0:00

Hi friends, look them

0:02

to another episode of

0:04

That Sounds Fun. The

0:07

seasons. I'm your host,

0:09

Annie F. Downs. I'm

0:11

so happy to be

0:13

here with you today. Today on

0:16

the show, we are answered a

0:18

question that a lot of you

0:20

have been asking. Me too. Why

0:22

does the winter feel so long?

0:24

Before we dive into this conversation,

0:27

though, I want to tell you

0:29

about one of our incredible sponsors.

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That Sounds Fun. today on the

1:32

show. I get to talk with

1:34

my friends, Rebecca St. James, and

1:36

her husband, Cubby Fink. You may

1:38

know Cubby Fink as one of

1:40

the founding members of Foster the

1:42

People. He's also an incredible producer,

1:44

a creative force, and joining him

1:46

is his life, our friend, Rebecca

1:48

St. James, Grammy and Dove award-winning

1:50

Christian artist, worship leader, author, and

1:52

all around wonderful human. I think

1:54

we're all feeling a little over

1:56

this winter at this point, so

1:58

we're gonna talk about why it

2:00

feels so long and how handle

2:03

it and we get to talk

2:05

about Cubby and Beck's new book

2:07

about their life and their marriage

2:09

called Lasting Ever. If you're following

2:11

along in your TSF Seasons guidebook,

2:13

you're going to want to take

2:15

notes on page 25. As always,

2:17

if you still haven't gotten the

2:19

guidebook and you'd like that, especially

2:21

because spring pages are coming soon,

2:23

we're going to email them out

2:25

on March 17th. You can find

2:27

all of that at Annie fdowns.com.com/seasons.com/seasons.

2:29

in Rebecca St. James. Cubby

2:31

you never been on

2:34

that sounds fun. Are you

2:36

nervous? What have you

2:38

been told? What have you

2:40

heard? I've heard it's fun.

2:43

So I'm not nervous. that you are

2:45

so we I mean we just talked about it

2:47

off air but you are so deep in my

2:49

circle of trust like there's so much love I

2:51

just feel I hope that you just feel that

2:54

yes the friend love just emanating right now because

2:56

it's there and he feels that he knows when

2:58

we hang out we get the best girl time

3:00

yeah yeah yeah I agree he's just welcomed into

3:02

the fold I'm just offended you haven't heard that

3:05

I'm like a journalist to be afraid of no

3:07

none of that No. Tough. No. Yeah, I

3:09

guess it's true. It's really true. Thank

3:11

you all for joining us as we

3:13

are finishing up winter. We are walking

3:16

toward the spring. Hallelujah. Right. I mean,

3:18

it just feels, I think everyone is.

3:20

feeling that at this point of why

3:22

has this felt so long? We all

3:24

kind of took for a minute either

3:26

in, I mean, that's one of the

3:28

things I love is you're Australian. And

3:30

so it's literally not winter right now.

3:32

Yes. So let me first do that

3:34

and then we're going to go to

3:36

the serious question. What does it feel

3:39

like in Australia when a majority of

3:41

the, well all the American media and

3:43

entertainment is cold and winter and like

3:45

Christmas movies are snowy and you are

3:47

at the beach. That's the only moment

3:49

that you kind of wrestle a little.

3:51

a little bit with it growing up,

3:53

is when you're singing about, I'm dreaming

3:55

of a white Christmas and you're just

3:58

going, this is not my experience. And

4:00

we'll never be. We'll never be. Like

4:02

unless I mean, unless we move to

4:04

the other side of the world. But

4:06

at that point, growing up, until I

4:08

was 14, I didn't know that that

4:11

was going to happen. So, but I

4:13

have gotten the experience, the White Christmases,

4:15

and he proposed to me on a

4:17

white Christmas in Tennessee, which is just

4:19

so cool. A tender Tennessee Christmas, some

4:22

might say. Yeah, some might say. Like

4:24

can we go? This is going to

4:26

sound so uneducated so uneducated, so uneducated.

4:29

Um, no. Okay. Not that I know of. It's

4:31

a really, somebody should do it though. Hard

4:33

hitting, journalism. Yes, it is. Yes, it is.

4:35

I just assumed there's a chance that there's

4:37

an entire culture of Christmas summer that I

4:39

just have never been exposed to because I've

4:41

never gone there. See, that's your next album.

4:44

All right, there it is. I'm here to

4:46

serve. Yeah, thank you. Okay, so for all

4:48

of us, we're living in winter. And for,

4:50

I mean, one of the things we keep

4:52

talking about this year is no matter what's

4:54

happening in the weather outside, you can be

4:56

in a winter in your life. And you

4:59

can be experiencing winter in some really profound

5:01

ways. Even if you're in a summer, or a

5:03

spring, even if you're in a summer or a spring,

5:05

it could be so beautiful outside. So tell me what

5:07

y'all do. I mean, there's a whole chapter in your

5:09

new book called the new book called the winter season,

5:11

which is one of the winter season, which is one

5:13

of the winter season, which is one of the winter

5:15

season, What do you do in the winter

5:18

feels long? Like, let's just get to it.

5:20

What do you do? Can I tell you

5:22

something that's really fresh, actually, that

5:24

I don't think I've ever really

5:26

spoken about before, actually, other than

5:28

maybe with Cubby. But I felt this

5:31

particular winter that God said, I want

5:33

you to have eyes for the beauty

5:35

of this season. Wow. And I want

5:37

you to look at it. through this lens of

5:40

like intentionally looking for the beauty and for

5:42

the good and it was more this like

5:44

physical call to it it was more like

5:46

okay look out at the skeleton trees and

5:49

I know you want to see green and

5:51

you want to see life and that brings

5:53

you a lot of joy but there's beauty

5:55

there to be seen look at this look

5:57

at it you know the branches against the

6:00

sky and the loveliness of

6:02

that. And it's just been

6:04

really interesting, and not that

6:06

I've given tremendous amounts of time

6:09

to this concept, but I do

6:11

think he was just trying

6:13

to encourage me in this physical

6:15

world to do something that I

6:17

can do also in my emotional world.

6:20

So instead of feeling like this winter

6:22

is so threatening, I'm cold, I don't

6:24

want to be cold, I don't want

6:27

to have to bundle up every time

6:29

I go out, I don't like being

6:31

cold. And as an Australian, that is

6:33

my thing. I mean, I love warm,

6:36

I love being outside. But in emotional

6:38

times too, where I'm just feeling

6:40

cold and sad, to not feel

6:42

so threatened by it, and just

6:44

for him to go with this

6:46

beauty there too back. Anyway, that's

6:48

recent. Like, that's just a really recent, almost

6:50

a bit of an epiphany of going, just

6:52

don't be so threatened by it. Both the

6:55

emotional winter as well as the physical. We

6:57

just had Maddie Jackson on and she wrote

6:59

a book on grief and she said, it's

7:01

just every day you ask God for the

7:04

hope for that day. Yeah. It's good. So

7:06

it's almost like you're reminding us as well

7:08

to like, just look for the beauty and

7:10

today. Yes. And if today's winter or just

7:12

look for it. Just look for it. let

7:15

the season progress. Yes. Kabi, what about, when

7:17

you think about a long winter, this is

7:19

going to be a sexist comment I'm

7:21

about to make. Okay. Congratulations. I think

7:23

the men in my life think they

7:25

can do more to fix and change,

7:27

like, well, what can I do? What

7:29

should I do? And so, is that

7:31

true? I mean, do you ever think

7:33

like, I can get us out of

7:35

this. I mean in the book, in

7:37

the winter season, there is some movement

7:40

of you going like, what's mine to

7:42

do here? How do we know what's

7:44

ours to do when winter feels long

7:46

and what's ours to just let God

7:48

hold? Yeah, I think that is such a delicate

7:50

balance because I think we don't

7:53

want to get ahead of God,

7:55

but we also don't want to become

7:57

so complacent that we just

7:59

get. stuck. And I think

8:02

finding that balance of being proactive to

8:04

the point where you're still kind of

8:06

on the heels of Jesus but not

8:08

passing him is kind of where we're

8:10

called to to reside in the the

8:12

the saying living in the dust of

8:14

your rabbi and just kind of being

8:16

right on the heels of Jesus but

8:18

not getting ahead of him and I

8:20

think yes as as men as doers

8:22

as fixers it's it's easy to kind

8:24

of want to just charge ahead and

8:26

in the winter season that we speak

8:28

about in the book I think there

8:30

was a Just a yearning in my heart

8:32

to have something to put my hand to because

8:34

it was suddenly I was thrust into the

8:37

season where I didn't know what to do

8:39

I'd come out of this very long career

8:41

that I thought was going to last much

8:43

longer than it did and because of a

8:45

lot of reasons that I didn't see coming

8:47

kind of thrust me into the season of

8:49

unknown and I was desperately crying out to

8:51

God What do I do with my time

8:53

now? What do I do with the things

8:55

that you give me? The giftings, the talents,

8:57

all of these things. Just show me the

8:59

field, show me the plow, let me start

9:01

plowing. And I was met with silence, which

9:03

was probably what made that season

9:06

most challenging. I mean, there was

9:08

a lot of external factors, but probably

9:10

the spiritual component was compounded by the

9:12

fact that it was the first time

9:14

in my life that I was at

9:17

a major crossroad and God wasn't infinitely

9:19

clear on what to do next. So

9:21

the silence was hard. But I think,

9:23

like you said, just trusting the

9:25

Lord is giving you just enough

9:28

to stay on his heels and

9:30

just putting one foot in front

9:32

of the other to remain in

9:34

that place. And I think that we

9:36

can try to rush out of the

9:38

winter to just because of the pain

9:40

of it or the grief of it or

9:42

the loss of it. And I

9:44

remember right when the season turned,

9:46

when the season turned from... winter

9:48

to spring for us in that most

9:51

darkest winter, you know, of our marriage.

9:53

And we've been married nearly 14 years,

9:55

which is wild. But when that turned

9:57

and it was on a particular day...

10:00

it was the most instantaneous change

10:02

of my life. I remember, you

10:04

know, I'd been in worship, I

10:06

walk off stage, I profess what

10:08

had happened, you know, to my

10:10

brother, I think this, I think

10:12

I was just done this incredible

10:15

work in my life, freeing me, I

10:17

think you might have just called me

10:19

back to music. And immediately

10:21

after that, I sensed God

10:23

say, don't rush ahead of me, I've

10:26

got this, just wait and see what

10:28

I've got for you. Like I mean,

10:30

like with his fingers under his chin,

10:32

just going, you won't even believe it.

10:34

Just trust me, but don't rush ahead

10:37

of me. And I think humanly because

10:39

we don't want to be in pain, we

10:41

can try to run out of that

10:43

winter season and instead of letting kind

10:45

of that process be what it needs

10:48

to be, and I've done that and

10:50

I can tend to do that just

10:52

like... Try to run ahead of God.

10:54

Maybe he's doing this. Maybe this is

10:56

the reason maybe this is the resolve

10:58

Maybe this is what he's going to

11:01

do and try to orchestrate it instead

11:03

of just going Lord you've got this

11:05

and I trust you and it's really

11:07

now Probably seven years after that that

11:09

I'm starting to see the fullness of

11:11

that spring and the fullness of the

11:13

why the fullness I think I knew

11:15

I thought I knew what it was

11:17

those couple years after and it wasn't what

11:19

I thought it was and I'm only having

11:21

that revealed now which is just wild. That

11:24

is the purpose of the winter. Dear everyone

11:26

this is why we journal because then we

11:28

can remember and catch all of that when

11:30

it's happening. Beck I love you so much

11:32

but my favorite line in the book is

11:35

a cubby line. That's sorry to tell you.

11:37

This is the man. I mean, I'm proud

11:39

of him. This is good. This is page

11:41

170, Covey. You say, here is a truth

11:43

I eventually arrived at in this season. This

11:46

is from the winter season chapter. When you

11:48

don't know what to do, do what

11:50

worked before and let God take it

11:52

from there. I've heard pastors say, when

11:54

you don't hear God do the last

11:56

thing you heard him say. Will you

11:58

talk about that for a second? There's

12:00

got to be people listening to us right

12:02

now going like, well I've tried everything and

12:04

nothing's worked and I've asked God and he's

12:06

silent. And so what was your process? How

12:09

do you know the last thing God said?

12:11

How do you know what to put your

12:13

hands to? Yeah, and I think I

12:15

think that comment stems from from what you've

12:17

heard from pastors well It's just it's kind

12:20

of resorting back to that last moment that

12:22

you had an encounter with God where you

12:24

felt like you gave you a bit of

12:26

direction of red crumb to go in a

12:28

certain direction Or you you go back to

12:31

the things that you know that he's grown

12:33

you in already and the things you know

12:35

That he's giving you passions and talents for

12:37

and and I think for me because I

12:39

was being met by silence because I didn't

12:42

know what to do because I was dealing

12:44

with this internal pain that was working its

12:46

way up to the surface. It was kind

12:48

of a, it became sort of a joint

12:50

venture. It was okay. I know that I'm passionate

12:52

about Jesus, I know I'm passionate about

12:54

ministry, I had a whole history of

12:57

doing ministry with youth, so it's like,

12:59

okay, let's explore that avenue. So that

13:01

was a practical thing that I could

13:03

go and explore. I ended up getting

13:05

involved with the youth group at a

13:07

local church, ended up getting hired as

13:09

an interim youth pastor, so that was

13:11

sort of practical, you know, pursuit, but

13:13

still, you know, ministry and kind of

13:15

the spiritual component as well, but then

13:17

the internal journey. began simultaneously because

13:20

there was a lot that

13:22

was sort of beginning to

13:24

present itself that there was

13:26

things that needed to be dealt

13:28

with. I think there was a

13:31

definitely a question mark for a

13:33

lot of my life over a season

13:35

or a period of my youth

13:37

that I just didn't have any

13:40

memories surrounding and which was always

13:42

strange to me because I have an

13:44

incredibly vivid memory. I mean, I

13:46

mean, I mean, clearly you have memories

13:48

in here that I'm like, I don't

13:50

remember what I have for lunch last

13:52

week and you're like, I was on a

13:55

rock. Yes, I mean, some of my earliest

13:57

memories are laying in the crib and watching

13:59

the mobiles. spin over my head. So

14:01

it's just wild. I remember everything.

14:03

There's one season I'd have no

14:06

memories from. And so that was always

14:08

strange me. Yeah. And in this winter

14:10

season, like I mentioned, there was a

14:12

lot of external factors that were really

14:15

hard. It just felt like blow after

14:17

blow after blow. But even with as

14:19

hard as it was, my... reactions

14:21

to things were not congruent with the things

14:24

I was reacting to. I used the analogy

14:26

in the book of if Rebecca was to

14:28

reach out and touch my arm just gently

14:30

I would probably just look at her

14:32

and say what do you need? But if I had

14:35

a gaping wound in my arm and

14:37

she reached out and touched me in

14:39

the same place I would have a

14:41

much more visceral reaction and jump back

14:43

and maybe scream a little bit. My

14:45

reactions weren't screaming in that season but

14:47

my emotional reactions were... the equivalent

14:49

of screaming and I would just get spun

14:52

out emotionally and just kind of end up in

14:54

a tailwind and we're in a tail spin and

14:56

and so it was proof that there was something

14:58

going on a lot deeper that that needed to be

15:00

dealt with so that kind of sent me on

15:02

the journey of okay let's let's dig into this

15:05

and see what's there and and really kind of

15:07

came to the place of saying I need help

15:09

I need help doing this found a counselor and

15:11

kind of began that journey of uncovering that maybe

15:13

only in the quiet Did all that have

15:15

a chance to 100% and we've said

15:18

that so many times it's like If

15:20

the hardness of that season was only for

15:22

us to kind of deal with things that would

15:24

have gone up, un-delt with, because when life is

15:26

easy, it's easy to cover up the pain, we

15:29

don't grow when life is hard, when life is

15:31

hard, it's kind of forced to deal with the

15:33

stuff. And the end result of you dealing with

15:35

it, and I'm so proud of, could be that

15:38

he did, you know, face some of this

15:40

childhood trauma, some of these things that were

15:42

so difficult, the end result of pressing into

15:44

that going into that, and going to going

15:46

to going to going to going to go

15:48

on, with it or getting the counseling that

15:50

you need is freedom. Right. Like it's freedom

15:52

for him to be the best version of

15:54

himself that that he can be. For me

15:57

I've done a lot of counseling too. For

15:59

me to be the best version of myself

16:01

for us to be the best version

16:03

of ourselves for our children for our

16:05

friends for our community so it's freedom

16:07

right it's not pointless pain and I

16:10

think that we also need to remember

16:12

about that when it comes to winters

16:14

you know God he he's so intentional and

16:16

he redeems and he restores but

16:18

there is purpose in it yeah

16:21

I'm going to drag this question

16:23

to you, but I think you're

16:25

going to have to be the

16:27

one answers it. Did all the

16:29

kids in the youth group think

16:31

it was so cool that the

16:33

guy from foster to people was

16:35

their youth pastor? Yes. Yes, I

16:37

knew you had to answer. I

16:39

think that had to have been very

16:42

helpful marketing wise for the church. Yeah,

16:44

it was fun. tell the story of

16:46

when y'all met. It is the cutest

16:48

meat cute in the actual world and

16:50

I know it's in the book and

16:52

people can read it but I like

16:55

in the you know cuffing season going

16:57

into people getting out in the spring

16:59

and meeting somebody tell us you're meat

17:01

cute it's adorable. You go first. Okay

17:03

well I'll set it up and then Cub

17:05

can talk about like yes I may ask

17:07

questions in the middle so we So I

17:09

was living in LA, I was doing some

17:11

acting as well as music and you know,

17:13

all of that, book writing, all the things,

17:15

but I was in LA for acting and

17:17

I had this amazing roommate, Lila Rose, and

17:19

she invited me to this philosophy

17:21

group which was started by this Catholic

17:24

guy who wanted to lay a

17:26

foundation for theology through philosophy and it

17:28

was so interesting and so fun

17:30

and such great conversations with lots of

17:32

young creatives in LA. So I had

17:35

started going to this. you know, pretty

17:37

regular event. Meanwhile, Cub was not

17:39

going to that because he was working

17:41

on a TV show during that time

17:44

and working crazy hours. But I met

17:46

two of his best friends and they

17:48

became a part of my community. And

17:50

on the way to this particular event, which

17:52

was a rap party for a TV

17:55

show that he was at, I was

17:57

hanging out with those guys and he

17:59

was at this. party and on the

18:01

way you know drive over yeah they're like

18:03

okay the guy that you're about to meet

18:05

is one of our best friends he's like

18:07

literally the best guy on the planet he's

18:10

super hot I'm quite sure they said these

18:12

are Christian guys but I'm quite there they

18:14

were like yeah he's really hot I'm a

18:16

Christian well and I know when you say

18:19

hot so yeah that's fine we're allowed to

18:21

feel that I'm a hundred percent and you're

18:23

about to meet him and we just adore

18:25

him. So they were kind of selling him,

18:27

but they really hadn't said much about it

18:30

before that. You know, I've been friends with

18:32

them for months. On the other end, Covey

18:34

had heard a little bit about me. Were

18:36

you Rebecca St. James out there or were

18:39

you Rebecca small then? Yeah, I was just

18:41

back really to people out there. I mean,

18:43

generally I think I'd get to know people

18:45

and then they'd figure out kind of who

18:47

I was on my background. that's part of

18:50

why I enjoyed being in California for 10

18:52

years was I was just just a person

18:54

and if people were friendly to me they

18:56

were friendly to me just because I was

18:58

a person yeah that's right so I'm on

19:00

the way and she's just heard of you

19:02

this is the great part it's all great

19:04

but side note I will get this far

19:06

and then he can he can take it

19:08

my song wait for me that I wrote

19:10

for cubby like maybe a decade before I

19:12

knew him and saying it around the world

19:14

you know that I'm waiting for my

19:17

husband and I was lonely doing those

19:19

years of you know singing this there's

19:21

a line in the song it says

19:23

waiting for the look in your eyes

19:26

when we meet for the first

19:28

time and when we did our

19:30

connect across that room there was

19:32

that special thing that like my

19:35

like my song so that's not

19:37

happened with anybody else no

19:39

yeah no and I'd never been

19:41

in love to this point yeah

19:43

I will say that anyway how

19:46

old are you do my asking

19:48

sorry Yeah, one. 32, yeah, around

19:50

there. 31, 32, yeah. Yeah, I was

19:52

33 when we got married, so,

19:54

yeah. Okay, hand off. Hand

19:56

off. So, I had also been

19:58

a part of this. philosophy group,

20:00

it was actually my two roommates that she had

20:02

met there. Oh, got it. And so myself and

20:05

my roommates and a handful of other guys had

20:07

gotten involved with this group and I had attended

20:09

kind of off and on for a couple of

20:11

years at that point. During the

20:13

season she started attending I was not attending

20:15

because I was just slammed on this TV

20:18

show What were you doing on the show?

20:20

Everything it was okay. So you like worked

20:22

for it. Yeah, I was in kind of

20:24

part of the production team so and it

20:27

was a small cruise It was wearing a

20:29

ton of hats and it was garage mahal

20:31

like they over they did Jay Lenos garage

20:33

and yeah, which yeah, I mean it was

20:35

fun, but just crazy. Yeah, and so anyways

20:37

She starts attending She starts

20:39

to get to know some of my friends,

20:42

her name starts getting brought up, and

20:44

it's Rebecca this, Rebecca that, she's

20:46

so cool, she's so authentic, she's

20:48

the real deal. So ears are obviously perked.

20:50

Why are you not dating his friends?

20:53

Hmm. Yeah, yeah, I just, they just like

20:55

didn't like her, they didn't go with

20:57

them. I mean, they're attractive, and I

20:59

got along great with them, it just...

21:01

They like her. Yeah. Oh my gosh. And there's

21:03

like a house full of dudes who are

21:05

like, you or me. Okay, great. This is,

21:07

this is extra content. Yeah, that's

21:09

not, that's not in the book.

21:12

Behind the scenes. Yeah, they're talking

21:14

about her while you are sitting

21:16

on the couch and you're like,

21:18

all right boys. Totally. So, so

21:20

obviously there's some interest there and

21:22

then come to find out that this

21:24

Rebecca, they're talking about is Rebecca St.

21:26

James, which was very interesting because. I

21:28

was familiar with her name, but not

21:30

her music. But I absolutely should have

21:32

been, grew up in the church, grew

21:34

up listening to Christian music. We had

21:36

her albums in our house. I have

21:39

memories of flipping through our CD collection

21:41

and seeing her record, but for right

21:43

or CD, but for whatever reason, never

21:45

pulling it on the jacket and putting

21:47

it in the player. In retrospect,

21:49

I do believe that was some divine protection

21:51

because it absolutely protected that first encounter. It

21:53

was authentic, it was real, I didn't have

21:55

her up on a pet store, it was

21:58

just boy meets girl and kind of... of

22:00

a magic moment. So fast forward

22:02

to this rap party that I

22:04

really didn't want to be at.

22:06

It was at some random house

22:08

in the Hollywood Hills and just

22:10

kind of the thing you do

22:12

in Hollywood and it's more out

22:14

of obligation than really anything else. But

22:16

out of a sense of loyalty, I

22:18

was like, all right, I'll go. But if

22:21

I'm going to go, I'm going to invite

22:23

my friends. And so I'm pulling up to

22:25

the house and I call my roommates and

22:27

I call my roommates. And

22:29

by the way, what are you by

22:32

the way, sorry? I was 27 28.

22:34

Yeah, 28. Yeah. So they're like, we're

22:36

on our way and by the way,

22:38

we're hanging out with Rebecca. I

22:40

was like, bring her along. Yeah.

22:42

So 20, 30 minutes go by.

22:45

I'm kind of buried in

22:47

the living room with a

22:49

bunch of people in conversation

22:51

and it's kind of one

22:53

of those. mid-century modern

22:55

split-level situations where the living

22:57

room is a little bit

22:59

lower than the entryway. You can hear

23:02

he's a director, right? He just sees

23:04

things in such detail. Yeah. And I

23:06

kind of look up to the entryway,

23:08

I see the front door open, and

23:11

sure enough there come my roommates, and

23:13

they cause a bit of a seeing,

23:15

because they're both very bronzed from beach

23:18

volleyball and long hair. Yeah. And so

23:20

they walk through the door. And then

23:22

Rebecca crosses a threshold and it was

23:25

literally one of those magic movie moments

23:27

where time just started to slow down,

23:29

the music faded, wind was blowing through

23:32

her hair, doves come flying through her.

23:34

Not really. I mean, not to that

23:36

degree, but it was a special moment.

23:39

Like there was absolutely a moment where

23:41

from across the room we locked eyes

23:43

and something happened. And I just sensed

23:45

just such a depth. depth and beauty

23:48

and just so much there in that

23:50

in that first glance. Yeah. And the

23:52

funny part is she was she answers

23:54

the house and right behind her was

23:56

the leader of the philosophy group. A

23:58

philosophy guy as he's called. There's

24:00

philosophy guy and then there

24:03

is production girl. Pretty easy

24:05

girl. Yeah, we've got a

24:07

couple of other characters trying

24:09

to ruin this. I mean you are.

24:12

So you can get the full scoop

24:14

as if you read the book. Yes.

24:16

You are so funny in the story

24:18

in the book to be like and

24:21

then they he was trying to do

24:23

this and she was trying to

24:25

talk to me about. in that

24:27

moment because let me tell you

24:29

the cynic and me not about

24:31

y'all about myself and about my own

24:33

life is like I've maybe felt that three

24:35

times or thought I did because I haven't

24:37

felt it you know so then you go

24:39

well but then it didn't work or then

24:41

I had to try to order then he

24:44

goes or whatever so how did you

24:46

what did you do from that moment

24:48

that made it different because that moment

24:50

was different and then what did

24:52

you do in response to the

24:54

different moment I think I mean a I

24:56

always tried to be real intentional about

24:59

who I was dating, like that this

25:01

has a chance of being the one,

25:03

but I'd never fallen in love and,

25:05

you know, I probably did guard my heart

25:07

a lot. And I did get hurt

25:09

a lot. I was disappointed a lot.

25:11

So I kind of... I think generally when

25:14

I met someone I'd be like oh yeah

25:16

you know I'm attracted to them but I

25:18

don't I'm not sure that I really like

25:20

them like I wouldn't admit that to myself

25:23

but with him I remember driving away going

25:25

I like that guy and there was a

25:27

depths and a wisdom and like it's

25:29

just a deep well component to cubby

25:31

when I was super attracted to him

25:33

obviously but there was just this other

25:36

component of this guy's been through some

25:38

things in his life and I feel

25:40

like I could respect him like I

25:42

think there was pretty instant respect and

25:44

I feel like he has a similar

25:47

soul to me and that I tell

25:49

you what that that first perception of

25:51

I think this could be almost like

25:53

my male counterpart you know that we

25:55

have a similar soul is so true

25:57

because he's so different to me like

26:00

He's quieter, more introverted, more

26:02

guarded. I'm like, you know,

26:04

outgoing, very extroverted, just,

26:06

you know, oldest child,

26:09

all of that. And we're so

26:11

different, but then I feel like we're

26:13

two peas and a part in

26:15

that there's the same soul component.

26:17

So I think what I really

26:19

had to work on, honestly, what

26:21

it was different, was I think

26:23

I knew I really liked him.

26:25

kind of falling in love, but

26:27

it was the first time I'd

26:30

ever prayed. Lord, if this is the

26:32

guy for me, help me to let

26:34

go of my heart enough to actually

26:36

fall in love with him. I think

26:38

it was the first time I'd ever

26:41

prayed that, because I could sense that

26:43

this guardedness that I'd put around my

26:45

heart, that I'd built up over years

26:47

of kind of disappointment, was there. I

26:50

knew I was falling for him, but

26:52

there was resistance out of fear and

26:54

self-protection. And so I just said, Lord.

26:57

And after that one convo? No, no, no,

26:59

this is a little bit further down the

27:01

track. This is after dating for a few

27:03

months. I felt myself falling in love, but

27:05

I was like, Lord, you're going to have

27:07

to free me up to really go here

27:09

because I'm scared. Did you get a phone

27:12

number that night? No. No, I didn't. And that's

27:14

how I was going to ask you to

27:16

ask you. I answer your question. What was

27:18

different for me. I didn't get her number

27:20

and I didn't give her mine. And I

27:23

think there was a, I, in previous

27:25

interactions were circumstances with girls where

27:27

it's like, oh, there's something kind

27:29

of cool here, like, and then

27:31

that immediately is followed by the

27:33

sense of anxiety and wanting to

27:35

control it. And it's like, okay,

27:37

I gotta do everything I can

27:39

do to lock this down to

27:41

make sure it works. But by

27:43

the end of that conversation, I

27:45

mean, we probably talk a sense

27:47

of like. peace and security that

27:49

if this is from the Lord then I don't

27:52

need to worry about it. And then there

27:54

was that moment where I said okay this

27:56

is the moment that I should probably get a

27:58

number if I'm going to but I

28:00

just felt sort of a pause and just

28:02

said, no, God, this is in your hands.

28:05

I trust that if we're going to meet

28:07

again, it will happen. Beck, were you so

28:09

annoyed? No, I wasn't actually, and it didn't

28:11

hit me weird. And because you know

28:13

what, I think it was. Not that

28:15

you're annoying, Kummy, but if I was

28:18

having that, I'd be like, and now

28:20

I go home. I mean, now we

28:22

have Instagram, but I knew we would

28:24

hang out because the because the friend

28:26

group. But I think there was such

28:28

a quiet confidence on him, such a

28:30

sense of security that was so attractive

28:32

to me. And I think that was

28:34

part of it. I think the fact

28:36

that he wasn't kind of rushing and

28:38

scrambling to like lock this thing down.

28:40

I don't know. I wonder if that

28:42

was part of it, because I sense

28:44

such a quiet strength in him. Um,

28:46

which immediately made me like, go, I

28:48

really like that guy. I love this.

28:50

So are you telling me y'all

28:52

just walked away and you're like,

28:55

can't wait to see her again?

28:57

I'm gonna love her forever. And

28:59

we'll see how God does. It

29:01

was the, I'll see you soon.

29:04

Yeah, I'll see how God does. It

29:06

was the, I'll see you soon.

29:08

Yeah, I'll see you. It was

29:10

a minute after that. It was

29:12

a minute after that. It was a

29:14

couple weeks. It was a couple weeks. And

29:16

at that point, after the couple weeks, I

29:18

was like, huh. Yeah, I do remember.

29:20

I mean, because it was, yeah, it

29:23

was, it was, I mean, I just wrapped the

29:25

show, but in the midst of working on

29:27

the show, we were also working on this

29:29

band. So all of my free time was

29:31

devoted to this band. And so we were

29:33

gearing up to head out of town to

29:35

go to South by Southwest. And so there

29:38

was a lot of shows leading up to

29:40

that. It was just kind of a crazy

29:42

season, but I had invited her that night

29:44

to a show, the last show that we

29:46

played in L.A. before going to Southbound. And

29:48

it was one of those things where in L.A.

29:50

you throw at invitations and I'm like, yeah, I'll

29:52

be there. It sounds great. And they never show

29:55

up. So that is every town USA. We will

29:57

say I'll be there and don't show up. So,

29:59

but yeah. Especially. And sometimes national. So she'd

30:01

expressed a lot of interest that night

30:03

when I told her about the show.

30:05

I'd love to be there. And I

30:07

was like, cool, I'll put you on

30:10

the list. And honestly, didn't think she

30:12

was going to show. So that was

30:14

the next time I saw her, was

30:16

while I was setting up my gear

30:18

on stage to play the show, I

30:20

look out into the crowd. And there

30:23

she is right in the middle. Did

30:25

you become with a friend or did

30:27

you come by yourself? I think I

30:29

came by myself. I think I did.

30:31

My girl. My girl. And so that

30:33

was kind of our first date was

30:35

that night because we ended up hanging

30:38

out after the show. Is this one

30:40

your parents were at? Yes. That are

30:42

young. That is, I mean your parents

30:44

meeting her on the second time you've

30:46

ever seen her? I know. I know.

30:48

I know. Great. And you really did

30:50

read the book. Thank you. Hey

30:58

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fun. So

34:32

that night you go on a date

34:34

after that and then do you get

34:37

her phone number? Yes. Yeah, okay great

34:39

Yeah, because then you just what are

34:41

you gonna do? How do you know?

34:43

Yeah So this is 15 years ago

34:45

So 2010 that's not that long ago.

34:47

So did you because I'm like did

34:50

you have flip phones? No, we had

34:52

iPhones. This was not that long ago.

34:54

It's only 15 years ago Because what

34:56

I'm thinking about is we have so

34:58

many friends who are dating that are

35:01

listening like me, your friend Anna here,

35:03

and thinking like, man, those weeks between

35:05

seeing him in the show, those are

35:07

hard. Or the like, now he has

35:09

my number and now he goes out

35:11

of town, we don't have this like

35:14

very solid thing, unless both of you

35:16

were like, no, we had a solid

35:18

thing like we knew, like, did you

35:20

know? I think we knew by the

35:22

next morning after that date, because I

35:25

mean that. probably sound really bad out

35:27

of context. Quote, quote, quote, we're going

35:29

to make it what goes on the

35:31

internet. It's the journalist. There it is.

35:33

So we're wrapping up our date after

35:36

dinner and she tells me that she's

35:38

got to get up early in the

35:40

morning to fly to a show. She

35:42

had a show the next day. Tell

35:44

this. And. I immediately said, I'd love

35:46

to take you to the airport, which

35:49

made no sense at all because I

35:51

lived in Hollywood, which was about 40

35:53

minutes from the airport, and she lived

35:55

in Manhattan Beach, which was about five

35:57

minutes from the airport. Oh my gosh.

36:00

So I was going to drive from

36:02

Hollywood to Manhattan Beach to take it

36:04

out. If he wants to, he does.

36:06

That's what we know. And she explained

36:08

to me how ludicrous the idea was.

36:10

No it's not. I will do it.

36:13

I will be there. And so I

36:15

go to bed that night, set my

36:17

alarm, fall asleep immediately, again just dead

36:19

tired in the season. My alarm goes

36:21

off seemingly moments later and I look

36:24

at it and I say, okay, it's

36:26

time to get up and then I

36:28

start thinking about it and I realize

36:30

I'd set. my alarm for the moment,

36:32

or the time that I needed to

36:34

be there, not the time I needed

36:37

to leave. So I freak out, throw

36:39

on some clothes, run down in my

36:41

truck, and just start flying down the

36:43

freeway, and sure enough she calls me

36:45

because I'm already late. I was like,

36:48

hey, I'm running a little late, but

36:50

I'm going to be there, just hold

36:52

tight, and I'm just doing... The books,

36:54

you keep saying, I'm just going to

36:56

get a cab. I'm just going to

36:59

get a cab. I did everything I

37:01

could do to convince her to convince

37:03

her to convince her not to call

37:05

a cab. I did eventually have to

37:07

do it. She finally calls a cab,

37:09

but I still drive and the craziest

37:12

thing happened. I'm pulling into LAX and

37:14

a cab pulls right in front of

37:16

me and I see the silhouette of

37:18

a girl in the back of the...

37:20

back at this cab and I called

37:23

Rebecca and I said hey I think

37:25

you just pulled right in front of

37:27

me and sure enough she was in

37:29

the cab right in front of me

37:31

followed her all the way up into

37:33

the kind of departures area we ended

37:36

up having this like really beautiful moment

37:38

where we just kind of were able

37:40

I was able to just apologize because

37:42

I felt like such an idiot but

37:44

was able to help her check in

37:47

and it was so weird because at

37:49

LAX you're constantly getting barked at to

37:51

like keep moving yeah yeah there was

37:53

this sort of a weird glitch in

37:55

the Matrix where there was no traffic

37:57

enforcers. We had like probably 10 minutes

38:00

to just kind of hang out. And

38:02

I remember the moment where she walked

38:04

away towards security and she kind of

38:06

paused and looked back and we had

38:08

one of those moments and it was

38:11

like, okay. He did the right thing.

38:13

I think this is going to work

38:15

out. He recovered it. He pursued me.

38:17

You know, that's what it was. I

38:19

think it was like really truly going

38:22

the second mile or like pursuing me

38:24

outside of his own. convenience because it

38:26

was 100% not convenient even to even

38:28

attempt it let alone to you have

38:30

that happen with his alarm and then

38:32

still follow through. So it said a

38:35

lot to me about his pursuit of

38:37

me and that he was like seriously

38:39

wanting to make me feel loved and

38:41

seen. So that was pretty big actually

38:43

early on I think. And y'all probably

38:46

remember this in this dating list ship

38:48

and in others but there is a

38:50

point in a dating list ship where

38:52

the season shifts. winter spring where you

38:54

go like oh we're actually doing this

38:56

like I don't have to I'm not

38:59

worried am I going to hear from

39:01

him I'm not I'm not like staying

39:03

up at night because I'm curious I'm

39:05

wondering if it's because it happened I'm

39:07

staying up at night because I have

39:10

so many butterflies because it is happening

39:12

right did that's is that when that

39:14

switched for you or did you still

39:16

have I'm going to hear from him

39:18

moments? We had a shift in our

39:20

relationship that probably happened six months in,

39:23

I would say. Yeah. Where, and again,

39:25

I had been hurt, so I was

39:27

kind of coming in, going, I feel

39:29

like I love this guy. We weren't

39:31

saying I love you to each other,

39:34

but we would say, I like you

39:36

a lot, a lot, or something like

39:38

that. But we knew we were both

39:40

really, you know, very, very interested. But...

39:42

There was moments, and I talk about

39:45

it in the book, you know, like,

39:47

where we went on a family vacation

39:49

with, and it was the first time

39:51

I brought a boyfriend on a family

39:53

vacation, and there was just moments where

39:55

I just felt like some of my

39:58

expectations were maybe missed. And we had

40:00

to have the sit-down talk, where it

40:02

was just like, I had to kind

40:04

of wrestle through it a little bit

40:06

with God, like, Lord, I do believe

40:09

that I've surrendered this part of my

40:11

life to you, but I feel really

40:13

vulnerable. And I really had to kind

40:15

of say to him, look, I know

40:17

God's got me, even if this doesn't

40:19

work out. I'll be okay. You have

40:22

to say that's coming. But I would

40:24

really, I would love it to work

40:26

out. But I was that moment of

40:28

kind of going, hey, you're out or

40:30

you're in in in this relationship because

40:33

I can't do, you know. these kind

40:35

of significant moments where I just feel

40:37

like I'm not really sure. Are you

40:39

all the way in? Because I'm all

40:41

the way in, but I just need

40:43

to feel like we're... pacing it at

40:46

the same time and God had really

40:48

dealt with him some fear for him

40:50

and some kind of things that he

40:52

had to let go in those days

40:54

prior and he was ready to go

40:57

all in and then it was three

40:59

months later we were engaged so it

41:01

was that pivot point of like okay

41:03

we're really going forward super intentionally or

41:05

not but God had had to do

41:08

things separately in both of us to

41:10

bring us to that point of being

41:12

all in. version of that, like that

41:14

Apex moment where you have to, where

41:16

she's asking you if you're all in,

41:18

like back me up three weeks, tell

41:21

me what was happening in your brain

41:23

that time. Yeah, so I had a

41:25

previous, my previous relationship to Rebecca was

41:27

a girl that I dated when I

41:29

was living in South Africa. Previous serious

41:32

relationship, probably, yeah, yeah, I mean you

41:34

date a little bit after that, but

41:36

not a serious man, yeah, yeah, correct,

41:38

serious, yeah. who really kind of set

41:40

a standard for the type of woman

41:42

that I could see myself marrying. Just

41:45

an amazing woman after God's heart and

41:47

just she kind of possessed all the

41:49

things that I would desire in a

41:51

wife and it ended up not working

41:53

out and at the time I was

41:56

confused by it but in the season

41:58

that followed it was like okay God

42:00

has given me you know a glimpse

42:02

of... something to aspire to and really

42:04

kept me from not settling because I

42:07

knew that did exist. It kind of

42:09

gave me hope to continue to push

42:11

forward even in the midst of Hollywood

42:13

where it's very tough to meet a

42:15

quality woman and especially one that loves

42:17

Jesus. But I knew I had this

42:20

picture of the existence of that that

42:22

type of woman. And so... So that

42:24

was really what kind of protected me

42:26

in a lot of ways in these,

42:28

you know, less serious relationships to be

42:31

like, okay, not really meeting the standard,

42:33

this is not going to go anywhere.

42:35

And without that standard, who knows, I

42:37

may have probably lowered myself and married

42:39

somebody that maybe shouldn't have, I don't

42:41

know. But I know it definitely kind

42:44

of protected me in a lot of

42:46

ways. And so now, intro Beck, she's

42:48

part of my life and we're getting

42:50

to know each other and it became...

42:52

Very clear very early on that she

42:55

not only met that standard but surpassed

42:57

it So now I'm in this place

42:59

of wrestling with oh my goodness this

43:01

standard that has protected me for the

43:03

last several years is now kind of

43:05

being eliminated and there's this new standard

43:08

kind of put in place and so

43:10

there was definitely a wrestle within me

43:12

of saying okay am I ready to

43:14

let go of the standard and give

43:16

in to this new thing and allow

43:19

myself to fall in love in a

43:21

way that I had previously but with

43:23

completely different I mean instead of parameters

43:25

and and I think There was the

43:27

rest with that, but also kind of

43:30

wrestling with letting go of that previous

43:32

relationship Because I think there was a

43:34

big part of my heart that was

43:36

still bound up in that course. Yeah,

43:38

and so it kind of hit that

43:40

point where There was definitely something holding

43:43

me back I couldn't put words on

43:45

it or words around it kind of

43:47

when she was really desiring them. So

43:49

we kind of had these few days

43:51

apart where I just really kind of

43:54

got on my face before the Lord

43:56

and said, God, just help me figure

43:58

out what's going on internally. And he

44:00

really showed me, yeah, you're hanging on

44:02

to this relationship. You're scared to let

44:04

go of this standard. And over the

44:07

course of a few days, I was

44:09

like, all right, Lord, I'm ready to

44:11

let go. I'm ready to give myself

44:13

to this new thing and allow you

44:15

to kind of take it where you

44:18

to take it where you want to

44:20

take it. And so we were able

44:22

to kind of convene over this dinner

44:24

and it was again one of those

44:26

movie moments where the world just kind

44:28

of disappeared around us and we were

44:31

just locked in this beautiful holy spirit,

44:33

beautiful commerce. conversation. So it was like

44:35

so much going on around us, but

44:37

we were in San Diego and right

44:39

on the street, like I think a

44:42

little Italian restaurant, but we had, it

44:44

was almost like you're in France or

44:46

something, you're just right there. Little Italy.

44:48

Yes, exactly. Yeah, I think we were,

44:50

right? But it was like so much

44:53

going on around us, but we were

44:55

just in this little bubble of very

44:57

significant conversation where it could have gone

44:59

one way or the other. I'm so

45:01

thankful that it went the way that

45:03

it did. I think often that we

45:06

feel the most confusion and sadness when

45:08

we don't know what's going on in

45:10

the other person. And so to be

45:12

on the other side of it and

45:14

y'all be able to reflect through the

45:17

book but also in this of going

45:19

like it is to double down on

45:21

the winter thing, it is what is

45:23

happening to the seed underground. there are

45:25

times where you are having to stand

45:27

back and go, there is a seed

45:30

here, but I cannot see if it's

45:32

growing. And you're going, like, it's growing,

45:34

like, it's growing, but I can't talk

45:36

about it either because I'm figuring it

45:38

out. And so I think there's so

45:41

much hope when we remember that there's

45:43

a lot of the story we don't

45:45

know, whether it's with a romantic partner

45:47

or a work thing or a church

45:49

thing or whatever to go like, oh,

45:51

there's just so I don't much I

45:54

don't know. I mean, so many times

45:56

I probably like, God, are you talking

45:58

to him? Like, are you, what are

46:00

you, are you, are you dealing with

46:02

him? Because I can see you're dealing

46:05

with me, but are you doing? Yes.

46:07

And so to hear the like other

46:09

side of, yeah, God was dealing with

46:11

both of you independently. Could you have

46:13

messed this up? You think you could

46:16

have missed each other? I think we

46:18

could have. some fear while we were

46:20

engaged that was probably a moment too

46:22

because You know he the band with

46:24

pumped-up kicks was rising so fast right

46:26

when we were you know planning our

46:29

engagement That they literally had a window

46:31

of a couple weeks We could get

46:33

married or it was going to be

46:35

a year. And so we like, well,

46:37

planning is not a dog. We are

46:40

not waiting here. I mean, I have

46:42

waited my whole life. Yeah, that's right.

46:44

I don't care how pumped up these

46:46

kicks. We are not getting married. I

46:48

mean, yeah, that's exactly right. So yeah,

46:50

so we had four months to plan,

46:53

you know, this wedding of my life.

46:55

And so it was a really stressful

46:57

time and I had to really go

46:59

to God and go, Lord, you know,

47:01

I know we've still got stuff to

47:04

work on. We've got some communication things.

47:06

We've got some things that, you know,

47:08

we're not all the way there. We

47:10

were doing pre-metal counseling, but he was

47:12

gone a lot. I was still doing

47:14

shows. And so it's like, you know,

47:17

we're still trying to kind of get

47:19

to know each other and grow closer

47:21

in the midst of this whirlwind engagement.

47:23

and only nine months of dating before

47:25

that. So there was some vulnerability and

47:28

fear that I had to work through.

47:30

So I think there was a couple

47:32

moments where it could have gone either

47:34

way, but I'm just so thankful that

47:36

like his grace was on it and

47:39

you know we're sitting here 14 years

47:41

later just stronger than ever having weathered

47:43

a lot of things and just thankful

47:45

because the pain and the winter has

47:47

drawn us closer in marriage and given

47:49

us what I now call marriage equity.

47:52

Like I just feel like we've got

47:54

this kind of equity to draw from

47:56

where we've clung to each other and

47:58

cried together and like struggled together and

48:00

been really vulnerable and had hard chats

48:03

and like you know parented together. We've

48:05

done a lot and it just gets

48:07

greater, it gets sweeter when you draw

48:09

closer to God and each other through

48:11

those times and there is meaning in

48:13

it. There is purpose in it. I'm

48:16

thankful for that now. One of the

48:18

things you talk about in the book,

48:20

is the prophetic part of the world,

48:22

like, and how prophetic voices matter to

48:24

you? And still, I assume, still matter

48:27

to you, some. Will you, even, because

48:29

when we're talking about this, you're like,

48:31

like, yeah, we could have missed this,

48:33

but God's grace, right? And I'm like,

48:35

okay, but, well, could you have missed

48:38

it or God's grace? Like, is there

48:40

a, is there a world, the reason

48:42

this ties? to prophetic voices to me

48:44

is I'm kind of thinking like man

48:46

there are people who think who someone

48:48

has given them a word about what

48:51

God's going to do in their life

48:53

but they're still sitting in the winter

48:55

and they feel like they've missed it.

48:57

So can you miss what God has

48:59

for you or does his or can

49:02

you not and what do you do

49:04

when you're waiting on the thing that

49:06

you think God's promised you? Just a

49:08

little light. You can also be like,

49:10

I don't want to do that. It's

49:12

a Wednesday afternoon, don't make me. Theologent.

49:15

Yeah. You're the youth faster, so let's

49:17

get it. I mean, there's definitely a

49:19

lot there to unpack and a lot

49:21

there that probably theologians that have devoted

49:23

their life to fate versus free will.

49:26

Right. Could probably speak on more eloquently.

49:28

In just looking at our situation, and

49:30

I heard somebody say recently that the

49:32

most personal is generally the most universal.

49:34

And I love that God has given

49:36

us a story that we're able to

49:39

share. And part of the prophetic word

49:41

that was even shared, I mean, spoken

49:43

over us in early engagement and early

49:45

marriage, was that we'd be stronger together

49:47

than we were apart. And we were

49:50

obviously both, you know, kind of doing

49:52

our own thing. And God had us

49:54

on these on these past doing... stuff

49:56

for him, but then together I've just

49:58

seen such a beauty in us being

50:01

able to come together and see in

50:03

the fulfillment of that word, us truly

50:05

being stronger together for his finger. Probably

50:07

saying it more now than ever. Just

50:09

with the book and partnering on this

50:11

and speaking together and all of it.

50:14

Totally. But I think when there is

50:16

rightness on something, I think God will

50:18

see it through. I think even, you

50:20

know, going back to me having that

50:22

moment of... being okay not getting her

50:25

number that night and just resting and

50:27

okay God this is in your hands

50:29

and I think as long as we're

50:31

submitting things to his hands I think

50:33

he will see it through the way

50:35

he is it which is in the

50:38

line with his will I think we

50:40

can probably get in the way, but

50:42

I think his will will continually draw

50:44

us back to where we need to

50:46

be. And it's tough to say, because

50:49

had I not gotten on my face

50:51

before the Lord to really search what

50:53

was going on in my heart that

50:55

was keeping me kind of withdrawn from

50:57

her and really giving myself to this

50:59

relationship, yeah, it may have been a

51:02

different outcome, but if the two of

51:04

us being together was the Lord's will,

51:06

it could have come around after that

51:08

night. I could have, that could have

51:10

been the, you know, the catalyst to

51:13

me getting on my face and figuring

51:15

out what was going on and then

51:17

coming back to it. It may have

51:19

delayed things, some, you know, a bit

51:21

of time, but I think, I think

51:24

there was just such a rightness on

51:26

this union that I think he would

51:28

have seen it through one way or

51:30

another. And I think, I don't know,

51:32

there, I think there is some bad

51:34

theology that we can. kind of drop

51:37

outside of the perfect will of the

51:39

Lord like there's the perfect will and

51:41

the good pleasing and perfect all right

51:43

yeah yeah but I think if we're

51:45

if we're submitting ourselves to him yes

51:48

and not getting ahead of him I

51:50

think we are in his will as

51:52

long as we're honoring him and seeking

51:54

first the kingdom of God that's good

51:56

thank you back why is it the

51:58

right time to write this book you

52:01

know this book really wasn't our idea

52:03

you know and there was a catalyst

52:05

that came, I think, from the outside

52:07

and the need that we were made

52:09

aware of through someone else. And there

52:12

was something about that advocacy piece of

52:14

somebody else going, I see a story

52:16

in you that the world needs to

52:18

hear right now. That was huge. Because

52:20

we had said early in marriage, I

52:22

think we'll probably write a book at

52:25

some point, you know, way down the

52:27

track. I think we probably would have

52:29

thought it was further away than now.

52:31

But this producer from Ansanang hero, the

52:33

movie that came out about my family

52:36

last year. came to us and said,

52:38

you know, there's a lot of discouragement

52:40

in the Christian community right now about

52:42

faith. A lot of people do. constructing

52:44

and about relationships and about marriage and

52:47

about family and all of it singleness

52:49

or just all of it there's just

52:51

so much discouragement and I think your

52:53

story needs to be heard right now

52:55

and it really resonated with us and

52:57

we're like yeah and so and then

53:00

in the process of writing the book

53:02

while this movie's coming out about you

53:04

know my family I mean it was

53:06

a lot last year was a lot

53:08

of like diving in on my story

53:11

so hardcore in every aspect of it

53:13

and every aspect of it. Yeah, yeah,

53:15

and I mean reflect on my, you

53:17

know, because of the movie reflecting on

53:19

my story and doing a lot of

53:21

media around it, but then, you know,

53:24

looking at pictures, there's pictures in the

53:26

book of, you know, our lives separately

53:28

and then together and early dating and,

53:30

you know, just all of it. And

53:32

that's so horrible. But the vulnerability, I

53:35

mean, I just think it's been so

53:37

worth it. And we've even personally, even

53:39

outside of the ministry value that we're

53:41

seeing, because we are speaking and doing

53:43

things together now, even last night we

53:45

did a NASCAR event together. And it's

53:48

so sweet to just be doing it

53:50

together. I think much of my journey

53:52

with ministry has been alone. And the

53:54

unity in this, you know, like we're...

53:56

we're doing Fox and Friends and like

53:59

good morning America and things like this

54:01

but we're doing it together and I'm

54:03

so excited to do it. So I

54:05

just think it does feel any like

54:07

it's for such a time as this

54:10

like I think people before we even

54:12

say anything I think people singing a

54:14

married couple doing something together that alone

54:16

how countenances and the joy in in

54:18

relationship that speaks. to a world that

54:20

is stressed and sad and discouraged. So

54:23

I'm excited about just that component, like

54:25

the symbolism of marriage. And not that

54:27

we're getting it perfect, my goodness, we

54:29

talk in the book a lot about

54:31

our inadequacies and our insecurities and the

54:34

ways that we've navigated things imperfectly. it's

54:36

you know, there's a lot of that

54:38

too and we want to be really

54:40

authentic. But we really do want to

54:42

be where God wants us and we

54:44

just sent such a rightness in this

54:47

timing. It's really sweet and really redemptive.

54:49

Yeah. My nephew Sam, he's been taking

54:51

his high health vitamins and we asked

54:53

him recently what he thought about him.

54:55

He said, and I quote, they're good.

54:58

A man, a few words, but you

55:00

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55:02

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57:35

glorify app for free glorified dash app.com/that

57:37

sounds fun and now back to finish

57:39

up our conversation with cubby and back.

57:41

in our little think family. Yeah, in

57:44

the think family and the five of

57:46

y'all. It feels spring-like to me. You

57:48

know, and we've come out of that

57:50

winter season of miscarriages and, you know,

57:52

vocational challenges and Cubs mom dying. I

57:55

mean, there was, it was a deep,

57:57

deep winter. Me dealing with burnout for

57:59

music, just a lot. of hard and

58:01

we came out into a certain kind

58:03

of spring. This feels like spring 2.0

58:05

to me. It just feels so much

58:08

more hopeful like I'm dreaming again.

58:10

I think even in that early

58:12

spring before, and we've gone through

58:14

little winters since then in that

58:16

seven years, but I just feel

58:19

like this this feels different. I'm

58:21

dreaming. It's like I'm getting my

58:23

head up. out of the water

58:25

of kind of survival mode. And

58:27

I think a lot of us live

58:29

in survival mode if we're honest. Like

58:31

we're just trying to navigate the blows

58:33

of life and keep our head above

58:35

water. And that's been a lot of

58:37

my life, honestly. You also, I mean, I

58:40

want people to hear. Without details.

58:42

I just want to say you've also done a

58:44

lot of work. I have you are you are

58:46

like having conversations going to counseling a

58:48

lot of counseling You're also ushering in

58:51

spring and your heads coming above water

58:53

because you've put like buoys on your

58:55

arms and you're thinking your legs I

58:57

mean, you know that you know about

58:59

me. Yeah, I think I mean am I wrong?

59:02

Do you think that's right? I mean, I just

59:04

feel like I want to honor the work you're

59:06

putting in of you're letting God do

59:08

God's part but you are have your

59:10

head above water too. Thank you.

59:12

I have great mentors, I am

59:14

seeking counsel actively, I'm in counsel,

59:17

I have healing prayer partners, I

59:19

mean a prayer team, I really am

59:21

surrounded by just gold when it comes

59:23

to people, including you, just friends that

59:25

really champion me and my heart and

59:28

are encouraging. So the dreaming again is

59:30

the sum of those parts, it's a

59:32

lot, but honestly it's the grace of

59:35

God too, because I just, I look

59:37

back and I go Lord. You've been

59:39

so kind of above and beyond generous

59:42

to me and I know I know I'm not

59:44

Like you don't deserve this kind of

59:46

stuff. Yeah, that's right Kobe would you

59:48

say spring as well? What would you

59:50

say for seasonal for the family? I

59:52

would agree. Yeah, I mean, it's just a

59:55

very sweet season and I think kind of

59:57

a beauty of this spring that Beck alluded

59:59

a little while ago is kind of

1:00:01

the fruition of what we felt the

1:00:04

first kind of transition in the spring.

1:00:06

And I think that was the beauty

1:00:08

of that coming out of winter into

1:00:10

the spring season was it was that

1:00:12

it was not based on anything tangible. I

1:00:14

think we can often look to the tangible

1:00:16

thing that's going to bring us out of

1:00:19

the winter season, bring us out of the

1:00:21

hard thing. It's you know. the job or

1:00:23

the girlfriend or the, you know, whatever it

1:00:25

might be, we're looking to the thing to

1:00:28

bring us out of this hard place. God

1:00:30

didn't drop a job in my lap. He

1:00:32

didn't do anything. He didn't, I mean, she

1:00:34

didn't fall pregnant and suddenly, oh, now we're

1:00:36

in the spring. It was no. He did

1:00:38

it from the inside out. I mean,

1:00:40

it was really a dawning of spring

1:00:42

in her heart because he started speaking

1:00:44

again. We felt his presence. inspiration and

1:00:47

vision and that was the dawning of

1:00:49

spring and shortly there after that then

1:00:51

we got the tangible you know proof

1:00:53

of that spring that she did fall

1:00:55

pregnant shortly after that. But so much

1:00:57

of what was promised in that kind

1:00:59

of transition of this dawning spring we're

1:01:01

starting to see the fruition of now

1:01:03

in this spring and just the the

1:01:05

beauty of being able to step into

1:01:07

projects together and you know new film

1:01:09

and TV projects and all the stuff it's

1:01:11

just there was it was kind of like

1:01:13

this this very, I mean, and there's been

1:01:15

ups and downs in the midst of

1:01:17

it, but just feeling like we're stepping

1:01:20

into fruition is really kind of the

1:01:22

beauty of this season. Yeah. You were

1:01:24

very quietly a huge part of unsung

1:01:26

hero, Covey, which I think is very cool.

1:01:28

They're like, I mean, your name is places,

1:01:30

but for non-movie people, we don't know

1:01:33

when we see your name and all

1:01:35

those places, what an important role you

1:01:37

had, but I love that that it

1:01:39

was the small bone family. movie about,

1:01:41

do you know my hot take that

1:01:43

there, that Rebecca St. James is an

1:01:45

unsung hero in that movie? I wish

1:01:47

more people sent it out loud. I'm

1:01:49

like yes, the mom, yes, yes, yes.

1:01:51

I would like to say some of

1:01:53

us clean toilets and some of us

1:01:55

sang on stages and unsung hero as

1:01:57

well. But I just think that's cool.

1:02:00

that you've got to be a part

1:02:02

of that too. Yeah, that's a big part

1:02:04

of it. So special. Okay, I'd like

1:02:06

to finish with a question. You

1:02:08

both talk about. and in the

1:02:10

book talk about true love weights.

1:02:12

And what an important part and

1:02:15

really a forming part of your

1:02:17

teenage life that was. And for

1:02:19

me too, for a lot of

1:02:21

us listening, there are a lot

1:02:23

of different feelings coming as we're

1:02:25

in our 40s, right, about the

1:02:27

impact of what was, I genuinely

1:02:29

believe was a heart to help

1:02:31

us stay pure. came out in

1:02:33

a bunch of sideways ways the

1:02:35

older we got and some very

1:02:37

lovely ways that God has used

1:02:39

to protect us. Yeah. Will you

1:02:42

talk a little bit about why you

1:02:44

wrote about it in the book? Why

1:02:46

and your your relationship now I'd love

1:02:48

for you both to that but I'll

1:02:50

start with you back of like what's

1:02:52

your relationship now with that

1:02:55

idea and that history that's tied so

1:02:57

closely to you and in ways you

1:02:59

probably love and don't love your the

1:03:01

face of that for some people for

1:03:04

some people. And so will you talk

1:03:06

a little about your relationship with and

1:03:08

what your growth has been like what's

1:03:10

got done in you around that? Thank

1:03:12

you for asking about it. I think when

1:03:15

we when we talk about this and we

1:03:17

do say this in the book I think

1:03:19

we have compassion for people that experienced

1:03:22

a very legalistic form of the

1:03:24

true love weights movement and and

1:03:26

feel that they were harmed by

1:03:29

it. I think there's a sense

1:03:31

of compassion and sadness around that.

1:03:33

So there's there's empathy for those

1:03:35

that had wounding from that era. For

1:03:37

me, for us and we can only

1:03:39

speak for our own experience. Like we

1:03:41

can only just say what what we

1:03:43

experience, but for us it was Great,

1:03:45

like there was gold in it, there

1:03:48

was good in it. It encouraged me

1:03:50

to live out something that I was

1:03:52

already committed to. You know, seeing hundreds

1:03:54

of thousands of other young people saying,

1:03:56

God, we want to honor you. We

1:03:58

want to live in holiness. like the

1:04:00

Bible talks about, that was beautiful. Yeah.

1:04:02

Having a purity wing was beautiful. It

1:04:05

did help me put, it did help

1:04:07

put boundaries around dating and I was

1:04:09

dating. I was not one of the

1:04:11

people that was like, I'm not gonna

1:04:14

kiss till I'm married or I'm not

1:04:16

gonna date. I dated, but I was

1:04:18

pretty intentional about it. So I think

1:04:20

for me it was good and I

1:04:23

always when I spoke about like purity

1:04:25

around the world. and I did, you

1:04:27

know, even in cultures that, you know,

1:04:29

I feel like at that time America

1:04:31

was pretty sympathetic to it. Yeah. Other

1:04:33

cultures in Europe, not so much, but

1:04:35

I still would speak about it there,

1:04:37

but I would. I would generally try

1:04:39

to just say, look, there's forgiveness, there's

1:04:41

grace, we all mess up, we all

1:04:43

need the grace of God, like, we

1:04:45

all have to have it. So it's

1:04:47

not this better than you, it's not

1:04:49

this shame on you. I mean, our

1:04:51

pastor says, the gospel is shame off

1:04:53

you, not shame on you. And that,

1:04:55

I think, when you look at the

1:04:57

purity movement through that lens, it's a

1:05:00

whole different thing. But for us, it

1:05:02

was good. What would you say

1:05:04

to that? I would agree. Yeah, I

1:05:06

mean it was definitely good. I think

1:05:08

it was The movement resonated

1:05:11

with decisions. We had

1:05:13

already made yeah and and

1:05:15

decisions that we valued and

1:05:17

and I think The core of

1:05:19

the movement was based on a

1:05:21

very beautiful intention to uphold this

1:05:24

standard that got us set out

1:05:26

for us for our good. I

1:05:28

mean, it's a holiness in every area.

1:05:30

It's not just this area. He calls

1:05:32

us to holiness in every area. That's

1:05:35

a holiness in every area. He calls

1:05:37

us to holiness in every area. That's

1:05:39

a biblical idea. And I think that's

1:05:41

where it gets a little tricky, because

1:05:44

holiness in this area is so tied.

1:05:46

murder, I don't think anybody be arguing

1:05:48

that, yeah, that's not. Your love doesn't

1:05:51

kill. It doesn't kill. But because it's

1:05:53

tied to sex, it just becomes very

1:05:55

emotional and it's tied to so many

1:05:58

other things and it can get. very

1:06:00

painful when it's implied

1:06:02

improperly and I think that's

1:06:04

that's kind of been my encouragement

1:06:07

even as we've you know spoken

1:06:09

to a lot of the hard places of

1:06:11

our lives I think there there's

1:06:13

always a natural intention to want to

1:06:15

blame God for our hurt and I

1:06:18

think my my take away from me

1:06:20

even looking back on my own life

1:06:22

is I think it's it's wise for

1:06:24

us to not blame God for man's

1:06:27

shortcomings. And I think there was a

1:06:29

lot of people that were hurt in

1:06:31

that moment, but it wasn't God. It

1:06:33

wasn't God trying to withhold something

1:06:35

from you. He's no, he placed

1:06:38

this standard for our benefit, for

1:06:40

the benefit of a strong marriage,

1:06:42

for the benefit of great relationships.

1:06:45

And unfortunately, man, I mean, the

1:06:47

church is a beautiful thing, but it's

1:06:49

run by imperfect people. And perfect

1:06:51

people apply things imperfectly. apply things imperfectly

1:06:53

and I think because of the

1:06:55

imperfect application of something that was beautiful

1:06:58

there was there was some fallout

1:07:00

and there was some hurt and and

1:07:02

we empathize with that and we're you

1:07:04

know that breaks our heart that

1:07:06

people were hurt by something that was

1:07:09

beautifully intended but to try to

1:07:11

draw that delineation to not blame God

1:07:13

for man shortcomings is kind

1:07:15

of my encouragement. And stemming off of

1:07:17

that I think probably my last thought

1:07:20

would be we encourage parents especially

1:07:22

to wrestle through this. Yeah, because you

1:07:24

are raising... Because it affects the

1:07:26

next generation. And so if we

1:07:28

go, oh, purity doesn't matter, you

1:07:31

know, holiness in that area doesn't

1:07:33

matter, you know. That affects our

1:07:35

kids like we got to think through

1:07:37

what do we want for our kids

1:07:39

and we have three children And we

1:07:42

are actively speaking to them about the

1:07:44

importance of honoring God in every area

1:07:46

including this one and it's not about

1:07:48

legalism Actually, it's about their freedom. It's

1:07:50

about living their best life Yes, and

1:07:52

that God can free up their sexuality.

1:07:55

I mean, I mean, it is verified

1:07:57

with research that Christians have better sex

1:07:59

So it's like boundaries that God gives

1:08:01

us around this is not hurting

1:08:03

Christians with sex. It's actually helping

1:08:05

us. So married Christians. Married Christians.

1:08:08

Yes, sorry, I thought that was

1:08:10

implied, but yes, let me explicitly

1:08:12

say that Christian, married Christians are

1:08:14

having better sex. But yeah, speaking

1:08:16

to our kids freely about that

1:08:18

and the joy of it and

1:08:20

the beauty of it, and it's

1:08:22

not about shame. It's about God

1:08:24

having a perfect and better way.

1:08:26

I think it's a, I joke

1:08:29

sometimes that God listens to 15

1:08:31

year old Annie's prayers and agreements

1:08:33

versus 44. I'm like, I didn't

1:08:35

mean it. If I didn't know

1:08:37

it was going to go like

1:08:39

this, I'm not sure. And the

1:08:42

Lord's like, nah, she was right.

1:08:44

She was the commitment she made

1:08:46

is the one and the

1:08:48

decisions I made about Jesus as

1:08:50

a kid. God still holds me too

1:08:52

when I get and goes like, no,

1:08:54

that was purer. much lately because I

1:08:57

grew up like y'all too where this

1:08:59

was a part of my like youth group

1:09:01

understanding and to this day I will

1:09:03

tell you Like you said, Kabi, none

1:09:05

of the adults that I experienced

1:09:07

were trying to give us bad

1:09:09

theology. They were doing the best they could

1:09:12

coming out of their own stories and

1:09:14

leading the next generation. So more,

1:09:16

it's like you said, Beck, it is

1:09:18

my concern of how we lead the

1:09:21

next generation. And then saying, like, okay,

1:09:23

what is the good I can pull

1:09:25

from that? And God's protection is better

1:09:27

than any experience that I've...

1:09:30

haven't had. And so I

1:09:32

just think, man, there's ways that

1:09:34

God has stepped in. There

1:09:36

was a recent step in of

1:09:38

the Lord where he stopped me.

1:09:40

And I, I, the level of

1:09:43

protection, I just went

1:09:45

like, oh, I didn't know what

1:09:47

I was getting myself into,

1:09:49

the Lord did, and he just

1:09:51

protected me. Wow. And so over

1:09:54

and over, I sense. the reminder

1:09:56

for our generation, particularly when it

1:09:58

comes to sex. true love weights and

1:10:00

what we grew up with is like can you

1:10:02

find his protection in the midst of the parts

1:10:05

that now there are people had different experiences

1:10:07

with adults than we did and you're

1:10:09

right yes people who had more legalistic

1:10:11

experiences than I did but God's protection

1:10:13

is one of his best qualities absolutely

1:10:15

it feels like so thank y'all for

1:10:17

talking about that I just thought I

1:10:19

feel like so many of us are

1:10:21

thinking about that as we're raising the next generation

1:10:23

and there can be a sense of confusion too like

1:10:25

what what what what what What was that and how

1:10:27

do I reflect on that? But it's important to press

1:10:30

into it, I think. Thanks for bringing it up. Yeah,

1:10:32

of course. Okay, is there anything we didn't talk about?

1:10:34

You want to make sure we talk about? I'm going

1:10:36

to ask you what sounds fun to you. I hope

1:10:38

you're prepared. But are there any, is there anything we

1:10:40

left out the honor make sure we say? I hope

1:10:43

you're prepared. But are there any, is there anything we left

1:10:45

out the honor make sure we say? I want to you, I want

1:10:47

to you, I want to you, I want to you, I want to

1:10:49

you, I want to you, I want to you, I want to you,

1:10:51

I want to you, I want to you, I

1:10:53

want to you, I want to you, I

1:10:55

want to you, I want to you, is,

1:10:57

is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is,

1:10:59

is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is,

1:11:01

is, is, is, You know what sounds fun

1:11:03

to me right now in winter is tropical

1:11:05

waters that are warm that I can just

1:11:07

swim in you know this this Ozzy girl

1:11:09

is still alive and well and she longs

1:11:12

for that so hoping hoping to head south

1:11:14

in get some of that sometime soon.

1:11:16

I follow a girl from Austria, no

1:11:18

I think she's from New Zealand, from

1:11:20

below deck the show on Bravo. She's

1:11:23

a stew, Chief stew, her name's Asia.

1:11:25

And she's so all of her post

1:11:27

right now are at the beach, I'm

1:11:30

like, oh Asia, you're living right. I

1:11:32

bet it feels great. Yeah. Okay, Covey

1:11:34

Think, because the show is called, that

1:11:37

sounds fun. Tell me what sounds

1:11:39

fun to you. I mean, that's kind

1:11:41

of easy. Anything involving a

1:11:43

motor and wheels? Okay. Preferably two

1:11:45

wheels? Really? Are you a motorcycle

1:11:47

guy? Oh yeah. I love. Okay. And our

1:11:49

four-year-old. Oh my goodness. Is Covey's

1:11:51

a little mini me? No. He's

1:11:54

a man after my own heart. He's

1:11:56

obsessed. He's obsessed. Do you have a

1:11:58

little side car for him yet? I mean,

1:12:00

I just put him on the front.

1:12:02

We've got a little mini bike that

1:12:04

I'd ride him around on and

1:12:06

he probably won't listen to this,

1:12:09

but we did buy him a little

1:12:11

dirt bike for Christmas that that got

1:12:13

a little apprehensive about. So we're

1:12:15

going to hold it for a couple

1:12:18

of months. We're going to hold it

1:12:20

for a couple of months. We're

1:12:22

trying to launch a book. We don't

1:12:24

need the enemy to have any opportunity.

1:12:26

No, no, no. Okay, so do you

1:12:29

have a collection. Yeah, I mean it's

1:12:31

tamed me a little bit. He's

1:12:33

got stories for days on pre-married

1:12:35

and kids, uh-huh, uh-huh, versus now.

1:12:38

Oh, right. Yeah, like in the

1:12:40

book you won't put your legs

1:12:42

over a wall when you are

1:12:44

taking a picture, because you're like,

1:12:47

I can't do that as a

1:12:49

dad. I can't risk falling

1:12:51

off this building. I mean, so

1:12:53

12 stories up. Yeah. I still enjoy. I

1:12:56

mean, I- It's still living his best life.

1:12:58

Yeah. Yeah. And you'll live kind of out, y'all

1:13:00

aren't like in the center of the city.

1:13:02

So it gives you a little more space? Yeah.

1:13:04

Oh, yeah. Which is nice. Like, do you take

1:13:06

the motorcycle every day somewhere? Is it like

1:13:08

your main vehicle? Oh no. The riding

1:13:11

on the road is pretty much ceased

1:13:13

since shortly after we got married. So

1:13:15

the fun. Because I was like, I

1:13:18

really want you alive. Yeah, yeah. I

1:13:20

want you to stay alive. So it's

1:13:22

just dirt biking. Oh, and in the

1:13:24

desert, I'm totally cool with the desert.

1:13:26

You know, you go out in the

1:13:28

desert. You go out there in nature.

1:13:30

On the roads in the desert? No,

1:13:32

no, no, no. On the actual dirt.

1:13:34

Yeah, dirt sand. But the road... So

1:13:36

next up you're in Arizona. Right, right.

1:13:38

Well, and when we lived in California,

1:13:40

you know, he could do that, he

1:13:42

could do that quite a lot. That's

1:13:45

right, that's right. But it's the other

1:13:47

drivers that I trust his driving ability,

1:13:49

I just don't trust the people around

1:13:51

him. I mean, just so much of

1:13:53

your skin is exposed to the world.

1:13:55

100%? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyone that

1:13:57

tells me they're buying a motorcycle I

1:13:59

try. to discourage them. I do. I

1:14:01

mean especially road riding. I mean it's...

1:14:04

I do. I do. It's one of the more dangerous

1:14:06

things you can do, especially on

1:14:08

the road. But growing up, riding

1:14:10

dirt bikes, the skills I learned

1:14:12

in the dirt have saved my

1:14:14

life multiple times on the road.

1:14:16

Oh wow. A lot of guys

1:14:18

just jump on a street bike

1:14:20

and end up getting hurt, which

1:14:22

is... True Love Dirt Bikes. I'm

1:14:24

really born today. It does not

1:14:26

ride on the road. True Love

1:14:28

Dirt Bikes. That's right. Thank you.

1:14:30

You're so grateful. We're so grateful

1:14:32

for you. Kindred spirit. Oh you

1:14:35

guys, aren't they the best? I love

1:14:37

them so much. I'm so grateful for

1:14:39

like the deep dive they were willing

1:14:41

to do on this conversation. And yeah,

1:14:43

I just really respect them. both. I

1:14:46

love them both. So make sure you

1:14:48

grab your copy of lasting ever wherever

1:14:50

you love to buy books and go

1:14:52

follow coming and back on social media

1:14:55

to them. Thank you for being on

1:14:57

the show. If you enjoyed this episode,

1:14:59

you can go back and listen to

1:15:01

374. The first time Beck was on

1:15:03

the podcast or 878 with her brothers,

1:15:06

Joel and Luke freaking and country. If

1:15:08

you have any questions from this episode,

1:15:10

make sure you drop them in the

1:15:12

Q&A box on your Spotify. we will

1:15:15

answer them for you there. If you

1:15:17

need anything else for me, you know

1:15:19

I'm embarrassingly easy to find. Any F

1:15:21

downs on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, all the

1:15:23

places you may need me. That is

1:15:26

how you can find me. Oh, and

1:15:28

Tiktok, too. Oh, yeah. And New York.

1:15:30

I think that's it for me today

1:15:32

friends. Go out or stay home. Do

1:15:34

something that sounds fun to you

1:15:37

and I will do the same.

1:15:39

Today what sounds fun to me

1:15:41

as the weather is warming up

1:15:44

is getting outside. I'm gonna get

1:15:46

outside today. I hope you do

1:15:48

the same. Y'all have a

1:15:50

great week. We'll actually see

1:15:52

you back here on Thursday

1:15:55

for another episode of Always

1:15:57

Annie. We'll see y'all then.

1:15:59

And he down in your car

1:16:01

to your home.