Episode Transcript
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can be found in
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the episode description. Tasha
1:52
ruining Parade Day. I
1:54
ruin every day. Not
1:56
just parade day. Come
1:58
on. Roo every day. Oh.
2:00
Oh yes, I do that too. Hello
2:02
everyone and welcome back to the Crit
2:04
Show. Oh are we all? Oh are
2:06
we all playing the clockwinders? Hello, everyone.
2:09
Hello Jake. Hi. We're trying to get
2:11
in the previous 15 that we missed.
2:13
Okay. Do you just want to like
2:15
get them all out at once or
2:17
do you just want to like get
2:20
them all out at once or do
2:22
you just want to torment me over
2:24
time? Oh. I mean turn about is
2:26
fair play. I'm fucking with you. Last
2:29
time around, the squad finished
2:31
up their individual
2:33
contributions to the longevity
2:35
of the clockwinders and
2:38
were informed that they
2:40
are going to be in a parade.
2:42
Each of them had a new idea
2:45
for a way to enhance the parade.
2:47
Tass went looking for, well,
2:49
pursued the information to go
2:52
looking for a band. And
2:54
by Tass, I of course
2:56
mean Einen because... Maxine
2:58
went and found a black
3:00
market fireworks dealer and Cade
3:03
went to a schoolhouse and
3:05
recruited a bunch of children.
3:07
And that really about covers
3:09
it. That brings us back to
3:12
current events. So let's hop back
3:14
in, having jumped forward a little
3:16
bit in time to clock
3:18
night and let's rejoin Eyn. Eyn,
3:21
you know that this band has
3:23
a gig scheduled for tonight. You
3:25
know where it is where it
3:27
is. And do you want to
3:29
name the band or do you
3:32
want me to name the band?
3:34
Uh, yeah, I know their name.
3:36
Hit me. Uh, they are suns
3:38
edging. No, they are, ether
3:41
beaver. Okay. I had to think
3:43
on it for a second. Like,
3:45
like eager beaver. I got, yeah.
3:47
The ethers in the world. Yeah.
3:49
I know you you you can
3:51
come up with it. No you
3:54
already you did it. All right.
3:56
It's either beaver. Okay. So you
3:58
know where either be is performing
4:00
this evening and you know the front
4:02
man is named Ayan Anand. What is
4:05
your approach here? What are you doing?
4:07
I think just wherever this venue is
4:09
I'm just I'm gonna go I'm gonna
4:11
enjoy the show watch have a few
4:14
drinks and wait for it to wrap
4:16
up before I go try to speak
4:18
with them. Okay you have no problem
4:21
like getting into the venue it's not
4:23
like it's locked down or anything it
4:25
is a little tavern they are playing
4:27
on a Very slightly elevated stage that
4:30
is in one corner of the
4:32
tavern. It's just kind of one
4:34
big room here. You grab a
4:36
seat you enjoy the show or
4:38
maybe I don't know is is
4:40
music Einens thing? I think Einen
4:42
enjoys a good show. Is Einen
4:44
receptive to music unlike anything he's
4:46
ever heard before? Absolutely breaking
4:48
the mold. Yes. Okay, then
4:50
yeah, I think you fucking love
4:53
the show. Okay, because it's mindblowing.
4:55
I have no doubt And at
4:57
the end of it, Ayan yells out, we
4:59
are, ether beaver, thank you everyone,
5:01
good night. And everybody's like,
5:03
woo. And they disembark from
5:06
the stage and head through a door
5:08
into a back room or a green
5:10
room or something. I think I would,
5:13
I don't know, speak with like, are
5:15
they big enough to have security or
5:17
something or like roadies or like something,
5:20
someone out there working for them in
5:22
some capacity? I don't know if it's
5:24
a question of like, are they big
5:27
enough to like. need security or merit
5:29
security, but there is a security guy
5:31
Outstanding yeah, yeah, I'll go up and
5:33
give the guy a smile offer hand
5:36
to shake holds out a hand in
5:38
front of you at stop right there
5:40
Nobody's going back here. Oh, yes. No.
5:43
Of course I am actually I'm here
5:45
on behalf of the clockwinders I was
5:47
hoping to get some information on how
5:49
I might possibly be able to book
5:52
the band He's like the clockwinders lame
5:54
I know right it it is kind
5:56
of a rough situation but we're looking
5:58
to fix that. have quite a
6:01
spectacular parade upcoming that we thought
6:03
they might be interested in. Is
6:05
it a paid gig? Absolutely. All
6:07
right well they might be interested in
6:09
hearing you out then. Hold on a
6:11
second and he goes through the door
6:13
and shuts it behind him. All right. You
6:16
hear a little bit of chatter and
6:18
then he and then the door opens
6:20
and you see him kind of step to
6:22
the side and gesture you in. I'll follow
6:24
him in. All right. Yeah, you head
6:26
into a green room here. The band
6:29
is all sort of spread out, kicking
6:31
it, relaxing after the show, cleaning up,
6:33
and Ayan specifically looks in your direction.
6:35
Oh, you see, you're trying to book
6:38
us for a gig, I? Yes, in
6:40
fact, I am. Ayan, was it? Yeah.
6:42
Spectacular, I could listen to your voice.
6:44
All day, all night. Well, that would
6:47
put you with everybody else on the
6:49
world. You damn right. What's your name,
6:51
mate? Ian and Kearning a pleasure and
6:53
I'll offer a hand to shake. Ah yeah,
6:55
he holds out a hand to shakes.
6:57
I'll say I've heard of you all
6:59
of course and I've never got to
7:02
see you live until tonight and
7:04
you more than fit the hype.
7:06
Well it's very kind of you
7:08
to say mate. So what sort
7:10
of gig is this? I'm told
7:12
that you're with the clock winders
7:14
and there's kind of a snicker
7:16
that goes around the room. Aside
7:18
from, of course, fair payment, I
7:20
hope you'd be intrigued by doing
7:23
a, what sort of a moving
7:25
show. As far as I'm concerned,
7:27
every show we do is moving,
7:29
mate. Ah, very good. Very good.
7:31
Yes, we're planning a parade, day
7:33
after tomorrow. Yeah, he kind of
7:35
like looks at his bandmates
7:37
and they all kind of
7:39
exchange a look of like
7:42
hmm, interesting. Interesting. Yes,
7:44
more or less, we're going
7:46
to have a float, sort
7:48
of highlighting the clockwinders and
7:50
what we do, and functionally
7:52
we would rely on you for,
7:55
well, making it fun. I'm led
7:57
to believe there will be fireworks
7:59
involved. Oh, the band collectively
8:01
lets out a little. Ooh.
8:03
All right, Tass, why don't you roll
8:05
to overcome with rapport? And
8:08
I think we're trying to beat
8:10
a two. I think this is
8:12
fair difficulty based on how you
8:14
are stroking this guy's ego. Okay.
8:17
Well, I got a flat zero. Well,
8:19
that is less than a two. Yeah,
8:21
and I don't think I have anything
8:23
I can invoke here. Um, hmm, shit.
8:25
I don't actually have any thoughts on
8:28
this one. I don't have any ideas
8:30
of what I would accept. Okay, so
8:32
you can spend a fate point to
8:34
invoke other people's aspects, right? Yes. Could
8:37
you invoke my leave it to the
8:39
professionals since you referenced like we're getting
8:41
firework set up? Is this like, not only
8:43
or is there a parade about us, but
8:45
we are the ones putting it together so
8:48
it's going to be done right? Is that
8:50
what you want you want to do?
8:52
I like that, absolutely. I could see
8:54
that. Are you invoking it for a
8:56
re-roll or for a plus two? A
8:58
plus two would get me to my
9:00
goal. A re-roll might go terribly. Yeah,
9:02
I don't know how bad the roll
9:04
was. So I don't know if there's
9:07
anywhere to go but up. I could
9:09
technically do one lower or the same
9:11
or one higher that would still not
9:13
get me there. That's true. But if
9:15
if the plus two will get me...
9:18
It'll get you to the tie, so
9:20
you'll get what you want. with a
9:22
minor cost or you get a lesser version
9:24
of it. God part of me wants to
9:26
chance it so bad because I have a
9:29
decent I have a plus three I just
9:31
rolled a minus three these are the situations
9:33
that keep us up let's go for it
9:35
okay follow your heart yeah I'm gonna
9:37
go for it full re-roll all right
9:40
spend your fate point re-roll them dice
9:42
reroll them bones satisfying fully on the
9:44
spent fate point I don't know if
9:46
that picked up but a good
9:48
shook of it being removed from
9:50
its sheath all right here we
9:52
go Thank God that is now
9:54
a four okay. That's way better.
9:56
It is way better. That's like
9:58
seven better. Yeah That is a success,
10:01
not with style, but a success nonetheless.
10:03
So Iyan nods and kind of nods
10:05
at his bandmates who nod and return,
10:07
just lots of nodding going on all
10:10
around the room. He says, yeah, all
10:12
right, you got yourself a deal. We'll
10:14
play your show. It truly means a
10:16
lot. May I sit with you for
10:19
a moment? Sure. I don't want this
10:21
to sound like, you know, Ayn's trying
10:23
to like rise to their just kind
10:25
of level of... It's almost ridiculousness in
10:28
a way. Yeah, that too. But I
10:30
mean, this, I think he's very
10:32
genuinely like trying to bring it
10:34
down for a moment. Like just
10:36
bring the excitement down, so to
10:38
speak, not like, not make it
10:41
depressing. Yeah, Einstein's a downer. Right,
10:43
right, right, right. No, I think
10:45
that I just kind of take
10:47
them in for a moment. As
10:49
odd as it sounds, we really
10:51
are trying to make a big
10:54
change here. I know most everyone
10:56
has heard the stories of the
10:58
potential of the world starting to
11:00
turn again and all the things
11:02
that might happen if that were true,
11:04
but it is true. We're in a
11:06
very dangerous time and a time where
11:08
we need inspiration. So artists like
11:10
you, you have a chance to make
11:13
a real difference and add excitement to
11:15
something that might otherwise not be. So
11:17
I just hope that you keep that
11:19
in mind that maybe... Aside from the
11:22
pride you must already carry with the
11:24
skill that you employ on stage that
11:26
maybe this will be a historic day
11:28
for this entire planet You look around
11:30
and they are all hanging on your
11:33
every word They're all like the one
11:35
that was like lounging on the couch
11:37
is now like sitting up and leaning
11:40
forward to be closer to you and
11:42
Ayan's got sort of like a cool
11:44
guy sneer and nods and he's like
11:46
ride on night. We'll make history. I
11:49
have no doubt now that we've spoken
11:51
on this side like you to look
11:53
this over and I pull out my
11:56
notebook and I've got some lyrics about
11:58
a clockwinders like song if This McDonald's
29:39
meets the Minecraft universe with one of
29:41
six collectibles and your choice of a
29:44
Big Mac or ten-piece McNuggets with spicy
29:46
netherflame sauce now available with a Minecraft
29:48
movie meal. I participate in McDonald's for
29:50
a limited time on Minecraft movie only
29:53
in theaters. are,
32:02
but not necessarily what they
32:04
were. Now it is a
32:06
home for misfits those of
32:09
us with nowhere else to
32:11
go. Even criminals. All of
32:13
us have found a purpose,
32:15
meaning, training, friendship. But I
32:17
don't think most of you
32:19
understand why. We found all
32:21
this because we have a
32:23
united task. A common goal.
32:25
I'm not here to scare
32:27
any of you. But the
32:29
rumors are true. This world
32:32
has the potential to spin
32:34
again, to turn into oblivion.
32:36
And while that day is
32:38
very far off, that could
32:40
mean the ruin of our
32:43
future generations. And we mean
32:45
to put a stop to
32:47
that. We have fixed two
32:49
of the six cores, but
32:51
fixing them is only a
32:54
small goal. It is one
32:56
grain of sand in the
32:58
hourglass. Maintaining them. understanding them,
33:00
finding their deeper secrets, that
33:02
is what the clockwinders was. And
33:05
that is what it will continue
33:07
to be. Any of you that
33:09
are curious about the world, any
33:12
of you that are curious about
33:14
learning, not just about technology, engineering,
33:16
ether, and the secrets therein, but
33:19
about yourself and what you can
33:21
do with your life. We would
33:23
love to meet you. We would
33:25
love to have you. And I'm
33:28
sure. that your children and their
33:30
children after that will be grateful
33:32
for all of the work that
33:35
you put into this. I put
33:37
a hand on Maxine and Cade's
33:39
shoulders. In the last few weeks
33:41
alone, I have been inspired by
33:44
specialists like these. I've seen the
33:46
miracles that they've worked. So I
33:48
declare that today, today is the
33:51
first day of the new clockwinders.
33:53
Today is the day that I
33:55
fill my heart with hope. that
33:57
some of you faces in this crowd.
34:00
And right now, we'll
34:02
also display miracles within
34:04
our organization. And I step back.
34:06
There is a moment of
34:08
quiet before you hear somebody
34:11
start to clap, and then
34:13
another, and people join in.
34:15
People start to cheer. People
34:17
seem to celebrate your words.
34:19
They seem moved and excited.
34:21
And Chief Forman walks over
34:23
and like claps a hand
34:26
on your back, like a
34:28
job well done. But among
34:30
the... cheering and celebrating and
34:32
clapping, you do hear a
34:34
booing start to kind of
34:36
like, pierce through it. Like
34:39
you shouldn't be able to
34:41
hear it over the din,
34:43
but you can. You hear
34:45
somebody just, boo! Boo! And
34:47
a moment later, you hear
34:49
another one, somewhere else in
34:52
the crowd, and the people
34:54
cheering start to like, scale
34:56
it back, like... worried that
34:58
they're in the wrong. I will
35:00
take off my robot helmet. He's
35:03
a phony! Listen, we understand your
35:05
apprehension. Like we're not here to
35:07
convince you that the history of
35:10
the clockwinders or everything they've done
35:12
has been great. Anyone here who
35:14
knows the history, they've put themselves
35:17
up on pedestals and they've made
35:19
joining a punishment for crime. Like
35:21
he said, this is a new
35:24
start. Clockwinders aren't... These lofty scholars
35:26
and they're not criminals trying to
35:28
find a way out of a prison sentence.
35:30
It's people like you and me, people who
35:32
just want to make sure that the world
35:34
is safe so that we can go on
35:36
living our lives. The only way this works
35:39
is with everyday people and your booze are
35:41
heard and they're understood. We hope to change
35:43
your mind. You hear one of those booing
35:45
figures out in the crowd yell
35:47
out, if the clockwinders hadn't abandoned their
35:50
station, the world wouldn't be in jeopardy
35:52
in the first place. and you hear
35:54
another one somewhere else. You bullies have
35:57
run rampant over the entire planet for
35:59
decades! I like push forward past
36:01
Cade up to the front. It's
36:03
not like they all just abandoned
36:05
their posts. This is a very
36:07
difficult job. You have no idea
36:09
what we done. We had to
36:11
fight and go underwater and chase
36:13
crickets and fight a ghost? Just
36:16
like getting very flustered and like
36:18
upset. Some additional booths spring
36:20
up through the crowd. And actually
36:22
one of these individuals, somebody closer
36:24
to the front, like pushes forward.
36:26
You can see that it's a
36:28
slightly older guy and he's just
36:30
like red in the face with
36:32
anger. You think you all can
36:35
change what you are just because
36:37
you declare it? You've all been
36:39
liars and failures for longer than
36:41
I've been alive. I don't think
36:43
that's going to change today. And
36:45
he starts to just rush toward
36:47
the float that you all are
36:49
standing on. Whoa! I jump off the
36:52
float. I'm getting between everyone else
36:54
and him. All right, I think
36:56
we are stepping into a conflict
36:58
here and this guy started it. So
37:00
I think he gets to go first. Yeah.
37:02
So he is going to make an attack
37:04
against you with fight and he gets a
37:06
one. Do you want to defend? Yeah, absolutely.
37:09
All right, what are you defending with?
37:11
Um, athletics, I think, you know, I
37:14
think if he's coming in like to
37:16
whatever tackle me, punch me, whatever it
37:18
is, I'm just trying to like get
37:20
my arms around him. I'm trying to
37:22
stop him from swinging. Four all right,
37:24
you defend and you gain a boost.
37:26
Okay, that would put you next in
37:28
the order I'm just gonna try to
37:31
put him on the ground like again
37:33
I don't want to hurt him. I
37:35
just want to get his legs out from
37:37
under him and pin him down Okay, I
37:39
think this is still going to be a
37:42
roll to attack. You're just trying to
37:44
put a condition on him. Okay, what
37:46
do you think you're rolling with?
37:48
Probably fight okay, he's gonna try to
37:51
defend okay I got a five he got
37:53
a one all right So I'm going to give
37:55
him the condition of pinned. You
37:57
managed to sort of effortlessly
37:59
him on the ground and
38:01
hold him in place. Sir, listen,
38:04
I understand whatever they used to
38:06
be. They are no longer. I
38:08
hate to say it, but the
38:11
clockwinders have fallen apart. They are
38:13
a shell of what they used
38:15
to be, and we mean to
38:18
fix it. We are not here
38:20
to bully you or anyone else.
38:22
We're here to help. Task, give
38:24
me an overcome roll with
38:27
notice. Okay. That's a four. You
38:29
notice a couple of things. One,
38:31
out of your peripheral vision, you
38:33
see other figures moving forward out of
38:35
this crowd quickly and with hostility.
38:37
Some of those other people that
38:40
seem to be booing, they are,
38:42
like this man, rushing forward. And
38:44
two, as you restrain him, as you
38:46
are talking to him, he's thrashing, he's
38:49
fighting back against you, he turns his
38:51
head to look at you, and you
38:53
see the green tinge of ether behind
38:56
his eyes. And I think that is
38:58
where we will leave it off
39:00
this time around. So thank you
39:02
all for joining us for another
39:04
episode. If you are interested in
39:06
more information about the fate system
39:08
or the clock winders setting, you
39:11
can find that information in the
39:13
show notes. If you want to
39:15
see anything else that we've done
39:17
or listen to or read, etc.
39:19
Check out our patron, patreon.com/the Crits
39:21
show. If you become a patron,
39:24
you can get your name read
39:26
at the end of an episode,
39:28
just like Carl E. Dwayne. Thank
39:30
you very much. Hi Jake. And
39:32
you can also join the most
39:34
aggressively welcoming discord on the planet.
39:36
Absolutely true at the basis level.
39:38
Yeah. You know what? I was
39:40
thinking about this. I didn't want
39:42
to interrupt the flow of the
39:44
episode. And I feel like it's
39:46
been a long time since I've thrown.
39:49
two or three people if you
39:51
send us the song like the
39:53
lyrics the music whatever that
39:55
ether beaver is playing I
39:58
will send you some goodies
40:00
somebody let us know what
40:02
ether beaver was blasting during
40:05
this parade perfect yeah getting
40:07
on that fun little improv
40:09
contest thank you everybody for
40:11
listening as always tune in
40:14
next time for another episode
40:16
of the crit show and
40:18
everyone around this table tell
40:21
them good say bid them
40:23
end it bye bye say
40:25
good bye The
40:33
Crit Show is a Crit Show
40:35
Studios production edited and produced by
40:37
Brandon Wintz with music by Jake
40:39
Pearly. You can find more information
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40:44
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41:16
flourish. Modes of thought and entrant literature.
41:18
Second-year classics, Harbridge University. Seven years ago,
41:20
a Chinese military sub accidentally went down
41:22
in the Pacific Ocean. Turns out, the
41:25
sub fell smack in front of a
41:27
gigantic three-sided pyramid in the ruins of
41:29
what we now call Dark City. This
41:31
in Taran, the class. Seems like there's
41:33
a lot of debate about it. Legally,
41:35
I cannot stop you from teaching this
41:37
class, but I strongly advise that- What?
41:40
You know what? If you want to
41:42
tank your reputation, that's on you. You
41:44
don't believe a word I say about
41:46
it, Taran. You're right.
41:48
You're right. right. I do
41:50
do not believe Antara
41:53
exists. I don't
41:55
need to know. I
41:57
Is it real? to know.
41:59
Is came all the
42:01
way to China
42:03
to find out? all the
42:05
way everyone, get out
42:08
right now. Now, out?
42:10
what the hell
42:12
are you doing? I'm
42:14
gonna cut my
42:16
hands now. you're all
42:18
gonna feel it. what the
42:20
hell are you doing? I'm going to
42:23
cut my I told
42:25
you. you're all going of
42:27
thought it. Ow! See? I told you.
42:29
and audio drama by
42:31
Wolf of the Door of
42:33
the Door For more information,
42:35
more please visit please visit W.L.F.DR.com.
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