0:00

The HoneyDew with Sickler.

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Welcome back

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to the HoneyDew y'all. We're over here

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doing it in the night pan studios. I'm

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Ryan Sickler. Ryan Sickler dot com.

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And today's guest actually did the crap

1:15

piece, but he is now here for the first time.

1:17

You guys know what we do over here. We highlight the

1:19

low lights. And I always say these are the

1:21

stories behind the storytellers. And I am very

1:23

excited to have here today

1:26

first time on the

1:26

HoneyDew. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome

1:29

Big day open, so welcome to the HoneyDew video.

1:31

Alright.

1:31

Thank you for having me. Thank you for having me. This

1:33

is something I wanted to do for a while. Before

1:37

we get into whatever you wanna talk

1:38

about, please plug, promote everything.

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I believe. Great. So check that out. It's just

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YouTube free. Enjoy. Same

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thing I'm doing. That's the way to do it. I love

2:12

it. I love it. It is in our end. I did

2:14

not. You have you

2:17

have good, like, you have a broad, like, production

2:19

knowledge though too. Aside

2:21

from just comedy, which is important. That's what

2:23

it was, like, the hardest thing for me. Like,

2:26

not just being involved in all like, when other

2:28

people produce things, you

2:29

just, like, just show up and be funny. Yeah. What do you think

2:31

the backdrop should be? Or this? Whatever. I

2:33

agree

2:34

with that. And then now it's like, you know, what do you think backdrop

2:36

should be? And it's like, this might be cool

2:38

when they go. Okay. That's fourteen

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grams. You're

2:41

like, you're like, no one?

2:42

Yeah. You know what? No one needs that.

2:44

You got some towels back there. Of it.

2:46

Yeah.

2:46

When you're playing with, like, Comedy Central or Netflix

2:48

Monday, it's fine. Can there

2:49

be a volcano behind me? But it A

2:52

real Am I erupted? It's

2:54

fucking great. That's the truth though. What's it called

2:57

again? Dog belly. Dog belly.

2:59

Alright. It comes out in April. Look,

3:01

I wanted to talk to you for a long time because know

3:03

that you were a single

3:05

dad like myself. You have a

3:07

daughter like I do. I didn't realize you said

3:10

she's twenty now and I was like

3:11

fuck, that's older and I

3:12

thought it makes you feel older. But

3:15

I wanna talk to you about that because co

3:17

parenting is challenging. Quite

3:19

a bit. But what's

3:21

your upbringing? What's your background? Like, what

3:23

you're from Philly

3:24

originally, but what was your family life,

3:26

like your mom

3:27

and dad split early? My dad split

3:30

my mom dad split when I was three. He

3:33

took off off and all his He

3:35

left. Yeah. He went to well, they fought.

3:37

They had an argument, and he left one night and that

3:39

was it. And he He

3:43

went to Florida for a while because he had

3:45

family there. His family

3:47

is like a weird, almost story.

3:49

My dad I

3:52

know he tells it, like, a little more dramatic than I

3:54

think it actually was, but they were Florida. His

3:56

dad his dad sucked

3:58

So the mom packed them all up and moved for

4:00

some reason to Philly, married

4:03

a guy there. He was abusive and

4:05

kicked the shit of everybody. And

4:07

then they all went back to Florida

4:09

and he stayed in Philly and dot dot dot

4:11

met my

4:12

mom. And do you have

4:13

brothers and sisters? Do you have brothers

4:15

and sisters? I have. So my mom I'm

4:18

the only child of my mom and dad. Okay. My

4:20

mom has three with my stepfather

4:22

-- Okay. -- two sisters and a brother. And

4:25

my dad's got two sons in

4:27

Ohio with my stepmother. So

4:29

we're gonna get to that. Yeah. Yeah. It's interesting.

4:32

So he left you. So he left

4:34

Yeah. So they've split. I mean, and he went to

4:36

the far left. He

4:37

didn't just wasn't co parenting. No.

4:39

No. No. And he and he came back I mean, when I

4:41

was still little, he definitely came back

4:44

It may have been, like, six months. It may have been three

4:46

months. It could have been a year. I don't remember because I was too

4:49

young. But when he was back, all

4:51

my next memory has left my mom, and then he was

4:53

with Kathy. My first stepmother. Kathy

4:56

was great. She had

4:58

three kids also. And

5:00

then I that was, like, the weekends I was supposed to

5:02

go there every other weekend, which

5:05

got dialed back to when

5:08

he showed up, which wasn't all the time.

5:10

Consistently. And

5:13

and that was sort of like the way it

5:15

was, like throughout the whole thing. Like, if I didn't, you

5:17

know, he forgot birthdays a

5:19

lot. But he would take me,

5:21

but it always felt arbitrary like he kinda

5:23

had to.

5:25

And what's funny though is

5:27

as an adult, I know I'm drifting on the story

5:29

of not here, but as an adult, it

5:32

is you said you're fifty. I'm forty five.

5:35

I feel sympathy more for like my parents

5:38

not my parents. My mom didn't really fuck up much,

5:40

I'd say. Nothing that was

5:42

life changing anyway. My dad, like,

5:44

I feel like sympathy for

5:46

his fuckups because when

5:49

I left my ex

5:52

wife, Yo. So you were

5:54

married. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, okay. When

5:57

I left, my daughter was twelve. And

6:02

how I was, like, thank my

6:04

debt. How freaked out I was that

6:06

my daughter would think any feel any way about

6:08

me is my dad how I

6:10

feel about my dad scared the

6:12

shit out of me. And it's probably honestly and

6:15

it's no disrespect to my ex wife. She was great.

6:17

It was just we shouldn't have gotten married You know

6:19

what I mean, I was like a

6:21

young fat kid and then for the first

6:23

time in my life from doing comedy, even

6:26

if it was I just never had in my life,

6:28

even if it was someone who was morbidly

6:31

obese and unattractive to me.

6:33

I was so insecure that I was anything.

6:35

I'd be like, mhmm. Let's go do it.

6:38

And, you know, so I wasn't ready for,

6:40

like, a a kid marriage. But

6:42

as you are ready to do that. I stayed wait.

6:45

It was funny when my

6:47

daughter became, like, you know, older, and I talked to her

6:49

about it. I was like because

6:51

I was surprised that she even had, like,

6:53

the I was blown away that as

6:55

tight as I thought we were. She

6:58

had the classic I thought you left because

7:00

of me thing. And she told

7:02

me she held onto that for years. I was like, oh, man.

7:04

I go, I'm so happy you told me because

7:07

I can clear that up pretty quick. I

7:09

was there about six years longer than I ever would

7:11

have been because of you. Because

7:13

I

7:13

was, like, if I had left when you were,

7:15

like, six, it's

7:17

probably around the time where I realized I'm, like, I don't

7:19

know, man. This might not be it might move

7:21

instead was to go, let's get married. But

7:24

I kinda like didn't really know what the outcome

7:26

was gonna be, but, like, you

7:28

know, if we if there wasn't a kid, I was like,

7:31

but I if I left, I was

7:33

I was broke. And

7:35

by that, I mean, even at the I HoneyDew if

7:37

you break even at the end of a month, you're

7:39

broke. You know what I mean? If you're paying all your bills,

7:42

be another year broke. And I was

7:44

we were like that. And I was like, if I

7:46

leave, you know what I mean,

7:48

now I'm like, having you

7:50

know, I'm cutting in half that my household

7:53

income ultimately and

7:55

wherever I can afford to live is not gonna

7:57

be convenient to get to her and

8:00

it's gonna be hard and it's almost thinking

8:03

about that, gave me sympathy for my

8:05

dad in a bit because he just he was young,

8:07

one. So they were nineteen. When

8:09

I was three, they were twenty two.

8:12

He split my first stepmother older

8:14

than him. I didn't realize how much older because

8:16

he seemed he's my dad. I didn't see he was

8:18

twenty two year old kid. Twenty three year old kid.

8:22

Do you know

8:22

what I mean? thought he was just Oakerson Always

8:24

a man. Yeah. Even when I grew up watching

8:27

guys in NFL with these big beards and

8:29

shit, I thought they were in their forties. Yeah. And

8:31

then I'm

8:31

like, this is this is a twenty year old or children.

8:34

Yeah. Yeah. So I do

8:36

have the thing because

8:38

there's days where she's, like, out of sight, out

8:40

of mind, I started to get your appreciation

8:42

for that. Like, it's something I didn't wanna

8:45

spend time my daughter or talk her on the phone every

8:47

day. But you had to make an

8:49

effort to, like, do just in

8:51

a sense of, like,

8:53

you know, just if you forget would get a thing at the end

8:55

of night if I was on the road and they just realized, I'm

8:57

like, oh, it's a three hour time difference and

9:00

she's definitely asleep now. I didn't call her

9:02

today at all. And I'm like, And I'd

9:04

always have this. I'm like, this is This is the beginning

9:06

of the therapy. Like, my dad doesn't pay

9:08

attention to me. And it's

9:10

funny to put that pressure myself

9:13

that she's like, oh, like, she's just, you know, if you're

9:15

a good father to your kids, even

9:17

if you fuck up and do things

9:18

wrong, like, they

9:19

know you're going to. Of course. Oh, yeah.

9:22

You're a a good

9:24

you know what I mean? Like, if you're a a president, they

9:26

they don't they don't have the pressure

9:28

on you you have on you yet. So remember my daughter,

9:31

I'd go okay, Isabelle, when things

9:33

started to happen little bit and I'd be traveling

9:35

a lot more. And I'm like, I know Isabelle's

9:37

supposed to see this weekend, but, like, gotta

9:39

do a gig now. Like, I'm gonna be gone for, like, a week,

9:42

you know, whatever. But when I come back, like, let's make sure

9:44

we go to dinner and, like, I wanna do

9:46

this and and she's like,

9:48

Okay? And I'm like, I promise

9:50

I'll call you every day when I'm gone. And and she's

9:53

like, a teenage. You know? And she's like,

9:55

oh, alright. What's the are you in dying?

9:57

And I'm like, No. But just know that I'm

9:59

here and, like, you know, I'd be so worried about

10:01

that, you know, vocalizing

10:04

that. So when you say drifting off, but

10:06

I'm I was really processing myself.

10:08

So,

10:11

you know, my mom was

10:13

your dad, basically my mom split.

10:15

And we were raised by our dad. And now

10:17

I I'm I was with you. Like, I

10:19

was scared of being a parent at first because

10:21

I was like, what if that's genetic? You

10:24

know, what if that's just in my fucking jeans

10:26

to just leave a fucking kid?

10:27

But I don't even know I said I I give that feeling

10:30

too, but I I think it's more like human

10:32

is what it

10:33

is. So my I'm I'm I'm finished up to

10:35

your point. I'm it scared to fuck out

10:37

of me to be a shitty parent too, which is why

10:39

I went hard to same

10:40

way. I'm like, I'll call you, and my daughter's eight. She's

10:42

like, alright, I'll call you later. Yeah. I miss you and

10:44

I love you. By the way, if you forget the call, the next

10:46

morning we wake up, when you call and you're apologizing, she's

10:48

like, Oh, okay. Yeah. Well Alright. Yeah. Yeah.

10:52

But again, I see the thing where I said about the effort

10:54

and and having the sympathy for it is just

10:57

like, he's some guy give

10:59

up the thing. He's twenty when I when

11:01

I'm three years old, he's twenty three, twenty

11:03

two, twenty three. He

11:06

splits he's a kid, like, what really just

11:08

felt got taken off his plate was responsibility.

11:11

And he's not even thinking long term of what it's

11:13

gonna be, such a You know what I mean? It's like a kid. So

11:16

I do feel the thing, like, of

11:18

his life, like, he

11:19

probably liked his new wife

11:21

and was enjoying fucking her, and But

11:24

how was your mom when he left her same

11:26

age? Same age. Same age. This twenty two year old

11:28

woman -- Oh, he has to have all the responsibility.

11:31

And I'm oh, no. I'm not saying it's not fucked

11:33

up with

11:34

you. I'm just saying I can sympathize. What

11:36

I'm saying? Your mom was able to handle

11:38

that. Oh, yeah. Yeah. She never could've. No.

11:40

No. No. For sure. We're never could have because of

11:42

exactly the thing I get the idea.

11:45

And I found myself falling into it. don't think

11:47

my daughter even mind saying it's like, She's

11:49

never a burden to me ever in any situation

11:51

at all. But there might be a

11:54

night in my life where I was like, you

11:56

know, You want to do some weird,

11:58

like, you know, it's like that's do some fucking

12:01

sexually weird desires. You know, and it's like,

12:04

me and mom are arguing, like, can I come stay

12:06

at your place and you're like, make

12:09

up with each other? You know what I mean? That's

12:11

like, Now it's like if she goes by

12:14

half too and she's or you're coming

12:16

over, it's the whole thing's different. But I'm saying, like, there's nights

12:18

where you're like, I don't wanna be a dad that I don't wanna

12:20

do something weird or fucking you know what I mean? Like,

12:22

Yeah. I want you there. And so

12:24

III assume and when it's

12:27

think

12:27

it's, like, almost working out.

12:28

Like, your dad was, like, I want that every night.

12:30

Of

12:30

course. Yeah. I'm gonna go to Florida. But it's

12:32

almost like where when I've done exercise

12:35

at points, I've gotten a dick that addiction

12:37

to not to That was amazing at

12:39

it. I'm just saying, I remember that feeling where it's like,

12:41

no. No. I have to go to

12:43

the gym. And if you don't do that for

12:45

a week, it's you remember that thing where it's like,

12:48

I'm not gonna go. Like, I got fifteen minutes

12:50

free in my day. I'm not going to the fucking gym for

12:52

it where other time you'd be like, I gotta do it.

12:55

And I just think like you fought a habit and I think

12:57

his life just became easier. He's not right.

12:59

He's wrong. He's actually a shitty father

13:02

when I was a kid for that many ways.

13:04

But I get it all. So you know what I'm saying? Oh, you're

13:06

just like yeah. At twenty two, you decide to be

13:08

like, I don't have to take care of this kid

13:10

really, like, oh, then fuck it. But

13:13

then he went to Florida and had two more kids.

13:16

So he came back like outside

13:18

of Philly after Florida. And

13:21

I was my first stepmother, Kathy, and she had

13:23

kids. She was great. I actually liked her

13:25

a lot. And

13:28

So he's seeing you how often now. Week?

13:31

He's supposed to be every other week. I'd

13:33

say the real estimate

13:35

will probably be, like, once a month, maybe

13:37

maybe. But he's within driving distance

13:40

now, local for forty five an hour, maybe

13:42

somebody at Delaware, one point, like, South

13:44

Jersey and everything we were in West Philly.

13:47

What's funny is when we went moving to South Jersey,

13:49

I'm like, wow. It's like we really move right to where he was

13:51

sort of but he was already gone.

13:53

But I used with her for a while and then

13:56

started seeing,

13:59

I think, a lady at work and his company's

14:01

was based out of Ohio. He

14:04

was like a travel. He drove around. He drives

14:07

a truck and goes and tests such a

14:09

weird job. It's an environmental job, weirdly, but

14:11

it's testing underground diesel tanks

14:13

for leaks. Okay. So he, like,

14:15

has to do his run up his test. He goes and runs

14:17

this weird probe test and And

14:20

he goes and he's traveling a bunch in the headquarters

14:22

was Ohio. And he met,

14:24

I think, my current stepmother there, and

14:27

then left my first stepmother for

14:29

her and just became an Ohio guy

14:31

overnight. And then I

14:33

saw him once a year like, the summer

14:36

times maybe. That was it was an arbitrary he would

14:38

take me, but he, like, lived as and he also I

14:40

felt was just in the way. My stepmother

14:42

didn't dig me very much. Would

14:44

you get as I've gotten older sympathy for, like, I was

14:46

probably an annoying fat kid. Like, I

14:48

used to think let's say our mean things. I'm like,

14:51

This lady would, like, make me feel awkward

14:53

like she would hide the snacks in, like,

14:55

a closet in her room because

14:57

I would eat too many of the snacks. And then as

14:59

I have to think

15:00

back, I'm like, I was killing myself, just

15:03

shoveling snacks in my face.

15:04

But also because the guy she's married

15:06

to now fucking bailed on you and you're probably

15:08

eating feelings. You're

15:09

all good right back for

15:10

sure. You know what I mean? She was not too bad.

15:12

No. No. No. I'm saying she was. It's all on us.

15:14

Like, I feel like we're that generation that

15:16

really is trying to break these fucking kind

15:19

of

15:19

cycles. Like, I don't wanna be a shitty dad

15:21

like that guy. It's

15:21

scary. Yeah. But then also to have the balance

15:24

to be like, I fucking get it. You were twenty three

15:26

years old. Dude, I don't blame you.

15:28

Like, they don't even have that. You know what really

15:30

do? I don't Oh, I probably do. I have, like,

15:32

resentment stuff towards my dad ultimately, but,

15:34

like, It's funny when I tell

15:36

these stories like over the years of my dad

15:38

and some of the goofy shit he's done with

15:41

me as a father I always come

15:44

back to him, like, so they go, and one

15:46

of those people come on the road with me and I

15:48

go, so my dad's running up. My dad anything

15:50

in a two hour drive he's at the show.

15:52

Oh, now he's there. He

15:55

loves

15:55

some of the designs. loves being Gary, dude.

15:57

He loves being Gary, and he takes pictures with

15:59

the fans.

16:01

He doesn't really fully grasp by the way that I'm, like,

16:03

they're kinda laughing at him. But like

16:05

But they don't they don't No investment whatsoever,

16:08

but let me re fall the reward.

16:10

All up in there.

16:11

Oh, okay. He knows why there's such characters,

16:13

like, in my storytelling too, that,

16:15

like, when he brought Diane, my stepmother the

16:17

one time to pickwick

16:20

Sickler and frolic. Someone

16:23

goes he goes, oh, we gotta have Gary.

16:25

We gotta have big Gary in the picture and he

16:27

goes, oh, is it with the mean stepmom

16:30

to like, they're they're characters. Oh. The mean

16:32

step. And my stepmom just

16:33

like, she just pops into,

16:35

like So

16:40

Yeah. So I do have sympathy for Harlow, but I get I

16:42

was, like, a child. I was a kid and,

16:44

like But then he has two boys with her.

16:46

She's not very warm. And then yeah. And then what it

16:48

is is you just feel think it's like the classic

16:51

like, well, I'm just a reminder of, like, his old lightweight.

16:54

We got a family here, basically. Which

16:56

she said one time, which was insane

16:58

when he said that. But I was like, no, not him.

17:01

I was like nine I started comedy. So it's probably

17:03

nineteen, I just started. And I was

17:05

like, oh, you know, it won't press my I was still there. I'm like,

17:07

you know, it won't press this guy and get him would be, like, stoked.

17:09

Like, I'm gonna call comedy

17:12

club there and see if I could do some guest spots.

17:14

On that weekend. And I did.

17:17

It was it was Lisa

17:19

Lampanelli was headlining. I didn't know

17:21

her at all. And I

17:23

went through the guest spots. And she

17:27

while we were up there, my dad goes,

17:30

Oh, he was he told me he was, like, bring some

17:32

nice clothes because we're

17:35

taking they're doing, like, Sickler. Like

17:37

you were taking professional pictures and I was like, I don't

17:40

even wanna do that, but I'm like, okay. So

17:42

I bring them when we go and it's my

17:44

dad, my stepmom, their two kids were

17:46

pretty little at that point. It's

17:49

like twenty some years ago. And and,

17:52

like, you know, her brother her families

17:54

often there. So they're her brothers and their families

17:56

and her sister and their found all the kids.

17:59

And my dad married and to

18:01

a woman. So that's the Oakerson family

18:04

there. And they

18:06

were like, okay. The Oakland is now coming up to the thing,

18:08

and I'm excited with my girlfriend. I don't even think this is lame

18:10

anyway, and I'm like, I gotta

18:12

go. I said, go in there and she my stepmother

18:14

goes, like, oh,

18:16

no. I thought I meant, like, our family,

18:18

like that. And I was, like, in front of my, like, girl friends

18:20

are like, and I just do, like, the yeah.

18:22

No. It's like, I don't even wanna take pictures anyway.

18:25

I'm like, yay. The

18:28

first time she saw me do comedy. She said

18:30

Yeah. She said the first time she saw me do

18:32

comedy, like, where I was, like,

18:35

confident. Like, I was doing well. It wasn't like I had an

18:37

audience, like, a personal audience yet, but,

18:39

like, I could do well in the in the clubs when

18:41

I went on and it was, like, a sold out something

18:43

in New York that came out. They came out for my wedding.

18:46

And I came out to a sold out show, like, Stan, York

18:48

or somebody had a good set. Great set.

18:50

For what I remember. And she comes

18:52

outside and she was, like, I just don't understand why

18:54

it's gotta be, like, so dirty. It was, like, first words,

18:57

it's gotta be so dirty. It's, like, eighty.

18:59

I get it. It's not for

19:00

you, but, like, can you just acknowledge it? Like,

19:03

it went well. Yeah. Like, everywhere

19:05

else is kinda like, hey, that's neat. You know, my

19:07

mother came to a show in Baltimore where I was featuring

19:09

for Segora back when he was still doing

19:11

clubs and she came out and she's

19:13

like, you were okay. He's really

19:15

funny.

19:16

And it's this

19:16

ongoing thing now that Segora is

19:18

my mom's favorite fucking movie. That's

19:23

what she said. I was like, Jesus Christ.

19:25

I'm one of the founders even invited. You

19:28

just

19:28

came. I have one of the funniest

19:31

of that is jot you know, John Rudnitsky.

19:33

Mhmm. Great dude. Very

19:35

funny. His mom look,

19:38

she's my biggest fan. Like, when he

19:40

moved to New York, they they would come to the shows a bunch

19:42

because he moved out for S and L. His

19:44

mom just and she is a permanent pro she

19:47

said she said she said I don't like dirty stuff

19:49

at all. She goes behind her something and she just loves

19:51

my Philthy Charlie. It's so

19:53

funny though, and she's such a sweet lady. It's

19:56

funny we turned somebody like that. But

19:58

oh, that's what I was saying. My dad, they don't know the story

20:00

so much. And stuff like I've told people

20:02

stuff like, you know, that story. And then people

20:05

you're with my dad, they're just Oakerson

20:07

wait, I'm gonna meet this guy and I have to club it. What's he?

20:09

And I go, no. No. No. Charming

20:11

is all I'm like, you're gonna love him. I go, he's a great

20:13

hang. He shoots the shit and I

20:15

step mom dips off. He'll, like, smoke cigarettes

20:17

and talk shit still or smoke pot even

20:19

stuff. But another thing

20:21

I thought he gave me was good was responsibility with

20:26

drugs probably. Because my

20:28

dad's a pothead always. Not anymore, but, like,

20:30

all through my time I remember as

20:32

a kid. And I quote

20:35

unquote catch him several times, you know, walk in on several

20:37

times. And then when we have a long when he moved

20:39

to Ohio, when he picked me up to drive me there

20:41

for the summer for a couple weeks, he

20:43

ain't doing that long of a car ride without smoking

20:46

one. And For real.

20:48

Yeah. You would smoke a joy while he's driving

20:51

you? know, we were in

20:53

a by the way, none of that. Tell about not

20:55

knowing your kid. I'm a little fat

20:57

kid, and he shows up to show off. He

20:59

always likes stuff like this too. He's like, we

21:01

get into, like, a classic stingray

21:04

corvette. Oh my god. Yeah. Yeah.

21:06

With my suitcase for the summer,

21:09

mean, it's like and my dad was a bigger guy

21:11

too, like, smaller than me, but, like,

21:13

bigger guy and, like, you know, just Sickler like,

21:16

this, like, squeezed up in a stingray for you as

21:18

well. I have such a visual of, like,

21:20

going down the road, he's smoking a joint out the

21:22

window. A joint and looking at me and looking

21:24

at me and giving me at, like, I

21:27

wanna I'll be fair and say thirteen

21:29

or fourteen. It may have been little younger,

21:31

but he's giving me the when

21:33

you did an idea, I'd rather you do this than drink

21:36

because it was from the earth. I remember that's the

21:38

first time I heard, like, from the earth thing, and I'm

21:40

like, I'm like, alright, I guess.

21:42

Like, it just seems weird. Like,

21:45

was over explaining so much that's how I knew it was

21:47

something bad. Yeah. I mean, we're always

21:49

just equated like pot with being just

21:51

like something that like

21:53

a idiot does. Yeah. And because it was always

21:55

like kind of his thing that I I didn't know the correlation,

21:57

but because of that, I didn't really smoke

22:01

until I was, like, twenty three. I did a few

22:03

times. And then and then when I was probably about twenty

22:05

seven or so, it was when I became, like, an

22:07

everyday, like, thought Oakerson.

22:09

And While I do

22:11

say I really would have loved to

22:13

see the go back, it

22:16

wouldn't be a good idea, but I would love to see the

22:18

outcome of smoking pot in high school because

22:20

I'm like, man, maybe that's why

22:22

it wasn't that awesome. I didn't see that.

22:24

Pot in high school. That would have been really fun. Like,

22:26

just go take I probably would have been more interested

22:29

in, like, the history thing. You agree. No.

22:31

Why? They do agree so

22:33

much. Instead, I was just, like,

22:35

look and then Before I just looking out the

22:37

window, like, can we leave here? I hate this.

22:40

I had so many friends that would get high, go

22:42

to class, and stuff, or even trip on acid.

22:45

They tell me later, I'm like,

22:45

yes, we're on that. And I'm not doing any of

22:47

that shit.

22:48

I'm drinking.

22:49

I'm drinking, but I'm not doing any week.

22:51

He's not gonna talk to anyone. Don't be a zone in.

22:53

But don't drink I go to school either because they're

22:55

gonna smell up before all the fuckers are high and

22:57

on acid and shrooms and shit. I'm like,

22:59

what? So great. What? Now when do you like

23:01

So never but I do believe because I I never really

23:03

found a problem with, like, any drugs

23:06

or even drinking because I just

23:09

just didn't do it until then by time I did it and I was

23:11

like, oh, this is pretty fun. was at an a also

23:13

having a kid young and getting into

23:15

those things after that -- Mhmm. -- was kinda

23:17

like, yeah. It's like, I'll have a couple shots

23:20

in a beer if I'm not driving. But then most of

23:22

the time, it's like, you wanna

23:24

do a shot I'd say no to the first

23:26

one, not because I'm like a goodie. It was because,

23:29

like, well, I don't get the point of doing one.

23:31

Like, now that I get it, like, I do a few shots

23:33

and get loose But if I'm not gonna do that, it's

23:35

gross. And I have to drive,

23:38

like, home at the end of night and take care of a

23:40

baby when I was little and then as she got older

23:42

and older. So I just didn't do it. And then

23:44

By the time I had that freedom to kind of do it, it was

23:46

like a responsible, my

23:47

hope, age, although I'm getting charged

23:50

for smoking in my hotel room here.

23:51

Are you really? Yeah. Yeah. We

23:53

either a cigarette. We I would never do

23:55

cigarette in the hotel room for my own. don't smoke inside

23:57

my house right now. That's

23:58

great. They're really charging you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

24:00

They go they the worst thing is Bert

24:02

and then put us up. So Bert's

24:04

tour manager, I know thank God. Call me day

24:06

and said, they're gonna charge the two.

24:08

I was like, oh, yeah. It happens once in a while

24:10

ago, I'll pay it. How much is it? Two fifty?

24:12

That's not bad. It's

24:14

not even

24:15

written weed all week in there. And

24:17

then I I

24:17

was gonna say if I paid to if I know and I'll be

24:19

like, I'll pay to

24:20

till Friday. You gotta stay right in my room then.

24:22

I tomorrow morning,

24:25

I leave. And I got the call right before I

24:27

came here, and it was like, yeah. I was like, yeah.

24:29

I said, yeah. It happens sometimes. Yeah. I'll pay it.

24:32

And then she goes, and they just just

24:34

say though, like, if they smell it

24:36

happen again, like, gonna ask you to leave the hotel

24:38

and I'm like, so

24:41

right on the edge. Because you

24:43

know what? You know what I mean? It's like, Yeah. If I do

24:46

at midnight, is

24:48

it gonna be a problem? Like, I I think this

24:50

happens smoke today before I left -- Mhmm. -- for

24:52

the first thing. So there's this housekeeping still

24:54

there. I'm like, to a daigou. I

24:56

definitely wanna be kicked out of the hotel at two o'clock

24:58

in the morning, but we'll

25:00

see. Alright. So now let's talk

25:02

about you getting married. Mhmm.

25:05

Married first before you have a

25:06

baby? No. No. Classic white

25:08

trashy. She was a she was a flower

25:10

girl who What? Was it?

25:13

Those fires. Yeah. Yeah. She was

25:15

five or six when we got

25:16

married. remember when my daughter's mother was,

25:18

like, we were talking about like, a wedding and

25:20

stuff. And I was like, well, if we do

25:21

that, then the kids won't be in the wedding. She's like, your kids

25:24

aren't supposed to be in your wedding. I was like, oh, yeah.

25:26

There's that.

25:27

They're not. No.

25:28

Yeah. Yeah. Sure. There's no show we're

25:30

going traditional? Alright. We're not

25:32

traditional. Class. Yeah. We never even

25:34

got pub. Alright. Publop dinner? No. You guys

25:36

don't do that. I've been in the family

25:38

weddings

25:39

where, like, somebody in the family did the cooking

25:41

and, like, it's those tin foil trays

25:43

with can't leave a little bit of a flower

25:46

crock pot over there. That's it. You

25:49

silly too. It's like, yeah, lo loose roast

25:51

beef sandwiches. There's always a

25:53

dry as eatie. Yeah.

25:57

A dry as eatie. Meatball do see their

25:59

better day. So

26:03

when did okay. So you guys were together for how

26:06

long before you got married? I

26:09

thought it was probably seven

26:11

years. Okay. I wanna say and,

26:14

like, yeah, seven or eight years and

26:16

it was was doing

26:18

so much like, others

26:20

I just wrote stuff. I think I got

26:22

caught in something pretty

26:25

bad. Well, I don't think I did. I thought it

26:27

was before that. Really bad.

26:30

Thought maybe we might break up then, but even

26:32

I didn't want to again because it kinda came down

26:34

to 1II love my ex

26:36

wife if I still. She's great. You know what I

26:38

mean? She's a there's nothing with her with all.

26:40

Like me in this I'm not even

26:42

absorbing her a blame of anything in the relationship.

26:45

Going apart. But I'm saying for me, for sure, I was

26:47

never, like, all in

26:49

without doing, like, some grimy shit

26:51

to some degree. But

26:54

after I got caught with that when we decided to stay

26:56

together, and I was just doing

26:58

things kinda like maybe here and there. I was trying to be a

27:00

little better at, like, you know, I'm not having a side like,

27:02

life or girlfriend and just, like,

27:05

fuck on the road little bit and not make it a big

27:07

deal. And and I

27:09

was feeling so good about, like, maintaining

27:11

that for a bit that I was like, yeah,

27:14

we should we should make this kid

27:16

have a family. You know, I mean, isabella should have, like, a

27:18

family be a family, although you wanna get and she

27:20

so stoked that you yes immediately. And

27:23

but he was asked, like, while I was, like, smoking out,

27:25

like, my sliding glass doors and my thing.

27:29

She was planning by an hour later. Yeah.

27:32

I swear to you. I was

27:33

like, hey. Hey, Carla. You

27:36

wanna say fuck it and get married? What do you think?

27:39

throw party, famous

27:41

last words. And

27:45

then, yeah, so we did. was a great man. It

27:47

was such a fun memory. The wedding was fucking

27:49

great. But, yeah, then we

27:52

and you were together for about four years before

27:54

you split. You said she was your daughter was around

27:56

twelve? Well, we're still

27:58

currently not divorced and still in all going

28:01

processed till because that is our only

28:03

kinda headbutt at all. It's like it's

28:05

not even a headbutt. Like, She

28:08

just she has a another child who's

28:11

great with somebody else

28:13

afterwards, and she's not with him anymore.

28:15

She had a boyfriend for while now. I don't

28:17

think it's like a romantic thing, but

28:20

when I whenever it's like, hey, you gotta, like,

28:23

sign is that you have to respond to his email.

28:25

Like, it's, you know, I might wanna buy a house one

28:27

day. Like, I don't want it to be half yours.

28:29

So, again, it's weird. We've

28:31

been broken up for shit eleven

28:34

year, ten years. And

28:37

so, you know, it but she's, like, whenever it's, like so

28:39

you gotta do this. That's when it's

28:41

contentious. So

28:43

that's

28:43

what's our reason for if you're can

28:45

even talk about it. What's our reason for wanting to

28:47

stay married? If

28:50

I could tell you, III don't don't think

28:52

it's that she really even cares about

28:54

staying married. I don't think she wants to get

28:56

divorced.

28:56

I see. Does that make sense? I don't think she wants to be a

28:58

divorce. It's like -- Yeah. -- I think she

29:01

views it as like a failure maybe in some way

29:03

or something. But, like, you know, I'm always

29:05

like, about your other daughter that wouldn't exist

29:07

if I didn't do all these wonderfully terrible things.

29:09

Yeah. You don't get that up.

29:11

Yeah. If I didn't cheat on

29:13

you, this angel wouldn't

29:15

exist. So think about

29:17

that next time you

29:18

start pointing your fingers. So when

29:21

you What's your first

29:23

night like alone with your daughter? She's twelve.

29:25

I mean, she's coming to your place. What's

29:28

that like? That took a

29:29

minute. That took a minute too. That was, again,

29:31

you talk about those, like, father things you, like and

29:33

somebody shouldn't even realize you do them. It's, like, I'm glad

29:36

my daughter feels comfortable with talk to me.

29:39

About it, but, like, it was

29:41

her birthday a couple years ago. We were

29:43

out. Her mom got a little zipped.

29:46

And started taking some, like, quiet shots

29:48

at me. She wanted

29:50

her to go to college, my daughter and I have

29:52

much more of, like, oh, I'm like, I'll pay for you

29:54

to go to college. You're gonna go to college. What do you wanna go college

29:57

for? I'm like, and she doesn't know. So I'm

29:59

like, why wouldn't you just arbitrarily go to college

30:01

anymore? I'm like, like, do whatever you wanna do.

30:03

As a

30:03

college graduate, I completely agree.

30:05

Yeah. I'm, like, I've had that conversation. like,

30:07

if you

30:07

wanna go if you wanna do nursing or

30:09

something, I'm, like, it's a prerequisite. What's it for the

30:11

career -- Yes. -- but if it's not fair

30:13

to go and she's also and again, it's the difference

30:16

to, like, her mother is an academic. For

30:20

sure. You know what I mean? But

30:22

she's and I'm not

30:24

an academic. I'm much more of a creative.

30:27

And my daughter just falls more on that

30:29

side of the fish. She's a great artist. You know what I mean?

30:31

But, like, she doesn't really see what the career

30:33

would be in that necessarily, and she doesn't really know

30:35

what she wants to do. So she's gonna go to aesthetician school now.

30:37

Like, fantastic. That's tangible. You'll

30:40

make money in that in little bit, you know. Like,

30:42

instead of just taking, like, psych

30:44

101 because you have no idea what you're

30:46

taking. And but

30:49

she was taken, like, these kinda little

30:51

pot shots at me. And

30:53

it did come up. The story came up, and I was like, you know

30:56

when you left? Like, you

30:58

told Isabella that

31:00

which he asked why you were taking the TV.

31:03

You said that you were house sitting for a friend for

31:05

a little bit, and he didn't have a TV. So

31:08

that and I was, like, I do

31:10

sort of remember when they said it, but I sort of

31:12

got blocked it out. It was probably the wrong way. I just sort of forgot

31:14

because there's so many things I have. It was such a depressing

31:16

and sad time, even though it it's

31:19

what I wanted ultimately, it was so depressing

31:21

and sad, and I felt terrible.

31:24

And Yeah. My daughter was like,

31:26

yeah. Yeah. You did and I was like, yeah. But, like and

31:29

then I corrected that at some point, and it was like,

31:31

nope. That was, like, never you just never lived

31:33

back in the house again. And I was like, damn.

31:36

So say, hey, I might bring up my go, yeah, I did that

31:38

all hundred percent wrong. That's not even it

31:40

was the busiest way to handle it. Like, my daughter

31:43

heard me say that. So, like, think she appreciates

31:45

that. You know what I mean? Yeah. Especially come on Friday. apologize

31:48

to her for things that think are like, you

31:50

know what I mean? And I'd always hear anything that she

31:52

was like upset

31:53

with, and I was like, Yeah. Deserve all that shit.

31:55

You don't get born till your parents split up.

31:57

Is that right? So then III

31:59

think of things like that. And then I think

32:01

of, like, when when we split, my daughter

32:03

was one. She was like, no, I'm not doing this.

32:06

So all my daughter has known

32:08

is back and forth fifty fifty. So

32:10

I can't decide. If that's better

32:12

to know it like that the whole time. Like, I remember

32:15

my daughter said to me one time she was like three

32:17

or four and she said, Something

32:20

about living together like a real family. And I

32:22

said, listen to me, we are a real family.

32:24

Sure. I said, these people, your neighbors that

32:26

live next door to each other, who live

32:29

together these people above you or

32:31

in these neighborhoods around you just because

32:33

they live in the same under the same

32:35

roof does not mean they're a good

32:37

family. Doesn't mean they're healthy family.

32:39

Doesn't mean they have all the shit that

32:41

you really want. I'm telling

32:43

you, don't ever say that again and shit out that

32:45

pretty quick. No. That's good too. And

32:47

I feel the same way with her

32:49

mom too. I'm like, oh, wait. This is your family. We're your

32:51

family. You know? You get

32:53

married one day, mean your mother are gonna

32:55

be, you know, and not at each other's throats.

32:57

That's not the way anybody wants to be. No.

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34:49

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34:51

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35:47

Now, let's

35:48

get back to the doo. But

35:50

did it take you getting some used to

35:53

to not only I mean, to be a single

35:55

data also

35:56

is, like, you got this child that comes

35:58

over all the time. Well, it's an interesting thing. Well,

36:00

she wasn't over all the time. That's kinda interesting

36:03

thing. It would be, like, more eventually

36:05

did start coming and staying over. Sometimes.

36:09

I think her mom was a little uncomfortable. You know,

36:11

she's also essentially taking

36:13

her to someone's house. Yeah.

36:16

She my ex wife to her credit. There's

36:18

TV there though. Yeah. My

36:21

ex wife my ex wife to her credit

36:24

really did for the

36:26

longest time, like, the

36:28

best she could and really good at, like

36:32

I mean, my girlfriend essentially is, like, I

36:34

didn't leave her for her. He

36:37

was just meeting my girlfriend was the

36:39

thing that I know. I was like, oh, that's like I'm just

36:41

more in line with what

36:43

I wanna do in life and some things

36:45

with her. Do you know

36:47

what I mean? So it's like It's

36:49

not an anger at

36:52

the other

36:52

one, trying to think of where my head is at. It's

36:54

just a bad pot head with remembering what

36:56

was talking about

36:57

as I tangent off Well, I was asking

36:59

you if it took you some time to get used

37:01

to, like, co parenting and being cool

37:03

with her and then also when your daughter started

37:06

coming over. What I did more in

37:08

the beginning, which was so, you

37:11

know, it's difficult as

37:13

well. It's like, there is something to

37:15

I've I tell my daughter in like a joking

37:17

fashion, but she also knows it's like an actual

37:20

thing. But I don't regret a second of it. I

37:22

never want her to think that. But I'm like, oh,

37:24

having Her so young

37:26

certainly slowed my career

37:28

down. How young were you? was born

37:30

twenty four. Yeah. It's

37:31

young. And I just turned twenty four

37:33

too. It was our month and the twenty four. It's

37:36

our two months. She's and, yeah,

37:38

it was like, when everyone I knew was

37:40

like, wanna go head to LA for

37:42

a couple weeks and couch surf. And when I was, like,

37:45

no. I gotta go do black circuit shows and make HoneyDew.

37:47

Like like, you know what I mean? So I really couldn't

37:50

So it did for sure. But

37:53

so when I left and,

37:56

you know, my ex it was it was

37:58

not contentious right away, but like she was

38:00

mad with me for sure understandably so.

38:03

We still communicated and everything, but she was

38:05

not super cycled. What I was able to do

38:08

was it did free me up. And I was wondering

38:10

if it was maybe mentally. My girlfriend said this

38:12

before and she it may

38:14

be right. Like, also, there's a thing that maybe

38:17

I didn't push to find the

38:20

next level of, like, success or anything because,

38:22

like, the fear of, like, much

38:24

am I gonna bury myself into something I'm

38:26

not sure if it's what I wanna be in the rest

38:28

of my life. So I'm like, are we gonna buy house now? We have

38:30

assets. We're gonna buy the you know what I mean? I was worried

38:32

about that. And started

38:34

thinking about that. No. No. No. No. No. like, when I'm stunting

38:37

her life too from finding those

38:39

things, so I kinda split. But

38:42

the co

38:44

parenting was really and again, much credit

38:46

to my ex, she really

38:48

took the reins of, like, It

38:51

was rare that I was picking her up from

38:54

practices. She lives in Long Island too. I was

38:56

in I lived moved to Manhattan. And

38:58

for the first couple of years until I started making

39:00

some dope, I didn't have a car. So I was like, I have

39:02

take the thing to the subway the long

39:05

railroad an hour and a half hour, and I did

39:07

it a lot. I but I didn't

39:09

see it. And when I I kinda put my nose to the

39:11

grindstone more of work and really

39:14

that sometimes becomes a point of attention too.

39:17

Almost all of my filing,

39:19

like, success as far as, like, financially,

39:22

like, I'm not underwater and I'm doing

39:24

alright. Happened after I left, which

39:26

I don't know creates resentment for sure.

39:29

But because of that, the co parenting

39:31

tends to long way around to get

39:33

to the answer of that, is I

39:36

wasn't as present as

39:39

I would have been living there and not even

39:41

like you know, she came

39:43

over every other weekend thing, but I was able

39:45

to finally, like, yeah,

39:47

put her in that private school for sure. You

39:49

wanna put her in a private school? Put her in that private school. How

39:51

much does that? Like, what? Girls across

39:53

cost three thousand dollars to join. I'm like,

39:55

alright. Well, here and I'm doing all

39:57

of it. So I'm saying, took care of the movement

39:59

stuff. I made sure they had a car that

40:02

was paid for, and they didn't have to worry about

40:04

that. So I was I felt

40:06

for, like, one of the first times we

40:08

always got by together, but I was

40:10

able to provide almost for the first time.

40:12

And it's, like, send them on

40:14

vacations with my

40:16

daughter's sister and stuff

40:18

to go see. And like and

40:21

that's been good. I think she, like, I don't

40:23

think she appreciates it enough. But that's probably

40:25

the most interesting. It's the best

40:27

did you ever see. Did you

40:29

ever see the there's a great cutaway

40:31

in family an episode

40:34

of Family Guy, if you're a fan, and

40:36

it's Dewey. It

40:38

says, like, oh, now we gotta go to the park

40:40

and look at all of the divorced

40:42

dads playing for

40:44

their hour with their kids or something. And as

40:46

a guy pushing a little girl, like, way too,

40:48

like, hard, like, almost aggressively on a swing,

40:51

And he goes, hey. He goes, Halza.

40:53

He goes, those are really cute shoes you got. Do

40:55

they cost twenty five hundred dollars a month? Because

40:58

that's what I'm giving your mother. I mean, he's like, this is

41:00

a shoving thing. Where

41:04

do you think about child support too? It was like, if

41:06

your kids heard that you talked about it and you go,

41:08

it's like, You go, is that too much money

41:10

to spend on your kid? And you go, it's not don't

41:12

look at it that way. What is It's

41:15

probably less or comparable to

41:17

what I spend on you anyway. It's just never laid

41:19

out like, you know what I mean? It's like twenty

41:21

five hundred. It's probably not that much

41:23

of a thing, but you're like, you don't really see it like

41:26

here's this bulk. But then you realize that's, you know,

41:28

she's eating all month and all that kind of shit.

41:30

Medical bills. Well, I never had like

41:33

like, a quarter of child support or anything, I just

41:35

always I

41:36

mean, I kept the receipts, but

41:39

in case that ever get but, I mean, But

41:41

now your

41:41

child's an adult. And now she's twenty. And

41:44

that's funny now she's out of the house. I'm like, you know,

41:46

and

41:46

what's your relationship like now? If she's on

41:48

the shows, Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She loves. Yeah.

41:50

Yeah. Yeah. We gotta keep her. Lewis

41:52

Jacob is the star. He's, like, him and Dave,

41:55

my partners asked literally because they're

41:57

having a hard time and I get it, they're

41:59

not wrong. They just noticed when she

42:01

was a baby, like a literal baby.

42:03

So they're having a hard time being them

42:06

their gross and whatever stories were telling

42:08

selves when she's there. Yeah.

42:10

There's definitely the thing she was there for. I was like,

42:12

I wish she wasn't there for that. But for the most part,

42:16

she's twenty. I just I do. I see her as twenty.

42:18

I still feel like I I still see her as a kid if it

42:20

makes sense. Yeah. But I also know

42:22

her, and I trust her in a way where it's

42:24

just, like, I don't know.

42:27

Like, the I said the last time she was there, though,

42:29

they were, like, they pulled me outside there, dude.

42:31

I go, alright. I'll tell her to take a break from comment.

42:33

She just loves, like, she likes it. Brings her

42:35

friends and they think it's great. And

42:39

because I'm having hard time in that show circumstantially,

42:43

It's got named Byron who was auditioning to

42:45

be an intern, sucked his own

42:47

dick on stage.

42:49

I don't know. He got the job. He did.

42:52

I remember looking over. I

42:55

remember looking over my dog eyes being gone.

42:59

And

42:59

I'm like, well, point made, guys. I

43:01

won't bring her anymore.

43:02

Oh, ask her to to dial it for

43:04

me. I'll ask

43:05

her to maybe steer clear a little bit. No.

43:07

She always wants to come to the festival we do

43:09

and

43:11

It's good. My relationship partner, I

43:13

I said, I really, really love

43:15

it's funny, like, the the the years that I wasn't,

43:17

like, everyday with her. Again,

43:20

it was such a switch because we did. That's

43:22

she was my butt I got I was young too. So,

43:24

like, when she got to, like, eight

43:26

years old, nine, and ten, it was, like,

43:29

I can go get, like, Lego, Indiana

43:32

Jones, games, and stuff like that. just come we should come

43:34

from school and, like, I'd help her rush through our homework so

43:36

we can, like, play Like, she was my buddy, it was

43:38

great. I love that, that we had that,

43:40

and being with her mother longer

43:42

than I was for that is more

43:44

than worth that. More and more

43:46

than worth it. And and then to kinda

43:49

skip to now, it's like, I think

43:51

it's so cool. She'll call me one of the things. She's like, I

43:53

have my roommates out on a date, like, Like, what are

43:55

you doing? You wanna, like, watch TV? Or or

43:57

you don't wanna watch a

43:58

movie? You

43:58

know? She's close to show to you? Like, she'll come over.

44:02

Well, She's not she's in Brooklyn. I'm in Manhattan,

44:04

and she's kinda out in Brooklyn. So it's

44:06

a crazy train ride, but

44:08

she knows She knows, like,

44:11

how much I want her to love me. So

44:13

I was like, you know, she definitely give, like,

44:16

it's just probably gonna take me, like, two hours

44:18

on the train. Like, I'll get you a fucking

44:21

Uber, you dickhead because she knows.

44:23

But, I mean, the fact that she, like, I love that. She

44:25

wants to hang out. Yeah. We go to several

44:27

Sickler games a

44:28

year. We, like, go to concerts. She comes to concerts

44:30

with us. Like,

44:32

can't wait for that. It was a great time to

44:34

she knows I smoke weed. I got caught. By

44:36

her, which is a funny one. How

44:38

was she? And I called her. It's funny. I rectified

44:41

it really because I said we were talking earlier about this stuff of my

44:43

dad. Funny how it hit. She

44:45

was seventeen. She was living

44:47

with her mom. And I was texting with her

44:49

one that I just bullshitting. And my friend

44:52

Wayne, I was going to his house, but I was running late.

44:55

Mhmm. So this isn't even

44:57

true when I'm texting him, but I

44:59

just wanted to make an excuse

45:02

for running late, I go, hey, I'm just gonna

45:04

roll a few more joints and

45:07

go to the and then stop by the deli. You want anything

45:09

from the deli? And then I don't

45:12

like, look at it and then I get the, you know, the vibration

45:14

comes and I look and it's my daughter text me and

45:16

she goes, get me a sandwich dog.

45:19

And I wrote back and I wrote back I

45:22

I clearly see that. I remember, like, holly grabbing a

45:24

conversation, like, in person. I

45:26

went, and then I felt so

45:28

stupid for that. More than even the fuck up,

45:31

for texting and treating her so stupid is

45:33

to be like, what? I didn't even send

45:35

that. That must be a mistake. I just called

45:37

right away and I was like, alright. Dad

45:39

spoke spot. Let's talk.

45:42

And I was who was cool about that? Because I was also

45:44

able to tell her I go. And just so you know, like, my dad, I told

45:46

her the whole thing I just told you and I

45:48

was, like, and I really didn't start smoking with

45:50

any regularity. I was like twenty seven years

45:52

old. I tell I just had this conversation with

45:54

my daughter because unfortunately friend of ours,

45:56

his daughter got a hotshot in Baltimore,

45:59

and she died of fentanyl. Oh.

46:01

And he came to visit us.

46:03

And, you know, he was crying. I was crying.

46:05

I was like, how are you doing? And he's like, you know, we're doing

46:07

good. And so then she asked me, and we

46:10

we flew into Philly and drove down the

46:12

ocean city. That's where we went, Maryland. And

46:14

on the ride back. She's like, why was he

46:16

crying and what was going on? I was like, alright. You know

46:19

what? It was that same long ride. I

46:21

was like, this is what's going on. So I explained

46:23

to her about ventinol. And I'm

46:25

like, you're in elementary school. I know you have

46:27

friends who have older

46:30

siblings. Like, if you see any pills,

46:32

take any of that. And then I was like, I smoke marijuana,

46:35

and I explained to her that marijuana is

46:37

medicine. Even with what I just

46:39

went through, these doctors are telling me it's okay to

46:41

smoke and If I prefer that

46:43

to Xanax, then go ahead. And I have

46:45

talking about that recorded so

46:47

that she can hear real doctors

46:49

say, hey, this thing is can

46:51

be used as medicine.

46:52

Yeah. You don't like demonize anything that I told her, I was

46:54

like, you're getting a different education and probably every

46:56

kid in your elementary school is getting about marijuana.

46:59

Oh, yeah. She's like, how come this and that? And I was

47:01

like, well, there's a difference between medicinal

47:03

and recreational. And some people just they

47:05

don't wanna get up and make studios and

47:07

podcasts. They just wanna lay on

47:08

the fucking couch and watch sports center. Yeah. I was,

47:11

like, charged two hundred and fifty dollars in a stupid

47:13

hotel.

47:13

Yeah. Yeah. I

47:16

know it's funny my daughter, and people say I'm

47:18

naive. I

47:19

don't think I am. I I I'm certain.

47:22

There's elements of my daughter that I'm

47:25

unaware

47:25

of. She's

47:27

told me she would not involve me in

47:29

anything with guys she's talking to

47:31

or dating or God forbid

47:34

hooking up with? So she doesn't bring any

47:36

boyfriends to your shows or anything like --

47:37

Never. -- I've never

47:38

met a boyfriend. I wouldn't even be if

47:40

you asked me if she was date, it ever

47:43

went on a date with a guy. I

47:44

go, I've I've seen no evidence of

47:46

that, but I'm sure she has.

47:48

Yeah. But she's kept Exactly. And

47:50

friends of mine who

47:52

she's close with also. She, like, does some, like,

47:54

system worked for once in a while. My

47:57

friend, Michelle, she confides in Michelle. Michelle

47:59

doesn't, like, tell me anything, but she's, like, of course,

48:01

she dates and there's guys she's interested in

48:04

but she told me she's like, no, I

48:06

will not bring a guy around you

48:08

until I wanna, like,

48:10

be serious with him. And I was like, why

48:13

can't we feel? Because you're gonna, like, terrify

48:15

them right away. And she doesn't mean, like because

48:17

she knows I'm not, like, my baby girl

48:19

better be home. Like, I'm not that person. She's just, like, you're

48:21

gonna, like, make fun of his

48:24

pants until he, like, doesn't wanna be

48:26

around me anymore. And I'm, like, oh, that might

48:28

happen. Do you and you and your friends are gonna, like,

48:30

run, you're gonna take it You're gonna put picture

48:32

of them up on your podcast and they're and

48:34

I'm like, yeah, these are all. You got

48:36

me. That is a thing. So I'm like But

48:39

Sheila, go

48:41

at like, she's told me she smoked

48:44

pot before. I believe

48:46

she doesn't drink. I'm not saying

48:48

she doesn't at all, but I think she

48:50

doesn't really much because

48:54

I've given her, like, you know, like, Gomartini.

48:56

I was like, oh, that's alcohol. You know, I'm like, we went

48:58

to the steakhouse a couple weeks ago. And I was like and

49:00

she was like, is it and she's like, did it? I could see if

49:02

it's real because it's me. I same I'm

49:04

not a big I hate to taste the alcohol.

49:06

Mhmm. And so I think she doesn't use it a lot.

49:08

I think she probably smokes weed a little bit. She doesn't smoke

49:10

cigarettes. She probably is vaped a bunch.

49:12

And but I've

49:15

even answered about the drug. She told me about drug. She's

49:17

been around and stuff like that. And I'm like, you've never even tried

49:19

it at all. like, I think I believe

49:21

that she believes because she said,

49:23

I tried cocaine ones that

49:25

I will talk with her about it. I'm like, here's why

49:27

you should not do

49:28

that, which I've already done

49:29

on Thursday today. No. The fact no. really should.

49:31

It's not even say. But believe her when she says,

49:33

she goes now. Now, she goes,

49:35

I think, she goes, my friends really

49:37

think, like, if you die from drugs,

49:40

like, how lame Well,

49:42

your time on earth

49:43

is, like, so useless. You

49:45

died from

49:45

that's a great fucking attitude. I believe

49:47

her. Does it make sense? At the same time also

49:49

that she might trimolly one. Do you

49:51

know what I'm saying? I'm I don't I'm not disconnected.

49:54

I don't think you because also, I'll

49:56

say, what are you doing tonight? And show, like,

49:59

this underground party, they're doing the Bronx.

50:01

It's, like, under this bridge, and

50:03

it's, like, DJs and everything. And then what

50:05

to what time? They go to a cops

50:07

come and then everyone kinda

50:08

like, you know,

50:09

they break it up. I'm like, are they arresting people to

50:12

go? No. They just, like, come and make everyone

50:14

kinda break down and leave. Like,

50:16

what time we get out of this kind of whenever that happens? And

50:18

I mean, if that's the latest there

50:20

a bit of, like, four in the morning where she was at,

50:22

and I say, if you're doing that, like, please

50:25

let me know if you need an Uber first to get on if you

50:27

do not get on the subway and let me know

50:29

on your home safe. Like, she'll

50:31

call me and, like, I could tell by her voice. She's not,

50:33

like, fucking whacked out or anything. You know what I mean?

50:35

Like -- Mhmm. -- as she was like, hey, we're home. So and

50:37

so threw up fleet or whatever. And

50:40

We're back

50:40

now. I'm like, he can't answer more than that at

50:42

that

50:43

age. Hell, years old. Yeah. Twenty.

50:45

No. Fuck no. You

50:47

know, to I'd be but I can't

50:49

I'm almost excited, like, because and

50:52

you'll see

50:52

this, I think, with the excitement that we would have.

50:54

Your daughter's

50:55

I don't she's only eight. She's eight years old. So

50:57

it's interesting to see the things that happen

51:02

that seem like you're, like, when you're a dad, you exactly

51:04

are them having sex. And whatever, peer

51:07

settings tattoo. You're like, oh,

51:09

I'm the somehow, like, it's

51:11

just is what do you know what I mean? My daughter's

51:13

got, like, four tattoos, not

51:16

big, but, like, three of them are

51:18

horrible. Like, shitty artwork,

51:20

you guys know, what so tomorrow, I told her go, Isabella.

51:23

Tell me when you when you really wanna get another tattoo

51:25

to a good artist. And let's get you, like, a really

51:28

good idea. If you're gonna do it and get

51:30

you an actual artist, because I go, it's

51:32

insane. These things you have to

51:34

live with forever now on this on

51:36

your dumb skin. But

51:39

like, But he was the first day

51:41

she had to tattoo. You like you get the initial, you're

51:43

like, okay. Here it is that moment. And then

51:46

same thing without her going to you

51:48

know, three years ago, it's in your mind, like,

51:50

she had, like, not

51:52

even a curfew. She was to really go out and do,

51:54

like, friends, like, late night stuff. It wasn't her thing.

51:57

Now she's at an overnight rave

51:59

thing that's happening. And so when it's

52:01

happening, you're just like, the reason it's okay. When

52:03

she when I find out she had sex, if

52:07

she has now, I don't know. And if if whatever

52:09

I find out that she did, whatever it

52:11

was, or she has a boyfriend or I'm not sure,

52:14

something about is that even as drastic

52:16

as it all seems. If

52:18

you know them is what makes it

52:20

not that so much she has tattoos now. I'm like,

52:23

tattoos where I'm

52:24

like, it's still fucking Isabella. It's

52:26

with a dumb tattoo on her

52:27

on her ear now. You know, I mean, like, fuck.

52:30

And the fact that I can and also a

52:32

relationship where where I can go. It's like, stop getting

52:34

shitty tattoos you fucking

52:35

idiot. You know what I mean? Yeah. And she's, like, gonna

52:37

work. So I I think that's, like,

52:39

You guys are getting the you can't can't really ask

52:41

That's what I'm saying. That sounds fucking amazing.

52:43

You kinda

52:44

get, like, you just get over because you're, like, it's a human

52:46

thing. Right? And she's a purse her own person. She's

52:48

eventually gonna fuck a guy. She's eventually gonna

52:51

have a relationship with her. She might

52:53

she might she might fuck a guy that she meets

52:55

one night and that guy is kinda shitty to her and never

52:57

talks to her again and she fuck whatever.

53:00

It is like what it is. Like at the end of day, they're

53:02

you don't love her because of the sum of her mistakes,

53:05

you know. It's very

53:06

it's very well said. Dude,

53:09

see, we got deep. That's why I guess.

53:11

The sum of our mistakes.

53:13

We'll be right back.

53:14

That's one of thefuckers. We're gonna throw

53:16

the commercial right back after these messages.

53:20

Alright. I asked you also. We talked before

53:22

we were recording about not just getting

53:25

deep, but also if you had any embarrassing stories,

53:27

people thought you hate you put up too.

53:29

Yeah. And I would love to fucking go

53:32

out on those. You got

53:34

you got

53:35

seeing Kevin Hart and Sickler audience.

53:38

Yeah. Cicero's audience is pretty funny

53:40

one. Well, actually, I'll go

53:42

sequentially. I'll tell the Kevin Hart one is fighting

53:44

Sacramento. He Chev

53:49

is performing at a couple of years

53:51

ago. And Kevin Hart for the background and started

53:53

to get me and him started together, Mehan

53:55

and Kurt Metsker, Kev. But

53:58

two years, we drove from Philly to New York

54:00

every day, you know, five,

54:02

six days a week. With

54:04

Keith Robinson, and we were just buddies. You

54:06

know, we just hit it off me and Kev. Kev

54:08

kinda went to LA

54:12

sort of quick. went to Montreal pretty quick,

54:14

and then he got stuff in small parts things. He

54:16

was moving and shaking. And

54:20

then I just kinda have the slow steps

54:22

like going. So it where our worlds

54:25

come back and collide several years if you're not seeing

54:27

each other, he's

54:29

headlining the hell he's performing and

54:31

headlining at the Arco arena, which is where the Sacramento

54:33

Kings play. I'm doing eighty

54:35

five shows in six days at

54:38

punchline. And

54:42

I get a hold of Kev or vice versa. I don't remember

54:44

which, but I one of us knew the other

54:46

one was in town

54:47

somehow, probably as soon as me reaching

54:49

out. But he was like, yo, come and hang at the hotel

54:51

for a little

54:52

BigJayDew I was like, alright.

54:55

And I get a cab, and I take the cab

54:57

twenty five minute driver. So to and

55:00

the guy's asking me the cab driver was, like, why are you

55:02

going? If you don't mind me asking, what are you going? Are shaping hotels.

55:04

See, I didn't see that luggage or anything. I go,

55:07

oh, no. And it's a cab driver. So you go, oh, you'll probably

55:09

think this is pretty cool. I go

55:12

Kevin Hart. I'm a comedian. I'm in town doing

55:14

the punch line. Blah blah blah. Kevin

55:16

Hart is a old friend of mine.

55:18

He's in town doing the arena. And he's like, oh, yeah.

55:21

know it. I was Oakerson gonna go

55:23

visit him, say hi, catch up.

55:26

He's like, oh, it's so cool. And then he starts asking

55:28

a ton of questions about me. Doing

55:31

a a watch

55:34

my colleagues. Yes. But me doing the shows, the

55:36

improv and I'm a comedian. It's so cool, and

55:38

that's being super complimentary sort

55:40

of, and then enter some lull

55:43

he goes. He goes, is it possible

55:45

to get tickets at all? And

55:47

I was like, yeah. Sure. I got bunch

55:49

of shows. Just gonna let me know which

55:51

show and where he goes. A bunch of shows

55:54

at the article or reader, I was like, oh, you

55:56

meant for a Kev show? I

55:58

was like, no. No. I don't

56:00

think I can get you tickets for him. Sorry. And

56:03

he's like, oh, man. I had to ask

56:05

you, though, whatever. And I'm like, and

56:07

it was quiet and awkward. And

56:09

when I get out of the cab, he goes, Here's

56:13

a card. Here's it's hard to

56:15

get a cab out here. It's like before Uber was everywhere.

56:17

It's hard to get cab out here. So

56:19

take this. Call me. Give me five minutes, and I'll pick you

56:21

up. Take you back. Okay?

56:24

Then it was awkward, but I'm like who cares, drive

56:27

me home. I go. Jeff says, meet

56:29

me in the hotel gym. The

56:32

hotel gym, I've never seen us besides this hotel.

56:35

The entrance for it is outside. It's

56:37

like through the hotel. It's like the gym

56:39

for the hotel will be a go outside. When

56:42

we leave well, first, I stay

56:44

in there and because I'm not in workout clothes.

56:47

I stand out. He finishes up his workout

56:49

and, you know, lamenting his successes. I'm

56:52

asking him in fairness, but I'm just like, yeah, what

56:54

was it, man? He's like, specials. And

56:57

and, you know, Shaquille and the other some. And

57:01

then we

57:03

we leave the gym and it's

57:06

say about thirty yards from Jim

57:08

Dorr to the front of the hotel, thirty

57:11

yards shuts the city

57:14

off. I mean, like, car stop.

57:16

People out of buildings. People yell at their windows.

57:18

They can't they're so blown away and so

57:20

psyched. Kevin Hart's taking

57:22

his little walk from his gym clothes in

57:24

a towel. Just going in front They

57:27

also, unknowingly, in my mind, I'm going, well,

57:29

they definitely got in security also,

57:31

which sucks. And

57:33

we go in the hotel, go up to his room, and, you know,

57:35

everything you think is, like, a bunch of

57:37

rooms, basically an apartment on top of this beautiful

57:40

hotel. You want a you

57:42

want a lobster? We got lobsters. It's

57:45

a lot. And I'm telling them, also, as I'm

57:47

doing these seven show and in front of us, I go

57:49

that weekend going, like, headlining

57:52

finally. And then they get, you know, it gets smacked

57:54

in the face with it again because I'm, like, again,

57:56

it's a headline weekend. It's all those shows

57:58

for, like, you know, minimum guarantees and stuff.

58:00

Yeah. You know, this isn't, like, HoneyDew, your

58:02

Yeah.

58:03

When you come home from those gigs after buying

58:05

food all weekend stuff, you come home with,

58:07

like, hundreds of dollars. Right. And

58:12

and I'm watching his life. I'm just, like, hitting me and where

58:14

I'm just, like, you really feel like a failure. And

58:17

I'm trying to like,

58:20

find some oh, and he's also

58:22

showing me his he's got as

58:24

a crew there of, like, film crew showing

58:26

him the new intro for a special. It's like there's

58:28

pirro and he's being shot out of the floor.

58:31

And I'm like, you know, in front of a sold out

58:33

arena somewhere. I'm like, I'm

58:35

just trying to look around for some semblance of,

58:37

like, not as because Kev's Kev's personality.

58:40

If I saw him in the wall, I hope I see him at the Super

58:42

Bowl, it'd be great. But

58:46

he's just like, I

58:48

I, you know, I'm trying to find some semblance

58:50

of, like, connection man. What's

58:52

like something that's we can relate to

58:55

anymore still. And as

58:57

boys are all playing Xbox three sixty,

59:00

NBA, and I go up. Still

59:02

breaking the three sixty on the road though. Some things

59:04

don't change. Right? It's maybe the first words I've said in

59:06

fifteen minutes except just scanning for something.

59:08

I go, something's never changed. Right?

59:10

Still bringing the Xbox three Sickler. I go.

59:13

Me too, Diego mine's like hooked up in my

59:15

room right now. Got a

59:17

game on pause, actually. And he goes, oh,

59:19

no. No. No. He's just saying a matter of fact. He's

59:21

not, like, rubbing it in my face, but, you

59:24

know, when you're in that zone, it's, like, you know,

59:26

he's like, oh, yeah. goes

59:28

he goes, no. No. No. We just when we land, we have

59:31

the runner go grab one, and then we just

59:33

leave it for the housekeeping to have

59:35

I was just, like, I have to leave.

59:37

Like, what? I was, like, gotta go I gotta go read

59:39

for my show. It's, like, two PM. Then we gotta go.

59:41

Donate in three sixties every season.

59:44

This Christ. So I so

59:47

I go

59:48

sorry. I

59:51

go I have to leave. I just make some excuses.

59:54

I gotta get out of here. I'd

59:56

call the guy. He comes pick me up when he gets

59:58

in the car and he goes, hey man.

1:00:01

He's like, how was he's like, he's like probing

1:00:03

a bit, and I'm like, it was fine, man.

1:00:05

Like, I know he's like, was it all what's he

1:00:07

like? And I'm like, No. Like, no. I'm like,

1:00:09

it's like a old buddy. So I was like, it's yeah. He was

1:00:11

great. It was good to see. It was good to catch up. Just trying

1:00:13

to get out of the conversation. And

1:00:16

the guy goes, by the way, man, I'm

1:00:18

like, I feel really, like,

1:00:21

stupid for what I asked before.

1:00:23

He goes, if that if

1:00:25

that offer is still on table, I'd love to come

1:00:27

see one of your shows, if that's okay. And I was like,

1:00:30

yeah. You know, I'm I'm most disregarding of

1:00:32

them, but I'm just, like, Sure. You

1:00:34

know, yeah, I'll get him. I'm like,

1:00:36

yeah, man. That's fine. I'll get you tickets, and

1:00:39

he goes in about a five minute thing about, like,

1:00:41

oh, man. It's gonna be so cool, the punch. Line.

1:00:43

I'm gonna bring my girl and be like, yo, I

1:00:45

know the comedian. Like, we we we we even

1:00:47

say, hi, afterward. He's like, selling

1:00:50

a night of, like, this thing. And I'm

1:00:52

like, yeah, dude. Totally. It'll be great.

1:00:54

And then we sit quietly for, like, twenty five

1:00:56

minutes. And I'm the whole twenty five minutes, I'm just

1:00:58

in my head going, like, Maybe

1:01:00

I should've went to college.

1:01:01

Like, I don't know if I'm gonna I fucking

1:01:03

doubt I'm angry. Yeah. I'm like I'm like, there

1:01:06

is, like, such a gap between

1:01:08

our success. You

1:01:10

know what I mean? I'm just, like I'm,

1:01:12

like, I'm, like, at this point, I'm probably in my thirties. You know

1:01:14

what I mean? Like, like, maybe not deep thirties,

1:01:16

but, like, early to mid to

1:01:18

early mid thirties. And I'm, like, I'm

1:01:20

not, like, anywhere, like, near okay,

1:01:23

like, financially at all. I'm

1:01:25

like, it's just weighing on me. And then as I'm getting

1:01:27

ahead of it, he pulls up in front of the hotel,

1:01:30

my stupid shitty hotel.

1:01:32

And I start to step out of the car and he's like, not

1:01:34

saying anything and I go, Matt,

1:01:36

who you wanna give me, like, your info or

1:01:38

take my you know, I'm giving my

1:01:41

number. You want my number

1:01:43

for the thing? This guy was he

1:01:45

went back and he goes, dude, I'll be honest with

1:01:47

I'm probably not gonna come. Had

1:01:50

to go inside and call my mom to not

1:01:52

hang myself from a ceiling fan in that

1:01:54

hotel. One

1:01:57

last

1:01:58

came or not. Yeah. For real, dude.

1:02:00

You're already So the oversell and

1:02:02

the thing goes, oh, man. It's Is it cool? We have a

1:02:04

drink with you after? We buy you a shot afterwards.

1:02:06

It's like, yeah, man. Whatever. I'll

1:02:09

say, how do you and your check? Yeah, dude. Honestly,

1:02:11

I he just didn't want the ride home to be

1:02:12

awkward.

1:02:13

Sure. He

1:02:13

got all goofed up and then he's like, yeah, dude, I actually don't

1:02:15

give a shit by genius.

1:02:19

It is pretty in front. And where that'll

1:02:21

flow into the other figure if you like?

1:02:23

I think you like where it flows into it is Oakerson

1:02:25

it's always my and

1:02:27

Kev is, you know, unfortunately for

1:02:30

me I mean, fortunately for me a friend

1:02:32

and and great dude. But unfortunately,

1:02:34

you know, that's your gauge, the person you're, like, next

1:02:36

to when you start. What are they doing?

1:02:39

And also, Metzger too, when we went

1:02:41

into the mainstream comedy world more,

1:02:44

whatever you wanna call it, you know, the out of

1:02:46

the black circuit. Kirk, because he was

1:02:49

such a great joke writer and so good at that already,

1:02:51

I now have to adjust my hip hop y,

1:02:54

like, pander in comedy and Kurt's likeness.

1:02:57

Kurt's giving us half hour special before me, honestly.

1:02:59

So now I feel like Kurt's zipping me. You

1:03:01

know what I mean? And you think last man out.

1:03:04

And I've always just kind of carried that stowage

1:03:06

and particular things and you'll appreciate

1:03:08

this for sure as sports

1:03:10

fan. I know you are. I

1:03:12

I'm sorry to hear you. You know

1:03:13

I got a bat. Yeah. Yeah.

1:03:16

You're the guy. Oh, I heard about a guy getting a

1:03:18

bat. III

1:03:23

watched Kev

1:03:27

on all these things. One and I'll yell from

1:03:29

the rooftops. And Kevin Hart, I

1:03:31

genuinely love you and I root for you

1:03:33

every day. He's not an Eagles fan.

1:03:36

It's very easy to play Madden with Kirby's giants

1:03:38

fan. Now, that may have just

1:03:40

changed over the years, but if it did change

1:03:42

in over the years, then you're a chick.

1:03:44

Because then that means a boyfriend

1:03:47

made you a fan of his team. Yeah. I

1:03:50

think, honestly, what a prize is, he's a Philly

1:03:52

son. You know what I mean? He's so known that he kinda

1:03:54

like I'm sure he became an Eagles fan when

1:03:56

they gave him probably the key to the city.

1:03:59

And I'm a huge Sickler fan

1:04:01

too. And, like, just there's I mean, after

1:04:03

that niner's Eagles game, the

1:04:06

my daughter loves, by the way, she loves sending

1:04:08

me a good picture of Kev

1:04:10

killing it. Because he's like, don't you know him? Joe's

1:04:12

I was like, don't you know him? Yeah. And it was like

1:04:14

Joel Embiid with Kev

1:04:17

celebrating with the Eagles after the win. And

1:04:19

he was like, goddamn. And

1:04:21

I, when

1:04:23

I started making any kind of money, one of my

1:04:25

first favorite things to do is I'm you know, I

1:04:27

can't it's like when I was a kid where

1:04:29

I can go to fifteen,

1:04:32

sixteen, six years games a year.

1:04:35

Like, if I go to a couple now, so when I go to

1:04:38

the games, I'm like, I'll drop couple

1:04:40

bucks so we can like, no, I wanna I

1:04:42

know the row. I'm like, I wanna sit seventh row

1:04:44

and you

1:04:47

know, behind the this bench so we could

1:04:49

see the offense in a second. Mhmm. I just know

1:04:51

we're gonna pan, they're expensive. And they

1:04:53

vary of price, but they're always expensive.

1:04:56

And through radio gigs

1:04:58

because the in house announcer for the sixers

1:05:02

is the is

1:05:04

a friend of mine because he I've done his radio

1:05:06

show a bunch, and he's great. And

1:05:10

when I started making couple bucks, I remember

1:05:12

saying, I was like, wanna get season

1:05:14

ticket. I'm gonna get ten game thing.

1:05:16

I'll give a couple

1:05:17

away, and I just want but I want to get seasoned I

1:05:19

want those seats that I sit in were, like, comparable.

1:05:23

And I go and I no one can really it's

1:05:25

always things like you have to fill out a

1:05:28

form and join, like, the Sixers

1:05:30

club -- Yeah. -- whatever and then you have to

1:05:32

go on a waiting list and all this stuff and I go, no,

1:05:34

man. Come on. I'm like in entertainment enough.

1:05:37

Enough that I go, I don't

1:05:39

want this for free. You told me that face

1:05:41

value price for these season tickets, I'll pay, but I just

1:05:43

want to get I don't wanna go for those rigmarole. Always

1:05:45

gonna run around and run around people so

1:05:47

they can do something for me. They can't Matt

1:05:50

Cord is the name of the announcement, sir. So just

1:05:52

sweet help sweet guy. I say something to him

1:05:54

at one point. I'm like, now I wanna get some of my good

1:05:57

puts again, say, I gotta join at the corporate whatever

1:05:59

and he goes. He's like, I'm gonna

1:06:01

tell them corporate accounts

1:06:03

that I'm gonna have a guy call you

1:06:06

and get the sorted out for you. I

1:06:09

could tell when like I called me, Matt

1:06:12

Kors, it's a sweet testament. He was, well,

1:06:14

I've never said a word about this. I've just acted

1:06:16

like it never happened. Because Matt

1:06:18

definitely presented to this guy

1:06:21

like this. He goes, hey, call

1:06:24

this guy here. He goes, Big Oakerson

1:06:27

goes, let's get some season tickets.

1:06:29

And I know it's like that where he's going, like,

1:06:32

pretty cool. Right? This guy's definitely

1:06:34

like I don't know the idea that is. So he

1:06:36

calls me because, yeah, Matt said, you were looking to

1:06:38

get a season tickets. I was like, yeah, man. I

1:06:41

really would like to be, like, in this area

1:06:43

and, like, yeah, it would mean the world. I

1:06:45

mean, I'm, like, goosebumps. He's excited

1:06:47

for this, and he goes, So he

1:06:49

goes, you just gotta go online and fill out, like, the

1:06:51

six years club. You just told me this process again.

1:06:53

You know

1:06:53

what you are. And then you go on that waiting list

1:06:56

and it's whatever. And I'm like, oh, that's so

1:06:58

I never asked Matt again. He hasn't asked me about

1:07:00

it. He assumes probably that when he sees me at

1:07:03

my season pass, season tickets. So

1:07:06

Now I start going when I do go to these games

1:07:08

and sit good seats, I

1:07:11

loom at the floor

1:07:14

seats. On the side

1:07:16

of the benches because for some reason that's

1:07:18

the one I just know them now. The old man

1:07:21

who gets in problems every year

1:07:23

by going on the court It says

1:07:25

the sixth man on his thing. He owns all

1:07:27

the dormitories at University of

1:07:29

Pennsylvania. That's why he's there and he's a lunatic

1:07:31

who thinks he's part of the team. But he

1:07:33

pays for it so they put him there. On the other

1:07:35

side of the scores table, and that shyamalan

1:07:38

and whoever he brings and a

1:07:40

couple down as

1:07:42

a lawyer named Tom Klein. I found

1:07:44

this guy's commercials on TV because I'm

1:07:46

like, who? Why does this guy look

1:07:49

disinterested? That. I love it. Disinterested.

1:07:51

And at one hundred percent of the Sixers

1:07:54

games, he must work in the building.

1:07:56

I don't know. It's crazy. And

1:07:58

his and his girlfriend or

1:08:01

wife who is

1:08:04

never not just, like, feet

1:08:06

on the floor of the court, never not on

1:08:08

her phone giving a shit. He

1:08:10

doesn't seem to be appreciating. I don't know what I wanted to do,

1:08:12

but he's just, like, so used to it by now. He doesn't think

1:08:14

it's that big of you. Shamrock, I get,

1:08:16

of course. But you're also just, like, Why

1:08:18

why not say next to show them? And I go

1:08:20

and I have this animated every game I go to, I

1:08:22

just have some moments where I'm like, especially if they

1:08:25

lose, Like, I'm in a fucking hole.

1:08:27

Like, all this money and got to drive back to New York's

1:08:29

sad and now he's fuck. They don't care. They

1:08:32

don't give a shit. When we were down by ten with,

1:08:34

like, two minutes left, they left happily. Like, oh, we're gonna

1:08:36

have to be traffic. So

1:08:39

one game, I go to with Christine,

1:08:42

my girlfriend and we're sitting behind

1:08:45

the Sickler bench, seven

1:08:47

rows. I know that though

1:08:49

row six, I think, five

1:08:52

or six, twelve I always do seven. One of those

1:08:54

two is the first seat that

1:08:56

rises. Oh, okay. I've paid big money

1:08:59

for the third or fourth row

1:09:01

on the floor? If you're not first row

1:09:03

on the

1:09:03

floor, you can't sit everyone's this level.

1:09:06

Oh, is that right? You can't Oh, they're all flat. Right

1:09:08

there. Oh, that is eight which are

1:09:09

two twenty four. Yeah. So I don't So you

1:09:11

get a small

1:09:12

person that sits in front of your fox. It's over.

1:09:14

I I thought people say that because I even talk

1:09:16

because it can't be anybody talk in front of me at all because if

1:09:18

you're watching that,

1:09:20

you know, you're behind the one of the benches. So

1:09:23

you're Sickler, like, three quarter

1:09:25

court. Like, when you have to turn,

1:09:27

like, if there's if there's this tall person, twenty

1:09:30

people down, they're blocking it down, and it

1:09:32

sucks. It's just bad bad seat.

1:09:34

So I know the seats and we're sitting in those,

1:09:37

and I'm doing my stare at

1:09:39

the people I'm like, shout out. I don't get any

1:09:42

love. Usually,

1:09:44

I tell Matt that

1:09:46

I'm coming, that announcer, so I'd come say, hi, let

1:09:48

me go down and watch some shoot around before the game

1:09:50

little bit. And but

1:09:52

I didn't that one we got there kind of late, so I'm like, I'm not

1:09:55

gonna bother him. I'm sitting in our seats.

1:09:57

We don't need anything from him. You know what I mean? So

1:09:59

I go and I'm looking at everybody

1:10:02

pissed, and then saying

1:10:04

to Christine, I go, I had brought

1:10:06

him over it. I'm so over that they are

1:10:08

not, like, why do I get no Philly love?

1:10:10

Like, I spinged them up all the time and there's

1:10:13

murals at Kevin Hart in Philadelphia. And

1:10:16

I'm just giving my bitching, my, you know, silly

1:10:18

bitching on purpose. It'd be funny almost. And

1:10:21

then the water ice sky

1:10:23

comes by. I go, Excuse

1:10:26

me, sir. And this guy behind me,

1:10:28

like, shoves me and I'm like, and

1:10:30

he goes, dude, and

1:10:32

I'm on the screen. No. She's right.

1:10:34

Tommy, because I look at what I I mean, I

1:10:36

do. I go. I guess

1:10:39

and I hear Matt Cord announcing announcing.

1:10:41

He goes he goes Oh, is that him

1:10:43

right there? Is that him? And

1:10:45

I'm like I said,

1:10:48

I guess and then it cuts

1:10:50

to somebody else. Is

1:10:52

that him right there? Is that another

1:10:55

person? Is that it? Is that and then it

1:10:57

pulls out? On this a

1:11:00

guy with a turban, crazy beard.

1:11:02

Oh, there he goes, no.

1:11:04

There he is, everybody. It's tonight. Shickraiser.

1:11:08

Beard of the game. You

1:11:10

thought they were gonna

1:11:11

give you a shout. I was like, I was like, and

1:11:13

that look, I was like, everybody else just

1:11:15

goes like, ah, I was

1:11:17

like, here we go.

1:11:19

Oh, we go. Just talk to kudos that

1:11:21

I I'd like to say

1:11:24

PJ0PC on the bottom of the

1:11:25

screen. And the punch

1:11:27

to that whole thing, you know.

1:11:29

The final punch in the gut. That's why I always love

1:11:32

the layered story of, like, just when

1:11:34

you think you're out of it and over it, here's one more.

1:11:36

So I was, like, Well, you know

1:11:38

what? It's cool. Look, I get

1:11:40

it. was a contestant and shtick beer to

1:11:42

the game, but I think I go Matt saw

1:11:44

me there. So he's like, he

1:11:46

gave me a little bit of extra because they didn't have me on the camera

1:11:48

a little bit longer

1:11:49

there. But I go, that was Matt, like, give me a little

1:11:51

you know, he can't get approved just

1:11:53

shout me out. So he gave me, like, a little, like, part of

1:11:55

that. So after the game, I go,

1:11:58

I go, Matt, Matt, and

1:12:00

he turns around, he goes, Oh, you came to the game

1:12:02

tonight. I was like, you didn't even fucking recognize

1:12:04

that it wasn't even a shout out from

1:12:06

him. It was an absolute. I was

1:12:08

a random chick out of the

1:12:10

game contestant. That's

1:12:13

probably a prerecorded message to him

1:12:15

going. Is that him? Is that

1:12:17

him? My

1:12:19

No.

1:12:19

I don't think so. I think he's just there right

1:12:21

now.

1:12:22

Fuck. God damn it. That was so funny.

1:12:24

No. I think he just doesn't I think I think what he's

1:12:26

doing is he's just looking at a little monitor here and

1:12:28

go, I'm like, well, well, well, you know,

1:12:30

there's a stupid and then he has to go, like, back

1:12:32

over here doing whatever the thing. So he

1:12:34

didn't rise But man,

1:12:37

I wish there was footage, like, archive

1:12:39

of footage of look at they go and the guy goes,

1:12:41

look up there. Is that him or there you go?

1:12:43

Oh my. Oh my mind.

1:12:46

I talked to all