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Steve Allen on LVC.

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the whole show.

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This is LVC from

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global, leading Britain's conversation.

0:56

With Steve Allen. Molly of really Wednesday,

0:59

December the fourteenth, are you well?

1:01

Are you geared up? No. You know? Are you not geared

1:03

up for Christmas at all? They were doing a thing on

1:05

the ten in the other day, they went to a place in,

1:07

I think it was Teddington and they were serving

1:09

a lunch for elderly people. And

1:11

you know, it looked like the best Christmas lunch I'd

1:13

ever seen unlike that thing from Hines

1:15

in a tin whereby it

1:17

was the Christmas soup type thing and

1:19

they showed you what it looked like when they were taking

1:21

photographs of it and then they showed what it really

1:24

looked like when they took it out of the tin and it was

1:26

grim. It was very grim, so we've decided

1:28

to give that one a pass. The

1:30

reality TV star who could be jailed

1:33

for distributing on social media

1:35

a sex tape. The

1:37

dogs rescued in this country from the

1:39

Korean meat farm where they still eat

1:41

dog. I know. I know. And

1:44

the Cambridge dictionaries woke

1:47

new definition of a woman. Thus,

1:49

the queen's funeral and pound land,

1:51

do you know more than half of their stock is over

1:53

a quid? I think it's a bit audent.

1:56

Daniel, it should say a pound and

1:58

over because they've been

1:59

selling stuff over a pound for ages and

2:02

ages. I go in there and I buy sometimes

2:04

envelopes. Because they're padded envelopes,

2:06

you get six or is it five for a pound or

2:08

whatever it is, it's quite cheap, and I use those a

2:10

lot. But but the rest of it,

2:12

you see thing you think that's not a pound. And

2:14

I think people think you're going there to save

2:16

money. I don't think you do. I

2:18

mean, there is a lot of there's a lot of crap

2:21

in there, to be honest with you, especially

2:23

in the in the Christmas decoration department,

2:25

but they do you know, I looked the other day, they

2:27

had boxes of after eight minutes, two pound

2:29

fifty. And I thought seen quite good value. And I

2:31

bought those before and bring them in. They devour them

2:33

here. Like, there's no tomorrow. But today,

2:36

they'll be devouring Costco

2:38

mince pies because I bought two boxes. I had

2:40

to keep the bluing things flat all

2:42

the time, and they're very nice mince pies because

2:44

my boss said that he he quite fancied a mince

2:46

pie. So I said, I'm going to Costco.

2:48

I'll buy some and bring them in. So I'd

2:51

so'd brought in eighteen Costco

2:53

men's pies. They're in boxes of not

2:55

but they're big, much bigger than usual ones.

2:57

I mean, really, I should have sort

2:59

of heated them up and then had them with custard or

3:01

something like that, but I didn't bring custard. Just

3:04

brought them in spot, but they won't be disappointed. They

3:06

really won't be. What else?

3:08

Oh, the over fifties? That

3:10

sadly includes me. Making a

3:12

return to work as the cost of living bites.

3:15

It

3:15

has more and more people are going. Well, in fact,

3:18

people also trust older people. Because

3:20

there's no point having younger people

3:22

in in places because they they don't

3:24

care. It's like call centers. You

3:26

get good call centers. And

3:28

you get rubbish call centers.

3:31

And the best one we discovered years ago

3:33

was Lakeland. Lakeland's

3:35

call center people are of a certain age

3:38

I might be doing a sweeping generalization, but

3:41

they're of a certain age and they're nothing

3:43

but polite. Nothing but polite. Nothing

3:45

is too much trouble. There's other call centers, you

3:47

think I'm gonna lose my temper and they're gonna cut me off in

3:50

a minute. And then you're gonna have to go back and try and

3:52

find the same person and it's never gonna happen.

3:54

Like, over once when I was when I was doing something.

3:56

And I said, can I speak to your manager? There's nobody

3:58

here. And of course, how what

4:00

are you supposed to do? Your at the end of a telephone.

4:02

If somebody says there's nobody here, I can't go

4:04

listen you liar. You know,

4:06

go and produce a manager. There's nobody here, sir. Can I

4:08

help you any further? When I

4:10

had a problem years and years at Donkeys years

4:12

ago when my American Express card was cloned,

4:15

in a garage which has long since gone and they've stuck

4:17

up to surprise the browser blocker flats. And

4:19

and I said to American Express, I said,

4:22

listen, have a very good month after they they were

4:24

quizzing me, basically calling me a liar.

4:26

By saying all of these transactions,

4:29

each one was an individual case.

4:31

So until it was they were all paid off or

4:33

they were deleted. There was nothing I could do

4:35

about it. I was kind of stuck. I remember saying

4:37

to the person, the operative, they were based

4:39

in South End, I

4:41

think. And I said, I have a good mind to

4:43

close my account. And all I got from them was,

4:45

you're perfectly entitled to do that, sir,

4:48

which kind of throws you

4:50

although I did have a complaint about something once

4:52

and I was fuming. I was

4:54

fuming on the telephone. I'm like, hold yourself

4:56

back, Steven. Have another bottle of Prosecco.

4:59

And and I was sort of I was sort of going through.

5:01

And the woman the other end of the phone, she said, I

5:03

know. She said, I know exactly

5:05

how you feel. And all of a sudden,

5:07

the tables were turned. And

5:09

I'd so I'd been sort of ranting off and say, this

5:11

is absolutely disgraceful. This how can this and

5:13

she went, listen. It's happened to me as well.

5:15

She said, I know exactly. And all of a sudden,

5:17

I felt sorry for her. And

5:19

it was very clever. It was this

5:21

sort of They they teach you different

5:23

ways of dealing with people who become very

5:25

irate, but we didn't get

5:27

irate the other day. Did we because HMLC

5:30

have admitted that they made errors

5:32

on my VAT account. And

5:35

now we don't have Steve Allen. We

5:37

just have the name of my company, but

5:39

it's not called Stitch. In case we're thinking you're searching

5:41

for it, it's not called Steve Allen. Has

5:43

nothing to do with Steve Allen at all.

5:45

It's just it's an off the shelf company because

5:47

you get people who are a bit peculiar and

5:49

and they go and check it out and say, oh, I see how much

5:51

you weren't last year because there is a there was

5:53

somebody else I think in something. I

5:55

forget what it was and it said, oh, I see how much

5:57

you earned last year, but you can't find any of my

5:59

stuff

5:59

online because it's not under my

6:02

name. Which is But peep People are

6:04

really weird. I mean, really peculiar.

6:06

Very old. Why would you want to find out what somebody

6:09

earned? You

6:10

know, I mean, I always freely tell people

6:12

pound. And, you know,

6:14

believe me. You believe me. If you don't, you couldn't care less.

6:16

And many different people do get the weirdos.

6:19

It's like people who've got to know what your car is.

6:21

They'll take a photograph of your car and put it up

6:23

online because they're a bit purvey. It's

6:25

a bit peculiar. Also, this is

6:27

where he lives and this is everything. You

6:29

really are sick, aren't you? These people are

6:31

very, very old. Fortunately, Turkey's

6:33

going up forty five percent up.

6:36

But then you don't have to have Turkey.

6:39

I offer you that as an alternative because

6:43

not everybody likes it. But this

6:45

meal that these pensioners got the other day, not

6:47

only did the vegetables look brilliant,

6:49

but the sprouts were bright green

6:51

The carrots were bright orange. They had pigs

6:53

in blankets. It looked it looked really good.

6:56

Really, very good. And I was very pleased. And

6:58

It was, I think, a local couple.

7:01

They sort of open up this hall and

7:03

they serve a hot Christmas meal to

7:05

these pensioners, and then they had dancing but

7:07

hats on and everything else. And I thought how

7:09

brilliant? How brilliant is that?

7:11

It was it was it was

7:13

very nice, very good. But it was the fact

7:15

that because, you know, normally, if you go out and you get vegetables

7:18

in places, they look a bit tired. They look

7:20

as I've been sitting in the water for ages and

7:22

ages, but these ones all look delicious.

7:24

And for anybody who writes in and says, I don't

7:27

like sprouts, you're gonna be barred.

7:29

Okay. I've decided I'm starting a campaign.

7:31

Equal writes for

7:33

Sprout lovers, which we should have. But I

7:35

went to Costco yesterday to pick up these things. And I

7:37

get in the lift to go to the deck. I could do the

7:39

ramp, but to be honest with you, I really can't be

7:41

bothered. And so I do the the

7:43

lift and another couple got

7:45

in, husband and wife and it

7:47

was very interesting because she goes to push the

7:49

button, but she's pushing the button for

7:51

the floor that we are on. And I

7:53

said, no. I said, we're we're we're going down to

7:55

the basement. She went, oh,

7:57

I

7:57

said, you're not too sure are you.

7:59

She went, no. Then her husband said,

8:02

those immortal lines. Don't

8:04

we recognize your voice? And

8:07

it turns out they came to one of my live shows

8:09

at the Hippodrome, a few years back. I

8:11

think it must've been about three or four years ago that we

8:13

did the live shows there. Now it's magic bic

8:15

acid, which strangely enough, there's nothing to do with everybody

8:17

called Mike, and there's no magic in it.

8:19

But they laughed. I said, no, we're at

8:21

the Leicester Square Theatre next

8:23

year, February, and

8:25

sold out. Very popular show.

8:27

Little bit magic and all

8:29

sorts of exciting goodies and everything else.

8:32

What else we got? Happy birthday to

8:34

Miranda Hart. And

8:37

Tony Beak has told how the

8:39

spirit of Bruce Foresight will be with him at the

8:41

palladium, sadly not sweet cheeks. I

8:43

do I wish you'd stop aligning yourself

8:45

with with Brucey. You look nothing like

8:47

him. You don't even have a third of his

8:49

talent. It's just that you're just big

8:51

headed. And you think that you've got all Bruce's

8:53

talent, you haven't, Bruceie played the piano,

8:55

he sang, he tapped, danced, he

8:57

was the best game show host we've probably

8:59

ever had. In this country. We've got a few other people,

9:01

but it's not easy to be a game show

9:03

host. And Bruce c, you know,

9:05

originated some of the larger good game,

9:07

good game, you know, higher,

9:10

lower, high what'd you get nothing on this show

9:12

for two in a bed? You know, and all that kind of

9:14

stuff. Well, Brucey was great, but it

9:16

didn't tolerate falls. was

9:18

carefully crafted. His his comedy

9:20

was very carefully crafted. People don't

9:22

realize that comedy is an art.

9:24

You know, Day Medna, used

9:26

to write everything down. The the team

9:28

would write stuff down. I bet Peter k does

9:30

exactly the same Bob Munkhouse had

9:32

piles and piles of books with

9:34

jokes in. We could remember things. Ken Dodd had

9:36

exactly the same. He could go on

9:38

stage, you know, for an hour and a half spot.

9:40

Do three hours. They used to have to

9:42

write clauses into the contract to say, listen, if

9:44

you're not offstage at eleven, we're

9:46

locking the doors. You can all stay there, all behind you

9:48

and I, so I was very concerned, because he just went

9:50

on. He never stopped. You

9:52

know, once he'd started

9:54

on stage, he was

9:56

great. He was great. He was fantastic.

9:58

Although, I did see him die on a couple of occasions

10:00

because you know, his was an old fashioned

10:02

sense of humor, but still still

10:04

interesting. New Zealand is gonna impose

10:06

a smoking ban on the young.

10:08

Good idea out there in full circle. Have you been to New Zealand?

10:10

Don't bother. It's closed. And

10:12

I think they're open Monday to Wednesday now. They

10:14

do half day, and you can you can

10:16

pop in and see them for Andrew

10:19

Flintoff. Was it Andrew or Freddie

10:21

Flintoff? Andrew says

10:23

Christian name, but he goes by Freddie.

10:26

Or Doris depending on where he is in the

10:28

country. He he's apparently taken a hospital after a

10:30

top gear accident. They have these, don't

10:32

they? They have these accidents on top gear.

10:34

You gotta I mean, if I'm me messing around with

10:36

things like that. Mortgage is set to

10:38

surge. Three grand

10:40

extra next year reckon for mortgages,

10:42

not so good. And

10:44

almost the other one that I quite liked, I

10:46

quite liked. Oh, Day Mary,

10:48

bagging the finest turkey every Christmas.

10:50

She wraps it in a duvet. She

10:52

wraps her turkey. What? Oh, man. Oh, man.

10:54

I hope not to, you know, on

10:56

how to people have slept in it. That would be absolutely

10:59

dreadful. And my friend

11:01

Warren says it's it's

11:05

so bloody cold. It is

11:07

freezing. It really is. It's what's going on.

11:09

It's called winter. It's called

11:11

winter. You know, it is it

11:13

is cold outside there, but I did get home

11:15

yesterday. I did get home yesterday

11:17

because even though there was a train strike, and

11:19

to be honest with you, they've

11:21

been offered nine percent. I don't know what they're looking

11:24

for, but they're also they've been told by

11:26

the government that the train companies

11:28

have gotta bring themselves up into

11:30

the right era, which means getting rid of ticket

11:32

offices. Nobody wants ticket offices now.

11:34

Like, I didn't see anybody in the banks going

11:36

on strike. Did you? You know, when they

11:38

start closing branches, left, right, and

11:40

center, nobody went on strike over things

11:42

like that. They're gonna close not

11:44

all the ticket offices, but certainly a lot of them, they're

11:46

gonna cut down the amount of staff they've got because

11:48

to be brutally honest, now I use Waterloo

11:51

station every day.

11:53

And they've got loads of staff just standing

11:55

around. I don't know what their

11:58

job is. They're also gonna, I think, change

11:59

some of the track maintenance staff

12:02

and bring dough. They're gonna streamline it. They've

12:04

got to streamline it so that they

12:06

could sort of bring it up to date because otherwise,

12:09

as a producer said to me and he's

12:11

very militant. Very militant person. He's been

12:13

known to stand out there when people were

12:15

burning their bras, collecting them, and selling them on

12:17

eBay. It was a case of he

12:19

sort of He's out there. He said they're not careful.

12:21

People will find alternative ways of

12:23

travel. He himself is not taking the

12:25

train this week. He's driving

12:27

his car. While I say driving, he

12:29

pushes it for most of the way. But I mean, at least he

12:31

makes the effort. You know, downhill, he's

12:33

fine. Always the wind's behind him and everything

12:35

else, and the hamsters run the wheels. Turning

12:37

around as fast as they can. But he said they're

12:39

gonna lose the business that they've got, and then they're

12:41

gonna be laying people off. And very shortly,

12:43

people said, you know, sod it for the railways.

12:45

Go way. We can use buses. We can use

12:47

the underground. Certain parts

12:49

of the country, you get trams and things like that.

12:51

So they've got to be careful. But

12:53

I don't I don't think old Lynchy cares.

12:56

He really doesn't care. They've got

12:58

headlines on the papers today, basically telling

13:00

him he's he's a bit outdated.

13:02

You know, he is a dinosaur. He's from the

13:04

old era of sort of your union.

13:06

We don't work in class. I don't know why they have to

13:08

be working class. Why can't you be middle class

13:10

and in a union? Doesn't make

13:13

any sense at all to me.

13:15

What have we got now? Ten years

13:17

of Harrismuth, jail reprieve.

13:19

For a neighbor from hell, these people

13:21

are awful, aren't they? And Robbie Williams

13:23

believes in angels, mad

13:25

as a broomstick mad as a broomstick. I mean,

13:27

you're only gonna believe in an angel when you're

13:30

dead. Not gonna believe in many other time, but

13:32

it's because he had a hit apparently with a song

13:34

called angel. And and

13:36

when he did it at Nevworth, I I did think it was one

13:38

of the best moments. I spoke to somebody who was on

13:40

stage with him in the band when he

13:42

played Nevworth. And I said, what was it like when

13:44

he said, don't ever leave

13:46

me. This is angels in that funny

13:48

little northern way he had of

13:50

introducing his songs. And then he

13:52

goes into a sudden

13:54

when does and the whole crowd sang

13:56

it. The whole crowd sang it. And then they

13:58

do a big surge at the end,

13:59

and all this can fetti bombs and

14:02

everything. It was brilliant. It was really good, but

14:04

I spoke to somebody who was playing in

14:06

Robbie Williams band. And I said, what was it like? He

14:08

said, it was incredible. He said

14:10

the power of that crowd, and all

14:12

Robbie Williams wrote was and

14:14

down the waterfall. The rest of it

14:16

was all Guy Chambers. Because if you remember Guy

14:18

Chambers went I don't wanna write for you anymore. I

14:20

don't mind doing all the odd bits and bits. I wanna go and write for

14:22

other people and Robbie went all up a two. So it's

14:24

a toy sound. You can't leave me like because

14:27

guy was the only person writing hits for him.

14:29

If you left it to Robbie Williams, it's like the Spice

14:31

Girls. They haven't written a song in years. Seriously,

14:34

there's no I mean, Victoria Beckham. I've

14:36

always doubted whether or not she could write anything

14:38

at all. But still to come, I

14:40

got such a good story. And it's

14:42

about it's about a reality

14:44

show, not in this country, not to

14:46

this country. It's in a I like to be in

14:48

America. And we've

14:50

talked about this before. We've

14:52

talked about it before, but we new

14:54

twist on it, ladies and gentlemen, which you'll hear

14:56

only on the Steve Allen program.

14:59

This is LVC with

15:01

Steve Allen. Morning.

15:03

So here I love stories like this. Oh

15:05

my goodness, man. I revel in other

15:07

people's misery. And in this particular

15:09

instance, there is so much misery

15:11

because I got a a text and

15:14

I think it was from I don't

15:16

know who it's from actually, but Katie in

15:18

Westby Fleet who says I

15:20

remember a while back Steve, you're referring to a

15:22

reality show called Chrisley

15:24

Knows Best about a family from

15:26

Atlanta, where the dad

15:28

Todd Chrisley was quite camp and you commented

15:30

that their house was strangely,

15:33

sparsely decorated. They're a

15:35

rich family and acclaimed to make their

15:37

fortune by property developed What it

15:40

turns out they're fraudsters. They

15:42

are fraudsters, and it's

15:44

very interesting They've been

15:47

investigated for a number they hadn't paid

15:49

tax. For years and years,

15:51

about five years on the truck, they hadn't paid

15:53

any tax. Every time I saw them on the television, I

15:55

couldn't quite work out where their where their

15:57

money came from. And

15:59

they professed to being real

16:02

estate. But we never saw anything

16:04

and they had an aged mother who

16:06

used to wear a wig and used to get very

16:08

drunk and they've got a young son and

16:10

a daughter who not implicated in

16:12

any of these things at all, but they are

16:14

known for this

16:16

show called Chrisley

16:18

knows best. And they would

16:21

take you through their life. They would go out. They go

16:23

out shopping. He was as camp as a

16:25

proverbial Christmas tree. Not that that makes any

16:27

difference. It's just that I couldn't quite believe. The wives

16:29

seem quite nice. But

16:31

anyway, they've just

16:33

been sent to prison. They're

16:35

just I mean, these are two people who are big

16:37

on television in America. And the

16:39

reason is they were found guilty

16:41

of federal fraud charges and

16:44

hiding their wealth from tax authorities

16:46

they had ended up borrowing and

16:48

fraudulently getting thirty million

16:50

dollars in loans from a scheme that

16:52

went on for years. Their accountant was

16:54

found guilty of tax fraud for filing

16:56

false corporate tax returns What's

16:59

interesting is this so called celebrity

17:01

couple or let's just call them the

17:03

crooks. We're accused of submitting false

17:05

documents to request bank loans and

17:07

using a production company to hide the

17:09

income from the IRS, all

17:11

while flaunting their lavish lifestyle on

17:13

television. They based their empire on

17:15

the lie that their wealth came from dedication

17:18

and hard work. But in fact, they

17:20

jumped from one fraud scheme to another

17:22

lying to the banks stifling

17:24

vendors and evading taxes at every

17:27

corner. So the prosecutors had

17:29

recommended the nod Chrisley, sentenced

17:32

to seventeen and a half years.

17:34

They've increased it to twenty

17:37

two and Julie Christie

17:39

from ten to twelve

17:41

and a half years in Nick, saying

17:43

their arrogance merit special consideration

17:46

how embarrassed mister children be.

17:48

How about you imagine that it's such a

17:50

good line. Their arrogance merits

17:52

special consideration. I

17:55

said, But, you know, she

17:57

never questioned Steve Allen. I'm always right about

17:59

somebody. If I spot something that's that's

18:01

not quite right, I'll tell you it's not quite

18:03

right, and then people get, you're right, you know.

18:06

right on that one. And Chrisley

18:08

knows best. Obviously not, as

18:10

the old as the old fraudster is

18:12

banged up in prison. Finally, you'll go

18:14

back and watch these now. He's a crook. The

18:17

son and the daughter have had all their teeth

18:19

done all these, all based on

18:21

loans. But they take it out from all the banks.

18:23

And then they I think there was one year, and

18:25

then it went to the second year, then the third year, then the fourth

18:27

year, and they didn't pay any tax at all.

18:29

They were filing fraudulent things where there's one

18:32

thing I've always been honest about. Hand

18:34

on heart, and I'm I'm no paragon of

18:36

virtue, believe you, me. I've always paid

18:39

my taxes. Always paid my

18:41

taxes, always paid my bills on time,

18:43

always with the help of my brother. Obviously, I can't I

18:45

can't do it without my brother. He does everything

18:47

for me. I just say this building is paying

18:49

and he pays it because I like to get bills out of

18:51

the way. If you can afford to do

18:53

it, I do it. So the other day, and

18:55

it's not due till January. The

18:57

bill for maintenance on on my

18:59

property. And I paid it. I

19:01

paid it. If I even, Vincent, you paid

19:03

it. I'm, you know, paid it. Because

19:05

I think a lot of people leave it till the last minute,

19:07

but I see no advantage in leaving it till I'd

19:09

rather get it cleared up so I know what money I've

19:11

got. I can look in my account.

19:13

And I can see exactly how

19:15

many pennies I've got left to sort of get

19:17

me through. And it's not so much, you

19:20

know, we'll we'll be having Turkey this Christmas. There'll be

19:22

a leg you know, shared between thirteen

19:24

of us will all have a lick, and that'll

19:26

be as far as it goes. But interesting

19:28

that sort of Chrisley knows best, Crisley,

19:31

unfortunately, didn't. And every time you look at him now, you can

19:33

just go, you're a pair of

19:35

fraudsters. So So

19:37

years and years in prison, by which

19:39

time I should imagine the mother will die because

19:41

there's faces she looks like she's on her last legs and

19:43

the kids will just have to disappear and

19:46

reinvent themselves. Because if your parents are

19:48

fraudsters, you know, what do you

19:50

what do you do about it? What do you do? It

19:52

must be the most embarrassing thing

19:54

ever. Most embarrassing. See,

19:56

buses are still quite reliable,

19:58

says Peter?

19:59

Yes, yesterday. I got

20:01

the train to Hammersmith,

20:03

the underground, which is nine

20:05

stops. Producers trying to kick me with an extra two shoved

20:07

in, never the word it was only nine. And

20:10

so I got off, walked

20:12

up the sliding climb, a little bit of

20:14

stick out there. Anyway, get there get onto the escalator.

20:16

It takes me into the bus station.

20:18

Which is above in Hammersmith. And

20:21

within six minutes, the bus comes along, so I

20:23

grabbed a seat. Because by

20:25

the time he got to twickenham, It

20:27

was full of gassy school children.

20:30

The child catcher in Chitty

20:32

Chitty Bang Bang had the right idea

20:35

children, lollipops, pink

20:37

ice cream, and all free

20:39

today. Because you could've

20:41

got rid of the old lot of them, and they are

20:43

so noisy. I must be getting

20:45

really ancient. You know, you you feel

20:47

like saying why you

20:49

have to be so noisy. But anyway,

20:51

So the bus was packed and I got in probably about half

20:53

an hour after I would normally have

20:55

got in. I mean, I could have got off the bus

20:57

at the station. Twickenham station and

20:59

sort of been to get myself a hot class song. To

21:01

be honest with you, it was still packed with all these

21:04

noisy tourists sorry,

21:06

noisy school children. And

21:08

everybody else. So I got that. I'll do the same

21:10

today. So I know how long it's gonna

21:12

take me. It doesn't really bother me. You

21:14

know, nothing to do. I don't know why the

21:16

RMT have to target us. The train companies couldn't

21:18

give a flying forex.

21:20

That's why they're sitting

21:21

there, twiddling their thumbs and

21:24

dragging it out because at

21:26

the moment, RMT members have lost about

21:28

five grand each. And what

21:30

have they got? Nothing. Nothing

21:32

at all. I could understand it.

21:34

If they were sort of an agreement on something, but you know

21:36

what old Lynch is like, he loves

21:38

the power. He'd he'd

21:40

have been the bloke shoving

21:42

the the gladiators into the ring in Roman ties, but

21:44

staying outside. For his own

21:46

benefit, he's on his own eighty six thousand pound,

21:48

he wasn't care. Ozicare, he's

21:51

proving to people just how much power he

21:53

wields. Unfortunately, for the

21:55

people who are the workers, the other end who ain't

21:57

getting any money, Not

21:59

much fun for them. Not much fun at

22:01

all. So they've turned down nine percent because

22:03

there's gonna be some redundancies. But

22:05

you've gotta streamline

22:06

a company. It's not a charity.

22:08

It's a company. I

22:10

work for a company, a very

22:13

successful company. But, you know, if they needed to

22:15

make cutback I would pray to God that I wouldn't be one

22:17

of the cutbacks, but I could see other areas where you

22:19

could make cutbacks of somebody who

22:21

maybe wasn't as important. But

22:23

the on air talent is, you know, the main thing. For

22:26

television as well, for

22:28

television and for radio and for

22:31

driving the trains because they want to do away with

22:33

the conductors. So the conductors

22:35

could be retrained as train drivers,

22:37

I suppose, or something. I don't know.

22:39

You know, and they say, well, the train driver can't do it. Well, the

22:42

trains are automatic. All he's gotta do is keep his

22:44

hand on the dead man's handle, and that's

22:46

it. The train will will drive itself. He's

22:48

just gonna stop it at the red lights and stuff like that. Can't be that

22:50

complicated. They're doing it. I mean, I couldn't do it,

22:52

but somebody else can do it. And you

22:54

think to yourself, they're not gonna win this

22:56

battle because the moment the

22:58

train companies capitulate. The union are gonna

23:00

be

23:00

down on them like a ton of bricks, and they'll do

23:02

it again. They they go up. We're bringing them out now. We're now

23:04

at twenty percent. And you

23:06

think no. So they're gonna do it on

23:08

their terms. And that's why it's

23:10

gonna drag out for ages. So

23:13

we've got many more we got another two

23:15

days this week, three days. Can't remember.

23:17

Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, I believe. And

23:19

then we'll have some more dates brought in as well.

23:21

I mean, either way, nobody

23:23

wins. It's a no win situation. Old,

23:25

old, Lincey doesn't win. The RMT

23:27

don't win. The train companies

23:30

don't win. And all the people who've got shops

23:32

at all the stations and all the restaurants in

23:34

London and wherever you are, they don't win

23:36

either. They went to a weather

23:38

spoons the other night. hundred

23:40

and sixty bookings canceled because

23:42

of the train strike, a hundred and sixty.

23:44

And they went into a weather spoons. Now normally

23:46

weather spoons, as you know, they're in some of

23:48

these lovely buildings. They're heaving. Three

23:52

people. Three people in the weather spoons. And you think

23:54

yourself that's as a direct result

23:56

of the union not agreeing to

23:58

the terms and conditions which are gonna be laid down. What

24:00

do they do? Nothing that just keep dragging it out.

24:02

You will have a picture. Over Christmas

24:04

of somebody standing by burning grazier,

24:07

with a lot of well meaning people and a big fat old

24:09

linchy standing there. I'll bring

24:11

out people. I'm powerful. I'm this and that. But the

24:13

only person who's losing is them under

24:16

his leadership, be take be taking something, wouldn't

24:18

it really? You know, if if the

24:20

workers went we're going back to work.

24:23

They did it in a

24:25

great carry on film called carry on at

24:27

your convenience where they made

24:30

lavatories bold and COVID was

24:32

called, and they had a union leader there and

24:34

something would happen. They were making

24:36

these toilets in the

24:38

factory, the carry on film, remember, And and he saw

24:40

somebody putting in a a

24:42

tap. And he went, we're doing

24:44

Bert. He went, I'm putting in

24:46

a tap. That's

24:48

not your your job to put in the tap. He said to me, but I might

24:50

as well do it because it's passing in front of me. And

24:52

he looked at the union rule book and he went,

24:54

everybody out. And this factory had a history

24:56

of everybody going out.

24:58

Every time something was slightly different with the

25:00

way that they assembled the toilets all

25:02

you know, the screw and plugs and the taps and all the other bits

25:04

and pieces. Until the end, his mother came

25:06

out of the room, I've had enough of this.

25:09

And she put him over a lap and gave him

25:11

a good smack on the bottom. Yeah. Really

25:13

good smack on the bottom, which people pay good

25:15

money for nowadays. And and

25:18

and they all went back into work again. And all the

25:20

other women were going out bloody

25:22

time. Why have we been shepherded

25:24

around like sheep? You know, whereas any person losing

25:26

his ass, what a miserable Christmas it's gonna

25:28

be at their household. Shouldn't imagine they

25:30

want it. So Let

25:35

common sense prevail, please.

25:37

Roger says I must admit I

25:39

pressed the wrong button on the lift at Costco the first time I went

25:41

there because the basement isn't really a

25:43

basement. No, it's ground level. It's

25:46

confusing. You go up. Into

25:48

the sky, up into the sky.

25:50

See, you've seen Steve. I

25:52

vet from Sydney. Hello.

25:54

It says you were reading about Barry Humphrey

25:57

and his You're right, we're always very early

25:59

stumps. Yes, he was barred from Qantas

26:01

because he used to get on the Qantas

26:04

flight. And he would take on a

26:06

little tin of

26:08

Haines vegetable salad and

26:10

he would pour it into the

26:12

sick bag halfway through through the flight, you'd

26:14

be going pretend

26:16

to

26:16

be sick and then start eating

26:19

it.

26:19

Qantas decided that was enough. He was

26:21

barred for a significant period. So

26:24

it was, you know, it was one

26:26

of those things. I've never done stuff like that. I've never

26:28

sort of No. I've not intentionally done

26:30

anything. I don't play pranks goodness sake,

26:32

honestly. But my age playing a prank

26:34

just seems a bit ridiculous, isn't

26:36

it? But so pleased

26:38

about Chrisley. So pleased about him. Emily's wife

26:40

oh, the funny thing is I like the wife. If

26:42

I'd realized that they were a pair of old

26:45

fraudsters, to the tune of about thirty eight million quid. I wouldn't have

26:47

taken to them so quickly. But as I say,

26:49

the people who suffer, the mother,

26:51

the embarrassment for her poor old

26:54

soul, And the kids really,

26:56

really embarrassing. That's our parents.

26:58

In prison, the criminals,

27:00

the fraudsters, they've de pro diffruded

27:03

people. Why can I

27:05

not stop smiling? It's embarrassing, isn't

27:07

it?

27:09

Leading Britain's conversation, LBC,

27:13

with Steve Hallo.

27:15

Dear

27:15

Steve and

27:18

producer, I wish somebody could spell, but

27:20

there you go, we kind of everything. This is what may happen if the

27:22

railways lose business to the roads because of

27:24

lynching co. Well, the trouble is

27:26

people are discovering that there are

27:28

other means of transportation. You

27:30

do not need to rely on the railways. I can get home

27:33

perfectly easily by by

27:35

using the underground and the buses.

27:37

You know, the producer is doing it because he's

27:40

basically tightened. It would take him about three years to get

27:42

home again, but that's a problem. You know, the further out

27:44

you choose to live, that's your worry. I don't know why people

27:46

would expect people to for that privilege.

27:48

Ridiculous, honestly. So, I mean,

27:50

I I don't really know actually.

27:52

You know, whether or not they're going to agree

27:55

on something. They're gonna have to agree to disagree, and then they're gonna

27:57

have to capitulate, and they're gonna have to

27:59

negotiate properly. But at the moment, it's

28:01

old Lynchy doing his, I'm the big

28:03

bully boy. And we're not doing

28:05

it. So consequently all the poor members are going,

28:07

how long is this gonna go on for? And the answer is

28:09

as long as he wants. Because

28:11

you're basically being led by the nose by him. He's telling

28:13

you what to do and people are so frightened

28:16

about disobeying it. Whereas

28:19

in fact, it could be sold quite easily. Lots

28:21

of people over the years, especially during

28:23

pandemic and stuff like that, lost their their

28:26

jobs. Basically, because the shops just closed down. Well,

28:28

they they didn't go on picket lines and everything

28:30

else. And so you're gonna close I

28:32

mean, why would you need a ticket office?

28:35

You know, and don't say to buy tickets because you can

28:37

buy them on the machines. All the machines are

28:39

automated. They take credit cards. They take cash. They

28:41

do everything. You can buy a ticket.

28:43

if you're blind, they've got people there who can help

28:46

you. But they won't fire them all.

28:48

They'll have enough people there. And how many blind

28:50

people do you see? Buying tickets at the ticket

28:52

station in the course of maybe how about

28:54

a month. Maybe two,

28:56

two or three, maybe two or three people, so

28:58

you could do away with ticket offices.

29:01

You know, blind people will have a concessionary card

29:03

anyway, so you don't need to worry about it. Did

29:05

you know that, in fact, if you remember that you diplomatic

29:07

or you get a silver star.

29:10

And if you get stopped by the police, you just show your silver

29:12

star and they wave you through.

29:14

Wave you through. I've had

29:16

a little shink wave

29:19

you through. But yeah. So there's all

29:21

sorts of things. So it's no good putting out what you were

29:23

saying. So you've got to have all the ticket office

29:26

offices starved because a blind person might want to buy a ticket.

29:28

Well, I see lots of blind people being

29:30

helped. There's one who gets off my

29:32

train in the morning. And

29:34

he's a young man and he's got a white stick and they send the guard and the

29:36

guard will lead him up to the barriers and

29:38

through the barriers the other side, then he makes it on his

29:41

own, you know, and you could do the same

29:43

buying tickets. It's as simple as

29:45

that. You've seen, have you ever tried the things

29:47

at the at the traffic

29:50

lights for blind people? You

29:52

try that. You've done that system. So

29:54

that's quite a good system, but you can you

29:56

just ask somebody if

29:58

if people at Waterloo station,

29:59

Awesome Pankers or any other station,

30:02

see a blind person or disabled person. They say, do you need any

30:04

help? If they say, I need to get a ticket.

30:06

It mainly means they haven't got any family with them

30:08

or anything like that. So they

30:10

take they take them to the thing. They say, where do

30:12

you wanna go? And they'll say here, do you want a

30:14

do you want a one day return?

30:17

And they and it's very simple

30:19

to do. Then they take them to the gate they say, this is

30:21

your train, the door opens, you push

30:23

them on, you shut the door after them and

30:25

everybody's happy. You know? Apparently,

30:27

the producer sees basically thousands

30:29

of people on a daily basis all

30:31

queuing up to get tickets. It's like saying, how

30:33

do they know where the pasty shop

30:35

is? something like that. They don't. They

30:37

make their own at home, and they take them with them. So

30:39

they've got a ready cooked meal on the train.

30:41

That's what it is. There's loads of people at Waterloo

30:43

say, they're not short of people.

30:45

I like to imagine how many people work at Waterloo says,

30:48

I know a guy called Lenny, and he has to

30:50

clean the trains. So in other

30:52

words, the train pulls in he and

30:54

his mates have got so much time to walk through

30:56

the train, pick up the metros, pick up the people

30:58

leave coffee cups on the floor,

31:00

people are that thick, They leave

31:01

the coffee cups on the floor. The train lurch is

31:03

not as much as buses do. My god,

31:06

honestly. Buses, drivers, what do they do?

31:08

Sit there with a foot on the brake. You

31:10

know, let's say how many we knock over. It's like skittles. Don't

31:13

don't don't don't don't break. And then, you

31:15

know, half a ton of school children fall into

31:17

you. You go, get off Generally

31:20

speaking, I'm quite calm. A lot of your shows says

31:22

Pauline got me through the lockdown. We went to

31:24

see James Feelon last night.

31:27

Very good magician and Paul Daniel's nephew

31:29

love the magic. Oh, we love the magic. We

31:31

love I'm waiting for some magic to arrive,

31:34

actually. Which hasn't done. But only because at the

31:36

moment, the post office are

31:38

overwhelmed with the

31:40

amount of parcels that are

31:42

coming through the door at the moment because everybody's

31:44

ordering for Christmas. But as I

31:46

say, you know, some people order for themselves because

31:48

they've got sales on and you can you can

31:50

save an awful lot of money. The

31:52

best flavored booze will

31:54

have and also fans of Masterchef

31:56

are convinced that Joe creating

31:58

rude food shot shots.

31:59

They ah are. They have

32:01

it on lots of different things. I think Chris

32:04

Packam also has something where they weave

32:06

in rude names. On the

32:08

nature programs. But as I say, what

32:10

what on Masterchef and quite a lot of

32:12

the other ones, you get to you

32:15

get people doing Ruudis They'll

32:17

they'll rearrange two meringues and a

32:19

sausage, you know, and you're supposed

32:21

to not see what it is. They used to

32:23

do it. On can't

32:25

cook, won't cook, cook, cook, cook, cook.

32:27

And it was a case of they

32:29

used to bring on Ainsley Harriet, and

32:31

he'd go on about his giant pepper pot.

32:34

Like we weren't supposed to know what he was

32:36

talking about, and then they dumped him

32:38

because he was rubbish. But yeah.

32:40

I mean, I think peep people are setting things up

32:42

because it's it's fun for them. They

32:44

go, oh, let let's rearrange two oranges in

32:46

a milk bottle. You know, somebody says,

32:48

what's that supposed to be? And they go, come on.

32:50

Nudge nudge nudge because it's basic infantile

32:53

humor. Helen says, I

32:55

watched a comedy set check around

32:57

poundland where the actor spent five minutes going around the

32:59

shop, asking the shopper system, How

33:01

much is this? Over and over again, despite the

33:03

big sign saying poundland, I worked in a

33:05

charity shop. Most customers were lovely, but on more

33:07

than one occasion, somebody would question the

33:10

price and say, I'm not paying that much. It's too expensive because

33:12

the goods have been donated. I'm only prepared

33:14

to pay fifty percent. I wasn't

33:16

allowed to be rude for customers, but

33:19

I'm usually say, sorry. No, you need

33:21

to pay a pound instead.

33:23

Always gets people. I mean, I tried haggling in

33:25

a in a charity shop whilst they she wasn't having

33:27

it at the woman. It was some red glass

33:29

in the window, and I said it's marked at twenty five pound.

33:31

Would you take twenty? It should look at which way to

33:34

know. I thought I'd write you all bag. I'm not

33:36

donating to your charity shop

33:38

ever again. Last time I give you clothes, which are worth a small

33:40

fortune. Somebody's walking around in Dale

33:42

Winton shirts and jackets at the moment, but

33:44

they don't know it. Gary from

33:46

Berwood, He said, came across his place in

33:48

Bournemouth yesterday. Don't know why, but I thought of you.

33:50

What was that supposed to

33:52

be? That a picture wake up

33:55

Listen. God, didn't have it on the floor. I might as well do it

33:57

myself. If you can't do the bloody pictures

33:59

on the internet, who can? So

34:03

oh, no, that's very festive. Oh, I know what that is.

34:05

That's selling sausages. That

34:07

stall

34:07

will be selling sausages. I

34:10

know because

34:10

I because I've seen very similar ones. They have a big pit

34:12

in the middle and they fill it with cold

34:14

and then they put a a grill over the top of

34:16

it and they grill lots of sausages and

34:19

they go You can have this one with curry bush. This is keeser

34:21

bush. This is hot and spicy bush. This is

34:23

normal bush. And this is just for people who

34:26

haven't got the faintest idea what

34:28

they're eating. And they give you

34:30

the piddliest little roll that goes with it.

34:32

So your giant sausage is hanging out either

34:34

sides of it. What's the point of that? What

34:36

is the point of that? Either you've got a role that

34:38

fits the sausage. Or you

34:40

don't. In which case, don't bother. You're

34:42

wasting my time. People,

34:44

honestly, sort of, peasants. And with you on

34:46

that, Steve, I'm self

34:48

employed and I paid my January tax and

34:50

I'm planning on paying my July tax this week. It

34:52

means I don't spend the money. I don't

34:54

like any bills hanging over. Had it when I was younger? Don't wanna do

34:56

it ever again. You know, I wanna make sure

34:59

that everything's paid. You know,

35:01

pay pay for this pay for that. Try

35:03

not to put stuff on credit card. I've only got the one, which is

35:05

a shame. And steady rail staff went off

35:07

at nine percent, five percent this year and

35:09

four percent next year. And that

35:11

doesn't add up to nine. Does it? What do you think it adds

35:13

up to twenty seven? Can't

35:16

imagine something. It's it's

35:18

not so is it? No depends when they pay it next year. It might not be over two years. They

35:20

might be paying it in Jan do you know when they're paying

35:22

it? Is it when is it then?

35:24

It's not

35:26

in January. It's

35:27

over yes. When they do the pay review, when is it? You you're supposed

35:28

to be the fountain of all knowledge of everything.

35:31

I mean, you understand the work of

35:33

disabled people, blind people,

35:36

buying tickets. And now you can tell me when the RMT are going to get this extra bit

35:38

of money next year. What month is it coming in? Is

35:40

it coming in April? Is it coming

35:44

in May? June, August, December. They've changed

35:46

first of December. Right.

35:48

So five percent now, Well,

35:51

that's a total of nine percent, isn't it? Will you

35:54

make it? So it's over

35:56

two years. Small wonder you never

35:58

got the voucher. I tell you they made a very good decision

36:00

on that one. No point of

36:02

giving that to you. If I was dishing out vouchers,

36:04

you'd be the last person I'd give it to.

36:06

Goodness, sake. And Steve

36:08

says, Chris, I don't watch the television now as

36:11

I ditch my television license. However, it

36:13

was the death of Sharon's mother.

36:15

Announced on the news, I read it on Sharon's Twitter

36:17

feed a few days ago. I ran a Ronnie,

36:19

it was only a day before share. We're sending

36:21

best wishes to Tina

36:24

Turner, whose son Ronnie, died of cancer. Yes.

36:27

But the trouble is that is that's the thing you

36:29

expect in life. It's the only thing you

36:31

can be absolutely guaranteed of.

36:34

You live, you die. Doesn't matter what you do in the interim

36:36

period. That's what happens. That's what

36:38

happens. You know, sometimes you get a pay rise.

36:40

Sometimes you don't get to pay rise. Sometimes you

36:42

get a voucher. you

36:44

sound a cat in hell's chance of getting a voucher for

36:46

Christmas. You don't have the Christmas party

36:48

standing by yourself in your very

36:50

own Starbucks. Just stand there

36:52

and have the chocolate with the cream that

36:54

disappears on the top. Peter

36:56

says they used to have separate buses for school

36:58

children but probably scraped

37:00

it. They What for boys and girls? Separate? What a brilliant

37:02

idea? Yes. I now

37:04

understand school children are

37:08

normal people. We have it round our way. We've had it for years. They say,

37:10

so if you're an adult, you can't get on a school bus. Well,

37:12

it wouldn't let you on the school bus anyway, but you

37:14

can't do that. Because there's no

37:16

room so they shove all the kids on there with

37:18

their violins and their cellos and

37:20

their organs and everything else and they

37:22

let them sit on the bus and then it get to the other

37:24

end and they all pile off and play

37:26

snowballs except you can't at the moment because it's all

37:28

gone to water. John says,

37:30

am I missing something?

37:32

Why is Steve Allen show?

37:34

Telling stories from carry on at your convenience to give a false idea of

37:36

how unions work today. Look at you

37:39

being all all arch and everything else.

37:41

That was exactly what it

37:44

was. Exactly what it was. It was based on unions the whole film.

37:46

You must watch the film. Of course, it

37:48

was seventy one, of course, it was different.

37:51

Surprisingly, we used to have third class carriages on

37:53

the trains, but you probably haven't worked that bit

37:55

out either yourself, never mind. Save, I

37:57

loved Barry

37:59

the

37:59

Humphreys, but he

38:01

was hilarious. Oh, he was. But

38:03

he had different characters. Didn't need different

38:05

different characters for things,

38:07

which was Steve, you're right about pound land. It should be called

38:09

pound or above. But because some of the sweets

38:11

for two quid and a Bluetooth speaker

38:13

was eight quid. So it's false

38:16

advertising. Well, they they called it poundland. We had

38:18

one in Kingston called the seventy

38:20

five p shop because

38:22

they were all trying to undercut. Then it went down

38:24

to the fifty p shop and everything was fifty pence.

38:26

But admittedly, you were a bit more limited.

38:28

You know, you could get a mug or

38:31

you could get all sorts of different things. All sorts of

38:33

different things. Phil

38:36

says, I'm in high wicker. I'm I'm totally

38:38

blind. The problem is a lot of people don't like

38:41

change. I've just ordered my tickets. For when I

38:43

go away over the phone, they send them

38:45

through the post. I've also booked my assistance.

38:47

You just need to be a bit more organized, and it

38:49

can be sorted out. I'll pass this

38:52

onto the producer. He said, I've done it for

38:54

years traveling up and down the country,

38:56

so it's not a

38:58

big deal. To me. He said, but I can't understand

39:00

about me to some people who are not used to it. So he ordered his tickets over the phone. He books

39:02

his assistance. He said, it's just

39:04

organization. If we could do it, just

39:07

round near me. They have a place where they train blind

39:09

people to go out and they have a carer with them

39:12

and they just go, you know, they've got their stick in

39:14

front and there's a guy

39:16

who shops you know, weekly in Paul Koopa's fruit and vet shop, totally

39:18

blind. Totally blind. And he

39:20

manages to work his way around the shop, and

39:22

he'll sort of say, oh, and they'll stand there and somebody will

39:24

go up

39:26

to Let's say, what do you need, Bob? Whatever his name is. And he'll

39:28

say, I need a cauliflower on this and I put it

39:30

in the bag. He then gives him

39:34

the money. And everybody's happy. It can be done.

39:36

Otherwise, you're gonna have

39:37

places overstaffed with a load of people

39:39

hanging around, you know, doing something

39:41

in the unions. Who used

39:43

to be powerful in this country, but I

39:46

think old Lynchy. I think he's

39:48

taken it a bit too far.

39:50

Steve, hello. On LVC,

39:52

taxed 84850

39:54

Morning. Johnny says, if there's

39:56

no staff at the station, what's the plan? How

39:58

are people gonna help the disabled passenger? They'd

40:01

be so Of course, there's gonna be staff at the station. There just

40:03

won't be as many hanging around, doing

40:06

nothing, waiting for the one disabled person

40:08

that can all ounce on a go,

40:10

let me show you a ticket machine.

40:12

The course is always gonna be staff on the

40:14

station, just not as many. I mean, you can't

40:16

be that naive, surely. Jay says

40:18

whose parents got done for fraud? You have

40:20

to you have to download the program. And of course, if you

40:22

don't download the global player app, you haven't been

40:24

here it again. So you kind of missed out on

40:26

that one. Taker driver

40:28

Phil says after the ridiculous

40:30

situation on the m twenty five this week,

40:32

the government have issued advice

40:34

on winter travel They suggest we

40:36

carry warm clothes, bare shoes, a sleeping

40:38

bag, and a flasco soup. We also

40:40

need a shovel, and two bags of rock

40:42

salt to toe rope in an

40:44

I looked at completed yet on the bus the other

40:46

day. You're barred? No.

40:48

They all say that. Don't if you're going on a long

40:50

journey and snowing. On the one hand, then

40:52

we got the snow at the moment, it's all evaporated, which was

40:54

great. So we just got even more water than

40:56

we had before. It doesn't matter.

40:58

They had six inches of snow up north, not that

41:00

you'd know. But I've seen the pictures. I'm well aware of it.

41:02

Because blind people can't go out in the snow,

41:04

can they? Because you can't find all the

41:06

different bits and pieces you're supposed to with

41:08

your stick So but

41:10

anyway, who wants to live up north? Goodness,

41:12

sake. We've got it all going on down south. We've

41:14

got Mick Lynch down. I bet you haven't seen him

41:16

up north. I bet

41:18

you won't have seen him. Will he will he be

41:20

going around doing that? He'll be doing the photo

41:22

opportunities for Christmas Day. I bet you anything.

41:24

Bet you anything. Somebody

41:27

else somebody else says, no. No.

41:29

No. And with you still being self employed,

41:31

I'm not sure you should pay

41:33

your July tax already. I mean, I used to

41:35

be self employed for forty, five old

41:37

years, but I don't think you need to pay I

41:39

mean, that's a little bit

41:42

previous. We just used to put it into a

41:44

separate account. And and then it was it it sort of it worked

41:46

brilliantly. The Royal Mail strikes

41:48

yet again for two days. Following

41:51

my experience of special delivery one

41:54

PM next day guarantee, took ten

41:56

days for a valuable item to get to my

41:58

e buyer,

42:00

the says Jonathan, I shall never use raw mail again for business or private

42:02

use. I forgot that they were they

42:04

were off again for two

42:06

days. i could way I

42:08

could I could wait. I've only got urgent parcels arriving. It

42:10

doesn't matter, you know. So hope the hamster

42:12

doesn't die in the meantime. But anyway, we shall

42:14

do our best to make sure that it's all

42:16

absolutely brilliant.

42:18

So as Pietro said, the buses are still quite reliable. Well, they were

42:20

actually. They were quite reliable,

42:22

but when I got offered, Hammersmith yesterday,

42:24

they said some buses today might

42:27

be affected, and one of them could be the 267

42:30

So there will be some two six

42:32

sevens, just not as many as they used to

42:34

be. So with a shortage of buses,

42:36

it's gonna be a blemish nightmare. I just don't understand

42:38

this sort of, you know, ambition that

42:40

the the unions have of sort of bringing the

42:42

country down as if we weren't in

42:46

a dreadful state at the at the moment.

42:48

Steve, we had grandma for Christmas dinner last

42:50

year. This year, we're gonna have a turkey,

42:54

says Rose. Yeah. I think that's

42:56

called cannibalism, and I think I have to

42:58

report you to the police over that one.

43:00

Okay? Shane says the weather's crazy.

43:02

It's summer down here. And like the UK, I've seen on the

43:04

news, it snowing in the bush. Nothing worse. Nothing worse

43:06

down in South Wales and Tasmania.

43:08

I've never been to Tasmania, but it

43:10

sounds it sounds quite nice actually.

43:14

And Lee says, there we go. Pre Christmas cold

43:16

spell delivers yeah. It's in Australia,

43:18

but I've seen it snowing in the desert

43:22

before. In the middle of the desert, they

43:24

have snow, but also this this piddly

43:26

stuff you've got here, matey. That's

43:27

no. That's not snow. That's

43:29

not Yeah. But that's not

43:31

snow. That's just That's just somebody coloring in with a white

43:33

pencil. That's not white. So I'm looking, there's nothing. Look, even

43:36

their trees are exempt from

43:38

snow, that's

43:40

not snow. Deliver snow and near record low summer temperatures.

43:42

That's still summer. That is still

43:44

summer. Somebody has gone and take

43:45

take a picture of a bush

43:47

with nothing on it. Slow.

43:49

There's no where'd where'd you see the snow? Those

43:51

little white bits underneath, paper,

43:54

paper tissue. So they've done. They've

43:56

scrunch it up and pushed it under

43:58

the tree. Just to make it look as though Australia is very cold at this

44:00

time of year, even though it's supposed to be

44:02

summer. We don't worry about things

44:04

like that. We will go

44:06

through all the papers because there's no end

44:08

of no end of stories, including the

44:10

one which is which is actually

44:12

quite quite a good idea. For

44:14

the royal family because they're

44:17

warring still still they're warring.

44:19

I mean, it has to finish,

44:21

although we are told that unfortunately

44:24

Harry's gonna carry it on. He's got more stories about

44:26

the royal family, such a

44:28

telltale tit. He really is.

44:30

He's just gonna keep telling you

44:32

stories about, oh, there's nothing

44:34

interesting. We'll wait a minute.

44:36

Factory workers

44:38

are fuming. After bosses offered them a free hot meal topped with a

44:40

cost of living crisis.

44:42

They all got pot noodles.

44:43

What a brilliant idea?

44:46

What

44:46

a brilliant idea? They branded the gesture an insult to

44:49

hardworking families. So there will

44:51

be a selection of

44:54

potted snacks on offering the

44:56

canteen. It's a company called Foltec. And

44:58

the general

44:59

affairs manager, Bruce, says

45:02

we've had nothing but positive feedback. They've

45:04

also decided to provide free toiletries, hot showers, and

45:08

sanitary production. Sanitary

45:10

products. So that's good. And apparently, the

45:12

four hundred and twenty star had also had a

45:14

seven percent pay rise. That's

45:18

really good. Because you've worked for the GMT. Gotta be nine percent, but, you know, you

45:20

get your free pot noodles. And there's quite a

45:22

little selection. 1234567

45:24

You know, mug shot and they've

45:28

got oats and pasta sauce and really

45:30

nice nice things like that. Not rather

45:32

of a voucher, but you can't have everything.

45:34

Can you? A pot noodle is

45:36

just as good. The duffer

45:38

hits the buffers, mixed

45:40

rattled as support plummets I don't

45:42

know. I don't know. They they say office parties scrapped bars

45:45

and pubs empty, and Rishi

45:48

Sunak says not a time

45:50

to ruin a precious time for

45:52

all of he doesn't care.

45:54

Why why would he care? He's not

45:56

interested. That's not his his role in life. His

45:58

role is to get money. For his

46:00

union members, if it drags on for another

46:02

year, they're gonna be really up

46:04

that street that everybody doesn't dream

46:06

of at all. Steve, I always love

46:08

Christmas. When your kids have an Xbox, you really

46:10

need to take a break. As parents should be able to

46:12

ask Santa to take the kids for a day. You

46:14

see, I'm not interested

46:16

actually, really. In

46:18

in in sort of Xbox.

46:20

I don't know anything about Xbox's. I don't

46:22

know anything about them. It's a computer

46:25

thing who cares. And little Josh says you don't seem as quick to attack

46:27

the nurses. As you if you say what the nurses

46:30

earn, obviously, you're a bit of a naive

46:32

person, Josh. You obviously think they

46:34

earn the same as the RMT members. My

46:36

god, go back to the internet. You'll find some stories that

46:38

will appeal to you. What does James O'Brien has?

46:40

Doesn't have

46:42

a stupid step for people who are ultimately thick, and you

46:44

would be considered ultimately

46:46

thick. Really? Goodness

46:48

sake, honestly. Steve,

46:50

a magician without magic is just

46:53

the and Ian. A magician

46:55

without magic is just Ian. I'll

46:58

get around to that later. I don't think I'm gonna get that

47:00

one anytime. Don't explain it to me. I don't

47:02

need you to explain it to me. I've

47:04

been explaining anything else really well

47:06

this morning. Top gears, Andy Flintoff,

47:08

Freddie Flintoff, he'd been shooting

47:10

a car review segment And

47:13

there was a horror crash during film I mean, to

47:15

be honest with you, so filming has now been

47:18

postponed and all anybody cares about is him

47:20

recovering? Absolutely. We wish him the

47:22

very best and hope

47:24

that that he gets better soon. But

47:26

he's not the first person from Top Gear to have a

47:28

major accident. They've

47:30

they've had accidents over

47:32

the years, quite dangerous ones actually,

47:35

really quite dangerous ones. But as

47:37

I said to the presenter involved who shall remain nameless, strap yourself to two

47:39

and a half ton of petrol. There's going to

47:41

be a disaster. You

47:43

know, and the walls, the thing blew up. So you have

47:46

to be very, very careful. Prince

47:48

Harry, in the papers for how much

47:50

longer, we have no idea. Hope not

47:52

too long. He's been accused of

47:54

a PR game, releasing pics,

47:56

taking the saluted US based hours after

47:58

attacking the royal, listen, that's what he wants to do. He's

47:59

not a member of the royal family. I think there

48:02

under fraudulent terms, and

48:04

he shouldn't be there at

48:06

all. Twenty twenty two

48:09

oh, no. Sorry. Twenty twenty one, eight hundred according

48:11

to the papers today, Albanian migrants

48:14

arrived in this country. Twenty

48:16

twenty two,

48:18

thirteen thousand. And

48:20

so now the prime minister is launched because obviously everybody else has given up.

48:22

Because they they didn't have any luck with the planes. They

48:24

didn't have any luck with sort of getting people back to

48:26

Albania, which is not a war torn country.

48:29

They're now using the they could be people

48:31

trafficked, but they have no evidence to suggest

48:34

this. They're just sort of taking a stab

48:36

in the dark. Jane Moore

48:38

says today owed to be a fly on the wall at Sandringham this

48:40

Christmas. Yes. I have to I mean, I

48:42

don't know whether they would talk about it or

48:44

not talk

48:46

about it. They'd have to make sure that

48:48

they'd be nobody worked for the royal family within within listening distance

48:50

because otherwise they could have a

48:52

have a field age. Many years ago, Charles

48:56

did his thing he was out with the boys, they were

48:58

skiing. And Nicholas Whittchell was was

49:00

doing the interviews. And Charles said, I can't

49:02

stand that

49:04

man. He didn't realize that their microphones could pick up everything he said.

49:06

So there was not a lot

49:08

that you could do about it. Paul Ondrikus, which

49:10

all got a ton of publicity out

49:13

of it. And Charles decided in future not

49:15

to say anything else because they've

49:17

got microphones. Robbie Williams

49:19

believes in angels. And he

49:22

believes that his hit

49:24

tune is actually a religious song, mainly

49:26

because he didn't write it. So he's only

49:28

guessing he just did and down

49:30

the waterfall. And he also liked some of the ideas of

49:32

conspiracy theorist David Ike,

49:34

who claims you'll remember David

49:36

Ike mad as the proverbial

49:39

Brad Bin. He claims humans are being

49:41

ruled by secret society of

49:43

reptilian aliens, mad as

49:46

a fruit bat. I'm afraid.

49:48

Robbie says, I believe in something, but I don't

49:50

know what that is.

49:52

Well, let's see. Used to be and take that, and then you

49:54

left it. We can believe in that. Can't

49:56

we really? He said, I've met David Ike and I did read his books. I found

49:58

it fascinating. Well, you would do if you're mad as

49:59

he is. Of course, you would. That's what happens

50:02

when you know when you get people who

50:04

are rich, they attach themselves to different sort of sex and they go because one of

50:06

them's gotta be right. He says, if you

50:08

take the reptilian agenda out, there's some

50:10

interesting nuggets

50:12

there. Yeah. Right.

50:14

Okay, dear. Hope you sell tickets for you.

50:16

Bar me as a fruit cake

50:18

concert coming up. A Scrooge traffic warden.

50:21

a ticket for driving in a pedestrian zone as he

50:24

handed out presence. I should think so

50:26

too. I should think so too.

50:28

This isn't Santa Claus. This man is

50:30

a fraudster. Claus

50:32

at all. He was just driving in

50:34

a pedestrian zone. He's seventy five.

50:36

He was wearing his festive outfit.

50:40

Okay. When he parked his three wheeler bike, which pulls

50:42

the sleigh. He was giving

50:44

out sweets and teddies to kids.

50:48

I don't think

50:49

so. I don't think so. And collecting

50:50

donations for a children's charity when he

50:52

was hit. With a fixed penalty notice,

50:55

pictures show the warden issuing

50:57

him at sixty pound fine outside the guildhall

51:00

in Worcester. Chiki Meike

51:02

who lives in the city, told the warden

51:04

you're going on the naughty list, and

51:07

Disappointed, but I'm not gonna stop me.

51:09

I've been doing it for years. I refused to

51:11

take the ticket. I told the warden send it to

51:13

me in the post. He

51:15

said, where's that? Which he would.

51:17

And and this this bloke goes. It's the North

51:19

Pole. I will go to court dressed

51:21

as father Christmas. You're

51:24

mad, aren't you

51:24

completely mad or worse to cancel?

51:26

Spokesman said they couldn't comment on

51:29

individual cases but confirmed the fine was

51:31

for driving in a pedestrian eyesed

51:34

zone. Absolutely, he deserved. And in fact,

51:36

it goes to court, double the

51:38

fine. You can't drive a three wheeler

51:40

motorized vehicle in

51:42

the potash dry zone. It's just not on. You could hit

51:44

disabled people or anything

51:46

like that.

51:49

This is LVC from

51:52

Global, leading Britain's conversation

51:55

with Steve Allen. Morning,

51:58

nice heavy

52:02

company. It's three

52:02

and a half minutes past. It's still

52:06

freezing cold. Fraser, my hands this morning just went from sort

52:08

of typical sort of

52:10

pink lemonji kind of color to sort

52:12

of white

52:14

and blue. Absolutely freezing. David

52:16

says Steve, a friend of mine who is registered

52:18

blind, says the station

52:21

staff for fish refer to

52:23

him as a VIP, as in visually

52:26

impaired person. He quite

52:28

likes it.

52:29

As he feels important for a brief moment. It's worth it to feel

52:32

important. I I really like I

52:34

really like it, actually. And

52:36

and Kim says having bothered with my new

52:38

fancy prancy phone. I

52:40

can't send MMS text on it

52:42

at the moment. So I'm back to this old

52:44

dinosaur phone. Minus ten

52:46

degrees here, she says, minus

52:48

ten degrees. Freezing.

52:50

It's too cold, isn't it? Minus ten? I didn't

52:52

like minus ten. But as I said, when I

52:54

got on the bus yesterday to go

52:56

home, I found myself a seat, which we're

52:58

quite but I typically pick the one by the door.

53:00

So every time the door opens to let people on

53:02

and off, you know, I got a blast

53:04

of cold air. It was very, very cold,

53:08

very cold, But today, there's gonna be less buses, still no

53:10

trains, but, you know, we managed it

53:12

before. We've managed it before. We'll do

53:14

it again this time around. The papers

53:16

have said, You

53:18

know, you've lost it

53:20

lynch. That's what the sun have said in there for a

53:22

period. He doesn't feel he's

53:24

lost it. He does we know what

53:26

he's doing. He's a union leader who's trying to

53:28

get more money. They've offered some

53:30

money. He says it's not enough, and it's not just

53:32

the money. It's the working conditions as well, but

53:34

they've got to bring themselves up to date if

53:36

they don't bring themselves up to date the whole system will just collapse. And

53:38

when you got that ridiculous text earlier

53:40

on from some local John,

53:43

who's sort of saying about what happens with all the staff for there? How

53:45

disabled people? They don't get rid of all the staff. That's

53:48

the thing they're cutting back.

53:50

Probably in your business, they

53:52

cut back. I should imagine, at exactly the same rate, at

53:54

exactly the same rate. Dawn Niesen's column

53:56

today has got a picture of Ollie Murs having a

53:58

spray tan, a very

53:59

unwise picture. Posting a

54:02

picture of his bare bum during a

54:04

supposedly cozy night.

54:06

She says it's all very funny.

54:09

She said, having this picture of Ollie Murs and

54:11

his saggy bum. But if this is a quiet

54:13

night at home, just with the two of them

54:15

who the hell is taking

54:18

the photograph, Well, to be honest with you, I showed the photograph

54:20

to some people who understand these sort of things. They

54:22

went, oh, dear. If your bottom looks

54:24

as bad as that, don't bother

54:26

exhibiting it. And he obviously uses

54:28

sun beds because he's got a tan line on

54:30

this saggy old bit of arse as they call

54:32

it, kind of where they said that from. It's probably one

54:34

of those housewipes of orange county

54:36

or something. And

54:40

question says Dalenysom. Why does the

54:42

RMT boss Mick Lynn

54:44

George dress like the offspring of the craze meets peaky blinders

54:46

and come accompanied by a couple of heavy

54:48

straight out of the gangs to central cast. Every time you

54:50

see got

54:52

a couple of the management figures standing next to him, and she

54:54

she goes on about that. And

54:56

she says all most of us

54:58

know is after two years of canceled Chris

55:01

businesses and Zoom cracker pulling. We want to

55:03

be able to spend time with our loved ones.

55:05

She said strike in January, but for the love

55:07

of God, give us a break over the

55:09

big weekend itself. But they're not interested.

55:11

Not interested. And interestingly

55:14

enough, Katie Price's fifteen year old

55:16

daughter Princess has shared a picture of herself

55:20

looking like her mom did at the same age. Dad,

55:22

Peter Andre, writes, Dawn.

55:24

I think she's growing up too fast. But

55:26

what does he think of his little girl? Princess

55:30

appears to be a natural beauty and so she stays

55:32

that way. Yes. I'm not sure that you should

55:34

put pictures of fifteen year olds up on

55:36

anywhere and go, oh, look, she's putting pictures of

55:38

herself up. And her mother is hardly

55:40

recommended. You know, she's doing what was she saying the other day? She was talking about,

55:42

well, she was kissing ex husband's

55:46

and and basically

55:48

blames everybody for the state she's in.

55:50

She's got another bankruptcy hearing coming

55:52

up because basically she's

55:54

paid nothing. She was told she had a a plan in place,

55:56

and she managed to fend it

55:58

off. And so I think February,

55:59

she's backing

56:02

caught again. So what with all these bits of it? And to be honest with you, what to

56:04

do is say, listen, you're playing this back now.

56:06

Let's sell the house. Alright. So you

56:08

move into into a small tent.

56:12

Or

56:12

something. But if you don't pay your bill, why should the law be different for you than

56:14

everybody else? Shouldn't be any different

56:16

at all,

56:16

ridiculous. She'd been on twelve holidays

56:20

this year. This

56:20

is for a

56:22

bankrupt. It's absolutely outrageous. Outrageous. Steve

56:25

says Taffy Nige. He

56:27

says, always went to Ireland last

56:30

Saturday. Flight cancelled. Take two this

56:32

Saturday morning. And he said, I

56:34

can't do

56:36

that. Penbloeth

56:36

blue is hop happiness.

56:38

Penbloeth happiness. You

56:40

said happy Christmas, that is in it.

56:44

Penberg. Because I probably said something completely rude to every single

56:46

welsh person in the country,

56:48

but blame taffy knife.

56:50

It's as simple as that.

56:52

Also talking about today, Brighton

56:56

Uni, urged staff not to use the word

56:58

Christmas. It's

57:00

too Christian centric, instead call it the winter closure period.

57:02

So there you go. If you

57:04

seriously, she says, find the name. This

57:07

is Dorne Nissen. Of any religious festival,

57:09

Eve, Diwali, Hanukkah offensive. You have to

57:12

question your own level of tolerance

57:14

and diversity. And

57:16

the the other story, there was something that

57:18

they were going to do on dancing,

57:22

the strictly dancing program, the one with

57:24

a limitless

57:26

Because that's about all they've got on the BBC now apart from repeats.

57:28

And they were gonna do a big thing

57:31

on

57:31

ice this weekend. They've

57:33

decided quite wisely young

57:36

people lost their lives on that thin ice,

57:38

not to run it. I mean, because there was no

57:40

way you ever could have run anything like that, people have

57:42

gone, is this not insensitive? And the

57:45

answer is it would have been. Bosch says, how

57:47

are we doing mate? Loving your shows

57:49

all. I've had a rather large

57:51

request for the

57:53

people. Paul no pirate d z DVDs

57:56

that you mentioned me on your show yesterday.

57:58

Yeah. You actually made the papers about,

58:00

I said, I said, I thought you were

58:02

an entrepreneurial person, selling

58:04

porno DVDs to kids at

58:06

school. He says, Ava Blinder will be

58:08

off to the cafe shortly for a nice big breakfast.

58:11

And your DVDs. Actually, I could

58:13

see you doing that. I don't know why. It didn't

58:15

come as any surprise to me whatsoever. We

58:18

used to have kids at school. They used to

58:20

sell us cigarettes. They would sell you cigarettes. They obviously

58:22

were sort of thieves in them. And and they

58:24

were sort of going out, and then they would bring them to

58:26

school and say, you know, whatever it was for a

58:28

cigarette or

58:30

two. And so it was very easy to get into smoking cigarettes at an

58:32

early age. That's why it's interesting over in New Zealand.

58:34

They want to stop kids

58:37

smoking. I don't think you can actually stop.

58:39

Isn't that an infringement of your civil

58:42

liberties? You know, you wanna make sure you know, if you wanna

58:44

smoke smoke, you'll soon realize the the

58:46

downside of

58:48

it. But and I was watching Josie Gibson.

58:51

Sorry?

58:51

You

58:53

die of cancer. No.

58:56

You die of cancer if you smoke cigarettes. That's what you're

58:58

gonna die. You're gonna die of emphysema. You're gonna

59:00

end up cuff coughing your your guts

59:02

up and you're gonna die horribly.

59:04

And it's addictive. So you die. I mean, why would you wanna stick something

59:07

in your mouth? You know, listen to that guy in America

59:09

who does a great thing on Sable

59:12

to Riley, whoever it was, bringing over cigarettes and

59:14

explaining to them what you do. He

59:16

said you take this pile of leaves

59:19

And he said, you said,

59:22

you you rolled them up. He said,

59:24

and you put a little bit of paper rather. He said, then

59:26

you put them in your mouth. And

59:28

then you set fire to them

59:30

and inhaled with smoke. And I

59:32

remember thinking to herself, that's exactly what

59:35

it was. You know, that's exactly what it was. He was

59:37

setting fire without realizing because everybody smoked

59:39

in all the films. We used to get

59:41

over here. All the

59:44

films had people smoking, elegant ladies, and ball gout, and all the

59:46

rest of it, oh, done. How are

59:48

you? Blowing all this smoke in

59:50

your face. Happened all the

59:52

time. You know, I don't think I could go

59:54

out without taking

59:56

forty cigarettes out, sixty

59:58

to work. Sixty

59:59

cigarettes to work. You know, we used to look at

1:00:02

the at the Marlborough men. They used for

1:00:04

these guys. They looked mean and moody

1:00:06

and they were butch Four of them

1:00:08

died of smoking related

1:00:10

illnesses. Four

1:00:10

of them died. The original

1:00:13

Marlboro man died of cancer

1:00:15

brought on by cigarettes. Or

1:00:17

kind of an advert is that? And yet still people wanna

1:00:19

smoke. And

1:00:19

believe me, I'm not criticizing because

1:00:22

I was a

1:00:24

cigarette smoker, very heavy cigarette smoker. But when you get

1:00:26

the people who used to promote the Bloomington thing,

1:00:28

you know in America, they used to sell and

1:00:30

it didn't catch on here. I

1:00:33

used to see the adverts in the American magazines and it was a tin of

1:00:35

pouches. You cut the lid off and there was something that looked like

1:00:37

a tea bag and it had tobacco in it

1:00:39

and you chewed it You

1:00:42

put

1:00:42

it in your mouth and you chewed it with chewing tobacco and

1:00:44

you used to get minors years

1:00:48

ago. And

1:00:50

they would spit out. They would spit don't

1:00:52

even comment on it. Don't don't even go

1:00:54

anywhere near the talk about button. Okay. I

1:00:57

want to hear from you at all today. The only sign I want to

1:00:59

hear from you is walking out that door.

1:01:01

Don't turn around now. Don't turn

1:01:03

your back anymore. So very interesting indeed. Steve, you

1:01:05

just said happy birthday. Merry

1:01:08

Christmas says, Jake.

1:01:10

You see, I told you I get it

1:01:12

wrong. I merely repeated

1:01:14

what he said. So pen

1:01:16

pen blue with happiness. It's

1:01:19

happy Christmas. It says Taffy Night, and you're

1:01:21

saying it's happy birthday. He

1:01:24

says, Merry Christmas is

1:01:26

Nadalig Lavan.

1:01:28

I mean, who

1:01:28

I'll probably doubt insulted everybody as

1:01:31

well. I don't care. On that kind of mood

1:01:33

today. I really don't care. I'm more interested in people's

1:01:35

rupping arms over thescrooge traffic ward and

1:01:37

ticketing Santa sleigh. A

1:01:39

Scrooge traffic walden who had no idea who Father Christmas

1:01:42

was. He just knows he's a

1:01:44

bloke. He's on a vehicle

1:01:45

in a pedestrianized zone. It doesn't matter

1:01:47

whether he's handing out suites, excuse me, and things

1:01:49

like that to young people, he's in a

1:01:51

pedestrianized zone. You know, if if you were in

1:01:53

a pedestrianized zone and somebody you get,

1:01:56

excuse me,

1:01:58

You're

1:01:58

not supposed to be here. I've seen

1:02:00

people do it before. It's terrible. Really, really bad. So

1:02:04

the the Line

1:02:06

of Duty, Prince and Princess of Wales, taking a stroll in

1:02:08

Norfolk obviously film back in the summer.

1:02:11

George nine, Charlotte

1:02:13

seven and Louis four, and

1:02:16

a mom and dad all very casual and

1:02:18

they'll be signing. But as I say, who would

1:02:20

Harry be writing cards to?

1:02:22

His father, His

1:02:23

brother, his

1:02:25

three aunties? No. Nobody at all.

1:02:26

I bet you on the thing he doesn't send

1:02:29

a card. And if he does, It'll be

1:02:31

a picture of him and her with from the duke and duchess of Sussex. I

1:02:33

bet you. But they he

1:02:35

he should have

1:02:38

if he if he's gonna do anything like that, he should have done them by now.

1:02:40

They sent out cards early in the royal

1:02:43

family. Nurses asking the public to support

1:02:45

their first ever strike tomorrow absolute

1:02:48

they they, you know, their poultry pay rises

1:02:50

and they stupid amount of money that they earn for

1:02:52

being a nurse. That was why I was so stupid

1:02:55

of somebody called I remember you when he's on a naughty step

1:02:57

now and he'll be forever, you know, saying, you know,

1:03:00

the nurses apparently are

1:03:02

equivalent to the train drivers

1:03:04

if only. If only,

1:03:06

it doesn't it doesn't work like that at all.

1:03:08

Allison's statement has declared

1:03:10

this country no longer deserve to be called

1:03:12

Great Britain because of the appalling state

1:03:14

of health service. If anybody needs

1:03:16

money injected in, it's the health

1:03:18

service. Harry keeps dropping

1:03:20

bombs, yawn, boring, dreary,

1:03:22

dull, go home, stay home, don't

1:03:24

go anywhere. So he's gonna keep exposing royal

1:03:26

secrets. He's mulling over offers,

1:03:28

mulling over offers, just wave money in front of

1:03:30

him. You know how tempted he is by the smell

1:03:32

of money. Lucky

1:03:34

I could go there money. And I can spill the beans

1:03:36

on my family because I had such a disastrous

1:03:39

upbringing. Looking at the the

1:03:41

Peak District the other day

1:03:44

and Wynnett pass. The ice you can do. It's the ice. It is

1:03:46

the ice that's killing everybody

1:03:48

nowadays. It's absolutely terrible.

1:03:50

And an

1:03:52

elderly heiress considered to be the last princess in

1:03:54

Hawaii, has died aged ninety

1:03:56

six. Meli

1:03:59

licky mother is on

1:04:02

to say Merry Christmas to you. I

1:04:04

just it took me ages to get around. So

1:04:06

all of a sudden, it just slipped into

1:04:09

my brain. It's good on it. See,

1:04:11

how

1:04:11

many different languages we speak. Leading

1:04:13

Britain's conversation, LBC,

1:04:16

with

1:04:17

Steve Hallum. Following a pretty nice

1:04:19

heavy company, Wednesday, December the fourteenth,

1:04:22

they've done a taste test. It's not the biggest

1:04:24

taste test in the

1:04:26

mirror today. They've just sampled three frozen turkeys

1:04:27

to decide which one is

1:04:30

the best. And the one that gets

1:04:32

five out of five is

1:04:34

from legal. It's

1:04:36

fifteen pounds ninety nine pence,

1:04:38

and it serves between seven and

1:04:40

eleven people, comes with the

1:04:43

with with giblets. And they say it's the cheapest, but

1:04:45

they've clearly not skimped on quality,

1:04:48

a worthy winner. It also serves

1:04:50

the most

1:04:52

people and we'll go far with leftovers for that customary round of turkey

1:04:54

sandwiches, which you get for weeks

1:04:56

on end. Don't you you cook the turkey and

1:04:58

then you go, oh, what have we got today?

1:05:01

Turkey sandwiches. Well, we've got tamara cold

1:05:03

turkey and pickle. Well, we've got the day

1:05:05

after turkey soup, so it goes on. But

1:05:07

fifteen ninety nine, it gets a rating of

1:05:09

five out of five. Dorne

1:05:12

Newsome says wonderful Wednesday.

1:05:14

It's Wednesday today. I can't believe it's Wednesday.

1:05:18

And she's got the new DailyStyle column today,

1:05:20

talking Mick Lynch as read out she

1:05:22

says by the fab at Steve Allen Show.

1:05:25

It sums it up, doesn't it really? But we all

1:05:27

agreed actually, Dawn, that the picture

1:05:30

of Ollie Murphy's bottom

1:05:32

is awful. I mean,

1:05:33

it it really, you know, in terms

1:05:36

of

1:05:36

shape, design, you know,

1:05:38

speed, you know, ability and all the

1:05:40

rest of it, It was ghastly. I'd have never

1:05:42

have well, I wouldn't anyway, but, I mean, you

1:05:44

know, if that's having a picture taken and

1:05:46

he obviously uses a sunbed and

1:05:49

he puts on his for which is even

1:05:51

worse. Somebody needs to tell him, don't

1:05:53

exhibit that again thing. Thank you very much indeed. We

1:05:55

don't want that sort

1:05:58

of thing. But, yeah, happy birthday over the weekend as

1:06:00

well. As I say, I'm I'm too

1:06:02

polite to say,

1:06:04

you know, old

1:06:06

people are because I think it's I think it's

1:06:08

unnecessary. Very unnecessary. They always put it in the

1:06:10

papers though. Don't know. Steve Allen,

1:06:12

sixty 87272

1:06:16

They always have to put that down in there, whereas you feel

1:06:18

like the journalists who write this stuff at the first

1:06:20

place should put their birthday

1:06:22

in brackets. Make it so much easier.

1:06:24

Rod Stewart has joked he's only been introduced to the menopause by Penny Lancaster

1:06:26

as his previous marriages didn't last

1:06:28

long enough for his wives to reach it.

1:06:32

He's seventy seven. He divorced Rachel Hunter. His

1:06:34

first wife, Alana, ended their marriage in nineteen

1:06:36

eighty four. Now he's a firm supporter of PennEast

1:06:39

campaign to raise awareness of

1:06:42

the menopause. The Trump is it's the clothes he wears.

1:06:44

He's wearing the campus clothes you ever

1:06:46

say. I know he's seventy seven. I know

1:06:48

he's in the business, but I mean,

1:06:50

you know, He's

1:06:52

like an off stage drag queen. He puts these sort of, you know, jackets

1:06:54

on. I told you we saw him in a pub in s

1:06:56

six years ago. Somebody said, oh, Rod Stewart drinks. We

1:06:58

have to go to this particular pub, and

1:07:01

he turned up He did actually go, and he

1:07:03

painted his toe nails black. I mean, I

1:07:06

ask you, what sort of person does

1:07:08

things like that? I'm going

1:07:10

to sneeze. There you

1:07:12

go. And another one. Look at that. One of

1:07:14

which to a kiss. Do you know

1:07:16

Aldi? Have aftershave identical to

1:07:18

creed ventus? No.

1:07:20

It's not. It's not

1:07:22

identical and that's why it's not called Cree Deventers

1:07:24

because they would be sued in the high

1:07:26

court. What they've done is they've done something that

1:07:28

is similar but it's nowhere near nowhere

1:07:30

near crude event or some tabletop. So I've

1:07:32

got another creek I'm wearing at the moment. It's

1:07:34

silver water.

1:07:36

Which is very popular, again, too expensive for the producer. Am I buy a

1:07:38

bottle with my voucher? I don't know. I have to

1:07:40

think about that. My friend, Chris, love,

1:07:44

love, loves turkey sandwiches, and I agree

1:07:46

actually. Turkey sandwiches with a bit of

1:07:48

Branston or a bit of pickily. Or

1:07:51

something like that is just delicious or failing that

1:07:54

just turkey in a baguette.

1:07:56

Hot hot

1:07:57

is very nice. Very

1:07:58

exciting. So, Chris, hope you have a nice, I'm

1:08:01

assuming that you're having family Christmas

1:08:03

this year, to get

1:08:06

You've got to have turkey. I know you you don't have to have turkey, but most

1:08:08

people do have turkey. And I don't know

1:08:10

when it started. I just sort of thought

1:08:12

it was a good idea and it tastes

1:08:14

nice. I like it, but I can't The gravy's gotta

1:08:16

be good. Excuse me?

1:08:18

The gravy has gotta

1:08:21

be delicious. I was like watching

1:08:23

this Christmas party the other day for the folks in Teddington. The gravy looked delicious

1:08:25

and they had Yorkshire Puddings since when

1:08:28

did Yorkshire Puddings

1:08:30

become part of Christmas? Amazing, isn't

1:08:32

it? I mean, I know that the the Turkey tradition

1:08:34

goes back up to provide Henry the eighth or something like that at Seventh or

1:08:37

eighth. And what they did,

1:08:39

they they then decided that

1:08:42

it would be a staple for the festive day

1:08:44

even though most people in this country are

1:08:46

eating goose. Some people are eating duck.

1:08:49

Well, I I can't bring himself to eat

1:08:51

ducks. I can't bring myself to eat goose either. And then, of course, the British Empire discovered the new world.

1:08:56

That's the Americas. And then we when we got

1:08:58

all the all the Turkey sitting in Britain because the Americans go big for

1:09:03

it. Thanksgiving, you Turkey and you get

1:09:05

your cranberry sauce and all the rest of it. But it's it's I mean, I wonder

1:09:07

where who actually came up with that very first one with crispy

1:09:12

roast potatoes, picks in blankets, you know, all the nice

1:09:14

sort of things that go with it. And you just basically, you know, you don't wanna talk when

1:09:16

you really just wanna shovel

1:09:18

it down as quick as possible.

1:09:20

Looks really good. There's a picture of

1:09:23

some lovely dogs, one called Yuki, one called Cooper, one called Milli, and

1:09:25

one

1:09:28

called And they've been rescued by the

1:09:30

humane society international and a local group called life.

1:09:36

And this company based in Hampshire found them

1:09:38

owners after they arrived in April. These were dogs that were farmed

1:09:42

to be killed. They eat dog meat

1:09:44

in in Korea. And so this is

1:09:46

the first time that these dogs

1:09:48

and there are

1:09:51

thousands in over in Korea. And they literally I

1:09:53

mean, it's it's too horrendous to even tell you the way that they they

1:09:56

end their lives, but

1:09:58

it's it's not good.

1:09:59

Strangely enough, one

1:10:02

and

1:10:02

a half million. Dogs are still kept on farms despite the fact that eighty four percent of

1:10:04

South Koreans

1:10:06

don't eat dog meat and

1:10:09

sixty percent back a ban. And yet they still got them though. They have

1:10:11

special festivals they

1:10:12

just

1:10:15

eat dog meat. And, you

1:10:17

know, the argument is, well, you eat cow, you eat I mean, in

1:10:19

in Shanghai, I

1:10:23

think they had a cat restaurant where cats were

1:10:25

in cages and they cooked cats and people ate them. They just look

1:10:28

on it as a as a food

1:10:30

source. They have them as pets as

1:10:32

well. But everything. There

1:10:34

is nothing that is not eaten. So let's say the only thing that legs that which isn't eaten is a table.

1:10:36

The rest of it

1:10:38

is just sort of eaten.

1:10:42

What else we got? Richard e Grant

1:10:44

has revealed he hit a pair of boxer

1:10:46

shorts on top of a wardrobe while staying

1:10:48

at the late queen sandringing a mistake, only

1:10:50

to find them freshly laundered the next day. That's what they do with all your clothes. If you go to sandring them

1:10:54

or any of the

1:10:56

the royal family residences. You've been invited for Christmas or whatever it

1:10:58

happens to be. They will unpack all your clothes. They will press

1:11:01

them and iron them.

1:11:03

And when you finish, They

1:11:05

will press and iron them again. They'll all be laundered, folded,

1:11:07

and beautifully put back together in your suitcase. You

1:11:10

need to do nothing.

1:11:14

It's like it's like having sort of servants

1:11:16

around you, but just for

1:11:18

you, just for you. And

1:11:21

So, wait a minute. Very posh lunch today, even

1:11:23

posh than ours, says it

1:11:26

says my friend, Chris.

1:11:28

Oh,

1:11:28

the my friend chris oh

1:11:31

I won't say I won't say who is having

1:11:33

lunch with, so it's a posh one. I mean,

1:11:35

how could it be posh than

1:11:37

our lunch? How

1:11:39

is this possible? But I'm

1:11:41

sure it will be absolutely fantastic.

1:11:43

And Dorne Nissam says, wait a

1:11:45

minute, come back. Come

1:11:47

back. Come back. I lose all

1:11:50

these things. One one time I get all these all these bits and pieces, but she everybody

1:11:52

the

1:11:52

other day for

1:11:55

all the other things. People

1:11:57

saying nice nice things about birthday. And I think she's just sent me a text, but I don't know

1:11:59

it's disappeared to.

1:11:59

And where she she puts her

1:12:02

age down, I'm still not gonna tell

1:12:04

people. I

1:12:07

think it's terribly rude to tell people. She said mentioning

1:12:09

birthday age fine by me.

1:12:11

She said being, is

1:12:14

fabulous. Better than the alternative.

1:12:16

Absolutely. Better than the

1:12:19

alternative. Alright. She's fifty

1:12:21

eight. There you go. She's fifty eight. She's ten

1:12:23

years younger than I am. This is Crystal. I think people should be allowed to be ten I am. But my friend,

1:12:25

Chris, is definitely going for a

1:12:27

very posh lunch. Honestly,

1:12:31

talk about that. What with the professor Jonathan Charlotte

1:12:33

heading off on Saturday after

1:12:35

his favorite hotel? Which

1:12:38

he'll be lovely and he'll be spending the festive

1:12:40

season out there, just

1:12:42

eating, chatting business things

1:12:44

and probably still sorting out deals.

1:12:46

Which is what he does. Steve, the the comedian did

1:12:49

the cigarette sketch was Bob Newhart, who also

1:12:51

did the the bus driver, which

1:12:53

he alluded to earlier. And David says

1:12:55

your welch pronunciation is good. So if you

1:12:57

like to trace saying happy new year, it's

1:13:00

phonetically, bloeth in

1:13:03

the there with tha. Does that

1:13:04

sound is that

1:13:06

is that possible? So both in there with the.

1:13:09

with that Dilo,

1:13:11

I'd

1:13:11

tell you, this program could just go out in

1:13:13

Welsh Wales. We could do the entire

1:13:15

program in Welsh. Tomorrow,

1:13:18

Japanese, Seve, I used to clear the

1:13:20

steps of snow. From outside the

1:13:22

block I live in, oh, no,

1:13:25

no, no, you mustn't. You mustn't, and

1:13:26

I'll tell you why. If you're living in a in

1:13:29

a block of flats and you clear the snow

1:13:31

and somebody trips over, they'll sue

1:13:33

you. There was a lady who used to

1:13:35

clear the snow on the pavement outside her house so she

1:13:37

could get to the car and the council came around and said,

1:13:39

don't do that.

1:13:42

do that Because if anything happened, like somebody

1:13:44

fell over, had an accident, they'd be suing

1:13:46

the council. So she she was told

1:13:49

off about it. So it says, I've

1:13:51

now got bad knee pain, and I couldn't

1:13:53

do it this time because nobody else can

1:13:55

be bothered to do it. The steps

1:13:57

are so icy. I'm now trapped in

1:14:00

my flat. Yes. That is the problem,

1:14:02

actually. Apparently, says John and Croixin, painted toe nails

1:14:04

normally indicate someone with toe

1:14:06

nails toe nails fungus. Very

1:14:09

common and unsightly. What painting them back? I mean, I've seen I've seen stuff that

1:14:11

you paint on toenails if you end

1:14:14

up with a a toenail

1:14:16

fungus.

1:14:17

hunger But

1:14:19

no, his his his was sort of done for sort

1:14:21

of

1:14:21

loving reasons, I suspect. I don't know quite

1:14:23

people who paint themselves black, you're

1:14:25

very old, isn't it really? My wife's Christmas left over sandwiches

1:14:27

a ridiculous Steve, turkey, sliced sausage

1:14:30

meat, flattened roast potatoes gravely,

1:14:33

bread sauce with toasted bread, right guffed

1:14:35

buster. Well, I can I was with you up until

1:14:37

you got to the sliced sausage meat and flattened roast

1:14:39

potatoes and gravy, Chris. Up

1:14:42

until then, you know, leftover sandwiches, toasted,

1:14:44

toasted sandwiches, very much so. I

1:14:46

can go for things like

1:14:49

that. But, you know,

1:14:51

bread sauce with toasted, definitely not. I want one

1:14:53

of those things that we talked about the other day, which was a a foot

1:14:55

long sausage. Actually, in the baguette, they'd hollowed out

1:14:57

the baguette and put the foot

1:14:59

long sausage in. That was very

1:15:01

very nice indeed. I like to I like that. We'll come back. We'll talk

1:15:03

about this significant move. New Zealand

1:15:05

becoming the first country in

1:15:08

the world. To

1:15:10

introduce a lifetime ban on youngsters smoking. Apparently, anybody born on or after first

1:15:12

two thousand and nine will never

1:15:14

be allowed to buy tobacco products.

1:15:19

The minimum age for smoking is eighteen, but that

1:15:21

will keep steadily rising. So

1:15:23

in other words, somebody trying to

1:15:25

buy cigarettes in fifty years would need

1:15:27

to show that they were sixty

1:15:29

three. They want to make the country smoke free by twenty

1:15:31

twenty five. Yeah. A bit odd, isn't it

1:15:33

really? Very strange. Yeah. I

1:15:35

mean, I like the sentiment. I

1:15:39

just don't think they're going

1:15:40

to they're gonna work it out.

1:15:42

Although somebody set the health minister,

1:15:44

doctor Ayesha Varel says

1:15:46

there is no good reason

1:15:48

to allow a product to be sold to

1:15:50

kill half or use it. Well, pretty much what banned booze at the same time, then exactly the

1:15:55

same thing. Probably as many alcoholics there are, you know, people who

1:15:57

who smoke. Jane says, very good welsh.

1:15:59

Very good welsh. Gaylek

1:16:02

next or is it garlic?

1:16:04

I think

1:16:04

it's Gaylek, isn't it? I'm pretty certain. But yeah. I

1:16:06

mean, III could chuckle the wall actually. You could put There

1:16:09

was a a woman Is it a woman on this?

1:16:11

Oh, it's a bloke on Youtube. And

1:16:14

he speaks something like twenty seven languages. He

1:16:16

can have conversations

1:16:17

in twenty seven languages. And I

1:16:19

thought to myself, you know, I'm not

1:16:21

even trying. And all I've managed is

1:16:23

in a happy new year in Welsh and happy birthday and

1:16:25

happy Christmas, but not necessarily in

1:16:28

that order.

1:16:32

Steve

1:16:32

Allo on LVC, text 84850

1:16:35

Bonnie Everett

1:16:36

does the world's fifth

1:16:39

biggest economy need UK aid. Can

1:16:41

you believe that we will

1:16:43

fork out more than eighty

1:16:45

million pounds in handouts

1:16:48

to India? Over the next three years, this

1:16:50

adds to the three hundred million already dished out since twenty eighteen to the fifth largest

1:16:53

economy in

1:16:56

the world. Twelve

1:16:56

million was spent on

1:16:58

helping India adapt to climate change. Hundred and six thousand

1:17:01

on improving mango

1:17:03

and horseradish production and

1:17:06

the list goes on. In

1:17:08

the last four years, India has received two

1:17:10

hundred and eighty eight million pounds in aid

1:17:12

from the UK or four. What

1:17:15

for?

1:17:16

They're richest creases. They're the

1:17:18

world's fifth biggest economy. Do they

1:17:20

really need all this aid?

1:17:22

They've got to three million spent on

1:17:24

improving the skills of Indian

1:17:27

bureaucrats. Two hundred and thirteen thousand on

1:17:27

devising new methods

1:17:31

to measure inequality. Twelve million help

1:17:34

people in three of India's poorest states overcome climate shocks.

1:17:39

Thirty eight million on loans

1:17:42

to private sector led infrastructure projects such as electricity, and transport.

1:17:45

Absolutely ludicrous.

1:17:48

Absolutely ludicrous. We

1:17:50

should keep handing on this money. As I say, I wouldn't mind

1:17:53

if they were poor all the way through,

1:17:55

but they're not. That's it. What

1:17:58

have we got here?

1:18:00

One of the obituaries for the late

1:18:02

actress Ruth

1:18:03

Madrick describes how she won her

1:18:05

best known role in the

1:18:07

nineteen eighty sitcom Heidi, high,

1:18:09

whilst appearing on that most well she plays under Milkwood. By her countrymen,

1:18:11

Dylan Thomas, she was invited

1:18:14

to audition for the role

1:18:17

of the holiday camp yellow coat, Gladys

1:18:19

Pugh, by the writing team Jimmy Perry and David Croft, Ruth later recalled, David said

1:18:21

to me to always speak

1:18:24

like that. I

1:18:27

got the

1:18:27

job and the rest is history. Her modern day equivalent

1:18:29

would have probably been denounced or

1:18:32

denouncing him

1:18:34

as a racist. It's true actually if you think

1:18:36

about it. Do you all speak like that? Can

1:18:38

you sort of hidey hang? Oh, she was so

1:18:41

good. I was watching her last night actually. And

1:18:43

and very good she was too.

1:18:45

She was absolutely perfect. Absolutely

1:18:47

perfect. So Stephen Bear

1:18:50

could be locked

1:18:50

up after he was found guilty of sharing a video

1:18:52

of him having sex with his ex

1:18:55

girlfriend on a website and they made money

1:18:57

out of it. I mean, you can't believe

1:18:59

the stupidity of these people. But, you

1:19:01

know, perhaps he will if he sent

1:19:03

to prison for the festive season because he might be.

1:19:05

Also, many disabled and less mobile passengers miss summer flights

1:19:08

at Heathrow due

1:19:11

to the airport's unacceptable accessibility service.

1:19:13

Says the Civil Aviation

1:19:15

Authority, Bristol, Luton, Leeds,

1:19:18

Bradford airports were also criticized The

1:19:20

news came after amputee and private

1:19:22

Britain award winner, Tony Hodul. Eight of Kent waited

1:19:25

five hours at Gatwick

1:19:27

for his wheelchair. To be unloaded off

1:19:29

the plane. And they all they did, they just said, oh, we're very sorry about that. Very sorry. And he because

1:19:32

he had his legs

1:19:34

taken off some years ago.

1:19:37

Also, Church of England transgender guidance aimed at children as

1:19:39

young as five must be axed. So say

1:19:44

Christians, is a petition signed

1:19:46

by fifteen thousand Christians want valuing All God's children guidelines banned.

1:19:52

So the document provides

1:19:54

policies on how to respond to alleged homophobic, biometric

1:20:00

and transphobic, bullying to four thousand seven hundred

1:20:02

primaries. Nigel and Sally Roe claim an Isle of White. C of

1:20:04

E school used to tell them

1:20:06

and their six year old son

1:20:09

they'd be transphobic if they didn't

1:20:11

believe in transgender affirming policies. In September, the Rose forced to

1:20:14

review of school trans

1:20:16

guidance. After

1:20:18

suing the Department of Education, mister

1:20:20

Rose said the church must

1:20:22

urgently recognize the significant concerns

1:20:25

so many parents have about the

1:20:27

dangers of trans ideology in schools.

1:20:29

So it went

1:20:30

on. A church spokesman said

1:20:33

it

1:20:33

would engage with a government

1:20:35

consultation and would continue to offer clear guidance on how to ensure

1:20:37

all children are treated with the dignity

1:20:39

they deserve. It takes a long time

1:20:41

to move people, doesn't it? An awful

1:20:44

long time. Tony

1:20:46

Beak says he'll be toe tapping side by side with the spirit of Sabrina's foresight.

1:20:52

Yeah. There'd

1:20:54

only be one one Bruce in. It certainly

1:20:56

ain't you as the second one. Dialging judge said it'd be

1:20:58

emotional going on stage at the palladium, which has the

1:21:00

late host

1:21:02

ashes buried underneath. Yes, he's been

1:21:05

underneath since he died. He was cremated and

1:21:07

part of his ashes were put under

1:21:09

these stage the London Palladium. He said, I'm

1:21:11

truly gonna have Brucey by my side. As

1:21:13

I walk out, he'll be with me. Yeah.

1:21:15

But he's he's doing I think he's

1:21:17

doing a plateau actually, but he can't sing. And he's never done plateau before.

1:21:19

It's like the the other one that we said the

1:21:22

other day, Matt Baker. One of

1:21:24

my neighbors went to see it with the children

1:21:26

and said, hey, it's very loud, the pantomime in Richmond Theatre, very, very

1:21:29

loud. Second is like

1:21:31

a variety show. There's a juggling, there's

1:21:34

a magician, you know, and Matt Baker doesn't sing. Does not sing.

1:21:38

So that's it. And you can rock around the Christmas tree with the annual festive

1:21:40

number one turning seventy. There's a look

1:21:42

back in the paper to the wonderful

1:21:45

and weird history of the pop charts most prestigious slot of

1:21:47

the year. We're taking odds on, aren't we? Who's gonna

1:21:50

be there? We had mister Blobby. We

1:21:52

got to number

1:21:54

one in ninety three. The

1:21:56

Band Aid Stars, do they know it's Christmas? That's

1:21:58

coming back only. This time, it's with Lad baby. And we'll wait

1:21:59

and see

1:22:02

what they've actually done to the soul, but they've had number one for the last goodness

1:22:04

knows how long. So I think they

1:22:06

might actually might actually go for it

1:22:09

again, and I think they probably might would

1:22:11

about four or five different contenders including Sutti and Matt

1:22:14

Goss is doing something

1:22:16

for Christmas. But I mean,

1:22:18

you can't compete with Lad They've

1:22:20

got it tucked down to their

1:22:22

belt. They really have, but the X appeal from two thousand and five to

1:22:26

twenty fourteen twenty fourteen Winters

1:22:28

of the X Factor bagged the coveted

1:22:30

Christmas number one position seven times, including four times in a row

1:22:32

between two thousand five

1:22:35

and two thousand eight. Because it

1:22:37

got all the coverage on the television.

1:22:39

That's the only reason that they did really, really

1:22:41

well because you remember hallelujah by Alexander Burke, Shane

1:22:43

Ward, that's my goal. That

1:22:46

sold more than three hundred

1:22:48

thousand copies in two

1:22:50

days. The last x factor Christmas

1:22:52

chart topper was something I

1:22:54

need by than Hey Now in twenty fourteen, but

1:22:56

they've had everybody. Some of the biggest

1:22:58

names in pop music

1:22:59

have been number one

1:23:01

at Christmas, including Elvis Presley with

1:23:04

Return to Sundar, Tom Jones with

1:23:06

a green green grass of home,

1:23:08

David Bowie, whose mashup

1:23:10

Jwett with Bing Crosby, Peace on Earth, Little

1:23:12

Drummer Boy, could only make number three an Abba

1:23:14

who peaked at number two in nineteen seventy

1:23:18

nine. Surprisingly, Some

1:23:18

of the songs that just missed out last

1:23:20

Christmas by wham had the

1:23:22

bad luck to be up

1:23:25

against Band Aid. So that didn't really

1:23:27

help wizards. I wish it could be Christmas every

1:23:29

day, but you can't go into a shot without

1:23:31

hearing it in December. Only reach number

1:23:33

four, in nineteen seventy three, while Jonah

1:23:35

Lewis anti war song, whom is the true to come stop the

1:23:38

cavalry, was up against

1:23:41

the late John Lennon's starting over

1:23:43

and the St. Winifred's choir, there's no one quite light grandma in nineteen eighty

1:23:45

related to number three in

1:23:48

a nineteen four

1:23:50

Mariah Carey's, all I want for Christmas is you,

1:23:53

was thwarted by e seventeen's,

1:23:55

stay another day. Who will it be

1:23:57

this year? I mean, my man is

1:23:59

onlad baby, but I could be wrong. I could be

1:24:01

wrong. It's sort of one of those things. It's it's open. It just depends where sort of people go. It depends

1:24:03

how much coverage they get on the television.

1:24:06

It depends how much coverage they get

1:24:08

on. Different

1:24:10

programs that would play things like

1:24:12

that. I suppose some of the other stations might be

1:24:15

playing it as a as a bit of

1:24:17

a novelty, which is quite good. Message for

1:24:19

Dawn, welcome to the fifty eight club says Kevin The

1:24:21

Milkmann. I joined five months ago and it's

1:24:23

not a bad club to be, and plenty

1:24:25

of experience and not too many aches or pains.

1:24:27

Then you get a bit older actually. Kevin, the restaurant says,

1:24:30

in our butchers, we sell

1:24:32

sandwiches. Best selling on at the

1:24:34

moment, baguette with deep fried turkey

1:24:36

pieces pigs and blankets

1:24:38

in cranberry mayo, very agile, sounds quite nice. I like the sound of that deep fried turkey pieces.

1:24:44

And

1:24:44

then pigs in blankets as well. I'm

1:24:46

not sure about the cranberry mayo, but either way, oh, I tried to get the other day.

1:24:48

I tried to

1:24:51

get

1:24:51

my chatec Halder Had

1:24:54

it chatted cowder, my had it chowder

1:24:56

in Martha Spencer, sold out. Completely sold

1:24:58

out, which I never mentioned it, ridiculous.

1:25:01

Marin said Steve would left over Turkey, get

1:25:03

ready rolled pastry, gin of condensed chicken soup to make the Turkey pie. Love Turkey pie.

1:25:05

Love all of pies

1:25:08

full stop. Greetings

1:25:10

from Ireland. Christine, how are you? My husband, she says, is from Finland. So

1:25:12

here's a a merry

1:25:15

Christmas and a happy New

1:25:18

Year in Finnish, Haifa,

1:25:21

Jolloy, Ya,

1:25:23

On

1:25:24

on a list the

1:25:26

the water Alistair, Ottar, Voorhe. I

1:25:28

bet that was the worst finish you've

1:25:30

ever heard, isn't it? I'm so sorry. I apologize. You're

1:25:32

gonna hang my head

1:25:35

in shame. I'm afraid. I've never

1:25:37

quite understood, Steve, why we give so much money to so many countries. I

1:25:39

always thought that charity begins at home. When we're down on our

1:25:41

buttocks at the moment, we definitely need all the

1:25:43

charity we can get. There

1:25:46

are countries that need money, but there are others that really

1:25:49

don't. He says, who are we

1:25:51

to argue a? Yes, I

1:25:53

know Ash. That is the trouble. Yes. We

1:25:55

give money to India. Millions. Millions of first for

1:25:57

some reason, I've got no idea why. And we've been

1:25:59

doing it for years. It's probably

1:26:01

steeped in the mysteries of time, you know,

1:26:03

to send money to India so that

1:26:06

they can organize mango growing just

1:26:08

shows that we're wasting our

1:26:10

money. It really is. It's a terrible waste. But

1:26:12

we found another couple warring.

1:26:14

This is a decorated army

1:26:17

neighbor for ten years over a country,

1:26:19

then we're told by judges to grow up. They do

1:26:21

they do they're a bit funny these

1:26:23

people. Stephen and Jacqueline G

1:26:26

created a rural hell of Harrisman for the Afghan war hero, Major

1:26:28

Jason Little and his wife, Avril,

1:26:30

after they moved next to

1:26:33

their Dorcet Farm

1:26:35

in twenty twelve, Mister G was filmed

1:26:37

creeping onto their land at night in a balaclava slashing a pool

1:26:39

with a knife to

1:26:43

flood their garden. The retired aircraft engineer

1:26:45

was given a restraining order, and it was all to do with a lane between their

1:26:47

million pound houses. He told

1:26:50

a fuel trucker, one of

1:26:52

them. To get the f

1:26:54

off my land. And he then got a conviction for criminal damage over the pool, only

1:26:56

fueled by his anger as he put

1:26:58

two fingers up to the law. Anyway,

1:27:03

they've been fined. One of them, mister

1:27:05

Gee was given a twelve month jail

1:27:07

sentence suspended for two years. His wife's

1:27:09

ten week sentence suspended for a year,

1:27:11

find a total of two thousand pounds, to pay three thousand pounds

1:27:13

victim surcharge and given an indefinite

1:27:16

restraining order, and they

1:27:18

live next door to each other.

1:27:20

You know, it really is it it's

1:27:22

just ridiculous. They've got an obsession with each other, and it's not not the healthiest. In

1:27:26

fact, one of them kept diverting people away. If they say, oh, if we go

1:27:28

down here, can we go to services properly? No.

1:27:30

No. They don't live there anymore. And so

1:27:32

they they drove delivery drivers on people

1:27:35

who are coming to visit. They

1:27:37

sent them away. Ridiculous in there. I can't believe it. You get these neighborly disputes, and the whole thing

1:27:39

just goes sort of pear shaped, which is not

1:27:42

so good. I see we got another Tory

1:27:44

MPE gone

1:27:47

bankrupt. After a judge heard he owed

1:27:49

about nearly two million pounds.

1:27:51

This is Adam Aphria,

1:27:55

who represents Windsor. He

1:27:56

was at an online insolvency hearing the

1:27:58

other day in a statement.

1:27:59

He said he wouldn't quit

1:28:02

as an MP but would stand down at the next general election.

1:28:04

He owes a million pounds to the

1:28:06

tax man. Well, that's just that's just ridiculous.

1:28:10

And

1:28:10

around seven hundred thousand pounds

1:28:12

to Barclays. He asked for more time to sell a property,

1:28:14

should've done it ages ago, shouldn't you? Obviously, what is

1:28:16

it with these people? They're able to run up

1:28:18

huge debts. Like, you know, the couple in America that

1:28:20

we talked about at the very beginning

1:28:22

of the program. People seem to be able

1:28:24

to borrow money, run up money, and then they have

1:28:27

no intention of paying it back. It's

1:28:29

no good when it goes to court saying,

1:28:31

oh, we will actually start paying it back and I'll be looking at ways. Otherwise, we'd still be

1:28:34

waiting for for Jordan.

1:28:36

To pay the money that she

1:28:39

owes. But so far, very little has been forthcoming, which is rather

1:28:41

a shame. This

1:28:44

is LVC with Steve

1:28:46

Hallum. Morning everybody. I see the late queen has dominated the TV ratings this

1:28:48

year with her

1:28:51

funeral and the Jubilee. The

1:28:54

most watched programs of twenty twenty two.

1:28:56

At number ten was Saturday night

1:28:58

Takeaway, Antrim Tech. That got six

1:29:01

point two million. Britain's got talent.

1:29:03

Pulled six point four,

1:29:03

call the midwife, six point four, the masked singer,

1:29:06

believe it or not, got six point

1:29:08

five. The antique roadshow in

1:29:10

October got six point six. And

1:29:14

then a bit of a jump for

1:29:16

strictly come dancing, eight point seven million. The

1:29:18

Eurovision song contest got eight point nine million.

1:29:21

I'm a celebrity get me out of

1:29:23

here, managed to rake in ten point eight million, the Queen's Platinum Jubilee on June

1:29:28

the fourth. Got

1:29:28

eleven point two million and

1:29:30

the state funeral of Queen Elizabeth the second thirteen point two million. So

1:29:36

miles ahead, miles ahead. Absolutely amazing. I

1:29:38

think she'd be very thrilled actually. Very, very thrilled. Plus one point three

1:29:40

million the

1:29:44

EU Qatar scandal raids, the

1:29:46

Belgian prosecutors have revealed this

1:29:50

enormous hole of cash found at three addresses in Brussels after

1:29:52

it launched a probe into suspected

1:29:54

Qatari bribes to officials. Every time

1:29:57

I say that word, Qatari, upcomes

1:29:59

the name David Beth them. I don't know why.

1:30:01

I'll just sort of think to myself. They should have given that money back. They really should. They there's

1:30:03

no point in hanging on to it. It's not gonna do it

1:30:05

any good. And look

1:30:08

at this. The longest

1:30:10

lines of of of packages.

1:30:13

Could you spot

1:30:16

your card here, they've

1:30:18

got I mean, there must

1:30:20

be about two or three hundred,

1:30:22

I think, packages, heading to families, this

1:30:24

Christmas. But the man I'll make it on

1:30:26

time because millions of cards present and parcels that have struned across trolleys. And this was just in Bristol,

1:30:29

the I mean, hundred

1:30:31

and fifteen

1:30:32

thousand members are walking out today. You

1:30:34

got today and tomorrow, not so good plus

1:30:38

Mc Lynch was very unhappy, rattled by

1:30:40

claims he's trying to destroy Christmas.

1:30:42

I shouldn't imagine he cares. I

1:30:45

shouldn't imagine he cares at all Ross Clark

1:30:47

writes here in one of the papers day says Lynch is

1:30:49

the new Arthur Skargill, or there's an old dinosaur, god in heaven, destroying his industry

1:30:51

and his union member's jobs. But

1:30:55

it's the money they're losing. It's the money they're

1:30:57

you know, if they're gonna lose five

1:30:59

to six thousand pound each. You know,

1:31:01

there is it's a no

1:31:03

win situation for them. No win situation.

1:31:05

Because if every time, you know, why didn't it just do a ballot to the

1:31:07

members now without

1:31:07

any intimidation or anything at all? And say, listen,

1:31:10

what do you wanna do? Do you want

1:31:12

to accept the

1:31:14

five and then the four or the four and then the five, which ones

1:31:16

do you want to accept? Do you want to go for

1:31:18

that, you know, nine percent over two years,

1:31:21

you know, and you've got to accept the changes. We need to get

1:31:23

rid of people. It's costing too much money to run it. We're

1:31:25

not sort of making the money we should be making. But

1:31:27

on the other hand, if they're

1:31:29

not making the money they should be making, they're not investing in the railways

1:31:31

at all, and that's the one thing they

1:31:33

need to do. Invest in the railways.

1:31:36

But, you know, while

1:31:38

they keep demanding all this money. They're gonna end up settling, but it won't

1:31:40

be for anywhere near what they want. It'll

1:31:42

be way down the list on the

1:31:46

road, way down. Also, The search for the young stars who refused to

1:31:48

be bowed by cancer. This is

1:31:50

Cancer Research UK star awards, which

1:31:54

celebrate the courage of children diagnosed with cancer.

1:31:56

And they've got all sorts of people,

1:31:58

a seven year old

1:31:59

who

1:32:00

who never complained, and a

1:32:03

guy called Connor Sunderland thirteen with

1:32:05

his swimming medals and

1:32:07

star award. So he's,

1:32:09

you know, it's it's

1:32:11

tough. It's tough. He says, I've felt like a real

1:32:13

star for the day and I'll always remember it. So you should. So you should. And if you've

1:32:15

ever wondered, why

1:32:18

when you go into famous houses or castles or national trust

1:32:21

properties. It's the ceilings which are

1:32:23

decorated, then forget your

1:32:27

table displays. Start hanging things up, things that, you

1:32:29

know, go around, you know, all sorts of bits and pieces that hold your sourcements and everything

1:32:32

else up to the ceiling. And

1:32:34

you can decorate that. Apparently, it's the

1:32:36

latest The

1:32:38