Brits

Brits

Released Monday, 13th February 2023
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Brits

Brits

Brits

Brits

Monday, 13th February 2023
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

This is Steve Allen's a little bit extra,

0:03

leading Britain's conversation. You're listening

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1:00

the whole show podcast. Thank

1:03

you. Morning, everybody. Welcome along

1:05

to your free podcast for today, Monday,

1:08

February the thirteenth. Thank goodness it isn't

1:10

Friday. The thirteenth. That

1:12

would be an absolute disaster. But

1:14

we've had the British awards. I quite like

1:16

the review in the Telegraph,

1:18

which basically pulled it apart. And

1:21

sort of said, I mean, you know, lots things didn't

1:23

go as they were supposed to. The worst presentation

1:27

some years ago was Samantha Fox

1:29

and Mick Fleetwood. They didn't have

1:31

the faintest idea of what was going on.

1:33

They queued a bit that never happened. And

1:35

this one, they said Mount Ogiligan who

1:37

think was hosting needs to get a

1:39

new script writer or find something that's

1:41

sort of, you know, something in in sort of keeping.

1:44

It doesn't get a big audience. Mainly

1:46

because it's it's lost its edge. Years

1:49

ago, I can remember Michael Jackson comes on

1:51

to do Earth song, and Jarvis Cocker

1:53

invades the set you know,

1:55

John Prescott was there. Somebody emptied the bucket

1:57

of ice over his head. You know, hey,

2:00

geez stuff. Not the sort of the pampering

2:02

that you get on at the moment. I mean, the nearest thing that

2:04

you actually get is Harry Styles gets

2:07

another award and another

2:09

award and then he got another award

2:11

and then he got another award because so

2:13

he gets four. He gets four awards.

2:15

So, you know, he is man of the

2:18

moment. Sam Smith looked like a

2:20

prat I mean, you know, I'm

2:22

sure very lovely dude to weigh it, but it is

2:24

Your insecurities are coming through on this one.

2:26

I'm afraid. I don't know what it was.

2:28

It's like an inflatable bodysuit with

2:30

bulbous arms and legs, which we think have been

2:32

warned before, we think David Bowie had done it.

2:35

So not even current, not even

2:37

not even original, I'm afraid. But, you know,

2:39

if that's what he wants to wear it, must how you

2:41

go to the toilet. I've got no idea. One

2:44

can only hazard a guess, can't we? About,

2:47

you know, whether you have to take the whole thing off

2:49

and all the rest of it. Then we were told that Sam

2:51

Smith was in a chaotic backstage

2:53

argument after their five

2:56

hundred thousand pound Brit set

2:58

malfunctioned, and

3:00

he he's he's non binary. I really couldn't

3:02

give a toss. I know it makes me sound really awful.

3:05

But I'm sorry. I'm not I'm really not interested.

3:07

I really don't care. I really

3:09

don't care. He's non binary. Whatever. God's

3:11

name that means. I have no idea. And

3:14

he uses gender neutral pronouns. But

3:16

anyway, the set mouth, either way, the set screwed

3:18

up. And that doesn't make any difference whether

3:20

he's non binary gender

3:22

neutral. I couldn't care less. I couldn't

3:24

care less. But anyway,

3:27

they did actually sort of still come up

3:29

they did make a quick exit avoiding any

3:31

of the shows after parties because

3:34

you can tell the ones who have nothing to do with it.

3:36

Like, I think Maya JAMA All

3:38

she got to do with the brits. She hosts a

3:40

a little a little love island program for

3:42

desperately unhappy people who can't find anybody

3:44

to go out with. And that's her claim to fame. My

3:46

god's name was she doing there. No idea.

3:49

Mind you? I did read

3:51

the the stories. About Vanessa

3:53

Phelps's ex fiancee, Benafodu. He's

3:56

homeless. Good. Good.

3:59

I'm delighted. Have you saved any money,

4:01

sweet pea? Shinct not too apparently.

4:03

This has been going on for ages. This isn't new.

4:06

I was reading a a thing, which

4:08

I think Vanessa had done. And

4:11

this has been going on for what

4:13

basically, I thought it said years. Years.

4:17

So why she's put up with it? I've got no idea

4:19

because he's just a dirty little cheat.

4:22

I'm glad she's kicked him out. It's her house.

4:25

Her house, he doesn't contribute anything as far

4:27

as I know. And I believe,

4:29

actually, this this mansion was previously

4:31

owned by Charles Archie. But she's been

4:34

in it for ages, ages and ages

4:36

and ages. But the the thing

4:38

to do now is he he's done I mean,

4:40

I'm so bored with him. He's as as dull as anything,

4:42

really. And he picked somebody up

4:44

at a holiday camp and

4:46

then somebody was sort of texting him backwards

4:48

and forwards. I mean, basically, a

4:50

pratter the first order. You know, if you're

4:53

with somebody, it doesn't matter whether you're married or

4:55

whatever, and you cheat, not just

4:57

once, but a few times, out,

4:59

you go failure. You

5:02

know, all the all the advice has come from

5:04

all the agony uncles and aunts

5:06

saying, get rid of him. You know,

5:08

you cannot trust this man as far as

5:11

you could throw him. He's a liar. He's

5:13

a cheat. And

5:15

and that's You have to get rid of him. I have to

5:17

get rid of him. So I'm not really

5:19

bothered about how long the relationship was going

5:21

on for, you know, whatever happened or anything else.

5:23

All you know is he cheated. And

5:25

if somebody cheats on you,

5:27

you kick them out as quick as possible. There's no such

5:30

thing as oh, giving them a second chance.

5:33

I'm sorry. He's he's had all the chances.

5:35

He's used up all his nine lives. They've

5:37

all gone and and

5:39

he's he's homeless. Well, obviously, he

5:41

hasn't saved any money up. You know,

5:43

I'd have thought he'd have been quite a clever intelligent

5:46

person and maybe, you know, money he might

5:48

have earned through doing gigs in holiday

5:50

camps. Put it to buying

5:52

a little flat, which could be his bolt hole or something

5:54

like that. But so he's homeless.

5:56

Good. I couldn't be more delighted.

5:59

That'll teach you. That'll teach you. Vanessa

6:01

knows what all her friends will be saying the same thing,

6:03

kick him out. So she's kicked him out

6:06

well done.

6:08

We don't need to prove to anyone that we're real, go

6:10

over we go, love islands, ekins, Sue, and

6:12

Davi Day, all of his name is, I don't know,

6:14

another two non entities. They

6:17

won the ITV dating show, but

6:20

there are rumors that the relationship is fake.

6:22

Because if you don't get a relationship in Love Island,

6:24

you really are a has been. I mean, it's

6:26

not difficult, but they're all desperate to be picked up.

6:29

Seriously, it's it's it's a bit like, you

6:32

know, watching naked attraction. You

6:35

know, where they sort of go, oh, I don't know. What sort of

6:37

person are you looking for? I don't know. You

6:39

think, well, you put yourself up on a program

6:42

where you're gonna see lots of willies or the other bits.

6:44

And they and they they sort of go, oh,

6:46

I've never seen so many, you think. I bet you

6:48

bloody ass. They all

6:50

look like they've been there and round the block a few

6:52

times, I'm afraid. Which

6:55

is a which is a bit of a shame, but they sort of

6:57

try and make out that it's something interesting. It's just

6:59

basically people who wanna go on television

7:01

and take all the clothes off. That's all it is.

7:03

It's nothing more than that. You don't have to be intelligent

7:06

to do it. If you're well hung, of course,

7:08

it kind of works in your favor. But if you're

7:10

mister teeny tiny, which most of them appear

7:12

to be, I wouldn't bother. Seriously,

7:15

you know, I found the whole thing very sort of embarrassing.

7:17

And then they go for close ups. So people went,

7:19

some of them appeared, and some of them, oh,

7:21

gold in heaven. Listen, if you can't find

7:23

anybody in this big bad world out there, you

7:25

might as well just give up now. You have

7:27

to go on television and take all your clothes off.

7:29

There was woman the other day. She was an old woman.

7:32

And I remember thinking, oh, she'd been married and

7:34

then the marriage had split her. I'm thinking, you're not

7:36

seriously gonna take away your clothes off on television.

7:39

Are you? I mean, please. Please. And

7:41

then she discovered she liked taking her clothes

7:43

off. You know, not only just on television,

7:45

she did it at home, and mowing the lawn,

7:47

doing all these other bits and pieces, and I thought, Oh,

7:50

lord above really is dreadful. Oh,

7:52

by the way, just going back to the British Awards,

7:55

pulled in three point nine million viewers.

7:58

So from the last time around, it's added

8:00

added a few on, which is okay.

8:03

I mean, I think it it rose by one

8:05

point two million. But they

8:07

need to up the ante. They need to up the

8:09

ante. And as far as unconcerned, all the people who

8:11

go there enjoy it, but it's

8:14

a case of, you know, they need to

8:16

need to sort of push it up a bit. I mean, three point

8:18

nine million is not a great audience. It's

8:20

not really. It's not very good. IDris

8:23

Elber clarifies why he no longer calls

8:25

himself a black actor. Being an actor

8:27

as a profession he said is like being an architect. They're

8:29

not defined by race. Who calls him

8:31

a black actor? I mean,

8:34

they did thing on the television the other day and

8:36

it had, you know, all those talking

8:38

heads. Don, Jolly, Yorn,

8:40

you know, all these sort of people commenting on

8:42

different little bits and pieces. And

8:45

I was sort of I was sort of watching it and

8:47

that they had sort of various people

8:49

on there. And then Roseanne Barr, who

8:51

made the biggest cock up of her entire career.

8:53

In fact, it was so bad but

8:56

the company that made her program, Roseanne,

8:59

canceled it immediately. She was dropped.

9:01

Her entire career collapsed. Because

9:04

she came out with this racist slur. And

9:06

then she proceeded to not do herself

9:08

any favors. When she was being interviewed, she was quite

9:10

clearly drunk. And she kept saying, I

9:12

thought she was white and all this

9:14

kind of thought, oh, it was dreadful, dreadful.

9:18

Liu swim in the star, Cyrid Khan,

9:20

she has been on loose women for ages and ages.

9:23

I mean, to be honest with you, she

9:25

was on there. She didn't contribute to the program.

9:28

But she's now joined Eamon Holmes on

9:30

GB News. God in heaven.

9:32

And so she's going to help him

9:34

out every Monday and Tuesday. So

9:38

he said he he he was sort of

9:40

announced his excitement by being joined by one

9:42

of his best friends. I thought she was ghastly.

9:45

Absolutely, ghastly. And

9:47

she's gonna be enticed over to the

9:49

right leaning channel. And

9:52

he says your Monday Tuesday lineup on

9:54

the breakfast show gets no audience at all.

9:57

So she basically was still trying to

9:59

find out who she fell out with the loose women.

10:01

Because that's what it was. She fell out with people and then

10:03

she did a drama queen tantrum and

10:06

off she todled and never to be heard since

10:08

bit of a shame. Kate Winslet says filming

10:10

sex scenes with Leonardo De Capri in front of

10:12

her husband was weird. We don't

10:15

actually have sex do it. It's just it's called

10:17

acting. I mean, as I don't really

10:19

understand. Oh, look. Joe

10:21

Swash, obviously, he's run out of the spray hair

10:23

because he's wearing his baseball cap again

10:26

at Stacey Solomon. Gives

10:28

birth to child

10:30

number five. Hope the work keeps coming

10:32

in there and you keep earning money otherwise very

10:34

difficult for you. And perhaps she can get

10:36

Joe another job or something like that. Perhaps she

10:38

could have a hair transplant. They all do

10:41

it. Lee Meeds had one. Lee Meeds had

10:43

one. Shaniya Twain recalls a very

10:45

low period in her life and fear she'd never sing again,

10:47

that don't impress the me much she

10:49

loves Harry Styles. Absolutely.

10:53

She absolutely loves him. She said he's

10:55

great. She said he's so nice and he's genuine. Oh,

10:57

Katie Price. Hints

10:59

at reviving a music career. It should show him really

11:01

love if you could sing, but you can't sing. Tone

11:04

deaf. Tone deaf. And

11:07

she's got new music on the way. And

11:09

this is with x factor scarlett Lee,

11:11

whoever that is. And she said this is gonna

11:14

be beautiful. I'm loving it. And

11:16

it's great. And the pair said they're working

11:18

on a Christmas single. Well,

11:21

for this year or last year, dear. Which one did you?

11:23

Everything you touch is a failure. Your

11:25

hair looks a wreck. Your cosmetic surgery

11:28

doesn't work. You can't write. You've never

11:30

written a book in your life. Your modeling career

11:32

has given up on you. You're a bankrupt. You're

11:34

a drunk. I've forgotten

11:36

anything. Oh, yeah. You're living in a mucky mansion.

11:39

But anyway, bankruptcy hearing, twelve thousand

11:41

a month, she said she'd pay. Nothing at all. So

11:43

there's no career comeback love. No.

11:45

I mean, who's gonna I mean, on what show do you think you're

11:48

gonna be appearing? There aren't any

11:50

shows for people like you. They

11:52

say the X glamour model. I

11:54

mean, really? Oli Meurs

11:56

has transformed his his his

11:58

body. So he he's gone from

12:00

being mister mister Flabbie,

12:03

and now he's dating a body builder. And

12:06

and so he's he's

12:09

sort of developed up. They all do it though. Don't know.

12:11

They all do it. So they have a picture of them in their

12:13

pants. So you can see what he looks like when

12:15

he's he's sort of worked out, which is, you know, which is

12:17

lovely. He's thirty eight now,

12:19

which is probably the time that you need to do things like

12:21

that. Anybody

12:24

familiar with somebody called Tasha Gorrie?

12:28

No. Not a clue. Not a clue, anyway.

12:31

Here she is. She's apparently a

12:33

model and a dancer from North Yorkshire.

12:35

Ravi. Sorry, written. I was gonna say rubbish,

12:38

actually. But she loves her new finger. A

12:41

new finger. And also the other one,

12:43

which I thought must have been getting a bit desperate.

12:45

Do you remember she was in Brookside?

12:48

Was it Sarah Jane Dunn or something like that?

12:50

And she then decided, one can be glamour

12:52

model. So she goes on to the for

12:54

fans only sides whatever it is and starts

12:56

vlogging pictures. And say, we go, okay. Fair

12:58

enough. Do you do whatever you wanna do? Nobody cares.

13:01

But obviously, it must have started tailing

13:03

off because there was a two page

13:05

interview with her talking about you know, she's

13:07

empowering. She's not empowering anybody at all.

13:09

She's done it for the money. She was empowering women.

13:11

She'd do it for free. But she's

13:13

still going on about, oh, you know, people were saying

13:15

this about me. Nobody gives us stuff to do. What

13:18

you do? You wanna get your tits out? Get your

13:20

tits out. We don't care. I'm not gonna lose

13:22

any sleep over at Emma Freight.

13:25

Netflix. No. Scapaldi signed

13:27

a seven figure deal with Netflix. I think he

13:29

could play Meat Loaf. Don't you think he bears striking

13:32

resemblance to meet Loaf a little bit actually.

13:34

And the masked singer,

13:37

fans, were stunned last night because

13:39

Ritchie's samboro was unveiled as jacket

13:41

potato. Yeah. I should imagine they were stunned

13:43

because they hadn't have fainted his idea who he was.

13:46

They went, oh, it's who? Ritchie

13:49

Sambora. Who's he? He's

13:51

an American rock guitarist. Why would you know

13:54

who he is? The sort of people who watch the masked singer.

13:56

They they might know Sinner Easton, but they

13:58

certainly wouldn't know Ritchie

14:00

Sambora. He must need the money. And

14:02

Eddie Gold ain't defends Tom Grennan,

14:05

following his inappropriate comment about her

14:07

breasts and live on stage at the Brits.

14:09

I love it. It just gets better and better, better

14:12

and better. And she

14:14

declared that no harm was intended

14:17

after there was a backlash from fans following

14:19

Tom's awkward joke. And

14:21

I think he says, I love what you're doing. They're your

14:23

real boobs. And all that kind of stuff. It's,

14:25

you know, listen. It is

14:28

what it is. It's got nothing to do with the

14:30

so called fans. Why don't you mind your own business?

14:32

Keep your beaky nose out. If she wasn't offended

14:34

by all the hells it's got to do with you, mind

14:37

your own business, go and find a job,

14:39

do something like that. You know,

14:42

there's so so called fans of the

14:44

Brit award. I mean, I don't know if they perhaps they get them from

14:46

an agency or something. I don't know. I can never work

14:48

it all out. But it's all very interesting. Anyway,

14:50

here we go another week. Actually, I think the weather's

14:52

improved a little bit. I think it only

14:54

a little bit. Not not hugely. It's

14:56

got a bit milder. Which is quite nice.

14:58

Today, I'm off to the doctors. Unfortunately,

15:01

it's taking an arm full of blood again.

15:03

So I've got that to look forward to. Which, unfortunately,

15:05

because we've also got somebody coming around

15:08

to give us a quote for a for a new window.

15:10

But luckily, my my Lin said,

15:13

don't worry. Typical, isn't it?

15:15

My my my blood appointment is eleven thirty,

15:17

and the the man's coming around

15:19

at eleven. I mean, I'm I said to Linus,

15:21

I said, oh, he turns up early because then I can be there

15:23

for it. And and

15:25

then I can nip around and and

15:28

go and get my blood done. It doesn't take too long

15:30

to get your blood's done. It's just finding the vein.

15:33

It's a bit cringe even thinking about it. Anyway,

15:35

listen, have a fantastic day. Have

15:37

fantastic day. Did you hear earlier on? I was

15:40

at the my friend, Tony Paladri. Who

15:42

owns little Italy in Frit Street, which

15:45

is literally I mean, I'm trying to work out actually

15:47

how close they are to the list of square theater. think

15:49

they're really close to the Leicester Square Theatre.

15:51

They're very close. But he said, if you're going

15:53

in there for summer to eat before the show, you

15:55

get free glass of Brisecco. Free

15:59

glass of per se. And then he said to me you can come along

16:01

after us. I'll be I'll be shooting off him to go

16:03

to bed. I've got I've got to be back

16:05

in the morning. In the early hours,

16:07

which I'm sure, will be absolutely lovely.

16:09

Absolutely fantastic. But they're good good for

16:12

for little Italy. Tony be there

16:14

all day. He likes it because he's a big LBC family.

16:16

He just loves it. He can't get enough of it. Anyway,

16:18

have a have a lovely lovely day. Join

16:21

me tomorrow. Please, I wonder what

16:23

what startling revelations will have tomorrow.

16:25

Gold and low nose, and I'm sure it'll

16:27

be wonderful. In the meantime, Keep downloading,

16:30

keep podcasting, and I'll talk to you tomorrow till

16:32

then. Stay safe. Leading

16:35

Britain's conversation, LBC.

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