0:00

Hello, darlings. Pack your suitcase

0:02

for new season of the

0:04

Hulu original reality series, Banda

0:06

Pump Villa. Let's do this.

0:08

Ciao. It's Stasi. Of course

0:10

Lisa brought in her favorite to be

0:12

resident chaperone of the castle. Stasi

0:15

is an icon. She's my eyes

0:17

and ears. I love this. Get

0:19

ready for the luxury and drama

0:21

that awaits us in Italy. Cheers

0:23

to all the toxic couples in the castle. Season

0:26

two of Banda Pump Villa is now

0:28

streaming on Hulu. Have

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you ever felt that uneasy anxiety when

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now for family favorites. We'll

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return to your podcast in a moment. This

1:02

is Dave Kaelin, Jimmy Jam, and

1:04

Kelsey Webb for us. Yep,

1:06

you have to listen to us. We have

1:08

a radio show on WNCI 97 .9, and

1:10

you must listen or we will steal

1:12

your car. Only if it's a Kia. Hey,

1:15

someone stole my daughter's Kia show.

1:17

Oh, sorry. Hurry up, they want to

1:19

get back to the podcast. Yeah, just listen to

1:21

our show every weekday morning on WNCI. And you

1:23

can also listen on the iHeart app at Dave and

1:25

Jimmy. We're not going to steal your car. OK,

1:34

I feel like we need to

1:36

start this episode how we

1:38

started Easter Church Sunday

1:40

because it was

1:42

one of those where the pastor was like, we're

1:44

always going and going and rushing. And

1:46

he's like, everyone just take a nice deep

1:49

breath. I

1:51

feel like I need that right now. It's

1:54

a lot. It's only in its early. In

1:57

the morning. It's already a lot.

2:01

I've thrown baseballs and footballs, made

2:03

lunches. Y 'all do way too

2:05

much in the morning. I

2:07

would like to say I did have a moment

2:10

this morning. got up and I got ready. No, I'm

2:12

kidding. Your kids are at a different age though.

2:14

Yeah. I mean, I helped Ramsey get ready, but like

2:16

even then she gets herself ready too. So it's

2:18

different. Like Jace is like play football. I've got Roman,

2:20

you know. Lion is in

2:22

Velcro mode, so I cannot detach

2:24

her to save my life. Like,

2:26

she's literally having the most tragic

2:28

Academy Award -winning goodbye in the driveway

2:30

this morning. Mama. And like, hand

2:32

out. Like, never let go, Jack.

2:34

I mean, it's really something. Aw.

2:36

Wait, where did she go? Maybe

2:38

I left. Oh, you left. Where

2:41

did she go? Did she go to daycare now? No.

2:44

Shout out to every single mom that gets

2:47

up every single morning and has to

2:49

get themselves in the car and get into

2:51

traffic and do all of this. I

2:53

thought of that this morning. How lucky am

2:55

I to stay home? I

2:57

look back and I'm like, I don't know

2:59

how I did that because I'm not a morning

3:01

person like we've talked about. And it's like,

3:04

get up, get ready, get all the kids to

3:06

school in daycare and then go into Nashville.

3:08

Oh, I could never do it again. No, it's

3:10

terrible. So we're

3:12

going to breathe deep breath. We're

3:15

just passing our anxiety on. what I

3:17

realized about myself is I'm a psycho

3:19

when I'm. Do you want to end

3:21

it there? That's

3:23

where my sentence ends this morning. Period.

3:25

I know when I go to my freak

3:27

out moment today was my freak out and

3:29

I know why now I go to my

3:32

freak out when I am so overwhelmed with

3:34

a million different things. Normally,

3:36

the way that a dishwasher

3:38

is loaded. This

3:43

is not where I thought this

3:45

was be. This is how I

3:47

know we're best friends. Please continue.

3:50

This is actually, this is going

3:53

to be my wine about it, but it's now just

3:55

host chat because this kind of explains, I

3:57

have another wine about it. Don't

3:59

worry, there's something there

4:01

too. Stay tuned, dearest readers.

4:05

Um, I was, um,

4:09

I have a very particular way

4:11

of how I do the dishwasher.

4:13

Now I'm very, I'd rather

4:15

though, so I don't usually freak out.

4:17

I rather just them people put them

4:19

in the dishwasher. It's fine. I will

4:21

then quietly rearrange because I love to

4:23

save space in a dishwasher. I

4:25

load it like an architect. That's

4:28

correct. And so, but

4:30

what I've realized is, and I've always

4:32

kind of wondered when this comes, but

4:34

now I know when it comes is

4:36

when I'm so overwhelmed, everything just gets,

4:38

then I explode, right? So in

4:40

the middle of throwing a football

4:42

this morning with Jace trying to make

4:45

lunches, making him, he's got like

4:47

this. He has to

4:49

memorize his street address, my phone number,

4:51

and then the spelling test. I'm working all

4:53

that in the morning, throwing footballs, like

4:55

right in his head, you know, throwing all

4:57

that. And then like rum is like,

4:59

maaah, maaah. And then I open

5:01

the dishwasher. I'm like, oh my

5:03

gosh. We

5:07

are soul mates. And

5:09

so, but then it's, but then then

5:11

I can't stop the train of like, I

5:13

see the laundry in the corner and

5:15

then, and then, you know, so it's like,

5:17

I, so when I know that there's

5:19

so many things I have to do, I

5:21

then look at everything that's left undone

5:23

and then it feels like it's all left

5:25

for me to do. Now I know

5:27

I have a very, you know, helpful partner

5:29

and all those things, but in those

5:31

moments, I can't control my explosions. And

5:34

I don't explode at anybody, but Well,

5:36

I mean, I make a little snippy.

5:39

Let me take that back.

5:41

We are so identical. was

5:43

like, wow, someone's

5:46

loading the dough, you know? So I

5:48

had a little, little, little throws there, you

5:50

know? But I can't stop it. It's

5:52

like, it's, I, I get it. It's the

5:54

wow me. And then I'm like, I

5:57

just, I, I can't stop the ball

5:59

from rolling when I feel so, and now

6:02

mind you. I'm leaving for Kentucky today.

6:04

I booked a new movie. I have a

6:06

whole entire script that I do not

6:08

know. And then I, but I, and

6:10

then I have to, you know, then I'm, I

6:12

get to do all the other things for the

6:14

kids and this, that and the other. So I

6:16

am wildly at the moment stressed and there's a

6:18

lot to do and a lot to learn and

6:20

a lot to get done before I leave today. So

6:25

I just, I just. I

6:27

feel like I just needed to

6:29

let that out. And now

6:32

that I've said it, I'm okay.

6:34

But do you know what I'm saying? Oh, I

6:36

know what you're saying, but are we

6:38

sure you're okay? Yeah, I'm good. I'll

6:40

cry about it in probably like two

6:42

minutes actually. No,

6:45

but I now know though,

6:47

I'm going to have to do

6:49

some sort of like breathing

6:51

technique or something when I get

6:53

like this, because I now

6:55

know I explode and turn psycho

6:57

over things that I don't

6:59

usually become psycho about. but

7:01

I do it when I'm overwhelmed.

7:03

So can y 'all help me to

7:05

do in that moment? I think we

7:07

can do it. I do it.

7:09

Guys, I'm a rage cleaner too, so

7:11

nothing is like, I mean. I

7:13

am folding laundry while throwing the football,

7:16

but didn't put this laundry when. I guess it's

7:18

left for me to fall this morning. For me,

7:20

it's always the fork flip in the dishwasher. Why

7:22

are they tongs down? Why are they doing that? The

7:25

cleanliness will never reach them. They

7:28

put my family loves to

7:30

put the forks every all

7:32

this has to be down.

7:35

Yes. It's all through the other way. If you

7:37

put the tongs up, if you put the forks

7:39

up, so my thing, it's like, but I usually

7:41

lay them on the top. So I've got like

7:43

a thing on the top. And then you like,

7:45

I play some very precisely. This is definitely not

7:47

what I stress about. Well, I

7:49

think it's for me, I'll just grab

7:51

control where I can grab it. And

7:54

so that's all it is. It's the

7:56

fork flipping has nothing to do with

7:58

the grand scheme of things at all.

8:00

I will say a knife will drive

8:02

me crazy because I almost kill myself

8:04

every time. Well, see, my

8:06

kids do the dishes, the older ones, they

8:09

mostly do the dishes. So it's always

8:11

wrong. So y 'all would die. Yeah. But

8:13

I'm just like whatever. But like my house

8:15

is a disaster. But,

8:17

you're so cold. It is, I am. I

8:19

am to I told you, remember we talked

8:21

about this, like I'm fine. Amy's like the

8:23

mess, you know, remember that the mess will

8:25

not be there. So I've really embraced it.

8:27

I just know now what, when I explode.

8:29

Yeah, if I'm overwhelmed about other things, so

8:31

that won't be my first. My first will

8:33

be I'm overwhelmed about the kids have this,

8:35

this, this and this, and then I'll come

8:37

home to the house dirty and then it

8:39

may throw me over the edge. Like I

8:41

didn't give a crap. the

8:44

week before that it was a mess,

8:46

but I will. But I think being

8:48

overwhelmed, I think that's normal to get.

8:51

Like when you're overwhelmed, like that's when people

8:53

get, now we can control our response

8:55

to it and how we act, I've been

8:57

told. But I'm

8:59

not really good at that either.

9:01

I think what I might struggle

9:03

with is when I come back

9:05

from the movie, I don't want

9:07

to, because this has happened before, I don't want to

9:09

come home to a big pile of laundry, right?

9:13

So I have to find a way to

9:15

say something. Yeah. Just

9:17

ask. Yeah. But like so hard

9:19

for me, you know. But

9:21

then expecting it is worse. Yeah. I mean,

9:23

it really is. It really is because you're going

9:26

to be let down. Now, I'm the laundry

9:28

person at my house. So I will 100. I

9:30

mean, Nick will do it if it's there.

9:32

Like I will 100 percent come back to laundry.

9:34

But he does the dishes when the kids

9:36

don't. Sure. 99 percent of the time he does

9:38

a lot of other stuff. But the laundry

9:40

will always be there when I get back. But

9:42

if I asked, he would do it. Yeah.

9:44

For sure. Yeah. I will have

9:46

to have to figure out how to control

9:48

when you're out of control, how to

9:51

control yourself. Well, I think, too, in those

9:53

moments, we're not only looking for control,

9:55

but probably a little efficiency, which if

9:57

things were done, then it makes it easier

9:59

for you to prep yourself and get

10:01

yourself out of here. You know where

10:03

things are. That's at least my usual frustration.

10:05

Like, even this morning, this is not

10:07

what I wanted to wear. I

10:10

could not find the sweat. I couldn't

10:12

find my sweatpants. And I just was

10:14

like, you know, you're like, yeah, and

10:16

it can't be my fault. But you

10:18

know, in that moment, it just has

10:20

to be that no one is helpful.

10:22

The truth. I just think it comes

10:24

down to expectations too. Yeah.

10:26

You know, at the end of the

10:28

day, you're bombed or you're upset because your

10:30

expectation was for someone else to help

10:32

pick up the load. even though they

10:34

didn't know that was your expectation, or

10:36

he didn't know, or the kids didn't

10:38

know. That'll

10:40

be for when I get back.

10:42

This was more just like, I

10:45

just feel like I have to,

10:47

I'm gonna have to do all the

10:49

work that I've done with Amy

10:52

about embracing the mess and all that

10:54

stuff and not letting it stress

10:56

because I've done such a good job.

10:58

Like truly I've like 180 that,

11:00

but now I know where I still

11:02

struggle is when I'm wildly stressed

11:04

and overwhelmed and feel like I've got

11:07

all these things to do and

11:09

then I look around and go is

11:11

anyone right right Is

11:13

anyone out there? Well,

11:22

I also sometimes just wonder what it's like

11:24

to be my husband in these moments

11:26

because I feel terrible for him in these

11:28

moments because he's so good. You know

11:30

what I mean? He's so helpful. So, so,

11:32

so, so, so helpful. It's almost like.

11:34

He knows I just need to like have

11:36

my freak out and then I'm like,

11:38

I love you. I'm sorry. Preston called at

11:40

my, he calls it my shell. I

11:42

go into my shell. He said, I went

11:44

into my Easter shell. He told me

11:46

on Easter, but even this morning, like he's,

11:48

you know, he is just so excited

11:50

to put a new grip on legends bat.

11:52

And so there he is just putting

11:54

a grip on legends bat and I'm making

11:56

three breakfasts and he. He has

11:58

a right today. So he's just thinking about

12:00

that, you know, and putting a grip on his

12:02

back. And I'm just over there trying to

12:04

make a shake so that I don't starve today.

12:06

I'm like, you know, just preemptively, you know,

12:08

whatever it is, it just, and I thought, I

12:10

want to, he has so much stress and

12:12

I feel like he handles it so much better

12:14

than me. He has

12:16

the weight of the world on

12:18

his shoulders currently. And you wouldn't

12:20

know that. So why am I

12:23

spirally? I don't know. It's

12:25

somebody has to be. Maybe there's one in every couple.

12:27

Catherine, you came in saying you've got a lot to talk

12:29

about. Oh, not on here.

12:33

Oh, no. Tell any things

12:35

from our dear listeners. And I actually said they're

12:37

not going to come out of my mouth. Oh.

12:39

I did. Did 'all not hear that? No.

12:41

I said things that don't need to come

12:43

out of my mouth because it was not

12:46

nice. Oh, well, okay. They're not

12:48

mean, but I felt like it was

12:50

better to keep to myself. You're not normally

12:52

a mean person. It wasn't mean. But

12:54

it wasn't like, yeah, I mean, it wasn't,

12:56

it was what you were talking about earlier. And I just

12:58

had a comment. And then I was like, you know, want to

13:00

keep that comment to myself. I'm going to be better. Sorry.

13:03

No, that's, that's

13:05

good. I mean, I've learned my lesson,

13:07

keeping my comments to myself. It's

13:10

fine. What else is going on, guys? I

13:12

would like to tell you about a Costco experience

13:14

I had. Is this a wine about it? I

13:17

don't know what it is. Put it where you

13:19

want to. I'm feeling really sad. Okay.

13:21

We'll go with wine about it. So. I

13:24

know I'm getting older. Okay.

13:26

One of my very best friends

13:29

actually at home, her son is

13:31

now engaged. Okay. Okay. She's

13:33

hot and she's like

13:35

just, you know, at 40s,

13:37

43 maybe. Right. Cause

13:40

a lot of times in my

13:43

hometown, it was prom engagement babies. Right.

13:45

So I think that because I'm

13:47

43 with a toddler, I sometimes just

13:49

don't register that there's people that will

13:51

potentially be like being a mother of

13:53

the bride right now, right? So

13:56

in Costco, I left y 'all last

13:58

week and I had to go

14:00

do the daddy daughter dance shopping. And

14:02

so I go to Costco and

14:04

guys, this, I'm not

14:06

even gonna say I'm in denial

14:09

about getting older because maybe I am.

14:11

Maybe I am because this moment

14:13

really was like a bullet. Did I

14:15

give you like an ARP card? No.

14:18

He says,

14:21

sweet Steve. At

14:23

Costco. Oh, sweet Steve at Costco.

14:26

Remind me, he's a checkout guy. He's

14:28

assisting the checkout guy. Yeah. And

14:30

I think Sharon could sense what was happening and

14:32

she could not get the train back on the

14:34

track fast enough. And so

14:36

he says to me, are you

14:38

Megan's mom? And I

14:40

said, I'm not. I'm not

14:43

Megan's mom. And he said, oh.

14:45

You look just like Megan

14:47

she works in produce Megan's old

14:49

enough to have a job

14:51

and be filing taxes and he

14:53

goes And I can tell

14:55

that Sharon is screen she's like

14:57

And I'm like no and

15:00

so I say because I'm just

15:02

trying to save myself. I

15:04

go, is Megan really kind? I

15:06

hope she's really kind. Oh,

15:08

she's kind and she's so cute.

15:10

And I was like, okay.

15:12

And then Sharon keeps saying, well,

15:15

you know that's not Megan's mom because

15:17

she doesn't look like Bob's wife. Come on

15:19

now. And I'm like, what is happening

15:21

that I at 43 will go home and

15:23

have a toddler on my hip, but

15:25

I could also be Megan who works in

15:27

Produce's mom. Guys, it really

15:29

hit me. I have a really funny story that's

15:32

very similar to that that happened to me

15:34

last night. Let me ask a

15:36

question real fast. Did we know before

15:38

this happened Steve's name, Sharon's name, and

15:40

who Megan was? Yeah, like we said

15:42

Megan, you knew who Megan was? No,

15:44

but I can assume that Megan is

15:46

old enough to drive herself to work.

15:48

Okay, we're making an assumption. She's gonna

15:50

call it a high school. I

15:53

thought you literally were like, oh, Megan

15:55

from produce. Because

15:57

Catherine has to remind me because I

15:59

was quite sad that I had a

16:01

16 -year -old daughter in my movie. And

16:04

she's like, hi. I was like,

16:06

oh, crap, that's right. People started

16:08

young. Yeah, they did. Well, even

16:10

then, I was still only 25.

16:12

So I was young. But people

16:14

start way younger than that, you

16:16

know what I mean? Right. I

16:18

did feel quite old. speaking

16:21

to that because my buddy Shane West, I'm going

16:23

to drop that name. So he texted me, you

16:25

know, the, he was the heartthrob from a walk

16:27

to remember. So we're buddies. He's,

16:29

um, he lives in Nashville. And so we've been sending scripts

16:31

kind of back and forth. And he sent me a script

16:33

last night. He's like, Hey, you'd be perfect for this role. So

16:35

I'm reading the script. And I'm like, Oh, this is awesome.

16:38

Well, she's got a 25 year old

16:40

gift. And I'm like, I don't think

16:42

I have. I

16:45

was like, I said 40s.

16:47

And I'm like, well, I am

16:49

40s. So that's, Fine, but

16:51

40s and 41 are very, they

16:54

can be very different. That kind of

16:56

hurt my heart a little bit. And the thing

16:58

is, is I'm not like, of love

17:01

being 40 though. I did say last episode, but

17:04

I, again, I do love being 40.

17:06

I think it's weird. I think maybe

17:08

because I had a baby at 41,

17:10

like I have a toddler at 43.

17:12

That's like a, I think it almost

17:14

tricks me or something. And because. Truthfully,

17:16

a lot of our friend keys

17:18

and point like a lot of us

17:20

have had babies later. So I

17:22

don't know. It just really I was

17:24

I know I'm getting older. I

17:27

love the 40s a lot actually very

17:29

empowering decade for me so far.

17:31

But like just really I thought, okay,

17:33

wow, I could be Megan's mom

17:35

Megan from produce. Was

17:37

Megan really from Produce or did you make that

17:39

up? No, she is, and I hope she's adorable. I

17:41

mean, what I wanted to say is she pretty.

17:43

You're going to go find her. Next time, going to

17:45

take a picture with Megan from Produce. Steve. Just

17:48

avoid all condoms. Same, I hate kids. Garden,

17:50

do you have Costco? Yeah. I

17:56

have had three

17:58

babies and I

18:00

have tried all

18:02

different types. of

18:04

monitors for babies.

18:06

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19:37

Parenthood looks different here. Yo,

19:40

K -Bop fans, it's your boy, Bomhan,

19:42

and I'm bringing you something epic. Introducing

19:45

the K -Factor. The podcast

19:47

that takes you straight into the heart of

19:49

K -pop. We're talking music

19:51

reviews, exclusive interviews, and deep dives

19:53

into the industry like never

19:55

before. From producers and choreographers

19:57

to idols and trainees, we're bringing

20:00

you the real stories behind the music

20:02

that you love. And

20:04

yeah, we're keeping it 100, discussing

20:06

everything from comebacks and concepts to

20:08

the mental health side of the

20:10

business. Because K -pop isn't just a

20:12

genre. It's a whole world.

20:14

And we're exploring every corner of it. And

20:17

here's the best part. Fans get

20:19

to call in, drop opinions, and even join

20:21

us live at events. You never

20:23

know where we might pop up next. So

20:25

listen to the K -factor on the

20:27

iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you

20:29

get your podcasts. This isn't just a

20:31

podcast. It's a movement. Are you

20:34

ready? Let's go. I'm

20:40

in terms of life. It's the Breakfast

20:42

Club. The world's most dangerous

20:44

morning show. Hey! Angela E. is

20:46

kind of like the big sister that

20:49

always picks in the boy. That's not

20:51

how it goes. That's not how anything

20:53

goes. Yeah, me's really like a... What

21:02

is wrong with you? All

21:16

right, so we're actually gonna go to Wine About It

21:18

now, even though I feel like our host chat was

21:20

a continuation. I feel like that happens every week. Wait,

21:22

that one with the wine about it? No, it doesn't.

21:24

No. No. I

21:27

will Megan live her best life. I just want to

21:29

stay. Anybody got one? No, you do. I

21:31

know do. I do have one. Yeah. I

21:33

was, I posted something yesterday

21:36

on my page about, I

21:38

was sitting out, it was so

21:40

sweet. So Jace had a

21:42

baseball game, Alan had his clinic

21:44

and so, Jay said, you know, can

21:46

I play for another, you know, 15 -something minutes? I

21:48

said, sure, I'm gonna be up in my office. Well,

21:50

in my office, I have got a nice little balcony,

21:52

and I like to watch a sunset at night. And

21:54

so, Jolie, same thing, like she was kind

21:56

of getting ready for bed. Well, so, I was

21:59

like, hey guys, I'm just gonna be in

22:01

my office. So she comes out, she's so sweet.

22:03

She brings her little Bible and her little

22:05

daily devotional thing. didn't ask her to do

22:07

that. And she just came out and sat in the chair

22:09

next to me. She's like, can I sit here? I'm like,

22:11

of course, like anytime. So we're sitting

22:13

there. She's just like reading a little devotional and

22:15

then picks up the Bible. And then she, you

22:17

know, she was showing me like, Noah lived 350

22:19

years. Like, so we're like just like chatting. I'm

22:21

like, I didn't know that was good. And

22:23

so just like really enjoying the moment,

22:26

right? And so I'm like, man, this

22:28

is such a peaceful moment. We're, you

22:30

know, also quiet listening to the birds.

22:32

And it's just like a beautiful thing.

22:34

And what a beautiful moment to feel

22:36

that just peace. Because I've

22:38

felt like so long, I've just

22:41

dealt with stress and anxiety and

22:43

worry and all, you know,

22:45

and past relationships or single, whatever.

22:48

And so I post just saying like, Hey,

22:50

if anyone's in the trenches right now, let

22:52

go of what's holding your peace captive. And

22:54

then I get someone that is someone that

22:56

comments back being like, Oh, easy for you

22:58

to stay in your big ass house. And

23:01

I just wanted to say So

23:03

I wrote back and I was like,

23:05

it's actually, it's not about, I was

23:07

talking about like relationships and love and

23:09

life. And my thing with, I guess

23:11

my wine about it is it's not

23:13

even that people say mean comments. It's

23:15

not about that. They're struggling with something

23:17

that they're obviously dealing with, a lack

23:19

of peace maybe in their life. I

23:21

don't know. But my thing

23:23

is my wine about it is

23:26

that you don't, for me, my

23:28

peace has never come from a

23:30

material object ever, like

23:32

ever. No matter how big

23:34

of a house I'll ever have and do

23:36

I like my card? No, but like no

23:38

matter if I've got my dream G wagon

23:40

or any I mean you guys I shop

23:42

at Amazon, you know what I mean? Like

23:45

I'm not like that but to buy expensive

23:47

clothes like that's not gonna ever like things

23:49

will never give me peace I'm gonna give

23:51

any one piece. Yeah, and so I just

23:53

I guess my wine about it is that

23:55

It just it bothers me that people think

23:57

that that's what some that that is what

24:00

will give people peace I think

24:02

people are just looking for something negative. I

24:04

don't think that they're necessarily like, yeah, I mean,

24:06

it may be, maybe there definitely are people out

24:08

there that like, man, if I just had a

24:10

bigger house, I'd be happy. If I just had

24:12

more money, I'd be happy. I do think that

24:14

there are people that feel that way. But in

24:16

that moment, I think someone's just looking for something

24:18

negative. But also like I worked my ass off

24:20

to have a nice house. I've worked my like

24:22

tail off. Not saying other people don't

24:25

work their butt off, but also like I have

24:27

grinded it. I continue to grind. I'm about to

24:29

go, you know, really

24:31

important things that I'd love to see at

24:33

the kids' school and games to go work

24:35

my ass off to provide for my family. And

24:39

again, I grew up, I had

24:41

to quit figure skating because my mom

24:43

couldn't afford lessons. And I understand

24:45

people have to, as single moms, they

24:48

can't afford certain things. And I feel

24:50

for them, but also I've always worked my

24:52

butt off so my kids don't have

24:54

to quit a sport that they love. Yeah,

24:58

I mean I just think I think that

25:00

yes agreed and I think everyone works their yeah,

25:02

you know asses off Yeah, and you know

25:04

and some people have smaller homes and people have

25:06

bigger homes some people have nicer cars people

25:08

don't have you know And it's interesting cuz like

25:10

my kids always talk about like oh, they're

25:13

rich. They're rich. I'm like why Yeah, why do

25:15

you think they're rich? Well look at that

25:17

car. That doesn't mean they're rich. Why does that

25:19

make them rich? It's weird look at that

25:21

house. That doesn't make them rich when I was

25:23

little I would have been a rich kid I

25:25

was not the rich kid. I never, yeah.

25:27

I'm saying now looking at my

25:29

like, like we were not, we were

25:32

not there. I mean, renting. I mean,

25:34

we, we were never, honestly, like

25:36

just so many things that I could

25:38

say, but I'm trying to like, but

25:40

if you like, I would consider myself

25:42

to be the rich kid now. And

25:45

that's not anything in our orbit here.

25:48

You know what I mean? Our house is

25:50

really beautiful. It's the nicest house I've

25:52

ever lived in and nicer than anything I

25:54

thought I'd live in. And

25:56

also, we've been there for nine years

25:58

and we don't want to leave

26:00

because our mortgage is low and we

26:02

have a 2 .1 interest rate. So

26:04

I think it's interesting people's perception

26:06

of our lives. Or that they automatically

26:08

go to financial piece. Yes, I

26:11

have money in the bank. I'm not in

26:13

the red. And I can understand people would

26:15

want... once I got out of the red,

26:17

yes, I had some financial peace, but I'm

26:19

never really at peace with that. Cause you

26:21

just never know, especially in my line of

26:23

work. So it's like, but that's not the

26:26

first thing that people should like, I mean,

26:28

but I guess again, people that are struggling

26:30

to buy groceries and all this, I emphasize

26:32

that I, cause I get it. I used

26:34

to steal toilet paper from my fucking work.

26:36

You know what I mean? Like I understand

26:38

being in the negative. So,

26:41

but also like the money is

26:43

not. Exactly. But the money

26:45

for me is never going to

26:47

give me peace. Right. Because

26:50

I come from the negative, had

26:52

to quit things, didn't have the

26:54

money growing up, ate literally just broccoli

26:56

for dinner. You know what I

26:58

mean? We're frozen taquitos for a year

27:00

straight. Yeah. So I do think

27:02

people's perception is probably a lot of

27:04

the... Yeah. People just don't know.

27:06

Yeah. Like Preston and I both are

27:08

scarcity mentality when it comes to that. And

27:10

I've had to like work my butt off to

27:13

get myself out of that. But

27:15

still even now I'm hustling on the

27:17

side, you know like I just can't and

27:19

he's the same way he's a preacher's

27:21

kid So he's just assumed I think you're

27:23

gonna be hustling no matter what yeah,

27:25

yeah peace from within is rich in life

27:27

Yeah, you know yeah for sure like

27:29

that is and I'm like what a glorious

27:31

feeling to be able to leave for

27:33

my movie and not worry about my husband

27:35

cheating on me or stressing about like

27:37

I get to actually go do my work

27:40

and not stress about someone cheating on

27:42

me. Cause that's what the stress I always

27:44

had and like it would happen. It

27:46

happened on a set. You know what I

27:48

mean? Like when I was somewhere. So

27:50

it's like to be able to like just

27:52

feel peace and like. Like I don't

27:54

have to I don't I don't have to

27:56

stress about that guy's really what I

27:58

was you know And I think that that

28:00

shows that in that moment what you

28:02

were posting about with your piece is what

28:04

your experience is and what has felt

28:06

you like you don't have peace So maybe

28:08

that person responding that's what makes them

28:10

feel like they don't have peace is because

28:12

they don't have enough money in the

28:14

bank Or they don't have the house that

28:16

they want so they go to an

28:18

assumption. Yeah, that's what you're talking about like

28:20

that has nothing to do with it

28:22

literally I think it's just about being like

28:24

a well -human because I honestly, a

28:26

friend of mine, Melissa, who's worked her

28:28

ass off and built a business here in

28:30

Nashville, and I'm really proud of her.

28:32

She owns a salon here and has grown

28:34

her business exponentially. And she

28:36

posted about this house, right? And it's

28:39

stunning. She's building and it is gorgeous.

28:41

No detail is left. Like it is

28:43

magic. She

28:45

had this moment. She sat on her

28:47

stairs. This is a couple of weeks ago.

28:49

And I never scroll really, but I

28:51

do love Melissa. So it was, to me,

28:53

divine intervention that I saw it happen. And

28:56

so she does this story where she just sat on

28:58

her stairs and she got really tearful. And she was like,

29:00

I didn't have money. We didn't eat. We didn't, like,

29:02

you see the shiny parts of me flying out with Carrie

29:04

Underwood and you see this and you see that. And

29:07

she was like, but that's not, like, I just want to

29:09

tell you to keep going. And it was the most

29:11

heartfelt. but I'm watching

29:13

her to be inspired, not to be

29:15

hateful. And I think that is just,

29:17

a heart posture for a lot of

29:19

people too. Yeah, that actually brings up

29:21

something that did happen that I'll wind about

29:23

if we're done with it. It's very similar.

29:25

I actually wasn't gonna talk about this, but

29:27

I was like, this is similar.

29:29

So the other day, and if

29:31

y 'all saw it, I don't really, okay, I

29:34

posted something and it

29:36

was insensitive of me. Oh,

29:38

I saw. Yeah, I know. Did you delete

29:41

it? Yeah, I it. I almost texted you and

29:43

said, I'm sure you're going to get some.

29:45

I did, yeah. So here's my

29:47

thing. It was very... I knew what

29:49

you meant. And I was, yes, I meant

29:51

it the opposite way of what it

29:53

was meant, but it came across as, I

29:56

don't even want to say what I said,

29:58

because at this point, I'm not happy with

30:00

what I did, right? Okay. But my whine

30:02

about it is not that I received, hey,

30:05

This may come across not the right way.

30:07

Maybe you should take it down. It

30:09

came, you're an asshole. You're

30:11

a terrible human. You are all the things.

30:14

And to each person that sent that,

30:16

there was probably five. I copied and

30:18

pasted and I was like, you're right.

30:20

I'm so sorry. I deleted it. That

30:22

was not my intention. But I

30:24

absolutely see where that came across that

30:26

way. But, you know,

30:28

the one that was like, you're an asshole. And I was

30:31

like, what makes you better than me? Like

30:33

what makes you better than me making

30:35

a mistake that I did not that was

30:37

not my intention For you calling me

30:39

an asshole Like what I don't understand like

30:41

in a terrible human like and then

30:43

I came coming to your you always say

30:45

gracious Assumption like I understand they don't

30:47

know me these people do not know me

30:50

there wasn't anyone I knew that responded

30:52

to me not one person The what not

30:54

that from did the sorry they didn't

30:56

respond from what you responding to them No,

30:58

I'm saying no one that responded to me

31:00

actually knows me. There were only people that

31:03

don't know me. So I get that, you

31:05

know, maybe the people that did see it,

31:07

there was gracious assumption that I didn't mean

31:09

it in that way. And they didn't take

31:11

it, you know, they didn't take it

31:13

as badly as some of the other people did. Again, I

31:15

welcomed the, hey, you need to take this down. There

31:17

was a few people that said that said, you're so right.

31:19

I took it down. Should have never said that. But

31:21

the ones that just attacked me back, I'm like, you're

31:24

no better than me. You know what

31:26

I mean? Like we all make mistakes. I

31:28

made a mistake and I shouldn't have said

31:30

what I said But like you're not better

31:32

than me and I was just so frustrated

31:34

and so like I was disappointed in myself

31:36

because I I truly did not Obviously, I

31:38

wouldn't have posted it if I thought that

31:40

I was being insensitive I wouldn't have I

31:43

don't know what I was thinking. It was

31:45

a quick whatever I really and so I

31:47

don't even want to talk about I want

31:49

to give it a whole lot of light

31:51

because I don't want other people attacking me

31:54

But I just really frustrated me because I was

31:56

like, there's no gracious assumption that, hey, maybe

31:58

she's not a terrible person. She made a mistake.

32:00

And let me just give her a little,

32:02

hey, maybe you want to take that down. Well,

32:05

I also think we are all, I actually

32:07

had this, I was DMing with

32:09

a mom last night who listens to the

32:11

podcast. And she was so

32:13

thankful for the way that we openly share

32:15

and all of the things that we say on

32:17

here. And I said, I'm really grateful for

32:19

hearts like yours because we come on here and

32:21

we just You guys there

32:23

are times and I mean this like

32:26

literally I forget that we're recording because

32:28

we're just like talking like friends and

32:30

so there is We are just being

32:32

honest and we're just being people and

32:34

it's like I Think sometimes people just

32:36

forget like we're also just moms and

32:38

humans and yeah, and yeah, and I

32:40

own my mistake like I own here's

32:43

the thing though I don't like you're

32:45

getting you're going so hard on yourself

32:47

So I knew exactly what you meant.

32:49

Yeah when And the truth is, is

32:51

like, you, you don't see from that

32:53

lens. That's my thing. I was like,

32:55

I didn't even think about it that

32:57

way. Right. You don't ever, you don't

33:00

look at people going fat, skinny. Right.

33:02

You don't, you don't look at that.

33:04

basically, I was body shaming. It, but

33:06

she, like they're bigger, like they're not,

33:08

it's not weight bigger. It was, they're

33:10

just like. And truthfully,

33:12

basically, I'll just go ahead

33:14

and say it's not

33:17

whatever. Ramsey's team was

33:19

playing another team. Were they an older

33:21

team? No. sometimes they play older.

33:23

No, they looked a lot older. Yeah.

33:25

Okay. Ramsey is,

33:28

you know, she was catching

33:30

and she just looked real. I

33:33

don't want to get attacked again for saying

33:35

it, but she was just really small. But

33:38

I'm saying she's also shorter. That's what

33:40

I said. I was watching Maria's team

33:42

yesterday because they were right next to

33:44

Jason's team. And I said, is this

33:46

an older age group? Because sometimes they

33:48

play up older age. I'm like, these

33:50

girls look so much bigger. And I

33:52

don't mean. Yes. Wide. I mean, taller.

33:54

That's what I said. So I saw

33:56

what I was like. And I was

33:58

like, oh, I know where people are

34:00

going to take. But I knew what

34:02

you meant. Right. Right. Right. And so

34:04

again, it was insensitive of me. I

34:06

was not looking at that other child

34:08

and. any negative light whatsoever. Kat, that's

34:10

just not your heart. And then coming

34:12

from Catherine. know. For

34:15

any of us, we don't ever say,

34:17

even Jolie when she was learning what

34:19

fat was like, no, we don't say

34:21

fat. And that sweet child

34:23

was not fat. And I didn't call

34:25

her fat. It just was my little

34:27

looked younger than every, you know? And

34:29

so that was kind of just my

34:31

point because she's like over here like

34:33

this little catcher, you know, whatever, either

34:35

way. it was not right of me

34:38

and I shouldn't have done it. However.

34:42

When you learn small, I have a book

34:44

that I'm reading to Jace right now,

34:46

small, big. Yeah, that's, I was

34:48

thinking height. Height, that is what I'm saying.

34:50

Yeah. So like, but there are people

34:52

are going to, people, people took the wrong

34:54

assumption. I meant height, 100%. Right. And

34:56

that's where people, and I'm like, that is,

34:58

that's awesome. You're going straight to the

35:00

negative. So just like what I'm saying. Right.

35:02

People look at it and go straight

35:04

to the negative. It's like, That is not,

35:06

now we can totally understand, which is

35:08

why in this, like, yeah, take it down

35:10

because it's gonna seem too fine. But

35:12

of course, why would you think

35:15

someone is going to say something

35:17

like that about a kid? It's

35:19

literally, Roman in

35:21

this book, small, big,

35:23

tall, you know what I mean, tall,

35:25

whatever. And that's what made me think about it, because I wasn't

35:27

gonna talk about it, because I was just like, you know,

35:29

I'm not proud of it. But that's what made me think about

35:31

it. It's like the negative. But you weren't proud of it.

35:33

It's like you didn't look at it in that lens because you're

35:35

not looking in a negative lens. know, know. So when you're

35:37

saying you're not proud, like, oh, like that, that was a, you

35:40

didn't look from a full maybe lens, but that's

35:42

not your like. Right. I mean, I think it's

35:44

looking at the intention. And again, there were a

35:46

few people that responded that was like, okay, I

35:48

appreciate it. It was slightly nice. Like you should

35:50

take this down. And like one or two people

35:52

were like, thank you. No, one person was like,

35:54

thank you. I really appreciate it. But the other

35:57

ones, you know, I was like, you know, to

35:59

the one that called me an asshole. I was

36:01

like, um, I, you know, did the same. Yes,

36:03

I'll take it down. You're right. I'd take it

36:05

down, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, but I do

36:07

not understand what makes you any better than me.

36:09

Did she respond? Uh, she goes, I just call

36:11

it like I see it. And

36:13

I said, okay. And that's it. Yeah. But

36:16

it's wild to me that she, I'm sure we're,

36:18

she's blocked on my phone. Well,

36:20

and then, you know, none of them actually

36:22

followed me. Oh, of course not. Well, the

36:24

one that said that's on mine, too, does not

36:26

follow me. So you just

36:28

came here looking, clearly, one person saw

36:30

it, told other people, and they

36:32

came to find it. Because I'm like,

36:34

y 'all don't even follow me. So

36:37

why are you even? So the

36:39

thing with this is we don't do

36:41

things perfectly, right? Sometimes we,

36:43

and we're not, don't look

36:45

at this as, my couples therapist said this

36:47

too, don't look at the person straight

36:49

as the enemy. You know, and don't look

36:51

at it straight as, as negative, right?

36:53

So don't have the thing that they have

36:55

ill intention. You do not have ill

36:57

intention. I didn't have ill intention

36:59

with my, with my post. Why do,

37:01

don't, the person that goes to comment,

37:04

first of all, why, but also if

37:06

you want to, like, don't go at

37:08

it, you're an asshole. Don't go at

37:10

it so negative. Assume that

37:12

someone is coming from a good place and

37:14

not the enemy and then have a

37:16

great conversation. You could occur. Great conversation. Then

37:18

you saw, oh, you're right. That looks insensitive. I'm going

37:20

to take it down. Yeah. But it doesn't make you

37:22

a bad person. Yeah. Oh, I actually was kind of

37:25

like, were you okay? Yeah.

37:27

I mean, because again, if I saw

37:29

something like that, I just, I cannot

37:31

imagine it doesn't make me any better

37:33

than anyone, but I cannot imagine ever

37:35

calling someone an asshole or a terrible

37:37

person or, but if I was like,

37:39

Hey, maybe if I was so

37:41

worried for that person, you know, Hey,

37:44

you might want to take this down. totally

37:46

understand. I just, I imagine

37:48

coming that negative of a place. Cause

37:50

there's literally a way to say

37:52

everything. You can tell anyone

37:54

anything. Kindly. I mean, or even

37:56

just in a different way. It

37:59

can still be like assertive and

38:01

not be horrible. Like that's what

38:03

I struggle with. I'm like, a literally a

38:05

way to say everything. And even for me,

38:07

spiraling about a dishwasher, there's always a way

38:09

I can say it to my family. Totally.

38:11

I could have. There's no point

38:13

in me saying anything. That's like at the

38:15

end the day, like, Thank you for putting the

38:17

dishes in the dishwasher. If I have a

38:19

frickin' issue of why it's not loaded right, let

38:21

me just change it. But I don't need

38:23

to be passive. Right, right, right. You know? But

38:25

like, if you wanted to, you could say

38:27

something that everyone would understand. Right, like, oh, guys,

38:29

this actually bothers me. Could we just maybe

38:31

work to try to put the bowls here? Because

38:34

that would really help mommy out. Easy,

38:36

done. What, why, why? Yeah,

38:38

but also, like, we're all

38:40

still learning. Like, I know we're 40, and

38:42

I know that sounds stupid, but like,

38:44

We're all humans, and we're all gonna make

38:46

mistakes, and we're all still learning. And

38:49

that taught me something that day, to think

38:51

past what I'm thinking and to look

38:53

at the bigger picture and what other people

38:55

could perceive this as. It's a

38:57

learning moment. up on my year anniversary of doing

38:59

that same thing. So

39:01

being more mindful of what

39:03

you say, because people, you know,

39:05

it's not nice, right? Even

39:07

though you don't mean to be. That

39:10

way. Anyways. Oh, that was a good wine. I'm

39:12

really proud of you though. Oh, well, thanks. I

39:14

was not my proudest moment, but that's okay. But

39:16

it's also, I don't like the shame that we

39:18

carry about it because I do feel like it's

39:20

like we're just being human and oops, you made

39:22

a mistake. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah.

39:24

Also like, okay. And I'm not like, that stuff

39:26

hurts. Like that stuff will throw my whole equilibrium

39:28

off for a day. will. And I literally, after

39:30

I got those and I responded, I was like,

39:32

I'm letting this go. I'm not gonna worry. My

39:34

intention was not bad. Like if I had a

39:36

bad intention and I really felt like really, really

39:38

guilty about like, okay, that was not kind, you

39:41

know? But I was like, there was no bad

39:43

intention here. I'm letting this one go. And like

39:45

no one's gonna tell me I'm an asshole or

39:47

a bad person because I know I am not.

39:49

I did not do that. four walls? What's the

39:51

truth inside your four walls? Yep. Yo,

39:59

Kpop fans, it's your boy, Bbomhan,

40:01

and I'm bringing you something epic. Introducing

40:04

the K -factor. The podcast,

40:07

it takes you straight into the heart of

40:09

K -pop. We're talking music

40:11

reviews, exclusive interviews, and deep dives

40:13

into the industry like never

40:15

before. From producers and choreographers

40:17

to idols and trainees, we're bringing

40:19

you the real stories behind the music

40:21

that you love. And

40:23

yeah, we're keeping it 100, discussing

40:25

everything from comebacks and concepts to

40:27

the mental health side of the

40:29

business. Because K -pop isn't just a

40:31

genre. It's a whole world.

40:33

And we're exploring every corner of it. And

40:36

here's the best part. Fans get

40:38

to call in, drop opinions, and even join

40:40

us live at events. You never

40:43

know where we might pop up next. So

40:45

listen to the K -factor on the

40:47

iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you

40:49

get your podcasts. This isn't just a

40:51

podcast. It's a movement. Are you

40:53

ready? Let's go. Hey,

40:59

it's Zuko and Kayla from The Wake Up

41:01

Call. Enjoy your podcast, but when you're done, don't

41:03

forget about us. We have a radio show.

41:05

We try to bring a smile to your face

41:08

every morning. We also talked to some of

41:10

the hottest country stars of today, and we like

41:12

to share some good news with that's what

41:14

I like. Because Lord knows that's hard to find.

41:16

When you're done podcasting your podcast, listen to

41:18

us at 92 .3 WCOL. Set your preset on

41:20

your radio right now, and don't forget you can

41:22

listen to us online on the I Heart

41:24

Radio app. Elizabeth

41:30

Hurley debuts her new relationship

41:32

with Billy Ray Cyrus. Happy

41:34

Easter. So apparently they are

41:36

the newest celebrity couple we did

41:39

not see coming, Hurley 59, Cyrus 63,

41:41

captioned a joint Instagram photo, kissing

41:43

Hurley during a visit to

41:45

a farm. And I have

41:47

to tell you when this

41:49

headline was sent to us

41:51

in our group, wind down,

41:54

I've always wondered who the people

41:56

were. that would zoom in on

41:59

a photo. Because there are so

42:01

many times when I'm like, gosh,

42:03

Alan, they noticed this. And I'm

42:05

like, who zooms? Who zooms in

42:07

a freaking photo? Well, you know

42:09

what? Our best friend here on the couch. Dearest

42:12

listeners, Kristen Brust, would

42:14

you like to explain yours? I was

42:16

like, no way. Are you the, my, like

42:19

someone who zooms in? I zoom in on

42:21

some photos. Really? If there's

42:23

certain things. Easter eggs? Well,

42:26

like, you Easter eggs, like little, like, you know,

42:28

clothes. Yep. No,

42:30

it just depends. What did you see on

42:32

the finger? Well, I felt

42:34

like I saw, I feel like I'm

42:37

pot stirrer. I

42:39

really want to defend myself here.

42:42

I felt like... Oh, I think

42:44

this was a fair one, by

42:46

the way. I feel like her

42:48

ring finger looked a little off.

42:51

It did. It looked photoshopped a

42:53

bit, and so I... back

42:55

in what I thought was the

42:57

trust tree. There's no trust

42:59

tree in the wind down. She

43:01

zoomed in on the photo. I said,

43:03

zoom in. I think that we have

43:05

a secret engagement. It feels like something

43:07

she has covered her finger. Never

43:09

mind. I'll just do it. Never mind. I'll just

43:12

do it for you when I zoom in. Because

43:14

I hadn't looked at it yet, so that was

43:16

helpful. I mean, something's not right with that finger.

43:18

Maybe they're engaged. Breaking news here on Wind Down.

43:20

Oh, God. Chris Christen sees if. a messed up

43:22

Photoshop on our ring finger. I did see it.

43:24

You guys, I couldn't help but see it. What

43:26

do we think of the relationship? I

43:28

didn't see that one coming, but so

43:30

cute. So cute. guys, Preston's

43:33

obsessed with this. He keeps going. You

43:35

guys, and I'm, it's weird.

43:38

both good looking. They seem happy. I

43:40

think it's funny because we all have been around

43:42

enough celebrities at this point. Everyone on these couches,

43:44

we've been around enough that I don't know that

43:46

I get super starstruck. Mine's Jessica Simpson, but even

43:49

still. It's

43:51

funny to me when someone like my

43:53

husband is like, Billy Ray, can you

43:55

believe it? Cause he's friends with him

43:57

and often he's like, Elizabeth

43:59

Hurley, like he can't, he goes, we

44:01

are driving around on our buggy last

44:03

night, sunset hunting and he goes, you

44:06

believe it baby, just over that

44:08

ridge right there. Elizabeth Hurley is probably

44:10

at Billy Ray's awesome. I was

44:12

like, what is happening

44:14

to my life? That's funny. I

44:16

think they're adorable. Yeah, I think

44:18

they're cute. Guys, I love when people find

44:20

love. Same. mean, I just hope they're happy. Yeah.

44:22

I know. And it's so cute with the

44:24

bunny ears. And he's had a rough couple, you

44:27

know, a rough go the last couple. Yeah.

44:29

I hope that he's same. He's good

44:31

and happy. Pope Francis cause of death

44:33

revealed one day after his final surprise appearance

44:35

for Easter. Thoughts on that.

44:37

I mean, you're really sad. I just couldn't

44:39

believe it kind of because he was

44:41

just there. Yeah. He I

44:43

mean, he was which is wild timing,

44:46

right? I mean, I

44:48

went back and zoomed

44:50

in. Did you

44:53

zoom into the tomb? Just to get a

44:55

well check on the guy. Well, I just

44:57

was like, that's crazy that he was able

44:59

to do that like the day before and

45:01

then literally passed the next morning. It's kind

45:03

of scary. Yeah, I was watching. It

45:05

was so sweet. She's like, Jolie, because

45:07

I sometimes sometimes have the news on in

45:09

the morning. She's like, oh, the Pope

45:11

died. And she was so sad. I was

45:13

like, well, honey, he lived a really long, beautiful life. He

45:15

helped a lot of people, and it

45:17

was really sweet. But he said,

45:20

gosh, I saw this on the news, and

45:22

he spoke about this, about technology, because,

45:24

you know, we've obviously talked about technology on

45:26

the show. How I would like for

45:28

us to look less at screens and look

45:30

each other in the eyes more. I

45:32

just thought that was so sweet. Something's

45:35

wrong if we spend more time on

45:37

our cell phones than with people. And

45:39

this was his prayer about technology just

45:41

three weeks before his passing. And

45:44

yeah, he goes, it's true. Technology

45:46

is the fruit of the intelligence

45:48

God gave us, but we need

45:50

to use it well. It

45:52

can benefit only a few while

45:54

excluding others. He

45:57

said, to use

45:59

it to unite, not to divide. And that

46:01

just goes to what we're saying in

46:03

our wine about it, where don't

46:06

go to divide on social

46:08

media, come to unite, whether,

46:10

and listen, there's obviously people

46:12

that listen to this show just to hate

46:14

on us. And

46:17

look, why? You know, just

46:19

A, if you don't like us, don't listen. And

46:22

B, try to see

46:24

from a different light. And if not, let's

46:26

talk to us about like, you know, like you

46:28

don't know, like that's when you said like

46:30

why, you know? Like, send us

46:32

a message. If there's something you don't like,

46:34

let's talk about it. I mean, let's get

46:36

a hater online. I mean, I seriously, I

46:38

don't talk to anyone like why do I

46:41

also go back to the point though, too.

46:43

It's like, you know, not everyone's going to,

46:45

going to love us and personality types just

46:47

don't mesh sometimes, but you don't need to

46:49

be rude. So you can just

46:51

step away, you know, even from saying that

46:53

I, that I Megan and produce, I'm already,

46:55

I already know the messages I'm going to

46:57

get. It's just not going to get anything.

46:59

It's a weird feeling when you. Yeah,

47:01

it's hard to like we I think we

47:03

all kind of unintentionally like walked into this

47:06

space like we didn't think Kat and I

47:08

for sure didn't think I definitely walked into

47:10

this unintentionally. Yeah, I didn't think we would

47:12

be doing this as long as we have

47:14

and it's been so fun and I would

47:16

say like it the greatness of it outweighs

47:18

tiny little turdbuggers that slide in your DMs.

47:20

Turdbuggers. It does, but there are moments like

47:22

when that happens. would like to say that

47:24

we could all be friends. Yeah. We might

47:26

not understand each other. We might, they might

47:28

not like, but if we can all just,

47:30

you guys, I've got one that hates every

47:32

single time and I just respond with kindness

47:34

every single time. And I'm like, I'm not

47:36

going to get to this level. Yeah. I

47:38

just walk. Sometimes

47:41

there's mostly. Okay. Well,

47:43

you have two million. Hi ladies. Get

47:47

ready for a long one. My best friend

47:49

and I have been friends for over 20 years.

47:51

She decided. My best friend and I have

47:53

been friends for over 20 years. She decided to

47:55

divorce her husband after him cheating on her

47:57

multiple times and him just not being a good

47:59

guy or a dad. I was extremely proud

48:01

of her for this and did my best to

48:03

support her in any way I could. She

48:05

started to date and sleep around, which again, I

48:07

supported and told her to just be careful

48:09

and be mindful about introducing guys to her kids.

48:12

She had texted me the one day saying a

48:14

guy we went to school with who graduated

48:16

with my husband and who worked with my husband

48:18

recently. slid into her DMs and asked her

48:20

out and she was really excited. When I told

48:23

my husband, he said, please tell her it's

48:25

not a good idea. He's just using her for

48:27

sex and he's abusive. I

48:29

could tell by the way he would

48:31

talk about other women he's dated. After

48:33

I texted her this, I fell asleep because

48:35

it was late and when we woke up the

48:37

next morning, my husband had text messages from

48:39

the guy threatening him and I had a text

48:41

from my best friend saying that the guy

48:43

said my husband needs to keep his mouth shut.

48:45

and a bunch of other business, nonsense. I

48:47

obviously freaked out on my best friend because

48:50

she completely betrayed my confidence and screwed my husband

48:52

over when he was only looking out for

48:54

her and her response was, I appreciate him looking

48:56

out for me, but he shouldn't say things

48:58

like that about someone unless he has concrete proof,

49:00

but I get you're mad, so I'll give

49:02

you some space. Now we've

49:04

barely spoken and it's almost six months

49:06

and we never received any type of

49:08

apology. I'd also like to point out

49:10

during us not talking, I still bought

49:14

from her school's fundraiser and dropped off

49:16

a birthday gift for her daughter, but

49:18

she got nothing for my daughter for

49:20

her birthday. My question is, am I

49:22

the asshole here? Asshole just seems to

49:24

be a trend on this week's show.

49:27

Am I wrong for being pissed off? I want to

49:29

reach out and talk to her, but I'm still

49:31

extremely hurt and pissed off that she not only betrayed

49:33

me, but my husband. And I feel like she

49:35

really owes him an apology. It's just sad. Over 20

49:37

years of friendship, our daughters were best friends. And

49:39

I feel like I don't even know who she is

49:41

anymore. Oh, a

49:44

tough one. She's not

49:46

an asshole. I agree. You're not an

49:48

asshole. No, you're really. No, I mean,

49:50

she was just looking out for her.

49:53

But by the same token, I

49:56

don't think that the friend necessarily

49:58

betrayed her in a sense that

50:00

I feel like it would be

50:02

easy for that person in that

50:04

position to go to the guy

50:06

and be like, hey, Like

50:08

why are these you know are they saying

50:11

stuff about you with not an intention for him

50:13

to go then and like threaten them and

50:15

do all that you see what I'm saying like

50:17

I don't think that the friend's intention was

50:19

to necessarily betray her friend either. I think she

50:21

was just trying to get answers probably and

50:23

trying to figure out, like if I told you

50:25

something about someone you're dating, you're probably gonna

50:27

go to them and be like, hey, why is

50:29

so -and -so saying that you did X, Y,

50:31

And you can't get mad at me for saying

50:33

that. No. Because obviously I'd wanna know. You

50:36

can expect, like I would expect if I'm telling

50:38

you something like that, that it's probably going

50:40

to get back to that person. So

50:42

I don't think she was an

50:44

asshole. I think she was trying to...

50:46

you know, look out for her

50:48

friend and that's, but sometimes unfortunately things

50:50

like this happen when you're trying,

50:52

when you're, you know, I think everyone's

50:55

intentions were good, but it kind

50:57

of went south, unfortunately. Having said that,

50:59

the guy then sending threatening messages to

51:02

her husband, like that just should

51:04

show the friend. Yeah. His character, because

51:06

if I heard someone say something

51:08

and that, you know, this has happened

51:10

in the past before, I've then

51:12

gone to the person said, Hey, Can

51:14

we talk this out because I'd love

51:17

there must be a misunderstanding come from

51:19

me at least with a place of

51:21

Kindness but for the due to just

51:23

straight up start threatening that kind of

51:25

does validate what has been saying yeah

51:27

guys I'm gonna go against a little

51:29

bit what you're saying okay I Don't

51:32

think she should have mentioned it to

51:34

that guy at all. I think there's

51:36

a way to protect your friend the

51:38

friend. I think that the Yeah, maybe

51:40

not say yeah needed to have been

51:42

more protective of where I got that

51:44

information because That's really That's really just

51:47

throwing your your og friend under the

51:49

bus for a dude that you don't

51:51

even know I would say like a

51:53

friend. I heard this from someone. Yeah,

51:55

like ideally go to the person and

51:57

not say who I think you can

51:59

get answers without even saying you heard

52:02

anything I think you can ask

52:04

really intelligent questions without even saying you heard

52:06

anything and just make him kind of answer things

52:08

and get your own. Like know what you

52:10

know. Right. Know what you know, keep it in

52:12

like a little file folder, but then like

52:14

ask without throwing a friend under the bus. Because

52:16

she really was trying to be protective of

52:18

her and she didn't get protected back and I

52:21

hate that. Yeah, I

52:23

agree. I just, I

52:25

think to make, it sounds

52:27

like she still wants this friendship, but

52:29

she's hurt. So I think that if she

52:31

can see it as, you know,

52:33

maybe her intention was not to hurt you,

52:35

it really was just to get an answer.

52:37

But she made a mistake and she didn't

52:39

protect her. Like I think that that could

52:41

bring them together to have a conversation and

52:43

to understand a little bit of like, again,

52:45

the intentions, it might not

52:47

have been right, but the intentions

52:50

I don't think were on both

52:52

sides to me, it sounds like

52:54

the intentions were not bad intentions.

52:56

I'm shooting this one over to

52:58

you because you have had a

53:00

friend breakup that was hard that

53:02

you then reconciled. You

53:04

reached out to her, right? Because she said

53:06

basically, I feel like she owes me

53:08

an apology. And that person wasn't

53:10

going to give you an apology because they

53:13

didn't think they did anything wrong. But the

53:15

relationship was really important to you. So to

53:17

help someone that has had a falling out

53:19

with a friend that wants to, but probably

53:21

knows they're not going to get the apology,

53:23

how do you do it? Yeah, that's been

53:25

a really hard one for me. Have

53:27

felt in the past like I've kind

53:29

of always been the with my family a

53:32

lot with other things like I'm always

53:34

one that has to say sorry I'm always

53:36

one why can't someone else say sorry,

53:38

but with that friendship break up which has

53:40

been reconciled I was like that for

53:42

a while like I need to apologize I

53:44

was finally was like if I want

53:46

this friendship the only way is that I

53:48

go to her and I apologize because

53:50

she's not gonna do it and I can

53:52

be mad about that I can be

53:54

whatever but At this point, it's my choice

53:56

to either save this friendship or not

53:58

save this friendship. Because it was going to

54:00

go one way or the other. It

54:02

was going to go one way or the

54:05

other. And I've had a friendship go

54:07

the other. I'm not coming

54:09

back and saying I'm sorry. Because that

54:11

one, yeah, that one, like, you

54:13

know, so I'm not saying that one friendship

54:15

was more important over the other, but at the

54:17

same time, sometimes you do have to look

54:19

at friendships and go, okay, is it worth just

54:21

going, all right, I'm hurt, but I'm going

54:23

to come to you and apologize anyway. I apologize

54:25

for my part in it, but this is

54:27

what hurt me. And that's what I did with

54:29

my friend. We sat down, we did that.

54:31

She got to say what hurt her, the reason

54:34

she wasn't in a place to come to

54:36

me and apologize. And I just, you know, even

54:38

in that conversation, did I feel 100 %? Did

54:40

I feel like she really kind of owned

54:42

up to her part? No, I didn't. But I

54:44

decided that I was going to put that

54:46

aside for our friendship to be able to move

54:48

forward. So I guess

54:51

to our dearest

54:53

listener, is that friendship

54:56

worth, you know, doing

54:58

and putting aside your probably not going

55:00

to get an apology. I also

55:02

think a little time. Apology. It's been

55:04

six months. Well, I had probably

55:07

four to six months maybe. My best

55:09

friend and I broke up for

55:11

five years. Five years and

55:13

she's the love of my life. But

55:15

she was going through a divorce. And

55:17

it was just a trickier headspace for

55:19

her. We had a big blowout where she

55:21

thought I said something, I apologize. And

55:23

I remember I just said, I will not

55:25

fight with you. I love you too

55:27

much. I won't. And five

55:30

years later, we

55:32

both came back to get, we have been inseparable

55:34

since. So I do think sometimes

55:36

it's like, you just need a breather and

55:38

you just, and she's going, going through

55:40

a divorce is hard, hard. And

55:42

so. Well, and I think you can get,

55:44

and I'm learning this cause I'm the worst at this. I

55:47

think you can get so stuck in the

55:49

weeds and the details that like, you're not

55:51

gonna be, you're not gonna, you think you're

55:53

right. I think I'm right. Us discussing every

55:55

little detail is gonna get us nowhere. And

55:57

then you just have to go, you

56:00

just gotta throw it up and say, if it's worth

56:02

it, like, say your piece. I

56:04

think you have to say I was her and

56:06

you know, whatever, but sometimes you're not gonna get

56:08

it with a specific situation. She's gonna

56:10

think she's right. You're gonna think you're right. And you're

56:12

just gonna have to go, you know what? That's

56:14

okay. I love you too much. Like you said, we're

56:16

just not going to fight about it. Let's move

56:18

on. Yeah. And if it really matters to you, you're

56:20

going to have to be the person that. Yeah.

56:23

And sometimes that's hard. Oh, yeah.

56:25

To be that person. Oh, yeah.

56:27

Yeah. And I, you

56:29

know, yeah, the person, our little

56:31

front break up that we had with someone else,

56:34

I haven't, I'm okay

56:36

not reaching out. Well,

56:38

I feel like we both did. Well, we

56:40

tried, yeah. And so that's why I think

56:42

I feel okay. And then she tried to

56:44

not see me in Pottery Barn even when

56:46

I saw her and then she avoided me.

56:48

I was like, no, what friend would do

56:50

that? Like no real friend would purposely avoid,

56:52

like what? That's what I'm saying. I think

56:54

that we feel okay about it because we

56:56

did try. We didn't just talking. I was

56:58

like, let's talk to me when you're ready.

57:00

I would love to have a conversation and

57:02

it was then their choice. So at that

57:04

point. It wasn't important enough to them. Right.

57:07

to then. And then that's when I think

57:09

you have to go. And maybe if you do

57:11

go to this friend and she doesn't want

57:13

to talk or she doesn't want, it might not

57:15

be important to her now. She's obviously going

57:18

through a lot, whatever she may not want to.

57:20

But I have a friend that a separate

57:22

friend that we went through something similar and we

57:24

never got back together. Yeah. And it was

57:26

25. Yeah, it was like 20 years. And

57:28

honestly, it's weird to say it now.

57:30

I'm what a gift. Yeah. because who

57:33

I had to be to participate in

57:35

that friendship was not, did not fit

57:37

anymore. Yeah. So, so true. I remember

57:39

I had a friend break up with

57:41

someone. We were on a show together

57:43

and we had a friend break up.

57:45

We got back together for dinner when

57:47

I was in San Francisco playing a

57:49

show. And I thought maybe we would

57:51

then be friends because we were friends

57:53

for so many years, but it was

57:55

realizing that the girl that I was

57:57

in that I was so controlled by

57:59

her. And then I was

58:01

like, wait a minute, I actually

58:03

am okay having peace within our

58:06

breakup and then going separate ways.

58:08

That's right. So you start to

58:10

realize things too. feel that

58:12

if this doesn't reconcile that the world is

58:14

over because I know that is mourning the loss

58:16

of someone still alive is gotta be one

58:18

of the hardest things to do humanly. Friendship breakups

58:20

are not easy. Hard, yeah. That's

58:23

like a whole other episode, right? Yeah. Trying to

58:25

work through that. But Hope it all works out.

58:27

If it really, yes, if it really is out.

58:29

you, Reach out at least so you

58:31

know that you tried. And, you

58:34

know, if it's important to you. Okay,

58:36

Okay, ladies, I got go to Kentucky. So

58:38

So see you later. Bye.

58:40

Bye. Bye. Bye.