0:25

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Screen Rock

0:27

Podcast. The podcast will be discussed with the

0:29

weirdest and worst content that's been wrote on

0:31

our screens. and indeed our minds. Shout out

0:34

to everyone who subscribes over on Apple, over

0:36

on Spotify, over on YouTube, really does his

0:38

favour on New Subscribe, over on YouTube. Big

0:40

shout out to everybody who pays for this

0:42

podcast, the patrons, obviously the Freemasons on 399

0:44

a month, they're getting an extra episode every

0:47

single week at the moment and then the

0:49

Illuminati, they got a free hat on their

0:51

heads and extra episodes and they would have

0:53

got priority access to tickets to the Rotties

0:55

at the end of this month. Huge shout out

0:57

to Eugene, who does, who does, who does, who

1:00

does, who does, who does, First one of 2025.

1:02

To the ladies who listen.

1:04

Who are indeed some of

1:06

the most gorgeous. In sexy

1:08

ladies. In the UK of

1:11

Ireland. Little preview

1:13

there. I'm here with Jake Farrell.

1:15

That started to get

1:17

a bit. You know like... Alex Turner kind of

1:19

messes with the cadence and the rhythm of the

1:21

music. Yeah, it's like when they do a gig,

1:24

it's like he's so arrogant now that he's kind

1:26

of dislikes their fans and so he tries to

1:28

trip them up while they see them on them.

1:30

That you look good! On the dance floor I

1:32

don't know if you're looking for old

1:34

men so what? Anything to try and

1:36

stop the crowd of people having a

1:39

good time. A hundred pound a ticket

1:41

to go to the fucking Emirates. Yeah.

1:43

Big shout out to all the ladies

1:45

out there. Some of the most gorgeous

1:47

ones. Yeah, I was trying to do

1:49

the geys that we're talking about this

1:51

week. I was trying to do

1:53

that kind of, I'm Irish and

1:55

kind of intense. You know, deliberately

1:57

tripped myself open to talk to come

1:59

across. personable in some

2:01

way, almost vulnerable, in a way where...

2:04

It's a whole new side of you.

2:06

You might let me stage your house

2:08

tonight. We'll get into that. Paul

2:10

Mescal doesn't have to do that

2:12

anymore. He just turns up and

2:14

he points. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

2:16

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, apparently. And

2:18

he runs away from me. Yeah,

2:20

he has denied that, but I

2:22

think it's so funny that I

2:24

would like it to be true.

2:26

He runs away from women. Yeah,

2:29

people. Ladies and gentlemen, firstly, we

2:31

should say we hope you enjoyed

2:33

the Christmas content we've been throwing

2:35

out. We've been putting out a

2:37

lot of shit. Anyone who's listening

2:39

to all of it, big respect

2:41

from the Brue Dog Guide to

2:43

the Todd Revisit to the Christmas

2:45

Special that we released last week,

2:47

if you haven't checked out any

2:49

of that, please do, you will

2:51

massively enjoy it. And we want

2:53

to wish you a happy new year. Yeah, God.

2:55

2025 2025. Will we be into

2:58

the third year. of doing screen

3:00

rock. Jesus. Screen rock side in

3:02

the in the late summer of

3:04

2025. 2023. Yeah. It started in

3:06

the late summer of 2023. It

3:08

rolled through 2024. Beryl through 2024.

3:10

Picking up steam as it went.

3:13

Yeah. Really picking up steam as

3:15

it went through 2024. And now

3:17

away train is about to smash

3:19

into a village. It arrives in

3:21

2025. Fat bloated. Heaving. Bald. Bald.

3:24

Panting. Yeah, yeah, I mean I

3:26

yeah, I always I I December

3:28

for me It's a real month

3:30

of excess and I look we are

3:33

recording this a few days before

3:35

it actually goes out Mm-hmm. I

3:37

don't know if I'll have pulled some kind

3:39

of dry down on myself I may have done

3:41

I may have put myself through that I

3:43

need I need to do something in the

3:45

dog days of December you start that that kind

3:48

of period of abstinence starts to look attractive

3:50

doesn't it start to look hold them the

3:52

main thing oh and I'm at this point of

3:54

recording I don't mind saying I am still

3:56

looking forward to is my glass of water

3:58

yeah you're doing no no hydration Yeah, I've

4:00

never really investigated why, not

4:02

sure why. Yeah, mate. Oh

4:04

God, it starts, but it's

4:07

still waiting for your assessment

4:09

of your heart from the

4:11

NHS as well. Yeah, that's

4:13

fun to chase that up

4:15

when I get off this

4:17

cool. Yeah, mate. Oh, yeah,

4:19

so I'll, yeah, so I'll

4:21

be in a long, yeah,

4:23

I will be gasping for

4:25

the glass of water, but

4:28

yeah, I'll. No, no, we're

4:30

sending you over a picture. We're

4:32

like, oh, mate, how good did that

4:34

feel? The headache has finally stopped. Yeah,

4:36

good month. But yeah, have you

4:38

got, have you got any, what's

4:41

2025 looking like for Jack Farrell?

4:43

What's your dreams and visions? What

4:45

are you saying? I had a,

4:47

I had like a vision there

4:49

of, you know, when Brent's doing

4:51

the club appearances and he's like,

4:53

what's next to you, what's going

4:55

up? So what's your record in 2025? Jay, it's

4:57

more of this probably more of this shit. It

4:59

doesn't really matter to me if people listen

5:02

or not Now I feel a duty of

5:04

care to come here and talk to you

5:06

about someone on the internet every week anyway.

5:08

It doesn't matter to me. If people will

5:11

continue to listen and we continue to lose

5:13

money sending out hats to the people that

5:15

listen. It's fine by me. If they don't,

5:17

they don't. Yeah. Please. We paid for the

5:19

lights now. We paid for the little recorder

5:22

thing. Yes. Yeah. It's all up with me.

5:24

I don't really know what's next to me.

5:26

I obviously got married like a couple of

5:28

years. Maybe, God, I think we'd started the

5:31

podcast before I got married, how pathetic is

5:33

that? So, I don't know, really? I don't

5:35

know, I feel like I feel very fortunate

5:37

in this stage of my life to have,

5:39

to have, like, good creative outlet for stuff

5:41

like this. Yeah. Doing my little bits and

5:43

bobs of stand up. On the tour, which

5:45

will be rumbling into 25. I've got a

5:48

good job of work. Yeah. All my family

5:50

is touchwood, very healthy. Very healthy. So, so

5:52

yeah, just a touchwood, just a touchwood, a

5:54

touchwood, very healthy. I want to buy a

5:56

remote control car. No, I am going to

5:59

do that though. You need to make an

6:01

extra moment for that. I'm going to get

6:03

my job. I'm going to get my job

6:05

or I'm going to get my job or

6:07

I'm going to get my job or a

6:09

remote, globalised labour force for you. Do you

6:11

know how fucking cheap the workers are now?

6:13

No, um, 2025 for me. So I'll be

6:16

doing a bit of touring. at the front

6:18

end of 2025 in February and March. It'll

6:20

be all over the country. Come and see

6:22

both of us for that if you're listening

6:24

to this. Jake's coming for most of it.

6:26

Some big dates on the Birmingham. May, do

6:28

you know what? Salford selling out. Salford we're

6:30

going to. Manchester's selling out. Birmingham's looking

6:33

good. Yeah, it's all looking good. So

6:35

tour in there. I'm not getting married yet,

6:37

that's 2026 for me. A big one

6:39

is, so my missy is going to

6:41

start having periods again and it's a

6:43

big one is going to be not

6:45

getting up the duff this year to

6:48

be honest with you mate. I really

6:50

don't want any kids this year. I

6:52

really don't want any kids this year.

6:54

I was going to say what's your

6:56

new year's resolution, your new year's resolution.

6:58

Condoms. Condoms, yeah, no, it actually is,

7:01

like an onion. Like an onion to

7:03

do-by-by-by-by-by-by-by-by-by-one, yours would be. Yours would be.

7:05

that and it's buyer remote control car

7:07

buy some condoms. I can show you

7:09

mine if you want it's fucking mental.

7:11

I've got to do that I'm literally

7:13

doing that at the moment. Right. Christmas

7:15

stuff. Just before Christmas and I'm yeah

7:17

I'm running around I do have to

7:19

buy condoms I do need to buy

7:21

a remote control car for my kid

7:23

I've got about three or four driving

7:25

offences I need to deny. genuinely between

7:27

parking speed and all that stuff. I've

7:29

got some delay repay I need to

7:31

sort out with the trains, I've got

7:33

some invoices I need to write, someone

7:35

owes me money in Leicester. Yeah, quite a

7:37

lot of stuff that I do need to sort

7:39

out man, but yeah, 2025. It is

7:42

that for me, just don't get

7:44

the message pregnant again. Just try

7:46

not, just hold, hold, hold, don't

7:48

do it brother! Yeah, I mean,

7:50

actually that's something that's going to

7:52

be happening in 2025. Little mango

7:54

the cat, my Bengal, she's going

7:57

to be... She was sent off

7:59

to the... We were stent off to

8:01

get dick down, to get backsharts, and now

8:03

she was ready to produce Mr Love A's

8:05

spawn. Yeah, and it's just like when you

8:08

got two kids, you got very stressful life

8:10

and your wife works nights. What more do

8:12

you want than seven banked out kittens just

8:15

knocking about? And I'm sure, by the way,

8:17

I am sure that they will be sold

8:19

off. in quick time without any incident. There

8:21

will not be any unintended consequences of this

8:24

at all. So yeah, that's a really exciting

8:26

thing to look forward to that going smoothly

8:28

and you just having a normal life. Are

8:30

you part in New Year's? Me and the Mrs are

8:32

going to Yorkshire. Ooh, nice. AirB&B and

8:35

Yorkshire. Lovely. I'll probably cook something that

8:37

requires me to be on my own in

8:39

silence for three hours. Yeah, that's it. That's

8:41

the trick. Increasingly stressful. Maybe not going to

8:44

be onto the table at the table at

8:46

the table at the right time at the

8:48

right time. I'll be annoyed. seven IPAs later

8:50

fall asleep in front of Jewell Soland. Yeah.

8:53

What's that? Where's that car going? Where's she

8:55

driving to this summer? I say is I

8:57

put another dual cap into my vape. Do

8:59

you also where it doesn't even open to

9:02

the third darling? You might as well stay.

9:04

But like I think for the podcast though.

9:06

Yeah. Like we've done shows in London,

9:08

we've got show coming up at the

9:11

end of journey in London, done our

9:13

Christmas special in the Bill Murray. We

9:15

might want to take the podcast on the road, right?

9:17

Are we? Yeah, listen, I've been, I've promised that

9:19

already, don't worry about that. We don't need to

9:21

be, we don't need to be, we don't need

9:23

to be, we don't need to be, we drop

9:25

that hint. No, we're coming on tour this year,

9:27

100%. My stand-up tour finish in March, and I'd

9:29

say after the summer, we're going to all finishing

9:31

March, and I'd say after the summer, after the,

9:33

my stand- my stand-up tour finish in March, I'll finish

9:35

in March, after the summer, and I, after, I'd, I'd,

9:37

I'd, I'd, to all finish in March, I'd, I'd, I'd,

9:40

I'd, I'd, to all finish in March, I'd, I'd, I'd,

9:42

I'd, I'd, I'd, I'd, I'd, I'd, I'd, I'd, I'd, I'd,

9:44

I Yeah, how are we going to get seven kittens

9:46

on the train to Aberdeen? The thing is because we

9:48

because obviously we've posted hats to so many of the

9:50

patrons and we will still be doing that if you

9:52

want to get a rotter's cap make sure you sign

9:54

up 5.99 a month because we're going to sell out

9:57

soon that that lady in China is getting very good

9:59

enough with my demands. But we know where

10:01

lots of you live and we

10:03

do know that there are plenty

10:06

in Glasgow, plenty in Aberdeen, plenty

10:08

in Edinburgh, so I think we'd

10:10

definitely like to come to Scotland.

10:13

Certainly Bristol, certainly Brighton, definitely Manchester.

10:15

Anywhere else, give us a shout.

10:17

We will finish with a big London

10:20

show where I don't want to

10:22

say anything too big. Obviously we've

10:24

got the Rotties coming up at

10:26

Bush Hall, but let's just say the

10:29

Palladium. might be expecting a couple

10:31

of rotids. Let's just say that the

10:33

Palladium might be expecting it. That's on our vision

10:35

board is it for 2025? Yeah. We'll do the

10:37

Palladium, just me and you at the Palladium. Yeah,

10:40

no one will come, but we'll go. Yeah, no,

10:42

look, I think 2025, as you say, more is

10:44

the same, and in terms of the podcast, like...

10:46

In 2024 this did building some of it being

10:48

a lot bigger than it was the year prior.

10:50

A lot bigger than it had any right or

10:53

need to be. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I think

10:55

this year we want to keep growing it. We

10:57

want to do more of the live shows. We

10:59

really enjoy the live shows. If you haven't watched

11:01

the Christmas special that recorded at the start of December,

11:03

watch it on our YouTube and I would recommend watching it

11:05

because it was mental. It was really good fun. with the

11:07

live shows we almost try and turn them into little plays

11:09

don't we always try and set up a little story no

11:11

no it's quite different like this no it's quite different to

11:14

the episodes isn't it well we do talk about content creators

11:16

and we do a bit of chat but we also try

11:18

and set up like a thing of I've got to get

11:20

Jacob present or there's no special guess it's almost like a

11:22

little theater shows so we look forward to do more that

11:24

if there's anyone you want us to cover sign up on

11:26

a patron and you know three quid and just send us

11:28

a message being like you just send us a message being

11:30

like you talk about this a message being like you

11:32

talk about this talk about this talk about this talk

11:34

about this and we always talk about this and we

11:36

always do And I think the other thing we need

11:38

to start getting some more guests on. We're getting

11:40

ladies on. I want to get some ladies. I

11:42

think, I mean we should talk about that. I

11:44

know what you're going to be like,

11:47

you're going to be like, yeah we're

11:49

talking about that off-mike. Yeah. Whenever you

11:51

say that, that means we shouldn't be

11:53

talking about female content creators. We had

11:55

the idea that we were like, because

11:58

we don't know what we're fucking doing. get

12:00

this far? We were like we shouldn't talk

12:02

about female content creators because we always want

12:04

to make sure we're not punching down we're

12:07

punching up and it's difficult sometimes I think

12:09

we have got it wrong in the past

12:11

I don't mind saying um but we was

12:13

like ah two sad little men taking a

12:16

piss out of a girl Is that good?

12:18

Is that bad? And we have had a

12:20

journalist who freestar reviewed us on Apple. She

12:22

didn't write anything, but it was like, I'd

12:25

love to know why they don't talk about

12:27

women. It's like, well, you did DM me

12:29

and I did tell you and you've written

12:32

that review anyway. But I think we should.

12:34

Look, the Todd revisit we did the other

12:36

day. We took the piss. But we were...

12:38

We're all so nice, we're ultimately celebrating. Yes,

12:41

for sure. And I don't want anyone to

12:43

read into this as some kind of inverse

12:45

sexism where it's like, oh, women can't take

12:47

it, or like women don't like banter. It's

12:50

like, that's not, it just feels like there's

12:52

not really that many good subjects. Also, by

12:54

the way, 90% of the worst people on

12:57

the internet are men. Would you believe? Look,

12:59

we're trying. We're trying. Spicy content creators that

13:01

we've spoken a little bit about that I

13:03

think would be fair game for the pod

13:06

Lily Phillips we should do because there's a

13:08

there's a documentary out About the day where

13:10

she's like with a hundred men. Yeah, and

13:12

I she's currently casting for a thousand men

13:15

as well Yeah, I mean that that's Yeah,

13:17

people have started using Lily Phillips away as

13:19

a meme I know, well I'm, listen, I'm

13:21

hopeful, I hope we get credit for that.

13:24

Oxford, English dictionary, Word of the Year, 2025,

13:26

Lily Flips Away, originally coined by the Screen

13:28

Rock Podcast. Who then turned the gun on

13:31

themselves in a recent raid of their studio

13:33

in No, upshotway, North London. Anybody else do

13:35

we need to sell yet? No, just wishing

13:37

everyone a happy new year. I think like,

13:40

we obviously take the piss, we're very grateful

13:42

that anyone might listen to this. It was

13:44

really heartening to see people to see people

13:46

to see people talk about. like being in

13:49

the top five or top ten or whatever

13:51

of their Spotify rap, that's cool. The idea

13:53

that people look forward to the episodes every

13:56

week is more than we can have ever

13:58

asked for. Hope you have a great new

14:00

year, happy new year. I hope you enjoy

14:02

this week's episode. This guy is a real

14:05

piece of work. Yeah, this is what it's

14:07

all about. This is pure screen rot. This

14:09

is uncut rock. I keep nearly saying he's

14:11

a UK creator. Don't say that! Yeah, this

14:14

is what it's all about. Tiktokers who deserve

14:16

a fucking kicking. This week we are talking

14:18

about the weird Irish bloke that kind of

14:21

looks like an elf and is into books

14:23

and does odd affirmation videos. We're talking about

14:25

one million followers to his name. Stuart Mackey.

14:35

Oye. Get on this. This is

14:37

a real like, you know what?

14:39

Yeah, limber up. Let's go. This

14:41

is this is what we train

14:44

for. This is what you and

14:46

I This is what this is

14:48

what come on. This is like

14:50

yeah, look we've had a good

14:53

camp We've been in camp. It's

14:55

been a great camp. We've really

14:57

been working hard. He looks very

14:59

powerful and it's not a normal

15:02

fight. It is not a normal

15:04

fight with this guy and we're

15:06

gonna tell on Saturday night. Trust

15:08

me on that this you and

15:11

I right now. We're like you

15:13

and I right now. We're like

15:15

you and I right now. Do

15:21

you know why? Do you know

15:23

where that came from? Yeah, that

15:25

came from apparently because, uh, Vieira

15:27

was having to go to Neville.

15:30

He's picking on Neville in this.

15:32

Yeah, and Keith, and I, fuck

15:34

it, I love that. Right. Just

15:37

the idea that like, don't you

15:39

pick on my little fucking mate?

15:41

I pick on that cod, not

15:43

you. He was a little con,

15:46

they, all the invincibles did pick

15:48

on him, because he was a

15:50

little cun. He picked on Reyes,

15:53

God rest his soul. God rest

15:55

his soul. Right, let's get back

15:57

on track. Anyway, this is what

15:59

we train for. If we say

16:02

that, we're like, yeah, we're ready

16:04

for this. We are ready. We're

16:06

going to two foot, the Irish

16:09

front. So, and time the array

16:11

has died. in 2014 and here's

16:13

my favorite memory of play. I

16:15

think you played most of the

16:18

verdicts, we got really before it's

16:20

time. Thank you a professor for

16:22

everything you've done for us. So

16:24

get on this, Stuart Mackey, you're

16:27

okay? We're ready. Stuart Mackey. I

16:29

need water so much. Stuart. Time

16:31

for another sip of rain energy

16:34

drink. You're good? Why did that?

16:36

What? Why did it? Come on,

16:38

we need to get on this.

16:40

I'm not well. Sorry. Stuart Mackey

16:43

is evidence for why actors should

16:45

not be allowed to use the

16:47

internet. Yes. This guy, if you

16:50

don't know, is an Irish actor.

16:52

That's... His self proclamation by the

16:54

way on his website. Yeah, yeah,

16:56

yeah, who you may know from

16:59

the videos he makes Yeah, so

17:01

this guy's a well-known actor well

17:03

well known for acting no Yeah,

17:05

it was really like a kind

17:08

of, like say, kind of fake

17:10

it to you, make it scenario.

17:12

What do you do? I'm an

17:15

actor. What have you been in?

17:17

Have you seen My Tic-Toc? Yeah,

17:19

yeah, yeah. When are you acting

17:21

by the way? When are I

17:24

acting? We're all acting brother. Yeah,

17:26

well, yeah, exactly. Welcome to Modern

17:28

Life. Stuart Mackey's got a million

17:31

followers on Instagram. and really, which

17:33

is like a huge, like as

17:35

someone that has, I've got like

17:37

a tiny, literally tiny number of

17:40

follows on Instagram and they painstakingly

17:42

accrued through months of diligent posting

17:44

content. The idea that you can

17:47

have a million follows for doing

17:49

what this guy does is fucking

17:51

insane. Anyway, he's an Irish guy,

17:53

he's an actor, and what's very

17:56

odd about his output is, it's

17:58

a completely mad like hodgepodge of

18:00

insanity. Go on. Well, we've talked

18:02

before about how the algorithm basically

18:05

creates someone's output in a way.

18:07

Like it kind of dictates what

18:09

they do, because it's like, it's

18:12

like with a W.W.E. Star, drink

18:14

if you play the Scream, Rock,

18:16

drinking game, Jake, comparing TikTok to

18:18

a W.W.E. I'll mention pornography in

18:21

a minute. Yeah. The

18:25

little old ears with their cat

18:27

traces. The little old ladies. They

18:29

used to be a producer. Now

18:31

the producer is the audience. That's

18:33

right Sandra, the producers, the audience.

18:35

That's right Sandra, the producers, the

18:37

audience. We're going to say cocky

18:39

in the start, we're like, yeah,

18:41

we're ready, we're fit, we can't

18:43

fucking finish a sentence about him.

18:46

We can record it for a

18:48

day, always goes west. Okay, so

18:50

this guy, he's been shaped by

18:52

the algorithm, where he's an actor,

18:54

and he does these very short,

18:56

highly produced videos of him kind

18:58

of saying... Affirmational, sometimes feminist stuff,

19:00

as that kind of in common

19:02

with Tim Coles, the Emotions in

19:04

Life guy. Yes. There's also sketches

19:06

thrown in there, which are, as

19:08

all comedy made by actors, absolute

19:10

shit. And there is also, I

19:12

felt like the other day, you

19:14

know, the comic, Milton Jones, the

19:16

one-liner comic. He was an actor

19:19

first, apparently. Couldn't get any jobs,

19:21

then he went into comedy. Massive

19:23

Christian as well. Is he? Like

19:25

huge Christian. Yeah. Layersers to Milton

19:27

Jones. Anyway. tour like two he's

19:29

got like a proper tour. Oh

19:31

right right yeah yeah it makes

19:33

like a lot less money than

19:35

he could because he's got the

19:37

tour bus. What do you mean?

19:39

He like rents it or he's

19:41

bought one for himself. It's bought

19:43

it, it would park it outside

19:45

of his house. You could do.

19:47

It's like a proper, you know

19:49

how bands have a tour bus?

19:51

Yeah, it's like you need it

19:54

because they've got all the gear

19:56

to like it. He's just... Is

19:58

it? It's tour support? It's Tom

20:00

Howlton. You know him? He was

20:02

in the news next door. Yes,

20:04

he's a comedian who lived in

20:06

the Tower of London. Yeah. I

20:08

never mentioned it. We'll talk about

20:10

the bloke in a minute. Go

20:12

on. But yeah, Mill and Joe.

20:14

And Tom isn't on it. Tom

20:16

gets the train to the tour

20:18

shows. Millen just gets on the

20:20

bus with the bus driver. How

20:22

mad is that? When we do

20:24

ours, we're going to be like...

20:27

Oh, that's so mad. I'm actually

20:29

now like, I'm like, I think

20:31

I've made that up. Yeah, I

20:33

think I have actually. That's incredible.

20:35

I think we've misunderstood that. It

20:37

might be real. Apparently Fleetwood Mac,

20:39

when they became really, like really,

20:41

like really successful, when they became

20:43

like really successful, they hated the

20:45

other. No, they did. Yeah, I

20:47

think Fleetwood Mac is kind of

20:49

there on record. It was cocaine

20:51

was the issue there. Yeah, oh

20:53

yeah. But they were couples, they

20:55

hated each other, then they were,

20:57

anyway, I think that will have

21:00

probably, that's probably where Screen Right

21:02

is going. We get off Aberdeen

21:04

train station, two limos waiting to

21:06

drive us four minutes to the

21:08

venue. With five grand in debt

21:10

for every show we do. Anyway,

21:12

Stuart Mackey, he's putting out loads

21:14

of mad shit. He's an actor,

21:16

first and foremost, and I think

21:18

he's, and I think he's really

21:20

that like... This is so of

21:22

its time in that he could

21:24

never have become famous, there would

21:26

have been no root for him

21:28

ever to become famous before, but

21:30

now he feels a very specific

21:32

niche on the internet, which I

21:35

think is, he's really interested in

21:37

books, kind of fantasy literature, he's

21:39

a good-looking guy, women like him,

21:41

he says vaguely feminist stuff. Right,

21:43

right. So you're, yeah. I think

21:45

what he's done, and I think

21:47

there's a few men who we

21:49

have spoken about previously on this

21:51

podcast, where... He definitely targets women

21:53

and he definitely wants to appeal

21:55

to women specifically. Targets is a

21:57

funny word. Well, yeah, well, well,

21:59

yeah. But it's a specific kind

22:01

of woman. Right. Do you know

22:03

what I mean? Yes, so the

22:05

kind of allusions to fantasy literature

22:08

and bookishness is invoking a very

22:10

specific woman. With Daniel U.N. Henderson,

22:12

we said that he was mainly

22:14

trying to ensnare... Pennsylvania widows. Well,

22:16

I mean, when you said he's

22:18

got a million followers, I was

22:20

like, I would fucking love to

22:22

see what they look like. Like,

22:24

I mean, right. Thick rim glasses,

22:26

bob hair cuts, all of them

22:28

studying Tolkien, Oxford. Girls who were

22:30

quiet at school. Now let me

22:32

tell you, that is a profitable

22:34

market, my friend. Right. Because here's

22:36

the thing. Yeah. I'm interested to

22:38

hear the thing. Yeah, I'm interested

22:40

to think it through before I

22:43

say it, actually. Here's a thing.

22:45

I could do the Jacob translation

22:47

afterwards. If you, yeah, that's, that's,

22:49

that's kind of... Is the non-problematic

22:51

thing that Jacob means? What used

22:53

to happen is I would look

22:55

to the ceiling, go, do I

22:57

want to talk about this? I

22:59

don't even do that anymore, I

23:01

just, I just say whatever I

23:03

think. He'll translate it for me,

23:05

no problems. I can't believe you'd

23:07

even suggest that. What he was

23:09

saying is he's merely interested in

23:11

investigating the possibility of taking crack.

23:13

The thing is, yeah. It's a

23:16

profitable market place because. All girls.

23:18

All girls. All girls. A great

23:20

way of starting a sentence. Go

23:22

on. All women. Women. Want to

23:24

be appealed to at some point.

23:26

Everyone wants to be, everyone wants

23:28

to feel like someone fancies them

23:30

and someone is trying to flow.

23:32

Desired. They want to be desired.

23:34

The thing is, girls who would

23:36

sort of read books at school

23:38

and do that kind of thing.

23:40

I don't think they were getting

23:42

chased as much at school because

23:44

young lads like they were pretty

23:46

dumb. At least when we were

23:48

at school. I think the end.

23:51

The lay in the land might

23:53

have changed. I don't know what

23:55

they did nowadays. Little fucking. Anyway,

23:57

careful. But yeah, when I was

23:59

at school, right? By the way,

24:01

all girls probably did read at

24:03

school, but some for some girls

24:05

it wasn't part of their identity.

24:07

Yeah, and also, like, I think

24:09

he's specifically going for girls who

24:11

may be a bit quieter at

24:13

school, whereas I would go after,

24:15

I don't mind saying, tarts, right?

24:17

Markam I meant to translate that.

24:19

Not tarts, sorry. What my client

24:21

is suggesting is that he was

24:24

interested physically in women who were

24:26

very open to new sexual possibilities.

24:28

Right around, they'd be, like the

24:30

female equivalent of me, the ones

24:32

who would shout a lot. Yeah?

24:34

As you try to turn down

24:36

the microphone, because I'd be so

24:38

fucking like... Dollybirds! How's it to

24:40

Dollybirds? That's what it is. But

24:42

the thing is, and like, you

24:44

know, when you're at school, you'd

24:46

go right, these girls are the

24:48

ones who are very chatty, they're

24:50

in the dance clubs and they'll

24:52

be at the fucking disco at

24:54

the weekend. Just they're interested in

24:56

this kind of thing. It's just

24:59

they're a bit quieter and they're

25:01

reading books at the moment. They

25:03

get to university. Suddenly, I'm gone.

25:05

Right. I didn't go at the

25:07

same university as those cows. You're

25:09

at Middlesex. You're at Middlesex dousing

25:11

your cock and bollocks in hot

25:13

sauce. Yeah. Right. And I don't

25:15

know about you. Like, you know,

25:17

I think for our generation, you

25:19

kind of, you would keep up

25:21

with everyone you went to school

25:23

with via Facebook. Yeah. And the

25:25

amount of times, me and my

25:27

lads I went to school with,

25:29

would go, hey, you know, that

25:32

girl who was like, yeah, quite

25:34

quiet at school, like, oh love,

25:36

like, if you've seen what she's

25:38

from her, yeah, not too, geez,

25:40

I think that's a real, like,

25:42

like, underdocumented thing. blossom people blossom

25:44

but i think i think it's

25:46

kind of girls who are bookish

25:48

at school blossom later on and

25:50

then some of them don't have

25:52

that mad university face that they

25:54

continue you know going into the

25:56

20s feed I think that in

25:58

the... I'm trying to throw the

26:00

ring! I think that... in secondary

26:02

school the way when we were

26:04

at secondary school late secondary schools

26:07

when you're kind of 1617 18.

26:09

Oftentimes the romantic currency in that

26:11

environment is for extra version and

26:13

is for kind of you are

26:15

you appeal to people by being

26:17

loud and brash both boys and

26:19

girls at least in the southeast

26:21

of England when we were growing

26:23

up. And oftentimes there are a

26:25

group of men and women in

26:27

that situation. We've defined them as

26:29

bookish but you might just say

26:31

more introverted. that don't have a

26:33

place within that sexual or romantic

26:35

marketplace. They then go to university,

26:37

hello, they've all been chucked together.

26:40

And what do they like, sucking,

26:42

fucking and sniffing? That's what they

26:44

like. And they've got all the

26:46

time to do it in the

26:48

world. This is why you pay

26:50

him the good money. This is

26:52

why I get half of 90

26:54

pounds a month. 45 pounds a

26:56

month, and I'm only working 100

26:58

hours a month to get it.

27:00

extraversion and introversion fantastic use of

27:02

terminology and and this guy is

27:04

targeting introverts 40 minutes in shall

27:06

we watch a clip brother so

27:08

this guy he he's not explicitly

27:10

appealing to women in this one

27:12

but this gives you a sense

27:15

well he's bisexual that that's another

27:17

thing we should say well he's

27:19

his bisexual as he's bisexual as

27:21

well I bet it's fucking I

27:23

bet it's introverted gaze that he

27:25

wants common among the kids at

27:27

the moment to the moment to

27:29

yeah how does he he's I

27:31

think he's in the mid-20s so

27:33

this is Stuart Mackey and this

27:35

is the kind of vibe that

27:37

he's into. Not demure! I am

27:39

depressed! I am not mindful! I

27:41

am mentally unstable! I am not

27:43

cute! I am crippled with anxiety!

27:45

So that's kind of like, that

27:48

would be relatable to introverted teens

27:50

and early 20s people wouldn't it?

27:52

Who feel out a place in

27:54

the world, feel like they're struggling

27:56

a bit, feel like they don't

27:58

fit in. Feel the need to

28:00

shout because no one's listening. Yes,

28:02

and he's giving voice to that.

28:04

He happens to be giving voice

28:06

to it on what looks like

28:08

a bridal path in County Cork.

28:10

Let me tell you now, that

28:12

is what island looks like. It's

28:14

so fucked. Island. Yeah, rural island.

28:16

Do you know where he is?

28:18

Do you know where he is?

28:20

Do you know exactly where he

28:23

lives? I don't know. I can

28:25

try and find out. I mean,

28:27

look, I will say by the

28:29

way, we've spoken about Irish content

28:31

creator in the past, we spoke

28:33

about Norsdi, who's a kind of...

28:35

Very Dublin. He's Dublin and he's

28:37

a food content creator and we've

28:39

had a lot of people sort

28:41

of speak to us after that

28:43

episode and go. Love the podcast

28:45

lads, but you were incredibly harsh

28:47

on islands now. We'll say a

28:49

couple of things first of all

28:51

Jake your mum's Irish My dad's

28:53

family is Irish. My mom is

28:56

Irish and my girlfriend, well fiancé

28:58

is Irish, my children or Irish,

29:00

I will be getting an Irish

29:02

passport and citizenship as soon as

29:04

I can. I'd like to think,

29:06

despite our accidents, we are Irish

29:08

enough to critique the Irish, I

29:10

spend a lot of time. I'll

29:12

go with it. In Ireland, and

29:14

I will also say, anything I

29:16

say critical of Ireland, I would

29:18

be much more critical of Britain.

29:20

I think this country in many

29:22

ways is much worse than Ireland.

29:24

I will also say... I think

29:26

Ireland's a second world country in

29:28

many ways. It's funny, I think

29:31

because it's kind of like wet

29:33

and green and beautiful, you know,

29:35

you look at where he was

29:37

stood in that image and you

29:39

go, oh, Ireland, the trees, the

29:41

forest. It's wasteland. It's wasteland. It's

29:43

wasteland. It's wasteland. It's farmland, isn't

29:45

it? It's farmland, isn't it? It's

29:47

farmland, it stinks. I tell you

29:49

that, the soilage. Is that what

29:51

they call it? The soilage. Oh

29:53

yeah, you can definitely critique island.

29:55

You know about the soilage. What

29:57

are you advocating? Just chuck up

29:59

flats on all of that. Flats.

30:01

Yeah, I can smell that real.

30:04

I can smell that real. Honestly,

30:06

the fucking smell. What do you

30:08

want? You just want flats as

30:10

far as the I can see?

30:12

Flats. A road would be nice. I'll

30:14

say that. Fucking hell. Where he is,

30:16

looks exactly like where my partner's family

30:19

lives in Mayo. Currently, Mayo, right?

30:21

Her dad doesn't have a road. What do

30:23

you mean? There isn't a proper

30:25

road that a car can drive

30:27

on to get to his house.

30:29

He's kind of dug out two

30:32

little paths that wheels can just

30:34

about get on. Right. And he

30:36

has to maintain that himself. He

30:38

lives in a field. I'm telling

30:40

you, he lives in a field.

30:42

I'm listening, bro. Like all of

30:44

her other family living fields. Right.

30:46

It's crazy. You just talking about

30:48

rural life? No, no, no,

30:50

no, no, no, no. Okay,

30:52

yeah, I'm sure parts of

30:54

Britain are similar. Like, and

30:57

I've obviously got quite a

30:59

skewed experience, because I've, my,

31:01

my. It's colored by how

31:03

you feel when you go

31:05

and visit these people, though,

31:07

as well, as it's. Please,

31:09

brother, please, please, please, please.

31:11

Yeah, that's clear. You've

31:13

made yourself very clear

31:16

on that. We'll

31:18

get back to Mackey. Before I

31:20

get myself in trouble. I love

31:23

Ireland by the way, and I love

31:25

Irish people so much, but there are

31:27

parts of the real line where I'm

31:29

like... You want more roads? You want

31:31

more roads? What? You want a branch

31:34

of games? Yeah. Just like, you know,

31:36

do up YouTube. Do up your, do up

31:38

your suit, put on your tie and,

31:40

and, and, and, and sing your national

31:42

idea. Yeah, crucially, easy. No, but, but,

31:44

but, just, sorry, have you tested this

31:46

theory out, I know your friends with

31:49

the Irish comedian Mike Gries, who's from

31:51

a rural part of Ireland. Have you

31:53

tested this theory out with him? He kind

31:55

of agrees, yeah, he's like, yeah, he's

31:57

a proud Irishman, who lives in London.

32:00

who has chosen to live elsewhere for

32:03

economic reasons. Yeah, yeah. I'm not, I'm

32:05

not, I'm not trying to get Mike

32:07

in trouble with his brother in. I'm

32:10

just wondering like, my, my grandparents were

32:12

from Dublin and lived here longer than

32:14

they did in Ireland in the end.

32:16

So, and like, I used to go

32:19

back on with the younger to visit

32:21

family. I haven't been back in quite,

32:23

quite, quite some time. So I have

32:26

no real insight into A. Ireland or

32:28

B how Irish people feel about Ireland.

32:30

I do know that my mate of

32:33

mine used to live in Dublin, he

32:35

worked for Paddy Power, he lived there

32:37

for two or three years. And the

32:39

state of the housing market over there

32:42

is terrifying. And it does sound a

32:44

bit, Dublin specifically, sounds a bit like

32:46

a failed state. It's kind of like,

32:49

fuck, to be honest, like it's fucking

32:51

brilliant. Like I was lucky enough to

32:53

perform in Dublin, some have just gone

32:56

with Mike and Victoria at the Ivy

32:58

Gardens, Paddy Power Comedy Festival. Right. And

33:00

like, you know, I'd put around and

33:02

go and get food and go and

33:05

get a drink, and you know, not

33:07

just kind of getting dragged around Temple

33:09

Bar like you would like that, people

33:12

like actually, the good things. Like, oh,

33:14

this is class. Like, it's really, really,

33:16

really good. And I love, like, all

33:19

the people that we hung out with,

33:21

all the Irish comics. Like, like, like,

33:23

all the Irish comics, like, like, like,

33:25

they're really good really nice people and

33:28

I also as well like I I

33:30

I don't do the gigs quite as

33:32

often anymore but I would I regularly

33:35

perform in Belfast as well and it's

33:37

again brilliant lovely place lovely city really

33:39

cool but I do yeah I think

33:42

politically there's liberties have been taken and

33:44

it's struggling and and and and that

33:46

shows up in the sticks a bit

33:48

when there's no roads. Showing up in

33:51

the sticks a bit and I tell

33:53

you what. I have a feeling he's

33:55

not doubling, I have a feeling he's

33:58

the sticks. Yeah, someone's probably shouting, like

34:00

it's so obvious what type of island

34:02

his accent is, I can tell you

34:05

the difference between Irish people can do

34:07

a cork accent versus a dairy actor.

34:09

Chris Kent is cork, he's not cork.

34:11

but he's yeah he might be I

34:14

have a feeling he's West Coast actually

34:16

like my girlfriend anyway this is rural

34:18

this is rural shit and he's playing

34:21

on that stew Mackey he's gonna got

34:23

a bit of a lumber Jackie vibe

34:25

to him he's got they do they

34:28

in general this is a bit woodsman

34:30

woodsman you get this kind of acts

34:32

yeah there's kind of almost like yeah

34:34

Yeah, I mean he is one of

34:37

the most Irish looking people I've ever

34:39

seen in my life between his complexion,

34:41

between his eye colour, he's fair, his

34:44

eye colour, he's fair, pretty, yeah, pretty

34:46

fellow. He has an androgynous vibe to

34:48

him, which plays in, he's like an

34:50

openly bisexual, like you say, he has

34:53

that vibe to him. And I'm not

34:55

bisexual, no. But I'm having a look

34:57

and I'm going, what? It's a prime

35:00

rib, sexy girl. in that first one

35:02

he was playing on the idea of

35:04

being like I'm not demure I'm not

35:07

mindful I'm depressed and I'm anxious yeah

35:09

but but then he does the thing

35:11

at the end we goes I'm kind

35:13

of cute yeah so he's kind of

35:16

that that is sickening I'm sorry that

35:18

is you know I've seen it about

35:20

like can I be cute for a

35:23

minute like oh no no And he

35:25

seems more earnest than Daniel you and

35:27

Henderson, but he is just as cringy

35:30

I think But but at least Daniel

35:32

you and Henderson that there was a

35:34

kind of like he was like the

35:36

kind of perfect bond villain creep. Yes,

35:39

litties. You've been watching your jiggly bits

35:41

for too long now, and I just

35:43

need to wussle my tongue between your

35:46

thighs and your foot. It's like I

35:48

felt like Daniel you and Henderson was

35:50

targeting nutters. You know what I mean?

35:53

Like how long then? I'm writing to

35:55

you from the coldest part of Pennsylvania.

35:57

I'm at my local library using their

35:59

computer. to email you to say I

36:02

want to send you my savings. I

36:04

feel like he says in the video

36:06

but I think he's going after I

36:09

think Mackey is going after women who

36:11

are depressed. Yeah women and men by

36:13

the looks of things who are depressed

36:16

and and this is in that first

36:18

one he's kind of acknowledging the pain

36:20

and difficulty of the world yes in

36:22

the second one he's giving the pain

36:25

and difficulty of the world. You know

36:27

at one point you did believe in

36:29

Santa, so why it's just so hard

36:32

to believe in yourself. Boom, got you

36:34

with that one? When I believed in

36:36

Santa, I was fucking six, you idiot.

36:39

That's why, I'm 33 now, I'm struggling

36:41

to hold down my job, struggling to

36:43

pay the mortgage, struggling to pay the

36:45

car every month, and I'm fucking just

36:48

barely holding it together. I'm not a

36:50

fucking six-year-old that believes a bloke flies

36:52

around with a load of reinders giving

36:55

out presents. I don't know what, December.

36:57

I'm broke. I mean, I think we

36:59

can probably watch the next one as

37:02

well, because it's kind of like too

37:04

far here, where it's their very similar

37:06

ones. This is another very short video,

37:08

um, with a little positive affirmation, filmed

37:11

in the same way. He's kind of

37:13

stood on a country lane, beautiful leaves

37:15

behind him, and he's giving you a

37:18

little message. Just a thought, like, mad,

37:20

isn't it? This guy's got a million

37:22

followers like this isn't some niche freak

37:25

corner of the end like we've had

37:27

to pop at some people that didn't

37:29

deserve it We had to go a

37:31

bloke from New York that does cat

37:34

noises it's got about as many followers

37:36

as we have Frosty air Frost and

37:38

Leo had his moment in the sun.

37:41

It was a bit much if you

37:43

follow him still and follow him now

37:45

because he will not stop talking about

37:47

how much he wants in his words

37:50

uncuts. Yeah, don't mean to invest him.

37:52

Do you know what this makes me

37:54

think about? The creeps,

37:57

the sort of... The guys who target

37:59

women in a way that I find

38:01

creepy, that we've discussed in the past,

38:03

Tim Coles and Daniel you and Hensson.

38:05

When I look at their following, which

38:07

I think is both of theirs is

38:09

less than this guy. Daniel you and

38:11

Henson definitely is, but I think Coles

38:13

is like half a million, yeah, so

38:15

it's still loads, but this guy's serious,

38:17

this guy's alien, this guy's alien, alien,

38:19

yeah. But with both Daniel and Henson

38:21

and Henson and Coles, I felt a

38:23

real confidence, I felt a real confidence,

38:25

I was like all of those numbers,

38:28

are people hate, are people hate, a

38:30

people hate watching. Right, right? I like,

38:32

yeah, it is. I agree with that,

38:34

I agree with that. It's like, you

38:36

know, the traction that gets built with

38:38

these... There's a lot of anger, it's

38:40

just like, it's just like, look at

38:42

the fucking state, there is what is

38:44

going on. Right, right. Whereas like, I

38:46

think the real frightening thing with this

38:48

is like, I think it's working. Oh

38:50

yeah, this guy is popular. Do you

38:52

know what I mean? This guy is

38:54

like a unicorn. I think girls are

38:56

watching this and going, oh, I think

38:58

that's mad. He's, he, so that when

39:00

a company gets a $1 billion valuation,

39:03

they call the company a unicorn. And

39:05

he's like that, but for TikTok accounts,

39:07

where it's like, he can actually generate,

39:09

like he's a one-off, he looks insane,

39:11

he's like kind of, like waist length

39:13

hair, and he looks a bit like

39:15

an elf, quite a lot as well.

39:17

and he's doing this kind of very

39:19

cringy very earnest like oh aren't I

39:21

cute aren't they silly I'm just saying

39:23

like you know we could be in

39:25

matchings by Christmas yeah appealing to this

39:27

thing and at once he's at once

39:29

exhibiting a like he's like sexually powerful

39:31

right he's desirable in and of himself

39:33

but he's pretending that he's like fucked

39:35

up and weird just like you yeah

39:38

I'm a bit crazy is it bad

39:40

if I'm a bit quiet and awkward

39:42

whilst you've got a million followers yeah

39:44

shit off yeah do you know like

39:46

it like this is a thing like

39:48

he I think most of his intentions

39:50

if not his intentions certainly his subject

39:52

matter is romantic yes there's an appeal

39:54

an over appeal to romance yeah yeah

39:56

old Now I think and it's a

39:58

hard lesson you learn in life that

40:00

all the things that make you cringe

40:02

about romance also work. Yes. Do you

40:04

know what I mean by the missus

40:06

some flowers? It works. Being nice to

40:08

her. It works? It works. Yeah. Yeah.

40:10

Listing. Huh? Yeah. Yeah. spoken to a

40:12

girl in the way this guy has.

40:15

No. But there have been times where

40:17

I've been like, I've kind of got,

40:19

like, I'm sure, not in a way

40:21

he does, but he's quite a kind

40:23

of, like, the way he kind of

40:25

looks down the camera and delivers like

40:27

this, it's almost like flirtatious in quite

40:29

a forward way that I think when

40:31

you're... a young guy like us from

40:33

from stevenage who's a bit like oh

40:35

oh oh oh sorry love you don't

40:37

want to do that no but if

40:39

you ever try it it's quite successful

40:41

does that does that make sense if

40:43

you like yeah I know what you

40:45

mean again it wasn't really in sincerity

40:47

and kind of and actually going out

40:50

on like vulnerability yeah vulnerability to say

40:52

like oh just just making a bit

40:54

of a move do you know I

40:56

mean like I've done that a couple

40:58

of times in my life and it's

41:00

It's worked man. I mean, I, I,

41:02

um... They give you a couple of

41:04

days. I, I, um... So I went

41:06

out to Fallahaki when I was 18.

41:08

Stayed there the whole summer, courting a

41:10

Slavacian girl. I was in a band.

41:12

The Slavacian girl. The Slavacian girl was

41:14

in a band. The Slavacian girl was

41:16

cheating on me with the Slavacian girl.

41:18

The Slavacian girl. The Slavic. And then

41:20

I went back the next summer in

41:22

the band again. Same lead singer? Yes,

41:25

same lead singer. I didn't even know

41:27

that. He could, yeah, he was the

41:29

manager of the bar, which is the

41:31

reason we got the game. Let buy

41:33

guns, be back on! He was a

41:35

really bad man. He was a really

41:37

bad man. He's the worst. So basically,

41:39

yeah, we, I first went out, I

41:41

think I've told this story on the

41:43

pop before, but I don't know if

41:45

I've told this. Oh, this is horrendous

41:47

actually. I first went out there. Is

41:49

it too horrendous? Just have a think.

41:51

I think we're okay. Me and Big

41:53

Dave went out there. Yeah. And you

41:55

know, we were looking for bar work,

41:57

we started working at this bar with

42:00

this guy. and their house band, their

42:02

house band, their house band for some

42:04

of the summer, they've done a runner,

42:06

they've left some instruments and they've gone

42:08

right, you can play guitar, he can

42:10

sing, you're now the band. And then

42:12

I flew out a few of my

42:14

mates, like Ollie, who played guitar, and

42:16

then I flew out a few of

42:18

my mates, like Ollie who played guitar,

42:20

Nigel, who played guitar, he can sing,

42:22

you're now the band. And then I

42:24

flew out a few of my mates,

42:26

like, Ollie, Ollie, Ollie, Ollie, Ollie, Ollie,

42:28

who played guitar, Ollie, who played guitar,

42:30

who played guitar, Ollie, who played guitar,

42:32

who played, who played, who played, who

42:34

played, who played, who played guitar, who

42:37

played, who played, who played, who played,

42:39

who played, who played, who played, who

42:41

played, who played, who played, who played,

42:43

who played, who played, As I say,

42:45

me and the band all knew each

42:47

other. We were all like 18, 19,

42:49

all we were up together around our

42:51

way. Some of them went to your

42:53

school actually rather than mine. Yes. But

42:55

then this lead singer of the band

42:57

was someone which found out there. Yeah.

42:59

And he's the worst compulsive liar I'd

43:01

ever met in my fucking life. creepiest

43:03

guy he would do strange stuff he

43:05

was he was robbing the bar the

43:07

whole time okay so he didn't own

43:09

the bar he was just managing the

43:12

bar just managing the bar he'd been

43:14

going working in this bar every summer

43:16

for like 10 years nice compulsive liar

43:18

told girls he was a primary school

43:20

teacher he wasn't but he told us

43:22

that he told that like it made

43:24

girls trust you yeah loads of horrendous

43:26

stuff he'd filmed girls when they didn't

43:28

know how does it how does it

43:30

well he told everyone he was it

43:32

he was a lot Not that it's

43:34

okay at any age, but just to

43:36

give us sense of ideas. Without them

43:38

knowing, he was filming them doing stuff

43:40

and would show us. The worst thing

43:42

he did, there was this girl, because...

43:44

Worse than that? Yeah. Oh no, why

43:47

is... Don't... There was... Yeah, basically, there

43:49

was... because there's just be girls coming

43:51

in the bar and we'd all be

43:53

chatting them up a bit and blah

43:55

blah blah. Then there's one girl who,

43:57

we would all be like, yeah, she

43:59

looks like Reese Witherspoon, doesn't she? We'd

44:01

literally call her Reese, because it's like,

44:03

oh, Reese Witherspoon, no, Reese Witherspoons, again.

44:05

And then one night, we, you know,

44:07

I say the night, early morning, where

44:09

we'd been going all night, we saw

44:11

the Reese Witherspoon girl leaving. this guy's

44:13

room right as I say this guy

44:15

we thought he was 25 looking back

44:17

he was way into his 30s clearly

44:19

but we were 18 we didn't fucking

44:21

know and he was he was a

44:24

compulsive liar and the reason I know

44:26

that it was very bad that the

44:28

reach with a spoon girl went into

44:30

his room is the handy thing when

44:32

you're out somewhere like this where most

44:34

of the people are staying in all-inclusive

44:36

hotels is if they're a different wristband

44:38

to adults and he knew that oh

44:40

man so anyway It's the

44:42

problem with this podcast. I'll start telling one

44:44

story then, I'll tell another one. All I

44:47

was going to say was, I went back

44:49

there a few years later, and it was

44:51

just a girl. What was her name? Scottish

44:53

girl. She lived in Sterling. And I just,

44:55

I was never forward with girls when I

44:58

was younger. Because girl, I just went, I

45:00

want to take you on a date tomorrow.

45:02

Okay. She was like, okay. And it's great.

45:04

But did you, and did you, did you

45:06

project a vulnerability or a sensitivity? No, no,

45:09

no, no, no, no, no. But I was

45:11

forward. In the same way, he was forward.

45:13

I was just forward. I was like, I

45:15

like you, we should go out. We could

45:17

be working much in PJ's by next week.

45:20

And the thing is, like, you think to

45:22

yourself, oh yeah, I'll fuck around, I'll be

45:24

like, you think to yourself, oh yeah, I'll

45:26

fuck around, I'll be sorry, maybe, maybe, maybe,

45:28

maybe, maybe, but maybe, but maybe get a

45:31

number, but maybe get a number, but maybe

45:33

get a number, but then, but maybe get

45:35

a number, but maybe get a number, but

45:37

then, but then, but then, or a number,

45:40

or a number, or a number, just stick

45:42

it, or a number, or a number, or

45:44

a number, or a number, or a number,

45:46

or a number, just, just, just, or a

45:48

number, just Stick it on them early and

45:51

not aggressive no like consensual like kind what

45:53

my client means yes your shoulders get out

45:55

there and stick it on them well that

45:57

is no it means be nice to them

45:59

but be assertive and if and when they

46:02

say I don't want to go on it

46:04

that's the end of the conversation but you've

46:06

been open there's no game playing there's no

46:08

nagging that was a common thing when we

46:10

were teenagers and things 1314 text it back

46:13

so I give it back so I give

46:15

it an hour mark all of all of

46:17

that be nice be direct be direct be

46:19

direct be direct and be open and honest.

46:21

That's what you're saying, isn't it? You're not

46:24

saying... Roy Keene them or like Alfinga. Don't

46:26

slide backward him. Never. Never. Don't go to

46:28

ground. If there's a rule. Don't go to

46:30

ground. Stay on your feet. Just jockey. Just

46:32

jockey. Just jockey. Just jockey. Don't get to

46:35

crap. Well now that we've solved romance for

46:37

the younger generation, shall we watch Mackey doing

46:39

a sketch? Because Mackey is a... Do you

46:41

know what? It's certain to talk to you

46:44

there, but you know how you were like,

46:46

yeah, he's a bit down with you and

46:48

Henson, he's a bit like, and I like

46:50

doing this when we get someone who is

46:52

quite new to us, because this has been

46:55

suggested by the patrons a few times. Like,

46:57

when he does the sketches, do you know

46:59

who he reminds me reminds me reminds me

47:01

of? Who know who he reminds me of?

47:03

Who know who he reminds me of, who

47:06

he reminds me of, who he reminds me

47:08

of, who he reminds me of, who he

47:10

reminds me of, who he reminds me of,

47:12

who he reminds me of, who he reminds

47:14

me of, who he reminds me of, who

47:17

he reminds me of, who he reminds me

47:19

of, who he reminds me of, who he

47:21

reminds me of, who he reminds me of,

47:23

who he reminds me of, who Yes, there

47:25

is an aldag because he's playing both sides

47:28

of the same person's personality and it's shit

47:30

and it's It's like French new wave cinema.

47:32

This is Mackey doing a sketch. And again,

47:34

the sketch is about how he sexually presents.

47:36

So it kind of follows on from what

47:39

we're talking about. Yeah, there's no way she's

47:41

grabbing that. Hey, I've become a priest. So

47:43

he's dressed as a priest. I am so

47:45

tired of people speculating our sexuality. What is

47:48

the game? Is the boy? Is the straight

47:50

just seeking attention? I always seek attention. Well,

47:52

we don't make it easy, you know, the

47:54

dresses, with the innuendos, having had a girlfriend.

47:56

We, we, we, we, we, we, we... This

47:59

is all your fault. My fault? Thank you

48:01

for agreeing with me. This is just complete

48:03

by erasure, and now I'm going to repress

48:05

my sexual emotions and become a priest, and

48:07

become a priest. And I realized how Irish

48:10

that actually Irish that actually sounds. Straight. Stop

48:12

wearing dresses. You've got jokes today. Watch sport.

48:14

I would rather die. Date someone. Fine, fine,

48:16

fine. Okay, I'll take someone I own a

48:18

date. What age is spreading? That's really creepy,

48:21

she's far too young for you. Good, nothing

48:23

says I'm a straight man more than going

48:25

after someone who's just far too young for

48:27

you. Leonardo's Capio. Leonardo's Capio. There was a

48:29

bit of acting in there, which I've seen

48:32

loads of actors do when they try and

48:34

do like acting, dialogue acting, where they go,

48:36

fine, fine, fine. that is actors always do

48:38

that I mean yeah it's just shit it's

48:40

just like what can you say how do

48:43

you analyze that it's so shit but it's

48:45

funny though because you find no it's not

48:47

funny but it's you find similarities in the

48:49

strangers places because that reminded me I don't

48:52

remember when we did this of Pete B-O-C

48:54

the Darwin Darwin-Nunez man that's a link no

48:56

one else would ever made people watching that

48:58

go That's what he's like, yeah. You know,

49:00

when like in the first series of True

49:03

Detective, Radhi Bekone, he's characters like, on fucking

49:05

crack, and he's got the big board of

49:07

everything going together. I've just got red string

49:09

going from Stuart Mackey to fucking Darwin, Darwin,

49:11

Nunez, but this is, it's all connected. So

49:14

he's like, I like that because the algorithm

49:16

has forced him, he's doing these affirmations in

49:18

the way that PBOC does his Darwin Darwin

49:20

and Nunez shit. And then PBOC did a

49:22

sketch. And similar to PBOC sketch, it's fucking

49:25

shit and there's one punchline in the whole

49:27

thing, barely. It doesn't make any sense. It

49:29

doesn't even read like a sketch, basically. You're

49:31

right. And so it's just like, then being

49:33

forced into doing different things and having to

49:36

diversify for the algorithm for the algorithm. It

49:38

breeds this really mad stuff. and stuff they're

49:40

not good at. Right. And I don't think

49:42

they would have even wanted to do, but

49:44

this is, this is, like, this is the

49:47

thing, he's an actor. Yes. And these are

49:49

things, Jake wrote. These actors, they'd have been

49:51

told what to do by, like, there's a

49:53

screenwriter, there's a director. Right. Now. Just like

49:55

porn. That

49:58

one. for me, I don't know if he

50:01

is an actor. And by the way, we've

50:03

seen no evidence of that, you know, he's

50:05

got his catchphrase where he says that his

50:07

mom's from Venezuela, I don't think, I'll be

50:09

there as it works. Jacob Hawley, I watch

50:12

poor ones and let me tell you for

50:14

something about that boy or other thing. No,

50:16

he doesn't know what's a fucking, like if

50:18

he is an actor, and by the way,

50:20

we've seen no evidence of like your much.

50:24

If you're not watching it, if you

50:26

want to tell someone you an actor,

50:28

you can, you never have to prove

50:31

it. You never have to prove it.

50:33

But like, he's not a writer, is

50:35

he? Is he? God bless him. But

50:37

poor fella. Yeah. Little else, sexy girls.

50:39

We know this as well, because, like,

50:42

comedians are now forced into being. Content

50:44

creators. We have to know how to

50:46

do lighting. Take us fucking six months

50:48

to work out to do the lighting.

50:50

We used to do it in the

50:52

dark. Yeah. We just not put out

50:55

videos. We don't know what we're fucking

50:57

doing. We don't know how to do

50:59

all this. It's taking us a year

51:01

to learn how to do all of

51:03

this. Because we don't know what we're

51:06

doing. And so maybe in the same

51:08

way that we would like a little

51:10

bit of patience, a little bit of

51:12

sympathy, when you don't get a little

51:14

bit of patience, a little bit of

51:17

sympathy. Maybe a bit of patience if

51:19

you don't mind. make a living like

51:21

we all are in the era of

51:23

late capitalism and this is a thing

51:25

I don't begrudge him that I don't

51:28

begrudge him trying to get numbers with

51:30

his sketches it's it's it's it's the

51:32

it's the it's the it's the it's

51:34

the it's the it's the it's the

51:36

win jolo to deed me yes that's

51:39

what I don't like and I you

51:41

know I'm a father yeah I got

51:43

a little girl yeah father of daughters

51:45

the daughter hopefully still one yes I

51:47

need to buy those condoms condoms man

51:50

You can't self-bell, no more self-bellying. Sorry,

51:52

I've never done that before. I feel

51:54

awful actually. Like, my biggest fear is

51:56

my daughter bringing one of these back.

51:58

Right. Let her bring... anything before this

52:01

drug dealers drug addicts yeah like I

52:03

don't mind what comes to the door

52:05

a Jacob Pauli style tart chaser yeah

52:07

yeah I don't mind a wide boy

52:09

with a heart of gold well yeah

52:12

some some fucking lanky kid who's too

52:14

loud You know, I'm searching for the

52:16

knobs to turn the volume down every

52:18

time he speaks. Give me one of

52:20

them. This is my, this is my

52:23

nightmare son-in-law. That's what this is. This

52:25

is nightmare son-in-law. It's like, oh. You're

52:27

having to go to rural island to

52:29

visit your father-in-law and your son-in-law. Yeah.

52:31

Oh shit, I hadn't thought that was

52:34

a possibility. Oh my God, my life

52:36

could get so much worse. No, how

52:38

do I stop that? She's never allowed

52:40

to be Irish people. She might as

52:42

well because it's edible. Uh, yeah. No,

52:45

no, no, oh, I'm not, yeah, this

52:47

is my nightmare, this is my nightmare,

52:49

this is my nightmare, it's my daughter,

52:51

and it like, it comes through the

52:53

door, and you go, hello, and he's

52:55

like, hello, he's an elf actually, dad,

52:58

okay, he's an elf, stew at the

53:00

elf, what do you want for dinner

53:02

steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward,

53:04

steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward,

53:06

steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward,

53:09

steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward,

53:11

steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward, steward,

53:13

steward, steward, There's a lot

53:15

of them out there, mess girls made

53:17

it all the way. You can be

53:20

by without telling anyone. Yes. Yeah, in

53:22

theory. Well, I've never seen it in

53:24

practice brother. Fuck me. But Stu's there,

53:26

he's referring to people speculating. So I

53:28

presume that he hadn't told people, who

53:30

he hadn't told people, or he hasn't,

53:32

I think he has now said he's

53:34

by. I think what he's referring to

53:36

is the fact that he'll wear dresses

53:38

in a lot of his video. wearing

53:41

a dress. No, no, no, yeah, yeah,

53:43

yeah, yeah. Which is fine, but the

53:45

way he's kind of saying it is

53:47

like he just goes to the pub

53:49

in a dress, which would be fine,

53:51

but he does not, but he doesn't.

53:53

He's playing princesses or elves in the

53:55

videos. This is it, and like, again,

53:57

wear a dress if you want. But

53:59

I feel like it because he's getting

54:02

comments on the internet be like, oh,

54:04

are you gay also? He's like, no,

54:06

I'm not gay. Actually, boy sexual. It's

54:08

like I I I find it very

54:10

performative and it's it's to perform the

54:12

Cutesy feminism Sexual ambiguity. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

54:14

I don't I don't want to I'm

54:16

not going to make any accusations that

54:18

he's pretending to come across as vulnerable

54:20

and safe in a way that might

54:23

allow other vulnerable people who want to

54:25

feel safe to be around it. I'm

54:27

not going to accuse him with that

54:29

No, he's not doing that. I'm just

54:31

going to say those words and leave

54:33

that in there. I think Stuymaki, I

54:35

mean, fair play to him, he's made

54:37

a career out of being a non-acting

54:39

actor who's kind of acting on the

54:41

internet. I mean, it's a worrying trend

54:44

because other actors are going to see

54:46

this and they're going to keep acting

54:48

instead of going and getting real jobs.

54:50

Well, there's nothing we can do about

54:52

that. I mean, see, another clip you

54:54

want to watch, is that why? There's

54:56

one we can send us on our

54:58

way, another short affirmation from Scoo. They're

55:00

all short. I will say this, for

55:02

an out of work actor. Like, he's

55:04

finding it in? Yeah. Every single one

55:07

of these is nine seconds long. You

55:09

wonder why you haven't got any fucking

55:11

parts, mate? You can't do more than

55:13

nine seconds worth of a self-tape. I

55:15

want to remind you, you deserve to

55:17

feel loved, feel loved. Have

55:19

a good day. Oh my god, the

55:21

little... Well... It's the look down, it's

55:24

the like, without feeling like you begged

55:26

food. I like... Also, one more jibe.

55:28

Go on. One more thing I'm not

55:30

happy about with this fellow. Yeah, I'm

55:32

doing my best, right? At what? Podcastasting.

55:34

Well, no. So, with the fat, yeah.

55:37

Okay. Jacob 30 at dense.co at UK

55:39

if you've got male pattern baldness, right?

55:41

And look, I'm holding on and I

55:43

feel pretty happy where I am with

55:45

the fringe at the moment. You know,

55:48

I'm slowly trying to get my way

55:50

to Turkey. True Jordi, answer the phone

55:52

brother. I don't know, when I see

55:54

a guy don't know,

55:56

when I see a

55:58

guy with that

56:01

spaniel hair. blessed. I Been

56:03

blessed. like fucking rubbing

56:05

it in my

56:07

face. in my know what I mean?

56:09

I feel like when you've got

56:11

that, mean? I like you don't have to

56:14

have all that. that, on. You don't

56:16

have to have all have all that. Come on,

56:18

bit don't have to have us a little You

56:20

of hair that we can stick

56:22

on our that. What's that thing about

56:24

the brother. Yeah. Send bowl of little wigs worth of

56:26

bit of hair for we bit hair

56:28

for the Scream on our bald. a little

56:30

bit of hair. bit of air. Well, I I

56:32

hope you feel loved and I hope

56:34

you feel you don't have to

56:37

beg for it. And have to beg neither

56:39

you, neither men or women and neither your

56:41

children, boys or girls, or ever fall

56:43

prey to a creep like this. creep like

56:45

this. God Happy new year. See you

56:47

soon. See you soon.