0:02

This is LVC from

0:04

Global, leading Britain's conversation

0:07

with Steve Allen. Following

0:14

a pretty nice heavy company, three minutes past

0:16

four bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy see. Here we

0:18

go again. It's Tuesday, November the fifteenth.

0:21

I'm Steve Allen. No more apologies, and I'm with

0:23

you until seven o'clock this morning. It's all going

0:25

on. It's all going on. Another fashion

0:28

retailer, this one called jewels, I've

0:30

never heard of it, whether it's a northern one or something.

0:32

I don't know. They're going into administration just

0:35

before Christmas, sixteen hundred jobs.

0:37

This seems to be the norm now. And the worst thing is

0:39

that if you read these statistics out

0:41

on air. It it's just a

0:44

number. It doesn't mean anything. You

0:46

tend to forget about the misery

0:48

that this can cause families.

0:50

And remember years and

0:52

years ago, you'd read about an airplane coming

0:54

down in a particular country and they go

0:56

with the loss of two hundred and thirty five lives. And

0:59

you didn't think If

1:00

you're a news reader, you can't get involved in

1:03

a story that's on the news. And so consequently,

1:05

people just come up with a number.

1:07

You don't think about the families that are gonna

1:09

be impacted by that. You don't think, you

1:11

know, you read about it. And because you're so used

1:13

to reading about it, your mind becomes

1:15

very blurred when it comes to

1:17

talking about, you know, what

1:19

goes on and the people who've lost their lives

1:21

and people who've lost their jobs. Even during the pandemic,

1:24

loads of people were losing their jobs. And we just

1:26

did which were people losing their jobs. And I used

1:29

to think that this is having a huge impact on

1:31

the community. you know, people say,

1:33

what happens to be puts the tax up? Would you lucky

1:35

to be in a position where they can put the tax

1:37

up? I mean, don't have any any problem

1:39

with anything like that. because I don't

1:41

have to pay national insurance. So I I work

1:43

on the assumption. I win on one and lose on the

1:45

other. But that's what happens nowadays.

1:48

You know, the more money you earn, the

1:50

more liable you are to be included in

1:52

the sort of the the top tax people in

1:54

the country. So I'm gonna be fifty fifty

1:57

two, fifty five pence in the pound. I don't know.

1:59

I've no idea. It's just I just found

2:01

it very depressing that,

2:04

you know, but then people are in a much worse position

2:06

than I am. Another

2:08

one here. Oh, I got oh, I got my

2:10

my my mug sent to me. I'll tell you about

2:12

that a little bit later on. Johnny

2:15

Owen, mentioned earlier, he's apologized

2:17

to his wife after the cancer diagnosis. He's

2:19

being very I always thought at you if anybody

2:21

would deal With something like being told

2:24

you've got a terminal illness, he would be the

2:26

one who would be able to cope with it. He's

2:28

very grounded, feet on the ground,

2:30

family business. I think they've got, they do

2:32

houses, and I'm sure they do stuff like that.

2:35

And he's been given, well, he doesn't know

2:37

how long. It could be three months. It

2:39

could be six months. could be a year,

2:41

we don't know, but he's gonna make the most

2:43

of it. So as I said yesterday, we wish him the very

2:45

best. Luckily, it's made all the papers today.

2:48

I think mainly because people suddenly realizing,

2:50

oh, it's not Johnny Owen. That Johnny

2:52

Owen. So people have finally put it in the paper,

2:55

so at least he's sharing the experience.

2:58

which is something I'll never thought

3:00

I'd be saying There's also a dispute,

3:02

a neighborly dispute. It's a woman who fills

3:04

up her drive with

3:06

pop plants. not

3:08

just one or two hundreds

3:09

hundreds. She's quite

3:11

clearly mad as a fruit cake. It's gone to court,

3:14

she's lost, and she's got to pay

3:16

thirty thousand pounds.

3:18

Thirty thousand pounds. Because if you

3:20

have neighborly disputes, it

3:22

really is that Biden? Why does he look

3:24

like a Thunderbird's puppet? Has he had

3:26

surgery? Have you ever seen anything like it?

3:29

Does he look like it? He doesn't look doesn't know where he

3:31

is. So where am I going here? He he doesn't

3:33

he's no idea. I see. he is a little bit.

3:35

Pink, keep long. Pink, keep long. A bit like that. There's

3:37

no really poor self. Sorry to move away from that.

3:39

But if you have a dispute

3:41

with neighbors, The chances are it

3:43

can escalate beyond anything you've ever

3:45

had before in your life. It can be over Lelandai.

3:49

Shared ownership of a drive. People

3:51

trying to get to a garage. all

3:53

of these sort of things can affect the

3:55

relationship you have until eventually you

3:57

hate the people next door.

3:59

You cannot stand them. And this particular

4:01

woman, her entire drive is covered by all these

4:03

pop plants. Now,

4:05

don't get me wrong. I'm the big fan of pop plants.

4:07

I like pop plants. not filling up

4:09

the whole drive. So she's got a car, but

4:11

she parks it outside. So the neighbors have to go

4:13

round her to get onto their drive.

4:16

And what she does is she pays the tax on

4:18

it. and she's insured. She just

4:20

goes and puts food in it and then

4:22

she'll drive it a little way and then she'll put it back where

4:24

it was. So it's just deliberately

4:26

done be difficult for the neighbor. You can imagine

4:28

they've been exposed to somebody like that. And

4:30

it's gone on for apparently years

4:32

and years. The

4:34

labor leaders have called for Amazon and

4:36

Google to pay more tax, well, any tax would be

4:38

nice. Please, you know, if they

4:40

I don't understand how all these companies

4:43

like Shell and BP can make these huge

4:45

profits And yet the amount of

4:47

piddling tax that we seem to get back is ridiculous.

4:49

It's the reinvestment, isn't it? That's why the

4:51

coffee shops worked out. I

4:53

remember them trying to explain that they they've

4:56

taken the profit from one shop and they've reinvested

4:58

it. I said they don't have to pay tax

5:00

on it because they've reinvest I wish I could do that.

5:02

which I could do it. Oh, by the way, if you're waking

5:04

up this morning, you've looked out the window, foggy.

5:07

Very foggy and misty. It's

5:09

very much a wintry kind

5:12

of weather. It's a bit spooky

5:14

out there. The other day, when I got off the train

5:16

at Twickenham, it

5:18

was it was really noticeable. You couldn't

5:20

really see every car that was coming along.

5:23

And I remember looking at it thinking, cool. It's

5:25

like harking back to these days. It's a

5:27

sudden dropping of temperature. and it

5:29

has dropped today. So just make sure,

5:32

be careful if you're out on the road. There is still a

5:34

bit of fog around and apparently

5:36

later on

5:37

rain. Typical

5:38

in it, rain. I've just put all the cushions

5:41

out on the patio to dry off,

5:43

and now they're going to be very wet

5:45

because I've got the early morning due and

5:48

now they're gonna be having sort of rain as

5:50

well. Doesn't matter. I change them every

5:52

softness. They're so cheap. Cushion's just to put

5:54

on the chairs.

5:55

Just so it's nice and comfy on your bum,

5:57

which is good. Peter crouch has teamed up with

5:59

an

5:59

orchestra. He wants a Christmas number one. Him

6:02

and Paul Poats. How many more

6:04

people are going for the number one? Sooty

6:06

is going to the number one. Matt Goss.

6:09

No chance. Matt Goss. is going for

6:11

the Christmas number one. If he doesn't get it, he's

6:13

gonna be in a foul mood. He really is

6:15

gonna be so cross. So now Peter

6:17

Peter crouch and Paul Poats.

6:20

I think that's quite a nice

6:22

pairing actually. I really do.

6:24

The JD, weather spoons, pubs are running out of

6:26

eggs, so breakfast, not the set will go somewhere

6:28

else. Well, they have got eggs. I was in a

6:30

shop the other day, loads of eggs. I didn't notice any

6:32

shortage of eggs at all. It's just put

6:34

out to make you go, to make you go by some eggs.

6:37

I had pigs

6:39

and blankets yesterday. I put pigs

6:41

and blankets in a saucepan to

6:43

steam them because I found it better

6:45

than deep frying or anything like that. or

6:47

shallow frying. And then once

6:49

they cooked through, I then put

6:53

some cauliflower cheese

6:56

over the top of it. And I've got

6:58

two portions over the top of it and let that soak

7:00

through and cook, so was delicious. Absolutely

7:02

delicious. And I felt really awful at the end of

7:04

it, but I've there. Sold it. Who

7:06

cares? How to reduce

7:08

your property's value? Take out

7:10

the bathroom or put in a home cinema Nobody

7:12

wants home cinemas now, just buy a bigger

7:14

television. And also, don't

7:16

take out the bath. Apparently,

7:18

a lot of houses have got a

7:20

bathroom and then they've got en suite

7:23

shower rooms in the bedroom, although

7:25

I prefer a shower. I really

7:27

like a shower. and they said a lot of

7:29

people take out the bathrooms and put in cinema

7:31

rooms. I don't know why. Let's go to the cinema.

7:33

What do I put in a cinema room for?

7:35

It's like, you know, as Pete will tell you the pool then,

7:38

You can have you can have

7:40

something like a pool put

7:42

in, but you won't use it that often.

7:45

You'll use it you know, a number of

7:47

times. And then the novelty will wear off. It's like

7:49

going holiday. There's a limit how many times you get

7:51

excited about making a sandcastle. Yeah.

7:54

Private cinema. Oh, yeah.

7:56

No. Friedrich's got one. And

7:58

it's very nice. I've seen some lovely ones in

8:00

modern houses with big arm chairs,

8:02

and the curtains which part and then the

8:04

script, it's just, yeah, big. And it

8:06

looks it looks nice. It does look

8:08

quite nice. But there again, I'd be a bit

8:10

frightened because you're sitting in a darkened room and I don't

8:12

like sitting in darkened rooms. So, you know, if gonna

8:14

have a television, it's gonna be in the sitting room where

8:16

I can actually see what's going on around

8:18

me. I don't like it any

8:20

other way. Also, doubt has been

8:22

throw thrown on the royal role of the dukes

8:24

Harry and Andrew. Apparently

8:26

Prince Charles has no place for them. It's amazing,

8:28

isn't it really? But the royal family can be very

8:30

harsh about this. Very harsh. They

8:33

don't didn't make any bones about it. We

8:35

needed to get rid of Andrew

8:37

because of the shame and the embarrassment he brought on the

8:39

royal family, Galsley Dan, and

8:42

he's completely destroyed

8:44

any way that there is back for him.

8:46

And Harry is just basically writing

8:48

books, dissing the family that brought him up and gave

8:50

him everything. And all it is. Although it's

8:52

ghosted, he hasn't actually written anything at all

8:54

because we don't think he's capable of doing that. So

8:56

there's no role for them in in

8:58

future years. He's completely burnt his

9:00

bridges. you know, an

9:02

all because he wanted to get away from

9:04

the publicity. And then ever since then,

9:06

he's been milking the publicity.

9:08

You know, we all remember Harry dressing up as a

9:10

Nazi. Harry, you know, taking his

9:12

clothes off in a hotel room. Harry

9:15

drunk kicking out of, you

9:17

know, photographers when he was drunk coming

9:19

out of a night club. He's basically been

9:21

the on fault terrible and

9:23

and just trailed around after his

9:25

older brother and his wife. and sort of

9:27

either with them and there's Kate and there's

9:29

William and then, oh, there's Harry again.

9:31

You know, Harry was sort of trying to pretend he

9:33

was all fun. And it turns out he wasn't

9:35

having a nice time at all. It was all just

9:37

fake. It was just sort of giving us this

9:39

old sob story. Nothing worse than somebody's

9:41

ungrateful. Lots of advice in the

9:43

paper today. Get your car ready for

9:45

winter. So make sure you've filled up and

9:47

make sure you've got some deistra with you,

9:49

make sure that you've got a full tank of

9:51

petrol, nothing worse than being stuck

9:53

somewhere and you've got no thing. And

9:55

make sure as well that you're a member of either

9:57

the AA, the RAC, green flag, or any

9:59

one of a number of other companies that will

10:01

come out and look after your car, should it break

10:03

down in the middle of nowhere? which I have

10:05

seen on the motorways quite a lot recently.

10:08

Cars just they just break down

10:10

or they just sit there and you think, oh,

10:12

no. I did I did sometimes think I should wind

10:14

down the window and go Sucker. And I thought,

10:16

no. You can't do that. That's mean.

10:18

That's mean. So I never say anything at all. I

10:20

feel incredibly sorry for them because obviously

10:22

it could happen to me. I could drive

10:24

over a nail or a screw or something like

10:26

that. The next thing, but I call the REC

10:28

out to get the get the tire done,

10:30

which is which is a big pain.

10:32

very big pain. I mean, I can do it, but

10:34

it's better if they do because they've got the electrical

10:36

equipment. I've only got a little little jack

10:39

to sort of get the get the things sorted

10:41

out. I can change a tire. Yes. Oh,

10:43

yeah. I can change tires. Those tires

10:45

on my car, they're huge. They're

10:47

like tractor tires. They're really, really big,

10:49

three hundred and fifty nicker a time. if

10:51

you please. But no,

10:53

obviously, that's why I joined the RAC for

10:55

goodness. They're so expensive. And

10:59

84850 David LBC

11:02

dot co dot u k, Thomas, Edinborough.

11:05

I like Edinborough. to go to Glasgow an awful lot, then

11:07

I started going to Edinburgh. And Edinburgh was

11:09

far more touristy, far more Americans

11:11

going around in kilts. they would

11:13

trace their family history back and discover they had

11:15

a link somewhere. But he said for months and

11:17

months, I've heard you speak about David Beckham and the silver

11:20

shilling over Qatar. glad to sit finally

11:22

getting traction in the press where Joe likes it, but

11:24

you definitely got there first. Yes? Absolutely. We

11:26

were there first weeks and weeks and

11:28

weeks. Yes. David Beckham, a disgrace. I don't

11:30

care what anybody says. I couldn't give a

11:32

toss whether we're supposed to go, oh, we love you,

11:34

David Beckham. We are very good for this he's taken they

11:36

reckon a hundred and fifty million from Qatar,

11:39

and so far he said nothing. So

11:41

far he said nothing as Joe Lai

11:43

said said, What do his gay fans think about

11:45

him? The answer is very little.

11:47

Very, very little because he doesn't care about

11:49

you. So why should you care about

11:51

him? Niall

11:53

says, I'm an airline pilot. I've been part

11:55

of an airline that went bust. It's

11:57

not good. Especially if you have children

11:59

in a mortgage. Well, there's a there's a piece in the paper

12:01

today of a woman, she's having to

12:03

sell her house because she can't

12:05

afford the mortgage. And she

12:07

thinks it's only going to get worse, so she's trying

12:09

to sell it so that she

12:11

can get some money in beforehand. Now it depends

12:13

how long you've had the mortgage, whether you've got equity

12:15

in it. I can remember when there was negative

12:17

equity in a lot of properties. I mean, I don't have

12:19

a mortgage. I'm lucky, but it costs

12:21

me the best parts of

12:23

Sorry. What's the matter? What?

12:25

Negative equity. In other words, your mortgage is bigger

12:27

than what the property is worth. That

12:30

happened years ago. Lots of people were living

12:32

in a property. but that

12:34

they were paying for but they didn't have any

12:36

equity in it. So my mortgage, when it

12:38

was nearly paid off, however

12:40

much, it was worth five hundred hundred thousand whatever,

12:42

I can take a percentage of that because

12:44

that's how much equity I've got in the property.

12:47

But luckily for me, I decided to pay off the

12:49

mortgage, so I didn't have to pay that anymore.

12:52

And because of the because when I

12:54

when I took it out years ago, it was one of

12:56

those linked to a

12:58

pension pot kind of thing, an

13:00

insurance policy. And depending on how that

13:02

performed, determined on how quickly you paid it

13:04

off, and they kept writing to me, which was,

13:06

you know, there's a shortfall on your mortgage

13:08

We think there's a shortfall. Do not ignore this

13:10

letter and it was all in red and everything and of course

13:12

I ignored it because I

13:14

thought, well, I can afford to pay it. But

13:17

if I wanted to pay off the mortgage, I think it

13:19

cost me about thirty six thousand to

13:21

pay it off because they said there's a

13:23

shortfall. In other words, the policy

13:25

did not perform as well, and so

13:27

this is how much money you owe. So I paid

13:29

it, shuffled things around a bit, and

13:31

got it paid off. And now I don't have a a

13:33

mortgage I feel for anybody who's

13:35

recently taken out a mortgage. Young

13:37

people, bad enough as it is, but you

13:39

take out a mortgage, And then all of a

13:41

sudden, it's going up by how much?

13:43

You know, some of them, it's quite

13:45

substantial, but to happy

13:47

things in a moment. We like happy things.

13:49

It's think happy thoughts. Coupa tea

13:51

would be the first happy thought this morning,

13:53

so let's all go and get a cup of tea, shall we in a

13:55

minute? Steve, hello.

13:57

On LV see. Morning. Nice to be

13:59

company. Nineteen minutes past four.

14:01

Nineteen minutes past four. So the royal

14:03

family of dispensed with Harry

14:05

Charles has now taken

14:07

steps to ensure that neither

14:09

Harry nor Andrew get anywhere near

14:11

the throne of this country. So

14:13

so that's quite good news, isn't it? I mean, if he wants to

14:15

go live in America, let him go live in America. Let

14:17

me cares. Just don't start dissing the

14:20

royal family. you know, you're not really much

14:22

yourself. Children as young as twelve

14:24

have been arrested for throwing fireworks

14:26

at police. mean, you do

14:28

sometimes worry, don't you about the mentality

14:30

of some of these kids who's selling them

14:32

fireworks. A twelve year

14:34

old child who is selling them, they're being sold

14:36

to older children who was selling them onto the

14:38

kids. That's how they get their booze. Isn't

14:40

it the corner shops? Also,

14:42

the girls and boys rejoicing at the Blair

14:45

reunion. I I don't know

14:47

enough about blur to

14:49

comment either way, but look at these mint

14:51

pies. They've got cream in the middle of them. So who

14:53

is this an advert for? This is farmer

14:55

Christmas, which that was a very clever play on

14:57

words. Pharma Christmas and they're all sort

14:59

of looking at all the food and it just looks

15:01

absolutely delicious. Is it Morrisons? I've

15:03

definitely got to go there and find these mint pies with cream

15:06

in. Cream in mint pies. I mean,

15:08

now it's just pushing the boat. It is a

15:10

bit indulgent, isn't it? I mean, luckily,

15:12

don't need to worry about our weight, you know. We are

15:14

what we are. Welcome to the world of mister

15:16

Blobby. But I like the idea of calling

15:18

him far more Christmas, Morrisons. Yeah.

15:20

I think that's quite good, actually. Seven hundred

15:22

and eighty thousand years ago cast your mind

15:24

back. What was going on?

15:27

I was born, yes, no.

15:29

Cavemen were cooking fish suckers

15:31

apparently. Cavemen were cooking fish

15:33

suckers. And I remember thinking

15:35

so. They got to wait something,

15:37

haven't they? What were they doing going around killing

15:39

dinosaurs or something? I don't even know what would

15:41

have been around seven hundred and eighty thousand

15:43

years ago. But I like the

15:45

idea that they they were cooking fishuppers.

15:48

Moving fishuppers. Yes. And it's just some of

15:50

those things you dug up in the in the

15:52

garden. my dear. Well, I don't I

15:54

don't know round things, you know, brush the

15:56

earth off them because they didn't know the word

15:58

potato. So where did

15:59

potatoes come from? I worry about

16:02

these things. You know? But,

16:03

you know, having fish because they used

16:05

to catch fish, and then they would then they would

16:07

cook it. I'm going to a fish

16:10

restaurant on Thursday. And

16:12

a funny thing is out of all the

16:14

things that I eat. Fish is not top of

16:16

my list. It's way down. Strange that I

16:18

can do scampi and

16:20

fish fingers. but

16:22

when I've had scampian restaurants,

16:24

it's sometimes it's not done in the batter. It's

16:26

obviously the common ways have it done.

16:28

They just do it in sort of garlic

16:30

and everything not quite nice,

16:32

but I prefer not just yeah. I

16:34

prefer the batter. Yeah. Or something that

16:36

doesn't look like it's the original

16:38

object. which is much peed which

16:40

much easier. Steering back in the

16:42

eighties, I purchased my first property.

16:44

And between exchange of contract

16:46

and completion, interest rate went up two percent.

16:48

Luckily enough, I could still pay

16:50

it. But I got no government help since

16:52

Paul. No. No. I just I think

16:54

there was only one time I'd borrowed money on

16:56

my mortgage. I went through

16:58

a lean period about forty years

17:00

ago. And and I

17:02

borrowed, I think, twenty thousand pounds. So

17:04

of course, that's added onto it.

17:06

And so you then got I forget how

17:08

big my mortgage was at the time, but it wasn't it

17:10

wasn't particularly huge. but it was

17:12

enough for me to go. It used to be a big deal

17:15

as many people listening to this program will

17:17

tell you, when you paid off your mortgage, you

17:19

get we paid the mortgage off. not

17:21

owe owe us any more money. It is now officially

17:23

your property. I was like, yes. And

17:25

I was very excited. Very excited. I

17:27

mean, I didn't have a huge mortgage.

17:30

but it was it was sort of

17:32

quite quite easy to sort of get it. So I just

17:34

had to come up with the original thing because

17:36

originally I got a bit panicking and they said it was a

17:38

shortfall and I thought say I can't afford the

17:40

shortfall. If they'd said it was fifty sixty

17:42

thousand, I'd be pushing it. To

17:44

try and pay it up at thirty thirty six

17:46

thousand, I suddenly realized I

17:48

had saved up. You know,

17:50

everybody's got a little, what they call, a nest

17:52

egg. It's something there for a

17:54

rainy day, and I've had a

17:56

couple of couple of days over the

17:58

years, mainly days where all of a

18:00

sudden you fill out the world is collapsing and they keep

18:02

asking you for money, you're starting, I'm not paying

18:04

it. I'm not paying it. Just one of those things.

18:06

SUELLO decided to tackle small

18:08

boats, so they'll just move to big boats

18:10

crossing the channel. Why would they bother with

18:12

small boats? Apparently, we are we are gonna

18:14

pay the French. That's all we do nowadays,

18:16

isn't it? They could have done this years ago. They

18:18

literally could have done this years ago when this first

18:20

started. Eighteen million, I think, they're

18:22

paying. French, whether that's a year? I think it might be a year. And

18:24

you think just said, well, why didn't we do this a long

18:26

time ago? Have they have they just come up

18:28

with it now? They are useless, aren't they?

18:30

They really are. plus the

18:33

pictures of the insurance, the

18:35

ship out in Antarctica

18:37

is it. And pictures coming in from

18:39

the deep and there it is perfectly preserved. If they

18:42

brought it up, there would be problems. Is there

18:44

any cause of the temperature of the water that's keeping the

18:46

Blue Moon thing together with the bridge?

18:48

and all the rest of it when you actually look at it.

18:52

And it's it's I mean, it is just

18:54

amazing. They said you can almost hear the

18:56

voices on board. So that's

18:58

what it looked like there. Oh, no. Across

19:00

across they're back back that that

19:02

one. That was photograph taken when they had to get

19:04

everything off because the ice was closing

19:06

in and it was cracking the boat because once ice closes

19:08

in, so that was taken at

19:10

the time and then

19:13

it sank They had all the pictures of it

19:15

sinking as it was swallowed by the

19:17

ice, and it rests on the bottom. Ernest

19:19

Shackleton's long lost ship HMS

19:22

Insurance. And now they've

19:24

got pictures of it down there

19:27

with the name Insurance. I

19:29

mean, it's quite something, isn't it? I think

19:31

so. I love stuff like that. I think that's

19:33

absolutely amazing. Love a bit

19:35

of history. My friend Chris

19:38

said, Yay. You're coming for

19:40

lunch. He says, the lamb is sensational. Don't

19:42

tell me, I can't eat lamb. I'm making it sound like there's huge

19:44

obstacle course, Chris. There isn't there

19:46

isn't. I don't dare I find somebody who can eat

19:48

salmon and all sorts of like, but

19:51

lamb I became allergic to about four years

19:53

ago. And I used to eat lamb all

19:55

the time. I love lamb. I used to

19:57

eat it all the time and I woke up one night.

19:59

I'd

19:59

had lamb casserole

20:02

and just normal lamb casserole and

20:05

it was delicious with vegetables and

20:07

potatoes and things like that. And I woke up in the middle of the

20:09

night and thought, oh, god, I'm gonna be sick. Now

20:11

I don't know about you, but some people are very good with

20:13

being sick. They're just they're just sick and

20:15

then they carry on drinking. I've seen that happen

20:17

loads of occasions. Not me. I

20:20

make a big drama out it. I have been

20:22

known to open the front door and sit stark

20:24

naked in the front door. trying

20:26

to breathe in cold night air to try and

20:28

stop myself being sick. And you think, oh, that's

20:30

good. I feel better now. So you shut the front door, you

20:32

stand up with it, and we'll be shook again. It

20:34

just follows a dreadful routine

20:37

where you're sort of trying desperately not to be sick

20:39

and anything. I'll lie on the settee, but I'll

20:41

put a towel over me. just

20:43

in case I'm gonna be ill, I don't want to be ill

20:45

over the city. And

20:47

and so I put it down to the land, but

20:49

I didn't know So two days later, I I

20:51

was finally worship, had lamb

20:54

again, exactly the same thing I'm. Three

20:56

times, I tried it to make sure that it really

20:58

was lamb. And obviously, I've got an

21:00

allergy to lamb. I don't know. It's old. I

21:02

don't ask me why we've all got allergy

21:04

allergies to to different bits and

21:06

pieces. Oh, by the way, Chris, I shall send

21:08

that number over to

21:10

you very shortly. I'm gonna find a pen

21:12

in the studio, write my

21:14

brother's name, number to his

21:16

name down. is number down and

21:18

then then you can you can have that. So

21:20

that's good. And you need to tell me a

21:22

time for Thursday as well because I

21:24

don't know a time, but I'm assuming it's gonna be

21:26

two o'clock or one thirty, probably

21:28

one thirty, two o'clock, something like

21:30

that. Oh, don't don't worry. I should get

21:32

there. It's quite a busy week this week. I don't know

21:34

why all of a sudden this week has now turned out

21:36

to be the week that everything

21:38

is piling in, you know, meetings, and

21:40

this, and rage out today, and,

21:42

you know, it's it's what we

21:44

have to to get used to,

21:46

I think. Flights canceled, as

21:48

I says, is that do check on

21:50

on your flight today because if the fog

21:52

is so bad, the flights will not

21:55

fly. they will be sitting there for ages. What was

21:57

the other one? What was the other one I

21:59

quite like? Oh, the the late queen, the

22:01

late her majesty did not like

22:03

her hands. And I

22:05

remember when we saw those

22:07

last couple of days before she dyed

22:09

pictures, her hands looked terrible. And

22:11

I remember thinking, I wonder if that's that's

22:13

what it's like. I suppose. TV legend Jay Leno

22:15

has suffered burns. He

22:17

collects cars. He turns up, he's got a garage full

22:19

of cars, and this one burst into

22:22

flames. And apparently, he's been

22:24

he's been quite badly scarred.

22:27

So we wish him the very best of

22:29

luck, poor soul on us. So

22:31

it's terrible. and ketchup

22:33

and up. Ketchup and

22:35

up because food prices are doubling. And it's all

22:37

the sources. It's all the stuff you like.

22:40

where I'm partial to a bit of Hellman's real mayonnaise.

22:42

I stick that on anything. I,

22:44

you can have that on anything you like

22:46

on potatoes, on vegetables, on

22:49

meat. on curry. Anything you want, you can

22:51

stick it on there, which is which is

22:53

what I like actually. And Cadbury is assembling

22:56

secret Santa loved ones. different

22:58

things. I never understood what secret Santa was. Is this where you

23:00

you work in a company and they say, well, you're gonna do

23:02

secret Santa and you go and buy a present

23:04

for a fiber. and then

23:07

you put them all in a bin and somebody picks something out.

23:09

Is that not secret Santa? Oh, you've

23:11

given a person's name

23:13

yet? And you

23:15

have to

23:16

buy a a gift for them.

23:18

Oh, right. That's so Dominic Ellis

23:20

and I go what could you

23:22

buy? The boy who's got everything. The answer is, I don't know.

23:25

And that oh, that's how it works, and so he then gets

23:27

a present from it. Why

23:29

me? Why why me? 0I0

23:32

right. Then

23:34

Corey picks it up. Oh, right. I see. That

23:36

secret Santa is it. And you put a you put

23:38

a a financial limit on how

23:40

much you'll spend it. Alright. Okay. What would be right?

23:43

Five pounds? Yeah.

23:45

You don't get a lot, do you? not

23:47

for ten pounds. Yeah.

23:52

Souks. It buys

23:54

people souks. You don't buy people's

23:56

socks to it. Well, I'd buy socks, but I mean, I don't

23:58

I wouldn't buy other people's socks.

24:00

It's like buying somebody else pants

24:02

or something like that. It's really

24:04

No. That's just weird. That's

24:06

very old. I bought

24:09

I bought Joe. a

24:12

father Christmas, which he's

24:14

gonna get to do. I'll tell

24:16

you what one it is because the

24:18

delivery date on these things now, I bought

24:20

the last three. one for me, one for my brother and one

24:22

for Joe, but it's an unusual father

24:25

Christmas. Here

24:27

he is.

24:27

He's he's

24:30

climbing up the side of a chimney.

24:32

When

24:32

he gets to the top of the chimney,

24:34

he goes inside the chimney and pops out

24:36

a door at the bottom and climbs up chimney again.

24:38

They're brilliant. How cool is

24:41

that? Leading

24:42

Britain's conversation, LBC,

24:46

with Steve Hallum.

24:48

Morning. Nice to have your

24:51

company. I think somebody's used that before. I don't

24:53

know. So Steve says Jane the canned food

24:55

for my dog increased in price in less

24:57

than two days. You don't think

24:59

about that, too. I mean, I I see people buying

25:01

their dog food in Costco and places

25:03

like that. because they're buying it in in it's

25:05

so and also depends whether they wet food

25:07

or dry food, same

25:09

for cats. They either eat dry food or they

25:11

eat wet food. Deb says

25:14

Morrison's mince pie with cream are in

25:16

the fresh cream cake section of the

25:18

stope. Sounds delicious,

25:20

doesn't it? Really nice. Steve, the

25:22

higher van is I

25:25

mean, I currently have broke down

25:27

on Saturday. And

25:29

it was only last night that the company managed to

25:31

sort out a replacement. I've been stuck in the

25:33

Brecon Beacons and there's definitely worse places to

25:35

be stuck still hellish, but not my repair

25:37

built, thank goodness. Oh, pardon me. I can't believe had. That was

25:40

not very good. Was it? That was not very

25:42

good at all. Steve, I paid my

25:44

mortgage office, Teri Vire equity release

25:46

in September, looks like

25:48

I timed it well with interest rates

25:50

going up. The Lily, Patula Clarke.

25:52

Oh, I met back in March. She's ninety years

25:55

young today. petula clark, many happy returns

25:57

of the day. And Shane

25:59

says, I'm trying to get your mug

26:01

on the Magic Circle Club. I can't buy it,

26:03

but because you're overseas. I'm

26:06

assuming it's because you're overseas. I don't know

26:08

the way around that, Saj. I shall try and find

26:10

out for you. And Pete the

26:12

poor man say say to Chris, no doubt he

26:14

will overtake me again at the

26:16

London marathon next year. He's very

26:18

consistent and he is

26:20

very consistent. He said, can you ask if he

26:22

ever did collect the bicycles from

26:24

Amsterdam? Well, I'm sure

26:26

he will he will tell me. He's obviously trying to get ready

26:28

for work at the moment, actually.

26:30

action bullshit. So did he ever collect the bicycles

26:32

from Amsterdam? Did you, Chris? Did

26:35

you? We'd love to we

26:37

need to know one of those things.

26:40

And and somebody says, yes, Morrison's do the

26:42

mince pies with cream. They're very little

26:44

paper cases and a larger than normal mince pies

26:46

they aren't a little. I love them and

26:48

should be getting some more today. Sounds

26:51

lovely. I like that.

26:54

And, Steve, you've got my Christmas tree. Would

26:56

it cost me over Forty pounds

26:58

with the Christmas farms said I was their hundred

27:01

customer and didn't have to pay Christmas tree farm

27:03

in Churtsy Town, well worth

27:05

it. Wow. Yes. but

27:07

probably

27:07

is very well. But if you get it for free,

27:09

I would I would think that's good. They've gone up

27:11

this year. They've

27:14

gone up And if you want a

27:16

real Christmas tree, you're gonna be paying a

27:18

little bit more for them. Let me

27:20

listen. It's only once a year. Let's

27:22

face it. We we do need a bit

27:24

of happiness little bit of

27:26

happiness. And

27:28

my friend Chris says to beat

27:30

the poor man, know that I've

27:32

still got the keys all ten

27:34

of them. That's it.

27:37

Two way family favorites isn't

27:39

everybody in this program. A low

27:41

gene over there at Aria if

27:43

co run. I don't

27:45

love it. So he's still he's still got

27:47

them, Pete, still got them. all ten of

27:49

the blumen things. I don't

27:52

know. I don't know. What's life all about?

27:55

Everything? Everything. And having said the

27:57

other day, the poor poor Johnny

27:59

Owen has got terminal cancer.

28:01

It's a case, really, it's who

28:03

are you doing? start

28:06

disrobing in the studio. It's very unnecessary.

28:10

Last thing I saw something as pale as

28:12

that. It was on a piece

28:14

of toast. So what

28:17

else we got?

28:19

What else we got for you today?

28:23

Chris says LGC put these

28:25

across the area that come over, then they can't get to the

28:27

English side and the French have to rescue them. A couple of

28:29

tugs drove them up to genuine

28:31

boats. But the trouble is I want to know

28:33

two things why they want to come here

28:35

for a start, you know,

28:38

while they want to meet me admittedly. But

28:40

Albanians are not fighting any war, anything like

28:42

that. As far as I know, there are other people. And

28:44

why is it predominantly blokes?

28:47

And where do

28:47

they get this money from? apparently,

28:49

if

28:49

you want to do the luxury crossing of the

28:51

channel, it's about eleven grand,

28:54

eleven thousand pounds, like,

28:56

I mean, I don't know who does all these things,

28:58

but it's terribly terribly,

29:00

terribly not honest. I work at a cake

29:02

shopping column down branch. I'm on my dive today.

29:04

The mince pies are not in the aisle.

29:07

goes straight to the cake shop, says

29:09

Sharon, there's sold impacts of two on offer

29:11

at the moment, two for three pound fifty.

29:13

You've tempted me on that one, Sharon. I do go

29:15

Paul Sam Morrison's on my way home on the

29:18

bus. So I

29:20

might I might have to just nip in

29:22

Yeah. I was gonna bring them in for the snack

29:24

desk, but but then I thought, no. The

29:26

the sandwiches went. So they

29:29

should've done what's smarter. What's

29:31

smarter now? It is weird. What the the sandwiches on there?

29:33

I should always bring in sandwiches. My

29:35

producer years and years ago, thirty years ago, I bring in

29:37

a sandwich. for them and

29:39

they used to thank me. And I started thinking it's got a bit expensive

29:41

to bring it a sandwich for

29:43

the producer every day.

29:45

But the two I brought in the other day, one was pigs in

29:48

blankets for mouth and spencers. In other words,

29:50

their their Christmas sandwich, which is

29:52

very tasty. very, very tasty.

29:54

I thought, you know, I thought it's healthy. Well, I

29:56

mean, I assumed it was healthy. It's got sort of

29:59

coleslaw and turkey bits and pieces in.

30:01

But if Sharon can tempt me,

30:03

packs of two on offer at the moment two for three

30:05

pound fifty. It's

30:07

the cream. You know what it is? You bite it

30:09

and all the cream comes out either side. You've got it

30:11

running down your chin and a little.

30:13

Goodness there. Happy days. Happy

30:15

days. I used to buy cream

30:17

horns. years ago. see those so often now. You see

30:19

cream slices, but cream horn, drip drip, and

30:21

you'd sort of eat it slowly around

30:24

the top. like eating

30:25

a a cornetto. You don't

30:27

just take

30:27

a bite, you eat it slowly around the top because

30:29

the ice cream goes all the way down to

30:31

the tip of it, and I used to love doing

30:34

those. Love it. They did another thing.

30:36

Why don't I buy in I just had a craving the

30:38

other day, and I get the most days, which

30:40

I'm quite grateful for. and I

30:43

bought slush puppies, but they're

30:45

in a form of lollies. And it's

30:47

like six for three

30:49

quid or something. It's so cheap so

30:51

so cheap. And my

30:54

friend Rich says, I'll

30:57

take

30:57

one of Chris' bikes.

30:59

It's nice. Chris will be delighted

31:02

because I'm running a

31:04

swap shop now. Do you remember that swap shop on the

31:06

television? Daily to run one on radio Trent.

31:08

It's called Trent Tradets with

31:10

Dale Winston. and you would phone up and go, Alore

31:12

Dale. I've got a bicycle. I'm

31:14

looking for a teddy bear, and somebody would phone up

31:16

and go, I've got a teddy bear. I'd like

31:18

a bicycle. And did you ever read the

31:20

story of that bloke who

31:22

started off with a

31:25

paper clip? and he

31:27

ended up with a house or some it

31:29

was something really bizarre. It was either a house or

31:31

a car or a boat or something. And

31:33

so he swapped that for a pencil. He

31:35

swapped the pencil for I don't

31:37

know rubber or so. I can't remember what it was, but it

31:39

was all these bizarre thing. I remember thinking

31:41

does that really work? But my friend

31:43

Rich, who works on radio x, and

31:45

is currently driving home He said

31:47

cars are right off. I'll take one

31:49

of Chris' bikes. He

31:51

doesn't have much luck I have to tell

31:53

you Chris with. with cars. It really does. Just when

31:55

he thought it was getting better, somebody

31:58

went into the back of him, which was

32:00

not good. So this is the

32:03

Canadian blogger, Kyle

32:05

McDonald, who

32:06

it's

32:07

it's called a red paper

32:10

clip. He traded his way from

32:12

a single red paper

32:14

clip to a house. In

32:16

fourteen online trades in the course

32:18

of a year, it says a lot of people

32:20

have asked me, how

32:22

I did it. He said, and the answer is I

32:24

have no idea. So do we know what

32:26

he what he swap? Yes. Have the list of what

32:28

he swaps. So Take note of this

32:30

because he he ended up at the house. So first of

32:33

all, he traded a paper

32:35

clip for

32:35

a fish shaped pen

32:38

Okay?

32:38

He then traded the pen the

32:40

same day for a hand sculpted doorknob

32:42

from Seattle. And then

32:44

two thousand and he went to

32:46

Amherst in Massachusetts with a friend

32:49

to trade the doorknob for a Coleman

32:51

Camp stove with fuel.

32:53

Then he went to California and traded the camp stove

32:55

for Honda generator. Then

32:57

he traveled to Mass Smith Queens,

33:00

traded the generator for an instant party, an empty

33:02

keg, an IOU fulfilling the keg

33:04

with beer in the bearer's choice, and a neon

33:06

Budweiser sign that was his second attempt to

33:08

make the trade His first resulted in

33:10

the generator being confiscated by the

33:12

fire department. On December two

33:15

thousand five, he traded the instant party

33:17

to but Quebec competed in a ready personality, Michael Barrett,

33:19

for a scree do snowmobile. I

33:21

mean, that's quite some going.

33:25

Within a week of that, he traded the

33:27

snowmobile for a two person trip to British

33:29

Columbia. On or about

33:31

Jan the seven two thousand and six,

33:33

traded the second spot on the YacTrip for

33:35

a box truck. You traded the

33:37

box truck. They were all photographed

33:40

there. On the second spot for

33:42

another box truck, traded that for a

33:44

recording contract with metalworks

33:46

in Ontario, April two

33:48

thousand and six traded the contract

33:50

to Jody Nant for a year's rent in

33:53

Phoenix. Then he traded the year's rent in

33:55

Phoenix for an afternoon with Alice Cooper.

33:57

Then he traded the afternoon with Cooper for

33:59

a kiss motorized snow

34:01

globe. Then he traded the snow globe

34:03

to Colby Benson for a role

34:05

in the film, Donna Ron

34:07

Demand. And two thousand and six, he traded the movie role for

34:09

a two story farmhouse in Kippling,

34:12

Saskatchewan, all from a

34:14

paper

34:14

clip. all from

34:15

a paper clip. See? There

34:18

is

34:18

hope. There is

34:19

hope. I don't have a

34:20

spare paper clip. No. No. The only thing I've got

34:22

to make me this morning, I've got to Sharpie. I

34:24

like sharpies. And I've

34:27

got my insulin. Want a

34:29

squirt of insulin? No. Yeah. You can't

34:31

have it. We'll kill you. It

34:33

would kill you. Yeah. Because you're not meant

34:35

to have it. So that's how a lot of

34:37

people have been killed, you know, by

34:39

unscrupulous people. They've injected them with within

34:42

Celine. So it's I mean, basically, you're you're

34:44

buying a killing machine, I think. But I

34:46

never let out my pocket

34:48

only to

34:49

It's quite dangerous

34:52

stuff actually. It's not dangerous as fireworks

34:56

obviously. Steve morning looked

34:58

at going out for Christmas dinner. They wanted ninety

35:00

quid each per person. I don't think it was spent

35:02

a hundred and eighty over the three days at Christmas. I

35:04

think ninety pounds is very cheap. I know you might not think so, but

35:06

I promise you that will just be for the basic food.

35:09

If you want booze, added

35:11

on top. That's how they make them. And you can

35:13

double those prices easily. So three hundred and

35:15

sixty pounds. I think Phil says it's Phil

35:17

from high wickham. when I occasionally

35:19

go back to Yorkshire to see my dad who lives in Skipton, he's a cleaner. And

35:22

when he comes home in the morning

35:24

from work, He

35:26

always calls into Morrison and get fresh tiger rolls and

35:28

chicken which is still warm. Oh, I like

35:31

tiger rolls. We have tiger rolls. They're

35:33

not. I'm you've got those. They're quite

35:36

expensive. crusty. Yeah. crusty. Very

35:38

nice. And out of

35:40

all your past producers, Steve, who was

35:42

the most charming and treated you the best. None of them. None none of

35:44

them. Do you want to make a big deal about it? No

35:46

none of them. They they they start off on

35:48

day one like, oh oh, Steve, a

35:50

bit like

35:52

that. and they're all very jolly in northern and I'm going hello,

35:54

and your name is. And then they they sort

35:56

of tell me their name

35:58

and that's it. It's a steady

36:01

slide down the hill, I'm afraid, to oblivion. You

36:03

know? He said to me today, he was talking to someone

36:05

the other day, and he mentioned the fact that he

36:07

was Steve Allen's producer.

36:09

I thought, don't tell

36:10

people that. It's unnecessary.

36:12

Don't need to start

36:15

telling

36:15

people.

36:16

I mean, it's just I just

36:19

find it really bizarre. Oh, I'm Steve Allen's Apparently, this this lady

36:21

couldn't believe it. Couldn't believe it.

36:23

Oh, there's somebody called

36:26

woody who might be listening at the

36:28

moment. I think there's three in his marriage.

36:30

Him, his wife, and me.

36:34

and Woody knows my postman,

36:36

Darren, which is Brandon. We're all very close

36:38

knit community. Close knit community.

36:41

And Darren's got a son who works in Robert

36:43

Dyer's in Richmond. Very tall bit like

36:45

you, Ellis. A bit like you. A

36:47

little bit of a tall,

36:49

hunky streak of Look at the time. Steve, hello,

36:51

on LVC, text 84850

36:54

Morning. Steve, I work for the NHS.

36:57

says Tim, I have to be up at four AM day after day

36:59

and still up at four AM, but it's my duty

37:02

to wake up and listen to. I should think

37:04

so too. I should think so

37:06

too. It is absolute. Well, you work for the NHS. I

37:08

was asking my driver this morning

37:10

whether or not his daughter, who

37:12

is a doctor, will be

37:14

striking and said, yes, I think so.

37:16

And she comes home in tears

37:18

sometimes because she

37:20

said this there's so many things you can't do. I've heard of

37:22

hospitals running out of

37:24

things. And you think to

37:26

yourself, it really shouldn't be in

37:28

the state It really should.

37:30

Somebody said to me, oh, it's a conspiracy

37:32

theory. They're running the

37:34

NHS down to sell it. I thought, why would you run it

37:36

down to sell it? You can sell it as it

37:38

is at the moment. It's exactly the same that we're

37:40

gonna be selling it off anytime

37:42

soon. But we're very lucky to have it.

37:44

Very lucky to have it. listening

37:46

to you talking about producers says Tony.

37:48

He says, do you need a producer

37:50

when you do all the donkey work?

37:53

You see? you're fallen that age old trick. Do

37:55

you need a producer? That's the

37:57

big question that is, has been asked over

37:59

the years by

38:02

radio presenters. even me. And they say, do you need a producer?

38:04

And I thought, well, actually, I

38:06

do. Not because they produce anything

38:08

for me. I have to produce

38:10

the goods but

38:12

they have to drive the desk. I can't drive a desk.

38:14

I'm totally and they they do offer

38:16

to make tea, but to be honest, I don't like

38:19

them touching the cups. I decide I sort of I'd

38:21

rather go and get my own tea because in the ad breaks,

38:23

that's what I do. I rush out of here, pick

38:25

the skirts up, run out, make

38:27

the cup of tea come back in again. But you you need to

38:30

produce I'll tell you what you need to produce for.

38:32

Well, apart from that, in this

38:34

particular building, most

38:36

presenters in here drive their own desks. I

38:38

don't think there are many

38:40

presenters in the stations that we

38:42

own who drive their who who don't

38:44

drive their own desk. at

38:46

LVC, people drive the desks for

38:48

them. And in my case, I couldn't drive

38:50

the desk, load

38:52

the adverts, and talk at the same time. You have to better concentrate on

38:54

on one thing or the other. You

38:56

need them as your sounding board. That's what

38:58

they're there for. So in other words, if you

39:00

say something, that is remotely

39:02

funny or interesting or

39:04

actionable. You know, you need them

39:06

there to do that. You need them there

39:08

to sort of to be your sounding boards. If you

39:10

look up and you've said something that you think is

39:12

remotely funny and they're

39:14

laughing, that's how you gauge it. You

39:16

gauge them. They are the audience that

39:18

you cannot see. you there

39:20

are hundreds and thousands of people

39:22

listening at the moment. I know that

39:24

because we've just had the latest figures. So I know

39:26

that there are hundreds of thousands of people listening.

39:29

And so, you know, if he laughs

39:31

and he's very difficult to please, it is

39:33

like it is like trying to make a

39:35

stone wall weep. you know,

39:37

sometimes he looks a little bit,

39:40

you know, it's a bit of it's all a bit,

39:42

but that's what you have to do. He's

39:44

there to make me. So in other

39:46

words, if he laughs, I think,

39:48

that works. So I can do

39:50

something like that. And if he goes, I like that,

39:52

but you just did it. He said, I

39:54

like the the the thing that you do on the program is said, well, you tell people about,

39:56

you know, forthcoming dinner dates

39:58

and all the rest of it. But I said, but that's

39:59

what the program is. The program

40:02

is about you know, what I get

40:04

up to because there is never I promise you a

40:06

day goes by where something doesn't

40:08

happen. There's always something, you know,

40:10

if either the you get down to the train and then you chatted I was talking

40:12

to my friend Lenny down at

40:14

Waterloo Station. He's

40:16

recently had bit of a heart

40:18

murmur kind of thing. And if every time

40:20

he sees me, I've got a couple of couple of

40:22

guys and girls down at Waterloo

40:24

Station who know what I do for a living and

40:26

all say morning, morning nice

40:28

to see or haven't seen you for a while.

40:30

And I I think that's really quite nice

40:32

actually because LBC's audience is so

40:34

vast and it's so

40:36

so diverse. I mean, it's

40:38

just about everybody. And so that's

40:40

why I need to produce they don't produce

40:42

anything for me. What he's

40:43

therefore is to if

40:45

I mention something, he can then go to the computer very

40:47

quickly and get something up on this. If I say, you know,

40:50

how does this bloke go from a paper clip to

40:52

a house? he goes, I'll get it

40:54

up for you and he puts it up on the screen and I

40:56

can see it. And that's that's what

40:57

they're there. So in fact, they they

40:59

do actually have have

41:01

a job to do. You know, I mean,

41:04

some of the I mean, mainly

41:06

mainly over the years, I've had really

41:08

good producers. if I haven't had a

41:10

particularly good producer, then they

41:12

move, you know, because you can't have

41:14

presenters who are not happy in the way

41:16

that they work. and mine

41:18

isn't regarded as one of the most difficult

41:20

programs to do. We don't shout and scream

41:22

and we don't sort of don't have little

41:24

tantrums or anything like that. Only a occasionally,

41:26

do we have a little tantrum? But, you know, you

41:28

want it to be right. It has to be right

41:30

because as I keep explaining to them, this is

41:32

a job. surprisingly,

41:34

a job where you, you know, you can

41:36

laugh, you can cry, you can get emotional,

41:38

you can help people out, you can raise

41:40

money for charity. We could do all sorts of things.

41:42

It's a job. It's a job at the end of the day, you know. So I've

41:44

I've said to them on on the the call

41:46

sheet for this program, the top of it is

41:48

always concentrate on what Steve's saying.

41:52

because if Steve looks up and you're chatting away because there's

41:54

always two of them behind the glass, not at the moment,

41:56

but there will be a half an hour. And and you're

41:58

chatting away, you think you're not concentrating on

42:00

what

42:02

I'm saying. and, you know, I'm the only one paid for talking.

42:04

But that's it. It's only ever happened on a

42:06

couple of occasions whereby

42:08

we had to get rid of a

42:10

producer. I mean, years about thirty years ago, we had to get

42:12

rid of a producer because basically, he didn't

42:14

wanna be there. He didn't so he used

42:16

to turn the speakers down in

42:18

the studio. In his side of it, in in the control

42:20

room, I wanted why we weren't having

42:22

any any joy, so I'd I'd be saying something like,

42:24

and I could tell you who

42:26

it was. John Warrington was in, and he wanted a cup of tea. And I said,

42:28

oh, John, I'd love a cup of tea because I do everything

42:30

live on the program. I don't sort of, you know, hold up a

42:32

sign saying tea

42:34

for John. And and as I said, oh, John would love a cup

42:36

of tea, looked up. No no

42:38

response whatsoever. And it

42:40

turned out that he'd got the speakers

42:42

turned down. So

42:44

as I say, he didn't last very long because you can't have that because

42:46

it spoils spoils a program, you know, you

42:48

put your heart and soul into something. And

42:52

the idea is we want to get an audience. You know, if I've got

42:54

six hundred thousand people listening, count

42:56

them, and a million downloads a

42:59

month, there's a reason. There's

43:01

a reason it's because of you who listen every morning, who listen on

43:03

the way into work, who drive taxes, who

43:05

drive buses, who drive trains, who work

43:07

at the stations, who

43:10

work for war but to all sorts of people. Ice creamian, Pete

43:12

the pool man, they all

43:14

become very essential parts of

43:18

a program. because people get to see them when we first did our one man

43:20

show. I was saying, oh, we've got

43:22

Naureen here and people. Where's Naureen?

43:24

They'd heard a mention they want to

43:26

see people. That's

43:28

that's what it is. It's people

43:30

meeting other people. And the reason that it

43:32

works is because you're all

43:34

got one thing

43:36

in common. you all listen to the radio at four AM in the morning to

43:38

this program. You know,

43:40

that's why, you know, if people say, what about the

43:42

spike? I said, but listen, of course, we have

43:44

a spike. because we

43:46

don't actually have any competition. There is

43:48

no no competition surprising though it

43:50

might be. There's other people who've tried

43:52

to take the

43:54

crown, but a waste of time we have them dealt with. You

43:56

know what I'm saying? I don't want to mention anything,

43:58

you know, bring in names like

43:59

the mafia. or anything like but

44:02

we have people dealt with on the program.

44:04

No messing with the Steve at all.

44:06

Doesn't the Cabot drive his own destiny?

44:08

Yes. One of the very few.

44:11

one of the very few people who does drive his

44:13

own desk. I mean, I've never been able to

44:15

drive a desk. I mean, I wouldn't even know where to

44:17

be no. Wouldn't know where to begin. Even after all the years,

44:19

even back in the days, I never ever drove

44:21

a desk. And

44:23

it served me

44:26

quite well. I don't want to learn

44:28

how to drive a desk. Why would I why would I

44:30

want to deprive somebody of a job ladies

44:32

and gentlemen?

44:34

And Steve, That's me off to Morrisons later, one of those fresh cream and spice.

44:36

They sound yummy. They wouldn't mean they sound

44:38

yummy. They look

44:40

very nice.

44:42

Steve, have they reopened the Burger King at

44:44

Waterloo? No. No. Nothing

44:47

at all. No. Yes.

44:50

Sort of shut at Paddington. I mean, it's been shut now. It must be

44:52

for a good two years. You know, it

44:54

must be shut for a good two years. to

44:58

save. Look, what I found in Costco the other

45:00

day says Al says to Joe. They

45:03

taste great with

45:06

HP sauce. I don't think I've had

45:08

HP's sauce for many a

45:10

time. These are three

45:12

onion baoji scotch eggs. They

45:15

look delicious. Don't lie? Oh, they look very

45:18

nice. A neat fusion of two

45:20

quintessential classics, a scotch egg with a

45:22

spicy vegetarian

45:24

twist. Three onion baoji, scotch eggs.

45:27

That's

45:27

nice,

45:30

isn't it? Why'd

45:31

you show me these things? Why'd you show me

45:33

these? You know I'm gonna have to cut the program

45:35

short this morning and go to Costco. I want to be first

45:38

in line. to get things

45:40

like that. Steve Jim O'clock says Dawn

45:42

with with Steve Allen. about

45:46

a spike on the day before,

45:48

the DailyStyle column writing because

45:50

Tuesday is training, cycling, fitness, work

45:53

balance. This is Dawn Newsome. who

45:55

is about one of the fittest people. I think how how

45:57

she finds time to fit everything in

46:00

and all the television programs. I mean,

46:02

she must it's just more than her

46:04

fair share. and and still manages to cram in a holiday every so

46:06

often, but Tuesday is

46:08

gym a clock. gym a clock

46:10

and then she'll come back and then she'll

46:14

start writing. And that's it. What she's gonna put in there? I've got no idea. I

46:16

thought I thought I quite like the story that people are

46:18

now complaining about Matt Hancock that he's

46:20

being bullied. in

46:22

the jungle because they keep picking him for the bush tucker trials is because they

46:24

don't like him. There's a whole lot you can

46:27

do about that. Not a lot. but

46:29

we'll wait and see what happens. As long as I don't have

46:31

to put up with any more of Olivia

46:34

atward. Thank you very much indeed. Okay. You came out.

46:36

We know you're anemic. End

46:37

of story. Okay. Let's move on.

46:39

Shawee. That would be nice. Let's have

46:41

the news.

46:44

This is

46:47

Elisa from global, leading Britain's

46:50

conversation with

46:52

Steve Allen. Morning

46:58

a really nice happy

46:58

company. Welcome along to early breakfast

47:01

on LBC, Tuesday. November the

47:03

fifteenth, they're

47:04

still going.

47:05

with

47:06

the Cristiano Ronaldo

47:08

story, who's accused Gary Neville, of

47:10

criticizing him to get more fame.

47:13

And this all stemmed from a

47:15

Piers Morgan interview. I don't

47:17

know why, actually. They're sort of sort of

47:19

trying to drum this up. He says, I don't talk

47:21

to these people Don't like this,

47:24

don't like that, and all the people around there are

47:26

going, you know, what's going

47:28

on? What is going on? Why is he saying all

47:30

these things? And you think, well, because he's doing an

47:32

interview with Peter Smolgan, That's the only reason

47:34

I can't think of anything else. One of

47:36

the racist murderers of teenager Steven

47:38

Lawrence has been left scarred for life

47:40

in a blade attack in prison. This is

47:42

David Norris. found with blood pouring from his face after two other

47:44

inmates slashed him from his

47:46

forehead to

47:48

his chin. unbelievable.

47:50

This pair of convicted burglars

47:52

had called him outside his cell before

47:54

setting upon him with makeshift shanks

47:57

which knives made from razor blades melted

48:00

into prison toothbrasso, brushes.

48:02

You can't make it up. Can you really take

48:04

in the hospital? He could be permanently disfigured.

48:07

and police were investigating the

48:10

source of the attacks. They've got the

48:12

name of the two people, they were burglars,

48:14

put on report and slung

48:16

into segregation. Just really,

48:18

as mayor Norris was jailed for life

48:20

in twenty twelve over the murder of

48:22

Stephen at a bus stop in Eltham.

48:24

The thug, son of notorious South London mobster, Clifford Norris, was

48:26

part of a five strong mob who

48:29

targeted innocent Steven in a

48:32

racist attack. One of them, Gary

48:34

Dobson, was convicted

48:36

alongside Norris and also Joe for life, Jamie

48:38

of Court. And his brother, Neil, were both arrested

48:40

over the murder, but neither was ever convicted.

48:43

a fifth man Luke Knight was never arrested

48:45

or charged. And last

48:48

night, the prison service spokesman said

48:50

a prisoner HMP dartmoor is being treated in hospital for

48:52

non life threatening injuries following an assault

48:54

by two prisoners. Don't you go in

48:56

prison, do you? It's bad. I don't know if it's safe for actually

48:58

out on

49:00

the streets. than it is inside prison. But obviously,

49:02

people take the launch of their own

49:04

hands. England released their official World

49:06

Cup Team photo, casual look

49:08

for Qatar, they're

49:10

all wearing sort of gray suits, sort

49:12

of white tops, gray zip up jackets, and

49:14

trousers with black marks and spenser shoes.

49:16

So they've obviously haven't spent any money

49:20

on it. Well, it's a lot of pairs of shoes to buy, and

49:22

they're all here. And the three

49:24

lines fly to the world cup on

49:26

gay pride. on a gay pride

49:28

jet to show a red card to Qatar's

49:30

intolerance. Yeah. It doesn't make any difference

49:32

to them. They're still going aren't they? They're still

49:34

going. Also,

49:36

a galaxy of stars or, you know, I don't I don't think there

49:38

really stars at all. We're out in

49:40

force last night at the twenty twenty

49:42

two TV Choice Awards. including

49:45

Love Island winner, Ikin

49:48

Su. The twenty eight year old

49:50

sparkled in the glamorous steaks as did Denise

49:52

van Outen who must be at

49:54

seventy by now and she's still

49:56

there doing it. Reality is Joey

49:58

Essex and is dancing on ice

49:59

partner Vanessa. looked at the part at the event poor old Joey Essex. He's kind of

50:02

lost the plot arena. You just sort of see a

50:04

photograph of him. He just looks vacant.

50:06

Just looks vacant. Shirley Ballas

50:08

was there. Interior

50:10

designer launched Lillian Bone and his wife,

50:12

and but it's TV

50:14

Choice. I don't even know what that is.

50:17

that so many of these awards are, and he's even

50:19

I get confused by them. But Denise and

50:21

Adam was there. I don't know what

50:23

what she's there for. was she hosting? I don't know. You can never

50:25

tell with half of these things. ousted camp

50:27

mate, Olivia Atwood,

50:30

says I just feel fine now.

50:32

Yes, enough already did. Okay? We've heard we've

50:34

heard the story we don't care. Okay. Move on.

50:36

She said, oh, I'd love to go back in the jungle.

50:39

what? So we can pay you for doing no work again?

50:41

I don't think so. I don't think so.

50:43

She spent twenty four hours in the jungle, and then she

50:45

was rushed to ANE. And

50:48

despite getting the all clear,

50:50

she's she's droned on about it to just about

50:52

everybody. She told this

50:54

morning, you know, and then she was on the

50:56

front page of the mail on Sundays or the front page. It just it just you

50:58

know, so she was on it and now she's not on

51:00

it. Okay. She's fine.

51:02

It's good. and she

51:04

said she's not watching the show due

51:06

to her fear of missing

51:08

out, which is called Foamo. I'm

51:10

Foamo, fear of

51:12

missing out. She said, I may not be watching it. Made me sad. I had

51:14

FOMO. I wanted to jump in the

51:16

telly. Yeah. I won't ever

51:18

do. I

51:20

won't ever No. We've we've seen you in it. Thank you very much indeed. Did a couple

51:22

of little little bush

51:24

tucker trials as they call them? Not as

51:26

many as

51:28

Hancock. But no, we don't want you back again. We've

51:30

already seen it. It's not a surprise anymore now. Favorites of some food items

51:33

have gone up. Heinstomato

51:36

ketchup, up fifty three percent.

51:38

I like ketchup. It's nice with

51:40

little sausages and things like that. Don't you like

51:42

that? That's quite nice, isn't it quite tasty?

51:45

Dolmio lasagna sauce, up forty

51:47

seven percent Heinz classic cream of chicken.

51:49

I never buy cream of chicken.

51:51

I

51:51

never buy I only ever

51:54

buy tomato. I have had chicken, but the piece have you seen the pieces? They're less

51:56

than an eighth and inch across. I mean, they're really

51:58

tiny, tiny. Orange cream, it's

51:59

marters soups up forty four percent, but

52:02

that's just viable as far as I'm

52:04

concerned, taste delicious. Coleman's

52:06

whole shredded sauce I've never had. Coleman's

52:09

classic mint sauce I've never had. And

52:11

bachelor's super noodles, beef flavor, forty three

52:13

percent up, and Hovis

52:16

granary, up forty three percent as well. So

52:18

everything's going

52:20

up. probably, you know, if you're in AAA

52:22

family, I should imagine a bottle of ketchup doesn't

52:24

go very far. But if you buy yourself,

52:28

Bola ketchup goes for ages. Am I the same?

52:30

You know, I'm generally buy my

52:32

Hellman's Real mayonnaise, the squirty

52:35

variety in Costco. and because

52:37

you get three in a pack. And

52:40

so that lasts a long time. And if

52:42

I go down to my brother, I'll give him

52:44

a heather a sort of a

52:46

squeezy bottle of it and it goes for

52:48

ages. I've never run out of anything. It's

52:50

sort of and I like to give. I'm

52:52

more of a giver than anything else. you know, I think it's

52:54

necessary. Paul

52:58

sorry. Pete, the poor man, says

53:00

you have meetings and get ups.

53:02

Well, we have the the shows every year. We

53:04

have the

53:05

shows every year.

53:06

And So

53:09

we've got the one which is coming up in

53:12

February at the Leicester Square

53:14

Theatre that's sold out. They all sell out really

53:16

quickly. Normally within

53:18

the hour, In fact, actually, we had a waiting list because

53:20

people say, I can't get through at

53:21

the moment. The waiting list had sixteen hundred

53:23

people on it. thousand

53:26

hundred people waiting because it says you are number one

53:28

thousand six hundred and you

53:30

have to wait.

53:31

And the magic Circle

53:33

shows in December both sold out as well. There

53:35

is a waiting list you can put

53:38

yourself on to. And if a seat

53:40

becomes available, they will phone you and say

53:42

we've got a seat you still you Yeah.

53:44

Sixteen hundred seats become available in a

53:46

four hundred seat theater. I think very

53:49

unlikely. Very unlikely. Steve

53:52

locked into the spike says, Walsh, as always, is getting

53:54

cold at night. Have you noticed? Absolutely. Absolutely.

53:58

This morning's a bit bit nippy

53:59

out there. little bit

54:02

nipping. Steve says Sarah,

54:04

Arty Barber is a hundred and one today. She's

54:06

a hundred and one going on sixty. A survivor

54:08

of cancer, and today is the last session

54:10

of my current cancer a treatment. Antibaba

54:12

is an inspiration, family visiting

54:14

today. I like that. Shane

54:18

and Sydney, Tada Swift says it's

54:19

dangerous down here on the beaches. I'm an

54:21

Aussie in my sixties. I'd never had any trouble though

54:23

I hadn't been to the beach for years. I watched it when

54:25

they did Bondi.

54:28

a program on the Bondi guys there. And the amount of people who've gone

54:30

the beach and robbed people is quite phenomenal. And

54:32

also a lot of let's just call

54:34

them dirty people. Dirty people.

54:38

and they take photographs of girls and they touch inappropriately on the

54:40

beach and they have to call the police. And that

54:42

was I think it's called Bondi Rescue

54:44

or something. Whatever it is, it's

54:47

It was a very good program with sort of

54:49

hidden cameras and the boys going out there

54:51

and stopping people

54:54

from behaving inappropriately. There you go. Bondi

54:56

Rescue. They're all real

54:58

people. They they're they're very well known

55:00

all

55:00

these lifeguards on Bondi

55:02

Beach. and they have

55:04

to put out, you know, do daring rescues

55:06

and everything else. But it's it's quite

55:08

a good idea. I've I've never been to Bondi

55:10

bait, never been to Australia.

55:12

That would be hard. That's what I look like with me shirt off. picture there, that's

55:14

the one on the right. Say again,

55:16

that's what I look like earlier. bit

55:20

difficult when you see your body mirrored back at you, isn't it

55:22

on some of these sort of things? That's how

55:24

it goes. But they were also swapping people.

55:26

People would sit down next are

55:28

some bags which were left there, cover them over with their towel then just casually pick

55:31

them up and walk off and they will

55:33

chase these people. And it turns out they had

55:35

history. Yeah. They do it.

55:37

They're with Motte. Maps. Alright.

55:39

Put a map on

55:40

the top. Yes. Yes. Yes. You gotta

55:42

be very careful. Excuse me. Uh-huh.

55:46

Mhmm. Mhmm. That's better. Yeah.

55:48

You've got to be very careful. So that's probably the

55:50

only reason that they say, Shane, that it's dangerous on

55:52

the beaches.

55:54

is because people we used to do it when we were little, but luckily when I was

55:57

little, you know, nobody makes stuff. You could

55:59

trust people. And you

55:59

put your your bag and your wallet under

56:02

a towel,

56:04

And that

56:04

would be it. Nowadays, people will sit down, they've seen that people

56:07

target you deliberately, you know, scum of

56:09

the earth as

56:09

far as I'm concerned.

56:12

Really dreadful.

56:14

Steve, Steve. Steve, looking forward to

56:16

a good show, says Elliott.

56:18

It's not you, is it

56:20

somebody else? Imagine

56:22

somebody else with your name. What an embarrassment? What an

56:24

embarrassment? No. You're not looking to that. Why would you

56:26

look forward to the show? You've heard it before. heard

56:30

There's nothing new on this show. Elliott tries

56:32

to give me funny lines, but

56:34

it just doesn't work, you know. Some people

56:36

are naturally

56:38

funny. Elliott is not naturally funny. He's the sort of person people

56:40

laugh at not with.

56:42

And it was not funny. That's the trouble.

56:44

It really is not. No.

56:48

You know, his latest one is what's red and sits in the corner,

56:50

a naughty strawberry. And I went, listen,

56:52

we don't want that that kind of feeble

56:55

you know, joke of my expense. Thank you very much

56:58

indeed. But that's the best you guys.

57:00

But he he does have a a

57:02

popsicle group. a little bit

57:04

combo and they are playing this

57:06

week, I believe. And

57:08

he's very excited. They have four

57:10

fortunes that they've rehearsed. which is three more

57:12

than the Beatles who just had my

57:14

body, lies

57:14

over the oceans. They played Alimfonieton. Another

57:18

love islander, And this is Zara McDermott, very happy

57:20

with her size ten body. I don't see why

57:22

it should make any difference. Now, of course,

57:24

she's skinny as a

57:26

rich and Critics said my

57:28

skinny pictures were triggering, but they were

57:30

right. And so it goes on. It's all to do

57:32

with a television program called

57:34

disordered eating. It's like, can

57:36

you think of anything that we can make a television

57:38

program about? Well, it used to be a size ten,

57:40

which as long as I'm concerned,

57:42

appears normal. you know, and then they there was a backlash and then

57:44

she it was a skinny thing. She said I was told

57:46

so many times I was fat, and

57:48

there's a finite amount of

57:49

times you can hear that. before

57:51

you start to believe it. But that's the problem, isn't

57:53

it? It's believing it. You know, you have to

57:55

sort of get on with it. It's not necessarily an

57:57

eating disorder. It's because you don't have

58:00

any work. Otherwise, she's now a size six, if you

58:02

please. And to me, she looks as though she looks

58:04

like Victoria Beckham. Looks like she needs

58:06

a good

58:08

meal. Victoria Beckham, even when you see pictures of her, she's

58:10

thin, thin, thin, thin, so

58:12

you can imagine a real life

58:15

what she looks

58:16

like. And the answer is even thinner

58:18

because television makes you put on

58:20

weight. So if you're slightly

58:24

overweight, and you go on television, you look even

58:26

worse. It depends. You know, I've I've seen

58:28

people on television saying, I'm not bothered about

58:30

being fat. I don't

58:32

care. I don't care that I'm overweight. I'm eating

58:34

this. I eat that and I drink and I

58:36

smoke and and eat all the worst

58:38

things. You can see that, you know, it's people in fast

58:40

food shops. You know, people

58:42

eating, we're all supposed to eat a healthy

58:44

lifestyle. What? We don't. We

58:46

absolutely don't. Why would we

58:48

want to? you know, you eat what you what you feel makes you happy. I

58:50

wouldn't ever bow to peer pressure. Somebody's

58:52

saying, oh, you need to lose weight, Steve. I'm well

58:54

aware of what I need to do. I don't need to be told

58:56

by anybody. somebody should write

58:58

into me and go, you're really fat at a go. Well, actually,

59:00

I'm not really fat at

59:02

all. You know, I'm just

59:04

moderately displaced you know,

59:06

with my food inside me. I

59:08

eat what I like to eat. It's as simple

59:10

as that. I don't eat a lot of fried stuff. I don't

59:12

eat a lot of Chinese takeaways, which I

59:14

could eat. all day long. You know, I have Kentucky fried

59:16

chicken probably about once every two

59:18

months. Once every two months. So

59:20

I'm quite

59:20

good with doing it. admittedly,

59:24

I'd probably drink a lot of

59:26

Prosecco. But so far,

59:27

my liver functions

59:30

are perfect. and I

59:30

get regularly checked. So I seem to be doing okay, but,

59:32

you know, if somebody said to it's when it's when

59:35

people say, oh, somebody told me I was fat and I

59:37

burst into tears and I think you

59:39

really must get a grip on it. You have to get a

59:41

grip on it. It's, you know, otherwise, you let yourself get

59:44

carried away. And I'm gonna be carried away

59:46

now because it's just going quarter pass

59:48

five. We got the latest LBC travel

59:50

with Anne Marie Walsh. Steve,

59:52

hello, on LBC.

59:54

Don't you worry about people sort of saying

59:56

guess how much I weigh? You know, when I always think to myself, why would I

59:59

care? I really don't care. Unless it's sort of

1:00:01

something that's going to affect your health. You know,

1:00:03

some people can be very

1:00:06

very healthy because they it might be a a

1:00:09

glammed problem that they might have. You

1:00:11

know, when sort of people put on

1:00:13

weight, everybody does it. but

1:00:15

some people, I've come to conclusion, are

1:00:18

naturally thin. Some people

1:00:19

are naturally skinny. Some people are

1:00:21

naturally thin, and some people are just prone to put on

1:00:23

the weight it turned out. that girl

1:00:25

ages and ages ago. Do you remember she lived upstairs. In

1:00:27

a parent's house, they had to

1:00:29

take away part of the window to

1:00:31

winch her out

1:00:34

because she couldn't get down the stairs. And it turned and

1:00:36

I remember thinking, come, that must be a nightmare to be

1:00:38

that big. And then it turned out

1:00:41

her parents, her friends, they were all ordering

1:00:44

food for her. So she would

1:00:46

have a huge array of food. It would

1:00:48

be like she'd have

1:00:50

Chinese takeaways, She'd have KFC

1:00:52

all in one evening. You know, then for

1:00:54

breakfast, she'd have a huge breakfast in it. That's

1:00:56

why you're the size you are. They do programs

1:00:58

now on America. television, which we get

1:01:00

over here of two doctors. We're very badly

1:01:02

dyed hair, who sort of

1:01:04

have large people coming in, and they say, well, we can

1:01:06

operate, but you need

1:01:08

to a certain amount of weight before we will operate. It's just not

1:01:10

safe. And remember there was

1:01:12

one guy years ago in television. I think he was called

1:01:14

Britain's fatest man

1:01:16

or something. and he thought he weighed sixty stone. So

1:01:18

they weighed him and he didn't weigh sixty stone. He

1:01:20

was nowhere near sixty stone. And he

1:01:22

was really

1:01:24

angry because it took away his little bit of glory. And the bit of glory was I'm

1:01:26

Britain's heaviest man at sixty stone. I thought

1:01:28

you're gonna be Britain's Deaddest man at sixty

1:01:30

stone, if you're not careful. The

1:01:33

pressure on your heart is absolutely

1:01:36

unbelievable. But it was this girl where they had to sort of

1:01:38

dismantle the house, to get

1:01:40

her out into the ambulance. They've now had to get bigger beds in the

1:01:42

ambulances to cater for

1:01:44

some of these

1:01:46

gargantuan people. ridiculous.

1:01:48

Steve, Steve, Steve logged into

1:01:50

the spike, which we like. We like

1:01:52

a lot actually. 84850

1:01:54

that's pretty, isn't it? Where's that? That's

1:01:58

always out of

1:01:59

Vietnam. That's pretty as you know, if you'd show

1:02:02

me that picture though and said, where is that? I'd never have

1:02:04

guessed Vietnam. I really wouldn't I

1:02:06

like cable cars. I've got a thing about cable

1:02:08

cars. I always remember that one with jaws

1:02:11

in

1:02:11

the in the

1:02:13

James Bond film. in

1:02:14

that where he bit through the cable yeah. James Bond's

1:02:16

jaws, and he he bit through the

1:02:18

cable. And they do it up to the

1:02:20

peak railway, I think, now.

1:02:22

Oh, that maybe it's not a cable. It might be a pinion and ratchet kind of

1:02:25

thing, but I love stuff like that. And I've never

1:02:27

done a zip wire. Never been allowed to

1:02:29

do a zip wire. I

1:02:32

haven't done the London. Everybody kept telling me the

1:02:34

London cable car was rubbish and I thought, well, it

1:02:36

looked alright to me. Is it going over the tent?

1:02:38

Have you done it? Oh,

1:02:40

right. What are you asking me for

1:02:42

then?

1:02:43

Yeah. But honestly, you

1:02:45

see, that's what I'm dealing

1:02:47

with. That's why, you know, when they say, what does your

1:02:49

producer do? Give me give me ten bullet

1:02:51

points on that one. I'll write it down. I'll bring it up at

1:02:53

the meeting today. can somebody tell

1:02:55

me what the producers do on the station? Oh,

1:02:58

that's the cable cut. Is that over the

1:03:00

themes? Yes. because there's

1:03:02

the the the tent. I think it looks

1:03:04

quite nice. I think it's

1:03:06

quite I've done the London Eye a couple of

1:03:08

times. That's good. That's nice.

1:03:10

I like that. and I do the one that went

1:03:12

to Wonderland, which goes around a little bit

1:03:14

quicker. And I like anything

1:03:16

like that. I'm not

1:03:18

very

1:03:20

swings went to one of them. No. It's just it's a

1:03:22

big a big wheel, which goes down

1:03:24

very slowly. There's about four of you inside

1:03:26

the the little sort

1:03:28

of cubby

1:03:30

thing. And I quite like that. I like looking over the rooftops of London

1:03:32

because it reminded me of Mary Poppins.

1:03:34

I thought it was good on the

1:03:37

rooftops of London. there are lots of similarities, yeah, between me

1:03:39

and Mary Poppins. I don't think I'd ever be the

1:03:42

Bert character. What do you reckon? So here

1:03:44

is this pensioner. She's facing

1:03:46

a bill. a

1:03:48

legal bill. She's turned half of

1:03:50

a shared driveway into

1:03:52

a potted plant garden.

1:03:54

Retired taxi driver Yvonne Rogers

1:03:58

lost a ten year fight with neighbor,

1:03:59

Janice Wright, who claimed it was difficult

1:04:02

to push her grandchild buggy to

1:04:04

her door. Their homes in Port Chester, in Hans, are

1:04:06

separated by the drive, with each

1:04:08

owning half its wit, but having a right of

1:04:10

way over

1:04:12

it all. Miss Rogers also placed almonds and wheelie bins on

1:04:14

it and let hedges overhang.

1:04:16

She ignored. Oh, here we go. She

1:04:18

ignored a Winchester County Court injunction

1:04:20

to clear

1:04:22

her half and was given a

1:04:24

six month jail term for contempt. Repeating her sentence, miss Rogers, said

1:04:26

she's now selling up Law

1:04:29

justice Stuart Smith suspended the term and will

1:04:32

give a full ruling later, so and her

1:04:34

legal bill to thirty thousand

1:04:36

pounds. You start messing around. Did

1:04:37

you say Rebecca Vardi? I

1:04:39

see I found another piece from Rebecca Vardi, the world's

1:04:42

most boring woman. This is the one who

1:04:44

goes into the high court

1:04:46

and loses and has to pay

1:04:48

over a million and a half pounds. And she's still

1:04:50

droning

1:04:51

on about how hard

1:04:53

done by she feels. And

1:04:56

to be honest with you, nobody's listening. Nobody's listening

1:04:58

at all. And so she's done a

1:05:01

there's a piece in the paper. I think it was only

1:05:03

a short while ago. She did another

1:05:05

piece in the my

1:05:08

eye. Another is how to

1:05:10

book the pages apart. I got open

1:05:12

pages, which is a bit embarrassing, isn't

1:05:14

it really? So she she was complaining about she

1:05:16

treated and how Colleen's

1:05:19

people were a little bit

1:05:21

underhand. And you think, listen, you

1:05:23

were caught out and you had to pay the million

1:05:25

and a half. That's why you had to pay the million and

1:05:27

a half because they found that you'd been

1:05:29

less than truthful And that's, you know, you can't then start that's

1:05:31

the trouble you see because she's not bright. She

1:05:34

thinks you can go on about it and start saying I was

1:05:36

treated badly

1:05:38

in court. I suspect

1:05:40

she needs to be very careful

1:05:42

because

1:05:42

otherwise she'll find herself back in

1:05:44

court again, but of course she'll probably

1:05:46

plead that one. It was just something about

1:05:48

her. I told you before. I I

1:05:50

never liked her. Never liked her. I

1:05:52

don't know why I don't like her. She doesn't come across

1:05:55

very pleasantly. comes across as being one of those, what I

1:05:57

call, Desperados. She'll do anything. And in

1:05:59

fact, the

1:05:59

indicator was that when she got married

1:06:02

to to

1:06:04

her footballing, husband, her parents didn't go to the

1:06:06

wedding. Nobody likes her. She

1:06:07

seems to have sort of very few

1:06:09

fans, very few fans, but I

1:06:11

read this piece In the picture,

1:06:13

actress Anja Taylor Joy. Never

1:06:16

heard of us. She's wearing a very peculiar

1:06:18

outfit. supposed they wear all these outfits,

1:06:20

don't know because they think they look good in

1:06:22

it, but most of the time, they don't. I

1:06:24

can't find Rebecca Vardi. I will find it.

1:06:27

because I remember thinking that, you know,

1:06:29

you really shouldn't start

1:06:32

criticizing the courts and saying, I think they made

1:06:34

a mistake because

1:06:36

very rarely, Does that happen

1:06:38

very rarely, but she

1:06:40

want happy. She was not happy

1:06:42

about it, which is, you know, just one of those things,

1:06:44

isn't it? didn't didn't go your way. You're down a million and a half

1:06:46

quid, and and you didn't

1:06:48

emerge with any any

1:06:50

grace or

1:06:52

reputation, actually. for that matter.

1:06:54

She emerged with absolutely

1:06:56

nothing at all. One of the columnists today talking

1:06:58

about the

1:07:00

chilling element of David Williams' outburst on Britain's got

1:07:02

talent was the apparent

1:07:04

contempt in which this previously exalted

1:07:06

judge evidently held the TV

1:07:08

show's contestants who

1:07:10

have braved barreaking and crippling nerves riding with lucrative

1:07:13

work. Yeah. Yes. I mean, he

1:07:15

did make a mistake. No doubt about

1:07:17

it. He made a big big mistake, I'm afraid, on

1:07:19

that one. Also, TV's Jasmine

1:07:22

inspired by trans tragic Johnny.

1:07:25

This is Jasmine Harmon, shared a sweet message

1:07:28

because Johnny Irwin is

1:07:30

living with terminal cancer. Lovely.

1:07:34

Lovely, man. Lovely, lovely, man.

1:07:36

Morrison's giving shoppers a a feast of

1:07:38

festive discounts, which is

1:07:40

a good idea. They're gonna be competing to get

1:07:42

your money over Christmas. So they're all gonna be banging out stuff probably

1:07:44

as lost leaders, I should

1:07:46

imagine. It's the only way you can actually do

1:07:48

it. I can't find it for Becca Bari thing, which is so

1:07:50

annoying isn't

1:07:52

it. you remember looking at a picture of a thinking, you know, honestly, you are miss misery.

1:07:54

You really are. We can't do

1:07:56

anything about it. I've now decided I

1:07:58

want to do secret santa.

1:08:01

at work. I think that's that's very

1:08:03

much a good idea. And we'll take more

1:08:05

of your text and email to 84850

1:08:08

steve at LBC dot co

1:08:10

dot u k. And my

1:08:12

friend, Chris, has come back and says after

1:08:14

our lunch on Thursday, winter wonderland's open

1:08:17

for a slab evening preview. perhaps best

1:08:19

selling author James O'Brien could get us

1:08:21

in or shouldn't think so. I

1:08:24

don't think so honestly. Have you

1:08:25

seen how big his garage is now stocked

1:08:27

with all his books? never

1:08:29

known anything like it. He's got his books. He's got his board game. And if it's all in

1:08:31

the garage, I hear he's thinking of having a car boot sale that

1:08:33

far been from me to say anything about it.

1:08:36

You know? My

1:08:39

book is still available, so you want to be

1:08:41

a celebrity. Bezos pledges to fight

1:08:43

climate change. Is this the one who's

1:08:45

just given over a hundred million pounds

1:08:47

to dolly parton? He wants to get

1:08:50

he's he's got a hundred billion pounds, so he's gonna find it and give all the money away. And that good.

1:08:52

I mean, it's a limit how much money you

1:08:54

need to live on and obviously doesn't need that

1:08:56

much. And

1:08:58

Bob Gilland's love letters are coming up for Orchard. I

1:09:00

don't know if these are love letters sent to

1:09:02

him or love letters that he's sent,

1:09:05

but they reckon worth

1:09:07

two hundred thousand pounds. He he he

1:09:09

sent them. Did he? Oh, right. Okay. Can't imagine, like, a

1:09:11

role in stone. Yeah. blowing

1:09:15

in the wind. Yes. Alright, dear. Very nice indeed.

1:09:17

Thank you. You know. And what else

1:09:19

did he do? I can't

1:09:22

remember. Bob Dillon. He was some he

1:09:24

was the one who couldn't sing on. We

1:09:26

are the world. Wasn't he? We are the world. We are the children. But he he had a load

1:09:29

of hit single hit

1:09:31

single. So he was I'm

1:09:34

trying to find all his hits now. End of the line, I don't remember. That was traveling Wilburitz. Oh, hey, mister Tambourine

1:09:36

man, play a

1:09:39

song for me. just

1:09:42

like a

1:09:43

woman? Yeah.

1:09:45

I've I've just

1:09:47

done mister Tambourine

1:09:49

man. guy

1:09:49

a little bit slow to the party,

1:09:52

I think, today, a little bit slow. I don't

1:09:54

remember one more cup of coffee or then my

1:09:56

favorite Lei

1:09:58

Lei Lei. Also, that was quite good. Isn't it? A very good impression actually there. Plus,

1:10:00

knock knock

1:10:02

knocking on heaven's door. hurricane.

1:10:07

Remember hurricane? It was

1:10:08

about a boxer called hurricane

1:10:10

somebody. It's all I remember. I

1:10:13

don't know. I really don't know.

1:10:15

I remember some of the other ones that are gonna go down a little

1:10:18

list a bit further. Things that oh, the and

1:10:20

the times they

1:10:23

are a change in It's

1:10:25

almost uncanny. It's almost like he was here in the studio with me. One of those,

1:10:27

I know you look around and you go, where is he?

1:10:29

Surely these voices

1:10:32

do not all emanate from

1:10:34

one person. Yes, they do. Yes, they do. I love it. I also

1:10:36

got a very good

1:10:38

impression as nobody else does.

1:10:41

They say all your

1:10:43

impressions sound like Steve

1:10:45

Allen. Steve Allen

1:10:45

on LVC, text 84850

1:10:51

Morning. Nice to be company. It's

1:10:51

Steve Valens. Early breakfast on

1:10:54

LVC, Tuesday, November the

1:10:56

fifteenth, which is lovely. I'll

1:10:58

say that the bus retailer Jules

1:11:00

Now I have to be honest, I've never

1:11:02

heard of them before, but then I haven't heard of after the high street. They've just blown

1:11:05

twenty million pounds on

1:11:07

a new head office less

1:11:10

than a year before it ran out of cash

1:11:12

and has now put sixteen hundred

1:11:14

jobs at risk. And so consequently,

1:11:17

the country inspired fashion brand They've got a hundred

1:11:19

and thirty two shops. They confirmed that they're

1:11:21

calling in administrators from

1:11:23

Interpath after talks

1:11:26

to rescue the business. collapsed. It's been a rapid downfall

1:11:28

for the retailer. And

1:11:30

it's it's just ridiculous.

1:11:33

I mean, about sixteen hundred

1:11:35

people can lose their jobs coming up to Christmas. Out of all the

1:11:37

the times that you don't want

1:11:39

to lose

1:11:40

your job, it

1:11:42

would be a case of

1:11:45

sort of Christmas would be a bad

1:11:47

time. Don't you think so? I think so

1:11:50

as well. And well done to my brother's

1:11:52

daughter. She's just won a

1:11:54

top wedding award. She's one of the top wedding photographers

1:11:56

in Wales, and

1:11:59

she

1:11:59

was presented with her

1:12:02

award by, none other than David Emmanuel. David Emmanuel, and and

1:12:05

My

1:12:08

my brother then said I spoke to him afterwards and said

1:12:10

I'm Steve Allen's brother. And he said he loves your show and you wake him up

1:12:12

every morning at four:zero a.

1:12:14

m. So he says hello. which

1:12:17

is very nice. We love David Emmanuel and

1:12:19

well done to Tasha because, I mean, I told you the other

1:12:21

day

1:12:21

she's really busy

1:12:24

with weddings. And it's not

1:12:26

something we ever thought she was gonna go into, but she's very successful at it.

1:12:28

In fact, she was

1:12:31

she was so privileged was

1:12:33

even allowed to photograph my

1:12:35

brother's wedding. So she goes there, yes, he's And otherwise, that

1:12:38

would be very complicated. but

1:12:42

it's a case if she goes to the venue, she looks it, she

1:12:44

looks at all the sites for the photographs and everything else

1:12:46

like that. She does her research and it

1:12:49

pays off. and

1:12:49

show she's a very successful wedding photographer, which is lovely because her sister

1:12:52

is getting

1:12:55

married next year. I

1:12:58

don't know whether or not Tasha is gonna be doing the the wedding pictures. Wouldn't me. She seems to be so

1:13:04

busy. so busy. because he might

1:13:06

find this Rebecca Vardi picture. Oh, Rob Stewart, by the way, says he will continue to sing about sex

1:13:08

because people love it.

1:13:10

I don't know. I listen.

1:13:14

I wasn't a survey. Was anybody else surveyed

1:13:16

about Rod Stewart's saying, well, he but

1:13:18

he's it's sort of his singing.

1:13:20

If you want my body and you

1:13:22

think I'm saying, see. I mean, now. In seventy two,

1:13:25

it's a bit a bit itchy. And you

1:13:27

know half of Brits are

1:13:29

wearing their coats

1:13:32

indoors just save on heating bills. Are

1:13:34

you wearing your coat indoors? Are you wearing coat indoors?

1:13:36

Yeah. sometimes.

1:13:39

That's interesting, isn't it? And what else do we have?

1:13:41

What else do we have? Loads of other people?

1:13:43

Mayor JAMA can't stop

1:13:45

dumping into our ex. don't know what she does. I have no

1:13:48

idea, but I'm sure she's very

1:13:50

good at it. Johnny and his

1:13:52

cancer, Hel, Peter Croutch,

1:13:54

signing up with Paul Poatz, and

1:13:56

a twenty piece orchestra. They want

1:13:58

a Christmas number one. And it's it's

1:14:01

a classic album

1:14:03

of Terrace, Chance. Terry's

1:14:05

chance. Scarlet Moffett, a scared a demon will possess her. Yeah. Whatever do.

1:14:08

Whatever. He must have run out of

1:14:10

stories to sell now. The I'm a celebrity

1:14:12

winner apparently

1:14:15

sleeps with holy water and the bible next to her

1:14:17

bed because she feared being taken over by an

1:14:20

evil entity. Yeah.

1:14:23

Right. Whatever. Where do they get

1:14:25

them from? Where do they get these

1:14:27

people from? Tyson Furey says

1:14:29

fish fingers, chips, and beans. It's a

1:14:31

secret to his success, really. You're more mad

1:14:33

than I thought you were. It's

1:14:35

not chips and beans. Although

1:14:37

I I quite like the meal, meal is

1:14:39

is very appealing. And we've still got time to

1:14:42

pick a winner for the great British

1:14:46

Bake Off. I don't know why. I mean, they they've got 1233

1:14:49

people and four people judging. Why

1:14:51

it needs four people to present

1:14:53

that program? I've got no idea,

1:14:55

but apparently, they do. they do. And there's

1:14:57

one

1:14:57

here. I don't understand this one. This

1:14:59

is a it's

1:15:02

called the great Christmas cash giveaway. It's a full page advert.

1:15:04

Full page advert. And they

1:15:06

say we're giving away five thousand

1:15:08

pounds in tax free cash. The good

1:15:10

news is it's free to enter plus

1:15:13

all the winners will get their cash prize

1:15:16

in time to spend on a great Christmas. And so you're

1:15:18

entered into the cash draw and you have to be over

1:15:20

eighteen and

1:15:22

there is no personal information sold

1:15:24

onto third parties. I don't quite understand how

1:15:26

they make money out of this. I

1:15:29

can't understand they're giving away five

1:15:31

thousand pounds. Well, I don't know. I

1:15:32

don't know. It says

1:15:34

sponsored by Puzzle

1:15:35

Digest, and they're giving away

1:15:37

five thousand pounds. They've got ninety

1:15:40

nine cash prices to

1:15:42

be one. Oh, totaling five thousand pounds. One lucky entry will be selected for each cash prize from

1:15:44

twenty

1:15:48

five quid all the way up to a

1:15:50

massive thousand pounds, but they say you've got to be in it to win it. And you send your details off.

1:15:52

So first name, surname, address,

1:15:54

date of

1:15:54

birth, telephone number, post code.

1:15:58

They're compiling

1:15:59

a

1:15:59

database. They've got to be I don't know

1:16:02

how they can give away five thousand money cash

1:16:05

and pay for this advertisement in the

1:16:07

paper. Very odd, isn't

1:16:07

it? I never understand these things. I never understand how

1:16:09

they all work. Here we go. My

1:16:11

my pie sees today in the paper. I

1:16:13

have to tell people why we need to

1:16:15

do pie sees. from Russell Grant.

1:16:17

It says be careful of who you trust and how much you reveal

1:16:19

to others. Yeah. If you say the

1:16:22

wrong thing to someone who is

1:16:24

being argumentative. They're

1:16:26

likely to start a rumor that damages your reputation. Bring talks to a polite close and

1:16:32

walk away.

1:16:33

I don't know if

1:16:34

that does that apply to everybody? Does

1:16:36

that apply to apply to it would

1:16:38

apply to you definitely Elliott. What's

1:16:41

signing you down? Just a matter of interest.

1:16:43

Your Your capricorn no. Capricorn says

1:16:45

step back from an argument

1:16:47

with a competitor. Have you

1:16:49

had

1:16:50

an argument with a

1:16:52

competitor? It

1:16:52

says take a look at

1:16:55

the situation from a different perspective. You can face opponents and win.

1:16:58

oh,

1:17:00

he likes arguing. Oh, there you go then. Well,

1:17:02

this I could do nothing about this I could do nothing about if people

1:17:06

like arguing. those people like Calgary, don't they? Because they sort of it's I

1:17:09

mean, I'm I'm quite like a good argument myself, especially after

1:17:11

a bottle of Prosecco. I think

1:17:13

it's very interesting. Rita Orritt turned

1:17:16

a pop awards seminar into a fashion show. She wore

1:17:18

ten outfits in one evening. I feel a bit sorry

1:17:20

for her. I don't think she knows who

1:17:22

she is. She just wears all these different outfits, and I'm not

1:17:24

really sure, you know, whether or not it's the

1:17:26

right way

1:17:26

for, but it gets to the

1:17:29

publicity. I

1:17:30

suppose, and that's what it's all about.

1:17:32

Charles' law has changed, so Harry and Andrew could

1:17:33

be sidelined. There's know what you know, you're not

1:17:36

gonna mess around

1:17:38

with prince Charles. King Charles. So

1:17:40

I just think he's king prince Charles.

1:17:43

I don't know why. And Mike

1:17:46

Tyndall was wearing his budgy smugglers. I

1:17:48

mean, really, honestly, a bit sad, no

1:17:51

matter that age. And boy

1:17:53

George tells the truth about his

1:17:55

hair transplant. because he's had a hair And then they've got jungle,

1:17:57

confidential, over the podcast running with one

1:17:59

of them issues. Rebecca

1:18:02

Vardi, I was framed. You really are

1:18:04

dreary, aren't you love? You really are very dreary. She

1:18:07

still claims innocence in a new documentary months

1:18:09

after losing the wack

1:18:11

of the trial. You better learn actually

1:18:13

love. There's laws in this country. You start making claims like this, and you

1:18:15

might find yourself on the

1:18:19

receiving end again. In a

1:18:20

friend of missus Rooney said the court ruling was absolutely clear

1:18:22

about the facts of this case and also about the nature of the

1:18:25

evidence missus Vardy gave.

1:18:27

Yeah. She's deeply unpleasant. Deeply

1:18:30

unpleasant. So desperate, so desperate, believes she's I think she's paid the million and a half over.

1:18:36

I bet I should imagine

1:18:38

the husband had something to say about it. Do you know that Bono's going on tour? He's got a new one man which

1:18:43

was surprising humility. he explores

1:18:45

the tragedies that shaped him. And as one writer in

1:18:47

the mail today says, if Bono

1:18:50

still hasn't found what he's looking

1:18:52

for, what

1:18:54

chance for the rest of us? Yeah.

1:18:56

I think so as well. You know, people like

1:18:58

that can't cope with it. I remember when he walked

1:19:00

through this building years ago, he walked through our

1:19:02

floor. He was obviously into RadioX, I think who used to be down

1:19:05

in other studios. And he was wearing

1:19:07

those orange glasses with lenses

1:19:09

in, must make it really bizarre when you're out on

1:19:12

the streets. Everything is bathed in this sort of

1:19:14

orange light. And I was also I was

1:19:16

I was drawn to the fact that it wasn't

1:19:18

pretty tall either. but it was still bono, and you still looked. You

1:19:20

couldn't help looking at him because he sort of he

1:19:22

had that that sort of aura about him. Derek

1:19:26

Evans, his birthday today. Many happy Derek Evans, many happy returns

1:19:28

a day. Who's Derek Evans? You don't know who

1:19:30

Derek Evans is? I'll give you a clue.

1:19:36

A

1:19:37

cheerleader or called Derek. I don't

1:19:39

think so. He's

1:19:39

seventy.

1:19:42

He's mister Motivator. You've

1:19:45

heard him mister Motivator?

1:19:47

Oh, that's good. That's good. And he found fame on

1:19:51

GMTV. Lovely.

1:19:53

He says, I used to add a a coordinated bum bag. So

1:19:55

I had somebody to hide my microphone because

1:19:58

he used to wear this all one

1:19:59

was not really places to put it.

1:20:02

Also Peter Philips, Princess Anne's son was

1:20:04

described as the late

1:20:06

Queen's favorite grandson. They say that,

1:20:08

don't they? You could say anything you like the Queen's

1:20:10

not with us anymore. When he was born, fifth in line to the throne of forty one gun salute was

1:20:13

fired from the

1:20:15

tower of London, over his mother rejected titles

1:20:17

for Philip and his sister, Zara. In twenty twenty, billed as a

1:20:19

British royal family

1:20:22

member he appeared in a Chinese advert for Jersey milk. I remember it

1:20:25

very well indeed. They would have to sell themselves

1:20:27

down the river, don't they? RichemontON was

1:20:29

born on this day

1:20:31

in eighteen ninety. on rich male crumpton. Oh, it's hopeless.

1:20:33

What is the matter with you? Why you don't you don't know

1:20:36

who rich

1:20:38

male crumpton is? Richmond Crumpton wrote the

1:20:40

Just William books. Oh, see,

1:20:43

you like those

1:20:44

books? I like

1:20:45

those books, you guys. I

1:20:47

like those books, Stephen. I really

1:20:49

do. They're my favorite books. I have them in my library at

1:20:51

home, and because we live in a castle. And and it's my favorite books,

1:20:53

but I had no idea who

1:20:55

the author was. isn't

1:20:58

it fabulous? I now know. That's

1:21:00

a middle class education for you. Also, on November the fifteenth

1:21:02

nineteen sixty nine, the BBC launched a full color service

1:21:07

with an evening with Patula featuring the singer at the rollout

1:21:09

at all. One of our most successful singers,

1:21:12

Patula Clarke, one

1:21:14

of our most successful singers, She

1:21:16

was she's had more hits than anybody else

1:21:18

because it came up on the chase the other day. And I knew it was Prashula Clark, straight away,

1:21:21

who's been the

1:21:23

most successful singer. and I'm shouting at

1:21:25

the television. It's Petula clark and Yeah. because I know these

1:21:28

things. Why? Because I have

1:21:30

a memory that retains the most

1:21:32

bizarre bits

1:21:35

of information. You know,

1:21:36

I can't remember sometimes who I am. I can't remember

1:21:38

what I did here to help. Just to know,iri

1:21:41

at apple dot com. Shut up.

1:21:43

Shut up. Shut up now. I

1:21:44

think things come to life, honestly. I'm totally convinced

1:21:46

it records me when I'm asleep. I do worry about stuff like that.

1:21:48

You think to yourself, how

1:21:50

much does it know about me?

1:21:52

You know, can it film

1:21:54

me secretly? Can it? Wow. That'd be

1:21:57

cool

1:21:58

and let

1:21:59

you imagine. whether to see yourself what you

1:22:02

look like on to or know

1:22:04

what to look like on television. Leading Britain's

1:22:06

conversation, LBC, with Steve Allen. Molding

1:22:08

nice to

1:22:09

company. Welcome to I

1:22:11

can't believe it's Tuesday. I can't believe it's

1:22:13

Tuesday. The lights are up everywhere. I

1:22:15

think most people have got their Christmas lights

1:22:17

up, and most of them are lit

1:22:19

except this morning, Harrods didn't have them lit. Whether there's a specific

1:22:21

day they're gonna put them on, we've

1:22:23

got our lights up

1:22:25

on lamppost. They're not

1:22:28

lit yet. And, oh, that's what I gotta do

1:22:30

today. I knew there was something I had to do today. I'm gonna go and drop some light soft at Paul Cooper's

1:22:32

because he's doing my trees.

1:22:34

I think they're doing them tomorrow.

1:22:38

I'm pretty certain. So

1:22:40

gotta pay for those. And then everything's

1:22:42

gone up this year. Christmas trees are

1:22:44

up in price. Everything's gone up

1:22:47

in price. very disappointing. There's a a good feature

1:22:49

today in the mail, which is

1:22:51

very important because many of

1:22:53

you will be affected

1:22:56

by this. And it's the story about a third

1:22:58

of independent chemists. Many of them family run businesses

1:23:00

are at risk of

1:23:03

closing within two years So they

1:23:05

may have launched a campaign to

1:23:07

save local pharmacies because I only use local pharmacies. I wouldn't dream

1:23:10

of using, you know, a

1:23:13

big chain like boots or anything like that. I just wouldn't. I'd I'd rather use

1:23:15

a local pharmacy, which is far more

1:23:18

in touch with the local

1:23:20

community. And

1:23:22

in mind, they sell everything apart

1:23:25

from they got they're a very

1:23:27

busy pharmacy. Very busy pharmacy. They

1:23:29

do deodorants and shower gel. They do everything. I mean, it's just it's the whole

1:23:31

gamut. You know, those pharmacies you see Isabelle go with the big bottles

1:23:33

with the colored water inside in the

1:23:35

windows like that. and

1:23:39

it's it's very good. Very very good. And they

1:23:42

look after you because they are

1:23:45

the people who can you know, they they make

1:23:47

up my prescription. They put it all in the little

1:23:49

boxes. So I just have to sort of open

1:23:51

up the box and take

1:23:53

the tablets out for that particular moment. It's all very good. It's all very

1:23:55

good, and I like it a lot.

1:23:58

And I've been with them for

1:23:59

ages, ages

1:24:02

and ages and ages. and I just liked them because I

1:24:04

thought that they were they were more interested. I

1:24:06

think if you go to for me, if

1:24:08

I go to somewhere like boots, I

1:24:10

get the feeling that I'm just They

1:24:12

don't really that doesn't matter to them at all. You just sort

1:24:14

of a means to an end, whereas I think it there's so many people that work

1:24:17

in my chemist

1:24:20

in goods. They're like a family. So I

1:24:22

always take them in tens of chocolates at Christmas and stuff like that.

1:24:24

Oh, yeah. Why not? I take them

1:24:26

into the into the doctor's surgery as well.

1:24:30

probably the wrong thing to take in. Isn't it when you think about

1:24:32

it? Loads of sugary sweets. But I I

1:24:34

always get a big box of or

1:24:36

a big tin of quality street so they could

1:24:38

have things like that. because it's, you know, I mean, every year, all people

1:24:41

are struggling. Well, if if they've

1:24:43

now said, you know, family run

1:24:45

businesses at risk of closing

1:24:47

within two years. They say that

1:24:49

we can't manage the demand because if you're just a little one man

1:24:51

band, you're constantly making up

1:24:53

prescriptions and all the rest

1:24:56

of it. Whereas

1:24:58

I think working in the prescription side mister Charles Place, I think about 123

1:25:01

Probably about five

1:25:04

of them. working in

1:25:06

just that bit, two on the tilts, there'd be one other person doing other bits and pieces. So it's it's fairly fairly

1:25:08

busy. In fact, it's

1:25:11

probably very busy. But I

1:25:15

was checking with him on how much his electric's gone up and

1:25:17

that's gone up quite considerably because all

1:25:19

these places have got to

1:25:21

have everything and they do the flu job.

1:25:23

and they do all these other bits and pieces. We had sort of the COVID

1:25:25

jabs on offer. because if you haven't had

1:25:27

these you really should get

1:25:30

these things. If they're available to

1:25:32

you, if you're over a certain age,

1:25:34

go for it. Absolutely go for it, you know, because I think it's

1:25:36

I think it's, you know,

1:25:38

it it's well worth it.

1:25:41

There's a guy here who's been affected by

1:25:43

an aggressive tumor. And he was

1:25:45

a super fit cyclist because

1:25:48

most cyclists are

1:25:51

fairly fit. We see them around our way. They're from Kingstern. They

1:25:53

come from Richmond. They're all over the place and

1:25:55

they're very, very fit.

1:25:57

He went from being a superfit cyclist to being

1:25:59

paralyzed by brain cancer

1:26:02

in five months. Literally,

1:26:04

these where these illnesses

1:26:06

come from, I've got no idea.

1:26:08

He said it's not great for me at

1:26:10

sixty one, but imagine if you're twenty eight, and you just had your first baby, he said people had

1:26:13

given this this

1:26:16

death sentence. It's very difficult. I hate

1:26:18

to bring it back to Johnny Irwin again, but I mean he's a young man, a very very young man,

1:26:20

and he's come down with with cancer.

1:26:22

He only knew because he was on holiday

1:26:26

or filming. I think I can't remember. And

1:26:29

and his vision went

1:26:31

blurred. Now, you know, if you're

1:26:34

a diabetic, That's an occupational hazard anyway, so they

1:26:36

make sure that you get your eyes

1:26:38

tested as often as possible. But

1:26:40

he he went to hospital And they

1:26:42

said you've got cancer. And they

1:26:44

said it's

1:26:45

it's fairly aggressive and it's spreading. And

1:26:47

so it's now spread

1:26:48

to his brain. Now how that affects

1:26:50

him? I do not know. but at least people are talking about and at

1:26:52

least he's very he seems to be

1:26:54

very upbeat. But I think secretly inside,

1:26:58

he's gonna be exactly the same as everybody else. It's

1:27:00

frightening. It's frightening. But as

1:27:03

he said yesterday, he

1:27:05

said, I'm not dying of cancer. I'm

1:27:08

living with cancer. And that's what he's done. And

1:27:10

when you see the picture in Hello Magazine that

1:27:13

him and his kids, they're gorgeous. But they won't

1:27:15

know if he's only got three months left. We don't

1:27:17

know. He doesn't know either. You know, they

1:27:20

won't know who their

1:27:22

daddy was because kids just

1:27:24

forget because that won't be in their

1:27:26

brain. They know who daddy is at the moment, but if daddy isn't there, mommy

1:27:28

will have to say he's

1:27:30

up there. He's that star. That's

1:27:33

steady. That's daddy up there. And it's very difficult. So that's what he wants to do. He

1:27:35

wants to sort of, you know, make sure

1:27:37

people are well aware

1:27:40

of it. But the

1:27:42

one thing he thought was very,

1:27:44

very important is to is to take out in

1:27:46

short. And we got anymore text and emails.

1:27:50

I'm not getting anything through. What

1:27:52

do I? Yeah. Wait a minute.

1:27:55

Am I doing it properly? Yeah.

1:27:58

That's all. What was that?

1:27:59

I kept looking at the same one saying, looking

1:28:02

forward to a good show. That's the last one

1:28:04

I've got on here. And I said, no. I

1:28:06

said it's 406 Did you see I'm a celebrity last

1:28:08

night? I didn't, actually.

1:28:11

And Mike Tyndall explaining he

1:28:13

was at a seventies disco and

1:28:15

he bent over his trousers to

1:28:18

expose his pants that read well anyway. It was in front of Princess Anne, but

1:28:20

listen, I always assume that any

1:28:22

member to the royal family, like

1:28:26

Prince's Annual Charles, there's a rude side to

1:28:28

them. Well, we know because we've seen

1:28:30

the phone conversations, have we not between

1:28:33

Prince Charles? and Camilla. And

1:28:36

those we can't repeat

1:28:39

either to you. Steve, do

1:28:42

you feel that people are sending less Christmas

1:28:44

cards? I do. Yes. Stella. I feel like putting my wreath up now,

1:28:46

but I think it's too early. Yes. Since never too early.

1:28:51

never too early, seriously. I love it. And and Louis

1:28:53

says, Steve, you watched the chase

1:28:55

too? I assume to be either reading the

1:28:57

papers or be in bed because you're up

1:29:00

all night. I No. I mean,

1:29:02

I I go to bed quite quite early.

1:29:05

I like going to bed. It's

1:29:07

a bit old. But today we got a meeting, so I won't

1:29:09

get home to date till about one o'clock. Then I'll

1:29:11

go and drop some lights

1:29:14

off at Paul, Paul Cooper's. and

1:29:16

and then then I will be

1:29:18

in bed and sleep immediately. It

1:29:22

literally takes me but

1:29:24

seconds to go to sleep. I know it's really

1:29:26

annoying for those people who find it a bit difficult. Leanne says the song Hurricane was about the true story of

1:29:28

a box called Ruben Hurricane

1:29:30

Carter, wrongfully imprisoned for murder. who's

1:29:34

put in prison for nearly two decades. Dental Washington portrayed

1:29:36

him in the film. I knew it was a

1:29:38

I knew it was a boxer. That's all

1:29:40

I knew. I couldn't remember which one

1:29:43

it was, the hurricane. He was he was

1:29:45

called. So that was dental, Washington. Interesting. Thank you

1:29:47

for the information, the informats, C0N

1:29:51

Also, when I Are

1:29:54

you shedding light, sir Sean,

1:29:56

on Jeff Bezos, where he's just been the

1:29:58

news about mistreating his

1:29:59

workers? No. He's just given hundred

1:30:02

million pounds generally part. And that was

1:30:04

the only bit that's being concentrated on at the moment. Jenny

1:30:06

says you are a Mary Quipper and give priceless innuendo.

1:30:10

I certainly do not. I'm

1:30:12

astonished that you would say anything

1:30:14

like that. David says apparently lots

1:30:17

of crematoriums can't cope with the increasing size of coffins,

1:30:19

which have to be sent many miles away to specialist ones often without

1:30:23

the family's knowledge. Well, once the

1:30:26

you've lost the coffin in the crematorium, you don't really know whether it's going to be cremated there. I

1:30:28

went to a funeral

1:30:31

couple of years back. and

1:30:33

in fact, they were so busy. They couldn't cremate people straight

1:30:35

away. So there was a there was a backlog, you know.

1:30:37

There's only I think they only

1:30:39

had three ovens. or

1:30:43

something. And so that

1:30:45

was a bit

1:30:48

difficult. Steve, I'm sure I

1:30:50

went on a cable car in when

1:30:52

we holiday the the big district. But I'm not a

1:30:54

hundred percent sure if it was indeed Matt Loke. Somewhere in the beautiful big

1:30:58

district, Steve. says Kim. Jason, the post

1:31:00

Stees, says I see where the spoons have converted

1:31:02

a church to a pub in the

1:31:05

Isle of White. yeah, that's what they do. They

1:31:07

take play theaters. Some of their some of their

1:31:09

ones are fabulous. I've seen the the man in

1:31:11

the moon, Newport.

1:31:12

newport But

1:31:13

have you seen some

1:31:15

of them which are in theaters?

1:31:18

They've taken old theaters and they've converted them

1:31:20

inside to

1:31:22

pubs. They're absolutely amazing

1:31:24

places. Absolutely amazing places. I

1:31:26

couldn't I couldn't be more

1:31:29

impressed by anything. if you patted me

1:31:31

on the bottom and called me Doris, I seriously

1:31:33

I mean, they just look absolutely

1:31:36

wonderful, and I'm not even

1:31:38

a pub person. I'm not I haven't been drinking in

1:31:40

a pub for a long long time.

1:31:42

Objectifying the prices. I'm a bit mean.

1:31:44

I'm afraid when it comes to that. Apparently,

1:31:46

only five minutes away from our ice

1:31:48

cream from ice cream, Iain, this morning. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Would

1:31:51

you love to you? Yeah. Yeah. And we take more of your Texan emails

1:31:53