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From Wondery, I'm Sydney Page

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and this is Sydney in the Sheets.

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Today, I'm talking with professional matchmaker,

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Laura Jacobs. At

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["I Never Let You Go"]

1:43

Hello, lovely people, and welcome back

1:45

to Sydney in the Sheets. I'm your host, Sydney

1:48

Page. You can also join me in the Sheets

1:50

each week on YouTube to watch me recording

1:52

my podcast right from my bedroom. And

1:54

I'm so excited about my merch store full

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2:17

You're listening to the second

2:20

part of my wonderful interview with

2:22

Laura Jacobs from Sync Matchmaking.

2:25

So I have to ask you, so like,

2:28

Do you and your husband have an age

2:30

gap? And what's your opinion? Or

2:33

sorry, your fiance. Yeah.

2:36

In my mind, I'm like, you're living there. He's my husband

2:38

to me. We say that

2:40

all the time. It's a piece of paper. At

2:42

that point, especially, you're locked in. Have

2:44

you seen the ring on your finger? By

2:46

the way, for people that are not watching this YouTube, that

2:48

ring is insane. Thank you.

2:50

It's gorgeous. It's absolutely beautiful.

2:54

I was like, this is huge. That

2:57

is literally insane. Like that's

2:59

like, I'm- I wasn't expecting

3:01

it. I don't even wear it out very often unless

3:03

I'm with him. Cause I'm so paranoid. I'm

3:06

like, someone's gonna buy me. I mean, it's huge. Yeah.

3:09

It's beautiful. I also like, it's so funny.

3:11

I grew up like watching like millionaire matchmaker and

3:13

it was like my favorite show. And so when

3:15

I like got to high school and college, I would always try to like

3:17

set up my friends. Like even now I set people

3:20

up. I just did an episode where I was talking

3:22

about how sometimes like, especially

3:24

in a city like New York where you might date a lot,

3:26

like you go on a lot of first dates. A lot of times,

3:29

I've

3:30

realized

3:32

halfway through a date, I'm like, oh my god, this guy would get along

3:34

so much better with my friends. It's

3:37

always a crazy thing to say to people,

3:39

but I'm like, seriously, I think

3:41

that sometimes when someone's pre-vetted,

3:43

you're just automatically more comfortable around them. It's

3:46

worked out in the past, I've actually successfully

3:49

gotten people together through that method. Yeah,

3:51

that's what I say to clients because they think matchmaking

3:54

is so serious and like

3:56

yeah, I take my job seriously but I'm like, at the end

3:58

of the day, you're me. through

4:00

a trusted friend, your matchmaker. That's

4:02

what I want to make this experience for you. It's like

4:04

being set up on a date through a friend. You

4:06

would go on a date if your friend told you exactly

4:08

someone's good for you. But I want

4:11

to answer your earlier question too, age gap. Because I

4:13

think it's important. Yeah,

4:15

we have like a seven and a half year

4:17

age gap, almost eight year age gap. And I

4:19

actually think that's

4:21

really ideal personally.

4:23

You know, I coach a

4:25

lot of women who again, they're in their

4:28

30s, they're 37, and they're like, I don't

4:30

want to date anyone older than 40. You're

4:32

doing yourself a disservice. Does it

4:35

really matter if he's 45 or 46 but looks

4:37

great? No.

4:41

And men that are older, they're

4:43

more mature. They're ready for stuff. They're ready

4:45

for the next life path. It's like men

4:47

are super funny. Until a man

4:49

has his life together, he's not thinking about

4:52

a girl. He might have room for a girlfriend,

4:54

but he does not have room for a wifey,

4:56

for kids, for the whole kid in caboodle.

4:58

So really, I mean, especially now

5:00

in our study, like life is so expensive, men

5:03

in their 20s and 30s, they are working.

5:05

They are working on working. Like it

5:07

is pretty rare that the girl they

5:10

meet in their like college or 20s, that

5:12

they're gonna marry that girl. Unless that's a

5:14

really strong couple, I've seen it in smaller

5:16

towns to grow together. Otherwise they're like,

5:18

I'm focused on work and I

5:20

don't have room for that like serious relationship.

5:23

So, you

5:24

know, a lot of these women are like, oh, like me

5:26

and my boyfriend are both 33 and he's

5:28

not ready to commit, what do I do?

5:30

Break up with him and date someone older. That's

5:32

what you do. You're not changing his

5:35

ass. He's 33 and he is

5:37

focused on work as he should be. So it's

5:39

unfortunate and women take it personal and it's not

5:41

personal. You're just there at the wrong time. The taxi

5:43

cab light isn't on. Yep, literally

5:46

I talk about that all the time where I'm like, and

5:48

I was saying, I was having conversation with a lot of my

5:50

guy friends because I would say for the most part,

5:53

all of my friends are at least 27, 26 and up.

5:57

like probably like up to 40 like that's real

6:00

like my friend age ranges.

6:03

And so like most of my guy friends in like the early 30s, like

6:05

I always ask them, I'm like, you

6:07

know, I think guys are so hilarious,

6:10

because they never want to be the first

6:12

one to like get a serious girlfriend and settle down.

6:14

But like, they also don't want to be the last. Yeah,

6:17

this like bachelor scrambling, like there's

6:19

pressure at both ends. And it's so funny,

6:21

like, as soon as their friends start getting married, they're

6:23

like, Oh, like, maybe I do want like a wedding

6:25

date. Like, it's cool to like take someone

6:28

drunk home from a wedding like the first three times

6:30

you do it, but it gets old really fast. It

6:32

gets like it gets old quickly. And then they suddenly

6:34

be like, Oh, you know, maybe I do want

6:37

like a serious girlfriend to like, come bring

6:39

with me and maybe I do want to

6:42

not be alone all the time and like have

6:44

something routine and it's

6:46

like it's so weird watching them change.

6:48

But like you can you actually see it. It's the

6:50

weirdest thing. Yeah, it's embarrassing to me

6:53

that last struggling bachelor

6:55

guy. Like, oh, yeah. Yeah, so embarrassing.

6:58

I also think that something that's helped my mindset

7:01

in dating and I would love your opinion on this,

7:03

but I think for me,

7:06

it's sometimes like the other

7:08

part about dating older is like I think the expectations

7:10

like for every age group is a little bit different.

7:13

Like if I was dating someone who was 23,

7:15

I'm not thinking I'm going to get the same thing as someone

7:17

who's 33. That's just common sense. But

7:19

what's funny is I feel like when you date someone older,

7:22

you're able to demand more

7:25

for yourself because

7:28

of the fact that you look at their behavior

7:30

and something that you might be more open to tolerating

7:32

from someone who's like 23. When they're 33, like that's

7:35

embarrassing. Yeah, this is embarrassing

7:38

for you. Like you grow up like it

7:40

it's, and it honestly is really helped

7:42

my mindset. It's really helped me like get over things

7:45

and

7:46

deal with all of that sometimes.

7:49

Yeah, for sure. I mean, I'm

7:51

not a big like advocate for a huge

7:53

age gap. I definitely I want to say that. Like

7:55

I've seen some weird stuff

7:57

of really old guys dating girls in their 20s. He's

8:00

not just an insecure loser, to be honest,

8:02

that wants to date someone naive. But

8:04

I think up to

8:05

a ten-year gap is good. It's

8:08

good for women to

8:08

be with someone. Plus,

8:10

you're going to look young and hot your whole life,

8:13

and he's always going to be like, look at my beautiful

8:15

wife. But yeah, anything

8:17

more than that, it's pushing it

8:20

for me. Yeah. I've never... Tennis

8:23

is my ceiling. Yeah, tennis is like max. Like

8:25

max. Yeah. I literally had

8:28

a few weeks ago, I had a matchmaker reach out

8:31

and they tried to set me up with someone

8:33

who is over double my age

8:35

and had an 11 year old son.

8:38

Like that is, and they were like, this is such a good

8:41

opportunity for you. And I was like, in

8:44

what world? I'm dating really great

8:46

guys. I'm going to a matchmaker to

8:48

find someone who's possibly better. I'm

8:50

not looking to be a stepmom to someone

8:52

who's half my age right now. No,

8:54

I mean, and that's why part

8:56

of why I become a matchmaker, like a lot of them, I

8:58

hate to say it, they have no integrity, they don't care.

9:01

Like, at what point are you crossing the line

9:03

and, you know, trying to hook up, you know, how

9:05

old are you, 23?

9:07

A 23 year old was something like,

9:09

that's, that's like criminal to me. Like it's

9:11

like, come on, like, you know, I saw

9:13

you in the database. I thought you're so cute. I followed

9:16

you on Instagram. I don't have anybody for you. My clients

9:18

are too old right now. Like, but I'm keeping you in

9:20

mind because somebody might come along who's 30,

9:22

you know, right? Like that's, I saw her, I

9:24

saw you, I'm like, okay, someone 30, like tops

9:27

for her, that's good. Like have some integrity

9:29

with your job, you know, if you're, I also

9:31

just like won't even take clients like that, like I just

9:33

won't. Like I've had guys

9:36

offer me hundreds of thousands of dollars,

9:39

you know, very wealthy billionaire types

9:41

in their 50s and 60s and they only want to date 20s,

9:43

I'm like, I'm not doing that, go somewhere else. That's,

9:46

I need to sleep at night and that's

9:48

not gonna do it for me. And they're like,

9:50

yeah, I'll pay you this much. I'm like, I don't care.

9:52

Like I don't know. I'm not interested in signing a contract with

9:54

the devil. Like I need to sleep at night

9:56

and that's wrong and you're gross. your gross that

9:58

you go for gross.

10:00

years younger, you're gross. It's

10:02

gross. And it's like so upsetting. And

10:04

it's like the weird it's like so slimy.

10:06

Yeah. And I will like and I actually I got

10:08

it was I got like a little frustrated because I was like, I'm

10:11

actually really uncomfortable with that nor do I think

10:13

it's like fair to this guy. Like I think you know,

10:15

he'd want to be out with someone who's like excited

10:17

to be with him. And like, I can't provide

10:19

that. And like, you know, that's

10:21

great. And they were like, um, but like,

10:24

he's like such a great guy. Like there's no reason

10:26

to be uncomfortable. I'm like, he's almost my

10:28

dad's age. Like there is a reason

10:30

to I mean, this man I think was like 46 or 47.

10:32

Like

10:34

literally, like an insane.

10:37

Yeah, just where you're

10:39

like, I'm sure he's lovely. Like my friends who

10:41

are older, like I'd send him, I'd

10:44

send him that way. But I was like,

10:46

what would I what are we going to talk about? What

10:48

are we going to relate on? You

10:50

know, like, why would he want to to

10:53

bring me around his friends who

10:56

are like that. Just like, you know?

10:58

It's some weird flex to them. Again, I just won't

11:00

even take clients like that,

11:01

but I just, it's not

11:03

acceptable to me. Like there's so many things

11:06

you don't know as a 23 year old

11:08

girl that you'll find out later

11:11

that it's just like,

11:11

it's just gross that these guys try

11:14

to exploit that and do that and hire

11:16

a matchmaker,

11:16

you know, who will do that. I mean, it's just, it's

11:19

not really something I'll participate in. Again, like part

11:21

of our process is we always talk guys. What

11:23

age will you date? What's your max age? And

11:25

if they're too ridiculous,

11:27

I'm not doing it.

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12:44

I so

12:47

respect the way that you run

12:50

your personal matchmaking

12:53

as well as sync, just because you can

12:55

really like see the difference between like a lot

12:57

of like it if you do like a little bit of digging

12:59

on like a lot of

13:01

companies or people like you can find

13:03

out pretty quickly like the type of people

13:05

that they're setting up like you'll know

13:07

I think from like a first few like intro

13:09

conversations like whether or not you'll probably

13:12

find someone there. Oh, yeah. And

13:14

also like I've had terrible,

13:16

you know, experiences when I was living

13:18

in New York before I started

13:19

matchmaking, which wanted me to like

13:21

made me want to get into But I

13:23

had this one company, I mean, I've never been so

13:25

mad at my life at them. They

13:28

set me up on a couple of dates and they don't

13:30

show photos. So that's number one red flag of a

13:32

matchmaker, if they won't show photos.

13:34

I was like, that was like 27, 28. So

13:36

I was like, okay, I'll go on the date. They're

13:38

like, yeah, he's really, I was like, describe him

13:40

to me. First of all, it's not fair. They're definitely

13:42

showing him my

13:44

photo.

13:45

So it's a double, so they're just trying

13:47

to get you to go on the date and they're making tons of money

13:49

from you going on that date. And

13:52

she told me this guy was like 6'1", handsome,

13:54

American, like, you know, very wealthy,

13:57

like, early, early

13:59

ford. and I was like, okay,

14:01

it's a little older than I go, but I'll go on the

14:03

date for you, like I'll see, and he sounds great.

14:06

I showed up, I was so embarrassed.

14:09

Like, I'll never forget this date. Like, people

14:12

looked at me in the restaurant like I was an

14:14

escort. I was so upset. He

14:16

was like 50s for sure,

14:19

fat,

14:19

bald, sweating. I

14:23

was like, how the hell do I get out of there? And

14:26

I just like sat there and I didn't know

14:28

what to do. and I just

14:30

ate and left and he was just basically

14:33

telling me he'll provide anything I

14:35

want in my life and take care of me and he's

14:37

so wealthy and I'm so beautiful. I was so uncomfortable.

14:40

I called her after, I ripped her a new one. I

14:42

was like, never set me up again. I can't believe

14:44

you lied to me this much and this

14:47

is so wrong of your company. This is a huge company.

14:49

They advertise everywhere. I was like, this is

14:52

so wrong. Remove me, never

14:54

set me up again. She's like, he really likes you.

14:56

I'm like, I don't care, tell them to lose

14:59

my number. Like that was the most embarrassing date

15:01

you ever sent me on. And I never want my girls in that

15:03

situation.

15:04

Like it was, yeah, it was horrible. I

15:07

actually, from like the same

15:09

company that they've showed me like a batch

15:11

of like a few guys. And so I

15:13

actually like sort of like looked into matchmaking

15:16

because my, I have a friend

15:18

who like used a matchmaker and

15:21

she's been like seeing someone and really happy

15:23

and like great. But

15:25

I afterwards her and I were like talking

15:28

and I was like the matches they were like and her and I

15:30

for context, we're like two years apart

15:32

in age and we look very similar.

15:34

Like we'd both like check off the same boxes. So

15:36

someone's like filtering like to see we're both

15:39

under like under 25 blonde. Like

15:42

we look sort of similar. And

15:44

so I was like, I

15:46

said like the name, I was like, did they try

15:48

to set you up with this guy? And she's like, oh my God,

15:50

I went on two dates with him. They told me about how like charismatic

15:53

and nice he was. the creepiest dude

15:55

I've ever had. It's like so awkward,

15:57

so weird. And it's like, I.

16:00

feel like it's so dishonest. But I

16:02

like I can tell that you really have like

16:05

a great set of standards and like you really wanting

16:07

to connect people and not just like,

16:10

get these guys off on Yeah,

16:14

of course I do like it's an integrity point

16:16

for me. But it's also like these matchmakers,

16:19

they underestimate the value of

16:21

their girls of the relationships

16:24

like I have great relationships

16:26

with the single women I help set up in the database.

16:29

I think a lot of matchmakers look at the database

16:31

girls as completely disposable. They

16:34

cater to their clients only and they don't

16:36

care if they have to lie to the girls and

16:40

they play really dirty and it's so wrong. It's

16:42

like these girls don't trust you then. If

16:44

you set up this girl with the wrong guy, she's never

16:47

going to go on another date for you ever again. They

16:49

really underestimate that value. The

16:52

girls that I'm the closest I have a huge network

16:55

of girls I set up. They trust me

16:57

so much. At this point, I always show photos

16:59

in a profile, but my top

17:02

girls that really wanna find somebody

17:03

that are always talking to me and I'm always helping them,

17:06

and they're

17:07

not paying, they're just database, they would trust

17:09

me with anything. I could say, go out with this guy,

17:11

okay, I'll be there. Because the trust is

17:13

so there. They know that I'm not gonna set them up

17:15

with a creep. They're not gonna have a bad time.

17:18

They really trust me. It may not be a romantic

17:20

connection every time, but they

17:21

know that they're gonna be treated with respect by

17:24

a gentleman. And that is just so

17:26

valuable. Yeah, and that's that is so

17:28

I think that's so amazing and so important.

17:31

So as you know, like, as you said this earlier,

17:33

like dating changes with whatever age that

17:35

you are, yeah, what are some things that

17:37

like,

17:38

what are some qualities and a partner that you wish

17:40

that you'd been maybe like looking for sooner?

17:43

matchmaking is like, that making

17:46

like helped you obviously everything worked out amazingly.

17:49

like the way it should. But like, what is like, what

17:52

would you say like the traits are to sort of like save

17:54

like, younger girls or

17:57

single girls like that heartbreak that

17:59

you've gone through.

18:00

Yeah, well, I mean, number one

18:02

in my 20s, I didn't care

18:04

about money at all. And I

18:07

somehow thought that it was like,

18:09

it was wrong to care about money. You

18:11

know, I really did. I thought that was wrong. Like, you

18:13

know, we get so programmed as women, oh, don't

18:16

be a gold digger. Don't be this, don't be that. And

18:18

so I took it too far. And I dated

18:20

like broke dudes. Like I really

18:22

did. Like I took it so far. Like I was

18:24

paying our rent. One of my boyfriends,

18:27

he was like my assistant was like work because

18:29

he didn't have a job.

18:30

like he really was good looking.

18:33

So that was my problem. I would date these good looking

18:35

guys who

18:36

had like no drive and

18:38

I would like pay for everything. I just, it just went

18:41

way too far and the relationship never worked

18:43

because I was the alpha. You know, I was like

18:45

the alpha of the relationship and I

18:47

wonder why I was like, like I

18:50

really don't care about money, but I think

18:53

at some point I had to give my head

18:55

a shake and be like, okay, I have to care a little

18:57

bit. it's not wrong to care

18:59

a little bit. So I will say that. It's

19:01

like, I put up with like so much shit

19:04

because I was like, oh, it's okay that he's broke.

19:06

And I mean, the defining moment for me

19:08

was that particular boyfriend where

19:10

I was paying for everything. He, you know,

19:13

I was acting at the time and we went into my acting

19:15

agency. I went to pick up a check and they're like, oh my

19:17

God, you two are gorgeous together. Do

19:19

you wanna do like, can you guys do

19:21

scenes together? I was like, well, he can't act. And they're

19:23

like, right. But like maybe there's something were

19:26

like a real couple of kisses on a

19:28

set or whatever. Like, we'll keep you guys in mind. I was like, okay.

19:30

So I got us, like the next

19:33

week we got booked on this job

19:35

on the Flash on CW.

19:38

And we were like, it

19:40

was like the storyline. Like I booked the part, it was

19:42

like, I was having an affair on

19:44

my husband in the show with

19:47

my boyfriend at the time. And we

19:49

were like making out on, you know, in

19:51

the set and we were two days of work. We each

19:53

made like $20,000. So

19:56

I was like, I've made him $20,000 now. this

19:58

is great, you know. And we went for dinner that

20:01

night to celebrate and he still wanted me to pay.

20:03

And I was like, we

20:04

are done. Shut up, shut

20:06

up. Yeah,

20:07

so it's like, I just took it too far.

20:10

And I think it also, like I

20:12

think when you are a model and actress in

20:14

your 20s, people assume you're a gold digger

20:16

and I wasn't at all. So I was like, let me prove

20:18

to them that I'm not, you know?

20:20

Let me like, David Brokai and prove

20:22

this. But that was so stupid and there was something

20:25

to prove. And then I would say the second thing

20:27

is like, If he's an alcoholic

20:29

or a drug abuser, leave now. It's never

20:31

changing, honey. Like bye, bye. Like

20:34

I've dated way too many alcoholics and

20:36

I'm like, oh, like, well, yeah,

20:38

like he'll stop. No, he's never stopping.

20:41

It's not just bye. You don't need it. Partying

20:44

is fun at 25, but like when you're

20:46

seeing your 35 year old boyfriend

20:48

just get like drunk out of his mind with

20:50

his eyes looking two directions, it becomes

20:53

a very nauseating thought really

20:55

fast. Yeah, like a moment where you're like, okay,

20:59

what's going on here? And

21:02

I also am just like, I

21:04

mean, I have a million questions for you just

21:06

because I am so interested in

21:08

matchmaking. And I think what you do is really

21:11

amazing. Do you think preferences

21:13

really help people or sometimes do we

21:15

not know ourselves at all? Like in

21:17

terms of like finding a partner? Like do you think like, when

21:20

you're if you were like on hinge, and you're like,

21:22

I'm putting like, this tight or like

21:25

this type of guy. Do you think that that's

21:27

like helpful a lot of the time or like, it's

21:29

actually like hurting us in our like,

21:31

search for love? Yeah, I think it's

21:33

hurting you. I think people

21:36

have too many requirements. So I always

21:38

say like, okay, what can we

21:41

narrow down? What is an absolute

21:43

deal breaker? And like, what can you not live

21:45

without, you know, and it's like, yeah,

21:47

I think the you know, the settings

21:49

on the apps are definitely harmful because,

21:52

you know, we're like, Oh, I wouldn't date over this age or

21:54

I wouldn't date under this height and it's like what if

21:56

your soulmate is instead of 6-1, he's 5-11 and he's...

22:00

45 instead of 43 and you didn't meet him.

22:04

Or the distance too. People set their distance

22:06

like 25 miles. I mean, do you really

22:08

think you're gonna door dash a soulmate, you

22:10

think he lives that close to you? Are you actually

22:12

kidding?

22:13

Like, I just find

22:15

it so funny. I'm like, I'm glad you could

22:18

be geographically picky like that, you know?

22:20

You should set your apps as far as they'll

22:22

go on location.

22:24

You should be more open on height. I'd

22:26

say, I think if you're looking for a mat,

22:28

put it at least a five nine. you really don't

22:30

know. He could be amazing. Don't make

22:32

you know, if you're really make an exception for

22:34

it, you know, like meet him, you never know. And

22:37

then age I go like a couple years older because you

22:39

also never know. Yeah. And I

22:42

always remember Patty talking about this on the show.

22:44

So that's why I have to ask you. I like

22:46

it just brought back.

22:50

Obviously, I know like this is sort of a controversial

22:52

thing to talk about nowadays. But I

22:54

do want to know like, do you recommend

22:57

like, what What do you tell your clients when it comes to

22:59

how fast you should be sleeping with someone that you

23:01

have genuine interest in? Yeah,

23:05

I know her rule, don't

23:07

do it before you're monogamous. I

23:10

don't necessarily agree with that. I think it's

23:12

up to you.

23:16

For me, it was whenever I felt comfortable

23:18

because I think that the right man

23:21

is going to never ghost

23:23

you, no matter if you sleep with him on

23:26

the second day. I just think first date, probably

23:28

not the best call. You know

23:30

what you're getting into there. Maybe you don't do

23:32

that. But anything onwards,

23:35

I mean, my fiance said to me the other day, because we were

23:37

talking about this,

23:37

and he

23:40

said,

23:40

even if you slept with me on the second date,

23:43

Laura, we'd still be here.

23:45

I was like, really? He's like, yeah,

23:48

that was so into you. It's

23:51

nice that you waited, but I swear,

23:52

it wouldn't

23:55

have mattered to me. And I think that's really true. I've

23:57

waited four months before.

24:00

and gotten ghosted. So

24:02

what does it matter? Like it's like, it's

24:04

about the guy. Is he a piece of shit or

24:06

is he a great person who's really into you? Like

24:09

I just think you have to go by feeling

24:11

and you cannot be yourself up about waiting

24:13

and stuff because trust me, men don't.

24:16

Men are not sitting in bed at night being like, oh my

24:18

God, I shouldn't have slept with her on

24:20

the second day. They're like, no one, you know, so

24:22

this is just a double standard for women. That

24:24

is just not cool. But you should do it when you feel

24:27

it's right. Totally. I love that.

24:29

that that's really because I always do people

24:31

that

24:31

asked me and I'm like, I don't honestly know the right

24:34

answer because I've slept with guys

24:36

for like the first date and then it's

24:38

which is not again, I would

24:40

go back and wait a little bit longer. A lot of times, it's

24:43

sort of like a weird circumstance where for some

24:45

reason, like our date gets pushed off for

24:47

like a month and we like talk all the time. And

24:50

you know, we I feel like I really get to know them. Yeah.

24:53

But I've also like had the

24:55

guys where we don't even

24:57

ever end end up sleeping together and they're like awful

25:00

and they ghost you. And you

25:02

know, so it's like you said, it's about the guy and

25:04

not about

25:05

just you know, when you

25:08

do it. And I think that that's really important.

25:10

Yeah, you're not going to turn a bad

25:12

guy into a good guy because you waited to sleep

25:14

with him. Like, that's the thing. Like,

25:16

I hate those rules. They're like, Oh, yeah,

25:18

if you want a man to marry you, you have to wait

25:20

this amount of time.

25:22

Like, really is a man thinking that like you

25:25

both doing the same thing, you're both having

25:27

So why are we getting the blame? Exactly.

25:30

Totally. And so like we have like

25:32

our show has like listeners like all

25:35

over the country, all age ranges

25:37

like I get messages from women in their 40s all

25:39

the time, women in their 30s is

25:41

sync like looking for any specific

25:43

type of,

25:44

you know, women for their database right now. We're

25:46

always looking for women, you know, our client needs

25:48

are always changing. We have like six or seven

25:51

matchmakers on the team. All

25:53

over the US. We have a Dubai matchmaker.

25:55

of matchmakers in Canada and yeah

25:57

we're always looking for 20, 30...

26:00

40s, 50s, 60s. We

26:02

want that. All types of women.

26:04

We have women clients too. It's

26:07

not my specialty.

26:09

I prefer to coach women rather than

26:11

make them a matchmaking client and I have reasons for

26:13

that. But yeah, we're always

26:16

looking. Yeah, okay, that's amazing. So

26:18

definitely guys, if you're listening, why not? Just

26:20

put your name

26:22

in. It's really not super

26:24

time consuming and you never know what

26:27

can happen. But do me a huge favor

26:29

and fill out your profile

26:32

detail. That's the thing. So all

26:34

you got to do, you click the link in my bio

26:36

on Laura the matchmaker on Instagram. The free database

26:39

link is there. It will connect to me. I

26:41

will see it. You email

26:43

me or somebody signed up in Laura's

26:45

database and sink. Okay.

26:47

A lot of women are only uploading one photo.

26:50

They're not filling out their profile. I'm like, I

26:53

have to move on. I can't do anything with this. So put

26:55

five pictures at least, please,

26:57

clear photos, and fully fill out

26:59

your profile. You have a way better chance of me

27:01

calling you and interviewing you. There's only so many hours

27:04

in the day, so yes, I want to say that.

27:06

Yeah,

27:07

amazing. And I'm sure you'll get a lot of

27:09

really great responses. I have some really

27:11

wonderful listeners. Awesome. I

27:13

also just have one little final question for you.

27:17

Yeah. Do you think that women should offer to pay

27:19

on a date? Absolutely never.

27:23

Not. No. Okay, good. No,

27:26

no, no, no. I've

27:28

paid on some dates before

27:31

because the guy asked me to split the bill,

27:34

which I find, so I'm just like,

27:36

first of all, I'd start laughing. I'd be like,

27:38

well, this is when I got smart. After

27:41

my broke guy face, I was like, okay, this is enough.

27:44

When I got smart. So I'd laugh, I'm like, oh

27:46

wow.

27:47

I mean, I didn't realize you're

27:50

going through a hard time. I mean, you picked this restaurant

27:52

and invited me here, but you want me to split the bill?" And

27:55

he like, looked at me like, and like, yeah, I'm like, you

27:58

know what? I got it. nice

28:00

whole thing. It's on me. It's like really? I'm

28:02

like yeah.

28:02

And then I would like leave block his number and he'd

28:05

message me after on some other platform. Oh my god.

28:07

I really want to see you again.

28:09

I'm like no.

28:11

Like here's the thing. When you're looking

28:13

for the one a provider it's such

28:15

a low standard to buy you a plate of food.

28:17

Like it's a plate of food and some

28:19

drinks and if like they're picking the restaurant, they're

28:22

picking where to go, it is just

28:24

unacceptable. Like so you think this guy's

28:26

going to be your future husband but he can't even buy

28:28

you a plate of food? Yeah, that's really

28:31

true. My role, because I have a lot of, I

28:33

used to definitely be very

28:35

adamant about splitting, and then I had

28:37

a friend who was like, we're not doing this

28:39

anymore. No.

28:41

You're not. And so when I started

28:43

to do it, also depended on the age, because

28:45

I've dated guys who are in the process

28:47

of starting their own companies, and

28:49

they're really putting everything

28:51

into that. And so your

28:53

lifestyle changes a little bit. So what I do is

28:56

I still let them cover like

28:58

meals and stuff, but if I'm like stopping by, like I'll

29:00

pick up coffee or like something

29:02

quick. And I feel like that was a good rule that sort

29:05

of actually helped me because I think a lot of

29:07

girls get weird now when

29:09

like guys offer to pay for things

29:11

like it's either they're automatically

29:13

super comfortable. I think it has to do with like how their parents

29:15

raised them a bit. Like for me, I was

29:17

always like a little bit

29:18

nervous when guys would just start paying for

29:20

everything like all the time. So like

29:23

when I just did like a little coffee here and there, it made

29:25

me feel like a lot more comfortable. And it was

29:27

like a good way until easing and then, I

29:29

mean I have friends who are on their boyfriend's credit

29:31

cards and like- Oh my god, lucky.

29:34

No, I think there's a balance.

29:37

I think in the courting stage the guy should

29:39

pay for the dates, but it's like, yeah, in my

29:42

relationship now, I'll buy a

29:44

dinner. I think splitting is the tacky part. It's

29:46

the splitting part that's tacky. It's like, what

29:48

are we, roommates? Oh, you want to split the

29:50

hydro bill? You want to split the dinner? No, it's

29:52

like either I grab dinner or he grabs

29:54

dinner. or I buy

29:56

him a gift because it's like I

29:59

buy groceries.

30:00

I buy this. Like, yeah, it's like it's

30:02

a partnership. But I just, you know,

30:04

I think splitting down the middle is the tacky part

30:06

for me. Not you know, you should contribute

30:08

to your relationship. It's nice. It

30:10

shows you care for your partner and you're not just, you

30:13

know, leeching off him. But you

30:15

know, yeah, it's a balance. Oh my

30:17

gosh, it's so I yeah, I just like when this and

30:20

I was also like explaining actually to a guy last night, I

30:22

was like, it's not that I need someone to

30:24

bankroll my life. I'm like, I've proven by this point

30:26

that I'm more than capable of taking care of myself.

30:29

It's not that

30:30

at all. But it's just uncomfortable

30:32

for a nice restaurant and we're on a date and

30:34

you invite me to this

30:38

restaurant that you pick

30:40

and then you're like, oh, we're going to split the bit. It's

30:42

just awkward. It's just weird.

30:45

And it's not about a money thing. It's

30:47

more so the principle for sure, which is exactly

30:49

what you're saying. It's just not classy. Again,

30:51

they picked the venue.

30:54

If you pick an expensive

30:56

place and you can't pay for her dinner, don't

30:58

take her there. There's other places

31:00

that are probably like mid-level restaurants

31:03

that you could afford. Like it's such an asshole

31:05

move to like pick a venue that's

31:07

out of your range. Like there's plenty of restaurants

31:10

where you can get a really nice dinner for two of

31:12

you for like a hundred bucks, a hundred and

31:14

twenty bucks. Like you don't need to go

31:16

to the three, four hundred dollar restaurant and make

31:18

her split with you. That's obnoxious.

31:21

Yeah,

31:21

absolutely. But thank

31:23

you again so much for coming

31:26

on. It's been so lovely having

31:28

you. Do you want to repeat one more time where everyone

31:30

is able to find you and your

31:32

services? Yeah, Laura the matchmaker

31:35

on Instagram.

31:36

Amazing. And guys, if you're going to fill

31:38

it out, make sure you do the details with lots

31:40

of photos. It's

31:42

been such a treat having you Laura. Thank you so much

31:45

for all of your wisdom. Of course. Thank

31:47

you. I hope I didn't go on too long. I like to ramble.

31:50

No, no, it was amazing. Thank you so much.

31:52

We loved having you. I'm definitely

31:54

going to be taking a lot of your advice. awesome

31:57

good

31:57

to talk to you

32:00

Ooh, never

32:02

let you go

32:28

is Sydney

32:30

in the Sheets, and I'm your host, Sydney

32:32

Page. Don't forget to follow me and

32:35

this podcast on social media at

32:37

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32:39

And if you'd like to follow me personally, check out

32:42

at Sydney underscore page on Instagram. New

32:44

episodes drop every Thursday, and please

32:46

keep sending me your thoughts and questions. I

32:49

always want to hear from you and I love hearing from

32:51

you. Fiona Smith is our senior producer,

32:53

Danny Bringer and and Sam Ada are our engineers,

32:56

Tina Rubio and Marshall Louis are

32:58

the executive producers for wondering.