friends by hanging out

59:06

with your friends, friends. Do

59:09

you know I'm saying? Right. So

59:11

for example, I

59:14

met this girl a

59:16

year ago and we

59:18

lost touch. I

59:20

remember she was like so cute, so funny,

59:22

amazing. I

59:24

decided I went to

59:27

a mutual friend of

59:29

ours event. and

59:31

ran into her, and

59:34

it rekindled this whole thing, and then

59:36

we went to dinner the following day.

59:39

And so it's like, putting yourself

59:41

out there, you know,

59:44

and you're going to something where it's like a group

59:46

of girls, there's gonna be, it's more than just like

59:48

a one -on -one, you're

59:51

going, that's like, that's how you meet people.

59:54

is literally all you gotta do

59:56

is leave your apartment. Yeah, get

59:58

out there. Just leave your fucking

1:00:01

apartment and I'm telling you the

1:00:03

world will unfold. Yeah. That and

1:00:05

also one more thing I want

1:00:07

to add is like what are

1:00:10

your special interests? You know like

1:00:12

for example me, skiing,

1:00:15

weed. I

1:00:17

don't know, eating vegan food. Yeah.

1:00:19

So when I was in LA,

1:00:22

I went to a lot of

1:00:24

weed events. Love that. And I

1:00:27

met so many people. Right, right.

1:00:29

And girls that I have developed

1:00:31

relationships with, maybe it's for content

1:00:34

or, you know, events. But,

1:00:36

you know, I met some people that,

1:00:39

like, I can relate to, actually. Well,

1:00:41

yeah. And that I want to spend

1:00:43

time with. Right. Because you guys... I

1:00:45

have this common bond. You

1:00:47

guys have a commonality. So it's like,

1:00:49

let's fucking run it. Yeah. So just

1:00:52

lay out your special interests. If it's

1:00:54

yoga, hiking. 100%.

1:00:57

I don't even fucking know

1:00:59

what other hobbies there are.

1:01:01

You're looking at me like I'm going

1:01:04

to offer up with my hobbies now.

1:01:06

know. There's nothing. So yeah, you can

1:01:08

always find people that way. I think

1:01:10

that you already have something in common.

1:01:13

So boom friendship. There you go. I

1:01:16

think there's this weird

1:01:18

stigma and girls because

1:01:20

it's not a natural

1:01:22

thing, I guess. I

1:01:25

don't know why like going on

1:01:27

dating apps and shit is so

1:01:29

normalized. Mm -hmm. But I was

1:01:32

watching a documentary and these two

1:01:34

girls were on it who were

1:01:36

best friends and they met because

1:01:39

They were on Bumble or Hinge,

1:01:41

one of those, and said that they

1:01:43

were there looking for friends. Yeah,

1:01:45

there's Bumble BFF. I did

1:01:47

that once. You did? Yes. And?

1:01:50

And I'm pretty sure like I met this

1:01:52

really fun, amazing girl. OK, so I should

1:01:54

be on that. 100%. I

1:01:56

know it like it can feel weird,

1:01:59

but I think you it. Yeah, I'm

1:02:01

sure my boyfriend's going to love seeing

1:02:03

Bumble redownload it. Re, download

1:02:06

it for the first time. Yeah,

1:02:08

I think those are all really good ways.

1:02:11

And for those of you who are

1:02:13

exactly like me, and it does not

1:02:15

come naturally to in person go up

1:02:17

to someone and be like, I think

1:02:20

you're really cute and really funny. Like,

1:02:22

let me get your numbers so we

1:02:24

can hang out. I'm not that kind

1:02:27

of bitch. I wish I was. I

1:02:29

wish I was super friendly like that

1:02:31

and I would put myself out there.

1:02:34

I'm not. So.

1:02:37

I think a lot of people feel that

1:02:39

way. And you can

1:02:41

still make friends without doing that.

1:02:43

Right. You could do it online,

1:02:47

socials, whatever

1:02:49

groups are online, you know?

1:02:52

Discourse. Discourse. Discourse. But

1:02:54

honestly, all the ways that I

1:02:57

just mentioned. Yeah. Alex, friendship

1:03:00

is out there. Friendship is out

1:03:02

there. Covered some ground. Yeah,

1:03:05

we have. And I'm

1:03:07

now sweating a lot.

1:03:10

I'm about to pee my pants. And

1:03:12

I need to go pee again, and

1:03:15

you're leaving for a flight in four

1:03:17

minutes. Ugh, so sad. But

1:03:19

you know what? We had a

1:03:21

great time, and I love you,

1:03:23

and sleuths, I love you guys.

1:03:25

Alex, let him know.

1:03:28

Where the fuck you be at?

1:03:30

Where you finna be at? I'm

1:03:32

finna be on Twitch and Instagram

1:03:34

at alexfranko underscore meow. Let's

1:03:36

hang out on Twitch and Sophia,

1:03:38

where can they find you? Sophia

1:03:40

and I, Franco and the Y

1:03:42

also on YouTube. Please subscribe

1:03:44

to the YouTube channel. Where

1:03:47

do they write in their questions, Alex? Please

1:03:49

write in. Please write in. Please write in. We

1:03:51

want to hear from you. I don't care if

1:03:53

like, hey, I had a piece of toast for

1:03:55

breakfast or I brushed my teeth once instead

1:03:57

of twice today, write the

1:03:59

fuck in. You You can

1:04:01

write in. It's gonna

1:04:03

be in the description of

1:04:05

this episode. It's gonna

1:04:07

be in Sophia's bio. Yep.

1:04:10

Write in. Write in, guys. We wanna hear

1:04:12

from you. Love you, sluts. I'll talk

1:04:14

to you next week. Bye -bye. Just

1:04:34

doing a quick check -in to let

1:04:36

you guys know that I am

1:04:38

not going anywhere this holiday season

1:04:40

and you can expect new episodes every

1:04:42

single week. Just make sure

1:04:44

to follow so you don't miss

1:04:46

an episode.