0:00

The new Boost Mobile network is offering unlimited talk, text, and data

0:02

for just $25 a month for life. That sounds like a threat.

0:04

Then, how do you think we should say it? Unlimited talk, text,

0:06

and data for just $25 a month for the rest of your

0:08

life? I don't know. Until your ultimate demise, talk, text, and data

0:10

for just $25 a month for the rest of your life? I

0:12

don't know. Until your ultimate mobile mobile, for just $25 a month,

0:14

for just $25 a month, for just, for just 25, for just, for

0:16

just 25 dollars a long as long as long as they remain active, for

0:18

just 25 dollars a long as they remain active, for just, for just,

0:21

for just, for just, for just 25, for just, for just,

0:23

for just, for just, for just, for just, for just, for

0:25

just, for just, for just, for just, for just, for just,

0:27

for just, for just, for just, for just, for just, for

0:29

just, for boost unlimited plan. Dear Dear

0:31

old work platform. It's not you.

0:33

It's us. Actually, it is you.

0:36

Endless onboarding? Constant IT bottlenecks? We've

0:38

had enough. We need a platform

0:40

that just gets us. And to

0:43

be honest, we've met someone new.

0:45

They're called monday.com. and it was

0:47

love at first onboarding. They're beautiful

0:50

dashboards, they're customizable workflows, got us

0:52

floating on a digital cloud nine,

0:54

so no hard feelings, but we're

0:57

moving on. monday.com, the first work

0:59

platform you'll love to use. feelings,

1:01

but we're moving on.

1:04

monday.com. The first work

1:06

platform you'll love to use. We're

1:08

in Clapham. Yeah. And we are

1:10

very excited about this guest. So

1:13

excited. Now we're doing this on

1:15

a Friday night, which is Lenny's

1:17

favorite time to podcast. Have a

1:19

little drink. Have a little drink.

1:21

I'm really excited about this guest,

1:24

but I am slightly nervous. We're

1:26

about to be faced with one

1:28

of the best interview ever. He's

1:30

brilliant, and I feel like we're

1:32

really going to have to learn

1:35

how to master the interview. in

1:37

front of Louis through tonight. Well, he's

1:39

a master of the interview. Yes, he

1:41

is. Yeah. And you know what he

1:43

does, Mom? What, darling? He lets the

1:46

person speak. That will be novel for

1:48

us. Speak for yourself, Lady. Okay, I'll

1:50

try my best. So he enjoys the

1:52

silence. So we're going to try and

1:55

out silence him. It's basically the silence

1:57

which we need. You and me looking

1:59

at. him not speaking we'll see who

2:02

gives him first it's like don't

2:04

blink yeah yeah yeah I give

2:06

us three seconds but you don't

2:08

like silences darling you make me

2:10

nervous I do make me nervous

2:12

I don't mind silences hmm no

2:14

I think you'll find okay let's

2:16

find out let's talk to Louis

2:18

about it last Louis about sili

2:20

about sili about sili about sili

2:22

about silences Louis has done documentaries,

2:24

movies. He's now a viral tick-tock

2:26

star with My Money Don't Jiggle-Jiggle.

2:28

And he is now a podcaster,

2:30

which he started a podcast in

2:32

lockdown and now he is over

2:34

at Spotify with the Louis Thoree

2:36

podcast. And we're very excited to

2:38

have him. He gets people to

2:40

speak and say stuff and make

2:42

fools of themselves and they don't

2:44

even know they're doing it. I

2:46

don't know if that's his full

2:48

main intention, but I am intrigued

2:50

by his... Well, he's got that

2:52

angenue, hasn't he? He kind of

2:54

looks at you like, oh, you're

2:56

voting for Donald Trump. Yeah, why

2:58

would that be? And he, they

3:00

kind of explained themselves. So you

3:03

write Less is More, I think,

3:05

with him? More is More. The

3:07

guy that was reading the Boris

3:09

Johnson memoir on holiday. And what

3:11

did you say to him, Mom?

3:13

I said, oh, you must have

3:15

been the only person who bought

3:17

that book. And what did you

3:19

say? It was in clear. I

3:21

said, was it in clearance? So

3:23

Lenny and Louis have very different

3:25

interviewing methods. And we'll see him

3:27

interviewing him. I was telling him.

3:29

It was an idiot. Lambasting him.

3:31

Lambasting him. Lambasting him. So yeah,

3:33

Louis Threw is coming up and

3:35

mum's cooked. However, as we went

3:37

to this charity lunch today, we

3:39

have brought in some help. No,

3:41

we don't do this. I don't

3:43

think we've done this ever or

3:45

well actually I tell a lie

3:47

we have done this once before

3:49

and but we are thanking lovely

3:51

Johnny. Johnny my phone who is

3:53

a vegetarian yeah because apparently Louisa

3:55

who likes eating vegetarian food so

3:57

what are we starting with mom?

3:59

Chicken Super Matsibles, but he does

4:01

eat meat. That's what I was

4:03

told. He just prefers eating vegetables.

4:06

He tries to eat more vegetables.

4:08

Okay. But I think chicken soup

4:10

is so clear. It's hardly eating

4:12

meat, isn't it? No, of course.

4:14

Yeah. It's kind of. So we're

4:16

starting with chicken super mats, hala

4:18

bread. Yeah. And then we've got

4:20

this Friday night. Do you want

4:22

to do the candles? Sure, why

4:24

not? So that we've got a

4:26

vegetable tartar, which is delicious. And

4:28

then I've done little gem lettuce

4:30

with buttermilk and anchovy dressing and

4:32

a bit of garlic. A bit.

4:34

Yeah, a little bit. It's like

4:36

living, like it's infiltrating. I'll tell

4:38

him. Yeah, okay. And then I've

4:40

also done a redicio with onion

4:42

pebbles. It's such a funny. Word,

4:44

isn't it? It's lovely. It's like,

4:46

don't be ridiculous. Don't be ridiculous.

4:48

So it's redicio with onion petals,

4:50

walnuts, and blue cheese. As inspired

4:52

by sapphies. Yeah, Los Angeles. Yeah,

4:54

sounds delicious. Yeah. And what's for

4:56

put? A carderman and fig Pavlova.

4:58

And there is rosewater and cardamen

5:00

in the actual mering. And also

5:02

I've cooked the figs with some

5:04

cardamen as well. Nice. Lenny, eight

5:06

game, tried my best. Welcome Louis

5:09

Thoreau. You've just had a puncture.

5:11

You were cycling. Nearly punch up.

5:13

That would have been more exciting.

5:15

You just had a punch up.

5:17

You crossed paths with some layer

5:19

of youth. Do you get road

5:21

rage? What kind of cyclists are

5:23

you? Oh. Do you bang on

5:25

the roofs of cars? I'm not.

5:27

I'd like to think. Dingle your

5:29

bell. I'm not, I'm not, I'm

5:31

a bit of an amber gambler.

5:33

Oh, God. I love that! You

5:35

never heard that? No! That does

5:37

make it a slightly slightly, I

5:39

guess, more rosy and sexy, doesn't

5:41

it? You know, you figure, you

5:43

figure, you figure, you, you figure

5:45

because you're not burning fossil fuels

5:47

and you're there peddling away and

5:49

it's quite tiring and that if,

5:51

if, if it's a, if it's

5:53

a, you know, what's the word,

5:55

like a fine margin, then you

5:57

think, well, I'll nip over even

5:59

though it's turning or... I'll do

6:01

the crossing, even though it's gone

6:03

orange or maybe even just gone

6:05

red, which is not ideal. But

6:07

I don't think I'm aggressive. You

6:09

know, there's a lot of tribalism

6:12

on the road between the cyclists

6:14

and the drivers. How do you

6:16

feel about line bikers? Well, I've,

6:18

look, they don't pay my bills,

6:20

but nevertheless, I have, I got

6:22

here on a line bike because

6:24

I got, because of the puncture.

6:26

Now look, are you veggie? No.

6:28

Right. I do eat vegetables. You

6:30

like vegetables. You like vegetables. Flexitarian.

6:32

Okay. So I have made chicken

6:34

soup with matzables. Because it's my

6:36

favorite thing to make. Oh, that's

6:38

a nice wine too. Yeah, it's

6:40

lovely, isn't it? It's wine, society.

6:42

There's such good value, to be

6:44

honest. Yeah. It's lovely, isn't it?

6:46

It's wine society. There's such a

6:48

good value. So then she like

6:50

got a bit of anything. Okay,

6:52

good. Right. But he would like

6:54

to eat soup. What's your favorite

6:56

thing to eat? Well, vegetable lasagna.

6:58

Favorite. I love a really good

7:00

pizza actually. Yeah, I don't cook

7:02

pizza because you can't really replicate

7:04

proper pizza quality at home. Should

7:06

I tell you my trick? Go

7:08

to your favorite pizza place. Pay

7:10

for the dough. Yeah. And then

7:12

make pizzas at home. Get a

7:15

gosney. Oh, one of those home

7:17

pizza ovens. Yeah, they're brilliant. But

7:19

if you get the dough, because

7:21

I can't be fat with dough.

7:23

Yeah. you do it. How old

7:25

are your kids? Here's the thing

7:27

though. There's 1816 and 10. So

7:29

they don't really want to make

7:31

pizza with their dad anymore. Okay

7:33

fair enough. And then you're doing

7:35

the one by one and it's

7:37

a bit of a, it's a

7:39

little bit annoying. If you could

7:41

bring out four at the same

7:43

time, if you could bring out

7:45

four at the same time of

7:47

a decent size, but then you

7:49

become a little bit annoying. If

7:51

you could bring out four at

7:53

the same time of a decent,

7:55

you're making. This is like, you're

7:57

making it's a little bit a

7:59

little bit a little bit a

8:01

little bit a little bit of

8:03

a little bit of a little

8:05

bit of, a little bit of,

8:07

a little bit, a little bit

8:09

of, like, like, like, like, like,

8:11

a little bit, like, like, like,

8:13

like, a, a, a, a, a,

8:15

a, a, a, a, a, a,

8:18

a, a, a, a, a, a,

8:20

a, a, a, Very hard. Because

8:22

it's first to cook in like

8:24

five minutes. Yeah, it's going to

8:26

be really hot and you want

8:28

tiger spotting. You know that? Leopard

8:30

spotting. That's right. Leopard spotting on

8:32

the crust where it's where it's

8:34

got little burn marks. But then

8:36

you're like, oh my God, it's

8:38

like working in the engine of

8:40

an old steam train where you're

8:42

having loading in more fuel to

8:44

keep the heat up. Then you're

8:46

stretching out your dough, you're putting

8:48

your toppings on, and then suddenly

8:50

two hours have gone by and

8:52

you haven't talked to anyone. So

8:54

where do you get your pizza

8:56

from then? Well, I would, well,

8:58

the best is in America, obviously,

9:00

and in fact, New York, yeah.

9:02

What's your toppings? I'd go like

9:04

a veggie supreme. With pizzas I'm

9:06

more inclined to. Supreme. That's what

9:08

they just, that's what they call.

9:10

Okay. That's like a dominoes topic.

9:12

I don't mind dominoes. Okay. But,

9:14

but, but. With pineapple, without. I

9:16

wouldn't go pineos. What's your dip

9:18

of dominoes? The Herbie. I love

9:21

it. You know what, when I

9:23

was living on my own, I

9:25

was, I was between girlfriends, in

9:27

my early girlfriends in my early

9:29

20s. Maybe late 20s. I was

9:31

ordering dominoes quite a lot because

9:33

I like to cook but not

9:35

when I'm not just on my

9:37

own. It feels to take it

9:39

takes the saver out of it.

9:41

So I was ordering and I

9:43

was getting dominoes pizza coming around

9:45

and then you get the dips

9:47

and then you dip it in

9:49

the dip and a few weeks

9:51

went by and I got this

9:53

weird sensation like I was carrying

9:55

like a rubber ring around and

9:57

I realized like I'd put on

9:59

a ton of weight which was

10:01

weird and then it turns out.

10:03

Can't be quite, yeah, can't be

10:05

quite calorific. If you do the

10:07

dip, I think the dip pushed

10:09

me over the edge. You don't

10:11

think it was the full pizza

10:13

from Domino's. Probably that didn't help

10:15

either. Let's start at the beginning.

10:17

You were born in Singapore. Yes,

10:19

I was. Why were you born

10:21

in Singapore? Because they were, my

10:24

parents were teachers and they'd met

10:26

in Kenya. I think they'd met

10:28

in Uganda in Central Africa and,

10:30

or is that East Africa. Anyway,

10:32

the point being, They were teachers

10:34

and they'd moved from Uganda to

10:36

Singapore to teach. My dad was

10:38

teaching at the University of Singapore.

10:40

They weren't missionaries. No, my mom

10:42

was in the VSO, volunteer service

10:44

overseas. My dad was in the

10:46

Peace Corps. That was his service

10:48

instead of going into the Vietnam

10:50

War. They were both idealistic and

10:52

like the idea of travelling and

10:54

seeing the world and broadening their

10:56

horizons. And they met and fell

10:58

in love. Had my brother in...

11:00

Campala in Uganda and then I

11:02

think my dad was getting into

11:04

trouble in Africa with the authorities

11:06

so they moved to Singapore and

11:08

that's where I that's where I

11:10

entered the picture. How many years

11:12

were you there? One year I

11:14

think? So you don't really remember

11:16

it? I mean don't remember even

11:18

vaguely and I've never been back

11:20

but I like the idea of

11:22

it like it seems like you

11:24

know it's a city state so

11:27

it's it's like it's just one

11:29

yeah it's like Monaco or Vatican

11:31

city so really You know, it's

11:33

like Singapore, the capital of Singapore,

11:35

which is Singapore, you know what

11:37

I mean? Yeah. And I think

11:39

it's a bit of a melting

11:41

pot. You've got Chinese and Malaysian

11:43

and a sort of Southeast Asian

11:45

mix and kind of great social

11:47

welfareably, very clean. That's what I

11:49

understand of it. And then you

11:51

came to Catford, am I off?

11:53

Yeah, to South Florida. Well, we

11:55

moved to the UK. My mom...

11:57

Well, they settled in Dorset. I

11:59

guess my mom's parents were in

12:01

near Bemenster. Oh, that's near where

12:03

my indoors live in Bridport. Yeah.

12:05

Yeah, we used to go into

12:07

Bridport to do the shopping. Uh,

12:09

and they were in a little

12:11

town near Netherbury. That's where my

12:13

grandparents had retired. Anyway, and then

12:15

they moved up to Cap, they

12:17

wanted, my mom wanted to work

12:19

at the BBC, she went to

12:21

work for BBC World Service, so

12:23

they moved to Catford in South

12:25

East London. Glamorous Catford. Just a

12:27

little similar. Do you. Yeah, and

12:30

Catford's on the up, thank you.

12:32

It's only taken 50 years. Yeah.

12:34

So how long were you in

12:36

South London were you in South

12:38

London for. 16, 17 years because

12:40

we were in Catford and then

12:42

we moved to Wandsworth and not

12:44

far from where we are now.

12:46

Clapham Junction, neck of the woods,

12:48

north side Wandsworth Common. El Cinch

12:50

Road if you want to get

12:52

specific. Yeah, it's quite a nice

12:54

road. Lovely. Actually nice houses. Yeah,

12:56

they're all different. It was supposedly

12:58

designed as part of the great

13:00

exhibition in the mid 19th century

13:02

to illustrate different housing styles. So

13:04

that was really my childhood home

13:06

from the age of five till

13:08

when I went off to university.

13:10

And well, firstly, round the dinner

13:12

table, who was round the dinner

13:14

table and who was cooking? It

13:16

was me, my mom, my dad

13:18

and my brother, and I was

13:20

at boarding school during the week

13:22

from the age of 13, and

13:24

my mom was a working mom.

13:26

So when I was probably from

13:28

the age of five to 13,

13:30

I was getting, I was eating

13:33

a lot of my meals with

13:35

either a nanny or an ope

13:37

here who was just making fairly,

13:39

you know, just kids' food. I

13:41

remember things like spaghetti hoops on

13:43

toast. Yeah. Do you know what

13:45

I'm talking about? You don't do

13:47

that anymore, do you? My kids

13:49

aren't into it. They'll do beans

13:51

on toast, but they can't do

13:53

the hoops. Hoops on toast. I

13:55

haven't even eaten it. But I

13:57

used to love that because it's

13:59

very sweet tomato sauce and starch

14:01

on starch. Yes, very soft. That

14:03

was an, I used to own

14:05

one, you know, white toast with

14:07

angel delight, you know, for afters.

14:09

Which flavour? Butter Scotch. Everyone loves

14:11

Butter Scotch. Yeah. That would have

14:13

been a quite a treat to

14:15

have the angel delight. Or a

14:17

club biscuit. Oh, so chocolateine. A

14:19

lot of fish fingers, maybe a

14:21

lamb chop, sausages. Do you remember

14:23

Frank's and beans? Yeah, you bought them

14:25

in a tin. Oh, right, yeah. With weird

14:28

little, sort of soft little hot dogs

14:30

inside the beans. So it's awful. I

14:32

mean, that's what we were eating. I

14:34

don't know, now it certainly seems almost

14:37

quite weird and unhealthy. It's just

14:39

when I was like six, seven,

14:41

eight, nine, you know, that was

14:43

what I was eating. And then

14:45

boarding school, how was the food there?

14:47

It was okay. Was that Westminster? Yeah,

14:50

I went to Westminster. You know, he

14:52

went too far away. My big thing,

14:54

okay, that I want to get out

14:56

of the way is that until I

14:58

was probably 16, 17, 18, I was

15:00

a fussy eater, I was almost, you

15:02

know, that term neophobic where you're afraid

15:04

of new things? Oh my God. Which

15:07

I think is not uncommon in children.

15:09

No, most children don't know. You know,

15:11

there were five things that I

15:13

knew I liked, tomato soup, you

15:15

know, you know, you know, chips, fish and chips,

15:18

and chips, and then I really didn't want to

15:20

go out of that lane. And my parents, like,

15:22

one of our family things was on a Sunday,

15:24

my parents would take us to an Indian restaurant

15:26

in Putney called the Taj Mahal. And my brother

15:28

would get like a prawn berryani, and my dad

15:31

would get a king-prawn Madras. I don't know what

15:33

I can't remember what my mom would get,

15:35

and what would I get? And what would

15:37

I get? What pupadam's. Fried chicken fried chicken

15:39

and chips. Fried chicken and chips. Fried chicken

15:41

and chips. Fried chicken and chips. Did they

15:43

do that? Yeah, they had like a little

15:45

English section on the menu and I was

15:48

like, I want the fried tree. I didn't

15:50

even trust rice. Did you? I didn't trust

15:52

it. I was like, what is it? And

15:54

one day I was like, why don't you

15:56

just try? I'm like, imagine it's just try

15:58

and you have a spoonful of rice. And

16:00

what do you, but it's bland, isn't it?

16:02

Because actually no one just eats rice. You

16:04

don't want rice on its own. You want

16:07

rice with something. So I was like, no,

16:09

I don't like it because it just tasted

16:11

rice, right? But until I was probably 16

16:13

or 17, I didn't really acquire a taste

16:16

for anything, particularly what I would have considered

16:18

exotic. How did it make your, were your

16:20

parents, kind of accepting of that or were

16:22

they irritated? I give them enormous credit for

16:24

being patient with me and I think there

16:27

was a phase when I was 15, 16,

16:29

17, when I was mainly eating crunchy nut

16:31

cornflakes. Do you know what I'm talking about?

16:33

I was eating probably three or four bowls

16:36

a day almost like someone with disordered eating.

16:38

You know what I mean? Where they'd like,

16:40

they'd put out the food and here's your,

16:42

there were a few things like my mom

16:45

made fish parcels and I liked those, that

16:47

was a deelius. Oh she, a deelium made

16:49

fish. She liked deelia, but no this was

16:51

actually, do you know, um, oh my god,

16:54

Jocelyn Dimbleby. Yes. It was called a taste,

16:56

no, it wasn't a taste of dreams, that

16:58

was her pudding, but she had another one

17:00

that was, it was a jostlinin Dimblein Dimbleby,

17:03

it was, it was a jostle and Dimbleby,

17:05

it was a jimbleby, it was, it was

17:07

a jimbleby, it was, it was a jimbleby,

17:09

it was, it was, it was a jimbleby,

17:12

it was, it was, it was, it was,

17:14

it was, it was, it was, it was,

17:16

it was, it was, it was, it was

17:18

a j It was basically little parcels of

17:21

fish with pastry, a bit of cheese and

17:23

some spinach. I liked that. And there were

17:25

a few others that, as time went on,

17:27

I brought in, but there was a time

17:30

when I was like... don't like it mom

17:32

she's like okay well just go and you

17:34

know have something else like I stick it

17:36

in the bin and have crunching up cornflakes

17:39

how did that work in boarding school though

17:41

was it actually quite straightforward because usually it

17:43

was probably like you have fish and chips

17:45

on this Friday like it would be really

17:48

bland and basic so it kind of suited

17:50

you I could I could manage there'd be

17:52

something that I could eat did you like

17:54

boarding I did quiet yeah I mean it

17:57

was an odd one because actually I lived

17:59

Not, you know, 20 minutes. Sorry, that was

18:01

my... Sorry, it was just a bracelet, I

18:03

was fiddling, so... God, it sounded like. I

18:06

nearly just... I thought it was a... You've

18:08

been short. I know I... I thought that

18:10

was like a terror attack. I was ready

18:12

to drop and roll. I thought there's a

18:15

gun was a shot. I need a minute

18:17

to calm down now. What was it? It

18:19

was my pill brace. My heart's going like

18:21

a drum. How did it make so much

18:24

noise? I don't know. I'm sorry and you

18:26

were about to talk about. I've totally lost

18:28

my focus. Don't worry, boarding school, did you

18:30

enjoy it? I've been in war zones. Shit

18:33

like that can set me off. Did they

18:35

have crunchy nut at night? Do you provide

18:37

therapy if I'm traumatised by being here? That's

18:39

really my proper job. No. Is there any

18:42

food that's triggering for you? Christ chicken soup

18:44

probably. Not really but

18:46

there was food that I could imagine

18:48

would be triggering like in Japan don't

18:50

they do a food where they they

18:53

they fill it the fish while it's

18:55

still alive and then it's flopping around

18:57

on your plate while you eat it.

19:00

That would be quite triggering. I don't

19:02

like eating that Jesse. I don't like

19:04

eating things other than I'll eat an

19:07

oyster while it's alive but I wouldn't

19:09

want to eat anything else while it

19:11

was actually alive looking at you saying

19:13

what are you doing? boarding school and

19:16

truthfully it's a bit like it's a

19:18

funny one because parts of it are

19:20

brilliant it's a bit like being in

19:23

a war zone I got I mean

19:25

I used to facetiously compare it that

19:27

when I went to San Quentin it

19:30

was fine because I'd already been to

19:32

boarding school and it was exactly the

19:34

same you know it's an all-male environment

19:36

with a lot of situational homosexuality you

19:39

know guys slapping each other's bums and

19:41

saying like oh get you you you

19:43

you know and and sublimated sort of

19:46

like wrestling and squeezing and also it's

19:48

not gangs but it's cliques and parts

19:50

of it are kind of cozy and

19:53

almost magical right that almost that Hogwarts

19:55

feeling of being in an alternate reality

19:57

in these extraordinary centuries-old buildings, Christopher Red

20:00

Design buildings, your assemblies were literally in

20:02

Westminster Abbey, if you can get your

20:04

head round there. You would go off

20:06

to your Monday morning assembly, go past

20:09

Chaucer's tomb, go past a monument to

20:11

William Shakespeare, you know, you're right in

20:13

the heart of the oldest place, you

20:16

know, this is where literally Edward the

20:18

Confessor... I think Corret was crowned right

20:20

king in whatever that was 1065 or

20:23

something and so all of that that

20:25

all the stones are saturated in all

20:27

that history but at the same time

20:29

you sort of you feel occasionally a

20:32

bit lonely but dislocated and you know

20:34

you miss out in parts of family

20:36

life. I remember looking around Westminster with

20:39

my son yeah yeah it felt like

20:41

university it felt clever it felt the

20:43

most cleverest place I'd ever been into

20:46

and actually when you go off to

20:48

because I went off to Oxford not

20:50

trying to make a big thing out

20:52

of it I got a first in

20:55

history very good thank you it's not

20:57

a big deal is a very high

20:59

first is I'm not trying to say

21:02

a lot about that in history. That

21:04

is very clever. That is very clever.

21:06

That's irrelevant, that's not important. What's important

21:09

is that, other than that, is that

21:11

having been to Westminster, you sort of

21:13

felt a bit like, I was maudlin

21:15

College, Oxford, very desirable, very high-achime. Did

21:18

you date in that time, Louis? The

21:20

point I was going to get to...

21:22

Is that way you got the first?

21:25

Okay. The first is an important, I

21:27

don't know why I brought that up.

21:29

It's very impressive. and it paid off

21:32

and so that it is what it

21:34

is enough I wish I hadn't mentioned

21:36

it and actually I wish I wish

21:38

I hadn't mentioned no so having been

21:41

to Westminster it was a bit like

21:43

you'd already it was a tiny bit

21:45

like oh I've cloisters, old buildings people

21:48

going around in gowns been there done

21:50

that oh did you wear a gown

21:52

at school or the master's did and

21:55

the master's did and so it was

21:57

kind of a thing and it's it's

21:59

not like he didn't you can read

22:01

more about my experiences in my memoir

22:04

got to get through this available on

22:06

Amazon five star I reviewed it gave

22:08

it five stars they took the review

22:11

down oh for gosh did you write

22:13

it a conflict of interest oh didn't

22:15

you just pretend to be Justin through

22:18

he can't read they would have seen

22:20

through that his very handsome there is

22:22

handsome is that where you met Adam

22:25

Yeah. At Westminster. Yeah. That's also in

22:27

God, to go through this. We've had

22:29

to. I'm sorry I didn't read your

22:31

memoir. Did you not read it? No,

22:34

no. Sorry. That's one thing when I'm

22:36

interviewing a guest. I know. We know

22:38

that. You're really good. Listen, this is

22:41

something that I... Because the thing... If

22:43

you want to hide something, if you

22:45

absolutely don't want people to know about

22:48

you, put it in a book, no

22:50

one will read it. Oh really? Yeah,

22:52

Jimmy Saville had confessed everything in his

22:54

book, but no one read it. No

22:57

one read the book. I'm amazed what

22:59

you can, I read Sharon Osbourne's book

23:01

and I was like, okay. They were,

23:04

like, it was extraordinary. And then, and

23:06

then I asked her about it. She's

23:08

like, how do you know all this

23:11

stuff? She hadn't read her own book.

23:13

She probably hadn't written it either. That

23:15

was hard because we wanted people who

23:17

would be of the caliber that we

23:20

thought would merit that level of treatment,

23:22

but you're also asking a lot of

23:24

the stars. It's not like a podcast

23:27

where you're saying sit down for an

23:29

hour or two, we'll come to you,

23:31

you come to us, or we can

23:34

even do it remotely. You're actually saying

23:36

we need two or three days, probably

23:38

in your home, at your work, and

23:40

that's a big ask of someone at

23:43

that level. Back in the day, just

23:45

to roll back. The first things I

23:47

did involving celebrities, we would say we

23:50

want 10 days. This was, um... They

23:52

never have to do that. I mentioned

23:54

Jimmy Saville, Paul Daniels was one for

23:57

those who remember, the magician and his

23:59

wife Debbie McGee. Oh yeah. Neil and

24:01

Christine Hamilton, Max Clifford, the publicist and

24:03

a few others. That was very very

24:06

hard and quite quickly we ran out

24:08

of road and actually whether it was

24:10

never kind of made explicit but in

24:13

point of fact we were largely dealing

24:15

with people who were on the downside

24:17

of their careers. It's not a nice

24:20

term. So they came on your show

24:22

instead of going on strictly? It was

24:24

before strictly. You were like the I'm

24:27

a celebrity before. It was for Big

24:29

Brother or around the same time. It

24:31

was I'm a celebrity before any of

24:33

that. And then when reality TV came

24:36

along and celebrities realised they could get

24:38

their own, you know, they could appear

24:40

on things they didn't have to tolerate

24:43

a BBC inquisitor being impertinent, then quite

24:45

clearly they would choose to do that.

24:47

Plus the shows went on and who

24:50

wants to be like... who wants to

24:52

be like... He wants to be like,

24:54

well we've done Jimmy Saville and we've

24:56

done Paul Daniels so we'd love to

24:59

do you. And I remember one or

25:01

two of the celebrity's agents were like,

25:03

well that's not a very nice thing

25:06

to be asked. You know it became

25:08

almost like a brand of like being

25:10

washed up. It's like Louis through asks

25:13

you to do something. So 15, 20

25:15

years went by and I feel like

25:17

it was a long road of trying

25:19

to kind of... How do I put

25:22

this? Show people that I wasn't just

25:24

out to get them. To get people.

25:26

To show actually that I was up

25:29

for having conversations that felt fair and

25:31

humane and that would be, you know,

25:33

you know, a win-win in a sense

25:36

or at least that that's what we

25:38

were aiming for was like not to

25:40

show people up but to absolutely just

25:42

tell the truth in a way that

25:45

might not be unnecessarily prohibitive. You left

25:47

university? Yeah, well my first actual job

25:49

job leaving university was working in a...

25:52

as an apprentice, as a sort of

25:54

helper to a glass blower. Wow. Yeah,

25:56

in Boston, in Boston, Massachusetts. Why? So

25:59

basically, I left university with the aforementioned

26:01

American parent, I had an American passport.

26:03

I went to live in America and

26:05

I thought, I don't know what I

26:08

want to do, I'm very confused, I

26:10

don't know, I have a... degree from

26:12

Oxford, I have no idea what to

26:15

do with myself. I've been on this

26:17

track, high achieving, like getting absurd, like

26:19

working ridiculously hard, learning about medieval kings

26:22

of France and the scientific movement, Galileo

26:24

Descartes, Boyle, Kepler, Newton. Right, like who,

26:26

what do you do? Then suddenly you're

26:28

like, well, now you're in the real

26:31

world, they kick you out the other

26:33

side of university, and what do you

26:35

qualified for? Like, I could have been

26:38

an academic, I guess, I didn't want

26:40

to do that. And I was like,

26:42

well, what do I do? I don't

26:45

know, I'm like a cage chicken, like

26:47

a cage veal that's been released into

26:49

the wild. You know, with spindly little

26:52

legs. I was like a battery hen,

26:54

with spindly legs, saying like, I don't

26:56

know how to fly, I don't know

26:58

what to do. So I thought, well,

27:01

I have got an American passport, my

27:03

brother was living in America at the

27:05

America at the time, at the time.

27:08

My parents had recently separated. Don't you

27:10

gonna make me cry? No No, it

27:12

was a weird time emotionally for me.

27:15

Yeah more but more of that in

27:17

Gotta get through this it's a very

27:19

moving pizza the book and so you

27:21

know it's you think like oh well

27:24

you were a grown man your parents

27:26

were getting divorced deal with it man

27:28

up stop being a snowflake for fuck's

27:31

sake no actually it's quite upsetting when

27:33

your parents divorced even if you are

27:35

a grown man I could talk more

27:38

about that. That would be an exclusive...

27:40

No, it's an odd because, also because

27:42

I could see how upset my mum

27:44

was. Were you angry at your dad?

27:47

Well, it, it, not, I mean, I

27:49

was... I think I was angry with

27:51

both of them. I think mainly what

27:54

I was angry about was that I

27:56

was becoming the vector for their relationship.

27:58

So they weren't really speaking. But my

28:01

dad would be saying one thing about

28:03

what was happening and my mom would

28:05

be saying, like, what did your dad

28:07

say? And I'm like, this, go between

28:10

in the relationship. She moved to America.

28:12

Well, that wasn't why I moved to

28:14

America, but that was what was going

28:17

on in my life. And so I

28:19

moved because I didn't know what I

28:21

was good for. And I thought, well,

28:24

I'll go live in America, at least

28:26

I'll be kind of experiencing something. I've

28:28

got an American passport. I traveled around

28:30

for a couple of months. I lived

28:33

with my dad at his house in

28:35

Cape Cod for a little bit. where

28:37

he was now living full-time having separated

28:40

from my mom and then my brother

28:42

had moved to Boston he just finished

28:44

a master's degree at Yale he was

28:47

working at something called a TV channel

28:49

I stepped on his floor for a

28:51

bit and I couldn't find you know

28:53

it's like what do I do now

28:56

I thought well I could get work

28:58

in a bookshop like that was you

29:00

know what I mean is like what

29:03

do you do when you're 21 and

29:05

you've got really no qualifications other than

29:07

a degree right you just you know

29:10

and so I thought well work in

29:12

a work in a work in a

29:14

bookshop and then Near the book shop

29:17

there was a glass-blowing shop a studio

29:19

where they were making these strange goblets.

29:21

It's a technique like Marano. Well I

29:23

don't know what that is. Well in

29:26

Iraq, yeah, they blow glass. Yeah, they

29:28

were basically, it's called the macheo technique,

29:30

which is a Venetian glass glass. Yeah,

29:33

right. So Verona is an island of

29:35

fairness, isn't it? Yeah. So it was

29:37

similar. They made these cherubs. It was

29:40

kind of a weird Frankensteinian process where

29:42

he'd buy these goblets from the shop

29:44

and then he'd cut this cherub in

29:46

the middle and then he'd fold this

29:49

cherub in the middle and then he'd

29:51

fold this glass. a willy on them.

29:53

You're joking. I'm serious. Did you ever

29:56

have to put the willy on? I

29:58

wish. I had no glass skills. So

30:00

then, basically, the working for his name

30:03

with Tony Devlin paid like 25 cents

30:05

an hour more than the bookshop. So

30:07

I was like, well, I'll go and

30:09

work with Tony and help with the

30:12

willies. Yeah. Can you eat some of

30:14

your soup? Yeah. Do you need some

30:16

bowls there? So genicious. It is nice,

30:19

isn't it? Yeah. Do you like match

30:21

balls? put in the fridge over the

30:23

night and I skim it so it

30:26

feels good for you right yeah so

30:28

it's got no fat yeah there's very

30:30

little schmaltz yeah no schmolt are you

30:32

good at cooking um I don't feel

30:35

I should be the one that's like

30:37

reviewing your book on Amazon isn't it

30:39

you could ask someone like okay okay

30:42

so if we were coming around to

30:44

yours yeah what are you making us

30:46

Louis 3 um that's a great question

30:49

well I tell you what I tell

30:51

you what I like to make I'm

30:53

a no frills frills cook if it

30:55

was lunch I might just do, I

30:58

might just roast a chicken, I know

31:00

it's so boring, but I really love

31:02

just a nice roast chicken. I might,

31:05

if I was feeling, if you'd given

31:07

me a bit more warning, and if

31:09

it was you, it would be a

31:12

bit more special because, you know, you,

31:14

we don't know each other that well,

31:16

so I'd probably want to roll out

31:19

the red carpet, and I might, um,

31:21

to a vegetarian lasagna. I've heard about

31:23

this vegetarian lasagna. kind of fun and

31:25

also it means that you've prepped it

31:28

so once the guests are there you

31:30

stick it in the oven with a

31:32

nice salad that's a lovely meal or

31:35

a slow roasted lamb there's a couple

31:37

of recipes where it's like a five

31:39

or six hour and it falls off

31:42

the boat a queer is that I

31:44

believe the French term a queer meaning

31:46

to the like to the spoon like

31:48

as in it's so tender that you

31:51

can you can you can break off

31:53

with a spoon. I always feel like

31:55

slow-cooked food feels so special and it

31:58

feels so thoughtful but actually it's quite

32:00

effortless isn't it because you're kind of

32:02

bung it in. I love a slow roast.

32:04

Me too. Do you know that viral recipe

32:07

that's like a beef stew where there's only

32:09

five ingredients and it never goes

32:11

wrong and it's extraordinarily delicious is

32:14

literally, literally, five ingredients. There's no

32:16

chopping. Oh I love that. Two

32:18

of the ingredients are just spices

32:21

that are in a packet. It

32:23

never fails and I think it's

32:25

a five-hour, six-hour beef roast. And

32:27

what would you serve it with? mashed

32:30

potato. Do you add anything

32:32

to your mash? Do you like to

32:34

get decodent? I don't, I mean,

32:36

I know people who like they'll

32:39

add like um Borsen, you know

32:41

that one? Yes, we have in

32:43

our cookbook a chicken

32:46

Borsam courtesy of producer

32:48

Alice. Yeah, that's nice. I

32:50

mean, but I actually think

32:52

if you do, if I put

32:54

quite a lot of butter in

32:57

and Obviously, season it liberally with

32:59

salt and pepper, a little bit

33:01

of milk. I don't think it

33:03

needs anything else. What else does

33:05

it need? So you are, you're quite

33:08

foodie, like you like cooking. Yeah, I love

33:10

cooking. I'm the, I would say I'm the

33:12

cook, I'm the cook of the house. Oh

33:14

right. Yeah, I do, I would say 90%

33:16

of the cooking. In fact, maybe even

33:19

100%. So your poor wife is

33:21

not eating tonight because you're here,

33:23

have you already practiced some food?

33:25

Well Friday nights we have a

33:28

takeaway. Which actually I'd rather cook

33:30

on a Friday night but it's

33:32

a tradition, it's kind of nice

33:34

in a way, the kids like it.

33:36

It's a special night to have

33:38

something ordered. Have you just got

33:40

boys? Three boys, yeah. But on

33:43

a Saturday or Sunday I cook

33:45

to relax, I cook to sort

33:47

of busy myself, I cook obviously

33:49

to eat. and so on a

33:51

Sunday of Sunday I do some

33:53

batch cooking like I'll typically make

33:55

a like a huge bolognese.

33:57

At Aldi you can get 700

34:00

50 grams of mints. I love

34:02

algae. Do you know what I'm

34:04

talking about? And it's a mixture

34:06

of pork and beef mints. And

34:08

it actually says on the label,

34:10

ideal for bolognese. Do you know

34:12

what I'm talking about? No, but

34:14

that's such a good hack. I

34:16

love algae. It's very, very affordable.

34:18

And so there's a Jamie Oliver

34:20

recipe for bolognese in ministry of

34:22

food. And it's basically two onions,

34:24

two clothes of garlic, two carrots,

34:27

two sticks of celery. of tomatoes

34:29

refilled with water and he doesn't

34:31

call for tomato paste but I

34:33

put the paste in I think

34:35

it makes a bit but and

34:37

what I what I also do

34:39

is like beforehand I'll often either

34:41

fry up some pancetta or fry

34:43

up some this is my invention.

34:45

I don't know, invention, that's a

34:47

strong word. Some choriso, which is

34:49

rich and papricity, like fry it

34:52

for like two, three, four minutes

34:54

and then take it out, put

34:56

it to one side and it

34:58

infuses the bolognese with some really

35:00

rich umami flavors. And then you

35:02

do 750 grams, that's about four

35:04

meals, and then all through the

35:06

week, you know like about three

35:08

boys. Well, they come and go,

35:10

so they'll have a bit, go

35:12

about, but basically, it's like having

35:14

a cauldron, you know, like being

35:16

a gall, you know, in ancient

35:19

times, and you've got a huge

35:21

cauldron of Follonaise, and they come,

35:23

literally, today for lunch, they came

35:25

and helped themselves. By the way,

35:27

I'm always conscious of like cutting

35:29

down on meat, I think a

35:31

really good putenesca, and again, just

35:33

double the quantity so that you

35:35

can, um... you can you have

35:37

enough you know when they say

35:39

like enough before well just do

35:41

enough for eight or twelve do

35:44

you know what I mean and

35:46

then stick it in a Tupperware

35:48

thing save that when you get

35:50

a takeaway save the Tupperware boxes

35:52

do you do that wash them

35:54

show Louis your draw I've got

35:56

I've got but I've got about

35:58

a thousand of them Are you

36:00

organized? As long as they all,

36:02

I only have one type and

36:04

if you order from, oh no,

36:06

it's not the right type, but

36:08

basically you make, do a pudaneska,

36:11

tomatoes, capers, olives, anchovies, I don't

36:13

know the proportions, and that's good

36:15

all week. The pudanesco, do you

36:17

know why they call it pudanesco?

36:19

Horsehorse, well I shouldn't say it,

36:21

but prostitute sauce, does that matter?

36:23

Sex worker sauce, because... Because they

36:25

didn't have very long between clients,

36:27

so they'd have like 15 minutes

36:29

and they'd have to whip something

36:31

up really fast. Oh that's why

36:33

it's a good thing to make.

36:36

Did they make that cheap... In

36:38

Italian, it's poutine, in French. Did

36:40

you get that on your weird

36:42

weekend with the porn stars? Just

36:44

asking. Amazing. Delicious. It's so rich

36:46

and it's so, it feels like

36:48

it's good for you. Chicken soup

36:50

for the soul. What did the,

36:52

what did the, what did the

36:54

porn stars eat on their like,

36:56

did they have like protein sheets

36:58

or did they have like strawberries

37:01

dipped in chocolate? I didn't spend

37:03

enough at home with the, porn

37:05

stars in general, this is a

37:07

huge generalisation. Yeah. But based on

37:09

my limited experience, I mean I

37:11

made three films in that world,

37:13

but... They're not massively the ones

37:15

I met I should say have

37:17

you finished well massively they weren't

37:19

like okay I feel weird even

37:21

I'm on thin ice with this

37:23

well I didn't spend enough at

37:25

home with them to really know

37:28

I will say that In the

37:30

world of the brothel I spent

37:32

three weeks living at a brothel

37:34

Not for a film I just

37:36

liked living now I always make

37:38

that joke is like a film

37:40

that's dying inside one that you

37:42

continue and um and they always

37:44

it like the it was the

37:46

best stocked fridge you know they

37:48

say an army marches on its

37:50

stomach Well, a sex worker also,

37:53

may I? Had sex on her

37:55

stomach. I didn't, I was going

37:57

to use a rude word and

37:59

then I didn't. So what was

38:01

in the fridge? In the sense

38:03

that, um, that was the thing,

38:05

the, the, it was everything. It

38:07

was the most, it was the

38:09

most, I've never seen a fridge

38:11

quite so full of food. Have

38:13

you said that? I remember when

38:15

I, I met a porn performer,

38:17

a male, porn performer called, um,

38:20

Tommy gun, and um, halfway through

38:22

his sex. Like an astronaut. Yeah,

38:24

like an astronaut. Like an energy.

38:26

Like a little like football players

38:28

doing it. And it was like,

38:30

what is that? Is it a

38:32

protein? It was almost like, it

38:34

was to keep. Probably needed the

38:36

energy to get his hydration. He

38:38

was halfway through the scene. It

38:40

was really striking because, do you

38:42

mind me, you were asking me,

38:45

you were asking me, so basically,

38:47

in the world of porn, keeping

38:49

an erection is for the man,

38:51

the job, right? Right. Yeah. You

38:53

could almost argue. It's not the

38:55

only job, but it's the main

38:57

job, because the other jobs are

38:59

being nice on set, turning up

39:01

on time, etc. Be respectful. But

39:03

the Cne qua non, the must

39:05

have, is a hard penis. I'm

39:07

sorry to put it so bluntly.

39:10

And I remember seeing him, but

39:12

it's interesting when you, because in

39:14

the Me Too era, it's like,

39:16

well, it's really odd to manage

39:18

the social niceties in a world

39:20

where your erect penises is absolutely

39:22

central to the job. And I

39:24

remember seeing this guy, Tommy doing

39:26

a scene, and the minute they

39:28

cut, the woman pulled away and

39:30

that was it. And I remember

39:32

thinking, that's interesting because you might

39:34

think, oh, he needs a little

39:37

help. Like, I don't know, like,

39:39

that was a prejudice that I

39:41

brought, like, actually, you know, that

39:43

you, that you, that you, they're,

39:45

they're filming the sex, but actually...

39:47

Well, because there's a two, three

39:49

minute break. Oh, to keep it

39:51

up. Yeah. And at that point,

39:53

he's going to droop. Right. She

39:55

did. She broke away. And I

39:57

was like, OK, I guess that

39:59

how it works. And I said

40:02

to Tommy, like, so is that

40:04

all? and he says well some

40:06

people do it like that you

40:08

know it's called wood management like

40:10

but you know and I personally

40:12

I would prefer wood management but

40:14

you know because of wood she's

40:16

meant to manage his dick well

40:18

not meant to but I think

40:20

he was saying it would be

40:22

easier for him if if she

40:24

if between scenes she kept there

40:26

was some there was the intimacy

40:29

continued right but but that's obviously

40:31

you know, a case-by-case basis. And

40:33

then, and that may be why,

40:35

my point is that maybe why

40:37

he needed the protein stick. Can

40:39

I, can I, would you like

40:41

some onions and, um, it's a

40:43

strange, I mean, it's a, it's

40:45

a, what can you say, like,

40:47

among professions, like, it's obviously, the

40:49

idea of having sex for a

40:51

living. Because it's not really sex,

40:54

is it, is it, it's acting?

40:56

But it was sex. Well, here's

40:58

the thing. It is really sex.

41:00

You think it really is sex?

41:02

Well, yeah, it is in the

41:04

sense that they're having sex. Oh,

41:06

that's true. You know what I

41:08

mean? That's the only thing that

41:10

isn't actually. Maybe not making love.

41:12

Do you mean anything? Yeah. It

41:14

definitely is sex. Okay. Do you

41:16

like the pie? Did you make

41:18

the pie? No. It's delicious. Dear

42:04

old work platform. It's not you.

42:06

It's us. Actually, it is you.

42:08

Endless onboarding? Constant IT bottlenecks? We've

42:11

had enough. We need a platform

42:13

that just gets us. And to

42:15

be honest, we've met someone new.

42:18

They're called monday.com. and it was

42:20

love at first onboarding. They're beautiful

42:22

dashboards, they're customizable workflows, got us

42:25

floating on a digital cloud nine,

42:27

so no hard feelings, but we're

42:29

moving on. monday.com, the first work

42:32

platform you'll love to use. And

46:26

this is so small and technical, but the

46:28

line I did was, Joan said she

46:30

was always, you know, it was one of

46:32

her favorite restaurants and they were always

46:34

pleased to see her. And then I

46:36

say, but on this occasion, not so much.

46:38

And then we see to them saying,

46:40

she goes, are they? Do they know we're

46:43

here? And I saw that was like,

46:45

I wish I hadn't said on this occasion

46:47

not so much. Didn't need to. Right,

46:49

okay. It's a really small thing. Yeah.

46:51

It's a really small thing. But you can't

46:53

ruminate on things like that. I can.

46:55

I can. So you're going to be better.

46:58

I think, I do think that you

47:00

could improve and that maybe the lesson is

47:02

you just, you got to, you think

47:04

that you are there and then you

47:06

just keep working and work like work harder

47:08

on the writing, work harder on the

47:10

framing and the structure. The Joe Exotic when

47:13

I looked at last night, there was

47:15

a bit where I was like that. this

47:17

part of the story like the hinge

47:19

isn't quite right the writing doesn't feel quite

47:21

right anyway there's so much that I

47:23

regret there's so much that I regret

47:25

there's a whole thing seen I wish we'd

47:27

shot with the Joe Exotic film where

47:29

he was going to they were going to

47:32

campaign for his release and then we're

47:34

going to go to Washington DC and we

47:36

were offered a flight on his lawyer's

47:38

plane and then we just let it

47:40

slide and just things like that I think

47:42

I could have been slightly better you

47:44

know could have been slightly better They said,

47:47

like, something about when's your happiest moment

47:49

in creating a film? He said, well, at

47:51

the moment I get the idea. And

47:53

then everything after that is a compromise.

47:55

Interesting. Which is something in that. Everything after

47:57

that. I don't absolutely line up with

47:59

that. There is a sense in which

48:01

there are small failings and little

48:04

bits that you wish you could

48:06

do differently or do over and

48:08

as it goes on, you're pleased

48:11

with how it turns out, but

48:13

more often than not there

48:15

are little things that you

48:17

feel actually could slight, especially

48:19

with the hindsight and the

48:21

passage of time. I'm going to

48:24

have one more tiny slide. How

48:26

are we doing for time?

48:28

Oh God, I'm late. I'm

48:30

late. You can't go ahead

48:33

and eat that

48:36

pie. Yeah. Lou

48:39

Thru, what

48:41

is a

48:44

very nostalgic

48:46

taste for

48:48

you that

48:50

can take

48:53

you back somewhere?

48:57

ha ha ha It's

49:00

funny isn't because the taste

49:02

that sets a sense of

49:05

taste and smell are the

49:07

most closely associated with with

49:09

memory. You know this isn't the

49:11

answer probably you're looking for.

49:14

Basically today I had a

49:16

weird thing where what was I

49:18

cooking? I was making something I

49:21

don't know what it was. Well

49:23

a nice? Myrben or lunch. There

49:25

was something what was I doing?

49:29

I might have even have been cleaning

49:31

out an old like something that had

49:34

like an old something that had food

49:36

that had gone off a bit

49:38

cleaning out. I love leftovers and I got

49:40

a whiff of the smell and it

49:42

was this kind of strange congealed meat

49:45

that they used to feed to cats

49:47

in the 70s. Do you know what

49:49

I'm talking about? This is a very

49:51

pristine but yeah carry on. Really. Only

49:53

in the sense that I was like

49:56

I almost called my brother when we

49:58

got our kittens. I was 9 and

50:00

he was probably 11 and they

50:02

said they're so young you can't

50:04

give them normal cat food so

50:06

you have to go to the

50:08

pet store and get this special

50:10

and it was like this congealed

50:12

slop I don't even know it's

50:14

like a gravy yeah but it

50:16

was solid like a jelly mm-hmm

50:18

it was like a slab a

50:20

slab of like weird toxic meat

50:22

that was like so strange there

50:24

was no other smell I'm but

50:26

I never thought about that smell

50:29

and then when I was whatever

50:31

I was doing this afternoon cleaning

50:33

out this top of wear thing

50:35

that had gone to the dark

50:37

side and I got the whiff

50:39

and I was like oh my

50:41

god that's taking me back to

50:43

South London and that strange gelatinous

50:45

slab of gray meat and and

50:47

and how weird that was. I

50:49

know that doesn't really answer your

50:51

question but it actually does. But

50:53

it was the two things the

50:55

two takeaways were one was Wow,

50:57

these these sensory moments create pathways,

50:59

almost like straight back into time,

51:01

like 40 years or like that,

51:03

it was like a corridor instantaneously,

51:05

as you said, like, Proust? Do

51:07

you remember what the Proust... Clementsines,

51:09

or Madeline, it was a Madeline,

51:11

it was a Madeline, but not

51:13

just a Madeline, what was it?

51:15

Was a Madeline dipped in tea.

51:17

Oh, lovely. Yeah, and it takes

51:19

him back, and he describes, the

51:21

metaphor he uses, he says, it's

51:23

like putting, like a piece of

51:25

paper, you know, there's a piece

51:27

of paper that you put in

51:29

water, and it blooms like it

51:31

turns into a flower, and his

51:33

Madeline in his tea created this

51:35

combination of sensations that took him

51:37

back to his childhood in combo.

51:39

And for me it was like

51:41

this rancid bit of meat that

51:43

was in an old chili that

51:45

I found in the Tupperware. It

51:47

took me back to this toxic

51:49

meat slab that I fed to

51:52

the cats, the kittens when I

51:54

had them. It was exquisite and

51:56

beautiful. What were your kittens called?

51:58

Scratch and kipper. Good names. Yeah.

52:00

You didn't finish your food. I'd

52:02

like, I'm, do you want, no,

52:04

I just, I'm, you can have

52:06

another piece. I'm not, I'm not,

52:08

I'm not a big girl. No,

52:10

I'm really full, that was so

52:12

delicious. I'm gonna have to think

52:14

about making a move in a

52:16

minute as well. That was so

52:18

delicious. That was so delicious. I

52:20

mean, that was so delicious. I

52:22

mean, I wish I could cycle

52:24

home now. Are you worried about

52:26

having eaten too much? Yeah, it

52:28

would be a nice way to

52:30

just sort of enjoy the food

52:32

as it joggles up and down

52:34

in my tummy. Because that would

52:36

be my idea of absolute hell.

52:38

I would be not wanting to

52:40

do that. Blending it. Blending it.

52:42

Can I ask quickly, what is

52:44

the one food that you don't

52:46

think you could live without? I

52:50

could live without any food. No,

52:52

like, what do you like in

52:54

your kitchen, more might fix something

52:56

else? Fish fingers? You like, do

52:58

you eat them now? No, I

53:00

don't eat them. No, of course

53:02

I eat them. But like, when

53:05

was the last time we had

53:07

fish fingers? They're always are fish

53:09

fingers in my freezer. Really? I've

53:11

been having them this week, but

53:13

I probably would have had them

53:15

last week. Well, how would you

53:17

be having them? Yeah. Oh my

53:19

god, Louis. He's all gone wrong.

53:21

Just gone to like Westminster. Fucking

53:23

year nine. Fuxing. In a sandwich.

53:26

Fishfinger sandwich. By the way, I

53:28

think that's a respectable culinary practice.

53:30

I think it is actually now.

53:32

I hate to break it. I

53:34

hate to break it. I hate

53:36

to break it. I hate to

53:38

break it. It's your kids fish

53:40

finger. Yeah. They spit it out

53:42

on my. Oh God, delicious. Delicious.

53:44

And here's what you're going to

53:46

do. lightly toast the bread, butter

53:49

it, yeah, white or brown? You

53:51

probably go brown. Would you go

53:53

tartar or mayonnaise? No, no, no.

53:55

No. Dry. No. Then, and also

53:57

toast them under the, I mean,

53:59

the fish fingers under the grill,

54:01

right? Don't fry them. Don't fry

54:03

them, don't cook them in the

54:05

oven. That's really important. In fact,

54:07

that's the only golden rule. And

54:10

then flip them two or three

54:12

times. So they're really crispy on

54:14

the outside and hot and moist

54:16

on the inside. Yeah. And then

54:18

while they're still really hot, great

54:20

some... cheddar cheese, could be able

54:22

to cheese, could put some borsal

54:24

on there or soft cheese. Game

54:26

change of juice. And then a

54:28

liberal sprinkling of tobacco, tobacco sauce.

54:30

Don't give you the children that.

54:33

And that sounds good. Grind a

54:35

bit of salt, a bit of

54:37

pepper. Any salad? Any salad? Any

54:39

salad? I'm going to do a

54:41

cookbook. Are you? Probably not. But

54:43

if I were. It's going to

54:45

be called jump to recipe. jump

54:47

to I know because I love

54:49

it when it says you know

54:51

when you get because it's all

54:54

like shit it's all like they

54:56

have all the efforts and they

54:58

tell you about them fucking making

55:00

it like how you do it

55:02

like that came over and then

55:04

another thing is I love onions

55:06

and you're like I don't I

55:08

haven't got time but it's a

55:10

jump to recipe and we on

55:12

the cover and I'll be jumping

55:14

I'll be in mid air that

55:17

would be great with my thumbs

55:19

like that it's called jump to

55:21

recipe to recipe Louis through his

55:23

no bullshit guide to making delicious

55:25

food. I think like you've just

55:27

got yourself a book deal. If

55:29

you're out there, right? Jump to

55:31

recipe. Yeah. Jump to recipe. I

55:33

don't, I'm like, this isn't a

55:35

hobby. I don't want to read

55:38

about, oh, you know, this, I

55:40

just need the recipe. Yeah. You

55:42

know what I mean? Yeah. That's

55:58

in a spin, darling. Louisa has

56:00

an absolute Ranger. It all got

56:03

quite squiffy at the end. Yeah.

56:05

I don't know if he actually

56:07

answered one question. He didn't give

56:09

us a pudding, did he? No,

56:11

but he liked mine. He did

56:14

like yours. He loved the pie.

56:16

He loved the pie. Three sizes.

56:18

Thank you, Johnny. Thank you, Johnny.

56:20

He's now like tying with who

56:22

could three servings. Did Ed Shearhan

56:25

have four servings? Yeah. So he's

56:27

second place. Ed Milliband had three

56:29

servings. So Louis and Ed, Milliband?

56:31

Yeah. He's really brilliant. He's entertaining.

56:33

He's so terrifyingly intelligent. Yeah. and

56:36

completely immature. I don't know if

56:38

it's immature. He's got a very...

56:40

He loves talking about willies, I've

56:42

realised too. Yeah, we had cherubs

56:44

with willies. We had like him

56:47

talking about... The would... He loves

56:49

it. Loves it. Frisky Fridays with

56:51

Louis Thoreau. That's the new season.

56:53

Louis podcast is on Spotify. You

56:55

can listen to it. He is...

56:58

excellent. A bit jealous of his

57:00

cookbook name. Yeah that is brilliant.

57:02

Jump to jet recipe is so

57:04

clever. But yeah that went that

57:06

went off-piced and I liked it.

57:09

I enjoyed it very very much.

57:11

Good good. Thank you to Louis

57:13

Thoreau for coming over here and

57:15

saying that you had to leave

57:17

at 830 and you've left at

57:20

25 past 9. We love it.

57:22

Punch are on the way. Punch.

57:25

It's now a black

57:27

cab. Going to pin the

57:29

car. There's some black cab

57:32

driver thing I've got

57:34

Louisa in the car.

57:36

I've got to pick his

57:38

eyes. And his beanie and

57:41

he's got to sort,

57:43

he's got to get

57:45

the bloody bike in

57:47

there, good luck mate. Yeah.

57:49

You can watch all

57:51

of Louis documentaries on

57:53

I-player, you can listen to

57:56

his podcast. And, um... We've

57:58

learned a lot, darling.

58:00

I feel like I

58:02

can read the biographies.

58:04

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Then you

58:07

know their secrets before

58:09

they know that. That

58:11

is an excellent bit of

58:13

Intel. Thank you for listening.

58:16

and we'll see you

58:18

next week. Here's a

58:20

show that we recommend.

58:22

Welcome to Jessica things. It's

58:24

your sister, Jesse Wu.

58:26

You may know me

58:28

from Wild and Out, Dish

58:31

Nation, All Blacks, Alec Hart,

58:33

and so many other

58:35

platforms. Jessica Couple Things

58:37

is a podcast where

58:39

we're edition all things pop

58:42

culture, as well as

58:44

comedic story times. Give

58:46

my podcast a follow and

58:48

make sure that you subscribe,

58:51

subscribe, so you never

58:53

miss out on an

58:55

episode. Acast

58:59

helps creators launch, grow,

59:01

and monetize their podcast

59:04

everywhere. acast.com