In this episode of We Need To Talk we’re joined by Dr. Julie Smith, a clinical psychologist, best-selling author, and online educator known for making mental health tools accessible to millions. Dive deep into the realities of self-love, how to build secure relationships, and the hidden cost of always trying to "win" in arguments. Dr. Julie shares practical strategies to manage fear, navigate uncertainty, and transform anxiety into a source of strength. 

Dr Julie’s new book Open When: A Companion for Life’s Twists and Turns is available to buy nowOpen When on Amazon: https://g2ul0.app.link/nCGOymXTzQb

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(00:00) Intro(01:43) Dr. Julie's Upbringing(04:00) Is Shyness Genetic or Learned Behavior?(06:11) Dr. Julie's Relationship With Her Husband(10:08) Why Did Dr. Julie Specialize in Clinical Psychology?(13:02) Dr. Julie's Experience Working for the NHS(16:55) Dr. Julie's Move Onto Social Media(23:10) The Success of Dr. Julie's First Book(24:40) Dr. Julie's Experience Writing Her Second Book Open When(26:15) Dr. Julie's Cancer Diagnosis(31:41) Dr. Julie's Thoughts on the Popularity of the Term "Self-Love"(34:40) What Is Metacognition?(37:23) Dr. Julie's Definition of Self-Love(40:17) How Do We Correct Our Self-Destructive Thoughts?(43:55) Keep Love Ad(44:52) Tinder Ad(45:41) What Is Dr. Julie's Definition of Self-Esteem?(50:08) How Does Confidence Relate to Self-Esteem?(54:43) How Should We Handle Criticism in Terms of Our Self-Esteem?(58:52) Do Our Values Stay the Same or Change Over Time?(1:00:07) Demonstration of Values(1:06:33) Are We More Anxious Than Ever in Society?(1:10:31) How Do We Manage the Anxieties of Modern Society?(1:14:29) Dr. Julie's Thoughts on Today's "Self-Centered" Society(1:16:57) How Do You Know if You're Ready for a Relationship?(1:18:36) Why Do We Need Relationships With Others for Our Happiness?(1:21:31) Dr. Julie's Tips for a Successful Relationship(1:24:28) Dr. Julie's Definition of Attachment Styles(1:28:01) How to Determine Your Attachment Style(1:29:52) How to Make Your Attachment Style More Secure(1:31:09) Dr. Julie's Ethos on Conflict in Relationships(1:35:15) Most Memorable Conversation(1:39:59) Paul's Takeaways(1:42:05) Adobe Express

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