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1:32

You're listening to Comedy Central.

1:38

from the most trusted journalists

1:40

at Comedy Center. It's America's

1:42

only source for new things.

1:45

This is the Daily Journal

1:47

with your host, John. I

2:19

was just, I was just, no,

2:21

stop, this is it! Can I

2:23

tell you something? And I mean,

2:25

this is sincerely, ever since we

2:28

started spraying the audience with

2:30

cocaine before the show. Well,

2:32

I'm with the Daily Show.

2:34

My name is John Stewart.

2:36

Great show for you tonight.

2:38

Rahm Emanuel will be joining

2:40

me later to remind me.

2:48

Reminding me just

2:50

which one of the three

2:52

brothers he is again. I

2:55

don't know. See the one

2:57

that owns UFC? Does it

2:59

matter at this point? But

3:02

that is later. First, as

3:04

you know, our economy.

3:06

Our economy is in

3:08

the midst of a

3:10

beautiful metamorphosis. Turning

3:13

from a

3:15

simple caterpillar.

3:17

into a

3:20

dead caterpillar.

3:23

So

3:25

let's get

3:28

into it

3:31

with another

3:36

exciting

3:39

installment

3:42

of trade

3:45

wars. I was

3:47

thrilled. Excited about deregulation,

3:50

tax cuts, and the

3:52

fact that you could once again

3:54

call people sugar tits. One top

3:56

banker told the paper that

3:58

he feels liberated. Because now

4:01

he can use offensive slurs

4:03

like the R word and

4:05

the P word without fear

4:08

of getting canceled at work.

4:10

Hmm. The R word and

4:12

the P word? Well, I

4:14

can tell you today that

4:17

that top banker is definitely

4:19

using both of those words.

4:21

Perhaps even adding a motherfucker

4:23

right now. The market meltdown

4:26

for the third straight day.

4:28

Global markets are sinking. Markets

4:30

across Asia, Europe and Australia

4:32

plunging. At one point this

4:35

morning, the Dow sinking almost

4:37

1600 points. The markets lost

4:39

more than six and a

4:41

half trillion dollars in value.

4:44

This is an economic Armageddon.

4:59

wears a Hawaiian shirt to

5:02

an economic army. What are

5:04

we doing here? Pull you

5:07

in from the pool? Either

5:09

the financial channels, rod, need

5:12

danger field? I told my

5:14

wife about the stock plunge.

5:16

She said, oh, I thought

5:19

you guys would never go

5:21

down there. could

5:34

have lasting effects on the global

5:37

economy, on everyday Americans, and most

5:39

worryingly, the stock portfolios of members

5:41

of Congress. Mr. President, now is

5:44

the time to soothe a worried

5:46

nation. Donald Trump put this out

5:49

on social media. Don't be weak,

5:51

don't be stupid, don't be a

5:53

panican, which he has termed a

5:56

new party based on weak and

5:58

stupid people. Panicam?

6:09

The genius who

6:12

gave us classics

6:15

like Sleepy Joe

6:18

and Crooked Hillary

6:21

just shit out

6:24

you're a Panicam?

6:27

How about hysterocrats?

6:30

Repusicans! How about

6:33

cryontologists? Did

6:36

the overseas factory, you had

6:39

been sourcing your nicknames from,

6:41

get shut down during the

6:44

terror war? So we're going

6:46

to try this again, Mr.

6:49

President. Can you ease the

6:51

fears of this nation? Like

6:54

a true leader. President Trump,

6:56

holding firm, posting on true

6:59

social, only the week will

7:01

fail. Has the same tagline

7:04

as season three of squid

7:06

game? That's supposed to make

7:09

it feel better? Only the

7:11

week shall die in my

7:14

economy. By the way, in

7:16

case you didn't get the

7:19

point that he doesn't give

7:21

a f-f-t-f-t. He spent the

7:24

weekend showing, not telling. He

7:26

played not a round of

7:29

golf this weekend, a tournament

7:31

of golf. A three-day tournament.

7:34

812 holes of golf with

7:36

his live golf Saudi benefactors.

7:39

And in case you're wondering

7:41

about the venerated journalists who

7:44

are now allowed to be

7:46

in the press pool, this

7:49

was literally the first question

7:51

he was asked on Air

7:54

Force One in the middle

7:56

of a financial meltdown. I

8:00

won the tournament mom.

8:03

I'm a good boy.

8:05

You heard I won.

8:07

I won. You heard

8:10

I won. I won.

8:12

I won. Mom. I

8:14

won. Mom. I won.

8:16

Mom. I won. Mom.

8:19

Mom. I won. I

8:21

won the tournament. Mom.

8:23

I'm a good boy.

8:26

Good boy. Good boy.

8:31

I know the stock market is

8:33

not the totality of the economy,

8:35

but if I remember correctly in

8:37

the run-up to the election, Trump

8:39

seemed very concerned about the stock

8:41

market. If Harris wins this election,

8:43

the result will be a Kamala

8:45

economic crash, a 1929-style depression. And

8:48

anything she can do, I can

8:50

do better! And

9:09

it didn't have to happen like

9:11

this. Trump had so many options

9:13

to shape the world economy into

9:15

the one he thought was fairer.

9:17

He could have proposed some incentives

9:19

to bring back manufacturing. He could

9:22

have gone sector to sector, nation

9:24

to nation, and negotiate better trade

9:26

reciprocal agreements. But he had to

9:28

go to full Teresa. To

9:42

be fair to the Trump

9:45

administration, they did give it

9:47

almost two months and no

9:49

effort before they asked chat

9:51

GPT what it thought they

9:53

should do. But for those

9:55

of us who've been tricked

9:57

into believing that an economic

10:00

crisis is a crisis, Trump's

10:02

people have an answer. Don't

10:04

panic. Calm down. Everything's going

10:06

to be okay. I wouldn't

10:08

not worry at all. The

10:10

Dow's actually in the same

10:12

place it was in August.

10:15

Do me a favor. Don't

10:17

look at your stock portfolio.

10:19

You know what? I don't

10:21

really care about my 401k.

10:23

Leave, laugh, love. That's what

10:25

I always say. You know

10:27

what I say to you.

10:30

It's 401k somewhere. And when

10:33

did the Wright become so

10:35

chill? Aren't you the Bud

10:38

Lights turning my kid's trans

10:40

folks? But economic meltdown and

10:42

you're getting all philosophical? Losing

10:45

money costs you nothing. This

10:47

is just the reality of

10:50

life. Like, were you young

10:52

and dumb? Everyone loses money.

10:54

Everyone loses money. Everyone loses

10:57

money. It costs you nothing.

10:59

Except money. Losing money. Losing

11:02

money. Cost you money. Definition

11:04

of losing money. And I

11:07

know you go, well, it's

11:09

going to be worth it

11:11

to get the character of

11:14

the country that we want

11:16

back again. But we have

11:19

no fucking idea if that's

11:21

actually what's going to happen.

11:24

You're all acting like the

11:26

tariff regime is a tried

11:28

and true remedy. Oh, of

11:31

course, this is the medicine

11:33

that's always prescribed, except the

11:36

last time it was tried

11:38

a hundred years ago, we

11:41

had a great depression. So

11:43

how does this work? It's

11:45

just a big game of

11:48

economic operation as he's sticking

11:50

things in trying to take

11:53

out tariffs. It's like, you

11:55

know, when you're up my

11:57

age, you gotta call it

12:00

ascopy, you need a full

12:02

colonic, like, to feel better,

12:05

you know what I mean?

12:07

Rackwhist can kill somebody in

12:10

the wrong dosages, but in

12:12

the right dosages, that can

12:14

be very healthy. for the

12:17

patient. So everyone relax. This

12:19

is merely a routine rat

12:22

poison colonoscopy. By the way,

12:24

what's the right dosage of

12:27

rat poison? Oh, if you

12:29

get enough. By the way,

12:31

what's the right dosage of

12:34

rat poison? I mean, it's

12:36

just slightly off topic, but

12:39

the colonoscopy guy? His name

12:41

is John Tobacco? That's a

12:44

witness protection thing, isn't it?

12:46

Here's how it's going to

12:48

go, your new name is

12:51

John Tobacco. Say

12:53

it back to me John tobacco

12:55

your name is John tobacco

12:57

say it back to me John

13:00

tobacco your new profession is you

13:02

do anus metaphors on newsbacks Your

13:05

name is John tobacco you do

13:07

anus metaphor. Say back If Trump

13:09

wants us to stay the course

13:12

with his radical plan You

13:14

might want to think of a

13:16

strategy that inspires our confidence that

13:19

you all know what you're doing?

13:21

Like for instance, these tariffs. Is

13:23

this a negotiation? The president made

13:26

it clear yesterday, this is not

13:28

a negotiation. Let me make

13:30

this very clear. This is not

13:33

a negotiation. This is not that.

13:35

This is a national emergency.

13:37

Okay, it's a national emergency. It's

13:39

not a negotiation. Well, I don't

13:42

agree, but at least I have

13:44

some clarity now. The tariffs

13:46

give us great power to negotiate.

14:00

So much rat

14:02

poison. So is

14:04

this a negotiation

14:07

or is this

14:09

permanent? It can

14:11

both be true.

14:13

There can be

14:15

permanent tariffs and

14:17

there can also

14:19

be negotiations. How

14:21

much white Lotus

14:24

did you people

14:26

watch? What

14:30

is permanence? In this negotiated

14:32

life we live. Have a

14:34

peanut colata. Forget about if

14:36

they're permanent or not permanent.

14:38

What are we doing? How

14:40

will this bring jobs back?

14:43

What are these jobs? Commerce

14:45

Secretary Lutnik. Trillions of dollars

14:47

of factories are going to

14:49

be built in America. The

14:51

army of millions and millions

14:53

of human beings screwing in

14:55

little, little screws to make

14:57

iPhones, that kind of thing

14:59

is going to come to

15:01

America. Americans

15:21

can develop the Dexter I

15:24

Can't even get the lint

15:26

out of the charging area

15:29

on my phone now I

15:31

got a new Those are

15:34

the jobs that kind of

15:36

thing is going to come

15:39

to America. It's going to

15:41

be automated and great Americans

15:44

the trade craft of America

15:46

is going to fix them

15:49

mechanics fixing robotics So

15:53

it's not the screws.

15:55

We're going to be

15:58

robot mechanics. The robots

16:00

do the screw. And

16:03

we're just there to

16:05

make sure the robots

16:08

are loomed. And ready

16:10

to screw. That is

16:13

the American Renaissance. We

16:15

are robot fluffers. We

16:18

are. We are waiting.

16:20

This is all. to

16:23

these onerous tariffs have

16:25

to stay in place

16:28

to convince me to

16:30

build my army of

16:33

automated screw and robot

16:35

mechanics. They are definitely

16:38

going to stay in

16:40

place for days and

16:43

weeks. John Stewart for

16:45

Popular Robot Mechanics. I've

16:48

never built a fully

16:50

automated robot factory before,

16:53

but these days and

16:55

weeks, enough time. Or

16:59

too much time. Feels like

17:01

it would take him on.

17:03

Well, I guess that's silver

17:05

lining number one of this

17:08

trade war. Want something even

17:10

more underwhelming? Here's the Treasury

17:12

Secretary on if we've heard

17:14

the good news on the

17:16

stock collapse. One thing that

17:18

I can tell you is

17:20

the Treasury Secretary. What I've

17:22

been very impressed with is

17:24

the market infrastructure that we

17:27

had record volume on Friday

17:29

and everything is working very

17:31

smoothly so the American people.

17:33

the be very take great

17:35

comfort in that. Blink twice

17:37

if you want to be

17:39

saved. I was very impressed

17:41

that in the market crash

17:43

the building is still standing.

17:46

The captain of the... I

17:48

was very impressed by the

17:50

way that the Titanic... slid

17:52

into the water. Almost like

17:54

it was taking a bath.

17:56

Just dipping a toe. Those

17:58

drownings should take great comfort

18:00

in the lack of back

18:02

splash. But their best argument

18:05

so far for any of

18:07

this is the same one

18:09

that we got about Tinkerbell.

18:11

Being able to fly. You

18:13

have to believe. Don't panic.

18:15

Okay, you've got a president

18:17

who understands business. I am

18:19

grateful for a commander-in-chief that

18:21

has the business acumen. Luckily,

18:24

we have a businessman in

18:26

the White House right now.

18:28

The president did write the

18:30

book, The Art of the

18:32

Deal. Trump is a master,

18:34

a negotiator, and he does

18:36

know the art of the

18:38

deal. We're supposed to trust

18:40

this guy because he wrote

18:43

the art of the deal.

18:45

Yeah, that's why we're supposed

18:47

to trust them. You ever

18:49

look at Chapter 9 and

18:51

Art of the Deal? It's

18:53

about how smart Trump is

18:55

about his casino in Atlantic

18:57

City. Oh, oh, yeah, Chapter

19:00

9. I built the casino

19:02

in Atlantic City. I'm a

19:04

business genius. Whatever happened in

19:06

the casino, Donald? You

19:29

make a big announcement, but

19:31

your reciprocal tariff formula was

19:34

just the trade deficit divided

19:36

by imports equation. And when

19:39

you got busted on that,

19:41

you threw out this ridiculous,

19:43

fucking calculus problem that's just

19:46

shapes. It boils down to

19:48

the trade deficit divided by

19:51

imports. Which is

19:53

the formula that got the

19:55

rich country of Lesotho hit

19:58

with 50% tariffs Lesotho No,

20:00

you're free rides over, you

20:02

denim-making fat cats? But we

20:05

continue to blame everybody else

20:07

in the world that we

20:10

designed and policed after World

20:12

War II. We're the richest

20:15

country in the world ever.

20:17

We're not the world's victims.

20:19

If we have inequalities in

20:22

this country, that's on us.

20:24

It's not a supply problem.

20:27

It's not unfair trade. for

20:29

the most part. It's an

20:32

investment and distribution problem. It's

20:34

our fucking fault. And I'm

20:36

not saying we can't make

20:39

adjustments and renegotiate things, but

20:41

it didn't have to be

20:44

this reckless. You killed the

20:46

hostage and then went, so,

20:49

ransom? Some of the biggest

20:51

stock market declines since the

20:53

Great Depression. The worst three

20:56

consecutive sessions since 1987. Even

20:58

worse than it was during

21:01

the 2008 financial crisis. Their

21:03

worst day since June 2020

21:06

during the COVID pandemic. Financial

21:08

destruction not seen since the

21:10

pandemic. And this time, there's

21:13

no controversy over how it

21:15

all started. There's no wet

21:18

market. You, Trump, released the

21:20

contagion. It's your lab leak.

21:23

And it's right out in

21:25

the open. This is like

21:27

if the researchers at the

21:30

Wuhan Institute of Verology walked

21:32

out to the great lawn

21:35

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this company, Yes. I

24:01

guess tonight, former two-term

24:04

mayor of Chicago. He

24:06

has worked for three

24:09

Democratic presidents, served as

24:11

U.S. Ambassador to Japan

24:13

under Joseph Biden. You

24:31

were back, you were, you were

24:34

in Japan. Yes. As the

24:36

ambassador. And it's still an ally?

24:38

All but a little week ago.

24:41

I was going to say, check

24:43

your phone. Then you come back

24:45

and you recently just took

24:47

a new job. What did you,

24:50

what's your new job? Well, I'm

24:52

doing daily show writing. What's

24:54

your job? Yeah, I'm working with

24:57

Center View and I do write

24:59

for the Washington Post and

25:01

I'm on CNN. I thought you

25:03

worked at an investment bank. Yeah,

25:06

center view. Oh, center view. How's

25:08

that going? When did you join?

25:11

Yeah, about a month ago.

25:13

Uh-huh. And when you got there,

25:15

let me ask a question, when

25:17

you got there, how is

25:19

it going? Well, there's a six-letter

25:22

word that a lot of people

25:24

are saying lately. Terrorists. Terrorists.

25:26

Was this a completely unexpected? I

25:29

mean, he's been talking about tariffs

25:31

forever. It seems like, did your

25:33

bank set aside anything for it?

25:36

Did they know this was

25:38

coming? Did they put, is there

25:40

a basement where they keep things,

25:43

cats? Yeah, yeah. I mean,

25:45

here is, I'm a breed calmly.

25:47

Don't panic, because everything's going to

25:49

be fine. Yeah. 11 weeks

25:51

and 11 trillion dollars out the

25:54

window. Areva dirtie? Shalom. Whoa! Yeah,

25:56

bon by your eyes. Look

25:58

at you. Yeah. And

26:01

we only have 200 more

26:03

weeks to go. Right. Yeah.

26:05

I think a trillion a

26:07

week. Yeah, as my father

26:09

would say, so what to

26:11

go wrong? Yeah. Yeah, it

26:13

takes it very easy. Yeah,

26:15

is this the colonic that

26:17

we need? In your mind.

26:19

Yeah, let me try to

26:21

help you, John. Please. Yeah.

26:23

So I mean, I'm sorry.

26:25

I have a lawn musk

26:27

measure. What does

26:29

that mean? Well, how many kids

26:31

do you have? What does that

26:34

mean? This is supposed to be

26:36

a manufacturing renaissance. A manufacturer is

26:38

going to come back. Screws. Next

26:40

to Applephones, as you said. No,

26:42

no, no, no. We're right. We're

26:44

robots. Alon Musk has a 20,000

26:46

person factory in Shanghai. When those

26:49

get repurposed back of the United

26:51

States, this is an incredible success.

26:53

Until that time, it's an absolute.

26:55

failure. And what is really, I

26:57

mean, on a serious note, also

26:59

driving me absolutely crazy. We had

27:01

China isolated. We had the whole

27:04

world angry at China for exporting

27:06

and destroying their economies, and we

27:08

were going to be their hope

27:10

and dream. We worked on getting

27:12

Japan and Korea to align with

27:14

the United States, isolate China. Now

27:16

they're working their own economic deal,

27:19

and we're isolated. It's really the

27:21

most Japan and South Korea are

27:23

working there now with China So

27:25

we all don't doesn't everybody trade

27:27

with everybody Yes But they were

27:29

but they were actually number one

27:31

foreign investor in the United States

27:34

Japan a million Americans work for

27:36

them one of the biggest manufacturing

27:38

countries that support manufacturing United States

27:40

Japan It's the most reckless thing

27:42

done by a president. I mean

27:44

there is natural disasters human disasters

27:47

there's lightning creates a fire there's

27:49

arson that creates a fire this

27:51

is arson right this is arsonist

27:53

right this is this is amo

27:55

you know I'm going to tell

27:57

you a story. This is really

27:59

the wrong direction to go in,

28:02

but I'm going to do it

28:04

anyway. You look like you're taking...

28:06

I'm thinking of how I can

28:08

do this. I was going to

28:10

bring some McSedrin for you. Exedrin.

28:12

What is this, the 40s? Yeah.

28:14

You're going to give you an

28:17

Exedrin and a Paul Mall. It'll

28:19

be fine. Oh, God's sakes. I

28:21

can give you something McKinley used.

28:23

All right. Here we go. and

28:25

he would eat whatever he could

28:27

find outside and generally things that

28:29

a dog shouldn't eat. I'm worried

28:32

where this is going. He comes

28:34

back into the house, everything's fine.

28:36

And you would go up. In

28:38

the middle of the night, he

28:40

would wake up and he would

28:42

vomit on the bed. I would

28:44

turn the light on and I

28:47

would look to try and go

28:49

get stuff to clean it. Then

28:51

he would eat the vomit and

28:53

then look at me and go,

28:55

I did good, right? Do

28:59

you see what I'm saying?

29:01

Isn't that what disease? Trump,

29:03

I guarantee, here's what's going

29:05

to happen. Trump is going

29:08

to announce he's going to

29:10

eat the vomit and look

29:12

at the country and go,

29:14

huh? He gave, he's giving

29:16

China a get-out-of-jail cart. They

29:18

were in the doghouse with

29:20

everybody. They were isolating all

29:22

their economic problems domestic. all

29:24

over the world. And they

29:26

had a lot. Pretty manufactured

29:28

Malaysia. All over the world.

29:30

Yes, yes. And they were

29:32

isolated. And they were becoming

29:34

a problem for everybody. We're

29:36

going to be the safe

29:38

haven. We've now become the

29:40

problem. We've given them a

29:42

get out of jail cart.

29:44

This is, listen, the way

29:46

I look at it, March

29:48

Madness used to be about

29:51

basketball. Right. Now, it's about

29:53

the Trump administration. Right. You

29:55

used to do brackets. Mine

29:57

was very direct. I don't

29:59

know yours. Now I'm

30:01

thinking about ceding and everything else.

30:03

I'm telling you I'm I'm I've

30:06

literally I've just gonna announce but

30:08

the only thing that I could

30:11

say good about this yeah you

30:13

could you know you see all

30:15

these CEOs on the shows that

30:18

are all now like this is

30:20

crazy this is insane I'm gonna

30:23

I'm gonna say Schmok what took

30:25

you so long I mean I

30:27

cannot believe all these guys running

30:30

around oh it's the largest tax

30:32

increase in American history thank on

30:34

for the American people. They think

30:37

this is horrible. He says I'm

30:39

going to cut. Don't. You listen

30:42

to his people? No, his people.

30:44

I'm talking about the American people.

30:46

Not his people. No, no, no,

30:49

no, no. This is the wrong

30:51

way to look at this. His

30:54

people are literally, they're like. grasp

30:56

in the English language is down

30:58

to four words. Yes, sir, Mr.

31:01

President. His people were the majority

31:03

of the voters in this country.

31:06

I used to, I worked for

31:08

three presidents. I used to be

31:10

six, two. I'm now only five,

31:13

eight. Your job is to go

31:15

in the Oval Office and tell

31:18

them, you're out of your mind.

31:20

Yes, and they go off and

31:22

they repeat all this crap on

31:25

TV. I'm five seven and I

31:27

could dunk on you. Come on,

31:29

let's go. Not

31:34

a chance. So listen to this. I

31:36

play Jewish basketball. It's five days. Jewish

31:38

basketball. That's Wilkes. The Trump is going

31:40

to say what he's going to do

31:43

is go, I just made a deal.

31:45

He did the same thing the last

31:47

time. China just said they're going to

31:49

buy all our pork and all our

31:51

soybeans. It's the best deal. Anybody's ever

31:54

made ever. They don't actually ever do

31:56

it. Nobody ever checks on it. But

31:58

why? But if you wanted to renegotiate

32:00

our trade agreements or create a fair

32:03

system or whatever it is you want

32:05

to do, why would you do it

32:07

in such a reckless fashion? I want

32:09

to go out to your first point.

32:12

Please. In your book here, The Out

32:14

of the Deal, he is the worst

32:16

negotiator. China never bought anything. They took

32:18

him to clean up. North Korea never

32:20

agreed to anything. He negotiated the trade

32:23

deal with Canada and Mexico, and then

32:25

he just blew it up. He's blown

32:27

up his own deal. Yeah. He is

32:29

not a good negotiatorator. The only person,

32:32

when you claim you're a good negotiator,

32:34

is to cover up the fact that

32:36

you're a horrible negotiator. You could have

32:38

done this seven different ways, he picked

32:40

the eighth way. Right. And it's, the

32:43

problem is not just, and you are

32:45

right, he's going to say after Japan

32:47

or after Israel, I got this deal

32:49

and he's going to try to calm

32:52

the markets down, but the fact is

32:54

the damage to America, nobody will ever

32:56

trust us. In eight weeks. He's destroyed

32:58

80 years of reputation that America built,

33:01

all of us collectively, all through all

33:03

the battles. He has destroyed him. Just

33:05

like, just like your dog. He threw

33:07

up on the bed. That was my

33:09

point. That was the point of the

33:12

whole story. Did you miss the point

33:14

of the whole story? That was my

33:16

point. But I wanted to say it

33:18

my way and I feel better for

33:21

being here. Thank you, John. You think

33:23

I just brought that up randomly? No,

33:25

that was... Now let's put that to

33:27

the other side of the coin. Okay.

33:30

Democratic policy has led us in some

33:32

measure to this moment. No, no doubt

33:34

about it. Here's a here, we got

33:36

to own this, here's the fact, which

33:38

is we disappointed the country. Now, they

33:41

will stab you in the back, we

33:43

will disappoint you. And that's just down

33:45

to where it is. And you get

33:47

to pick as the American people. That's

33:50

the choice. That's the good news stuff.

33:52

And we got it. And here's the

33:54

deal. Here's what we do. Didn't you

33:56

want to be the DNC chair? That

33:59

is a terror. Terrible

34:01

bumper sticker. No, you're asking, you know,

34:03

why, we gotta be honest. Yes. When

34:05

you make a mistake, you gotta own

34:08

it. And that's the only way to,

34:10

and here, and here, no, here's, and

34:12

here's, and here's what it is. Yeah.

34:14

We were just talking earlier. Yes. The

34:16

steward kids in the American kids, they're

34:18

gonna be good. Loving home, good education.

34:21

And the American dream, they're gonna get

34:23

a shot at it. Which is a

34:25

shot. And what happened is trying to

34:27

own a home, trying to basically save

34:29

for your retirement, save your kids' education,

34:31

and health care, so you're not in

34:34

the poor house, want sickness away. People

34:36

are missing medications, kids are coming home

34:38

from college, they're living in the basement,

34:40

and the American dream is good for

34:42

only about 10% of kids. That's not

34:45

how we keep score. And we are

34:47

responsible for not keeping things. Can't you

34:49

understand why a percentage of the population

34:51

would be like, burn it down? because

34:53

of what happened both in Iraq war,

34:55

what happened in the financial meltdown. The

34:58

American people lost their lives, their livelihood,

35:00

and the elite let them down. There

35:02

is no doubt that their right to

35:04

be angry. I have no problem with

35:06

some of the people that make up

35:08

the MAGA. They have a right to

35:11

be angry because they've lost faith with

35:13

them. What I have is all these

35:15

other executives who've lived large on America.

35:17

who allow a president to run rough

35:19

shot over the law, who run rough

35:21

shot over America, they have no right

35:24

to that. But that's not owning the

35:26

democratic failure. That's again placing it to

35:28

you. So let's stay with the Democrats.

35:30

The Democrats have a responsibility for what

35:32

they have done with losing faith. You

35:35

can't let Peoria Youngstown. You can't let

35:37

hearts of Wisconsin lacrosse. But we did.

35:39

No, we did. And that's why the

35:41

first thing. Sorry. We owe you, no

35:43

we do. You got, you have to

35:45

get clean with people on what we

35:48

did wrong and worst case scenario, we

35:50

then get sidetracked into side issues rather

35:52

than the main cause, which is the

35:54

American dream. So how would Democrats bring

35:56

that back? The American dream is unaf.

35:58

Right. It's inaccessible. Yes. And that should

36:01

be unacceptable to us. And then number

36:03

two, what you have to do is

36:05

right now is a deal with the

36:07

fundamentals. Okay? No part of America is

36:09

off from being invested or invested in.

36:11

You got to make sure every American

36:14

has a chance at the American dream,

36:16

which means it starts first and foremost

36:18

with education. Even when we didn't, hold

36:20

on, no, don't, wait a second, I

36:22

got one, I got to own that.

36:25

Okay, number two, you own with the

36:27

fact is you got to invest in

36:29

this country and we did not do

36:31

that. We basically let Americans and let

36:33

the Chinese eat their lunch and that's

36:35

not fair. But even when they did

36:38

it, I was talking to Ezra Klein,

36:40

we were talking about rural broadband, billions

36:42

of dollars invested in rural broadband, there

36:44

was a 14 point plan to get

36:46

companies to the starting line. to go

36:48

to build out of all the companies

36:51

that jumped in there. Everybody dropped out

36:53

but three. Nobody got to the starting

36:55

line. By the time their administration was

36:57

over. They invested in green technology. They

36:59

didn't build the electric charging stations. How

37:01

can you go out there and say,

37:04

we need to raise taxes and money

37:06

when people don't believe that you're going

37:08

to spend it? Like, here's what's so

37:10

upsetting about all of this. Trump is

37:12

great at diagnosing the problem. Doge is

37:14

great at telling you we need efficiency.

37:17

I think the way they go about

37:19

it is actually haphazard, cruel, reckless, doesn't

37:21

fix the problem, but they're not wrong

37:23

in the diagnosis. Yeah, you pointed out

37:25

and I have no, I agree with

37:28

you 100% of what we literally, we

37:30

did all the, passing the legislation should

37:32

be hard, not actually getting the resource

37:34

out. On the other hand, let me

37:36

give you one reverse. Can I ask

37:38

you? Is this about a dog? No.

37:41

It's about when the auto industry was

37:43

on their back. And there were literally,

37:45

I remember, as the chief of staff

37:47

for President Obama. And we got a

37:49

notice that there were six weeks left

37:51

before Chrysler and GM are belly up.

37:54

And thousands of jobs and thousands of

37:56

communities were on their back. The United

37:58

States came in and saved it. our

38:00

auto industry came back. So in fact

38:02

there is moments you can point to

38:04

you can't get a charging station you

38:07

go. Even that I'm not saying look

38:09

but let's talk about 2008 for a

38:11

second we did bail out corporations

38:13

yes but people homeowners who went

38:16

under they lost everything so you're

38:18

looking at the guy you're looking

38:20

at the guy a hundred percent It's

38:22

hard for me to go like, oh good.

38:24

You say GM, when all the guys at

38:26

work at GM, lost their f-fills. You're

38:28

looking at the guy. Well, that's actually,

38:31

that's cheap, that's not actually true.

38:33

GM jobs got saved rather than go

38:35

bad. Some people were on your front

38:37

back. Yes, but you're not totally accurate.

38:40

This may be the last time I'm

38:42

asked on the show. But on the second

38:44

thing, here's the thing. We did do, and

38:46

we saved the auto industry from

38:49

going under. And the second thing

38:51

is, on that part, on that

38:53

part, and as somebody who was

38:55

in the White House that advocated

38:57

for Old Testament Justice

38:59

on bankers, because they should have

39:02

been put into the public square

39:04

and literally had the crap beat

39:06

out of them, because they were

39:08

asking for bonuses when people were

39:10

losing their home. And I, and

39:12

I, no. And they're like, beat

39:14

them! With them! Actually, to be on

39:16

all fairness, it wasn't the oval. Put

39:19

them in a stockade! It wasn't the

39:21

oval office within the Roosevelt room. Yeah,

39:23

they should be beaten up because they're

39:25

sitting there asking for their bonuses. as if

39:27

they earned a bonus when people

39:29

lost their homes, their livelihood, and

39:31

their life savings. That's right. And

39:33

that is where we lost faith

39:35

in the Iraq war, which is

39:37

built on deception, the liars loan

39:40

that lost people in their homes,

39:42

it was built on deception, and

39:44

then you got COVID coming around

39:46

and the Democrats sat around and

39:48

acted like they were something else.

39:50

Do you ever watch what this

39:53

president is doing and think? And this is

39:55

what he used to yell at me about. I used to have to, I don't

39:57

know if you were there when I used to have to go down there and

39:59

he would yell at me. for a while. I was

40:01

one that called you. Okay. So

40:03

when he was with you, I

40:05

got free time and I actually

40:07

got both. Is that true? All

40:09

right. So do you watch what

40:11

this president does in terms of

40:13

at least the boldness of it, not

40:16

what he's doing, and think, why

40:18

didn't we push the edge and

40:20

get the things that we thought

40:22

rather than getting, if we ran

40:24

on the audacity of hope, why

40:26

did we govern on the possible?

40:28

Is that something? The

40:31

answer is in the Tamurikwai yes and

40:33

no. Okay, and I'll tell you why.

40:36

No, yes, I was like, I feel,

40:38

no, no, I feel, I feel like,

40:40

don't ever say that again. Okay, I'll

40:42

have to give you this hand. I

40:45

understand. This hand. I understand. I understand.

40:47

No, no, I feel like, don't ever

40:49

say that again. Okay. Or I'll have

40:51

to give you. I'll have a look

40:53

over. I like, like, I like, we

40:56

were schmox. We were idiots for doing

40:58

this. On the other hand, nobody would

41:00

ever have had an ethics problem in

41:02

the Obama White House. We did follow

41:05

the rules of law. America was respected

41:07

around the world, and we did create

41:09

jobs. So did we follow it and

41:11

say, oh, we should have done it

41:14

audaciously like this and break over? No,

41:16

because as many. What would you have

41:18

done though if you could? Oh, that's

41:20

going to do. We have to do

41:22

three more shows. No, but I say

41:25

two. You know my presidency is a

41:27

marathon and I hand over the patent

41:29

to somebody else to pick up I

41:31

actually think he left America better than

41:34

the one he inherited from President Bush

41:36

in a whole host of ways I

41:38

don't agree with everything and then you

41:40

look at this no I don't wish

41:43

we did this and I'm glad we

41:45

didn't do this did was it constraining

41:47

yes but leaving here literally walking around

41:49

saying huh it will be a recession

41:52

what do you need a 401k for

41:54

no and then I mean to to

41:56

to push things in a way that

41:58

didn't follow pushed a number of people

42:00

known for that. I'm asking you this

42:03

question. There are things there's no doubt

42:05

like what they're about to do. Let's

42:07

take this on the budget and say,

42:09

well, five trillion dollars in the tax

42:12

that doesn't cost anything. Well, I'm sorry,

42:14

any kid in third grade math, even

42:16

post COVID, knows what five trillion dollars

42:18

does call this stuff. Okay? I mean,

42:21

give me a break. So when they

42:23

sit there and do all this. I'm

42:25

just going through the list. I know,

42:27

but I'm only here for 20 minutes.

42:29

I want the bankers beaten. I want

42:32

the dumb children removed. Now wait a

42:34

second. I think the American people agree

42:36

with me about bankers getting beaten. No,

42:38

they're not vigilant. No, it's a cheap

42:41

high. I know, but I'm only here

42:43

for 20 minutes, so it feels pretty

42:45

good. Okay, but here's a note. The

42:47

thing is, do I feel like I

42:50

could, back to your original question? Do

42:52

I feel like we should have done

42:54

certain things like this? Yeah, but that

42:56

for a guy I believe in the

42:58

end of the day following the rules

43:01

playing by the rules is better for

43:03

the country than trying to ultimately Not

43:05

just ultimately also at the time. There

43:07

are definitely frustrating things There are things

43:10

that I look what I will say

43:12

this is you look at like what

43:14

they did on the courts and how

43:16

they stacked them versus we've kind of

43:19

the way we did it in a

43:21

sense of the process full background checks

43:23

etc You could have pushed, you could

43:25

have, no doubt, pushed that much harder

43:27

and much faster. No doubt about it.

43:30

And so if you were going to,

43:32

we'll leave it at this, the final

43:34

advice, you're a guy that's been in

43:36

the Oval Office a few times, the

43:39

Democrats are in the wilderness. I'm assuming

43:41

that whoever is going to be the

43:43

next leader of the emaker party is

43:45

going to come from the wilderness, like

43:48

it usually does. Clinton came out of

43:50

nowhere. And what would you want them

43:52

to be? Not

43:55

no, here's what I would say

43:57

on a serious note. I do want

43:59

them. I want them Not part of

44:02

Washington. I want them to have governed.

44:04

I want them to be a true

44:06

change agent. I want them to understand

44:09

one thing. The biggest thing we have

44:11

to do is restore the credibility and

44:13

trust with the American people. Competence. It's

44:16

more than competence. Competence counts, but that's

44:18

not, it's not what keeps you up.

44:20

The fair deal, the new deal, the

44:23

new frontier was not about competence.

44:25

It was about having a vision

44:27

in America, holding America to that North

44:29

Star. And that... Give me three people

44:31

that you would call on to

44:33

write that vision, to have that

44:35

vision, to help you with that vision,

44:38

to be that vision. Three? Three? Okay.

44:40

I got six for you. Okay.

44:42

Here, hold on, let me give

44:45

you this. I'm writing it down.

44:47

You got it? You want this

44:49

one? It's better. It's a little

44:51

better on that one. Yeah. Okay.

44:53

Hey, John, your dog was playing

44:55

with that beforehand. All right. Okay,

44:58

six. Okay. Governor of Pennsylvania. Shapiro.

45:00

You're just talking about the... Yeah,

45:02

you asked me who... But these

45:04

are the usual... Okay, so you're

45:06

saying it's going to come from

45:08

the... Well, the governor. The sheer,

45:10

Whitmer... Look, Gavin Newsom... The one

45:13

constant in American history is, governors

45:15

have been the most likely to

45:17

make it to Washington because they

45:19

bring change. Both parties, Ronald Reagan,

45:21

George Bush, Jimmy Carter, Bill Clinton.

45:23

You go to the Woodrow Wilson,

45:25

Franklin, Delano Roosevelt. Governors are your

45:28

most likely change. Would you give

45:30

them. No, I

45:32

wouldn't because I think that you actually

45:34

have to have you know the currency

45:36

you work on in politics is politics

45:38

And if you don't have experience in

45:41

it. No, and I do think governors

45:43

bring change people that have understand But

45:45

the most important thing to me is

45:47

can you articulate that vision that takes

45:49

America out of this wilderness to a

45:52

better thing because when you're done when

45:54

you're done with this It's going to

45:56

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over $35. That's our talk for tonight. Before

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your host for the rest of the week.

48:19

Science News, John, just

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this week, researchers using

48:24

fossilized DNA have brought

48:27

back dire wolves from

48:29

extinction. Very exciting. Aren't

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those the game of

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Thrones? Wolves? The dire...

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That does sound a

48:39

little risky. Oh, doesn't...

48:41

Does it sound a

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little risky? Oh. I

48:46

don't want giant dire

48:48

wolves or a tearex

48:51

with guns for arms.

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the week will fail

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John. I don't want

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a T-Rex with guns

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for arms. I don't

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want a T-Rex with

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you're being a real

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being two P-words John.

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Fair enough. Does he lie to

49:21

everybody? Here it is, your moment

49:23

is that. The Dodgers face down

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adversity, you entered the playoffs, battered

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and bruised, but not broken. When

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you ran out the healthy arms,

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you ran out of really healthy,

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they had great arms, but they

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ran out. It's called sports, it's

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called baseball in particular. Explore more

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shows from the Daily Show podcast

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