Episode Transcript
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0:01
You're listening to Comedy Central. Are
0:04
you a busy person who's always on the go, This
0:07
next podcast is for you. No
0:10
bull, no filler, just
0:13
news and analysis that's straight to
0:15
the points. No beating around the bush,
0:17
no wasting your time, no
0:20
repetition. We know you're a busy
0:22
person who's always on the go. This next
0:24
podcast is for you. Buckle
0:26
your seatbelts. Daisie Leda and Michael Costa
0:28
present Podcast Today.
0:42
Hello, and welcome to Podcast Today,
0:44
where we cut through the noise and bring you real
0:46
talk about what's happening today.
0:49
I'm Dassie, I'm Michael Costa.
0:51
Before we get to today's episode, some quick
0:53
housekeeping. Thursday's pod will
0:56
be released at six pm instead of
0:58
one pm because I have to take my dog to
1:00
the dentist. Also a little more housekeeping. Friday's
1:02
show is a listener mail bag, sending
1:04
those questions to Pod Today letters
1:07
at mind spring dot email. One
1:09
last bit of housekeeping, Thursday's
1:11
pod will be at one pm again, my dog
1:13
no longer has a cavity. Terrific. Turns
1:16
out my dog didn't have a cavity, he just stated sharpie.
1:18
We should also mention tickets are now on sale
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to our live shows in Oklahoma
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City, Minneapolis, and Hartford. Right
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use code. I'm with Podcasts and Antonio,
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Jacksonville, Biloxi, Philadelphia.
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Right and you can useroite Miami,
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Green Bay, Providence, Atlanta,
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Chesapeake, Fresno, Norfolk
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and boise Is at all can I announce the code?
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Now? Use code? I'm with Papolis,
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St. Louis and Providence. We'll
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see you as soon. Use code. I'm with podcast
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for two percent off early bird tickets forgot
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to mention Branson, Missouri. We're also going to
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be in Branson, Missouri. Just
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a reminder that you should follow at podcast
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Today on Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn,
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Facebook, TikTok, Interest, my Space,
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friend and of course the weightlifting
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forums. This
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episode of Podcast Today is brought to you by
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shrimp Fix. Every week, shrimp Fix
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bucket of tartar sauce. Before
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we get started, we have an exciting announcement about
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a new partnership. Podcast
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Today is teaming up with the good folks at vote
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spake dot org for a great project.
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Here's the deal. Ahead of the election, votes
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bank dot org and Podcast Today are going to
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make polling sites brand spanking
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new. That's right, DESI. We're going to renovate
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gyms, abandoned circuit cities, anywhere
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votes are going to be cast. No more polling
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places will be closed because of raccoon investations.
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Unlike the last time, all you have to do to
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participate is go to vote spank dot
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address, income level, to show up in some
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Bring some work gloves, a ski mask, and
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twenty feet of nautical grade rope, and you're
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all set. Let's spank this election.
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we can make democracy brands spanking
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new. You
3:46
know, I think it's time to introduce our guest. Yeah,
3:48
that's right. He's a correspondent for The Daily
3:50
Show with Trevor Noah Jabooky Young White.
3:53
Thanks so much for having me. You know,
3:55
the studio is a lot smaller than I thought it would be.
4:04
Now, Jabouky, before we talk shop,
4:06
you have a book to promote. Yes, well,
4:08
it's actually more like a Twitter account.
4:11
It's my Twitter account at jubooky
4:13
Cool and where can our listeners find your Twitter
4:15
account on Twitter? Fantastic. I can't wait
4:17
to read it. Before we get to Jabouky.
4:20
We just have a little more housekeeping. Podcast
4:22
Today is looking for new theme music.
4:25
So if you're an amateur composer and you want to
4:27
compose our theme song for free, you
4:29
can submit your compositions at podcast
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Today Music at prodigy dot
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net. Just a few guidelines. Your
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theme song has to be original, it has to be
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less than thirty seconds. You must
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include a flu there can't be any screams
4:42
in the background, and it must be in a frequency
4:44
that sends marine life into a frenzy.
4:46
Lyrics cannot include slurs against
4:48
Macedonians or terms, but they must
4:50
include at least two references to Sigourney
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Weaver. Get those submissions in. Guys
4:55
can't wait to hear that? Okay. We want to remind our listeners
4:57
to check out our sister pod Podcast
4:59
Today This week. This
5:01
week. On Podcast Today this week, we'll have
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some amazing guests including Montana
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governor and former presidential candidate
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Steve Bullock. Is he related to Sandra
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Bullock? That's what we're going to find out? Tune
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in. You know what what I was thinking if Sandra Bullock were
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the first lady she turned the White House into
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the lake House. You know what I'm saying. I
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don't think I do. What does that mean? You know?
5:22
The lake House two thousand
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six, Kanu Reeves and Sandra
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Bullock exchange love letters through mysterious
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time space portal inside of a lake house's mailbox.
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dedicated to Claire Danes. Use Claire Space.
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We have thousands of different templates you can
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serious if you're trying to make the website about muffins
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or something. Then your computer will crash and give you a virus.
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Claire Space, because Claire Danes is a
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national treasure. Cassie, you use Claire
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my internet tribute to it broke down Palace Claire
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Space. If you make a website about Jennifer
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Love Hewett, you're gonna get malware. And now
6:05
it's time to get to the point.
6:10
As always. Get to the Point is sponsored
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by Henry's Rusty Shave Club. Henry's
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That ad for Henry's Rusty Shave Club is
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sponsored by buck Banger, the fastest,
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easiest way to send money, Costa, use
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buck banger this week? Sure it did so
6:58
Monday, I went to the movies with my buddy. We
7:00
saw Aladdin again wrapping
7:02
Genie. I can't help it anyway,
7:04
We get the tickets, We see the movie. It's magical,
7:07
and on the way out of the parking lot, I run over a
7:09
rare bird. A rare bird, yeah,
7:11
and I rebuild woodpecker crazy
7:13
endangered, huge fine for turning it into
7:16
a road bandcake. So naturally I opened
7:18
my wallet to buy the silence of all the witnesses.
7:20
But oh, I spent my last Jackson.
7:22
I'm Mr Will Smith's heartwarming and humorous
7:25
two or to force. So what do I do?
7:27
I opened the buck banger app send fifty
7:29
dollar bribes to everyone who saw me do it, and
7:31
I'm home by dinner time googling when is Aladdin
7:33
to coming out? By the way, the answer not
7:36
soon enough, Costa.
7:39
You just confess to a crime. What
7:42
the crime of loving Aladdin? If that's
7:44
a crime, then lock me up in solitary
7:46
confinement, preferably with a blu ray
7:48
of Will Smith's Aladdin. Buck
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Banger the easiest way to send money.
7:57
All right, let's get to the point. But before we do,
8:00
we need to address something we said on Monday's
8:02
show. Let's take a list, and
8:09
it's Monday, and before we get started, we have
8:11
some housekeeping, right Tuesday's
8:13
show where we push back to three pm instead
8:15
of one pm. I have to be home at one pm to get
8:17
my latest shipment from shrimp Fix. Hey,
8:20
is it bad if hypothetically a dog
8:22
eats a sharpie? Just
8:26
some housekeeping on that bit of housekeeping. Tuesday's
8:28
show was actually released at three pm
8:31
instead of three instead of one because
8:33
we had more housekeeping than we anticipated, and just
8:35
a bit more housekeeping. We are aiming to have
8:38
less housekeeping going forward. That's
8:40
right, Fewer housekeeping,
8:43
fewer housekeepings. Guys. By the way,
8:45
it's actually houses keeping like Attorneys
8:48
General or acep's Rocky, just
8:50
so you know. And now let's get
8:53
to the point. Quick
8:57
reminder if you like, get to the point as well.
9:00
Other great podcast Today segments like check
9:02
this out, is this real Life? It's only
9:04
Tuesday, and that just happened? Rate
9:06
and Reviewer, Rate and Reviewer, Rate and review
9:09
us on Apple podcast, Stitcher, Spotify,
9:11
Breaker pod Squad, Hewlett Packer,
9:13
Pods, Prodigy, Copy Serve cast and
9:16
earth link Dot website, backslash podcast,
9:18
backslash reviews, backslash backslash,
9:21
and just to clarify because there's been some
9:23
confusion, that's the backslash
9:25
symbol followed by the word backslash.
9:28
If you end that U r L with two backslash
9:30
symbols, it sends you to a pretty out their website.
9:33
It's real jarring stuff actually.
9:35
Anyway, those reviews really help us out. They
9:37
boost our rankings, which allow us to be discovered
9:39
by more people, and they also can serve as
9:41
powerful character statements for us during core proceedings.
9:44
Canty. By the way, shout out to listener
9:46
David the dave Man eighteen your
9:48
reviews saying we were quote awesome help
9:50
me get back custody of my kids. Can
9:52
I go now? Or do you guys want me to weigh
9:55
in on something? No, we're
9:57
ready for you, Yeah, sure are. Our guest today
9:59
is Jabooky young White jabookey. How are you doing?
10:02
You know? I'm pretty good. I'm doing pretty good and
10:04
I just wanted to throw in there. My appearance
10:06
today is brought to you by just the Packaging.
10:09
Do you love coming home to something that you ordered
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online, but you don't have the money to buy lots
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of ship Well, just packaging.
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We'll ship you a big box of tissue, paper,
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bubble wrap and all that other stuff that's
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so fun to open. And that's it. No
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meals to cook, no clothes to try on and send
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back, It's just the packaging.
10:27
Thanks. Before we move on, we've
10:30
got some sad personnel news we
10:32
do. This
10:39
is Michael Costa's final episode of Podcast
10:42
Today. Wait was I
10:44
fired? We are super excited
10:46
about our permanent new host, jabouky
10:49
Young. Why what's up?
10:52
I'm super excited to break down all the issues
10:55
of the day with y'alla Costa. Can you please
10:57
get your ship out of your office now? You can still
11:00
send to Michael cost in our brand new international
11:02
sister pod podcast Today Kosovo.
11:05
Up to the date news and commentary life
11:07
from the Balkans Kosovo, Kosovo
11:09
like the country, just read the paper? Hello
11:14
Podcast Today Kosovo Fans.
11:17
Tickets are now on sale for our live shows
11:19
in Sarajevo to brev nick Chernobyl,
11:22
buch Arest and Northern Czechnia.
11:24
Use code hollow Kosovo for twenties
11:27
ladles off and so I don't even have a passport.
11:29
By the way, a bit of housekeeping. There is now
11:31
an emergency bonus pod
11:34
for our Titanium tier supporters
11:36
on Patriots That's right. Head to our fan page
11:38
right now to hear an exclusive five
11:41
alarm bonus pod that features our extended
11:43
interview with Podcast Today Kosovo host
11:45
Michael Costa, who will have secretly infiltrated
11:48
a Chechen terrorist group people
11:50
point of order? Please has the
11:52
new a Laddin even been released in Kosovo?
11:55
Podcast Today is produced by Tom Baylor
11:57
and Schula Mansfield and recorded at daily
11:59
shows toos in the heart of Manhattan's Little
12:01
Belgrade. Trevor Noah is our managing
12:03
editor. Our research is provided by Miroslav
12:06
Berkovich and bogged On Drakovich.
12:08
Our audio engineer is Petra Mstorovich.
12:11
Legal services provided by the law firm of
12:16
and Eamma Loosovich.
12:18
A man known only as the Scorpion
12:21
is our lookout and unsuspecting uber
12:23
driver named Cynthia is our wheelman,
12:26
and laundry and pet sitting is handled by Zivko
12:29
Vuillardino. Our fabulous
12:31
interns are Greg Rasputin, Lizzie board
12:33
In, the third and Lyle Menendez
12:35
Costa. I want to leave us with any parting words.
12:37
Yeah, actually I just google
12:40
and Aladdin is not in Kosovo
12:42
right now. There's no doesn't seem to be any showtimes
12:45
or movie theaters. This is kind of what keeps
12:47
me grounded. And you
12:50
have nothing to say now both you guess
12:52
you could wait for it to show up on Prime
12:54
and now you're the fucking host all of a sudden. I
12:56
mean, you didn't even know,
12:59
you didn't even know that you were going to be the host.
13:02
But but here's
13:04
a hard work and then you see what the right well,
13:07
you know, I stepped up to the plate, and I think maybe
13:09
that could be a part of the reason pronounced Janovich.
13:12
M m
13:15
h, m
13:46
m m h.
13:53
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