0:01

This is LVC from

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Global, leading Britain's conversation

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with Steve Huddl. Morning

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everybody, Tuesday, December the sixth.

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It's Steve Allen's early breakfast on LBC

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with you till seven. I trust you

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are well and pollocks.

0:23

Everybody had a little pollocks

0:25

toy theater. You could spend a small fortune and

0:27

be going to museum in Covent Garden. And

0:29

they were lovely. Very thick Toriano. Very

0:31

thick Toriano. But, yeah, it was maybe his husband,

0:34

Derek, who in real life, owned Pollux's

0:36

toy museum. And I saw him in there

0:38

couple of times. He used to say hello, but I think he said

0:40

hello to everybody, which was quite nice. The

0:43

Sussex, the lies, and the video tape

0:45

I mean, really, they've turned in the most dreary

0:47

boring couple. Haven't they? Poor old Harry. He

0:49

must be so lonely and likely

0:51

to get worse I suspect and then Rahim,

0:54

who says I won't go back to Qatar until my

0:56

family is safe because that was a story

0:58

blown up of all proportion yesterday

1:00

when they said know, the family were held up by

1:02

armed raiders, a load of old cobblers. It wasn't

1:04

that at all. The family weren't even

1:07

in the house. But as I've always said

1:09

about footballers, if you're that stupid, that

1:11

you'd tell people that you've got three hundred thousand

1:13

pounds worth of watches and all rest of it. Somebody's

1:15

gonna take it from you, and me it can't

1:17

goes walking through shortage. with a

1:19

like hundred thousand pound watch on his wrist. And

1:21

you think to yourself, are you mad or what?

1:23

The answer is yes. Yes. You

1:25

don't go walking around with a watch like that.

1:27

There's people who can spot the fake and the real

1:29

ones and they go rather than that. It's easy.

1:32

Give it to me. The amount of people, the amount

1:34

of stories I've done over the years people

1:36

who've gone out to bar or something like that and

1:38

somebody's seen that they've got a Rolex on.

1:40

And you think, I'm gonna have that and they just take it

1:42

off and, you know, it's it's really

1:45

quite bad actually. The Arctic blast

1:47

which is approaching according to officials. And

1:49

it is cold out there this morning. So

1:52

put a put a jumper on. Put

1:54

a, you know, thermal pants on and all the rest

1:56

of it. I like the story which is in all the papers

1:58

this morning. It's about a millionaire author.

2:00

He's very, very successful. And

2:03

there's a family who, I think,

2:05

either rental, they farm on bits of his land

2:07

and all the rest of it. Anyway, they made

2:10

libelous statements about him.

2:12

and he took him to court and he's won

2:15

because they're revolting family. I tell you they are.

2:17

It's not it's not just, you know, it's mom,

2:19

dad, and the daughter. They

2:22

all made claims against it literally the

2:24

whole family and they've lost

2:26

in court because as I'll

2:28

probably say on my free little lecture podcast,

2:30

you cannot make claims about somebody unless

2:33

you can substantiate them. If you

2:35

can't substantiate, they're gonna take you to court, you're

2:37

gonna lose, and you have to pay their damages as

2:39

well. and their legal bills, which I think in this

2:41

case, amounts about a hundred thousand pounds.

2:43

You know, that'll teach them family,

2:45

absolutely revolting. Robbie Williams to

2:47

headline a live entertainment event at Sandringham.

2:50

A little bit excited he'll be

2:52

mime singing. The crowd will be singing

2:54

along to all his hits because he doesn't really sing any

2:56

or does he? He sort of he just sort of goes

2:58

there. He does private parties now for a million

3:00

quidion get Robbie Williams to turn up.

3:02

But he's he wants to put in a

3:04

fence. at the moment, it is Kensington

3:07

Mansion because he doesn't want

3:09

people looking into his garden, which

3:11

is a bit embarrassing. And would you buy a house there? Or what

3:13

do you just buy a house in the middle of nowhere? and

3:15

then go and live there and, you know, have have your dogs

3:17

and all that. It's just ridiculous. You move into

3:19

the middle of Ken high street and you go, oh, I don't

3:21

want people looking at my garden, your dreary

3:23

old baggage. Goodness sake. wants

3:25

to put up a two million pound fence. I'm

3:27

assuming it'll have the towers and the guard

3:29

dogs and the search lights and all the rest of

3:31

it. I don't think of anything else. the

3:34

union, little Michael, and

3:36

his his rail strikers, because

3:39

we knew that they weren't gonna get what they wanted, so

3:41

because they all want Christmas off. so

3:43

they've they've decided that they're going to add extra

3:45

days just to affect the Christmas travel,

3:47

like it's harmful. Like it's harmful. Why

3:49

should we have to suffer from it? Well, nothing

3:51

to do with it because they they couldn't give us stuff

3:54

about you. They really couldn't care less.

3:56

They're not interested. They're interested in themselves.

3:58

And if if you suffer at that time, and

4:00

all the people who've got businesses at the station.

4:02

Well, that's just tough. That's just tough

4:04

till they get what they want. Somebody wrote to me,

4:06

there are they're a train driver and they've

4:08

sort of mapped it all out. I quite understand what it

4:10

is. I quite understand the idea of

4:12

asking for more money. I quite understand this.

4:15

and for the nurses and post office workers and

4:17

people, I understand it. But why should we

4:19

have to suffer? Why should

4:21

we have to suffer? You know, I

4:23

don't understand nothing do with me.

4:25

And yet, you know, over Christmas, they basically

4:27

screwed Christmas for a load of people. Old Mick

4:29

will be out there in a bit of a time when he

4:31

It'll be out there for standing on the picket

4:33

lines, on the breezy, on Christmas. I can see the

4:35

pictures now. Here he is, he's mad at the Pete

4:37

Wall. So I called himself Mick as opposed

4:39

to Michael, because he's like, you

4:41

know, he's Michael. He's not Mick

4:43

at all. It's just it's like I'm not

4:45

really Steve. I'm Stephen. and

4:47

Lorraine Kelly isn't Lorraine Kelly as

4:49

we now know. But it's it's a case that there

4:51

will be picture of standing out there on Christmas day

4:53

because our members don't get any money. He's on

4:55

a small fortune. He's on a small

4:57

fortune, but that's why he couldn't care less. They

4:59

could literally throw it out every time the rail

5:01

company come back and go, we offered this and that no. We

5:03

don't want that. Now we've added extra

5:05

days. So I think from about the twenty six,

5:08

twenty seven, I mean, what it is, actually, now they're

5:10

taking more strike days as you will

5:12

discover. I'll give you all the dates this morning. The good

5:14

news is Richard Osman has got married.

5:16

Well done Richard, he is enormous.

5:19

He is tall tall, but

5:21

he's got himself married. So that's very

5:23

nice indeed. Just before Christmas, how exciting.

5:26

I love it. Boris Becker,

5:28

once he served his his time,

5:31

is gonna be deported, couldn't

5:33

care less. Railwork

5:35

has now gone straight from Christmas Eve

5:37

until the twenty seventh of December.

5:39

Such from six PM on Christmas

5:41

Eve, just when you all wanna go home and see your

5:43

family, solve you for soldiers that he didn't

5:45

care about you, Oh, little Michael.

5:48

He's out there. Yeah. Yeah. I get the old boys

5:50

here. And that kind of stuff. And

5:52

so it will curtail some of the last passenger

5:54

trains. Most trains don't run on the twenty

5:56

fifth or twenty sixth of December. But

5:58

so it's gonna be Christmas Eve,

6:01

which is the twenty fourth until the twenty

6:03

seventh. So six PM of course, all the trains have been the

6:05

wrong area. He didn't care. Look at

6:07

him wearing his flashy suit and his little is

6:09

a very expensive tie. No.

6:11

Michael Lynch, RMT General

6:13

Secretaryals, we prefer to call it, the Grinch.

6:16

The man who's gonna screw up your

6:18

Christmas whether you like it or not. find

6:20

you there's another thing to could scrub Christmas apparently.

6:22

If you get boost up at the firm's Christmas

6:24

party, there's a very good chance you could be

6:26

fired. because I thought

6:28

everybody got drunk at Christmas parties. I

6:30

mean, I I don't because I

6:32

don't do Christmas parties. I'm not really a Christmas

6:35

party, but have done Christmas parties in the

6:37

past, but to be honest with you, it's a complete and

6:39

utter waste of time for me. It

6:41

just it just doesn't do it for me. I'd rather go out

6:43

for for dinner or for lunch you with sort

6:45

of friends and sort of, you know, be half a dozen

6:47

of you having a having a nice time as opposed to

6:49

standing the corner. What? Yeah. I

6:51

know I know. Can I get a drink

6:54

You end up doing Sema four to the person

6:56

standing behind the bar because they they can't hear you

6:58

either, which is embarrassing.

7:02

Matt Goss is apparently dragging out his last

7:04

five seconds of fame. He's going to

7:06

be an actor. He's got the lead role

7:08

in a movie. I mean, honestly, it must be somebody who's

7:10

willing to throw their money away. Apparently,

7:12

it's a really meaty part and Matt

7:14

can get himself into it. Why don't we be taking the

7:16

hair off and putting different hair on for it?

7:18

because he's got no acting experience unless you

7:20

call I mean, because he can't dance. We

7:23

know that because we saw him attempting to do it and

7:25

it just looked embarrassing. So he's I mean, he's

7:27

trying everything. He's trying

7:29

everything, and he's gonna come back and live

7:31

here. I thought he'd already got rid of the house in

7:33

America, but apparently not. And he's

7:35

gonna move him with his girlfriend, I think. And

7:38

as I said, then they might get married or they might not.

7:40

Basically, he's looking for things to sort of try

7:42

and try and justify it. And then Victoria

7:44

Beckham goes to a fashion party at Vogue before.

7:47

It's some people in the fashion industry, dear.

7:49

That's not you. Your company's fifty four

7:51

million under. You know, that's

7:53

not what you call a successful. What do you what does she go

7:55

to these things for? and then you see how

7:57

thin she is. I mean, it's just

7:59

like there's no meat on her legs. I've

8:02

seen more meat on a twiglet. It's

8:04

ridiculous. I mean, at the moment, she looks like

8:06

a pencil with two ping pong balls super glued

8:08

at the top of it. That's how bad it looks.

8:10

and so she goes to this rogue party and poses

8:12

like she's in the fashion industry. The

8:15

shop's doing so badly. How could I

8:17

mean, know, we can all open up a business and then

8:19

just watch it hemorrhage money. And that's what she's

8:21

doing. You know, there's no big

8:23

queues outside there for Christmas put a big

8:25

ribbon around the building, but to be honest with it, it's a waste

8:27

of money. You know, given the choice,

8:30

Dolce, Gabbana or Victoria Beckham. It's

8:32

a no brainer, isn't it? A no brainer.

8:35

But she still insists on going to these places

8:37

and trying to pretend she's a fashion Easter,

8:39

which, of course, she isn't. very

8:41

embarrassing. Mid

8:43

fleetwards wooden balls could go for a hundred and

8:45

four thousand pounds. They're on the album cover.

8:48

Woodnball, he pinched them. And they

8:50

reckon now, a hundred and four thousand pounds they could

8:52

go for because it's it's It's

8:54

something that's quite nice. Channel four has been

8:56

blasted by Ofcom. They put a golden

8:58

ramssey program in the end of the man who's got no

9:00

sense of the occasion, bullies everybody.

9:02

What a bully? Epping and blinding

9:05

seventeen times on a daytime television

9:07

program using the f word. A channel

9:09

forward, I would say sorry for that. Yeah.

9:11

Yeah. Of course, you were. Of course, you were.

9:13

Honestly, I mean, I didn't know the bullying

9:15

was now open, you know, it's open

9:17

scoring for them, isn't it really? There's a man

9:19

who bullies all these strumps, and that's

9:21

some blinds, all these poor people.

9:23

And then Channel four put it out, so then

9:25

Ofcom say, are you mad? And Channel four got,

9:27

oh, sorry, we had no idea. Liers.

9:30

what a liar is. You put Gordon

9:32

Rat seventeen f words,

9:34

and that was just the f word. He used all the other words

9:36

as

9:36

well. small

9:39

one of the families the way it is. And

9:41

two teenagers in North Korea.

9:44

They shared films, you

9:46

know, you get films in and they

9:48

decide to shed teenagers. North

9:51

Korea, taken into a field

9:53

and shot dead. Don't ever

9:55

go to North Korea. It's presided over by

9:57

a fat little lump, who's dragging

9:59

his daughter around at the moment. If he doesn't

10:01

like somebody, they have them executed. It's

10:03

as simple as that, two teenagers publicly

10:06

executed in a field taken out shot

10:08

dead because they shared

10:10

a film. this, you know I mean,

10:12

you you just you can't believe it. Can you really

10:14

in this day and age? That's a

10:16

prat like Kim Jong Un. Look at him.

10:18

My god you're ugly. you know,

10:20

and there he is, you know, should

10:22

them. And that's what he did. I thought he was

10:24

changing. I really did. When he did his

10:26

interview, Donald Trump, and Donald Trump went over

10:28

there. I thought perhaps there is a nice side

10:30

gym. It's a bit like putin. There

10:32

is no nice side. They're

10:34

meglamaniacs. They're people who

10:36

sort of rule by fear. And

10:38

it's a bit it's a bit embarrassing, really, because

10:40

I also wanted him to be a little bit better, and

10:42

to try and open up the board doesn't be nice. But

10:44

if he lived in North Korea, I mean, a,

10:46

your life is over. Your might as well give up now

10:48

because it's a dump of a place.

10:50

He's living an object like, look at the size

10:52

of him. Do you think he's starving? Of

10:54

course, he's not. He can't be. I see he's

10:56

got some illness which we can only pray

10:58

for. But, you know, to take teenagers out

11:00

and have them executed for sharing

11:02

a film

11:03

for sharing a film. Oh,

11:04

God, be grateful that you live here with

11:07

or without trains. A

11:09

lot of working Brits well, they're not working

11:11

at the moment because they've got long COVID

11:13

as opposed to I suppose short

11:16

COVID and they've got long COVID and so

11:18

they're not working. And it's it's

11:20

doing the rounds. Everywhere, you

11:22

know, people go, oh, you got COVID, and then

11:24

people go, well, actually, I didn't

11:26

have COVID, but I now seem to have

11:28

it. I've people writing to me yesterday.

11:30

I'm down with COVID again. I think you're messing

11:32

with the wrong people. Maxim with

11:34

the wrong people. Also, the

11:37

reality of those emotive Netflix images

11:39

for Harry and Morgan,

11:41

nothing to do with them. All the pictures are

11:43

taken from other programs. But,

11:45

you know, Harry, if he likes his life, that's

11:47

good. But I suspect he's very lonely, you

11:49

know, very shallow, and all he's

11:51

got is her. And so she's got him

11:53

twisted around her little finger and he's being made

11:55

to look like a prized chump, I'm

11:57

afraid, but they're sort of

11:59

claims of war and all the rest of it.

12:01

you know, ungrateful, little Harry, but doesn't matter

12:03

love? Doesn't matter. You do what you wanna

12:05

do. Stay in America. Don't come back here. We don't

12:07

want you. Nobody's interested in you. and

12:10

and secure starmer vous. He won't

12:12

abolish private schools. Wonder

12:14

why that would be. It's an interesting one, isn't

12:16

it? And what was the other one that I quite

12:18

liked actually? We've

12:21

done over the Russians turning away

12:23

from fake McDonald's. But

12:25

most Russians are sort of very unhappy with

12:27

the way the war is going in Ukraine because

12:29

basically, poor old Putin has just

12:31

got screwed it up. he screwed

12:33

it up. They're not doing his work. He thought he'd

12:35

walk in there and just sort of take over. Unfortunately

12:38

not. Now he looks like the big turkey for

12:40

Christmas and this year they can

12:42

sell frozen turkeys as

12:44

fresh. So you don't need to worry, no

12:46

shortage of turkeys. They've got millions

12:48

of frozen turkeys. Okay.

12:50

All you know, rears and

12:52

killed and frozen ages

12:54

ago up to about two years. I believe some of them

12:56

can be frozen food could be up to two

12:58

years old. So your Turkey was walking

13:00

around a few years back, which is lovely,

13:02

isn't it? Oh, the greatest snowman's on television

13:04

got Gemma Collins. I was gonna say

13:06

somebody called Gemma Collins because

13:08

I didn't know she was still working. I had no idea,

13:11

but apparently she's out there sort of

13:13

struggling, I should imagine. So she's got to do this

13:15

program, which sounds a bit ghastly. and

13:17

she's with a load of other people. Or, again, you

13:19

haven't heard about for them, but that's

13:21

reality television for you.

13:23

Steve alone on LVC. Calling

13:26

trust your wells, definitely cold with the soap, don't bother

13:28

going out. If you don't need to go out, don't go

13:30

out. Stay in bed. Sit in front of

13:32

the fire. If you don't have a fire, stay in

13:34

bed. It's as simple as that. There's no point going out. I was

13:36

talking to Dynamic, who's one of our

13:38

DJs on Capital Extra.

13:40

And he said, I didn't bring a coat this morning. I went,

13:42

are you mad? It's freezing

13:44

out there, freezing. But

13:46

anyway, he will learn next time

13:48

around because it's gonna get colder. They reckon

13:50

next week minus six degrees.

13:53

minus six degrees. One

13:56

in seven people denied a GP

13:58

appointment and a

14:00

boy who only ate Beige

14:02

food for eight years is now tucking

14:04

into fruit because he's had the

14:06

help of a hypnotist because some

14:08

people are like that children. You know, I

14:10

I'm only eating chicken dippers or

14:12

something like that. And they go, wouldn't you like to try something at

14:14

no? No. We don't want to eat chicken dippers. And so

14:16

they give them hypnotism, and

14:18

it it it kills them, which is actually

14:21

good. There's a call gone out to

14:23

ax parking charges to rescue the shops at

14:25

Christmas. They don't need to rescue them.

14:27

I told you I was in town Saturday

14:30

and it was heaving. Absolutely

14:33

heaving. You know,

14:35

people clutching bags that you don't need to

14:37

ax the parking charges. People come

14:39

into town on the trains and on the buses and all the rest of

14:41

it. I mean, don't seriously think the mayor is gonna

14:43

give you anything today, do you?

14:45

No. Absolutely. They don't give you nothing

14:47

at all because he's another

14:49

one who's obsessed with power. they're in

14:51

interest in themselves and the and the the

14:53

power that they've got, you know, oh, we have to we

14:55

have to be economical. We have to oh,

14:57

sold off. I'm so bored with it.

14:59

I really am. Much better health we offer to

15:01

Sandy Toxic, who's hospitalized

15:03

in Australia with pneumonia, So

15:06

we wish her better.

15:08

And Wendy and Jane, my

15:10

holy wreath girl say your wreath coming

15:12

today, Steve. thank

15:14

you about it actually the day. I put the thing up on the

15:16

door with bells on it so I can hang it straight up

15:19

which is very exciting. Kim says

15:21

my dad used to say seen

15:23

more meat on a butcher's pencil. Dad

15:25

was very slim, Steve, which made it sound

15:27

rather bizarre. My father was slim as well.

15:29

Never put because people didn't have

15:31

fast food. So my dad

15:33

was he remained the same weight throughout his

15:35

entire life. People did we weren't

15:37

fat in our family. It was only till

15:39

you started eating fast food that we all

15:41

got fat because it's all processed. It's

15:43

like if you eat pizza. Have you seen the

15:45

crap that goes into a pizza? It's not even

15:47

proper cheese. It's the

15:49

whole thing is just fake and the little tiny

15:51

bits in meat in it and all the rest of it, and the

15:53

tomatoes sauced at all the rest of it. You know,

15:55

I told you before, we went through it because they did a

15:57

big feature in the paper. how much it

15:59

costs to make a pizza.

15:59

A giant

16:01

pizza which sells for eighteen quid how much it

16:03

costs them? Pound twenty. Pound

16:05

twenty to make a pizza. A friend of mine used

16:07

to have a restaurant, Italian restaurant.

16:09

He could make a pizza for between

16:11

fifty pence and a pound. He said

16:13

that's how it that's that's that's sort of how

16:15

crap the ingredients are. you know,

16:17

the margin, huge, huge. And so when

16:19

they go and you can have a twelve inch

16:22

pizza, plus a Vieton, plus a

16:24

liter and a half of Coca Cola, only

16:26

for sixteen pounds. They're making about

16:28

fifteen pound profit on that.

16:30

Seriously, it's huge profits on pizzas because

16:32

they don't contain anything that's sort of a

16:34

genuine ingredient. It comes in

16:36

prepack bags for them. It's a little bit

16:38

embarrassing, isn't it really? The climate change, you could

16:40

wipe out Egypt's marvels for that. They're

16:42

saying about a hundred years' time. the

16:44

pyramids could just implode my

16:47

vices, go to

16:49

YouTube, type in

16:51

inside the great pyramid. and it

16:53

takes you back to a world of

16:55

enchantment. You go inside

16:57

the pyramid and they filmed inside

16:59

it and you can see they put in walkways

17:02

You can see the stones that were laid

17:05

by the Egyptian master

17:07

craftsman. You can go into the burial chamber. You

17:09

can see it all. and you walk on these

17:11

walkways up and down inside the great pyramid. I

17:13

mean, seriously, it's it's like a it's

17:15

like a a marvel, an

17:17

absolute marvel. I love

17:19

it. and there's an amateur astronomer. He's been taking pictures in

17:21

his garden. He's managed to get images of

17:23

stars and planets far

17:26

far away. really, you know,

17:27

you look at it and you think, my god.

17:30

He's taken pictures

17:30

of all these different planets and the

17:32

stars and, I mean, I'm not particularly

17:35

interested. not particularly interested in things like that, but

17:37

I'm I'm as fascinated as the as

17:39

the next person. I

17:41

really am. So here we go.

17:43

Channel four ticked off for this Ramsay's

17:46

kitchen nightmare. This is the man with

17:48

unknown. He's got stuck on hair or something on his

17:50

head. He bullies. In

17:52

this one program, he swore

17:55

thirty nine times seventeen

17:57

variants of the f word

18:00

nine s words and other

18:02

words as well. He says

18:04

my kids know not to

18:06

use naughty words. I don't swear at

18:08

home. You're on the television pat. What do you think it is?

18:10

Oh, look, is that is that real or the no.

18:12

Probably not real at all. Dreadful. Isn't

18:14

it? Dreadful. Are the Redwoods?

18:17

talking about Harry

18:19

and Meghan, the clip slammed over

18:22

fakery. I think they're both fake. I

18:24

think she's leading him by the nose. on.

18:26

Come on. Lead you by the nose, and it's making

18:28

a look like a complete and utter

18:30

twasick, I'm afraid. And

18:33

The king would have to instigate an act of parliament to strip Harry and Meghan

18:35

of Royal titles, oh, she loves it.

18:37

Doesn't she love it? Oh, I'm a duchess.

18:39

No, you're not. not behaving like a

18:41

duchess at all. You're classless, classless.

18:44

And Peter's Morgan says

18:46

Paul King Charles and Wills must be at

18:48

their wit's end waiting for the latest sickening

18:50

barrage. Yeah. But that's why Harry's always the Ned

18:52

do well. He's the spare,

18:55

but you won't need him very

18:57

shortly. It's all about hatred he goes. Of

18:59

course it is there in your world. I should imagine

19:01

she's convinced you that the whole thing is about

19:03

hatred. Well, stop using titles

19:06

then. you know, if you don't like it so much while using

19:08

titles because you love

19:10

it, that's the problem. Unfortunately,

19:12

doing yourself no favors at all. No

19:14

favors at all. But anyway, I'm sure you'll have fabulous

19:16

Christmas. Have a fabulous Christmas

19:18

air fryers, clothes airers, and electric

19:21

blankets have bucked a

19:23

down or trend for Black

19:25

Friday sales. Apparently, sales of

19:27

technology in durables fell two point

19:29

one percent. but shoppers seeking to

19:31

cut the energy bills above air fryers.

19:33

They've hundred and forty five percent, they've gone

19:35

up air fryers. They're really

19:37

good. really good, cheaper than

19:39

turning on your oven. In fact, to be honest with you, I

19:41

don't know why they're fitting ovens in places. You could just get

19:43

rid of the oven out. There's no point in having it. It's

19:45

so expensive. It's a revolutionary backlash.

19:48

Get your air fryers, get your halogen

19:50

ovens, get all these things you can cook

19:53

it, quicker. You've got a turkey in there, longer not too

19:55

big. And all your veggies and

19:57

everything else. Yeah.

19:59

I mean, to

19:59

get

19:59

that new Christmas stocking up earlier, I

20:02

love it. Gossley Fern

20:04

McCann. This was the the one

20:06

she called an acid attack victim

20:08

ugly. Really a revolting

20:10

person. Never very pleasant.

20:12

never very pleasant. And ITV

20:15

faced calls to drop her. But

20:17

apparently, she's filming a a

20:19

new series of first time mum.

20:21

basically can't find anybody. Gasoline, horrible,

20:23

hate these sort of people, hate these sort of

20:25

people on my television and that

20:27

she's booked to fly out the country today.

20:29

Good. Stay away. Don't come

20:31

back. Nancy calling somebody who was a victim of that asset

20:34

attack. Your former boyfriend wasn't it love?

20:36

We seem to remember, and you called

20:38

her ugly. You know, her her

20:40

ex boyfriend, Collins, was jailed for twenty

20:42

years for this East London nightclub

20:44

attack. Every time I see Fern on the

20:46

television, I feel physically ill,

20:48

I'm afraid. And Clemie Moody says

20:50

Harry and Meghan, just a sex tape

20:52

shy of doing a full Kim Kardashian.

20:54

To be honest with you, I

20:56

got you know, I could that being the next kind

20:58

of thing, can't all this Christmas food? I like

21:00

going through all the supermarkets, finding out what Christmas

21:02

food they've got on offer because there really

21:05

is a good a good variant. out

21:08

there. I mean, but most of it needs either deep

21:10

frying or oven cooking or

21:12

something like that. And they do

21:14

I mean, some of the Some of the supermarkets

21:16

are very adventurous, and some of them

21:18

are not very adventurous. Because

21:20

you sort of you sort of look at the food in the oven. It

21:22

looks quite exciting. Take it. I

21:24

bought Satsuit in again today, and these are from

21:27

Waitrose, and they're two pounds

21:29

of box of Satsuit was a

21:31

dirt cheap, that I might go and pinch one

21:33

again. Pitch one of my own satzumas because

21:35

they're really nice actually and they're I only buy

21:37

easy peel and seedless.

21:40

I don't buy it. If it's got Pipps in it,

21:42

Pipps? No. Thank you. And I won't do anything that

21:44

I can't peel with my fingers or sort of bite

21:46

a little bit out of it and then do it.

21:49

A family of scraped their charity

21:51

Christmas lights display because the lucky bill

21:53

is too high. And

21:55

it's a shame really because I do like

21:58

people who put up lights outside

22:00

their house. I don't like it when there's too

22:02

many lights, you know, and

22:04

plastic reindeer and all sorts of bits

22:06

and pieces. But think

22:08

lights outside somebody's house for people who can't

22:10

afford to put Christmas lights

22:12

up. I think they look fantastic. I

22:14

really do I mean, I really do. I like that sort

22:16

of thing. I could happily drive around looking

22:18

at people's lights and peering in their way. I

22:20

don't actually go up the garden path and have a quick peek

22:22

in the sitting room. I'm not that

22:25

math. but I like driving past the house and get because the

22:27

Americans do it so much better than we do.

22:29

I've got a book at home on all

22:31

American light displays.

22:33

If you go to YouTube, type in American

22:35

lights to music, the

22:38

and they've got lights that flash up. I mean,

22:40

seriously, they must spend a forty, but they're beautiful. friend

22:42

Ian is over there, and

22:44

they've got lovely lights.

22:46

Really lovely lights on YouTube. So American

22:50

Christmas lights, and there

22:52

you go, the full Christmas show, that's

22:54

done to music. That is done

22:56

to music. And

22:58

it's the music he's and and and

23:00

and and it's it's I

23:02

think it's Polar Express or something

23:05

like that. They're really,

23:07

really lovely. And these people must spend a

23:09

fortune. They haven't they don't they don't have the problems

23:11

that we have. But look at it, oh, it's it's

23:13

just I mean, you could seriously the

23:15

National Grid would go mad.

23:17

Would go mad. It's beautiful. I wouldn't

23:19

even like to imagine how much these people spend, but

23:21

they're done so proficient. They haven't just blown

23:23

up a reindeer. and stuck it on the front lawn. These these

23:25

are sort of properly done lights. And then

23:28

they all changed. It's just

23:30

amazing. No. The garage door lights

23:32

up as well. Of course, they're American.

23:34

I I could sit

23:37

and watch them for ages. Have you got the music

23:39

on as well? the

23:41

music's really good, very, very

23:43

good. Steve, I can't

23:45

actually believe that I'm gonna

23:47

catch all of your show from the start today instead of

23:49

catch up excellent feeling sick, Kerrie Matt Kirstenally.

23:51

I know. I couldn't believe

23:53

it either. I was sort of like, you know, sometimes you

23:55

hear the news. and you go, oh, not

23:58

Kirsty alley. Cancer. Isn't

24:00

it terrible? You know, it's only because I

24:02

watch cheers every morning.

24:04

because it's on my television every

24:07

morning. Exhausting day to

24:09

day for my favorite methodist minister

24:11

over in Minnesota. Jake,

24:14

he says, Sometimes people are the worst,

24:16

aren't they? I had a friend for over six years. She

24:18

got a new boyfriend and decided we couldn't

24:20

be friends. It's not fun to be

24:22

disposable. On the bright side, I'm on the

24:24

bright side, he says, I'm enjoying a

24:26

Prosecco. That's the cure all, isn't it?

24:28

I've had things like that. You get sort of

24:30

people who you've been friends with

24:32

for years and years and years and all of a sudden something

24:34

happens and they don't wanna be your friend

24:36

anymore. And I always think, well,

24:38

don't be. Don't

24:40

be. You know, it's your loss.

24:42

Not my loss. I get over it very

24:44

quickly. I've been awake since two says

24:46

Maggie. Don't want to go to think. I've I've Somebody

24:48

gave me a piece of paper the other day. They came

24:50

up to me and they thrust it in my hand. They

24:52

said, we met this this

24:54

lady. and she listens to all the time.

24:56

She's your number one fan, and

24:58

her name is Maureen Harrington.

25:01

She's in Surrey. and she's eighty nine

25:03

years young. To

25:05

Maureen, good morning. I hope you are

25:07

well and keeping warm. Yeah. They thrust

25:09

it into my hand the other day in sis

25:11

tape. your biggest fan. So I'm very pleased.

25:13

Hey, sorry? I don't know

25:15

who it was. It was just given to

25:17

me. Aside from to mask.

25:19

I never asked these things. So in

25:22

the meanwhile, Jake is now gonna be enjoying

25:24

Prosecco throughout the entire probe. Have you ever heard of

25:26

a minister? drinking Brisecco. I

25:28

should cocoa with it. You talked

25:30

recently about the Christmas albums that

25:32

you play in the car. What do you think a

25:34

fairy tale of New York? not really

25:36

one of my favorites, John. It's

25:38

okay. It's

25:40

okay. It's not my favorite. If if I

25:42

was given a choice

25:43

carrels. I love Christmas carrels.

25:45

Carrel are the bells, harp the herald

25:47

angels. They'll come only for all the big stuff,

25:49

but I love it.

25:51

with orchestra and chorus. It's gotta

25:53

be orchestra. It's gotta be a bloody big

25:56

orchestra because it's the only way that they

25:58

sound fantastic.

26:00

Steve Malone from LVC, taxed

26:03

84850 Only a

26:05

very nice to be company Tuesday,

26:07

December the sixth that's Steve Allen's early breakfast. You're

26:09

very welcome, and it's nice to have your company. I don't

26:11

care who you are. Okay. Where you are, might as

26:13

well all just sort of huddle together and try and

26:15

keep the heat in because otherwise, we're all gonna

26:18

freeze to death, which is not good. A

26:20

very cold car often is

26:22

where Jenny is. Oh, it's all cold out

26:24

of town, isn't it? think in the Brecon beat

26:26

because they had a light dusting of snow,

26:28

which sounds sounds delicious until you look at

26:30

it, you think that even the sheep look a bit fed

26:32

up with it. My tea towel says Jenny arrived

26:35

yesterday. It is fabulous. You'll be having

26:37

breakfast with me today. Love the show every

26:39

day. Thank you. Thank

26:41

you. And that one here that says Steve, I didn't

26:43

listen yesterday's. I tuned in late and would have

26:45

been on the naughty step. I

26:47

refused to accept people who turn up

26:49

late to this program. We start at four, and four is

26:51

the time you will be here. Okay?

26:53

We're not messing about. I'm just ridiculous.

26:56

And another one

26:59

that says a lot of people asking about

27:01

wham last Christmas. The only song you

27:03

never said, no. I like the video,

27:05

but the song I'm a bit bored

27:08

with. The video I thought was quite good. They went out into

27:10

into some snow and it was proper snow.

27:12

I still like snow is

27:14

falling all around us.

27:16

Children

27:16

play in. have enthusiasm,

27:19

love and understanding.

27:23

Merry

27:23

Christmas, everyone

27:25

but a time furlzer and so he

27:28

goes on. I think that's really catchy.

27:30

They're very catchy song. They're very catchy

27:32

song. But wham's last Christmas,

27:34

good video. Shamed about the

27:36

song. Last Christmas, I gave you

27:38

my love, and boy did he give his

27:40

love? Did he give his love? bless

27:42

his heart. Here's somebody

27:44

called Meghan Fox going

27:46

out in Florida where I'm assuming they don't have

27:48

the temperatures that plummet the same as we do.

27:50

because she's basically wearing a piece of material, hugging

27:53

her boobies to her body. I mean,

27:55

honestly, you go out looking like trash,

27:57

dear. You do worry about it, don't

27:59

you? What do we got here? What have

28:01

we got here? This is a missing

28:03

line of duty. There's a new one

28:05

coming up. It's an oil rig

28:07

drama, same cast, same

28:09

director. And so in other words, why

28:11

would you bother? Why would you bother? I

28:13

was watching a lovely program the other day that it was

28:16

on high clear. on downtown

28:18

Abhi and and the

28:20

family that live there and how lovely they

28:22

are and all the rest of it. We have we have

28:24

spoken to the lady from the house

28:26

The lady, what owns, Heiko, and

28:29

she was absolutely delightful.

28:31

I can't tell you how delightful she

28:33

was. Absolutely delightful. totally

28:36

unaffected. Jonathan on Tower Hill says having

28:38

opened, the Liberty Christmas

28:40

shopping last Sunday morning, the London gay

28:42

men's chorus. as a sold out

28:44

Christmas concert at Saint Martin in the fields on

28:46

Thursday evening, a hundred

28:48

plus singers. We don't need an

28:50

orchestra just a keyboard will raise the

28:52

roof, oh, that'll be good. London gay

28:54

men's course has been going for donkey

28:56

shares. I used to know you said, I

28:58

used to know because they used to sort of

29:00

write you on a regular basis, a couple of coppers from Nottingham, and

29:03

they were in the London gay men's chorus

29:05

as well. And so

29:07

you you don't you're right. You don't

29:09

need an orchestra, but that it would change it,

29:11

wouldn't that? If you had an orchestra, that

29:13

would be fantastic. But I mean, you

29:15

know, a keyboard You'll raise the roof.

29:17

Lovely. I love stuff like that. Anybody who

29:20

sings gets my

29:22

vote. So here we've got the

29:24

people. This year's Channel Force greatest

29:26

snowman. So they've got Jemma Collins. I mean,

29:28

to be honest with you, I thought she said she'd lost weight. I'd

29:30

ought to be rude. But if you go around

29:33

telling everybody, you know, I've lost three

29:35

stone. And then the next time we see

29:37

you, the people standing next to you, I

29:39

mean, one of them, I don't

29:41

know who she is actually. She could be a

29:43

DJ called Yinkha. She might be, I don't

29:45

know. She's like this

29:47

thing. It's like standing next to

29:49

Victoria Beckham. You know, in poor old

29:51

gemicollins, they took her out to the

29:53

to this sort of jungle, I

29:56

suppose, not a jungle, like a forest. but

29:58

her hair looks rank. It looks

29:59

dry mainly because I don't think it's her

30:02

hair. I think it's thing that they they've got the

30:04

guy from the in

30:06

between as Joe Thomas he went out

30:08

there. So I quite like that.

30:11

Also, we like Ramesh

30:13

Ranganathan. He's worked with two of the

30:15

best looking men in sport, Jamie Redknapp,

30:17

but boring as hell. God knows

30:19

he's dull. God's truth.

30:23

and Freddie Flintov, who is

30:25

good. Well, I mean, I like both of them,

30:27

but you know, Jamie ran a boar.

30:29

boar ring. you know, there are some people you

30:31

sit there. I mean, you could literally, you could nod

30:33

off. You could absolutely nod off and

30:35

just give up completely, I think. I'm determined

30:37

to bring you this story about these people

30:39

who labeled their

30:41

their neighbor because these

30:43

people need to be exposed. I'm glad

30:45

that they've They've actually oh, look, as a

30:47

picture of Jamie Ridnap. He's called his

30:49

baby son after his favorite

30:51

teenage mutant ninja turtle. He's

30:53

called him Rafael. something

30:55

to matter with these people. It's not normal. It's a it's

30:57

not normal. So him and his wife,

31:00

Frieda, welcomed their tot a

31:02

year ago. And he said, as I've got a bit

31:04

older, I'm a

31:06

bit more understanding of things. No. No.

31:08

You're really not. Sorry, dear. I

31:10

know you might think you are, but definitely not.

31:12

and you know that status quo, whatever

31:14

you want, they only

31:17

agreed to open Live Aid so they could go home

31:19

early. They didn't know that the

31:21

show was get global attention.

31:23

They had no idea. And

31:25

Rosie said, I didn't realize until we walked on,

31:27

we were like, do your gig and get out, go on,

31:29

do your hits and go home. when we

31:31

walked off everywhere they were standing and there was a

31:33

different look on people's faces of,

31:35

wow, you know, I can

31:37

imagine what it must have been like. Have absolutely amazing.

31:39

Absolutely amazing. Here's another

31:41

picture of Maya JAMA. So all she does

31:43

is sort of a picture's taken. When it comes to

31:45

presenting, it's a bit lame.

31:47

I'm afraid she's the new love island host. So

31:49

in other words, thank God, you don't need to say

31:51

too much because nobody's that interested.

31:54

Channel Florent Passenger. A post box

31:56

gets a full first class festive makeover with

31:59

woolly, snow, and robins. I like people to

32:01

decorate post boxes. I

32:03

really do. People knit things.

32:05

and then they put them stretch them over the top of the

32:07

post box. So do you think that's nice? I think

32:09

that's lovely. I can't wait to get the missile to it.

32:11

That'll freak out the program, I'll tell you. producer

32:14

be going. Don't don't bring in missile to stay with that. I'm

32:16

bringing in a missile tote. I'm bringing in

32:18

a tree of it. Prices are falling after the

32:20

hot summer produced a bumper crop.

32:22

online marketplace Etsy is selling Spriggs for ten

32:24

quid. That's eight pound cheaper than last year.

32:27

But I don't know why. I've never quite

32:29

worked out because it's poisonous. as

32:31

you know. But why kissing under the missile

32:33

toe is supposed to be that if you wanna kiss them,

32:35

you're you're crumbly. You don't

32:38

have to kiss them under a bit of missile toe.

32:40

What's up into that. I come in

32:42

oh, it's yeah. I remember walking around

32:44

the LBC Christmas party some years

32:47

ago. Hello? Chris, miss or

32:49

toe?

32:49

Hello?

32:50

Nothing. Not a peep. Seriously,

32:53

I would have done better to have got drunk and go,

32:55

cohort, who wants to snog? We'll

32:57

be much more cheese here. So we're gonna

32:59

get minus ten degrees soon.

33:01

Soon. Minus ten, you don't want minus ten

33:03

degrees. You really don't want minus ten degrees. But

33:05

it doesn't matter It doesn't matter because we always

33:07

put on an extra vest and and

33:10

sort of, you know, thick thick

33:12

knickers, I think. Oh, here we go. Britain is to

33:14

get its first czar to brush up our

33:17

public loop system, MPs have decided.

33:19

Do we have something? It was this woman,

33:21

Amy Lane. lame she was,

33:23

and she was the night czar in London. I

33:25

think she got paid something like she might still be

33:27

being paid, I don't know, thirty or forty

33:29

grand a year. And

33:30

you think, do what? It was another

33:32

one of

33:32

these crackpots signings up. I

33:35

couldn't quite work it out. Predictive

33:37

trick for of money. We said we're wasting

33:39

money left right and center. You know, give it to the

33:41

people who matter, the people who run to live in a

33:44

tent. Here you go. Amy Lam

33:46

was appointed Nightstar in twenty sixteen, tasked

33:48

with ensuring London thrives as a twenty four hour

33:50

city. What got to know does she know about

33:53

it? No. Nothing about it. Nothing at all about things that

33:55

I don't even know she's still in the job. I

33:57

wasn't you know, I couldn't couldn't

33:59

remember. At a minute, she was appointed down down

34:01

down down down down down down. There you

34:03

go. This final work is driven on the usual

34:05

guff, isn't it, really? And she was tasked with ensuring

34:07

London's ride to the twenty four

34:10

hour city. A role

34:12

involved championing London's nightlife, both

34:14

in the UK and internationally, providing

34:16

safeguarding venues across the city. She's

34:19

Chair of

34:20

the Nighttime Bara Champions

34:22

Network. I mean, don't please go

34:24

and tell me she's still not

34:26

there. from made any difference at all.

34:29

No difference. Absolute rubbish it

34:31

really is. Anton Deck should They

34:33

would they turned up something the other day

34:35

I was watching on television. Oh, it might have

34:37

been. It I looking Shirley Bassi, singing that song. It

34:39

goes, nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah

34:41

nah nah nah

34:44

nah nah. Hay Jude and unbelievably brilliant

34:46

it was. And then the Queen did a whole show

34:48

in Anton Deck with her because, you know, you can't have

34:50

anything on the television, but it's ITV.

34:53

without Anton Deck turning up. The two people who

34:55

look as over eighteen ninety, but are now heading

34:57

into their fifties. Doesn't seem possible,

35:00

really doesn't. Steve,

35:02

Steve Steve. So we wish Jonathan from

35:04

Tower Hill very best with the London

35:06

gay men's course sold out.

35:08

what I like to see. I like to hear that word sold

35:10

out and something that Matt Goss would like to hear sold out. He'd

35:12

like to hear that. And at

35:14

the pool that was leaking, says

35:18

Pete the poor man is now fixed.

35:20

I drained it, replaced the

35:22

hydrostatic valve and is now filling up as

35:24

we speak, Christmas is saved. That's brilliant.

35:26

He said it's great to be the

35:28

best in the business, isn't it? I wouldn't

35:32

know. Alison says, I used to sing an acquirer and enjoy this time.

35:34

I love Carol sung by a good choir and have

35:36

lots of favorites. Sussex Carol

35:38

or the

35:40

Shepard's pipes Carol of my favorite peers. I went to school with the late

35:42

George Michael. Look at you

35:44

name dropping. It's unbelievable. Viv

35:48

in Suffolk still a bit better day.

35:50

Rothenkoff now. TTel arrived

35:52

yesterday lovely. This lovely, isn't it?

35:54

And thank you so much, everybody. Patrick says,

35:56

how come missile tow costs more during COVID when you couldn't go

35:59

near anybody? 0II don't bother with me. I

36:01

mean, they sell it. Paul Cooper sells missile tow. They

36:03

got it wrapped up in

36:06

bags and things like that. And I suppose you can go into I mean, if I walked into somebody's house

36:08

and they've got mistletoe hanging up, I'd be

36:10

avoiding that doorway. I'd ought to be

36:12

sort of grabbed and wrestled to

36:14

the floor. know, just for just for

36:16

a just for a snug

36:18

goodness sake. Yeah. You'd have to get around it.

36:20

I'd have to sort of crawl on hands

36:22

and knees When I was sixteen, Steve says Jimmy, in nineteen

36:24

seventy nine, I was in the cadet force at

36:26

school. We had to spend a night in a

36:28

tent on the Brecon Beacons when it

36:30

was snowing. Our tent blew

36:32

away in the night. We had to wake up a

36:34

farm and his wife in a remote

36:36

cottage to use their phone and call for help last

36:38

time I went

36:40

camping. Yeah. Yeah. You should do. It's very cold out

36:42

there. People are living in tents on the strand,

36:44

literally less than less than, you know,

36:46

three hundred yards away from where I am at

36:48

the moment. It's

36:50

so cold. And Ed says, when it gets cold, I don't worry about

36:52

the birds. I don't worry about the birds. They're

36:55

fine. They're absolutely fine.

36:58

They they survive all of this. You don't find birds frozen to death.

37:00

They really don't. The only time you'll

37:02

see it is when pigeons are nearing the end

37:05

of their life. and they'll be sitting on the ground and you'll go near

37:07

them and they won't move. You know that they're going to

37:09

be dead the next time you see them. Did

37:11

you know Rick Parfitt Lived

37:14

in Teddington says Matt, dead

37:16

now. But, yeah, he used to live

37:18

near Teddington Lock. He used to live in a block of

37:20

flats just

37:22

down there. So I used to say, he used to drive his Rolls Royce into

37:24

Twickenham. Said mine used to look a

37:26

lot better. I have

37:29

to say that. Steve Steve, Steve. Jordi Lasses

37:32

own the most shoes in

37:34

Britain. They just can't walk in the blum in things,

37:36

which is a

37:38

bit of a bit of a pain. And what have we got

37:40

here? What have we got here? The true

37:42

story by the cooked up

37:44

critter, the coked up critter that became

37:46

really wild. This is a

37:48

bear. It's a it's a

37:50

bear that went up on a rampage

37:52

apparently. It ate. It's a real

37:54

story data box

37:56

of cocaine. and they might completely mess. So they've made a film about it.

37:58

I mean, cocaine beer.

37:59

They've heard of such a stupid title. All the

38:02

kids going, what's what's cocaine,

38:04

mum? It's

38:06

a drug. Can we

38:06

have some? Do they sell it in the shop in the cinema? No.

38:08

No. They don't dare. No. People

38:10

die for it. You know? The

38:13

two teenagers publicly executed for sharing films from

38:16

the rivals South. The lads were

38:18

aged about sixteen and they were shot

38:20

dead. On the instructions of Kim

38:22

Jong Un, He started to crack

38:24

down on influences. Maybe it'll

38:26

be you fatty. You know, you're the

38:28

influencer. Under there was

38:30

sixteen. Sixteen.

38:32

The authorities warn those who watch or distribute

38:34

South Korean movies and dramas will

38:36

be sentenced to death. They're not messing about

38:38

with it. It's a case of

38:40

you will be shot. You know, not warned or anything

38:43

like that. Iran was the same. If you

38:45

were gay in Iran and then

38:47

you would sit sixteen, they kept you until you were eighteen, then

38:49

they hanged you. And they would bring these

38:52

cranes into these villages and

38:54

hang people who threw no fault to

38:56

their own, had gay

38:58

relationships, and they hang them. You need

39:00

to look at some of the mullers over in Iran to

39:02

realize that there was nobody gayer than

39:04

they were. I couldn't believe it. The the atrocities committed throughout the world, but

39:06

shooting teenage boys because they

39:08

watched a film from

39:10

South Korea. You're going straight to in

39:12

a handcart you really are. Steve, hello.

39:14

On LVC, text

39:16

84850 Morning.

39:18

Nice

39:18

to be a company at eleven minutes

39:20

to five. I know. I can't believe it either.

39:23

Seriously, eleven minutes to five, anything. I was talking

39:25

to my driver John this morning.

39:28

And, you know, somebody a common question people saying, who listens

39:30

to radio overnight? I go, everybody.

39:33

Everybody. Biggest audiences

39:36

ever. biggest audiences ever big increase in London, big increase

39:38

in London, which is quite nice actually.

39:40

Queit nice. So here is the story

39:43

of the family. in the

39:45

village poison pen case. They're a revolting

39:48

bunch they really are.

39:50

So the family who branded a

39:52

millionaire author

39:54

A sex predator. In a vile poison pen campaign

39:57

could face a bill for the

39:59

Math's teacher

39:59

turned off from publisher

40:02

Richard Parsons sued

40:04

Elizabeth Garnett, her husband, Alan,

40:06

and their daughter, Katie Arbsted

40:09

for harassment and libel.

40:12

They're

40:12

a revolting family, and I'm glad that they've lost.

40:14

I'm glad you will as

40:15

well. The high court heard the

40:18

campaign against the order began in twenty eighteen

40:20

when he was posted a

40:22

communication that read once upon sign, there

40:24

was a rude word.

40:25

It was you, the

40:27

end. Mister Parsons, who

40:29

is the former maths teacher turned

40:32

author who lives

40:32

in Broughton and Furnace in cumbria

40:34

with his wife and two children suspected

40:37

the garnets who found on Islam were to blame. In May

40:39

twenty nineteen, a letter was posted to

40:41

the managing director of his

40:44

publishing company acusing mister

40:46

Parsons of sexually exploiting a

40:48

woman in the village and

40:50

comparing him to Hollywood's sexual

40:52

predator Harvey

40:54

Weinstein. This was followed by another letter. Another

40:56

letter which compared

40:57

him to

40:58

another high profile person

41:02

This is justice Collins Rice as it was accepted that all allegations against

41:05

mister Parsons who made a hundred and

41:07

fifteen million pound fortune

41:10

from best selling GCSE study guides were false

41:13

and defamatory. This is what you

41:15

cannot do. This

41:15

is where the law comes

41:17

down very quickly. on

41:19

that revolting family who decided,

41:22

this is Elizabeth Garnett,

41:24

her husband, Alan Garnett, and

41:27

their daughter Katy Armistade, Harrisman, and libel.

41:29

There are obviously people of limited

41:31

intelligence because they made these

41:33

public statements. Mister

41:35

Parsons, Once he'd got things decided to

41:38

to instruct lawyers and suit the garnets

41:40

in pre action correspondence,

41:42

the guy Arnitz denied originating the material but made limited

41:44

admissions of small scale onward

41:46

publication and said they would vigorously

41:48

defend any

41:50

action. Anyway,

41:51

last month, their solicitor said there was a change of

41:53

plan because they were basically scummy

41:56

liars and they would not be defending

41:58

the claim. So somebody had obviously

41:59

said to them, listen, you can't be that bloody

42:02

stupid, can you? So lawyers, mister

42:04

Parcels, this week, asked for a default

42:06

to be entered in his favor against all three defendants

42:08

for libel, and mister missus

42:10

Garnett only for Harrisman.

42:12

Granting him the judgment, the

42:14

judge ordered mister missus Garnett to

42:17

pay eight thousand pounds damages jointly

42:19

for libel, plus twelve

42:22

thousand pounds for harassment,

42:24

and missus amcentered to pay two

42:26

thousand pounds for libel on a thick valet, how thick she

42:28

also ordered the defendants. To

42:30

pay forty five thousand pounds,

42:34

for mister Parsons legal costs, which are expected to run to hundred thousand

42:37

pounds. Huddl teach you the

42:39

disgusting Allan Garnett, Elizabeth Garnett,

42:41

and daughter Katie Armistade

42:44

Yuck. Yuck. I'm glad you've been exposed in all the papers to the people

42:46

that you are. You make claims against somebody.

42:49

They're taking you to

42:52

town darlings. taking you to town. And that's one hundred thousand

42:54

pound. Good. Good. You

42:56

know, more people like

42:56

that. You know, people who was

43:00

reading the other day, you know

43:02

the woman who was confronted by Susan Hussey

43:05

in the Palace

43:06

in Buckingham Putt.

43:08

Yes,

43:09

and nosy finale finale. And

43:11

she got trolled. Apparently

43:13

unbelievably trolled.

43:14

would actually if I

43:17

was her, I'd have gone to the

43:19

police. All those people who trolled her,

43:21

I'd get them into court straight

43:23

away. I would have no hesitation you make them pay. It's

43:25

as simple as that. Trolls that I've sent

43:27

you before, these are the people who write to people. They've,

43:29

you know, people who have

43:31

lost children through illness or disease or all sorts

43:34

of things or they've taken their own lives. These

43:36

people write to them and come

43:38

up with you know, the most disgusting things, and it's because they limited

43:40

intelligence. What they are is people who've

43:42

achieved nothing in their life. They

43:44

haven't got anything to look

43:46

up to. So anybody

43:48

who's marginally more famous than they

43:50

are, they they pick

43:52

on. And in the case of that revolting

43:54

family a moment ago, hundred thousand

43:56

pounds. You know, as far as I'm concerned that,

43:58

you know, if they've got a house, make them

43:59

sell it. Make them sell

44:01

it. Get that money and none of

44:03

this O will have to declare ourselves bankrupt while

44:06

he be declared bankrupt then just before

44:08

Christmas. You know, make him pay for it.

44:10

And he's saying things like that to a man who has

44:12

done so much good and raised

44:14

so much money and, you know, lined his own

44:16

nest at the same time, but through being

44:18

quite brilliant. So

44:20

well done. Steve, listening to you from

44:22

Goa in India, very hot I can

44:24

imagine Veronica must be absolutely boiling in

44:26

Goa. It

44:28

must be. and

44:30

SidCap Julie says, I received my

44:32

tea towel, then going out quick, aren't they?

44:34

They think

44:34

so. I think they're going out very quick. I'm

44:37

taking it to my spin class using it

44:39

to wipe my sweaty face, but really showing off my towel. Well,

44:41

they are they are very good quality and

44:43

bigger than you imagine.

44:46

Here we go. Narrow boat Mike. So just

44:48

woken up to you. You say it's forecast to

44:50

be minus sixteen minus ten. Mine's

44:54

ten. He says that'll mean all the taps on the

44:56

pontoon's will probably freeze more long if you go to

44:58

Tesco for water, plus ice on the

45:00

inside of

45:02

the windows. There

45:02

you go. Mark in Western Australia says

45:04

I was flicking through the

45:05

TV channels the other day and Kenneth Williamson

45:07

said James popped up Obviously,

45:09

it was a carry on film, but I didn't recognize it.

45:11

Turns out it was carry on cruising. Oh,

45:14

yes. Love carry on cruising.

45:16

All the goodies are in that one. especially that

45:18

little lady in it, have not forgotten her name. It'll

45:20

come to me in a moment. Don't don't worry. Fear

45:22

not. And

45:24

Esther somebody. She she

45:26

told her she was also in carry on cabbie, which

45:28

I watched the other day, but in carry on cruising.

45:30

She's sort of somebody who wants to be a

45:32

physically fit for Esmy Cannon. I've

45:35

just remembered. Mark and Robert says, do you remember ice road truckers driving

45:37

in minus fifty degrees? No. I've heard

45:39

of the program, but

45:41

I don't remember watching

45:44

it. We had is it,

45:46

right, ice road truckers. We had when

45:48

we were in in the Arctic

45:50

Circle, we had minus thirty.

45:53

windshield factor minus thirty and that believe you me

45:55

was about as cold as I ever want to be in

45:57

my entire life because everything for all the hairs

46:00

in your

46:02

nose freeze. Hairs in your ears, free. Everything

46:04

freezes. It's so so cold. We run

46:06

skidoos, and it was

46:08

lovely, but they had

46:10

heated handles a ski doo. It looks like a thing

46:12

you see on the water, you know,

46:14

with a it

46:16

looks like

46:18

a scooter. No. It looks like a scooter, but it's under

46:21

water. And only scadoos, you have

46:23

them on the land and it's

46:25

got a belt runs underneath it

46:28

and they use them

46:29

through snow. No, it's

46:32

motorized. It's a big engine on the back of it. I

46:34

think it have a look you'll know

46:36

what it is. I think it's SKID double

46:38

o, but I might be wrong, maybe because

46:40

I've never written the word down. I have no

46:42

idea, but you'll you'll sit and you go,

46:45

yeah. There you go. You know, and you they

46:47

they take them out. and

46:50

And it's like a

46:50

jet ski, but it's all it's the land version.

46:52

And they've got heated handlebarls, but to be honest

46:54

with so cold it didn't make any difference. Yeah. It's

46:56

I mean, we went on it

46:57

and everybody's got them out there. That's the only way you can

46:59

get through the snow. You

47:02

can't get any other way unless you

47:04

use the the huskies, which

47:06

they do. They do

47:08

use the huskies all the

47:10

time actually, which is which is quite nice. I

47:12

quite like husk. They're very popular, but also

47:14

the most abandoned dog. People

47:17

have got these these

47:19

dogs now. and there was place the other day in the paper

47:21

and they've got they've got loads of

47:23

abandoned huskies. And I thought they're not quite nice.

47:25

They've got these these other ones

47:27

have got really bright blue eyes if they've got contact lenses in. Really, really

47:30

nice. Really, really nice.

47:34

A depth l was revealed she met God during a Caribbean holiday whilst

47:36

absolutely off her face. Of course, she

47:38

did do. Of course, she did. That's a

47:40

trouble. And they get off their faces, and

47:42

then they tell you I was

47:44

off my face at the same time. You know just telling porky pies, which isn't

47:46

so good. Mm-mm. Mm-mm.

47:48

Boozy's staff wall, they could be

47:52

sack if they misbehave at the Christmas party. Everybody mispaves.

47:54

Everybody. That's what people do at Chris the

47:56

whole idea is you go to the Christmas

47:58

party to get off with somebody even

48:02

after for all year. That's how long you don't go there to sit in

48:04

the corner and eat a cheese and pineapple on

48:06

a stick and have a couple of twiglets you're

48:08

going there to pull. That's the

48:12

whole point. you know, and then to go back into the office

48:14

and photocopy your bottom on the

48:16

photocopy. That's what people

48:18

do.

48:19

Sometimes even worse. sometimes even

48:21

worse. William Chatner, still beaming at ninety one

48:24

as he entertains devoted fans at a comic

48:26

book convention.

48:29

And the UK's most miserable place has

48:31

been revealed as Colchester. In Essex,

48:33

well, it's a bit of a shame. We got

48:35

people in Colchester. The city

48:37

other grim locations, by the way, Norwich,

48:40

Greenwich, stumpage wells, and

48:42

Lambert in South Not not

48:44

not not not

48:46

stumpage wells. Ian lived

48:46

down that way. Ian Dale. He's Tombridge Wells' boy. My

48:49

friend my friend Rich. He's down

48:51

there as well. Oh, gosh. I

48:53

don't like that idea. I've

48:55

been to Cambridge Wells. I thought it

48:57

was quite posh. I really did. I don't I don't

48:59

know why I thought it was posh. I just

49:01

just thought it was. Sunday league football is now so

49:03

violent. It's only a matter of time, say, FA Chiefs,

49:05

before somebody's killed. Knives

49:08

and other weapons

49:08

are being taken into matches. as

49:11

local steves. Bless

49:14

me. Thank you. As as

49:16

apparently, local playing fields turned into

49:20

battlegrounds. dear.

49:20

Don't like that idea. Also,

49:24

what have we got here? A gang of

49:26

Ukrainian art

49:28

thieves have been busted for ripping a a banksey mirror off a wall.

49:30

A gang of Ukrainian art

49:32

thieves. Are they at war? Shouldn't they

49:34

be sort of doing things like that?

49:38

And Love Island returns for a winter series in January.

49:40

You've got mayor JAMA taken

49:42

over from Laura Whittmoor. Laura Whittmoor wasn't the

49:45

world's greatest presenter, and Mayor JAMA's

49:47

not. but she gets loads of pictures in the paper, but the actual sort

49:49

of utterances are not the most

49:52

brilliant. And I was to sum

49:54

up this year, the public has opted for

49:56

the phrase goblin mode. This was the

49:58

phrase. Yeah, picked up. We

50:00

did it on the program before, picked up ninety

50:02

three percent of the word of

50:04

the year. vote.

50:06

It's defined as being unapologetically self, indulgent,

50:09

lazy, slovenly, or

50:12

greedy. So it's goblin

50:14

mode. You're in goblin

50:16

mode. I'm a to be honest with

50:18

you. Did we do

50:19

a sound of Oh, I can't

50:21

remember. I almost know. I get I get so confused with things. Oh, that

50:23

music indicates that we have the news coming

50:25

up very shortly. So you

50:27

got an open journey

50:30

to catch up with the news

50:32

and then get yourself

50:32

a nice quick cup of tea and try and

50:35

face the day because it's Tuesday.

50:37

On your radio, on

50:38

global player,

50:41

and -- Play. LDC.

50:44

Leading Britain's conversation,

50:47

this is LDC.

50:54

This is LVC from

50:56

global, leading

50:58

Britain's Congress nation

51:01

with Steve Allen. Morning,

51:07

everybody had Tuesday. Tuesday's good day. You know why? Come

51:10

on. Why is Tuesday a good day?

51:11

It's because if you're a pensioner, why is Tuesday a

51:13

good day? because if you go to Iceland, you get

51:15

ten percent discount.

51:18

They give you if you're a pensioner, ten percent discount in Iceland. Just remember

51:21

to say at the till, are you

51:23

still doing the discount? a discount

51:25

and they'll knock ten

51:26

percent off your bill. Everything. Fantastic.

51:28

I love it.

51:28

I tell you I quite like the idea of being a

51:30

pensioner. I used to think the words sort of

51:32

downsize of it, but now I've covered people

51:35

off of me a seat on the Seriously, I must look

51:36

really ancient and frail and things like that.

51:39

But once you get the train yesterday, I was quite

51:41

pleased. I didn't think I was gonna

51:44

get it. what I normally do is I walk to the front of the train,

51:46

whereas I've learned, if it's sort

51:47

of running out of time, just get on a walk

51:49

through the carriages, but, you know,

51:51

there's no room if you've got bags

51:53

with you and stuff like that, which I've always got, I've

51:56

always got bags with me. I never travel

51:58

without bags. Today, I've got to

52:00

take my boxes back to the chemist so they can fill them up for

52:02

Christmas, which is which is nice

52:04

and I like things like that. And who

52:06

knows if I gotta get? Oh,

52:08

sticky pads. I'm trying to get

52:10

sticky pads the other day I bought some. Put them on the

52:12

back of this thing, which I need to put in a lift at

52:14

home. And it stuck to it, but

52:16

I can't get the other

52:18

bit off. which is a bit of a

52:20

an unpertinent needle or something like that. If you're three wishes

52:22

for Christmas, for we are into

52:25

the festive season, include a great family film to

52:27

settle down with after lunch. The BBC have

52:30

granted you your wish with Will

52:32

Smith's blockbuster

52:34

Aladdin. And it's

52:36

full of magical fun. And

52:38

after the pudding is what nobody's pudding,

52:42

Nobody has pudding at Christmas. Nobody can manage pudding. You can eat

52:44

the dinner. You can't manage Christmas

52:46

pudding. I don't believe anybody. Everybody

52:49

buys the blasted things. and

52:51

we set fire to it and it's great the curtains go

52:53

up, you know, and they did to call a fire

52:55

brigade. But nobody ever reads Christmas before they go,

52:57

I'll tell you what, Let's let lunch

52:59

go down, then we'll have Christmas pudding. And it doesn't quite work

53:02

because I've never managed Christmas pudding. I do like

53:04

Christmas pudding.

53:07

owes it too much fruit. I

53:10

got one year ago a celebrity chef, a guy

53:12

called Anton Mossyman. He came in

53:14

on the program and he brought me in a

53:16

Christmas pudding. and it was an it

53:18

was a mossyman Christmas pudding. And I remember thinking that's nice. So I gave it to my mother and

53:20

I said, well, have that. And we left it three

53:24

years. three years

53:26

before we ate it.

53:28

And no,

53:29

no, fresh. The more booze it's got in it, the

53:31

longer it lives and we

53:33

didn't take the the lid off or anything like that. And

53:35

so what you're supposed to do every year if you

53:37

make your Christmas pudding is well done, but

53:39

you're supposed to make one eat it, and

53:41

then keep one for the following year. The longer you keep it, the better it is. And when we had

53:43

it, it was the most beautiful Christmas pudding

53:45

we'd ever had. But you don't need much of

53:47

it because it's It's

53:49

fruit. what it's full of. Yeah.

53:52

Soaked

53:52

in booze. By Jove.

53:54

Soaked in booze. Poline,

53:58

in a Sartura will be watching my favorite film to share the Holly in the

53:59

Ivy. Great to snuggle down

54:02

with a hot whiskey toffee. Should I've

54:04

never had

54:06

hot whiskey? I've never had hot whiskey, which is old, isn't

54:08

it really? I should have done. I've tried most things

54:10

in my life. And

54:12

Steve, I've just boarded. There's

54:16

Mark Impelli. the 0501 temps link from

54:18

Perley o four twelve Brighton. Towards the

54:20

city and as per the norm, you're

54:22

on via

54:24

the AirPods. We talk about watching

54:26

Karen's Okay YouTube. There's a great series on YouTube called

54:28

Karen's in the wild, mostly American

54:32

Karen's competing about not having to wear a mask and asking for

54:34

the corporate number. Oh, they love it in America.

54:36

They're so thick. These

54:38

carons in

54:40

these shops So he

54:41

said, you need to put on a mask. When were we going

54:43

through the pandemic? No. It's made up. It's false.

54:45

Okay. I'm exempt, and they used to hold these things

54:47

up that they printed on the internet. The

54:49

other thing, have you seen these people? And

54:52

what do they call them? Sovereign

54:54

citizens? Have you ever heard of

54:56

them? These are lunatics. These are

54:58

completely mad people. They've been onto the internet.

55:00

They're all a bit simple. And they

55:02

claim that they don't need

55:04

a driving license for their car because there is

55:06

sovereign citizen. They don't

55:08

need

55:08

it. And they're also you

55:10

you can't stop them. The police can't stop them or

55:12

anything else. They're mad as fruitcakes.

55:15

they really are. There's there's seriously. And they always have people

55:17

to advise them on the telephone. Like, don't get out of the

55:19

car. Don't give the police any information. You don't need to

55:21

give them your name. or anything at

55:24

all sovereign citizens movement.

55:26

They clog up the courts. They're

55:28

completely mad. They really are. They claim

55:30

they're not under the jurors of the government

55:32

to consider themselves exempt from US law.

55:34

They're basically liars. They've been

55:36

they've been because they're so thick. They've

55:38

been federal as garbage on the

55:41

internet. and they turn up. And I

55:43

mean, you know, there's there's all sorts

55:45

of people out there,

55:48

mostly mad. mostly men, and you see them arguing, saying, I'm a

55:50

sovereign citizen. I don't need to answer any of your

55:52

questions. Go away. Leave me alone.

55:54

And the police

55:56

go, sorry? hurry

55:58

I don't think they're in the UK. We we aren't we aren't that mad just But over

56:00

in America, there's loads of them. Loads of

56:02

them. But they're all slightly cracked. You only have

56:04

to look at them to realize they're not the full

56:08

ticket. and and they filmed themselves talking to police say, you can't touch me.

56:10

Get out of the car. I'm not getting out of the

56:12

car. Don't touch me. In the end, they dragged this

56:14

bloke out, towed his car away.

56:17

I laughed. There was

56:19

another woman, get out the car.

56:21

You've got no license. I'm not getting out

56:23

the car.

56:24

So they tasered her. She she fell out of the

56:26

car. I mean, to be honest with you, she was one

56:28

of these idiot. In America, they argue about

56:30

all sorts of things. I'm a sovereign citizen.

56:33

If you if you check them out, you'll realize when you listen

56:35

to their dialogue, mad as a

56:37

fruit bat, I tell you. It's it's

56:39

great stuff. Great. It's great stuff

56:41

to watch, actually. Paul says, Gottblin mode. I must have been in this

56:43

since nineteen seventy. Iceland on a Tuesdays

56:46

like God's waiting room. No. No. No. No.

56:48

No. No.

56:50

No. Well, we have a we have a super duper sized Iceland.

56:52

So you can always get everything. It

56:54

says you can never get any mashed potato. They're

56:56

like bags of gold. No. No.

56:58

R1's full of everything. The only thing I don't

57:01

like about R1, they keep moving all

57:03

the

57:03

stock around. You know, so you go to

57:05

the freezer

57:05

where you thought

57:07

they boost plummeting thing. And you think, well, don't do that. They do it miles

57:10

and spencers. Do you like

57:12

black pudding? No. I've told you before. I'm not gonna tell

57:14

you again, actually. In fact, I'm not gonna

57:16

tell you. I'm gonna tell him and let you let you sweat over

57:18

it. So, anyway, so you've got a

57:20

laddin at

57:22

Christmas. Also,

57:24

The line up was revealed. They've also got,

57:27

by the way, Pokemon,

57:32

detective Pikachu, Shawn

57:34

the

57:34

sheep movie, Farmer

57:36

Geddon and

57:37

Trolls holiday and harmony. There will

57:39

also be classics like when

57:41

Harry met Sally, goodfellas, Mary

57:44

Poppins, and ghostbusters, also

57:47

the Muppet Christmas Carol.

57:50

Muppet Christmas, which actually if you haven't seen

57:52

is great. Muppet Christmas card with Michael Kain. Yeah. People

57:54

love it. It's it's so clever. It's a

57:56

puppet. So in fact, quite a lot of

57:58

puppets. And it's very good. Very, very

57:59

good. So I

58:02

like that. count down to Harry and Meghan's

58:04

dreary boring existence. We

58:06

know the full truth. Yeah. When you

58:08

exaggerated it, dear, because all the

58:10

pictures are

58:12

all fake. You know, the Netflix trailer showing a group of photographers

58:14

running towards a building, but in fact, it

58:16

was it was to wait to see if Katie Price was

58:18

gonna be banged up for her sick drink

58:20

driving offense.

58:22

Luckily, she's disappeared at the moment, so that's that's something to be grateful

58:24

for. And another one was

58:26

that was

58:27

a setup approved

58:29

by Harry archbishop two two's

58:31

residence in Cape Town. They're trying to make out it's all this and that. It's

58:33

bone idled. Bone idled. I've had enough of it. I've

58:35

had enough of it. I've had enough

58:37

of Victoria Beckham. And

58:40

Eva Longoria, God knows she's still around, has a worry, isn't

58:42

it? They were toasting their long

58:45

friendship, wearing their dressing gowns,

58:46

they prepare for a fashion I

58:50

mean, I don't know why Victoria Beckham's not in fashion. She

58:52

might have a shop, but

58:54

didn't sell anything. It's just there,

58:56

so she can go on a fashionista.

58:59

And you go, you've got fifty four million pounds

59:01

in debt to here. How can that be a

59:03

successful business? Even on Goria, they

59:06

haven't shown the desperate housewives program about five hundred years, have

59:08

they loved? Have you done anything else

59:10

recently? I couldn't think of it, but I'm sure you must have

59:12

done something. I see

59:14

that Starmer is

59:16

in a vow to clean the house. He's actually said that the lords and

59:18

move the civil service out of London. Oh,

59:20

there'll be a russian there. Oh, there'll

59:22

be tantrums all over the place. move

59:25

the civil servant, where to? A field

59:27

in end field? I don't know. Where where I mean,

59:30

why can't you leave them where

59:32

they are? Very

59:32

embarrassing, isn't it really? Civil servants moving? They'll be got put

59:35

on moving? Well, we've been in London. We

59:37

are London people, civil servants.

59:40

Russell grounds the astrologer has revealed his eyesight has

59:42

been

59:43

saved after major surgery to remove

59:45

a brain tumor. Good.

59:48

God in heaven. Do you know Russell used to be an actor? Did you know that before

59:50

he became an astronomer?

59:52

Yeah. Or a strollerger.

59:54

A strollermer. Sorry. A strollerger.

59:58

and he did very

1:00:00

well.

1:00:00

He said, truly, his dreamtreat

1:00:02

team, his name that the people who sort

1:00:04

of helped him out, which is very good. And

1:00:06

he says, thank goodness my mom and dad's DNA who

1:00:08

fought the good fight till they were ninety three and

1:00:10

they passed it on to me, bless

1:00:14

his bless his heart. So he's he's good.

1:00:16

He's had the lump removed. He said, I

1:00:18

ended up with bronchitis nearly every

1:00:20

Christmas because he's had recurring illnesses.

1:00:22

Whereas considering

1:00:24

my age, I'm surprised, actually, I seemed

1:00:26

to be doing quite well so far. I was talking to

1:00:28

my driver John this morning, and he's had

1:00:31

some pieces to me. He's had heart attacks and everything. He was

1:00:33

brought back from the dead. Me,

1:00:35

I didn't have, you know, nothing like that at all.

1:00:38

I didn't I

1:00:40

never had He had CPR done on him. He had CPR done he there

1:00:41

where they go, okay, back to everybody stand

1:00:44

back. Like them.

1:00:46

God, the defibrillator. because in the early days,

1:00:49

they only kept defibrillators at the hospital. Now

1:00:51

the ambulances keep them. And I

1:00:54

said, you know, he said so I was in an ambulance and they

1:00:56

were able to

1:00:58

defibrillate me. But I said, well, I've never had that. But he had

1:01:00

seven. Was it yeah. He'd had

1:01:02

seven stents put in. These are these little

1:01:04

spring loaded things that go in

1:01:06

your arteries. when they get furred

1:01:08

up, you put them in there and the blood flows

1:01:10

through. And I said, beat you, I

1:01:12

got eight. I got eight.

1:01:14

And I've got Yeah. Eight

1:01:16

spread around my different archeries. And if if

1:01:18

they get clogged up,

1:01:20

it's like like pipes

1:01:22

coming off your washing machine or something like that, they get

1:01:24

clogged up with far and all all the rest

1:01:26

of it. So at the moment,

1:01:28

really good. Really, really good.

1:01:30

I'm not to not in the toilet. not

1:01:32

in the hall, which is very nice. I think so too coming up to

1:01:34

Christmas, garden heaven. And the boozers

1:01:37

who were trapped In Britain's

1:01:39

highest pub for three nights in a snowstorm have

1:01:42

reunited. This is the Tan Hill

1:01:44

Inn. In the Yorkshiredale, sixty one

1:01:46

people were

1:01:48

stranded there. and they watched an OASIS tribute band

1:01:50

called No OASIS. The

1:01:52

same band played for the reunion, but the

1:01:54

pubs duty

1:01:56

manager, Donna, said as soon as it started snowing, the lead singer jumped in his car got

1:01:58

going. He didn't wanna get caught

1:01:59

again. It is it's the

1:02:01

highest the highest pub,

1:02:04

I believe. and

1:02:05

they had five foot of snow

1:02:07

up there. Five foot of snow. So that's

1:02:09

what we're gonna be getting. That is what we're

1:02:11

getting. Number ten, And since there

1:02:13

aren't enough energy reserves to cope with the cold despite fears of gas shortages and

1:02:15

blackouts early this year, minus

1:02:18

ten, let's say from

1:02:20

six PM They

1:02:22

met

1:02:22

office of issued a warning from six PM tomorrow to nine

1:02:25

AM Monday, Frost and Nice could fall anywhere

1:02:27

in the UK. They're hedging their

1:02:30

bets. So if they say it could fall anywhere,

1:02:32

that means they haven't pinpointed themselves

1:02:34

down. There reckon three million people

1:02:36

will be going to food banks,

1:02:39

for Christmas to getting stuff and now you

1:02:42

know that they'll be able to

1:02:44

sell frozen turkeys as fresh

1:02:46

turkeys this year. I personally don't think it makes

1:02:48

any difference at all. I define

1:02:50

anybody who can tell the difference between a

1:02:52

fresh turkey and a frozen turkey, but some

1:02:54

people like them.

1:02:56

These Copa Turkey is in Copa, I think. And

1:02:58

very expensive, but very nice you

1:03:00

get as Stuart from Sandy says you

1:03:02

can get what you pay for in

1:03:04

every year. every the

1:03:06

coup goes, you know, practically round

1:03:08

Twickenham as people are queuing up to

1:03:10

get his his turkeys and his fresh

1:03:13

fish and everything else. It's really it really he

1:03:15

does very well. Terry and Freuden says, we have

1:03:17

an equivalent to sovereign citizens in this country.

1:03:20

They call themselves Freeman of

1:03:22

the land freeman of the land. Wow.

1:03:24

And Stella said, did you say

1:03:26

that Moody's making out that nobody's going for a

1:03:28

Christmas single?

1:03:30

such

1:03:30

as I also expressed surprise because Citi doesn't

1:03:32

talk. It doesn't actually speak. So

1:03:34

to you know, he doesn't. Sweep just

1:03:38

squeaks. but

1:03:38

he's he's going for the Christmas single. So he might

1:03:40

be he's also in

1:03:41

pantomime this year with Jason Donovan,

1:03:44

sutti's

1:03:45

sweep and sue, the rest

1:03:47

of the game. Yeah. I mean, put it this way, such he is seventy five

1:03:49

is still going. Tell you who else is

1:03:52

still going?

1:03:54

Tommy Cannon. Tommy Cannon

1:03:56

of Cannonball fame because

1:03:58

Bobby Ball died of COVID

1:04:02

problems. And Tommy Cannon, excuse

1:04:04

me, out there now, doing

1:04:07

panto, singing their song.

1:04:09

love me, a love, sing me, you know, and he's

1:04:12

doing

1:04:12

really well. He's he's in his eighties, I

1:04:14

think. And he's done really well. I

1:04:15

started following the other day, so he followed me

1:04:18

back. So that was quite nice. Why not?

1:04:20

Listen, I thought they were they were good fun,

1:04:22

very good fun. Conrad says, I love

1:04:24

Christmas pudding with cream, but I can only eat

1:04:26

late afternoon or evening after

1:04:28

Christmas lunch. Ma'am used to

1:04:30

bring out Christmas pudding for the family friends. To Brazil,

1:04:32

all very happy. Oh. And

1:04:34

John says, what model rolls Royce?

1:04:38

Oh, I can't remember actually. I can picture it now. It was I think

1:04:40

I can't remember. I can't

1:04:42

remember. It was blue. I just remember it

1:04:45

was dark blue. It says, how

1:04:47

does it compare? Well, Bentley's you drive, Rolls's

1:04:50

you're driven in. It's as simple

1:04:52

as that. That's how

1:04:54

it works. So that is

1:04:56

the difference. So if if you end up

1:04:58

with a Rolls Royce, you're expecting a

1:05:00

chauffeur to turn up. And if you have

1:05:02

a Bentley, you know, be it in a naj or whatever, I've got continental

1:05:04

flying spur. They're meant to be driven.

1:05:06

And I I quite like driving them as

1:05:08

well. I've had, you know, about nine.

1:05:12

you know, over the years, I've had quite a few. It's color I go

1:05:14

for. It's color. I don't know why. I

1:05:16

never used to be particularly I look

1:05:19

the time. I know you should be fussy about color, but I am

1:05:21

now.

1:05:21

Steve, hello, on LVC,

1:05:24

text 84850

1:05:26

Bobbing,

1:05:26

nice, Debbie company, Debbie company. Not

1:05:30

Steve, what's your view on the ULEZ

1:05:32

extension? Doesn't affect

1:05:34

me? My

1:05:35

car is exempt. actually.

1:05:38

But it says that time delivery is struggling to

1:05:40

heat and heat, and they're gonna charge twelve fifty a day

1:05:42

or left to change the car. People can't

1:05:44

afford it. Yeah. I know. I know. But

1:05:47

I mean, that's they but they've always penalized the motorists. Nothing new. You

1:05:49

know, if in doubt, what do you get them

1:05:51

for? Get them for speeding. get

1:05:53

for Get them for the congestion charge. Just

1:05:56

get them. Easy peasy, but

1:05:57

I'm exempt from you less. I have to pay the

1:06:00

congestion congestion charge charge.

1:06:02

So,

1:06:02

you know, I'm I only bring the car into town one day

1:06:04

a week. That's all I do,

1:06:06

which is good. And and it's it

1:06:08

you know, you say people can't afford it. strangely,

1:06:12

they seem to find the money.

1:06:14

They seem to find the money. You know,

1:06:16

it's people say, oh, you know, it's Christmas. So

1:06:18

people go, you should have

1:06:20

been in London Saturday, and every

1:06:22

day this week, it is rammed

1:06:24

with people. Well, they're not just

1:06:26

wandering up there to look at the lights because the lights

1:06:28

weren't on. They they were

1:06:30

in and out of the shops. People have to

1:06:32

stagger around with a recession.

1:06:34

Hello. What recession? Everybody's out

1:06:36

there buying stuff. You know, all the shops are doing well. Admittedly, it's the banks are

1:06:38

closing. You know, we've just got

1:06:40

Barclays closing HSBC is just about

1:06:42

to close. That will just leave

1:06:44

us with Lloyd's.

1:06:46

I can go to Richmond and I can go

1:06:48

to NatWest Bank, which I shall have

1:06:50

to, I think, when we get paid next

1:06:52

time round. But but the rest of the time, there's no banks

1:06:54

anyway. Everybody's doing internet

1:06:56

banking. So when you say, you know, people are

1:06:58

having to sort of, you know, change their cup,

1:07:00

they're not changing their car, they're

1:07:02

finding the money. I don't

1:07:04

know where they're finding it from. I've really got I've

1:07:06

got no idea. Really

1:07:08

got no idea. It's

1:07:10

very embarrassing. Salted caramel ice creamy, and

1:07:12

please, salted caramel. I can't I the

1:07:14

the chocolate is very nice, but my wine is

1:07:16

rich. In

1:07:18

case you're a new listener to the program, we have ice cream delivered. We'd

1:07:20

probably get it about, on

1:07:22

average, about once a week. from

1:07:25

ice

1:07:25

cream, Ian, who delivers to all the

1:07:28

theaters in London ice cream. It's

1:07:30

always hard and does, and we get a choice. We are

1:07:32

to get vanilla. strawberries and

1:07:34

cream,

1:07:34

salted

1:07:35

caramel, or double

1:07:38

chocolate. There's only little

1:07:38

pots but by Joe Vitelli, goes

1:07:41

down a treat. It goes down a treat. You can always

1:07:44

twist my arm with a little ice cream in the morning

1:07:46

because if you've been chatting for three hours,

1:07:48

I quite like the worst thing

1:07:50

for me It's trying to fit it

1:07:52

in with the outbreaks because it's rock hard the ice cream. It seriously is. I think it must

1:07:54

have a temperature down. It's so

1:07:56

cold and I sort of

1:07:58

try and try and get it,

1:07:59

but it'll be it'll be very nice today and very

1:08:02

much appreciated. Lewis,

1:08:04

Zenux Bridge, Saikivian, went

1:08:07

to Ancels, garden center in

1:08:08

West Tryton. Have you been? No.

1:08:10

No. Never heard

1:08:10

of it. I go I go to

1:08:14

not cuts. I used to go to Adrian Hall, but that's

1:08:16

closed now, which is a bit

1:08:18

of a shame. And from Ash,

1:08:21

who says, I

1:08:22

hope you're feeling fine and fast and what the fuss is all about expensive

1:08:24

turkeys. They all end up ex turkeys.

1:08:26

Don't they? Mine is supplied by

1:08:29

the world renowned

1:08:32

Bernard Matthews. Yeah. I mean, they're you can buy

1:08:34

the frozen turkey. They've been available for ages. The funny thing is people just think it's Christmas, don't they? They go,

1:08:38

oh, Turkey's Christmas, but you can have Tokyo year round. It's not just a

1:08:41

seasonal thing at all. Have you tried

1:08:43

Costco mince pies, extra large,

1:08:45

and sponge over the mince makes him a bit different, but nice. Now I'm

1:08:47

going out to get

1:08:51

today. I'm

1:08:53

going to get What am I getting?

1:08:55

Morrisons mince pies with cream? I've definitely got

1:08:57

to try

1:08:58

them. They they look absolutely delicious. So

1:09:02

Steve, my great grandmother made her own Christmas

1:09:04

pudding. We'll look forward, and she died in seventy

1:09:06

two. We bought pudding after that, not the same. No.

1:09:08

My mom used to make Christmas pudding as well.

1:09:10

In fact, if you were very lucky. In our house, you were allowed

1:09:12

to stir the Christmas pudding. She put all the

1:09:14

ingredients to the bowl and you then stirred

1:09:18

it to, oh, yeah. Very good. Here in Norfolk, says

1:09:20

Stu, first frost of

1:09:22

the year, roll on spring.

1:09:25

another long wait. Sandra

1:09:27

says had my tea towel delivered really

1:09:29

lovely and bright. What a design is

1:09:31

great. Thank you.

1:09:32

Thank you. We've done we've done

1:09:34

very, very well with selling the the

1:09:36

tea towels and money raise going to a very, very,

1:09:38

very good cause. Royal Mail in Crunch talks

1:09:43

to bin the strike. And the Royal Mailer previously said its

1:09:45

best and final offer is worth up to

1:09:48

nine percent. Nine percent

1:09:50

they all want more, I'm

1:09:52

afraid. and they

1:09:54

are prepared to urgently meet to discuss the details. So far, the strike action

1:09:57

is the ninth

1:10:00

of December eleven, fourteen, fifteen,

1:10:02

twenty three, and twenty four basically, they've screwed Christmas. Basically, they've screwed Christmas

1:10:04

because, you know, if you haven't

1:10:06

got anything in by the ninth,

1:10:10

It's gonna take them a long long while to catch up with the backlog and

1:10:12

so the whole thing gets a bit complicated. Looking at

1:10:14

a picture of the of the sinks and

1:10:18

the

1:10:18

pyramids. The syncs is, you know, still there. Knows still off. But the size of the pyramids, when you

1:10:20

think, oh my god. I mean, it's just

1:10:22

enormous, but do go to YouTube. You wanna

1:10:27

what they look like inside, they put in a walkway. So you can see

1:10:29

all the bits. I

1:10:30

mean, how they built these things? Gordon

1:10:33

Lown knows. And seriously, they're just it's amazing

1:10:36

to look at, very nice.

1:10:38

An amateur astronomer, James Flanagan,

1:10:41

has captured images,

1:10:44

incredible images On his telescope, far far away, you see

1:10:46

in the rings of Saturn, the

1:10:47

ice caps of Mars and

1:10:50

Mountains on He says

1:10:52

his telescope is quite ordinary, and he can he

1:10:54

said anybody can witness wonders such as the Orion Nebula without

1:10:58

the price he kit. Wow. He's he's a furthest he's

1:11:01

away is Markarian's chain,

1:11:03

a set of galaxies,

1:11:05

fifty five million

1:11:07

light years away. He can

1:11:09

see these.

1:11:10

So the light that formed that image left just after the dinosaurs went extinct.

1:11:16

That amazing. Absolutely amazing. Also, building work

1:11:18

began yesterday in the world's largest radio telescope.

1:11:20

Thirty years of planning has

1:11:22

gone into this one. It's called

1:11:25

the kilometer array. It's got two hundred dishes and

1:11:27

a hundred and thirty one thousand

1:11:29

poll antennas on remote sites

1:11:31

in South Africa. and

1:11:35

Australia. There you go. It's one

1:11:37

of the world's largest radio telescopes.

1:11:40

Oh, it's unbelievably clever. I

1:11:42

really do actually. I think that

1:11:45

just amazing. I wouldn't I wouldn't know what to

1:11:47

do. I'm seeing one. Didn't they use one on something? Come on, what it was. Oh, here we go. TV

1:11:49

personality and mother, this

1:11:51

is Stacey Solomon. That's

1:11:54

the one in married Joe's Swash, the one with a

1:11:56

funny hair, you know, which looks like it's come out of a bottle or a

1:11:58

a spray can or something it looks like. It just looks a slight

1:12:03

odd. Also, they've if you wanna

1:12:05

veg out this Christmas, they've done a whole list

1:12:07

of all the veggie sandwiches that

1:12:09

you can get in

1:12:11

all the supermarkets. If you are not a

1:12:13

a person who eats meat, then you can get all these plant

1:12:16

based things. I

1:12:18

personally really couldn't give stuff either

1:12:21

day. Vegan Turkey free and stuffing baguette from,

1:12:23

let's say, from where, actually? Oh, from Greg's. from

1:12:27

Greg's, which will be proving very popular, I should imagine.

1:12:29

And Kerry Cattoner, apparently, is back

1:12:31

in hospital. So so they say,

1:12:33

they're difficult. She's bit of a

1:12:36

drama queen. She said, oh, I've got

1:12:38

these pains going on. So she goes back to her plastic surgeon. I really don't know why you're bothering me

1:12:40

dear. It's, you know, it's one of those. So every

1:12:42

time you reach, you've gone back to the plastic

1:12:44

surgeon. and

1:12:46

then names him. You all think to yourself, III

1:12:49

Have you tried McDonald's hot

1:12:51

chocolate drink one

1:12:54

twenty nine? No. I haven't attached it. It's always

1:12:56

nice and really super hot,

1:12:58

much, you know, fairly good.

1:13:01

Beats, cholesterol,

1:13:04

all Starbucks. I had one the other day from Where

1:13:06

did I get it

1:13:06

from? I can't remember, but it was nice. It came with cream, but the cream that they use in all of

1:13:10

the coffee shops is that sort of fake cream. You can buy a tin of

1:13:13

it in the supermarkets. You spray it. It's

1:13:15

it's full of air

1:13:17

and it's not really thick cream at all because if you put it

1:13:19

on top of your hot chocolate, it just melts into

1:13:22

it. That's not proper cream.

1:13:23

That's very cream.

1:13:25

the three crime not proper cream.

1:13:27

It's wet. It's whipped cream. It's sort of and they

1:13:29

put it in that thing and they keep it in the fridge, and

1:13:31

they squirt it on top. It looks good. You it

1:13:33

there. Five minutes later, look at it, it all

1:13:35

would have dissolved the before you've little bit of a disappointment.

1:13:37

Little bit of a disappointment. But I

1:13:39

like a hot chocolate. I

1:13:43

like a hot chocolate. You know, look at they're they're fairly

1:13:45

nice. Not not obviously

1:13:47

for diabetics, I

1:13:49

wouldn't really have one. you know, on a

1:13:51

regular basis. I have them every so often at once

1:13:54

in a once in a blue moon. It's like

1:13:56

all sorts of other things.

1:13:58

What did I have the other day, which I haven't had for

1:14:00

ages? I had a sorry.

1:14:02

I had a double sausage and

1:14:05

egg mcmuffin. And I eat it on the train, and I

1:14:07

felt a little bit decadent, but it's always the way with me. If I eat it, I then think

1:14:09

afterwards I shouldn't

1:14:11

have eaten that. I

1:14:13

shouldn't have eaten that. It's just

1:14:15

not good for me. But occasional treat,

1:14:17

but, you know, I mean, like, really

1:14:20

really occasional. So Adele's

1:14:22

boyfriend, he's a nice little pizza worker's name. His name's Rich Paul.

1:14:24

And He

1:14:28

went livid at somebody who tried to sell her

1:14:30

a car. Obviously, a nasty little piece of work. So try that

1:14:33

one again, matey. Otherwise,

1:14:35

you find yourself in in

1:14:37

a terrible situation. Terrible situation. We're trying to find out which paper I was you

1:14:39

know, I find stories. I go

1:14:42

through the papers every

1:14:44

morning. And he says how long does

1:14:46

it take to go through the papers? And to be honest with you, it takes no more than ten minutes to go through every single And

1:14:48

I think we

1:14:51

find every single one of

1:14:53

the of the really really good stories because there are stories that you run-in the

1:14:56

papers and and then there are

1:14:58

stories. I mean, you know, at the

1:15:00

moment, you

1:15:03

go through the Daily Start and it's just pages and pages of

1:15:05

football. Well, you know, I work on the

1:15:07

assumption that you might not

1:15:09

enjoy me talking about football, so I don't

1:15:11

bother. and I can't really talk about it. Can I really? David Williams having a

1:15:13

last hurrah on Britain's got talent.

1:15:16

The comedian's back on the

1:15:17

judging panel for the show's

1:15:20

magic special. but that's his final

1:15:22

appearance. And what did they say the other day? I think Steven Mulhern, they reckon

1:15:24

he makes about two

1:15:27

thousand pounds a day. Because

1:15:29

there's a new program coming up December the eighteenth, it's called Britain's got talent, the

1:15:31

ultimate magician hosted by,

1:15:36

of course, Steven

1:15:37

Malhern because he is the ultimate magician. He's very,

1:15:39

very good. He's a very, very, very good magician. I

1:15:41

don't think people realize, but he's

1:15:43

done no end of of

1:15:48

of magic programs. And this one's got

1:15:50

all sorts of people on Elijio Dixen

1:15:52

and Mad Holden and Pen

1:15:54

Gillette. from pen and telephone. But and

1:15:56

then people writing to the star saying Bexam's

1:15:58

a hypocrite for the green flight. He flew

1:16:00

over to Boston for the World Cup.

1:16:02

for

1:16:03

the earth shot

1:16:04

do. Can't be very green. Well, he isn't.

1:16:06

He isn't pretty quick to he's only

1:16:08

there to just trail some money. That's

1:16:10

all he cared. He didn't care about anything.

1:16:12

know, from Qatar. He really

1:16:14

doesn't care. Steve Malone,

1:16:15

on LVC. Calling nice to be company, it

1:16:17

trusts you well if

1:16:19

if not cold. We are

1:16:21

absolutely freezing at the moment. Fashion House Dior. Of the perfect present

1:16:24

to run off

1:16:26

any extra mince pies, It's

1:16:29

a treadmill. They're selling a treadmill. I don't know why they'll

1:16:31

be selling a treadmill, but it's twelve thousand pounds. Describe

1:16:35

the limit describe the limited edition elegant, user friendly, intuitive, and

1:16:37

quiet. It's a treadmill love. It's

1:16:39

a treadmill. Don't get too

1:16:41

carried away with it. It's

1:16:43

a treadmill. Okay? It's there for people

1:16:45

who can't be bothered to go to a gymnasium, which is interesting. Dawn

1:16:48

French is convinced

1:16:50

the queen used a skateboard

1:16:53

because she couldn't get over how quickly the late monarch moved around.

1:16:55

That's an old gag from years ago. People used to joke about the

1:16:59

queen mother used to escape ball to get around house, which of course she didn't,

1:17:01

but people used to people used to like

1:17:03

saying things like that. The there

1:17:06

was it was also the

1:17:08

old because it will always said

1:17:10

the Queen mother's staff were all gay. All gay. She enjoyed employing people

1:17:12

and they enjoyed working for

1:17:14

the Queen mother. I'm not every

1:17:17

single one was gay, but the majority were gay. And there was always that

1:17:19

old line of the queen mother when she was sitting there and she'd pushed the bell a

1:17:21

few times and nobody

1:17:23

had come in and says she

1:17:25

went to the door, opened it, and shouted down the corridor. When you all queens are finished out there, there's no

1:17:27

queen there, one said

1:17:31

gin and dubonnet, alpha thought was a

1:17:33

great line to use actually. I can imagine actually what it must be nice. She'd have been

1:17:35

she'd been quite a

1:17:39

good interview actually. I'd love to have loves

1:17:41

to have spoken to her. Pru Lee, for his venture, have you seen that program's

1:17:44

being advertised on an intelligent

1:17:46

woman who has donated her body?

1:17:49

to television so they can dissect

1:17:51

it after she died. Have you seen this pro I I haven't actually

1:17:52

watched

1:17:56

the program But I kind of

1:17:58

get a bit freaked out about these sort of things. She wanted so that people knew

1:17:59

how people's bodies

1:18:02

worked, and she died. of

1:18:05

something, but she they

1:18:08

they're going to dissect her body on

1:18:10

television. And she died of cancer. And

1:18:13

This is a name is Tony Cruz. She died of tear gland cancer at the age of thirty. She was

1:18:15

the only name person to be

1:18:18

publicly dissected an aid of cancer

1:18:20

research. I

1:18:23

mean, I'd I'd never heard it before. She hoped her donation would

1:18:26

aid in

1:18:26

cancer research. They hope the program

1:18:28

will educate millions and keep her

1:18:30

memory alive. I think so too.

1:18:33

They're going to dissect around how much of

1:18:35

it they're to you, don't show autopsy at the moment. She had a rare

1:18:38

eye cancer. I'd never even heard of an eye

1:18:40

cancer. But

1:18:43

she donated body to medical science, and she hoped

1:18:46

that the scientists could continue an investigation

1:18:50

into the deadly disease. I don't know how much they're going to show you.

1:18:52

They do do bits they show you at the

1:18:54

motorola television, but they don't show you all topses.

1:18:59

You get to see some bits where they've opened somebody up and they're sort of doing

1:19:01

a heart valve or something like that. Whether or not they're gonna

1:19:03

show you what is

1:19:06

tantamount from autopsy, I don't know. I mean, that's, you know, a lot of people

1:19:09

won't have seen dead people. And

1:19:11

I've seen some of the

1:19:14

some of the little

1:19:16

clips where she's on the

1:19:18

on a a Gurney and you can see her feet and everything else. I'm thinking, how much are

1:19:20

they going to show? Because

1:19:22

every time they they show these

1:19:26

sort of programs, they don't show you somebody's face because it's, you know, what what goes on

1:19:28

in the autopsy room, as

1:19:30

far as I'm concerned, should stay

1:19:34

in the autopsy room. Imagine, I've always said, you

1:19:37

know, when I'm when I'm dead, you can take whatever

1:19:39

bits of me you want. I couldn't care

1:19:41

less. There made any difference to me. Pete

1:19:44

says pre gym chocolate binge

1:19:46

special. It says it's Christmas.

1:19:49

I've ate outdoor pools to service today, so I need

1:19:52

the calories. So he sent us in a

1:19:54

picture. We got the picture of of Pete

1:19:56

today, pre

1:19:58

gym chocolate was

1:19:59

it binge

1:19:59

special? Honestly, look at Oh, that you are

1:20:02

oh, oh, they look quite. I see. I've

1:20:04

I've had Reese's, I think. and he's got the

1:20:07

dairy milk. You should be as big as

1:20:09

a small bungalow. You

1:20:11

really should. Is it Yeah.

1:20:14

The snowman's quite nice, chocolate snowman. chocolate

1:20:16

stoma, a quite good fun actually. Thank

1:20:18

you, Pete. So eight outdoor pools, but cold

1:20:21

in it for pools today. unless they're heated, in which case you could probably

1:20:23

jump in at the same time. Dani in up a

1:20:26

clapton says, Steve, good morning. I've had a Christmas

1:20:28

putting in the cupboard for

1:20:30

four years, ran out November twenty

1:20:32

two, but

1:20:33

I will still eat it. It runs out in November

1:20:35

twenty two. Oh, it's run out. Alright. Let's say, oh god. No. It's only a little bit That's easy. He said, I'm amazed how long

1:20:37

his shelf life is. If they've got booze

1:20:39

in, only if they've

1:20:43

got booze in, do they have long shelf life? If

1:20:45

they don't have booze in short

1:20:47

shelf life. Thirty

1:20:50

five degrees says Harry,

1:20:52

in Brisbane, on the

1:20:54

beach, simply love. AC is well and truly a

1:20:57

see as well and truly in

1:21:00

my bedroom layer on. I think that's air conditioning. I

1:21:02

like it. I love air conditioning. I love I live

1:21:06

in air conditioning. My car air conditioning all the time. Although and

1:21:08

I suddenly realized why some of my cars in

1:21:10

the morning, some of my luxury cars are

1:21:13

freezing cold. It's

1:21:15

because they're electric. And if they put the

1:21:17

heating on, it drinks

1:21:18

the electric in these cars. So consequently, I sit

1:21:20

in the car. It's so cold. I've had to

1:21:22

say, you can put the heating on. And

1:21:26

they

1:21:26

don't like to do it, that they don't put the

1:21:28

air conditioning on. So in summer, we're likely to

1:21:30

sweat a lot. David and Not GM shares that

1:21:32

I saw Succi and Pantou a few years ago,

1:21:34

he was fab very accurate with the water pistol. Sweep made a

1:21:37

surprise appearance too driving onto the stage

1:21:39

in city's Campavan and then

1:21:41

performing his rendition of Nessus

1:21:43

and Dorma, priceless

1:21:44

Yes. I like that. Steve, in

1:21:46

an extended large family, what should you say

1:21:49

to members that

1:21:52

do nothing? the ones that just

1:21:54

come to eat, not pay or contribute, and then eat the most. My poor wife and kids have to clean up everybody's

1:21:56

gone and dealing with a food bill, a

1:21:58

threat of inflicted inflicted inflicted quid. Don't invite

1:22:00

them. Don't

1:22:03

invite them. Move. Move. Just

1:22:04

don't tell the

1:22:05

way you've moved to. You don't want

1:22:08

people like

1:22:08

that coming in your house. And also,

1:22:10

if somebody comes in for Christmas lunch, you're not really

1:22:12

expecting them to pay, are you? That's whole idea

1:22:14

of Christmas lunch. And I'm having two

1:22:16

this year. and I won't be paying

1:22:19

for either of them. Well, I mean, probably inadvertently, I might be. And Steve, texting

1:22:21

to say goodbye says

1:22:24

true d. as

1:22:26

I'm going to Saint

1:22:29

Helena on Thursday,

1:22:32

and she says I'm going to

1:22:34

visit my son who's a paramedic over

1:22:36

there. And she said, I'd be very

1:22:38

impressed if you know where Saint Helena is. Hello, are you mad?

1:22:40

Of

1:22:40

course, I know

1:22:43

where Saint Helena is. I

1:22:45

mean, you know, it's it's famous. On

1:22:47

this program, it's very very famous. And the reason which

1:22:51

will become apparent is that it's

1:22:53

the overseas territory, which is in the South Atlantic Ocean. And it's

1:22:55

got a postcode. It's got a

1:22:57

UK postcode. Did you

1:23:00

know that? There you go.

1:23:02

The sovereign state is, of course, the United Kingdom. And and it's it's very nice.

1:23:07

It's very nice. And so if

1:23:09

you go Saint Elena, then there's a sentient island and Tristan DeCunha. There you go.

1:23:12

You see? And the

1:23:14

mind of useless information, all

1:23:16

the stupid

1:23:18

things that people never ever sort of expect

1:23:20

you to. But she says, I'll I'll see you

1:23:22

in the New Year. You know, you can take

1:23:24

your phone with you and pick up LBC. You

1:23:26

do know that, don't you? You do know that can go say overseas

1:23:29

and not here LVC. You just

1:23:31

have to go and

1:23:32

download the global player

1:23:33

app onto your phone, cost

1:23:36

you nothing, or head

1:23:37

to global player dot com, download the app, then you can listen to LBC and all of those

1:23:40

fabulous podcasts. You won't

1:23:42

need to miss anything at

1:23:44

all. seriously,

1:23:46

that's the whole idea of it. It's

1:23:49

wonderful.

1:23:49

And Dan

1:23:50

says my dead body

1:23:52

documentary was on last night. They

1:23:55

show everything. It's not for everyone, but very interesting. You say I'm not sure about that.

1:23:57

I mean, I have seen dead bodies before. It's not

1:23:59

that I haven't seen them

1:24:02

because I used to work His needs to go in a department store,

1:24:04

and they had their own funeral

1:24:06

director within the department store. And

1:24:08

on a couple of occasions,

1:24:11

we did go down and helped them. They

1:24:13

they were short staffed, and we helped them lift somebody

1:24:15

out of a polypropylene coffin to put

1:24:17

them onto the table in the

1:24:19

chapel of rest. only

1:24:21

the one time. Only the one time. And

1:24:23

there was always a smell associated with the chapel of

1:24:25

rest. I could always smell

1:24:28

it now. But

1:24:30

in fact, there's a coffee manufacturer. I think co op manufacturer on so not gonna

1:24:32

be turning out coffins.

1:24:35

What do we do? In

1:24:38

theory, you don't have to be buried in a coffin. You can be buried in a body bag just burying

1:24:40

somebody or failing

1:24:43

that if it's of

1:24:46

cremation. You could just burn the whole bag,

1:24:48

I would have thought. You know, you could do it

1:24:50

so much cheaper than they charge at the moment,

1:24:53

but mean, I'm I'm not bothered. You know how

1:24:55

they get rid of me. Well, for a funeral, yeah, you might. But I

1:24:57

mean, to be honest with you, you can get baskets and stuff like that. Now

1:24:59

you don't have you

1:25:03

have to have a a wooden coffin. I was so excited

1:25:05

when I heard you say they live

1:25:07

longer with booze. says

1:25:10

Kathy, two bottles of both Korean and

1:25:12

I realize you were talking about Christmas pudding,

1:25:14

not humans, so I don't know. Greg's

1:25:17

Christmas shortbread Steve topped

1:25:19

with caramel and white chocolate. A real treat with

1:25:21

a hot drink says Lawrence. And the autopsy Steve was on last night, and

1:25:23

they showed her face and dissection clue. He was done

1:25:25

very well, including the woman being interviewed before

1:25:27

her death and so

1:25:30

on. Now that the coffin maker says David are going out on strike. I wonder if IKEA,

1:25:32

we're bringing out a

1:25:35

build your own kit. Yes,

1:25:38

I don't see one. You know, it's very difficult to

1:25:40

actually go and buy a coffin

1:25:42

yourself. They'll sell

1:25:43

to funeral directors, but

1:25:45

you try getting a coffee manufacturer to sell

1:25:48

to you, you would be better off going for

1:25:50

a you're right. Somebody could get a kit

1:25:52

out and you could probably

1:25:54

make it yourself. Very difficult. to

1:25:56

actually get hold of these things. Could you get some

1:25:58

people? 011 woman was a man no to man. And he had his coffin

1:26:02

in his sitting room And he said, that's the coffin buried in. I

1:26:05

thought, wow. Very, very big of

1:26:07

you, I think, actually. Steve,

1:26:10

says, Christine, my twenty year old has asked this his birthday on the twenty

1:26:13

second. I bought it yesterday. Is

1:26:15

it a good aftershave? I

1:26:17

wouldn't

1:26:17

have the

1:26:20

faintest idea. I wouldn't. Yes. It's

1:26:22

it's our Marni, so it's probably cost you a a few pounds, I

1:26:24

should imagine,

1:26:28

sixty quids. Christine, was that something

1:26:30

like that? I'm

1:26:31

using a new one from Creed, and it's called silver

1:26:36

water, I think something like that, which is a new one,

1:26:38

which is very nice, which I use all the time now.

1:26:40

I said, I'm going for it.

1:26:43

I still use creative dentists. but

1:26:45

creed is so expansive. It really is you can't walk creed

1:26:47

245A

1:26:51

bottle.

1:26:53

But it's not the most expensive after shave. A friend of

1:26:55

mine, Warren, I think showed me an after shave. He sent me details of an

1:26:57

after shave online that was six

1:26:59

hundred quitter bottle. I

1:27:03

can't

1:27:03

imagine six hundred pounds per bottle of after

1:27:05

shave. I mean, I don't know what it

1:27:07

was. It looked very nice. Yeah.

1:27:09

Have a look. just find I mean, I

1:27:11

should imagine just type in most expensive after

1:27:13

shave. Whatever. I mean, I should

1:27:15

imagine creed is probably up there. They

1:27:17

do quite a range of creed and they

1:27:19

do different packs different ones in the little ones like

1:27:21

in little sort of test tubes and stuff

1:27:23

like that. But I'm sure it's about

1:27:25

six hundred quid a bottle for this

1:27:28

other stuff. that

1:27:30

Warren came up with. Most expensive Cologne in the world. There we go. But

1:27:32

I'm even more expensive

1:27:35

than I imagine actually. That's

1:27:38

it. Yeah. I think these have taken it

1:27:40

to a new level. This is Clive

1:27:42

Christians Imperial Majesty perfume. It's wait

1:27:44

for this. You couldn't even guess this

1:27:46

one. For a sixteen point nine ounce

1:27:48

bottle, it's four hundred and thirty

1:27:50

five thousand dollars. Harvey'd seriously

1:27:54

come on. That'll be just a little tiny dab. Cloud Christian's number

1:27:56

one, which is two thousand one hundred

1:27:58

and fifty per one ounce bottle. Must

1:28:01

get cheaper.

1:28:01

k. k. Let's find

1:28:04

something in Creek. There you go. Creed

1:28:06

Aventus. Now that's one thousand and fifty five dollars for a sixteen

1:28:08

point nine

1:28:11

ounce bottle. So it's the third most expensive bottle. I have

1:28:13

Credive ventus. Rooker, one

1:28:16

thousand

1:28:17

and fifty, Okay. What's

1:28:19

that one? That's a pretty box.

1:28:21

Isn't it a thousand pound for a one

1:28:23

ounce bottle? Who's it? What's that? for

1:28:26

men. And it's a beautiful bottle, isn't

1:28:29

it? That's very nice. Here's one.

1:28:31

There you go. This is Tom

1:28:33

Ford's eight hundred and sixty dollars.

1:28:35

It's rapidly turning cheaper. I could tell

1:28:37

you here, eight hundred and sixty

1:28:39

an one number nine,

1:28:43

shaken not stirred.

1:28:45

might

1:28:46

have to do the rest after the break. That's amazing, isn't it?

1:28:48

I didn't realize that they it's that four

1:28:50

hundred and thirty five thousand dollar one. I

1:28:53

mean, what in gold's name? That is just so

1:28:55

expensive. So expensive.

1:28:56

Leading Britain's conversation,

1:29:00

LBC, with Steve

1:29:02

Hallum. Following

1:29:03

every twelve minute two six and made

1:29:05

my year. Said Trudy, what was I thinking?

1:29:07

Of course, you

1:29:08

knew where Saint Helena is.

1:29:10

Yes. It's where Napoleon was exiled.

1:29:13

I mean, that's the most famous part of it.

1:29:15

That's the most famous part of it. Also, the world's oldest tortures. Well, I think just died. I seem to remember I

1:29:18

did that some time ago, actually.

1:29:19

My daughter Steve,

1:29:23

who lives in Australia and

1:29:23

my son from Surrey, recently visited

1:29:26

me here in Ireland. We

1:29:28

ate out a lot, especially

1:29:30

in the hills and mountains of I

1:29:32

finished almost every meal with an Irish coffee without the

1:29:34

Irish. I don't like whiskey, but that drink was beautiful. A good serving of real

1:29:36

poured cream that sat proudly. Gotta

1:29:38

pour it over the back of

1:29:41

spoon. Having I've done it a few

1:29:43

times, you haven't remarked yet my many gay friends, one of whom was Billy, which was Billy

1:29:45

Talon who worked for the

1:29:48

queen mother. And

1:29:51

this is where it changes. You

1:29:53

can see Billy Talon because

1:29:56

there's a picture

1:29:58

on YouTube, a

1:29:58

little bit of footage. Princess

1:29:59

Margaret was outside, and he lent over and

1:30:02

said something to her. She was in a

1:30:04

wheelchair with dark glasses on it.

1:30:06

She was obviously too wave to people as they went past. But anyway,

1:30:08

that was neither here nor there. He was

1:30:10

the favorite servant to the queen mother.

1:30:14

When she died, He was ousted so fast. You can't believe

1:30:17

it. They they didn't. They don't want you

1:30:19

anymore in the royal family. It's funny.

1:30:21

Once once you've sort of

1:30:23

served your your purpose, They

1:30:26

don't want you again. So he'd collected various bits and pieces, and of

1:30:27

course, he'd been gifted them by the Queen mother, the Queen mother had

1:30:29

given him all these things. And

1:30:31

he was horrified. but

1:30:35

he should have realized and, you know, I don't think people do

1:30:37

realize, does that streak within the royal family?

1:30:39

It's like, if

1:30:42

you remember, the Queen mother didn't sorry, the the queen didn't cry

1:30:44

when Diana died, but yet when they

1:30:46

took away Britannia, the royal yacht,

1:30:50

she cried. They have

1:30:51

different different values, different things, and they

1:30:53

get rid of they get rid

1:30:55

of

1:30:55

servants left right and center.

1:30:58

You remember crawl fee, who looked after the queen, the very young queen and

1:31:00

Margaret, she happened to write an article. She'd

1:31:02

been with them for for ages for years.

1:31:06

Marion Crawford and she wrote an article for a magazine saying

1:31:08

how adorable they were in everything

1:31:10

else. They fired her instantly. She

1:31:15

devoted a lifetime a lifetime. She was the mouthpiece of

1:31:17

the queen. They got rid of her, and she ended up her days sad and

1:31:20

lonely. And they used to pass her

1:31:22

house at Christmas. It was near Sandringham, I

1:31:24

think. and they never

1:31:26

spoke to her ever again. That's how they can do it. So when they sort of cut off

1:31:32

and Andrew, have no compunction with this

1:31:34

whatsoever. It's a case of the I mean, I think that Charles will probably go through parliament,

1:31:36

and they will demote

1:31:39

Harry and his wife and

1:31:41

they won't have any titles or anything else.

1:31:43

They become, know, who sort persona Andrew, especially, especially. Did

1:31:45

you see I read

1:31:48

a little story.

1:31:50

Nobody's mentioned it in any of the

1:31:52

papers. There was a picture of a ball ball. And it

1:31:54

was quite nice hatcher, and it was at the

1:31:56

queen. with,

1:31:59

I

1:31:59