0:02

Imagine, if you will,

0:04

that you are in

0:06

a place of great

0:08

beauty. Some teenage boys

0:11

walk past you, they

0:13

yell out, Hey, bitch

0:15

tits. The world, you

0:17

see, is a place

0:19

of paradox, of beauty

0:21

and cruelty. It will

0:24

cut you off at

0:26

the knees, then gift

0:28

you a bear of

0:30

easies. And

0:33

that

0:36

my

0:38

friends

0:40

is

0:42

why

0:44

you always, always,

0:47

need a buck

0:50

up. Oh! The

0:53

people need to

0:56

see. You know

0:59

why? I'm in

1:02

such high spirits.

1:05

Sasha French and I. Say

1:07

hello, Sasha French. Hello. Change my

1:09

mind. Oh. We went and had

1:12

a cold plunge. This is,

1:14

let's tell the Buckheads, hello, Kate

1:16

Lambroke. This is an AM record.

1:18

Yes, it's unusual. It's so early.

1:21

I know that it was really

1:23

hard to drink my kalua. I've

1:26

bombed it twice already. Do

1:28

you know how early today's record

1:30

is? And it's made me think

1:32

of two things I will never do.

1:35

What? You will never have me stepping

1:37

foot in a hot air balloon. What

1:39

on earth are people doing? I

1:41

don't know. I'm looking out to

1:43

the city's scape. Yes, yes. And

1:45

there's hot air balloons. Go home.

1:47

They look beautiful. They look beautiful.

1:50

Stay in bed. There's planes that

1:52

have engines and propellers and all

1:54

sorts of things that work proven

1:56

to work. And also, but they're

1:58

taking you somewhere. you want to

2:00

go. Hopefully paid work most of

2:03

the time. I can tell you

2:05

heaven. Or every second or the

2:07

other one. The other one. My

2:09

people might go there. I mean

2:11

why would your people go there?

2:13

The gaze. Sometimes I think thought

2:15

you meant the half Italian. Sometimes

2:17

I do think if hell exists

2:19

and I do go there for

2:21

being a mow, but that means

2:23

every single gay person has ever

2:25

existed is also there. Not the

2:28

worst time. Yeah, that's great. Not

2:30

the worst time. All right, so

2:32

you know I was raised a

2:34

Jehovah's Witness. Would you be there?

2:36

Very quickly, and please excuse my

2:38

ignorance with this question. Yes. Is

2:40

the heaven and hell thing and

2:42

all that the Jehovah's Winters? So

2:44

they don't really believe in hell

2:46

as in a place of eternal...

2:48

you know, tour chart. Oh, sorry.

2:51

Yeah, well. Mm-hmm. But and they

2:53

believe in a paradise earth. Uh-huh.

2:55

So they only believe that there's

2:57

144,000 people who are going to

2:59

heaven. It's a complicated format. VIP?

3:01

It's a beautiful mind. Could to

3:03

get a stamp. Got to know

3:05

the DJ name. And always very

3:07

controversial. Very red rope. Yes, Vip.

3:09

Not in those shoes? Yes. Anyway.

3:11

How many guys you got? At

3:13

Easter. Do you have any girls

3:16

in your group? Remember that? I

3:18

know, but now girls don't even

3:20

get favours. Really? Yeah. Girls aren't

3:22

getting priority entry into clubs. So

3:24

beautiful and has got like three

3:26

beautiful girlfriends that she goes out

3:28

with. They have to line up.

3:30

Yeah, and often. And I'm so

3:32

shocked by this, they have to

3:34

buy a drink. Sorry? Like what?

3:36

Yeah. Chaos. What's happened? There should

3:39

be someone approaching them on the

3:41

street. Like when I was in

3:43

my 20s and gives them drink

3:45

cards. And says, come in. They've

3:47

made all that illegal. But you

3:49

know what? That's all just going

3:51

to backfire on them. Who made

3:53

that illegal? Well, I've never been

3:55

interested in politics, but I'm getting

3:57

in. Government. Bring back drink cards.

3:59

Yes. For hotties on the street.

4:01

Yes. Why not? That's my slogan.

4:04

What happened to Pretty bodies get

4:06

privilege. As they should. Anyway, when

4:08

I was raised, did you have

4:10

his witness? I remember at the

4:12

sitting in a meeting and I

4:14

was really young, like 11 or

4:16

whatever, and there was someone up

4:18

and giving a talk, so on

4:20

the Sunday, some idiot would give

4:22

an hour, like get his, get

4:24

his target suit and pull it

4:27

on, you know, get up and

4:29

lecture people, right? And... I remember

4:31

they were talking about who would

4:33

inherit the Paradise Earth and I

4:35

remember looking around the Kingdom Hall

4:37

and the other Jehovah's Witnesses. And

4:39

I see to Mom, if these

4:41

are the people that are going

4:43

to get eternal life, I don't

4:45

think I want it. And that

4:47

my folks was the beginning of

4:49

the end. Yes, but I was

4:52

like not even being a smart-ass.

4:54

I get it. I was literally

4:56

like, these are not my people.

4:58

I get it. like to and

5:00

I do think I'm more probably

5:02

I think I'd fit in better

5:04

in hell I reckon this podcast

5:06

with pop pop hard in hell

5:08

the buck up live from hell

5:10

but also not even like proper

5:12

hell like maybe the halfway waiting

5:15

room for hell okay we're not

5:17

really the worst like there's people

5:19

there's worse there's worse than us

5:21

there's what thank you that's the

5:23

nicest thing you've ever said yeah

5:25

that's worse than us but just

5:27

some sort of hell adjacent place

5:29

for people hell light hell light

5:31

it's what you want hell light

5:33

Anyway, hot air ballooning. Hell yeah!

5:35

Hell yeah! Hello to our hot

5:37

air balloon operators. If their bike

5:40

heads. You know what? I will

5:42

put money on it. That someone

5:44

listening to this podcast got proposed

5:46

to on a hot air balloon.

5:48

And I've ruined it for them.

5:50

Well, maybe I haven't. Maybe they're

5:52

not sensitive. I do believe that

5:54

with a hot air balloon. Yeah.

5:56

There's always someone who's really into

5:58

it. loving it and a group

6:00

of people or the one significant

6:03

other who isn't I don't believe

6:05

you're explaining the man and the

6:07

woman just say it's a man

6:09

into it I think certain men

6:11

would be you know it that

6:13

is like going up just the

6:15

flames of it and the gas

6:17

of it and they'd like how

6:19

much gas how much gas does

6:21

this use and they'd offer to

6:23

help the guy with the rope

6:25

when it crashes into the trees

6:28

when it lands on some hospital

6:31

roof. Whereas you know you're right,

6:33

traditionally, I mean this is a

6:35

traditional conversation, the woman's more like

6:37

what's gonna be in the picnic

6:40

basket? Like you know she's I

6:42

think it's got a ring in

6:44

his pocket. Yeah, of course, I

6:46

mean if you're a woman and

6:48

your partner who you're not married

6:51

to, well big if if you're

6:53

a woman. or whatever word I'm

6:55

allowed to use. Oh, these days.

6:57

If your man says to you

7:00

were going on a hot air

7:02

balloon, as if you're not going

7:04

to think anything other than he's

7:06

going to propose. No, that's true.

7:09

And I would go as far

7:11

as to say, if you're a

7:13

woman and you get taken on

7:15

a head, a hot air balloon

7:18

by your boyfriend and he doesn't

7:20

propose. Yes, absolutely. Yeah, grounds for

7:22

breaking up. You're setting your alarm

7:24

for $3.45. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

7:27

yeah, yeah. Rugging up? Yeah, to

7:29

hover over. Meeting in an oval.

7:31

This is the wicker, the wicker

7:33

baskets. Oh, wicker baskets. This is

7:35

the worst wicker. Yeah, no, this

7:38

is no good wicker. And also,

7:40

you know what I don't like

7:42

about it? I don't like that

7:44

they can't tell you where you're

7:47

going to come down. They never

7:49

can. They just say, hold on

7:51

tight and scream and away we

7:53

go. When you come down, when

7:56

you come down, how do you

7:58

get back? I don't, no one

8:00

knows. Do you have to, you

8:02

try, and if you see the...

8:05

footage and even a good landing

8:07

yeah very hard yeah it is

8:09

it's it's got impact that's a

8:11

thud yes like our 70% cocoa

8:14

chat and that hot air balloon

8:16

lands with the thud and also

8:18

you know the other thing that

8:20

I find very unappealing yeah so

8:22

how big's the basket the wickus

8:25

not very big it's not a

8:27

big but also they put you

8:29

in there with all sorts like

8:31

18 of you so it's like

8:34

every one in the world knows

8:36

a lift right a lift right

8:38

is very uncomfortable. That's only like

8:40

three stories. Yeah. But you're actually

8:43

in with total strangers you have

8:45

to make small talk? I know

8:47

someone that went on one and

8:49

said that you can't talk because

8:52

the sound of the flame is

8:54

so loud that you're up in

8:56

the clouds with what? I said

8:58

will you? Oh. conversation I once

9:01

heard that I've never forgotten in

9:03

my life. On a holiday? No.

9:05

But it reminds me of the

9:07

conversation that you'd have to have

9:09

with the strangers that you were

9:12

thrust into the hot air balloon

9:14

with. And it was a husband

9:16

and wife and I was in

9:18

a hotel. I'd had a meeting

9:21

in a hotel. I was an

9:23

escort. And I was coming down.

9:25

And his wife got in. like

9:28

probably deep into their 70s. Total

9:30

silence as they stand there, very

9:32

neatly dressed, you know the neat

9:35

elderly, beautiful. And then she said,

9:37

that green apple was nice. And

9:39

he went, hmm. But that's how

9:41

I answer it. That's where it's

9:43

going. But isn't that the deal?

9:45

I know it is. You've got

9:48

to find the person that you're

9:50

going to be talking about green

9:52

apples with. in 30 years when

9:54

everything hurts. Yes. Everything hurts physically.

9:56

That one trip together. Yeah. So

9:58

I would have thought I've just

10:01

it's just stayed with me. Do

10:03

you know to this day I

10:05

cannot complement fruit to my husband?

10:07

No matter how good it is.

10:09

You can't do it! Be reminded,

10:11

like the other night I sliced

10:14

up a neck to rain and

10:16

because you know he's gone, you

10:18

know, there's something going on with

10:20

him. With the sugar? Yeah, he's

10:22

still off it. Can we just

10:24

say this? What is going on?

10:27

I want to give a shout

10:29

out to the Buckheads, whose partner,

10:31

and I'm kicked off before but

10:33

we're doing it again, when your

10:35

partner goes through a health phase,

10:38

there is nothing worse. your guilt

10:40

ridden you're on the couch you're

10:42

reading like a pig and they're

10:44

not eating this they're off running

10:46

doing this they've bought new shorts

10:48

if you walk into the lounge

10:51

and your partner shows you new

10:53

runners they've got strap in for

10:55

three months of hell I just

10:57

don't like the worst he came

10:59

out the other day and he

11:01

came out of the shower and

11:04

I was walking out of the

11:06

bedroom and I said him oh

11:08

you look really fit and he

11:10

went oh do I thanks And

11:12

I went, when was the last

11:14

time, when was the last time,

11:17

get that shit on the phone?

11:19

He's still, after last week when

11:21

he didn't call us. Didn't, well,

11:23

we've cracked the case that Pete

11:25

doesn't listen to the biker. No,

11:27

he stopped listening at some point,

11:30

he stopped listening. Well, and he's

11:32

too fit. You would think he

11:34

has time to listen to all

11:36

these runs he's going on and

11:38

all this fitness. No, no, he's

11:41

not running, he's a cyclist. Okay.

11:43

So, and he can't listen on

11:45

his bike. Like, no cyclists have

11:47

headphones in. You're not supposed to,

11:49

they do, but it's the most

11:51

dangerous thing you can do. You

11:54

got to hear people yelling at

11:56

you. Yes, you need to know.

11:58

It's the same reason that he

12:00

hates, he wouldn't let me have

12:02

darkest legal tint, on my car

12:04

windows. Oh, on my car windows.

12:07

Not your spray tan. Oh no,

12:09

he's not anti that. Although my

12:11

daughter would be. Okay. Anyway, she,

12:13

he won't let me have it

12:15

because bike riders can't see your

12:17

intent when you're behind the wheel,

12:20

right? So he doesn't have headphones

12:22

in. So that cut out a

12:24

lot of his listening time. It's,

12:26

um, that thing about the Green

12:28

Apple's thrown me because you've gotten

12:30

into my psyche here because I

12:33

also think I have that. I'm

12:35

just realizing, but about running out

12:37

of things to talk about. and

12:39

I feel that's why I never

12:41

stop with him especially if we're

12:44

in public getting a drink before

12:46

something if we go have a

12:48

meal I do not stop talking

12:50

because I don't want another couple

12:52

or someone else to look over

12:54

at us and we're sitting there

12:57

not talking but the couples not

12:59

talking are probably happier than anyone

13:01

I don't think so no I

13:03

don't think so I think there's

13:05

something to be said for again

13:07

there is a comfortable silence But

13:10

if you're out in a beautiful

13:12

restaurant, not in our relation, no.

13:14

But I feel the same pressure.

13:16

Like if Peter and I are

13:18

out to dinner together. I mean

13:20

it's not, yeah. You're a podcaster,

13:23

you're a broadcaster, if you can

13:25

shut to Dutton, you can shut

13:27

to your husband. Yeah, I've got

13:29

to keep up the gibba jabber.

13:31

And sometimes I have to listen

13:33

to things that Eddie's interested in.

13:36

Your kids. Oh, you know what

13:38

he's gone into at the moment.

13:40

I can speak about him with

13:42

total impunity now because we know

13:44

he doesn't listen. Welcome to Live

13:47

World War! Yes! It's actually great!

13:49

When your husband's... When the dabbler!

13:51

But, but, but, but, but, but,

13:53

but, this could become therapy. Anyway,

13:55

he's now gone on a deep

13:57

dive. Not World War II. No,

14:00

he's always in that. Yeah, we've

14:02

spoken about that. Yeah, it's a

14:04

go-to. Yeah, and sometimes that's, there

14:06

are bits of that that are

14:08

not... Bad that he can share

14:10

with you. So like oh really

14:13

for those of you listening Kate

14:15

Lanbrook just said sentence there is

14:17

bits of World War II that

14:19

weren't bad. So we'd love to

14:21

know some examples but now's not

14:23

the time. So let's carry on.

14:26

Interesting. Sure. But now he's gone

14:28

on a deep dive on the

14:30

Beatles. Oh my... Nothing after World

14:32

War II. Straight men of a

14:34

certain age love the Beatles. He's

14:36

always loved the Beatles and he

14:39

always played the guitar. Yep. And

14:41

he's always sung a song and

14:43

I remember thinking, I don't think

14:45

this is a very good song.

14:47

How's his voice? Lovely. He's got

14:50

a really sweet sort of slightly

14:52

off. And when we say DeepW

14:54

doing documentaries, listen to the music,

14:56

it's your guy, it's your guy,

14:58

it's your guy, it's your guy,

15:00

no, that one who made the

15:03

Hobbit, oh yes, the big Peter

15:05

Jackson documentary, oh yeah, the eight

15:07

hour documentary, the eight hour documentary,

15:09

exactly that he keeps trying to

15:11

suggest that we watch together. But

15:13

now it's led because there's so

15:16

many arterial deviations, so now he's

15:18

gone down, he's got, the only

15:20

thing I'm interested in interested in

15:22

a... about the Beatles. And I

15:24

don't want to be disrespectful. I

15:26

actually think they're amazing. I went

15:29

to see Paul McCartney in concert

15:31

against my will. He's still going.

15:33

Six years ago and he was

15:35

amazing. He's still going. And he

15:37

was amazing. I felt like I

15:39

should apologize to him. But I

15:42

would have had to explain what

15:44

I was apologizing for. Anyway, so,

15:46

but he is like so immersed

15:48

in the midst of playing the

15:50

guitar again. He's singing Beatles songs.

15:53

It's just not fun. It's not

15:55

me. Well, it doesn't have to

15:57

be you. You are allowed to

15:59

have... We've got to have things

16:01

we share. And he's so immersed

16:03

in it. The only aspect of

16:06

the Beatles that I'm interested in?

16:08

Yoko. Yoko. Yes. Why hasn't there

16:10

been some amazing drama movie or

16:12

series TV series? I don't know.

16:14

We did manage to have one

16:16

conversation where he was relaying some

16:19

song that John had written or

16:21

whatever and I said he was

16:23

reading the lyrics and the lyrics

16:25

were so scrambled. I said to

16:27

him, that stinks of Yoko. And

16:29

guess what? He then read on

16:32

and it was Yoko. She's still

16:34

alive? Yeah, she's still alive. Still

16:36

an artist? I think she's, maybe

16:38

she's a bit frat, but anyway,

16:40

how amazing. I'm totally interested in

16:42

Yoko Ono. I'd go see a

16:45

film about Yoko Ono. Love Art.

16:47

And her relationship with the Beatles.

16:49

Just not there. We need the

16:51

Yoko OG story. I really want

16:53

to. How Disney keep making them

16:56

about all the villains we need

16:58

one about? Yoko well, I don't

17:00

think they could cast her as

17:02

if was she a villain. Oh,

17:04

this is a question for your

17:06

husband Bring this up next time

17:09

you go out for dinner But

17:11

it just made me laugh because

17:13

I whenever someone tells you that

17:15

their partners going through a phase

17:17

They never say it positively. Have

17:19

you noticed no one ever goes.

17:22

Oh, yeah, he's oh, it's so

17:24

bad. He's getting after himself. It's

17:26

and he's getting fit One exception.

17:28

He's eating well. When they start

17:30

cooking. Then pepper rice, like my

17:32

girlfriend, Alice, her husband Jars, started

17:35

a baking phase and we're so

17:37

thrilled with it. Yum. Baggets, bagels.

17:39

Doesn't sound healthy. No, not healthy.

17:41

But that's a good phase when

17:43

your husband's cooking. Oh, absolutely. But

17:45

otherwise, no. Cody said a sentence

17:48

to me the other day and

17:50

God I laughed because I think

17:52

he's right. We've been married for

17:54

two years and we have been

17:56

together. Is that all? Only two

17:59

years? We've been together at 10.

18:01

So that's all muddled into one.

18:03

So we're going to for maybe

18:05

11 years, whatever. seen you run?

18:07

I've never seen me run. What's

18:09

your point? What made you think?

18:12

I don't know. I've never seen

18:14

you run and he was really

18:16

in thought I could see him

18:18

trying to figure out if he's

18:20

actually ever seen me run and

18:22

I don't think he has. Okay

18:25

I'm going to run a statistic

18:27

by you I read the other

18:29

day. 90% of adults over 30

18:31

will never run again. How's that?

18:33

But I run out of... 90%

18:35

It's always out of... That's a

18:38

incredible number. That's a very high

18:40

number. That seems too. Do you

18:42

mean go for a run as

18:44

runners-on? I didn't go down to

18:46

the track. No, I think it's

18:48

like, we'll never run. But I'll

18:51

run for something because I'm often

18:53

running a bit late or... Yes,

18:55

you're capable of it, but you're

18:57

not the normal runner. person but

18:59

will never run again. You're not

19:01

the normal person. Do you call

19:04

if that's us? You're not the

19:06

normal person? Just call me a...

19:08

No, no, because Chinese have me

19:10

runs! But I do have a

19:12

theory. Yes. So I've got a

19:15

theory about runners. Okay. Oh, we

19:17

love a theory. Oh! Okay. My

19:19

theory is runners are either running

19:21

away from something. or running towards

19:23

something. There's two types of runners.

19:25

What do you think? So they're

19:28

either running towards fitness, their goal

19:30

oriented, their whatever. Or they're running

19:32

from the past. They're haunted. My

19:34

God. Yes. Maybe. They try to

19:36

escape demons. I like this. What

19:38

do you think? Cody specifically, I

19:41

know what it is. It's Queenslanders.

19:43

are quite fit. He grew up

19:45

on the water, his family are

19:47

all fit, they all surf, they

19:49

all swim, that's like this, that,

19:51

swimming, we got to state championships,

19:54

they always say state championships, shut

19:56

it. You know those families? I

19:58

want to write that down for

20:00

stand-up. State championships. No one even

20:02

knows what that needs. Who's going

20:04

to fact check that? Yes. Everyone's

20:07

always state champion in something. Someone

20:09

told me the other day, who

20:11

was it that was state... I'm

20:13

Shakespeare champion. I'm like, is that

20:15

what? I think you've made that

20:18

up. That's not a thing. You

20:20

mean, what is it? The most

20:22

bullied person in the world. What?

20:24

And then you go to the

20:26

nationals. Do you? Yeah, maybe. To

20:28

represent Australia, where? Doing Shakespeare. At

20:31

the Royal Shakespeare Company. Maybe, maybe

20:33

we're. But. So very fit family

20:35

and then he comes to Melbourne

20:37

in his 20s, dark, grey, many

20:39

months of the year, winter, bleak,

20:41

bleak, he just has to do

20:44

something with that coastal energy. Just

20:46

threw that in. Give me the

20:48

cooker. What did you throw in?

20:50

Nothing, don't worry about it. You

20:52

wouldn't like it. So I feel

20:54

like he's getting rid of some

20:57

coastal energy. Oh so he's running

20:59

away. I would have thought he's

21:01

running towards fitness. Yes, but I'm

21:03

saying I think the energy is

21:05

just, it gets exerted up there

21:07

quite naturally. What exercise do you

21:10

do? I've asked you before. Well

21:12

to be fair, the dog. We

21:14

go hard, but we go hard.

21:16

We go hard. We go hard.

21:18

Me and the dog go hard.

21:21

Go hard. Do you know how

21:23

hard it is to get that

21:25

ball in my mouth? She throws

21:27

it. You don't go hard with

21:29

Darby who's been carried around by

21:31

the butler. What a, I don't

21:34

know, look, anyway, you look great.

21:36

No, my raging anxiety disorder does

21:38

a lot, burns a lot of

21:40

calories. Keeps me thin. Okay, you

21:42

know how I was telling you?

21:44

Overthinking keeps me thin. You know

21:47

how I was telling you about

21:49

Alice and Jazz and being a

21:51

baker. I've got to tell you

21:53

the most terrible thing that's happened

21:55

to Alice, yet we'll give us

21:57

all a buck up. How does

22:00

it work on this show? Money

22:02

back guarantee. If I said hello,

22:04

okay. in the course of a

22:06

friendship. It's very important to allow

22:08

your friends to evolve. I don't

22:10

think we did. The world's greatest

22:13

producer. Sorry we were too fired

22:15

up about the hot air balloons.

22:17

It's very important to allow your

22:19

friends to evolve and to take

22:21

on new. And to grow. Yes.

22:23

Grow with them. Yes, that's right.

22:26

And I know that some friends

22:28

are very resistant to their friends

22:30

changing. So when my girlfriend Alice,

22:32

who I love, she's Sunday's godmother,

22:34

that's who I went to Vietnam

22:36

with, well like we love each

22:38

other. She really tested our friendship.

22:41

Did she get fit? Last year

22:43

or early this year. When she

22:45

told me and she didn't headline

22:47

this she told me this after

22:49

the fact That she had taken

22:51

up pickleball I am convinced it's

22:53

not real and it's a scam.

22:56

I don't understand it Is there

22:58

a bracket? Is there a ball?

23:00

Is there a court? It's some

23:02

small court. It sounds like a

23:04

Ben Stiller comedy from the 90s.

23:06

It just is. And when Sasha

23:08

and I first heard about it,

23:11

it made its laugh. Is there?

23:13

I think there might be. Oh,

23:15

what? Hang on. Let me look.

23:17

What's a cool pickle. What's it

23:19

called? I don't know. It's a

23:21

great name. I don't know. Do

23:23

you think it's great? a pickle.

23:26

No, well, it's kind of funny.

23:28

When Sasha and I first heard

23:30

about it, we went, let's play

23:32

pickleball. But then it became a

23:34

thing. We never played it, of

23:36

course. Hang on, did I hear?

23:38

Is it someone, it's like half

23:41

a tennis court? Yes, it's half

23:43

or something. I don't know what

23:45

they do. I think they've got

23:47

a paddle or a racket. There

23:49

is a movie called pickle. is

23:51

good. Thank you. All right now

23:54

let stay with me here. Oh

23:56

I'm with you. So she just

23:58

kind of said something something at

24:00

my pickleball. Dodgeball's the movie by

24:02

the way. Is that about pickleball?

24:04

No, that's about dodgeball. I don't

24:06

know what that is either. I'm

24:09

like a bank in Switzerland. Two

24:11

percent interest. Not even. Anyway, but

24:13

Alice threw it into conversation. the

24:15

way you do when there's something

24:17

you're ashamed of, but you want

24:19

to test how it's going to

24:21

go down. I think this, because

24:24

she said, oh, something, something, my

24:26

pickleball on Saturday morning, I said,

24:28

what? Yeah, you know how you

24:30

act like, yeah, we've discussed it,

24:32

like saying to your mom when

24:34

you want to go out when

24:36

you're in grade 11. I already

24:39

told you I'm going out, you

24:41

just don't listen, she did that.

24:43

So she told me more, I

24:45

went, I just told me more,

24:47

I wanted to do something, I

24:49

wanted to do something, I get

24:51

me fit and she's not into

24:54

fitness so oh I like that

24:56

you know she and she also

24:58

she's stunning and she's one of

25:00

those people who's always naturally just

25:02

stayed in shape and stunning oh

25:04

she's got a perfect like jalo

25:06

shape so she's very thin and

25:09

tiny waist anyway great so she

25:11

mentions that to me I asked

25:13

some questions I'm like this is

25:15

weird it turns out she's going

25:17

out with one of her she's

25:19

going to what with one of

25:21

her girlfriends who she grew up

25:24

with who spends a lot of

25:26

time at bunnings. That makes sense,

25:28

right? I'm not going to pickleball

25:30

with you. Bunningsport. But she hasn't

25:32

really mentioned it. We haven't really

25:34

discussed it again and then I

25:36

get a message from not her

25:39

but Jazz the other day and

25:41

it's a photo of Alice playing

25:43

pickleball in hospital. I

25:48

didn't clap and I shouldn't

25:50

laugh because it was terrible

25:52

what's happened to her. A

25:54

pickleball injury. A pickleball injury.

25:56

So let me just say

25:58

this. Say it. Okay. An

26:01

expression you never want used

26:03

in relation to any part

26:05

of your body? Uh-oh. The

26:07

word shattered. Oh. Her little

26:09

finger on her left hand

26:11

and her ring finger. Shattered.

26:13

Shattered. She had to have

26:15

surgery from... Yeah, pickle ball.

26:17

What hit it? She sent

26:19

me photos of her hand.

26:21

Her hand was blackened and

26:23

blued. So what happened was

26:25

she said she was going

26:27

for the ball. The pickle

26:29

ball. The pickle ball. Is

26:31

that two balls? One's a

26:33

ball and one's the pickle

26:35

ball. Just don't know anything

26:38

about it. Do I? And

26:40

do you know what? You

26:42

don't want to? I don't

26:44

want to. Okay. She said

26:46

she was going for the

26:48

ball. And she had... gained

26:50

quite a lot of momentum

26:52

and she was lunging for

26:54

the ball and she said

26:56

she waited for herself to

26:58

stop. Right. And she didn't

27:00

stop and next minute her

27:02

hand went down to the

27:04

ground and her hand stopped

27:06

her. And I said to

27:08

her now this, let this

27:10

be a teachable moment. When

27:13

we were talking about it

27:15

and I called her at

27:17

the hospital and you know,

27:19

we were just talking, we

27:21

actually were laughing. even though

27:23

she was in pain. She

27:25

was probably cooked up on

27:27

the gas. I think she

27:29

was. And I said to

27:31

her, and this sums up

27:33

what a mistake pickleball is.

27:35

I said, well that's the

27:37

end of your six-month pickleball.

27:39

Adventure flirtation. And she said,

27:41

oh no, six weeks. She's

27:43

going back. She only played

27:45

it for six weeks. Six

27:48

weeks. Six weeks. And

27:50

she ended up shattered. I just

27:52

gurgled pickleball. I don't want to

27:54

be friends with that guy. Why

27:56

is he squatting like that? A

27:58

puddle! A puddle! It's a puddle.

28:00

Anyway, just let it... Are you

28:02

on a boat? No. Why are

28:04

you holding a paddle? Why are

28:07

you holding a puddle? But tipping

28:09

pongs all right on a weekend

28:11

away? This is a buck up.

28:13

Why are we negating? Why are

28:15

we negating pickleball? Well, because of

28:17

what it did to my girlfriend.

28:19

Yeah, it shutted her finger. And

28:21

also, it really gave us a

28:23

buck up. Wouldn't really realize she'd

28:25

only been doing it for six

28:27

weeks since she'd been done done

28:29

in? Yeah. Yeah. That's a good

28:31

moment. That's a lesson That's you

28:33

know what that is our four

28:35

bears eating the poison berries so

28:37

we don't have to And you

28:39

know we're all about living long

28:41

on this pod, aren't we? Oh,

28:43

you haven't no, but what if

28:45

we find out that the pickleball

28:47

is the secret to a long

28:49

life? Well, we know it isn't.

28:51

It's not the Mediterranean died or

28:53

living in a blue zone None

28:55

of them are. Can you imagine

28:57

an Italian saying I'm playing pickleball?

28:59

I'd say pickleball would be about

29:01

literally pickling the food and the

29:03

jars and the eating and the

29:05

oil and the more food, thank

29:07

you. Your people. Pickleball, we're going

29:09

to get bullied. We're going to

29:11

go online with the pickleball community.

29:13

Has he mentioned making me another

29:15

ragu? Oh no, but we can

29:17

just request. She'll be stoked. I

29:19

mean I don't want to be.

29:21

She takes requests. Because I've complemented

29:23

her ragu a lot. She takes

29:25

requests. She doesn't listen. She doesn't

29:27

have to listen. She doesn't have

29:29

to listen to her pocket. And

29:31

I'm not going to teach her.

29:34

I just don't want to be

29:36

taking food out of the mouths

29:38

of your family. But I don't

29:40

think you treat her with the

29:42

respect she deserves. I actually do.

29:44

You take her food for granted.

29:46

Whereas I don't. We'll invent it.

29:48

We'll do whatever we want. Right?

29:50

You know what happened the other

29:52

day and I was a bit

29:54

emo about this. I'm going to

29:56

call my family out on this.

29:58

Went out to my car and

30:00

the neighbour was packing boxes of

30:02

empty jars. Long big jars. Long

30:04

big jars. Italian husband. And then

30:06

I remembered, Source Day was a

30:08

big event in our childhood, non-as

30:10

backyard there in Brunswick, everyone had

30:12

different jobs, I'd get told off

30:14

of doing it wrong, I wouldn't

30:16

take it seriously, jars and jars,

30:18

we would go home with literal

30:20

crates, all sorts, all sorts that

30:22

would last months. Yes, they had

30:24

stopped. and all of us cousins,

30:26

all of our family, none of

30:28

us have continued with it after

30:30

the passing of our grandparents, we

30:32

didn't continue. That sucks. Okay. I

30:34

can't be bothered organizing. All right,

30:36

so that's all right. So I

30:38

want someone else to do it.

30:40

You know what? You've just summed

30:42

up? You know what? You've just

30:44

summed up? What? The entire world.

30:46

It's so true. The entire world.

30:48

We all want stuff to happen.

30:50

They should do something about... They

30:52

should. Who's they? They is we.

30:54

Can you see me? the tables

30:56

the machines the grinder there's so

30:58

much involved the ingredients the five

31:01

tons of tomatoes I've got to

31:03

get shipped in all right who

31:05

could be bothered you've got to

31:07

do all the special cleaning for

31:09

the jar what you're actually happy

31:11

about that thing that makes the

31:13

jar Close properly your swords. You

31:15

know what you're actually, you know

31:17

what you've established? You're actually so

31:19

happy about Passar today having died

31:21

with your Nona and Nona. I'm

31:23

actually not. You are! You have

31:25

sauce on tap. Sauce on tap

31:27

for many months. But it doesn't

31:29

come from magic. Then a couple

31:31

of years ago, a friend of

31:33

mine did sausage day. With her

31:35

family and they went hard. There

31:37

was all sorts of sausages. There

31:39

was even a bloody vegetarian option.

31:41

That's new for the community. I

31:43

mean, I wasn't doing that. What's

31:45

in a vegetarian sausage? What? Literally

31:47

what could they put in there?

31:49

I'm not sure. I wasn't paying

31:51

attention to that table. But, any

31:53

who, maybe if there is a

31:55

bucket in Melbourne that does sauce

31:57

day, please invite me, I'll come.

31:59

I'd come too. You will come

32:01

along. I dream of it. Would

32:03

all live O be a live

32:05

buck up from past a day?

32:07

Oh, that we'd love, Sash would

32:09

love it. That would be so

32:11

good. What would you do it?

32:13

Well, the buck up was that

32:15

you don't have to get involved

32:17

in, in passata days. I don't

32:19

like that. No, but you say

32:21

it, but your actions indicate that

32:23

you don't that you don't. You

32:25

know how much we love a

32:28

celebrity, a celebrity starting. Oh, yes,

32:30

you're gonna love this The other

32:32

day I met the cafe around

32:34

the corner I'll say you get

32:36

out of the house. Not often.

32:38

Really not often. Where are you

32:40

getting, have you had another Mont

32:42

Blanc? No, but I do get

32:44

the takeaway coffee there of the

32:46

morning, but go to a cafe

32:48

as in go and sit down.

32:50

Yeah, right, me too, never. Hardly

32:52

ever. But because of the writing

32:54

thing that I'm doing at the

32:56

moment, it's kind of good to

32:58

maybe have a different background for

33:00

a couple hours. I mean people

33:02

who listen to this would not

33:04

be aware of this. That you're

33:06

quite talented. quite talented

33:08

so I had to just change the

33:10

background so let's go get to the

33:12

car so I took the solo solo

33:14

did the wanky thing well oh here

33:16

we go laptop in the what a

33:18

wanker I'm so insecure about doing my

33:20

work in public that even when if

33:23

I'm on a flight and I should

33:25

be doing something I don't because I

33:27

don't want someone to look over and

33:29

seeing that I've got like a script

33:31

open I'm like you absolutely Wanker on

33:33

the same but my friends got one

33:35

of those security guards on her phone.

33:37

Yeah, so I used to have that

33:39

but I broke it They're really annoying

33:41

laptops different. Yeah, everyone can see no

33:43

people have got a thing you can

33:45

get it on your laptop as well

33:47

that it guards your screen. If I

33:49

was dealing with like graphs Sure, I

33:51

don't care KPI I must say I'm

33:53

always if I'm next to someone on

33:55

the plane. I'm always looking at what

33:57

they're looking. You know what I'm really

33:59

scared of about. That one day the

34:01

man next to me will be looking

34:04

at pornography. That's not going to happen.

34:06

It's a Wi-Fi enabled flight. And then

34:08

you know what I did? I watched

34:10

a show that I'd never heard of

34:12

before. It was a short flight so

34:14

I had to go to a box

34:16

seat and watch it. A

34:19

full-on sex scene and you're sitting

34:21

there watching it. And then I

34:23

thought, what am I worried about

34:25

the guy next to me? That's

34:27

you. Look what I... He's having

34:29

to watch someone straddle someone and

34:32

ride them into town. Hello? What

34:34

show is this? Well we're trying

34:36

to eat a chicken and feta

34:38

pie. Just not, right. But I

34:40

am, are you paranoid about that,

34:42

that you'll see it? Someone doing

34:44

that on the plane. Yeah, it's

34:47

just, because also men have lost,

34:49

I would say predominantly men, because

34:51

of the pornification of the world.

34:53

People have lost their boundaries, like

34:55

I was thinking the other day,

34:57

that even when we talk about

34:59

stuff in front of kids, people

35:01

will go, oh, that's real estate

35:04

porn, or that's food porn. We

35:06

use those expressions in front of

35:08

children. That's how desensitize sensitatise we

35:10

are, we are, yes. to what

35:12

is just life's pleasures. Lunch is

35:14

not porn, it's lunch. Sauce day

35:16

porn. Yeah, it's just we use

35:18

that as an expression in front

35:21

of children. Stop saying it. Stop

35:23

saying it. Stop saying it. Stop

35:25

saying it. And also stop watching

35:27

it. You're much better off when

35:29

you don't watch it. No, you

35:31

really are. So I tried to

35:33

when Hughes is stop doing it.

35:35

Hmm. What do you do? He

35:38

didn't. So sitting in the cafe.

35:40

All right. And this man walks

35:42

in. And I'm like, oh, he's

35:44

famous. Oh. And you know when

35:46

that thing starts in your head,

35:48

you're like, oh, what's the show?

35:50

What's the show? What's the show?

35:53

What's the show? What's the show?

35:55

What's the show? What's the show?

35:57

And then he ended up on

35:59

the tables. I can't remember. sat

36:01

down drinking his takeaway coffee and

36:03

I just became fixated on figuring

36:05

out who is this guy and

36:07

it did my head in it

36:10

was so many minutes give me

36:12

a give me a demographic had

36:14

a bit of facial hair very

36:16

very good hair you know all

36:18

of that handsome handsome yeah yeah

36:20

yeah tall turns out it was

36:22

my hairdresser That

36:28

would be so long. I'm like,

36:30

this TV show, that didn't seem

36:32

to be on the white bonus,

36:35

maybe he's on the white bonus.

36:37

Go through all the shows I'm

36:39

watching. And they're like, he's your

36:41

hairdresser, you idiot. But in a

36:43

minute, didn't he recognize you? It

36:45

was quite a distance. It was

36:47

from the other corner. I'm sitting,

36:49

no, no, no. Obviously not. Anyway,

36:51

very funny. And then I noticed,

36:53

I don't know his name. Oh.

36:55

Because when I book on the

36:57

thing, there's like, I just, there's

36:59

five of them, and no matter

37:01

who I click, it's him. Oh.

37:03

And I, it's, it's a long,

37:05

the relate that a man's. And

37:07

also, you know what you've got?

37:09

Mate. Buddy Champ sport, mate. There's

37:11

a male relationship with the barber

37:13

is an odd one because there's

37:16

only two hairstyles you can get

37:18

as a guy, just, you know,

37:20

number one or two around the

37:22

size and a bit off the

37:24

top. What else you're gonna get,

37:26

mate? Like what on earth could

37:28

you possibly ask for? So there's

37:30

a barber shop on every corner

37:32

now. Have you noticed there's so

37:34

many bar shops? I thought they're

37:36

a front. Well no. But the

37:38

last time I was in barley

37:40

I was in Bali and had

37:42

been a long gap between when

37:44

I was in when I was

37:46

in Bali. So it's been like

37:48

10 years or 12 years or

37:50

whatever, literally every second shop is

37:52

a barber shop and I'm like

37:54

that's a front. This is what

37:57

I feel, my little theory, guys

37:59

get their hair cut so much

38:01

more now. We're getting it, I'm

38:03

getting my hair cut. every two

38:05

or three, every two weeks. And

38:07

it's a 30-bark. Yeah, why are

38:09

you? Not even 15 minutes. Couldn't

38:11

think of anything more nerve-wracking. What

38:13

is this? Am I on? No.

38:15

When you go to the, when

38:17

you go to Barbara here, are

38:19

they doing like they doing those

38:21

old Western movies and they're lathering

38:23

you up and they're getting out

38:25

the strap? If you go to

38:27

those very old school ones that

38:29

have those like 70 year old

38:31

Italian men still doing them. They

38:33

do it. I don't think anything

38:36

could make me hot air ballooning

38:38

or someone else shaving me with

38:40

a razor in the middle of

38:42

a barber. I've got a fantasy

38:44

about myself doing it. To your

38:46

husband or getting it done to

38:48

you. Oh. Oh. Okay. Go to

38:50

a barber shop one day in

38:52

this gate getting a razor. What

38:54

do you do it? You don't

38:56

need it. I'm not saying you

38:58

need it. You have beautiful skin.

39:00

Yeah, hang on. You have a

39:02

beautiful hairless space. You can't. Also,

39:04

you know what the giveaway was?

39:06

Your tell was, if you're a

39:08

poker player. No. No, the way

39:10

that you absolutely convulsed with laughter.

39:12

That was the tell, my friend.

39:14

No, I've got a fantasy. The

39:17

same way I've got a fantasy

39:19

from an old Western film that

39:21

I'll fill up a tub in

39:23

the middle of a room with

39:25

a screen behind it and my

39:27

knicker is hanging over it and

39:29

I'll give some dirty old cowboy

39:31

a good scrubbing. I get it.

39:33

I just remember his name. It's

39:35

leaf. Thank you for the clip.

39:37

It's doing good job with you.

39:39

In and out. You know? Love

39:41

it. Very small, two or three

39:43

seats, Max. You even want, you

39:45

know what else, you really want

39:47

as a man? What do you

39:49

want? No booking. Oh no, no,

39:51

booking. What do you mean as

39:53

a man? Everyone wants to be.

39:56

No, no, no, no, no. But

39:58

like, it's not too risky for

40:00

a woman, because your hair takes

40:02

an hour and a half. That's

40:04

why I go to my chiropractor.

40:06

A male, no booking barber. Do

40:08

I what? Have you seen the

40:10

new Cairo yet? No, I haven't

40:12

seen him yet. I haven't seen

40:14

Novakjokovich's chiropractor yet. Come on, we're

40:16

all waiting. But you know what?

40:18

I haven't told you. Oh, we

40:20

haven't cooked up for a while.

40:22

Yeah, here we go. Okay. Let's

40:24

do sauce day right now. I

40:26

read a thing about lower back

40:28

pain. Yeah, I think it's like

40:30

20, 20, 20 time. Okay, so

40:32

it gets absorbed right. Oh, look

40:34

at you, K2. K2. K2? So

40:37

you are? What? Do you have

40:39

vitamin K? No, do that's vitamin

40:41

K. I just had some vitamin

40:43

D. I'm doing 10,000, which I

40:45

think is 10, 20. 20. Yeah,

40:47

it is. I think it's taking

40:49

a toll on, mate. Is it

40:51

coming out in your wheat? It's

40:53

sunshine. It's sunshine. It's sunshine. It's

40:55

sunshine. It's sunshine. See? You thought

40:57

it was going to be terrible.

40:59

And it was great. But I

41:01

just, guess what? What? My backstop.

41:03

Give it to me, sir. because

41:05

you know I will do anything

41:07

for your lower back. No, but

41:09

also to invoke some magic rather

41:11

than go see a professional. But

41:13

isn't vitamin D on tap for

41:16

free from the sky? It is.

41:18

Just get out there and get

41:20

under the sun. I don't have

41:22

time to get out there. I'm

41:24

really busy but it doesn't take

41:26

long to take tablets. It really

41:28

doesn't. No. No, you're right. Your

41:30

sungaze without sunglasses. Why you just

41:32

take your top off and get

41:34

some vitamin D while you're at

41:36

it. petty annoyences. Yes. The ironically

41:38

the annoying segment that sometimes plays

41:40

on the buck up, but we

41:42

love it because things that annoy

41:44

me. We get it out. I

41:46

hate how. Hang on, do you

41:48

need the intro? It's things that

41:50

annoy me. Oh here we go.

41:52

I hate that I'm doing this.

41:54

Here you are. I knew this

41:57

would grow on you. In? I

41:59

knew you'd come around. Well it's

42:01

a it's a it's a perennial

42:03

with Americans. Please do. When Americans

42:05

in films or on TV have

42:07

to take medication. They don't. Why

42:09

do they always do a dry

42:11

swallow? Let's talk about the dry

42:13

swallow and pills. You have to

42:15

be over the sink, you have

42:17

to have water, you have to

42:19

battle it, you have to put

42:21

your head right back. It's like

42:23

a whole thing. But this guy

42:25

in white lotus for instance and

42:27

they do it all the time.

42:29

The dad was actually in the

42:31

bathroom standing over the sink and

42:33

he did a dry swallow. I'm

42:36

going to tell you something and

42:38

maybe you're going to know why

42:40

I married the guy. Cody's a

42:42

dry swallow. He's swallowing skills. Oh

42:44

no, no, no. No, listen, I

42:46

might even get a video of

42:48

him doing it for the buck

42:50

up in stuff. He can throw

42:52

four in and swallow dry. What

42:54

about tablets? But there's people out

42:56

there that do this, dry swallowers.

42:58

Why does he try swallow? But

43:00

every American is a dry swallow.

43:02

But every American is a dry

43:04

swallow up. But only in TV

43:06

shows. Well, how do we know?

43:08

Well that's a good point. Yeah.

43:10

That's where you can only go

43:12

off the representation of them. If

43:14

it wants to be realistic, someone

43:17

needs to have the glass of

43:19

water and then do that painful

43:21

swallow. Because they do it all

43:23

the time, it makes me think

43:25

that it really is a thing

43:27

that they do. Like say aluminum.

43:29

Because otherwise someone would go oregano.

43:31

Yes, herb, oregano, herb, I like

43:33

to say oregano. Oh, yeah, why?

43:35

But some favorite of my, um,

43:37

things, can you play that segment

43:39

intro again? Oh, no. When your

43:41

podcast host, there's oregano. What about

43:43

when your podcast? has done nothing

43:45

but slam. One of your ideas,

43:47

this is arms to gank, nie,

43:49

nie, nie, nie, and then, willy,

43:51

nearly out of nowhere, starts to

43:53

play along. I love it, and

43:56

this is why I love you.

43:58

Because you're open to the world.

44:00

And it's possibilities, as you always

44:02

say, right? Yes, yes. Dana, Buckhead

44:04

Dana messaged. Oh, I love a

44:06

message. We haven't had any messages

44:08

from that. We actually have, but

44:10

we just are so delayed in

44:12

checking them. So please don't stop.

44:14

How do I check them? No,

44:16

we're not letting you know. Well,

44:18

because you put them in. And

44:20

then they look like... But what

44:22

about the one that I brought

44:24

you last week from the American?

44:26

I don't even know how I

44:28

got that. Exactly. I will shock

44:30

you read something out from your

44:32

phone. No, but whenever you grab

44:34

your phone and read something out

44:37

and read something out and read

44:39

something out and read something out

44:41

and it works, and it works,

44:43

it works, it works, it works,

44:45

it works, it works, it works,

44:47

it works, I'm always, I'm always,

44:49

I'm always, I'm always, I'm always

44:51

really impressed. So am I. With

44:53

the Buckhead Christmas Special in December,

44:55

I gave a hot tip to

44:57

survive Christmas was to just copy

44:59

elderly men or your dad or

45:01

your uncle and just leave the

45:03

room and go and stand in

45:05

the backyard. And gaze out and

45:07

stand in gaze. Yes. Men of

45:09

a certain age. Just look out.

45:11

Yeah. It all reminds me I

45:13

want some more, um, what do

45:16

you want? Skull Island prawns. Oh.

45:18

But go on. Buckhead Dana messages

45:20

this. There is

45:22

an actual Italian term for

45:24

this exact thing. Umarral, we're

45:26

going to say, U-M-A-R-E-L-L, U-A-L,

45:28

U-A-L, U-A-L, U-A-L, U-A-L, U-U-A-L,

45:31

U-U-A-L, U-U-A-L, U-A-L, is an

45:33

Italian folk term that refers

45:35

specifically to a doll. He's

45:38

an umeral doll. You can

45:40

buy the dolls and they're

45:42

made out of resin. They're

45:44

gorgeous and it's men peeping

45:47

through. Yeah, it's that. it's

45:49

that man and they peep

45:51

through you know how on

45:53

construction sites they leave a

45:56

hole sometimes in the oh

45:58

yeah I do and you

46:00

put that I can't remember

46:03

what is called the umarillo

46:05

or whatever yeah yeah you

46:07

can put him on your

46:09

desk I want and he

46:12

watches you while you work

46:14

I want one yes they're

46:16

beautiful so there we go

46:18

there is a term for

46:21

it I've forgotten about that

46:23

in Bologna I love this

46:25

do you want a little buck up

46:27

yeah that's why I'm here This early

46:29

in the morning, me too. I haven't

46:31

even had breakfast yet. You

46:34

know, there's certain things that

46:36

we love, like hullabaloo. Love it.

46:38

Usually, supper's array! Life changing. Do

46:40

you think we could get her on?

46:42

Oh my God, please let's get her

46:45

on. We couldn't tell her that we'd

46:47

do that. If she got the offer

46:49

to come on our pod and then

46:51

checked our Instagram, she wouldn't. But also

46:53

then we'd have to ask about what

46:55

happened to him. Okay, forget

46:58

that's a bad idea. Herpies. I

47:00

think they can get rid of

47:02

that now. There's the buck.

47:04

I think that can. See you

47:06

next week. I'm off to the

47:08

doctor. One of them that I

47:11

love is just a phenomenon

47:13

that comes around every, I'm

47:15

going to say, half a

47:17

dozen years. And it's

47:20

foreign accent syndrome. Uh-huh.

47:22

So people will have

47:24

a medical episode. When

47:26

they come to... Before you play

47:28

this, let me just say. I

47:31

truly think when this happens, it

47:33

is one of the funniest things

47:35

in the world. Me too. In

47:37

the world. I don't think it

47:39

maybe it is for the person,

47:41

but I don't know if it's

47:43

like a real thing, but they

47:46

do seem to be real and

47:48

genuine. Apparently it's real. So there's a

47:50

few cases in the world, and I know...

47:52

I don't want to sound like a specialist

47:54

in the field but I know all of

47:56

them. I don't really love all of them.

47:58

This is your Roman Empire. People that have

48:01

strokes and voices change. Yeah, right.

48:03

And their accents change. And this

48:05

one, I don't know why this

48:07

popped up the other day, but

48:09

I'm like, oh, hello old friend.

48:11

Oh, I reckon I know it.

48:14

Is it the O.G? Oh. Sarah

48:16

Colwell from Plymouth in England is

48:18

a dead set palm, who now

48:20

sounds like she's from Shanghai. It

48:22

wasn't until I was in ambulance

48:24

on the way to the hospital.

48:26

She actually said, you're aware of

48:28

the way you were speaking. And

48:31

I said, oh, I sound like

48:33

I have a solar. And she

48:35

said, no, you sound like you

48:37

can work at a Chinese restaurant.

48:39

Do you believe it? Yes, I

48:41

do. Well, I do, because she

48:43

was so not a grifter. Uh-huh.

48:45

And just a regular person. I

48:48

think so. And everyone around her

48:50

was like, but I want to

48:52

know where Sash, greatest producer in

48:54

the world, a lot of free

48:56

time. Can you find out where

48:58

she is now? And what she

49:00

sounds like now? Did she have

49:02

another stroke, unfortunately? Do I have

49:05

a salute? Snapped her back. Just

49:07

amazing, because there's a whole lot

49:09

of them and they never do

49:11

a follow-up. Never. Where are they

49:13

now? Where are they now? With

49:15

people with the accents. Yes, with

49:17

foreign accent syndrome. And also, then

49:19

people get angry at them, because

49:22

you know how people are now.

49:24

Sensitive. Cultural appropriation. Which is really

49:26

only something that Western is believing.

49:28

with her long blonde week. Do

49:30

you know what I mean? Sure.

49:32

For sure. And I totally get

49:34

why black women have had this

49:36

pressure to have, you know, Western

49:39

style hair, but it don't have

49:41

to be blonde. Okay. Right? So

49:43

they get a lot of heat

49:45

about going, can you imagine her

49:47

going through life? Also, she couldn't

49:49

go to a Chinese restaurant. Oh,

49:51

why not? It wasn't until I

49:53

was in the ambulance on the

49:56

way to a hospital. She actually

49:58

said, are you aware of the

50:00

way you're speaking? She can. She

50:02

can't. She always sounds like I

50:04

can still. And she said, no,

50:06

you sound like you can work

50:08

a Chinese restaurant. She cannot go

50:10

into a Chinese restaurant. She absolutely

50:13

cannot. So she's going to find

50:15

her, we're going to find her.

50:17

We're going to make her talk.

50:19

And see what she's doing. Oh,

50:21

I love her. And hey, if

50:23

there's any bucko listening that had

50:25

a stroke and woke up. The

50:27

next day and they were speaking

50:30

in a different accent. We love

50:32

you. It's very rare. It's rare,

50:34

but it's very rare. They exist.

50:36

Why do you have to acknowledge

50:38

every... Because it's the right thing

50:40

to do. Yeah, but this is

50:42

not that... But that's not this

50:44

podcast. I think you've forgotten... Well,

50:47

I think you are forgetting how

50:49

many people out there might have

50:51

this condition. And this could be

50:53

more listeners. Oh, I love you.

50:55

This is a positive one from

50:57

Lynn but it's just so confusing

50:59

her what you're admitting is I

51:01

just had a mini stroke. This

51:04

is a positive one from Lynn

51:06

but it's just so confusing because

51:08

what mums of a certain age

51:10

need to realize this is a

51:12

positive one from Lynn but it's

51:14

just so confusing because what mums

51:16

of a certain age need to

51:19

realize is that No one else

51:21

except them knows where everyone is

51:23

in their pregnancy journey. Who's due?

51:25

Who's having this? Who's having that?

51:27

I have a very big family,

51:29

okay? So many people. But give

51:31

me a numerical value. In terms

51:33

of what? How many? Okay. Mom

51:36

comes from a family of 10?

51:38

So there's 10 siblings there. Every

51:40

single one of them except Uncle

51:42

Trev, hello Uncle Trev, former priest.

51:44

The other nine all married and

51:46

have kids. How many kids on

51:48

average do they each have? Well

51:50

then there's dad's side, he's one

51:53

of four, they're all married. I

51:55

think, I get it a bit

51:57

wrong. First cousins? Yeah. I think

51:59

in the 30s, low 40s. Okay,

52:01

that's wow. That's why your wedding

52:03

was political, I remember. Right? No,

52:05

why my show sell well? The

52:07

comedy first. Yes, very hand. Coming

52:10

on Wednesday. Big family. Yeah. And

52:12

now, cousin's kids are old. I

52:14

was at a wedding last week

52:16

and my cousin's kids are 20.

52:18

Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah. Like what?

52:20

Oh, I remember them being born

52:22

and they're in uni. That's crazy.

52:24

And you know what will happen

52:27

next? You'll be at their wedding.

52:29

Crazy. And you'll be Kooky Uncle

52:31

Nate. Kuckey? Hello. How would they

52:33

describe you? Kuckey. Let's go Kuckey.

52:35

Uncle Nate and his husband. Usually,

52:37

Subsuree. Everyone should have a gay

52:39

uncle. So much. And it's devastating

52:41

to me that I don't have

52:44

one. It's pretty great. Mine had

52:46

multiple sclerosis and was at Jehovah

52:48

Jehovah's Witness. But I did adore

52:50

him. Beautiful Although when dad died...

52:52

What did you mention that? Oh

52:54

because when dad died... For some

52:56

reason there were all these weird

52:58

photos that were brought... we were

53:01

in lockdown right? And my brother

53:03

came down from Queensland for the

53:05

funeral and we were only allowed

53:07

to have 10 people and so

53:09

there were these weird photos that

53:11

got battered up and in one

53:13

of them because dad's always been

53:15

like mum-all-off and said when I

53:18

met your father I thought it

53:20

was a homosexual right because dad's

53:22

always been European and not particularly

53:24

macho or whatever. Anyway, there was

53:26

a photo that in the midst

53:28

of all the grief and the

53:30

plans or whatever, there was a

53:32

photo of him with a guy,

53:35

a black and white photo, where

53:37

they were both wearing trench coats

53:39

and one of them was tied

53:41

with like a glittery scarf and

53:43

they had their arms around each

53:45

other and I went, oh my

53:47

goodness, my goodness, my father was

53:49

a homosexual man. and I didn't

53:52

mention it to anyone because I'm

53:54

like I don't want to try

53:56

this spanner in the work so

53:58

whatever. Of course not. Why would

54:00

you? for the podcast. And then

54:02

after that, at the funeral, that

54:04

was one of the photos that

54:06

was framed and put at the

54:09

front with the flowers. And I'm

54:11

like, this is not right. And

54:13

I just said to mom, who

54:15

chose that photo? And she said,

54:17

which photo? And I said, that

54:19

photo of dad with that guy.

54:21

She goes, that's his brother. So

54:23

it was a photo of him

54:26

with his brother. Strange,

54:29

that whole journey that he

54:31

took me on. It's a

54:33

long journey. Anyway, everyone should

54:35

have a guy uncle. So

54:38

Lynn does this often. She

54:40

sends a photo the other

54:42

day of a six-hour-old baby.

54:44

The photo is right up

54:46

close. It's just this wet,

54:49

new, red baby. Eyes closed,

54:51

nurse hand on the head,

54:53

sends it to the group.

54:55

and just leaves it and

54:57

then I write back, who?

55:00

Whose is that? And then

55:02

she writes back like in

55:04

caps, Allison! Okay, sorry, sorry,

55:06

I didn't know who that

55:09

was. Does it quite often.

55:11

So my text from mom

55:13

is a random baby and

55:15

there's been many. Random babies,

55:17

she's furious at me. But

55:20

not knowing. You're an idiot.

55:22

About, about, about, about, about,

55:24

about, about, about. And then

55:26

sometimes she says, it's your

55:28

cousins. Well, which ones are

55:31

you should know? Which one

55:33

of the 32? The women?

55:35

Men have babies. They call

55:37

them fathers. The Buckup podcast

55:39

is hosted by me, Kate

55:42

Langbrook, and him, Naith Valvo.

55:44

It's produced by the brilliant

55:46

Sasha French. audio and sound

55:48

by the magnificent yack Lawrence.

55:50

You might call him Jack

55:53

and Dom Evans. Oh we're

55:55

lucky.