Self-Serving Lies, Ranch vs. Caesar Debate Club, and a Recipe

Self-Serving Lies, Ranch vs. Caesar Debate Club, and a Recipe

Released Thursday, 6th March 2025
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Self-Serving Lies, Ranch vs. Caesar Debate Club, and a Recipe

Self-Serving Lies, Ranch vs. Caesar Debate Club, and a Recipe

Self-Serving Lies, Ranch vs. Caesar Debate Club, and a Recipe

Self-Serving Lies, Ranch vs. Caesar Debate Club, and a Recipe

Thursday, 6th March 2025
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

This This episode is brought

0:02

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0:58

We're going to do a quick

1:00

musing about the lies. I tell

1:02

myself, and I'm pretty sure you

1:04

tell yourself, definitely Chris, he ain't

1:06

tells himself. Then we're going to

1:08

do a debate club. We haven't

1:10

done one in a while. And if

1:12

you're a fan of ranch dressing

1:14

or Caesar dressing, brace yourself.

1:16

Because we're going to declare a

1:19

winner. One will die and you'll never be

1:21

able to eat it ever again. Because

1:23

it'll be such a definitive

1:25

argument. And I even know

1:27

which one I'm going to do it yet. And

1:29

then we're going to do a moeiff. And

1:31

then I will finish it off with an

1:34

actual recipe that we talked about, but I

1:36

didn't really get into. All right, let's get

1:38

on to the show. Welcome to the Dave Chang

1:40

Show, part of the Ringer Podcast Network,

1:42

presented by major domain media. Thank you

1:44

a lot. Ten was always. You can

1:47

watch this on our YouTube channel at

1:49

the Dave Chang show. And you can.

1:51

Sign up for our Discord channel and

1:53

sign up for all the things we

1:55

do on YouTube and Spotify. Yeah,

1:57

before we get in, I think this

1:59

might... be a little bit of break. I'm not

2:01

sure because I'm not sure what's going to happen

2:03

tomorrow. I'm getting surgery. I wasn't expecting

2:06

it. I heard this over the holidays

2:08

at X -rays in Japan. Solved

2:11

doctors here and they

2:13

were like, oh, it's most likely

2:15

a bone bruise. Then insurance in

2:17

this country sucks. I don't know

2:19

why I waited so long. I

2:21

should have just paid for it

2:23

myself and I want to do

2:25

just paying for it myself. And

2:27

turned out I got quite few

2:29

tears on my shoulder. I fell

2:31

down on my shoulder on some

2:33

ice and now it makes sense

2:36

why it hurts the way it does. The

2:38

one that's disgusting is my bicep

2:41

is separated off. And I realize that

2:43

it has to happen now because

2:45

the longer I wait, the more difficult

2:47

it is to repair. So going

2:49

under the knife will be, yeah,

2:53

we'll see. I think more specifically just

2:55

when you're younger, all you hear from

2:57

older people is take care of your

2:59

health, take care of your health. And

3:01

without a doubt turning 45, how old

3:03

are you now? 42. Yeah.

3:05

Okay, get ready. I

3:07

know it's coming. It's already started. It's

3:10

amazing how

3:13

rapid things are just falling

3:15

apart. So yeah,

3:17

just as like a PSA.

3:20

If you can take care of yourself now,

3:22

you should start taking care of yourself. I

3:24

mean, nobody's going to listen. It's like you

3:26

didn't listen. No one's going to listen. We

3:28

didn't listen. I mean, I didn't even listen

3:30

after my neck surgery. So I think that's

3:32

just the way it goes. But you know,

3:35

I'm grateful and hopefully it's

3:38

a quick recovery because we're trying

3:40

to thread the needle with

3:42

some other stuff that we have in

3:44

the works. Undoubtedly, it was always going

3:46

to be, it's an extended recovery time.

3:48

So it's always going to be tough,

3:50

but you know, yeah, it

3:53

sucks. It does suck, man. It

3:56

sucks. And also it's like you kind of had

3:58

to make a decision quickly and just go for it.

4:00

So, instead of telling people that I

4:02

fell on my shoulder on ice,

4:04

trying to go skiing with my

4:06

family in Japan, which I never

4:08

even got to do, because I

4:10

did it right when I got

4:12

out of the car, to the

4:14

hotel, I'm going to tell the

4:17

world I did it hurting myself,

4:19

playing fantasy football. Just like a

4:21

real football player. Why won't you

4:23

accept my trade? Or like, went

4:25

to press the mouse and I...

4:27

It went to bid on a

4:29

player too quickly. But that's not

4:31

why we're here talking on this

4:33

pod. You know, more and more

4:35

we're going to start doing some

4:37

random musings. And I was thinking

4:40

to myself on a walk, which

4:42

I'm doing now, because now I'm

4:44

not even allowed to run again.

4:46

So our major demo running thing

4:48

is going to take a hiatus.

4:50

So here I go walking again

4:52

on a lot. And you know

4:54

what? I'm grateful that I'm doing

4:56

this because ideas are coming to

4:58

me in a way that they

5:01

hadn't before. So I'm waking up

5:03

around 5 in the morning, usually

5:05

getting a better 5.20, keeping my

5:07

phone out in the kitchen, and

5:09

I'm getting better sleep. But getting

5:11

the schedule has been really good

5:13

for it. Like ideas, ideas that

5:15

I can talk about here. And

5:17

one of the things I've been

5:19

repeating in my head is, man,

5:21

I lied to myself. a lot.

5:24

Like I'm a pathological liar, maybe

5:26

in real life to other people,

5:28

but certainly to myself. And what

5:30

I mean by that is, it's

5:32

almost always in the territory of

5:34

food, right? What I mean by

5:36

that is, I think one that

5:38

most people might be able to

5:40

relate to, and let's just say,

5:42

I decide I'm going to get,

5:45

you know, a Samita, you know,

5:47

or some tacos, or some tacos,

5:49

or... I'm going to get the

5:51

chips and the guacamole and then

5:53

I'll get a dessert or I'm

5:55

at a fast food restaurant. I

5:57

think the most common... thing is

5:59

I'm gonna get a diet coke

6:01

or I'm gonna get water I'm

6:03

just gonna get a glass of

6:05

water. Honestly that 600 800 calories

6:07

from the soda is like not

6:10

gonna be the difference. Right. Most

6:12

people are, do you have that experience?

6:14

100% fast food it's like let me

6:16

get the the quarter pounder to

6:18

some chicken nuggets too or I get

6:20

two cheeseburgers and then oh what do

6:23

you want to drink with that? Just

6:25

water. Yeah but like that's to me

6:27

I think the standard lie. Sure. But

6:29

I've really dialed in the fact

6:31

that I lied to myself all

6:34

the time. It's actually crazy

6:36

when I think about it.

6:38

And it's almost always food

6:40

related. I bought salad to

6:43

make salad. And I bought a

6:45

mixed green box. I also have

6:47

some lettuce that I bought

6:49

from the farmers market two

6:52

weeks ago. That is literally

6:54

never going to be eaten.

6:56

But I'm like maybe it won't mold

6:58

maybe it won't turn into water

7:00

This is so funny and not

7:02

only that That box of lettuce that

7:05

I bought that I told myself

7:07

you should buy this because you're

7:09

gonna make salad It's a constant

7:11

reminder. I don't know why I'm

7:14

doing this to myself. It's a

7:16

constant reminder that nobody in my

7:18

family is gonna eat this and

7:21

I'm also not gonna eat this And

7:23

I don't know why I'm doing this

7:25

I have a full-on plastic clamshell

7:27

of sludge in my refrigerator just

7:30

right now. I don't know why

7:32

I keep on buying carrots and

7:34

baby carrots. I got generations of

7:36

baby carrots in my veg drawer

7:38

and I'm like, I'll eat this.

7:40

It's time to buy a new

7:42

one because the other one's old,

7:44

so I'm going to eat the

7:46

new one because I have

7:48

starting carrots now. You know how mental

7:50

that is? I'm literally registering, like I

7:52

gotta buy a new one because the

7:54

one that I promised myself before that

7:56

I was gonna buy is now like

7:59

literally turned into care. leather and

8:01

this time it's going to

8:03

be different. What

8:05

happens to carrots

8:07

in the crisper drawer

8:09

is a really sad thing. The

8:12

reason you also buy

8:14

them is they last forever

8:16

and I just I got

8:18

to stop this line to

8:21

myself. I'm not going to

8:23

buy I'm not going to

8:25

eat that ice cream

8:27

that's for the kids. Sometimes

8:30

abiding by Kito rules is just

8:32

as good as going Kito. No

8:34

bread today. Like one meal the

8:36

day. I don't have bread. Immediately

8:38

you broke your promise to

8:40

yourself. It's no different than

8:42

when you like are younger and you're

8:45

praying to a higher being like

8:47

I'm never gonna do this again if

8:49

you help me with this. Jobus, you

8:51

help me. This curveball. I'll never blah

8:54

blah blah. It's the same shit. Yeah.

8:56

And I'm tired of like literally. I'll

8:58

eat those leftovers tomorrow. Wrong. They're

9:00

never going to be in

9:03

the fridge. And here's the problem.

9:05

So we had mini kebab. Nobody

9:07

was eating the leftovers. I have

9:09

all this lavash, which I will get

9:11

to at the end of the podcast,

9:14

which is a real recipe. I

9:16

was like, I'm going to utilize

9:18

the lavash in ways. So I made

9:20

myself a little omelet, but I'm also

9:22

trying to eat less keto. You know

9:24

what I told myself? It's

9:27

lavash. I

9:29

am so crazy. This is crazy.

9:31

And I'll finish it on this.

9:33

I don't know if anyone else

9:36

feels like you have to eat

9:38

more metatrating. You gotta

9:40

do it. And I'm

9:42

literally now just telling myself,

9:44

like, I am so crazy.

9:46

This is crazy. And what I'll

9:48

finish it on this. I don't

9:50

know if anyone else feels this

9:53

way. So I have this box

9:55

of pork kebabs. on a better rice and I

9:57

was like I'm not gonna eat the rice I'm just gonna have

9:59

that that chart tomato and the jalapeno

10:01

and some of the hummus and I'm

10:04

gonna dip those carrots that I bought

10:06

in that hummus. This is what I'm

10:08

telling myself as I'm taking it out

10:10

and it's also a box while I

10:12

love many people I don't love eating

10:15

leftovers and now I'm so deeply unhappy

10:17

because no one else ate it so

10:19

I'm forcing myself to eat leftovers so

10:21

now I'm not happy about it. And

10:23

then I proceed to lie to myself

10:25

and I eat all the fucking rice.

10:28

The biggest lie you just skipped over

10:30

though, which is a very real lie

10:32

that I tell myself all the

10:34

time, which is me eating these

10:36

leftovers is a noble act. It

10:39

is important that I eat these

10:41

leftovers. It's the definition of a

10:43

subcost. And I'm doing exactly that.

10:46

It's like, what am I doing?

10:48

You know who would eat this? You know,

10:50

my dog. I'm just, I'm not

10:52

a leftover person. Can I, I'm

10:55

just gonna, just no, I'm out

10:57

of the closet. I'm gonna say

10:59

it. I fucking hate left. I

11:01

fucking hate left. And I know

11:03

it goes every, it goes against

11:06

everything that I hold dear about

11:08

food, right? But like, I

11:10

don't consider, you know, I

11:12

have some beef nood soup, Taiwanese

11:14

beef noodle soup. And I keep

11:17

on looking at it. I can make

11:19

some. Like noodles and I

11:21

can make a nice meal whatever I

11:23

can cook that for my I'm just

11:25

like look at it and it's there

11:27

and it's a constant reminder

11:30

that You're gonna eat this and

11:32

as you said it's a noble thing

11:34

I What am I doing how long will

11:36

you leave? I'm with you. How long

11:38

will you leave that left over in

11:40

the fridge? Just as a pen

11:42

of knowing you're never need it.

11:44

It doesn't make I'm just going

11:47

to like So flagellate myself

11:49

when I have to throw it away

11:51

forever and it bothers me as a

11:53

personal rule I Understand the

11:55

contradiction or maybe you don't like

11:58

I hate throwing food away So

12:00

the line to myself is causing this

12:02

and I'm like I can I'm the

12:04

root of all this I could just

12:06

stop buying it because you know what

12:09

I realized? My kids don't eat my

12:11

cooking right now You know what I

12:13

mean? I mean they do but like

12:15

I'm buying ingredients that they're wasteful. Yeah,

12:17

yeah, they aren't gonna. Yeah, I'm just

12:19

gonna I feel you why am I

12:21

buying them yogurt? What why am I

12:23

buying bananas? They fucking hate bananas You

12:25

know what I mean? It's like, this

12:28

time they're gonna like the bananas. It's

12:30

wishful thinking. You know, it's wishful thinking.

12:32

They're gonna eat the Brussels sprouts. But

12:34

the bananas is a real problem. Yeah,

12:36

I know. I know. I know. I

12:38

know. I know. And then like the

12:40

thing is like, I'll never eat those

12:42

bananas either. The lies have to stop.

12:44

I understand the... The paradox contradiction and

12:46

the hypocrisy. The mendaciousness. Ooh. I like,

12:49

I, for anybody out there who's like,

12:51

come on. If you tell me you

12:53

don't do it, fuck you, because that's

12:55

a lie. No, but I want to

12:57

say, yeah, because if you're saying you

12:59

don't do this, that's a lie. But

13:01

also, I want to respond to anybody

13:03

who's like, come on Dave, like don't

13:05

beat yourself up, like this, it's fine.

13:07

No. No more. No more, the lies,

13:10

the lies, the lies, stop, stop, stop

13:12

now. I'm a compulsive liar to myself

13:14

about food and it's got to stop.

13:16

It has to stop. I have to

13:18

hold myself accountable through the fucking lies

13:20

I tell myself. Yeah, it's funny man.

13:22

You're totally right. The lies, the lies,

13:24

the lies go deep. Oh, you didn't

13:26

ever lie to yourself. Oh, I, yeah.

13:29

Well, though, your voice just quivered. Oh,

13:31

I was trying, I was gonna try

13:33

to say that there are moments where

13:35

I feel like I'm finally embracing honesty.

13:37

It's not, you don't need to eat

13:39

this leftover. It's not gonna help anybody.

13:41

If you put it in the compost

13:43

bin, it's fine. It's not that.

13:45

me stopping lying to

13:47

myself is like,

13:50

I know I'm going

13:52

to eat this

13:54

and I know I'm

13:56

going to feel

13:58

bad and I'm going

14:00

to do it

14:02

anyway, which I would

14:04

also like to

14:06

stop. I'm

14:09

going to try, I'm going to try to lie and

14:11

you should ask yourself what lies you tell yourself

14:13

about food. You know

14:15

what? Here's the deal. You can

14:17

send it in to ask Dave

14:19

at majordomoemedia.com. We'd love to hear

14:21

the lies you tell yourself about

14:23

food. How about that? Nice. Well

14:26

done. Voice memo too. Voice memo.

14:28

30 second voice memo. No. Just

14:31

write it in. Let's take

14:33

a break. When we get

14:35

back, we're going to talk

14:37

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15:12

right, folks. We

15:15

usually have more people on the Bay Club, but

15:18

we need somebody be able to determine a

15:20

winner though. I think I think it'll be

15:22

self -evident. Okay. What

15:25

is it? Producers, who's got

15:27

what? Because Ying and I are going

15:29

to debate which salad dressing is better

15:31

in true debate club style. Right?

15:34

Who's defending what? Dave, you

15:37

defend ranch. Chris, you

15:40

defend Caesar dressing. You

15:42

want to trade? It's up to

15:44

you. You want it? You want Caesar?

15:46

I want Caesar because I think it's

15:48

the more difficult stance. Okay. You want

15:50

Caesar because it's the more difficult stance.

15:52

So the global salad dressing market,

15:55

$80 billion

15:57

USD in 2020.

15:59

We might be working on

16:01

salad chestings because

16:03

that number is so big.

16:06

The Momoku CPG team. But

16:08

because of those conversations

16:10

that we've had, and

16:12

this is something that may

16:14

or may not happen, but

16:16

you have these ideation sessions

16:19

with the team, you just don't

16:21

realize like how much. Ranch

16:24

and Caesar. I would imagine that Ranch

16:26

and Caesar are the one and two

16:29

in the world. There are many

16:31

many flavors of ranch dressing. I

16:33

think that Ranch is the most

16:35

popular by far number one. I

16:37

don't have to check. Developed

16:40

in the 60s by Mr. Steve

16:42

Henson in the 50s. I'm impressed.

16:44

Nice job Steve Steve Steve Steve

16:46

Henson. I'm impressed. Nice

16:48

job Steve Steve Steve Steve. Nice

16:51

job Steve Steve Steve. I'm impressed.

16:53

And then Clorox bought, of all

16:55

the companies, Clorox buys Hidden Valley

16:58

Ranch in 1972. It's a nice

17:00

white colored sauce. 1983 they come

17:02

up with the first bottled salad

17:04

dressings. And I remember this bag.

17:07

I didn't even know what ranch

17:09

dressing was, but I do remember

17:11

eating my first cool ranch Dorito

17:14

chip. The blue bag. The red

17:16

speckles on it. Yeah, cool ranch

17:18

is an all-time name. Ranch

17:20

dressing total 1.3 billion

17:23

dollars last year. And

17:25

if you think about it, last

17:27

year in the US, 1.26

17:30

billion dollars of ketchup was

17:32

sold. So ranch. Cushing.

17:34

Cushing. So I think we'll get

17:36

into this. It's easier to

17:39

debate that, you know, like,

17:41

Cesar, I mean, ranch is

17:43

basically like taking like, like,

17:45

you know, ranch is basically

17:48

like taking like, you know,

17:50

America right now. Yeah,

17:52

for sure. Ranch is, like, that

17:55

says it all, right? There's

17:57

more ranch sold than

17:59

ketchup. I think

18:01

Caesar dressing, honestly, is a

18:03

little bit more like Mexico,

18:06

where it was invented by

18:08

Mr. Ritz. No, no, by

18:10

Caesar Cardini. Caesar Cardini. Excuse

18:12

me. I thought it was

18:15

at the Ritz Hotel. No.

18:17

Caesar's Palace in Tijuana. Cesar

18:19

Cardini. Wow, I've had that

18:22

wrong. I got a confused

18:24

too. What? Much, much less.

18:26

Much, like a tenth of

18:29

the sales of ranch. $150

18:31

million? Mm-hmm. You like an

18:33

underdog? That is shocking. I

18:36

would have thought that it

18:38

was higher than that. Yeah,

18:40

it's interesting though. That's part

18:42

of the debate, right? Because

18:45

do people dress their salads

18:47

at home with Caesar or

18:49

do they typically buy a

18:52

Caesar kit? And I wonder

18:54

if this includes that. So,

18:56

let's begin. Let the debate

18:59

club begin. I don't even

19:01

know how this starts because

19:03

no one invited me to

19:06

model UN. I'm so ill-prepared

19:08

for this. Opening statements, I

19:10

think. Okay. Is that how

19:12

it goes? I don't know.

19:15

That was the only nerd

19:17

club I wasn't in. I

19:19

believe that Ranch Dressing is

19:22

just a vehicle for MSG.

19:24

And it could have been

19:26

anything else. And listen, it's

19:29

delicious. But it's owned by

19:31

Clorox, right? That's weird. Ranch

19:33

dressing, while it's great on

19:36

pizza, it's also one of

19:38

the only ways I'll eat

19:40

a lot of vegetables. You

19:43

know, I'll prefer ranch dressing

19:45

than blue cheese with wings

19:47

and celery and carrots. I'm

19:49

not here to talk about

19:52

the virtues of ranch dressing.

19:54

But I do think that

19:56

it's been. Mostly marketing. There's

20:00

what if you go to the

20:03

grocery store, there's probably

20:05

like 26 different kind

20:07

of ranch dressings It is

20:09

the pumpkin spice of the

20:11

salad dressing world Where

20:14

it's all marketing mumbo

20:16

jumbo if people really

20:18

knew They probably wouldn't

20:20

eat so much ranch because

20:22

I don't think people realize

20:25

that it's really just a

20:27

vector for umami It's

20:30

okay? Okay. This is, and

20:32

I'll, my last, last

20:34

statement on this.

20:36

Caesar salad dressing is

20:38

better because it's not

20:41

something you can, I

20:43

mean, yes, you can buy it,

20:45

but I think why it makes

20:47

it, why it has an advantage

20:50

of a ranch, ranch

20:52

dressing, which I can

20:54

make at home, is not

20:57

as good as the bottle.

20:59

version. It just isn't. Cesar

21:01

dressing is not as

21:03

good bottled, but superior

21:06

homemade in the moment.

21:08

And I think that delta

21:10

of how delicious Cesar dressing,

21:13

good Cesar dressing is done

21:15

in the like moment where

21:18

you're making it all a

21:20

minute. That is much greater

21:22

than Cesar versus Ranch

21:24

making ranch, making ranch

21:27

dressing at home. or

21:29

in a restaurant. You know,

21:31

like, I feel like you

21:33

have to have both.

21:36

Seas addressing is good.

21:38

You can definitely have

21:40

it in a little cup

21:42

or a salad bowl, whatever,

21:45

purchased, but also

21:47

clearly delicious

21:49

homemade. Ranch, super

21:51

good in a bottle. Homemade,

21:54

I don't know. Here we

21:56

go. This

22:00

is exactly like the UN. First,

22:02

I want to thank Spotify

22:05

and the Ringer for hosting

22:07

this debate tonight. Bull shit.

22:09

Thank you to my opponent

22:11

for agreeing to this. I

22:13

did ask for three debates.

22:15

He asked for one. Let

22:18

that say what it is.

22:20

My opponent's going to throw

22:22

a lot of big phrases

22:24

at you. Vector for Umami.

22:26

He's gonna say, he's gonna

22:28

talk about MSG. And when

22:31

they go low, we go high.

22:33

And I wanna say right

22:35

off the bat, I love

22:37

your dressing. I love Caesar

22:39

dressing. I think it

22:42

is a fantastic creation.

22:44

I love that it

22:46

has its roots in

22:48

Tijuana. I love that

22:50

it's, uh, the purpose it

22:53

serves, which is. largely

22:55

for the Caesar salad.

22:58

Why I think that

23:00

ranch should be the

23:02

one dressing to

23:04

coat them all is because

23:07

of its versatility.

23:10

I don't believe in

23:12

my heart that a

23:15

Caesar dressing would go

23:17

great on. any kind of

23:19

salad. I think that a

23:21

Caesar salad is a perfect construction,

23:24

not just the dressing, but

23:26

the fact that it is Romaine

23:28

and Parmesan and Croutons ideal

23:30

for a Caesar dressing. Yes,

23:32

Clorox bought a certain kind of

23:35

ranch dressing, hidden valley specifically. I

23:37

don't want you all to think...

23:39

that because my dressing, my client,

23:41

is this white dressing, that it

23:44

somehow has something to do with

23:46

the Clorox company and the bleach

23:48

that they generally produce. Ranch dressing

23:50

goes on everything. Yes, it's better

23:53

out of the bottle. I will grant you

23:55

that I think that there's no reason

23:57

to make your own ranch dressing at

23:59

home. I agree with that as

24:01

well, but I struggled to

24:03

think of a thing that

24:06

cannot be dressed with ranch,

24:08

whether it is pizza or

24:10

fries or any of the

24:12

salads, whether it is a

24:14

iceberg lettuce, a romaine lettuce,

24:16

a spinach salad, all of

24:18

them can do with a

24:20

little bit of ranch dressing.

24:22

I don't know what it

24:24

has to do with pumpkin

24:27

spice. I don't think there's

24:29

a lie here at all.

24:31

I think it is a

24:33

tangy, lightly herb -y, delicious,

24:35

savory dressing that is not

24:37

limited to just your salads.

24:39

And I think the fact

24:41

that it's so ubiquitous in

24:43

this time, in this country,

24:45

where we feel so divided,

24:48

the one thing that unites

24:50

us all is a cool,

24:52

wet blanket of ranch dressing.

24:54

Exactly, sir. A wet blanket.

24:56

Shit! No,

25:03

I'm just saying, like, you know,

25:05

if this was a political

25:08

ad, they would cut out wet

25:10

blankets over and over and

25:12

over again because that's exactly what

25:14

it is. White! I misspoke

25:16

white blankets! It's a white blanket!

25:20

There's complexity, number one, there's complexity

25:22

in Caesar dressing. It's acidic

25:24

from the lemon juice. It has

25:26

natural umami. I love it,

25:28

MSG, don't get me wrong, but

25:32

anchovies, Worcestershire sauce, Parmesan, you

25:34

get all kinds of

25:36

umami. It is like all

25:38

different notes. You also

25:40

have egg yolk, which also

25:42

has a lot of

25:44

umami in it. It

25:47

is truly a modern dressing

25:49

that incorporates cultures from all

25:51

over the world. Worcestershire

25:54

sauce actually has fish sauce

25:56

in it as well. You

25:58

have Parmesan cheese. You got mustard

26:01

from France. It's made by

26:03

a Mexican chef in an

26:05

Italian restaurant. You

26:07

know, what's more, you can make

26:10

it with fish sauce if you want

26:12

to do that. You can do it

26:14

with a lime instead of

26:16

lemon. Oh, it's balanced. When

26:18

you taste it, you can

26:20

taste at least four different

26:22

flavors on your palate.

26:25

Ranch is pretty, you know.

26:27

As you say, if taste

26:29

is so one note, it

26:31

feels like a wet blanket.

26:34

Two, ranch dressing is

26:36

not something you want

26:38

to coat your lettuce in.

26:41

It's not. It's something,

26:43

as again, Chris Ying

26:45

alluded to, it dresses

26:48

your food like a

26:50

wet blanket. That's disgusting.

26:53

I say, that's just

26:56

straight disgusting. Caesar dressing

26:58

has the ability because

27:00

it's a technically a

27:03

dressing it is an

27:05

emulsification which is what

27:07

you want in a salad dressing

27:10

Ranch dressing truly

27:12

is either sour cream Buttermilk

27:14

and or mayonnaise flavored

27:17

with some Thried onions

27:19

garlic powder some dehydrated chives Some

27:21

wishes she or sauce or not,

27:23

but mostly MSG. And that pisses

27:26

me out because I love MSG.

27:28

But the reason why people love

27:30

it, it just, it shows the

27:33

popularity and power of MSG.

27:35

Here's another, I think just very

27:37

strong argument why C's

27:39

addressing is just superior to

27:41

ranch dressing. Have you ever tried

27:44

to heat up ranch? Has anyone

27:46

tried to heat up ranch? Has anyone

27:48

tried to heat up ranch? Has

27:50

anyone tried to heat up ranch?

27:52

Do yourself a favor. If you want

27:55

to use the microwave, if

27:57

you want to use a stove, do

27:59

yourself. a favor. Heat up some

28:01

ranch and taste it. Good luck

28:03

with that one. That's literally one

28:06

of the most vile flavors I

28:08

couldn't imagine and textures in one's

28:10

palate. Have you ever tried to

28:13

heat up Caesar dressing? It's awesome.

28:15

It's so good in a variety

28:17

of things. And here's another thing

28:20

that ranch dressing just can't do

28:22

in terms of its versatility. You

28:24

can't marinate. You know it's great.

28:27

C's addressing as a marination for

28:29

steak, beef, or chicken. You can

28:31

put it on sandwiches. Not that

28:34

you can't with ranch, but ranch

28:36

is more of a dipping sauce,

28:38

not a salad dressing. So I

28:40

mean, it's such a self-evident argument,

28:43

I'm not even talk about dressing.

28:45

Again, ranch is a dipping sauce,

28:47

aka wet blanket. Okay? I'm so

28:50

sad about that. Nobody makes ranch

28:52

dressing from home at home. Nobody.

28:54

Except me sometimes. And you know

28:57

why? I'm too lazy to go

28:59

to the market and the supermarket

29:01

and buy bottle ranch. And you

29:04

know what? You know why? I'm

29:06

bummed about that. I don't get

29:08

a discount when I go to

29:11

the grocery store on my bottle

29:13

of bleach from coal rocks when

29:15

I buy a bottle of hidden

29:17

valley ranch. Because I think you

29:20

should. They're made by the same

29:22

company. They're their best friends. Who

29:24

wants to? I have bleached next

29:27

to their salad dressing. I mean

29:29

you can't just wash your clothes

29:31

with ranch too though. So I'm

29:34

just gonna rest my case there.

29:36

It's about the versatility. It's a

29:38

it's a really a modern dressing

29:41

made a hundred years ago by

29:43

a Mexican chef again in an

29:45

Italian restaurant using global flavors and

29:48

ranch dressing was really made by

29:50

a marketing firm in the 1950s

29:52

attributed to cowboys Mr. Henson. that

29:54

honestly is fake like the Marlboro

29:57

men. We

30:02

didn't even know his name

30:04

five seconds ago. All right.

30:06

Is it my turn? My opponent

30:08

here criticized Ranch for

30:10

being, I believe he

30:12

said one note, and

30:14

he celebrated the four flavors

30:17

of a Caesar dressing. Four

30:19

flavors. Four flavors. I mean,

30:21

one flavor was good enough

30:23

for my daddy. It was good

30:26

enough for his daddy. Four

30:28

flavors, Dave. That's too many

30:30

flavors. What, what, when did

30:32

this country become about all

30:34

these different flavors? One flavor

30:36

that is delicious and creamy

30:38

and yes, umami is plenty

30:40

for me. And warm, warm

30:42

dollop of ranch dressing in

30:45

your mouth. Excuse me, excuse

30:47

me, excuse me. I don't want to

30:49

be a fear monger. I don't,

30:51

I really don't. Some of my

30:53

best friends are anchovies. But where

30:55

are these anchovies coming from? Where

30:58

how are they getting here?

31:00

And then he says there's

31:02

worse sure sure sauce from

31:04

England? Mustered from France?

31:06

There's not enough good

31:08

stuff in America just to

31:10

make your own delicious American

31:13

dressing and then what did

31:15

he say? It's an emulsifar

31:17

cation I can't pronounce it

31:19

and I don't want it Here's

31:22

some things I can't pronounce

31:24

Dave Buttermilk Rich.

31:26

Dill. Steve. Dill is

31:28

grown. Steve Henson. And

31:30

finally, I know I

31:32

said I wouldn't go

31:35

on the attack here and

31:37

I really don't want

31:39

to. And I'm not going

31:41

to waste your time reading

31:44

past quotes, but I

31:46

would ask you the listener

31:48

to simply go online and

31:51

Google. David Chang and Chicken

31:53

Bacon Ranch, and I think

31:55

you are going to find

31:58

some alarming positive praise. that

32:00

my opponent has had. I

32:02

never said I disliked Ranch.

32:05

What I'm simply saying very

32:07

clearly is that Ranch is

32:09

not as amazing or as

32:12

powerful as C's addressing. And

32:14

as my friend Steve Plotnicki

32:16

used to say, the great

32:19

german, truly great german, one

32:21

of the greatest of all

32:23

time. As he used to

32:26

say, you can not say

32:28

that's Salieri. was better than

32:30

Mozart. She just can't. And

32:33

maybe Chris, you should listen

32:35

to some Salieri because that's

32:37

exactly what ranch dressing is

32:40

to the Mozart. That is

32:42

Caesar dressing. I'm pretty sure

32:44

Mozart here. I'm pretty sure.

32:47

Everybody thinks of the resistance,

32:49

but the reality is Mozart

32:51

is Caesar dressing. End of

32:54

story. You know, you can

32:56

like Salieri all you want,

32:58

buddy. Only have one. For

33:01

the rest of my life.

33:03

One dressing. It would be

33:05

ranch. That's pathetic. I'm only

33:08

shake your hand. I will

33:10

not. I am. I will

33:12

not stoop to this level.

33:15

What's insane is that you

33:17

made a switch right before

33:19

this. This is American politics

33:22

and it much. We could

33:24

have got either way. Well,

33:27

I think the producers have

33:29

to let us know who

33:32

were in the Supreme. I

33:34

need one minute of closing

33:36

statements. Both of you gave

33:38

the first. You know, my

33:40

candidate, the candidate over here

33:43

just mentioned something that was

33:45

really sad. But unfortunately true.

33:47

That we are what we

33:49

eat and it is a

33:52

representation of the divided America

33:54

that we live in. And

33:56

listen. You can choose what

33:58

you want. Right? But I

34:01

would rather choose a salad

34:03

dressing that delivers

34:05

on its promise. That's

34:07

not just one sour

34:09

cream thing. That is

34:12

multicultural. That has all

34:14

kinds of balance. And

34:16

that's what we need.

34:19

It literally is a

34:21

salad dressing that takes

34:23

from both aisles. Both the

34:25

worlds. And that's what

34:27

I'm trying to say

34:30

is, it's better because

34:32

it's a little bit

34:34

of everything. And

34:36

I'm not trying to say

34:38

ranch isn't great, but

34:41

the difference is like,

34:43

I can have a

34:45

conversation with ranch, but

34:48

ranch can have a

34:50

conversation with me. Ranch

34:52

doesn't want to use.

34:55

All right, here are

34:57

my closing statements.

34:59

I'm gonna read off a list

35:01

here. Regular, cheesy, creamy

35:04

jalapeno, spicy hot

35:07

honey, garlic, Parmesan,

35:09

sizzling Nashville hot,

35:11

green, goddess, pickle, buffalo,

35:14

avocado, buttermilk, bacon,

35:16

southwest, coleslaw, and

35:18

spicy. Those are

35:20

just some of the

35:22

varieties of the varieties

35:24

of ranch. dressing

35:27

available to you as

35:29

an American citizen.

35:32

Caesar dressing, I

35:34

love it. It was great.

35:36

It's the dressing of

35:38

our oldest generation.

35:40

It was invented

35:42

in the 1920s.

35:45

Ranch is about

35:47

progress. It is about

35:49

the future of this country.

35:51

Yes. Yes, it's about efficiency

35:54

today. Yes, yes, I want

35:56

to cut out some of

35:58

the fat. That's why there's

36:00

light ranch dressings as

36:03

well. Ranch dressing for

36:05

all its many facets

36:07

is this country's dressing.

36:09

It is now and

36:11

forever shall be this

36:14

country's dressing and it

36:16

will change with this

36:18

country as me and

36:20

my Dutch friends change

36:22

it for the bitter.

36:27

Thank you. Thank you again

36:29

to this hallowed institution for

36:31

hosting this debate. And thank

36:33

you to my opponent. There are

36:35

four of us in here. We

36:38

will take a minute to deliberate.

36:40

Okay, on a ruling of three

36:42

to one. Three to one. We

36:45

have decided teen ranch. Um, I

36:47

know. So, surprising. We were just

36:50

handed down a verdict of

36:52

three to one in favor of

36:54

ranch. If I ever wanted to

36:56

feel like Al Gore, man. I

36:59

do now because it's a bunch

37:01

of bullshit. A bunch of fucking

37:04

bullshit. This is crazy that the

37:06

producers voted down truly what is

37:08

American salad dressing and voted for

37:11

Ranch because they argued that

37:13

it's got a better argument. I'm

37:15

sorry folks. I just want to

37:18

say I want to say while

37:20

I... What is this world coming

37:22

to? While I treasure this victory.

37:25

And greatly appreciate it. Again, thank

37:27

you to the spot in the

37:30

Ringer Studios for hosting this. The

37:32

fact that I want is troubling.

37:35

It is troubling. It is

37:37

troubling. But thank you. There will

37:39

be retribution. I will be coming

37:41

for it. You can't believe I

37:44

lost. You know what I can't

37:46

believe? I can't believe that one

37:49

person in that booth side with

37:51

you. And I will find out

37:53

who you are. This is a

37:56

bullshit. I'm actually so pissed. All

37:58

right, folks. I don't

38:00

think he can continue with

38:03

the show honestly. I think

38:05

this might be it. Mr.

38:07

Tea Party over here. Okay.

38:09

It's a member of the

38:11

Colbert Report. It's a it's

38:14

a it's a visit. It's

38:16

a bit. I don't think

38:18

so. Well, there you have it.

38:20

A truly first of its

38:22

kind debate club. My pal

38:25

and enemy. Chris enemy

38:27

for sure. Chris Yang. I

38:29

guess I have to abide by those

38:31

laws, those laws that are

38:34

stacked against you because of

38:36

gerrymandering. We divvy up in

38:38

the production booth in this small

38:41

regions. You can't go wrong with

38:43

any of these salad dresses, but

38:45

let's be honest. Caesar is the

38:48

better. Okay, okay, okay, there's no

38:50

way to totalize it. We're gonna

38:53

take a break and we're getting

38:55

into a quick moy. All

38:59

right, Chang, I got two topics for

39:01

you in today's moeiff, my

39:03

opinion is fact. This isn't,

39:05

this is interesting, because

39:07

I never really, we haven't

39:09

talked about this before, I

39:12

don't think. Underrated or

39:14

overrated, the spork, the half spoon,

39:16

half fork. So, for the longest

39:19

time, I'm sure even in

39:21

interviews or like, the journalist

39:23

will say, what's your favorite

39:25

utensil, I'd be so like...

39:27

you know, cool and be

39:30

like less pork.

39:32

But I gotta say,

39:35

outside of pop

39:37

eyes, it should be

39:39

the utensil

39:42

for me. Right? It

39:44

is a hybrid spork

39:47

and spoon.

39:49

I actually don't

39:52

know. It's everything

39:55

about it. a distillation

39:57

of me as a person.

40:00

Right? Weirdly at the top?

40:02

Weird. Smooth at the bottom.

40:05

And like it's very utilitarian,

40:07

it's efficient, it's effective, it's

40:09

a hybrid. It's looked down

40:11

at, looked down upon. But

40:13

like, like when you go camping,

40:16

makes sense. I don't know

40:18

why it makes sense when you're

40:20

pop eyes, but it does, because you

40:22

need that for red beans and

40:24

rice. And even their dirty rice,

40:27

which is underrated and good.

40:30

So I can't tell you for the

40:32

life of me why I don't

40:34

use a spork. Why do you

40:36

not have a spork in your

40:38

drawer? Do you have a spork

40:41

in your drawer? Like a kid

40:43

one. I don't even have a

40:45

kid one. And I am ashamed

40:48

that I am embarrassed to admit

40:50

that I don't own a

40:52

spork. And I had to

40:54

ask myself, what is it about

40:56

a spork? Why? And it's

40:58

done on me. why I don't

41:00

like the spork. The reason

41:03

I don't like a spork

41:05

is because it looks

41:07

weird. When I look

41:09

at it, I'm just

41:11

like, there's something about it

41:14

that's weird. It's, it's, it's,

41:16

it's like, I don't, I

41:18

don't have anything that's a

41:21

platypus. You know, I

41:23

don't want to be

41:25

specious. But I'm like... What's

41:28

going on? What's going on?

41:31

Something's wrong with your spoon,

41:33

man! I was like, what

41:36

are you, duck or beaver?

41:38

What's going on, man? You

41:40

know? It's like, are we

41:43

in the awkward teen

41:45

phase of your evolution?

41:47

Like, what is going

41:49

on? And no disrespect

41:51

to all the platypuses

41:54

out there. I'm just

41:56

simply saying. I should

41:59

love I should be

42:01

making sports, for God's sake,

42:03

but I think my reason

42:06

why it is underrated, because

42:08

it has a visual platypus-like

42:11

effect. It is a chimera,

42:13

right? Half minitor, half man.

42:15

It's just, it doesn't make

42:18

any sense to people. And

42:20

like, let's be honest, we

42:23

talked about lying to oneself.

42:25

Is it as useful as

42:27

people think it is actually

42:30

useful? Is it actually useful?

42:32

Again, all the time I

42:35

use it is to dig

42:37

into red beans and rice.

42:39

And what do you use

42:42

the tines for just to

42:44

get a little piece of

42:47

meat? Yeah. And like, let's

42:49

be honest. We talked about

42:51

lying to oneself. I'll tell

42:54

you how I lie pop

42:56

eyes. I'll eat that coleslaw.

42:59

No I don't. No I

43:01

don't. Just like don't even

43:03

give it to me. I

43:06

won't eat the biscuit. Yes

43:08

I will. I don't need

43:11

the biscuit. Yes I do.

43:13

Get some vegetables in here.

43:15

Coleslaw. Wrong. All right another

43:18

topic. What do you think?

43:20

On the spork. Is

43:23

it weird that I'm like a

43:26

little bit afraid of a spork?

43:28

I'm trying to say the reason

43:30

why is the visual platypus like

43:33

effect. It is a culinary chimera

43:35

gone wrong. I think that Yoda

43:37

put it best. Like I'm a

43:40

little afraid of this thing and

43:42

fear leads to anger. But here's

43:45

the thing. Hey Chris, here's the

43:47

deal. Everything we want is on

43:49

the other side of fear. Red

43:52

beans and rice right over there.

43:54

They're all right there. I agree.

43:56

I'm a little afraid. Why we

43:59

should be fully embracing invested in

44:01

the sport. Have you? ever seen

44:03

a sport in a restaurant context

44:06

that wasn't a fast food restaurant?

44:08

No! You know why? Visually I

44:10

think it does too. I think

44:13

that's the only reason because you

44:15

can even make a sport where

44:17

the prongs are longer. But I

44:20

just... See I would be too

44:22

scared of that. I think people

44:25

just are freaked out. And I

44:27

do believe when I say the

44:29

platus of a platypus effect, it

44:32

is the same sort of Greek

44:34

mythology or... the chimer effect which

44:36

is like half animal half man

44:39

you know merger I think that

44:41

makes people like what's going on

44:43

yeah I mean at least like

44:46

the the tweezers that people are

44:48

the four steps that we made

44:50

the prediction will take over the

44:53

world in terms of how they

44:55

eat and make sense it looks

44:58

sleek yeah with a different name

45:00

it's one piece yeah yeah I

45:02

like the four steps thing I

45:05

forgot about that we should see

45:07

nobody says the platypus is their

45:09

favorite animal Are you a duck?

45:12

Are you a beaver? The fuck

45:14

are you? Be one thing. All

45:16

right. Is it... When is it

45:19

appropriate to be talking out loud

45:21

on your phone in public, if

45:23

ever? And where is it most

45:26

annoying to encounter other people doing

45:28

it? I'm glad you bring this

45:31

up. Because on my daily walks,

45:33

and you see who the people

45:35

are, right? Walking, you see the

45:38

same people, you see some people

45:40

that have headphones. Sometimes I forget

45:42

to wear my headphones in the

45:45

morning, because it's early and I

45:47

forget. But there's a couple people

45:49

that I walk past. One person

45:52

is talking extremely loud on speaker

45:54

phone. Yeah,

45:56

they have all the freedom

45:59

to do whatever we want,

46:01

but it is like the

46:03

noise pollution very aggressive it's

46:05

it's it's it's it's a

46:07

lot yeah and then there's

46:09

another person that listens to

46:11

their podcasts or whatever radio

46:13

they're listening full blast in

46:16

their like coat pocket no

46:18

headphones no headphones just playing

46:20

it out like a boom

46:22

box yeah so I will

46:24

do that sometimes when I

46:26

know nobody's Right? The apathy

46:28

to realize I should, oh

46:30

there's people coming up, they're

46:33

walking around, I'm gonna turn

46:35

it down, so I'm not

46:37

gonna, my noise pollution isn't

46:39

gonna invade their space. But

46:41

I think there's some people

46:43

that are like, I don't

46:45

give a fuck. I don't

46:47

understand the, I don't give

46:49

a fuck. I don't understand

46:52

the, I don't give a

46:54

fuck. I don't understand the,

46:56

I don't give a fuck,

46:58

of it all, nor do

47:00

I understand the speakerphone I

47:02

don't want to put this

47:04

thing next to my head.

47:06

I've never understood this. But

47:09

thinking about it, some more.

47:11

I think that maybe you

47:13

guys can, the audience will

47:15

agree with them. I think

47:17

there's one place in the

47:19

world where you see the

47:21

volume loud on your phone.

47:23

And it could be people

47:26

watching. like an Instagram or

47:28

TikTok clip, loud, and then

47:30

give fuck. It also could

47:32

be them talking to somebody

47:34

on the phone, very loudly.

47:36

I can't be the only

47:38

one that thinks this. It

47:40

takes place in this very

47:42

specific moment. It's the bus

47:45

that takes you from a

47:47

terminal to the gate. No,

47:49

really! It always happens! Like

47:51

clock- and you're like, what

47:53

the fuck? It's the bus

47:55

transfer. You know why? People

47:57

are bored, they don't want

47:59

to look at anybody else,

48:02

they're packed in their like

48:04

sardine cans, and like, they just

48:06

took their earbuds out or whatever, it's in their pocket, or maybe it's

48:08

in the bag, and now you're like sandwiched in, you're like, I don't

48:10

get that, or maybe by then their batteries are dead, they're like, whatever.

48:12

And then you got that awkward moment of. I don't know what I

48:14

don't know what I don't know what I don't know what I don't

48:16

know what I don't know, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, I don't know what

48:19

I don't know, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, I don't know what I

48:21

don't know what I don't know what I don't know, maybe, maybe, maybe,

48:23

maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, I don't know, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe,

48:25

that's talking to their significant other

48:27

or a family member like yeah

48:29

yeah yeah I'll be I did

48:32

this so they're organizing the travel

48:34

or they've just landed and

48:36

for whatever reason they're not

48:38

bringing the phone to their head

48:40

everyone can hear their conversation

48:43

and it's even the most annoying

48:45

on this moment is when it

48:47

is an empty bus and it's

48:49

those buses that are like taped

48:51

together when you don't know how

48:53

it works you know it means

48:55

It's like a caterpillar that wobbles.

48:57

An accordion that connects them, yeah. You

49:00

could be at the front, there's nobody

49:02

else in there, and then

49:04

there's somebody in the back, usually

49:06

with a kid, just full blast.

49:08

Just flipping through Tik Talks and

49:10

Instagrams, yeah. Ruins my day. Yeah,

49:12

it's the worst. It's 100% true.

49:14

I think it is for that

49:17

reason too, where it's like, I'm

49:19

conserving my headphone battery, I'm putting

49:21

it in a plane or whatever.

49:23

Rather than be like, I'm just not

49:25

going to have the volume up

49:27

right now. It's like, well, fuck it.

49:30

People know that it's such a transactional

49:32

experience. You'll never see. You're never there.

49:34

You're not going to be it. It

49:37

is almost always. It's never going

49:39

to the plane. It's disembarking on the

49:41

plane. Because you're like, I'm never

49:43

going to see these fucking people

49:45

again. So I'm going to act like

49:47

the worst person in the fucking world.

49:50

You know, yeah. The specific bus

49:52

transfer to the parking lot or

49:54

whatever. So you agree? Yeah. I'm

49:56

sure there's other moments in life,

49:58

but you know. I think it's

50:01

specifically that. Yeah, I've seen the

50:03

disembarking from a plane getting onto

50:05

a bus to the terminal. Because

50:07

no one's gonna do that. Nobody

50:09

has the balls to do that

50:11

from the terminal to the plane.

50:13

Right. Because what if I have

50:15

to sit next to this? Yeah.

50:17

What if we're getting off the

50:19

same airline? At least people, they

50:21

have the decency to just turn

50:23

that shit off. Yeah. But leaving

50:25

you're just like, I'll never see

50:27

this motherfucker again. I'm out of

50:29

this motherfucker. noise pollute in the

50:31

world and their preference of ranch

50:33

dressing people. We believe in efficiency.

50:35

Why get my headburns out? I

50:37

can more efficiently just listen. Listen,

50:39

we're going to get out of

50:41

here. Give us five stars. Just

50:43

join us on Spotify. Subscribe to

50:45

our YouTube channel. The Dave Chang

50:47

show at the Dave Chang show

50:49

and at the Dave Chang show

50:51

and at the what is it?

50:53

Resby Club official. You promised the

50:55

recipe though. I promised a recipe,

50:57

I'm going to give you a

50:59

recipe, because I know that we

51:01

talked about in the past, talking

51:03

about lavash and it's versatility. What

51:05

is lavash Christian? It is, and

51:07

I think it originally is like

51:09

a, specifically an Armenian flat bread,

51:11

but it is, you know, a,

51:13

the vessel you get to wrap

51:15

up grilled meats at, you know.

51:17

I'm beginning to think that is

51:19

the king of breads. It's so

51:21

versatile. So I don't know if

51:23

I gave you a proper recipe,

51:25

but if I did, I have

51:27

an improved recipe for a lavash

51:29

pizza. And the reason why this

51:31

is important is if you have

51:33

children, sometimes they want pizza and

51:35

they want something that's hot and

51:37

you have to make it and

51:39

you got to make it quick.

51:41

So I'll take a stainless-dew pan

51:43

or the pan from Kirkpatrick Forge,

51:46

right? It could be cast iron

51:48

as well. I'll get that heated

51:50

heated up. I'll take three big

51:52

pieces of lavash and I'll liberally

51:54

coat them with olive oil, right?

51:56

To the point where they're sort

51:58

of wet and if you want

52:00

to you can even use a

52:02

little water. to smash it in.

52:04

So you're trying to smash those

52:06

three, so you put one in

52:08

and then you put another layer.

52:10

So the entire sort of round

52:12

of the pan is now, it

52:14

almost looks like a bass cheesecake

52:16

with the parchment paper up. And

52:18

then you want to cover all

52:20

the sides and then you sort

52:22

of like push it towards the

52:24

edge of the pan. You can

52:26

use quite a bit of olive

52:28

olive olive oil because that's the

52:30

best thing to sort of soak

52:32

it. And then. on a on

52:34

a stovetop I heat it up

52:36

a little bit and while it's

52:38

heating up I put just a

52:40

thin layer of pizza sauce or

52:42

marinara from the can no from

52:44

the jar and then I put

52:46

mozzarella you know dry mozzarella I

52:48

haven't done it with fret like

52:50

wet mozzarella and then I'll take

52:52

some pepperoni the big things and

52:54

I'll just roll it up and

52:56

I'll dice it up and I'll

52:58

mix it in. Maybe I'll

53:00

put some dried oregano, whatever, but

53:03

olive oil, that's it, and some

53:05

Parmesan. I put that in like

53:07

a 425 degree oven and out

53:10

comes the best thin-cressed pizza you

53:12

can make. And because if you

53:14

arrange the layers of the wash

53:17

properly, if you cut it, it

53:19

is like becomes one. Like Voltron.

53:21

It's awesome, man. And some people,

53:23

I made it for, Hugo had

53:26

some friends over, their parents, and

53:28

I'm like, what? What is this

53:30

octomy? So it's like, you line

53:33

the pan with like olive oil

53:35

soaked lavash, it's kind of poking

53:37

out or on the sides, you

53:40

know, coming out of the pan

53:42

here and there, and then it's

53:44

just sauce, cheese, pepperoni, into the

53:46

oven. Yeah. And you want to

53:49

sort of tuck in. the edges,

53:51

right? You don't want it like

53:53

hanging out so much. So if

53:56

you want, you can fold over...

53:58

what's hanging and then like tuck

54:00

it in so it makes like

54:02

a proper like like pie crust

54:05

almost because if you you really want

54:07

to cook it on a high heat

54:09

because you want to get that shell

54:11

it gets so crispy if you don't

54:13

sort of tuck it in and you

54:15

get it to the crispy point that

54:17

I'm doing it will burn. So that's

54:19

why you want to talk in. Mm-hmm.

54:21

It's, it's, I've tried not this version,

54:23

but last time you talked about sort

54:25

of the lavash pizza I made it

54:27

and it is like, I feel like

54:29

people are obsessed with or this trending

54:31

is like the sort of tavern style

54:33

Chicago thin crust cracker thin pizza. Like

54:35

this is that but better I think. And

54:38

with that being said, thank you guys and

54:40

we don't know if there'll be a little

54:42

bit of a break or no break at

54:44

all, but we'll talk to you soon.

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