0:00

You made it weird. You

0:02

made it weird. You made

0:04

it weird. You made it

0:07

weird. You made it weird.

0:09

You made it weird. With

0:12

Pete Holmes. What's happening, weirdos?

0:14

This is the incredible. Hilarious.

0:17

Brilliant, even. I'm

0:19

gonna say brilliant,

0:21

even. Russell Howard, who I

0:24

feel very kinship with immediately. His

0:26

stand-up is hilarious. I enjoy everything

0:28

he has to say, and I

0:30

feel like he might be the

0:32

British me, the English me. I'll

0:34

even say the English me. Not

0:36

sure which, if that's any different.

0:38

But he's wonderful, he's here. You

0:40

can check out his new special,

0:42

Russell Howard, live at the London

0:44

Palladium. The way, I think the

0:46

easiest way to find it is

0:48

just search Russell. Russell Howard New

0:50

Special, that's what I did. Or

0:52

you can go to Russell dash

0:54

howard.co.uk. Who wants, don't do that.

0:56

Just type Russell Howard New Special

0:58

in and you can stream it

1:00

directly from his website. And I

1:02

highly, highly recommend it. You can

1:04

also see his tour dates on

1:06

there. All that sort of stuff.

1:08

There's lots of content, but check

1:10

out the new one. That's the

1:12

one we're talking about here. It

1:14

is incredible and I'm so glad

1:16

that I met this hilarious person.

1:18

I'm also on the road, just

1:20

real quick. Gonna mention some of

1:22

my dates. We got Austin coming

1:24

up and then St. Louis, Toronto,

1:26

LA. Nashville, Irvine, California, San Jose,

1:28

Houston, Texas, Royal Oak, Michigan, Washington,

1:30

Washington, D.C. and Boston, Massachusetts. This

1:32

is the PG-13, which is a

1:34

mostly clean comedy tour. I'd like

1:36

to point out Nate Vargas, is

1:38

like G. Jim Gafigan, maybe PG,

1:40

is a PG-13. So it's a

1:42

little bit naughty, but not over

1:44

the top, which sometimes, you know,

1:46

I like to be over the

1:48

top. This is a little bit

1:50

cleaner. You'll like it. I hope

1:52

you like it. Pete holmes.com. It's my

1:55

favorite hour that I've done in a

1:57

very long time. I'm really excited for

1:59

you guys to see it. Pete holmes.com

2:02

for tickets to all of those. And

2:04

in the meantime, enjoy this chat with

2:06

the incredible Russell Howard, his new special,

2:08

Live at the London Palladium,

2:11

is out now, on his website,

2:13

get into it. Well, welcome. Hello,

2:15

nice to meet you. Don't turn

2:17

on your comedy persona. Okay, sorry.

2:19

It's nice to me, you know.

2:21

It is nice to you, Kay

2:24

Kay. Yeah. I know it's sincerely

2:26

great to meet you. I know

2:28

it's sincerely great to you. I was listening

2:30

to your special, listening because I was

2:32

driving here. And my wife and I

2:34

both had an earbud in. We had

2:36

our daughter in the back and she's

2:39

watching some Japanese. Solid parents of cartoons.

2:41

Yeah. You have a kid, don't you?

2:43

Yeah. How very dare you? He's nine

2:45

months old. Okay, so you'll see when

2:47

he's six. You're going to have one

2:49

earbud in watching my special and going.

2:51

We barely kept laughing at moments that

2:54

were appropriate for what she was watching

2:56

So she thought we were watching when

2:58

she was like it was very interesting

3:00

because if we were very insane and

3:02

I was like baby we were connected

3:04

Yeah, but here's what I wanted to say

3:06

like we were dying laughing Again because I

3:09

was driving just listening to it like as

3:11

an album and I was blown away. I

3:13

really think you're How are you on common

3:15

moments? Is this gonna weird you out? Yeah,

3:17

I'm very English on compliments, isn't it? I

3:20

think, I always think that's the best. Good

3:22

man. Yeah, good man. It's alright. But it's

3:24

a really good way of freaking out English

3:26

comics of just if you like when they're

3:29

on stage. Yeah. It happens a lot here

3:31

that the audiences would just go, I love

3:33

you. And then you have to destroy it.

3:35

Yeah. And then start attacking yourself. Well you

3:37

haven't been brought up as like a

3:40

legend or like my favorite comedian or

3:42

like this guy's my inspiration or anything

3:44

like that. No. I'm sure you have.

3:46

You don't listen to the introsin' the

3:48

intros. But it's that weird thing of

3:50

like I don't know. Why is it? How do

3:52

you react? If someone in the crowd

3:54

went, I love you, it just then

3:56

creates this sort of comedic tension that

3:58

you have to pop. I'll just go

4:01

I love you too and

4:03

just keep going yeah I

4:06

felt it would go I

4:08

think he said I love

4:10

you but Something like, but I

4:13

want you to know I'm seeing other people. Oh

4:15

really? He had a little line for it. Yeah,

4:17

but I know what you mean. But that's beautifully

4:19

robotic from him to kind of like, well this

4:21

has happened enough times. Yes. I need a three-point

4:23

move to get out of it. Yes, he shoots

4:25

it from the hip. Yeah. Well, okay, so compliments

4:27

aside, I will cool it on the compliments. We

4:29

were dying laughing and then my wife was like,

4:31

he's like he's like you, like you, and I'm

4:33

not trying to sidle up, and I'm not trying

4:35

to sidle up to sidle up to sidle up

4:37

to your greatness. We have some similarities. I think

4:39

we do, yeah. Yeah, and you do jokes about

4:41

your joke. You do jokes about how you

4:43

interpret your joke, how they're interpreting your

4:45

joke. You're very there. It sounds like

4:47

I'm complimenting myself. I'm just saying not

4:50

every comedian is that way. Yeah. And

4:52

then you're also... This is where I

4:54

think you differ from me. You're firing

4:56

at a caliber that I'm not and

4:58

I think it's amazing the speed at

5:00

which every joke is really lean. You're

5:03

like really running quite fast. It doesn't

5:05

feel like that But I think if

5:07

you look at it, you're like wow

5:09

this guy's really trimmed the fat off

5:11

of everything. Yeah, it's in and out.

5:13

Yeah, what is your that's my first

5:16

question and it's a sincere question. It's

5:18

not just to get you talking what

5:20

is your process are you writing from

5:22

stage or do you write properly sitting

5:24

down or bit of both so I

5:26

did a TV show for years and

5:28

so I was a comic and then

5:30

I started doing a TV show and

5:32

realized how much fun writing is and

5:35

writing with I wrote with four of

5:37

my friends and it was a topical

5:39

show so we you know and having

5:41

to use yeah and then having to

5:43

write jokes about Brexit every week and

5:45

then trying to find that something that

5:47

was kind of original had a twist

5:49

had a twist. I had a twist.

5:51

you then sort of evolve and then

5:53

performing. I kind of have

5:56

an idea, write it, perform

5:58

it on stage, get... their feedback

6:00

the audience lets you get somewhere

6:02

else yeah and then you I always

6:05

call it like crystallizing the language becomes

6:07

crystallized like I've got this bit at

6:09

the minute about having a colonoscopy and

6:12

there's kind of six lines in there

6:14

that I really like and I probably

6:16

wrote 20 yeah originally you do 20

6:19

and I just don't have that I

6:21

don't know it's a it's a different

6:23

thing in England where the audience will

6:26

let you know, alright mate, enough. Yeah, interesting.

6:28

You know, I think, I think I'm probably

6:30

tighter, I think, because they just get bored

6:32

quicker in the UK. Yeah, I think so.

6:35

They don't let, they're not interesting letting you

6:37

luxuriate in the bit. It's like, got it,

6:39

mate, understand it, nice imagery, next, you know

6:41

what I mean, it's sort of... Tick the

6:44

box. Yeah, we got it, we got it,

6:46

we do smell our own farts here, and

6:48

we do smell our own farts here and

6:51

I'm not even saying that as a horrible

6:53

thing. I'm editing my special right now and

6:55

my dear friend Neil Brennan was like

6:57

cut this out this is where you're

6:59

laughing yourself this is where you're joking

7:01

the joke and I'm like but that's

7:03

me yeah like so I'm trying to

7:05

fight but I wonder if England would

7:07

scare me into you you're me in

7:09

England yeah I don't show you Very

7:11

happy we both have a lot of

7:13

teeth. Yes, like there are there are

7:15

similarities But also like I've seen you

7:18

a stand-up and you I think probably

7:20

a similarity we have is we clearly

7:22

both enjoy doing stand-up Yes, and that's

7:24

the thing for me It's such a

7:26

it's such a great art form. Yeah, it's

7:28

the only thing in the world having done

7:30

TV stuff where if you have an idea

7:32

You can then go on stage and explore

7:35

it and I was in Texas so then

7:37

I had like 20 seconds on buckies. And

7:39

I was like, oh, this is really funny.

7:41

And you know, and you kind of, and

7:44

then you suddenly get to Arizona and it

7:46

doesn't mean anything. Yeah, yeah. But that's what

7:48

I love about it is that you can

7:50

kind of, me too. You know, like, and

7:53

what I'm deeply envious of here is, and

7:55

it's sort of through, like, I guess,

7:57

from Carlin onwards, there seems

7:59

to be this. kind of culture where the

8:01

audience lets you be in a state

8:03

of permanent becoming. So you can kind

8:05

of go up and do an hour and then

8:07

go look I've got notes. you know and they

8:10

like it they and they love it here

8:12

in England now they'd be furious like I've

8:14

paid 30 quid you fucking kunt and you're

8:16

gonna say a little bonus a little reprieve

8:18

definitely really yeah this makes me I've never

8:21

toured the you have to but it's because

8:23

I think it makes me scared but you

8:25

do it when you've got a show but

8:27

it's that thing of it it's just the

8:29

culture here because you're working towards the special

8:31

right so as a comic it's fantastic and

8:34

the fact that the audience enjoy being part

8:36

of being part of the pro Right, but

8:38

not in it, really, really. Yeah, yeah. I would

8:40

say the same in Europe. It's that, you know, if you

8:42

pulled notes out in like Sweden, you know, it would be

8:44

like, we've paid many krona and this is how you treat

8:46

us. We've gotten babysitters. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's German. No, but

8:48

yeah, you always got German. Have you gig much in Europe?

8:50

Never, not once. In fact, when I've been there, I've been

8:52

there, I've been there, I've been there, I've been scared, I've

8:55

been scared, I've been scared, I've been scared, I've been scared,

8:57

I've been scared, I've been scared, I've been scared, I've been

8:59

scared, I've been scared, I've been scared, I've been scared, I've

9:01

been scared, I've been scared, I've been scared, I've

9:03

been scared, I've been scared, I've been

9:05

scared, I've been scared, I've been, I

9:07

do it wrong. I'd want to watch

9:09

for a while. But the fear is

9:11

so fascinating. It's that because you're such

9:13

an alien in the culture and then

9:15

you sort of end up learning so

9:17

much about yourself and your culture. That's

9:19

what I do as an English bloke.

9:21

I'm just kind of, we're so close

9:24

to Scandinavia and yet so different. Yes.

9:26

And then your sort of powers of

9:28

observation. Like I was doing this thing

9:30

about, I find Scandinavia fascinating because you

9:32

know they went from Vikings to

9:34

recycling like in terms of an

9:36

evolution the fact that ragna Lothbrook

9:38

was burning villages and raping your

9:40

pillaging and then 800 years later

9:42

ABBA like right you know what

9:44

I mean that's a lot of

9:46

carbon yeah you're burning down a

9:48

village that's a lot of carbon

9:50

that's what I mean but but

9:52

so as an outsider you're able

9:54

to go wow you've gone from

9:56

Vikings to an unbelievably progressive state

9:58

you're a bluebin yeah But you

10:00

know what I mean? You

10:02

might not necessarily see it.

10:04

I remember seeing Malaney do

10:06

this brilliant bit about in

10:08

London. There were statues of

10:11

dogs that had fought in World War

10:13

II. And I've seen that statue. And

10:15

I've never seen how funny that was.

10:17

But it took an outsider to come

10:19

in and go. and so John Malaney

10:21

was there just going to the dogs

10:24

for in and suddenly opened up. Yeah,

10:26

you know what I mean? It's something

10:28

about being the outside. Fresh eyes. Yeah,

10:30

it's fresh eyes. Well, what is, I'm

10:32

sure, I don't want to burden you

10:35

with this, but I imagine that in America we

10:37

have a lot of like swinging dick. cowboy stuff

10:39

like there's a lot of winning in our comedy

10:41

there's a lot of like yeah we have the

10:43

last word yeah we were smart yeah we were

10:45

good like I this is I'm not gonna tell

10:47

the whole story but I just went on like

10:49

a meditation retreat and I did stand up there

10:51

wow I know that's a tough room yes thank

10:53

you wow I've been waiting for this I didn't

10:56

know I was waiting for that yeah yeah yeah

10:58

so of course I love these people and it's

11:00

a very hearty and it's a very hearty and

11:02

I'm looking at my hard space and I'm looking

11:04

at my stand- 15 minutes on the retreat, that's

11:06

too short, and then I'll do like 15

11:08

minutes in my act. And I'm going over

11:11

my act and I'm like, I'm like you, I

11:13

think people perceive us as nice, or at

11:15

least having fun, happy, whatever. And I'm like,

11:17

so many of these bits, the undercurrent of

11:19

them, we're like, I'm winning and I'm being

11:22

a bit of a toot. That's interesting. Yeah.

11:24

So I'm like cut that, cut that,

11:26

cut that, trying to find the most

11:28

hard opening, hard opening bits. So did

11:31

you, and did you from that think

11:33

I want to be different? Or was

11:35

it the stuff won't work for this

11:37

room? It was just that room.

11:40

Yeah, and in fact, if I

11:42

airlifted that, all of those people

11:44

into the comedy store, I'd be

11:46

like, now you deal with this.

11:48

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Because I

11:50

think I'm being honest about the

11:52

human experience. Yeah, it's not all

11:54

meditation retreat. No. But it's like,

11:57

it's a terrifying blissed out corporate

11:59

would be. you know, you find whoever

12:01

runs it and you destroy them. But

12:03

if you do that at a meditation,

12:05

it's just like, well, and the teacher

12:07

is, it's just size. That's true. And

12:09

the teacher is English and I did

12:12

go at him a little bit because

12:14

it was his birthday and I made

12:16

fun of him a little bit and

12:18

I made fun of him a little

12:20

bit and like every, and I gave

12:22

the crowd so much shit for leaving

12:24

me alone because they didn't laugh. What

12:27

was the purpose of the meditation retreat?

12:29

It was, well, it's an Englishman, it's Rupert

12:31

Spiro, a teacher that I love very much. I

12:33

thought you were showing me a movie. No, no,

12:35

no, I was just, sorry, sorry, sorry. Wow. It

12:37

was, it was just to, a lot of it

12:40

is to do with the community and you meditate

12:42

and your meals are taking care of,

12:44

I mean, you have a nine month

12:46

old, you can imagine how amazing that

12:48

is just knowing your food, there's a

12:50

lot of quiet time. but meditation and

12:52

talks on non-duality. Nice. My

12:55

friend John has done a

12:57

lot of that, he's done

12:59

a lot of silent retreats.

13:01

Oh yeah. And I, the thing

13:04

I find funny about a silent

13:06

retreat is there must be that

13:08

moment. At the end of it,

13:10

where you have to talk about it.

13:12

to then go through it. And there's something,

13:14

the irony is so funny that you do

13:17

it and then you can't wait to chat

13:19

about it. Of course, and ruin it sort

13:21

of. That's how I felt the first time

13:23

I took mushrooms. That was a big breakthrough

13:25

for me as I went, I'm having this

13:28

ineffable experience and I go, fuck. I'm

13:30

going to have to talk about this.

13:32

And ruin it. It's like how you

13:34

met your wife becomes a story. And

13:36

it becomes a groove in your brain.

13:39

Then the birth of your child will

13:41

even become like a story and a

13:43

groove in your brain. That's what our

13:45

brains do. Yeah. And particularly as a

13:47

comic, it's that weird thing when you

13:49

have a special moment. And it's become

13:52

like a varnished routine. And you go

13:54

that isn't the same as the moment.

13:56

That's right. That's another great Malaneyini bit.

13:58

He goes when you're dating. You're like,

14:00

we were kids, and we were on the

14:02

train tracks, and there was a swamp near

14:04

my house, and my friend, we called him

14:06

Pudge. We wouldn't call him Pudge now, but

14:09

we called him Pudge, I'm making all this

14:11

up. And then he's like, and then after

14:13

you've had five, six girlfriends, you go, when I

14:15

was eight, I saw a dead body. That's not a

14:17

joke about dating, that's a joke about our brains.

14:19

And how we process, and we do that to

14:21

people. And we do that to people. You know,

14:23

it's very tempting even in this moment to

14:26

go, all right, Russell, he's British, he's probably

14:28

this way. Or he's a comic, he might

14:30

be this way. And we miss out on

14:32

so much. Yeah. It's funny, isn't it? Like

14:34

I'm just sort of instantly thinking now,

14:36

does that still happen though? Because presumably

14:39

if you're young now, you're just dating

14:41

through apps. So all of that is,

14:43

I would imagine there's a lot of

14:45

copy and paste. Do you know what

14:47

I mean? Where you've done your intro

14:49

and you probably send it out like

14:52

a net. Just to kind of, do

14:54

you know what I mean? There might

14:56

be, like, An AI component

14:58

in the future. This person is going to

15:00

brief you. Like instead of a dating app,

15:02

there might be an AI that goes like,

15:05

well, Russell Howard is single and this, you

15:07

know, some of his previous data said this

15:09

about him. Here's why I think you might

15:11

work together and you can talk about them

15:14

and be like, well, I'm a little nervous.

15:16

Well, he looks this way, but I get

15:18

the sense. Like they'll talk to you about

15:20

it and really prime you. And listen, I

15:23

know AI bad, but I wouldn't entirely not,

15:25

I mean I'd be up for, like, young

15:27

me, like if there was a, like, remember

15:29

Ziggy from Quantum Leap, like, you need to,

15:32

you know, I don't, but some sort of

15:34

robot helper that would just be there to

15:36

kind of... Oh, it's like a classic, he's

15:38

in every episode? It waits, it's, so I

15:41

think, Al. is the guy in quantum leap

15:43

and he had a machine called Ziggy that

15:45

kind of news stuff. See, I just did

15:48

it. You're so British I just assumed you

15:50

meant Dr. Who. That's literally what just happened.

15:52

Yeah, that's literally what we were talking

15:54

about. I literally went, you mean Dr.

15:56

Who. Yes, I do remember Ziggy from

15:58

quantum. But just that. I can't believe

16:00

that just, I know, but that kind

16:02

of, just the idea of having a

16:05

robot helper. Yes. Because I just had

16:07

my dad, and you know, sort of

16:09

say, oh, do you think I should

16:11

wear this? And he'd be like, yeah.

16:13

That's right. That's it. Well, when I

16:16

think about the preposterous good fortune that

16:18

when I went on my first date

16:20

with my now wife, that we did

16:22

line up in all of these ways,

16:24

but that is truly romantic. and now

16:26

people are just trying to hedge their

16:28

bets and line up in 14 out

16:31

of 15 ways and then go on

16:33

the date. But the problem with that

16:35

is then the app will tell you

16:37

the other 300 people that you're 14

16:39

or maybe 15 out of 15 matches

16:41

and now you're a novelty addict and you

16:43

just keep going on other dates. As opposed to when

16:46

I matched 15 out of 15 with my wife, sorry,

16:48

flirt. But I did. I was like, oh my God,

16:50

it had a preciousness to it that I didn't have

16:52

an AI assistant going like, there's also another woman. Do

16:54

you like brunettes? You know, there was no kind of

16:57

FOMO because you couldn't believe that there was a girl

16:59

sat next to you. Do you know what I mean?

17:01

And it was sort of that thing of going, why

17:03

would you possibly that, you know, there was no TV

17:05

remote, there was no kind of flick to others? What

17:08

was your first date with your first date with

17:10

your with your with your with your with your

17:12

with your with your with your with your wife?

17:14

We were with your with your with your with

17:16

your with your with your wife? We were, with

17:18

your wife? Isn't that cute? I know a good

17:20

place for clams. And we go and eat clams.

17:22

I want to say, this is going to make

17:24

you love my wife. We're listening to your special.

17:26

She pauses at it. I'm like, what's up? And

17:28

she goes, that bit you have, because I told

17:31

her a bit this morning, it was a story.

17:33

I'm not. a jackass doing bits. I was like,

17:35

I think that might be something. She's like, that

17:37

goes with your joke about, I have

17:39

a joke about polyamery. And I go

17:41

like this, you just said it to

17:43

me basically. I go, I'm just so

17:46

taken with girls. I can't believe there's

17:48

a girl that lives in my house.

17:50

Like I'm still sort of a junior

17:53

high boy. She sleeps in my bed.

17:55

And I've never been looking at her

17:57

and going like, you stay here. I

18:00

don't have FOMO, I'm not like,

18:02

you're great, but I'm not, like,

18:04

it's not one of my things.

18:07

Yeah, I'm, and instantly, I'm, like,

18:09

the comics brand, isn't it? I'm

18:11

imagining their little Chinese kid got

18:13

Mr. Home, Mr. Home, Mr. Home.

18:16

Are you talking about the funniest

18:18

part of the funniest part? When

18:20

you're in the club, yeah, that

18:22

Indiana Jones, as a verb has

18:24

always been my favorite. younger than

18:27

I am. And I got married a

18:29

year before you. So we're on a

18:31

very, so I'm 46 year, 45 this

18:33

month. March 30, March 23rd. So we're

18:35

very close, we're aries, and we were

18:37

essentially on the exact same track getting

18:39

married. Yeah, one year apart. How old

18:41

are your kids? Have you got kids?

18:43

She's six, my daughter six. Yeah, so

18:45

we're a little off there. A little

18:47

off there, but, and what does your

18:49

wife do? She's a doctor, I'm just

18:51

kidding you. She's a doctor. I don't

18:53

know why I did that to you.

18:55

She's making short films. Oh great. She

18:58

teaches dance. Oh great. And she

19:00

does a little bit of mindfulness

19:02

stuff. She's just brilliant. She's amazing,

19:04

I love her. So yeah, it's...

19:06

But your wife's a doctor. My wife is a

19:08

doctor and it's what's interesting. Doctors and comedians are

19:10

very similar brains I think. Is that true? Yeah

19:12

really like there's quite a lot of comics in

19:15

the UK that used to be doctors but it's

19:17

that same I see my wife and I see

19:19

her friends retrieve that they go into their brain

19:21

and they retrieve the information needed to heal. or

19:23

deal with a problem and we do exactly the

19:25

same. Oh my god. But it's just pointlessness. So

19:27

you would say clams, my brain is going, do

19:29

I have any information? Oh thank you. Do I

19:32

have anything about clams? You know, do I have,

19:34

I might have a thing about prawns, but we're

19:36

going through your books. Totally. We're in our offices

19:38

with all the leather-bound books and those are our references.

19:40

And those are our references, like, I have some brain.

19:42

It's the same brain. It's exactly the same, it's exactly

19:44

the same, it's exactly the same, it's exactly the same,

19:47

it's exactly the same, it's exactly the same, it's exactly

19:49

the same. It's just, it's just, it's just, it's just,

19:51

it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just,

19:53

it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just,

19:55

it's just, it's just, it you know, the kind of

19:58

inconsequential, but it's consequential for a laugh and a moment.

20:00

They're so, it's so interesting. But it also

20:02

causes, look, we can't, I'll, as the host,

20:04

I'll keep us away from comedians celebrating their

20:06

craft too much. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm

20:08

celebrating brains. I like true. Our brains are

20:11

great. That's great. Doctors' brains are great. So

20:13

we're safe there. I think we're safe. Yeah,

20:15

I'm just, I'm just noting that. I feel like

20:17

for the first 10 years of

20:19

podcasting that's all we did. You

20:21

know what I mean? So I'm

20:23

just noting. But I also think

20:25

there's something about causing a reaction.

20:27

Like it's ingredients for something to

20:29

change, like a pill or a

20:32

practice or whatever, changes you internally

20:34

and a way music does and

20:36

therapy does and massage might, all

20:38

these things are just, people want

20:40

to feel differently. Yes. Have you

20:42

noticed? Yeah, well that's the thing it

20:44

feels at the moment it I don't

20:46

know that it feels like there's so

20:49

much potential for Performance that's how I

20:51

feel like that right don't you think

20:53

I think there's The very fact that

20:55

people are willing to sit in a

20:57

room with us and not be on

21:00

their phones. So you like nobody has

21:02

an audience as captive as us at

21:04

the moment. It's extraordinary. I completely agree.

21:06

Isn't that weird? And you're suddenly hyper

21:08

aware of it and you kind of,

21:10

I find myself going, God, there's got

21:13

to be some place, there's some show

21:15

that you can get to where people

21:17

are like, and they kind of come

21:19

out with that wild. I'm not saying

21:21

I've got there, but it's that particularly...

21:23

If you go to gigs where people

21:25

don't have, where they have the yonder

21:28

pouches, I've never done that, but I've

21:30

been to shows where people do it.

21:32

And because you don't have your

21:35

friend, you know, slash enemy that is

21:37

your phone, you're forced to be at

21:39

the gig and talk to people and

21:42

look around at people and it's, that

21:44

doesn't happen ever, ever. So it's so

21:46

brilliant. I agree. I find that a

21:49

lot of people even without the baggies

21:51

though. seem to seize the opportunity to

21:53

be like if they understand we're

21:56

making this together. We're the instrument.

21:58

We're more than the instrument. where

22:00

the real-time arbiter of

22:02

what the show is, where it

22:04

goes and all that stuff, that

22:06

they lean, a lot of my

22:08

crowds, I haven't seen a lot

22:10

of phones. No. Which is nice.

22:12

Yeah. Without the bags. Yeah.

22:14

Like they want it, we crave

22:17

it. Are you want to at

22:19

the minute? Yeah. Are you on

22:21

tour in the minute? Yeah. Great.

22:24

And when does the special come

22:26

out? We just edited it. I

22:28

hung out with Neil. He came

22:30

on my podcast and he's a

22:33

good mate of Jimmy cars. And

22:35

it's really interesting that he's, he's,

22:37

he's, that was the name I

22:40

was looking for, Jimmy Carr came

22:42

from medicine. He used to Kavorkian

22:44

people, right? No, Jimmy used to help

22:46

them. No, no, no, he used to

22:49

work. He worked in, he worked for

22:51

an oil company. Oh, did he? Yeah,

22:53

yeah, it's not. Say it. I worked.

22:56

Jimmy Carr? Oil for cars? Yeah, it's

22:58

fucking crazy. So the first time I

23:00

met Jimmy, I was 18 and he

23:03

was 28 and we were in a

23:05

new act competition in England and he

23:07

looked me up and down and said,

23:10

my God, I bet you go on

23:12

a lot of caravan holidays. And he

23:14

was right. You know, and you kind

23:17

of like, we couldn't be more different.

23:19

But we like instantly, it was that,

23:21

you know. It was a very good

23:23

assessment. That's hilarious. He's a good egg.

23:26

But he was telling me about Neil

23:28

and we kind of hung out, but

23:30

he sort of has that. He feels like,

23:32

he's almost like... Like he's got like a

23:34

comedy scalpel Neil Brennan. Do you know what

23:36

I mean? It's just that feel similar to

23:38

Jimmy in a sense that He gives me

23:40

these notes and there's he does not fluff

23:42

them Yeah, he's not like first and foremost

23:45

brilliant. Yeah, loved it He just kind of

23:47

starts telling you and he goes that goes

23:49

in the bin like that's a poll quote

23:51

from the email Yeah, you know where that

23:53

goes in the bin and I'm just like

23:55

wow but like I and then he text

23:57

me is like did I send you too

23:59

many notes? No, it was like an

24:01

older brother who just wants me to

24:03

stop being bullied in middle school. You

24:06

know what I mean? I had that

24:08

energy. It was like, please stop wearing

24:10

those shoes or whatever it is. My

24:12

brother told me to stop wearing my

24:15

crucifix outside of my black tournel neck.

24:17

He was like, you look like a

24:19

nun. That's loving. That's actually helpful. Yes.

24:21

Thank you. I wish someone else had

24:24

told me, maybe mom. Yeah, yeah. But

24:26

then that's instantly funny as well that

24:28

you're just getting sartorial advice from your

24:30

old, is it older brother? Yeah, lovely.

24:32

Yeah, yeah. But it's that, I just

24:34

filmed it but we haven't sold it

24:36

anywhere, but it's been the least unpleasant

24:38

to edit. You know what I mean?

24:40

Like I'm squirming and I'm like, I

24:42

like this. It's funny like when you

24:44

first start doing it. like we used

24:47

to have it in the UK where

24:49

you'd have to then go in and

24:51

watch your special with like some sound

24:53

guys and other people it's the worst

24:55

experience in the world isn't it it's

24:57

just like it's still rough oh man

24:59

but it's like that bit in finding

25:01

Neverland when he's sort of outside and

25:03

everyone's kind of watching the the play

25:05

and he's just tapping away I can't

25:07

yeah I can't imagine what that's like

25:09

to to kind of be a live

25:11

premiere of your show and you're

25:13

kind of having to sit there.

25:15

I think a lot of them

25:17

leave. Of course. Yeah. You gotta

25:20

leave. The sociopath stays. Yeah. Laughing.

25:22

But then it would be interesting.

25:24

There's a brilliant story about how

25:26

airplane was made. They basically toured it

25:28

around college campuses. So it was originally like

25:30

a two-hour show. They would play it, listen

25:32

to the laughs and just cut jokes out.

25:34

And it's kind of probably why that film

25:36

is so tight and so funny. Because that's

25:38

kind of what we do. So it took

25:40

like a long answer to your question about

25:42

why is my stuff tight? Because I toured

25:44

it for like... you know 18 months yeah

25:46

so you suddenly end up going i don't

25:48

need that bit i don't need that bit

25:50

i don't need that bit and because you

25:52

you end up with like two hours yeah

25:54

it's kind of fine to have an hour

25:57

yeah it's that for me it's my stuff's

25:59

only ever been kind of average when

26:01

you've recorded it too soon. Do you

26:03

know what I mean? And you're like,

26:05

it's not quite finished. I'm with you.

26:08

I actually re-filmed, re-taped my special. Yeah.

26:10

Yeah. And it wasn't a costly production,

26:12

so it wasn't a huge deal. Yeah.

26:14

And I was like, it wasn't a

26:17

costly production, so it wasn't a huge

26:19

deal. Yeah. And I was like, 15

26:21

is a pretty big deal. Yeah. Yeah.

26:23

So the difference between an A between

26:26

an A and a and a B

26:28

and a B. Definitely. I couldn't care

26:30

more. I really care about this

26:32

question. It's like, where do you

26:35

draw the line? Burbigli and I

26:37

talk about this all the time. You do

26:39

it too much. You start to hate

26:41

it. But you don't do it enough.

26:43

Most specials I watch and I go, they

26:45

should have toured it more. Some specials I

26:47

watch and I go, they toured it too

26:50

much. Yes. And it's not shots fired. If

26:52

you watch Seinfeld's, I'm telling you for the

26:54

last time, he fucking hates that hour. Yeah.

26:56

You can see it. I would say that

26:58

to him. That's not shit talk. It's just

27:00

like, he did that because they wanted to

27:02

hear the classics. You can see

27:04

on his face. His resting face between bits

27:07

is this. Yeah. and you're like yeah he

27:09

doesn't like it anymore I completely get it

27:11

so how do you know when it's time

27:14

to film I think I don't know is

27:16

the answer to the question you never

27:18

know until you don't get tired of it

27:20

I tend to rotate stuff in so it's

27:22

kind of you know I'll get I

27:25

think when you travel you know stuff

27:27

I've got this funny in Denmark that

27:29

doesn't work here but then stuff that's

27:31

funny in England so you kind of

27:33

if you're doing like an hour and

27:35

20 let's 20 let's a you're always

27:38

cutting stuff out. So it keeps it

27:40

fresh? I think so, yeah. You mix

27:42

up the order too? Yeah, yeah. That

27:44

really helps. I put myself, I find

27:47

putting yourself in trouble is a great

27:49

way because then you just kind of,

27:51

but you end up then... Putting yourself

27:53

in trouble, but like if you start

27:56

the show with something strange, then

27:58

you will like, but you always... find

28:00

your way out of it because there's

28:02

nothing quite like a thousand people to

28:04

make your brain go you better say

28:06

funny now. We're exactly the same. Yeah

28:08

and Louis scandal noted complications noted had

28:11

that great thing where he's like he'd

28:13

do his closer at the beginning yeah

28:15

and then he's like it would just

28:17

make the next joke better because you

28:19

have to yeah because your brain is

28:21

just like okay they're here now yeah

28:23

here's a question for you ever so

28:26

you're really Englanding your act and cutting

28:28

out fat Making a bulletproof. I

28:30

just did this so it's a

28:32

leading question. I cut this joke. I

28:34

had this joke. It's actually about

28:36

What was it about? Oh, it was about

28:38

eating ants in Mexico And they served

28:40

as ant tacos. Okay, and they we

28:43

didn't order them they just brought it

28:45

to us right so this whole bit

28:47

about it so loads of ants or

28:49

like it was a ant puree. Oh

28:51

wow. Yeah, it was a puree. That's

28:53

like a colony that's to get that's

28:55

a lot of death Jesus Christ. What

28:57

you mean? Yeah, dozens. Yeah. It's a

28:59

thousand things. Yeah, a thousand things for

29:01

me. Which is really what made me

29:03

enjoy it. But I did that story

29:05

so many times about eating ants, eating

29:08

ants, the line that I do want to

29:10

tell you is, they just put it down,

29:12

they go, they asked us before the meal

29:14

if we had any allergies or food restrictions.

29:16

but I didn't know how far back I

29:18

had to take that. Then they go, these

29:20

are ants, and I go, I also don't

29:23

eat loose nickels or urinal cakes, which is

29:25

a big line. I just wanted to tell

29:27

you that as a comic. And then I

29:29

cut it because it was slowing the bit down, but

29:31

then I'm doing the special, and I go. I brought it back, I

29:33

don't want to be culturally insensitive, but the whole planet knows eating ants

29:35

is weird. You know how I know, we have an animal called the

29:37

ante eater, and I do this thing about the ante eater, and it's

29:39

about how the headlining oddity is what it's eating. It's like a really

29:41

weird animal, and I cut it because it was slowing me down in

29:44

the clubs, but then when I was doing the taping, I'm bringing it

29:46

back, have you ever brought something back? Yeah, definitely, or it's an or

29:48

it just, or it just, or it just, or it just, I often

29:50

think we're just, I often think we're special, I often think we're special,

29:52

I often think we're special, it was special, it was just, it was

29:54

just, it was just, it was just, it was just, it was just,

29:56

it was just, it was just, it was just, it was just, it's

29:58

like, it's like, it's like, it's like, like, If you're, when

30:00

they're picking a team to go to

30:02

a soccer World Cup, there's always one

30:05

player that sneaks in right at the

30:07

last minute. He goes on a run

30:09

of form and you just can't not,

30:11

and then they go on to do

30:13

nothing for the rest of it. And

30:15

it's sort of that thing, you have

30:17

jokes where they just, they arrive two

30:19

weeks before, you know, and it's kind

30:22

of, and it's that thing you're so

30:24

frustrated because you go, God, I only

30:26

got to play with that for two

30:28

weeks. um yeah how unfair it is

30:30

that it like if babies touch dog

30:32

shit they can go blind and what

30:34

do they get would they go blind

30:36

a dog like that and it was

30:38

just this thing of like how how

30:40

unfair that was but and it just

30:42

you know and it's that was all

30:45

it was I kind of had it

30:47

for like two weeks and then it

30:49

ended up in a special but it's

30:51

I know what you mean it's like

30:53

some bits that kind of They come

30:55

back to life. They come back to

30:57

life and it's also, I think that's

30:59

the exciting thing about putting them away

31:01

and doing stuff and then coming back

31:03

to it late and then being able

31:05

to, it's a brilliant, I remember, I

31:07

saw a thing on Instagram from Tika

31:10

Wahiti and he was saying the way

31:12

he writes his films is he kind

31:14

of, he writes the screenplay and then

31:16

he puts it away, he's got obviously

31:18

loads of stuff that he's working on.

31:20

puts it away for like a year

31:22

and then comes back and then reads

31:24

it And then puts it down and then

31:27

reads it again puts it and

31:29

reads it and then writes Everything

31:31

he can remember from memory and

31:33

then that's the kind of process

31:35

and I think there's a lot to

31:37

that of like you know you first

31:39

have that idea about the ants and

31:41

you it's all comes out and you

31:43

get a bit bored of it and

31:45

then suddenly your brain is gone It's

31:48

really funny that bit. You do realize it's

31:50

funny. You just got bored of saying it.

31:52

But it's really funny. And sometimes a joke

31:54

isn't reliable in the sense that you can't

31:56

just say it. And the ante to part

31:59

is a performer. Like it really depends on

32:01

me. I bet you play a great ante

32:03

to life. Do you know what I mean?

32:05

I bet you're really flinging your arms about.

32:08

I can see it visually. Do you know

32:10

what I mean? It is very funny to

32:12

talk about this so seriously. But I think

32:14

one of the reasons we cut jokes is

32:17

because it's a fatigue, meaning if it was

32:19

easy to do, maybe you would keep it,

32:21

but there's a certain... It's not funny enough

32:23

to just say it. So going back to

32:26

Neil Brennan, Neil's jokes are just funny enough

32:28

to say. And he would agree. You just

32:30

say him. Stephen Wright is the same

32:32

thing. It's just funny enough to

32:34

say. Guys like me, I'm like,

32:36

I really got to put my

32:38

back into anteater or it just

32:40

doesn't work. And that's it and

32:42

if you want to put your

32:44

back into an ear, it's fine.

32:46

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's why you're

32:48

resting. Anything worse than a half-hearted

32:50

impression of an ant ear. Yeah,

32:52

nobody wants it. Just an audience

32:54

going, what is this? Well, it's

32:56

funny. I was reading that prior,

32:58

prior is obviously one of all

33:00

of our influences, is going, what is

33:03

this? Well, it's funny, I was reading

33:05

that prior, prior is one of all

33:07

of this. Ideas sometimes yeah, I've

33:09

just been living with this dumb idea

33:12

get get out of here Yeah, it

33:14

comes back and we fuck like rabbits

33:16

Absolutely, I often think of new ideas

33:18

as like babies and you're showing the

33:20

audience babies And then the audience kills

33:23

the baby and then you go okay

33:25

fine, but know this now backstage. I'm

33:27

gonna resuscitate that baby and then bring

33:29

that dead baby out again and then

33:32

another audience might trample it. Yeah, but

33:34

You know, you just never, that's what's exciting.

33:36

It's just kind of, we're making a

33:38

constant stew and all the everything goes

33:40

in. And even if it doesn't work

33:43

now in three years time, you know,

33:45

that's the funny thing is that we've

33:47

always got something we come back to,

33:49

you think, you know, like, my dad

33:51

used to kind of hit me when

33:53

I was a kid. And I've often,

33:55

you know, and it's fine, it's just

33:58

like growing up in the 80s. about

34:00

it and I just can't make

34:02

it funny but there is stuff

34:04

but there's something in it. Every

34:07

time. Do you know what I

34:09

mean? There's an Emerson quote, Ralph

34:11

Waldo, where he goes, no, I'm

34:13

sorry, it's, it might be thorough,

34:15

I'm embarrassed now, but it's, I

34:18

think it's thorough. He says to

34:20

think what's right for you is

34:22

right for everybody is genius, and

34:24

that's a tricky thing to say

34:26

in this day and age with

34:29

so much narcissism and all of

34:31

this stuff. But creatively speaking, for

34:33

you to be like, I know

34:35

this is funny, like a creative.

34:37

stubbornness. Yeah. Because I've watched people

34:39

walk away from things that I'm

34:41

like, that's the funniest thing I've

34:43

ever heard. Yeah. And they're just

34:45

missing that extra dollop of arrogance

34:48

that makes them go like, no,

34:50

we're all gonna dance to this

34:52

one. Yeah, it's funny, isn't it?

34:54

But that's what, to go back, it's

34:56

just like, I just loved it as an

34:58

art form because you can just have an

35:00

idea and you know, just something can

35:02

happen or just. You know, it's the

35:04

best man. Yeah. So much fun. Well

35:06

you can do it that day. Yeah.

35:09

And then, and it's a thing or

35:11

it's not a thing and like my

35:13

wife went to a tarrow reading in

35:15

San Antonio and like she was taking

35:17

my son. to the bus as I was

35:19

walking to the stage. And I was like,

35:21

how was the terror? And she went, we'll

35:23

discuss later. And so I then had to

35:25

go on stage, go, you don't know what's

35:28

looming. But there, you know what I mean?

35:30

And then it was a bit like, this

35:32

person I don't know is shed something, and

35:34

it's a bit like getting attacked for the

35:36

way you've behaved in someone's dream, where you're

35:39

like, how am I being held accountable? That

35:41

was this kind of funny weird thing. No,

35:43

it's joy. And then when you do, and

35:45

I love doing television and film, but you

35:47

recognize the freedom, the grotesque freedom that we

35:50

have as stand-ups. You can't just go and

35:52

be like, this terror thing, or if you

35:54

do, you'll be wasting everyone's time. We're not

35:57

going to use this. No, exactly. This is

35:59

a drama. Have you done like directing or

36:01

anything like that? I've directed some smart things

36:03

and I really enjoyed it. Yeah, because I

36:06

think that is the oddly the closest thing.

36:08

To stand up. Yeah, I think so, because

36:10

you're then getting to kind of orchestrate the

36:12

whole thing. Yeah. Rather than, you know, be

36:15

the kind of start. It's like, no, no,

36:17

no, if you do that. You know what

36:19

I mean, it's kind of, so you have.

36:21

No, no, no. But I think that would

36:23

be, that would be, well, well, well, well,

36:26

well, well, well, you're strangely, I just, you

36:28

were talking about modern mammals, I shoot these

36:30

commercials for them, I work with them. Yeah.

36:32

And it was just, you know, little ads,

36:35

little social media ads. And I got such

36:37

a juice out of it. I was saving,

36:39

my friend is in a giant fake shampoo

36:41

costume, we're discussing how it should like shoot

36:44

out of his head and like where the

36:46

camera should be. And I went home and

36:48

I was like, I said devout, my wife,

36:50

I was like. I don't know why that

36:52

made me happier than I imagined. It shouldn't

36:55

have been that fun. And it was directing.

36:57

And Greta Gerweig, when she did

36:59

Lady Bird, she was an actor,

37:01

obviously she is an actor, but

37:03

she said, watching other people say

37:05

my words and I could like poke

37:08

and persuade, was the most satisfying thing

37:10

she had ever done. So it's been

37:12

curious to me ever since then.

37:14

We did one sort of film thing

37:17

in the UK. I wrote it with

37:19

my friend Steve and seeing actors bring

37:21

your words to life was really, it

37:23

was absolutely brilliant. There was a guy

37:25

that played my brother. What fascinated me

37:27

most is that, so lines on paper,

37:29

you were like, that is fine, I

37:31

know that's funny because... there is a

37:33

joke there and I see it and

37:36

obviously people don't always talk in jokes

37:38

so it's yeah it's that thing but

37:40

he was able to make sniffing funny

37:42

do you know what I mean and

37:44

you would never put you'd never put on

37:46

the script he sniffs yeah you know and

37:48

then we go and that is funny because

37:51

I've seen him sniff yeah he was this

37:53

way he was able to go and it

37:55

just be so nonchalant and oh he

37:57

was so brilliant and you just go that

37:59

that to me was the different thing

38:01

between seeing an actor and a comedian

38:04

who knows how to deliver a line.

38:06

He was like, he's weird. He's genuinely

38:08

created this. Yeah, this guy. And he's

38:10

got. And he was doing these kind of

38:13

like mannerisms you're like wow like it was

38:15

so cool to see actual actors doing it

38:17

and you're like going I would never think

38:19

to kind of but we would never say

38:21

a line when I watch TV I'm often

38:24

like wow why did that joke work they

38:26

said it wrong yeah that's how I feel

38:28

like they hit the word wrong and I

38:30

would have flown in and then been like

38:33

oh really is a funny word but it

38:35

works in fact I would say a lot

38:37

of the what we consider the great actors

38:39

are often saying it Because entertainment is

38:41

surprised, right? So they're saying in

38:44

a way that you wouldn't have

38:46

predicted. Whereas comedians often say things,

38:48

I feel like we lean into

38:51

the cadence that is the most

38:53

funny and people love it. Not

38:55

too many comedians are being like,

38:58

surprising in that way. That's more

39:00

of an acting thing. I don't know,

39:02

I'm thinking out loud. Yeah. Have you

39:04

ever seen a ghost? Do you know,

39:07

English people see ghosts? You know. Great

39:09

name though. Yeah and he's exactly how

39:11

you'd imagine but he looks like he

39:13

lingers in stately homes. You know what

39:16

I mean? Like if you and if

39:18

you if you were to Google like

39:20

for anyone listening to this Google Jacob

39:22

Reesmog now and it'll be the

39:24

photo of him at the House

39:27

of Commons leaning down. There you

39:29

go. Now tell me that doesn't

39:31

look like a cool. a ghoul

39:33

that you would see haunting the

39:36

corridors and possibly going mother like

39:38

it has that kind of yeah

39:40

we haven't seen it goes my

39:43

mom when our first dog Bonnie

39:45

died the day after she died

39:47

there was a deer at

39:49

our window and um don't

39:51

mind me taking a note

39:53

no no of course this

39:56

deer appeared at our window

39:58

we still living the And

40:00

my mum was like, that's Bonnie, she's

40:02

come back. Because there was a TV

40:04

sitcom called Coronation Street and my mum

40:06

was like, Bonnie used to watch Coronation

40:08

Street with me and she's come back

40:10

as a deer to watch the episode.

40:12

So I guess that's the closest I've

40:14

seen a dog come back as a

40:16

deer to watch a sitcom with my

40:18

mum. Wow, which is pretty, you know,

40:20

it's not, is it a ghost? That's

40:23

reincarnation, so no. Yeah, but I want

40:25

to know the age of the deer,

40:27

how long, it was a fully grown

40:29

deer? Yeah, it was a fully grown

40:32

deer. And when did the dog die?

40:34

The dog died the day before and

40:36

then came back. As a deer? Is

40:38

it a deer? Is it a deer?

40:41

any analysis but my mom was in

40:43

that stage that stage of mourning that

40:45

any kind of rational analysis absolutely you're

40:48

talking absolute shit woman your dog's dead

40:50

Now watch your stories. I walk

40:52

in and go, how old is

40:54

that dear? Just ruining it? Just

40:56

give it to her. Yeah, exactly.

40:58

How about anything unexplainable? I'm sure

41:00

your wife is going to tarot

41:02

readers. Have you ever had a

41:04

psychic be right on the money?

41:06

Have you ever, UFO, Alien, something

41:08

strange? I went to an alien

41:10

abductee survival club. Pardon? Yeah, yeah.

41:12

For a TV show I did

41:14

with my mom. That was in

41:16

Nevada. Gosh, haven't aliens got a

41:18

type. They do. They do. They

41:21

do. They do. They do. Is

41:23

it that a brilliant strategy? That

41:25

was kind of folk. And no

41:28

one will believe them. That might

41:30

be dismissive. I was trying to

41:32

think what was the question if

41:35

I ever had anything. What was

41:37

that like? What was that like?

41:39

It was wild. It was so...

41:42

pure Americana that these people like

41:44

had all been abducted by aliens

41:46

they all had stories that there

41:48

was a lady that kept being

41:51

taken up to a ship and she would

41:53

like the aliens would make her go

41:55

to school and then I was going

41:57

Jesus like you feel like you're done

42:00

school and now these fuckers like that and

42:02

trying to sort of make light of it

42:04

and she was like no no I actually

42:06

like the lessons you're like of course you

42:08

know so I just felt like it was

42:11

it was so brilliant and so weird

42:13

and then we met a lady that

42:15

could talk to aliens and she was

42:18

telling me about the language and and

42:20

my mom was going did you feel

42:22

anything I sort of I slightly felt

42:24

like my testicles were getting slightly hotter

42:27

and then that became like this whole

42:29

thing of like yeah well you know,

42:31

later on, how's your nuts, because I

42:33

said me and my mama having this

42:36

sort of weird conversation. But so when

42:38

you're in that situation, if you're me,

42:40

you're burdened with like, do I

42:42

believe these people? And you probably go

42:45

and going like, no, did anybody

42:47

go like, I don't know, this

42:49

guy seems like he was taken.

42:51

No, no, it was, it was

42:53

clearly just like they needed something.

42:55

Yeah. And, you know, that's kind of

42:57

how I feel with a lot of stuff.

42:59

I don't believe, like, spiritualist churches, not

43:01

for me, but the people that go

43:03

to a spiritualist church, they miss their

43:05

loved ones and they need to hear

43:08

them. And who are you to take

43:10

that from them? Right. But, yeah. Rationally,

43:12

because it's always the same, I've been

43:14

and it's always like, I'm getting a

43:17

voice, is there a Barbara here? There's

43:19

a Dave. He says he loves you,

43:21

he says, go on me your life.

43:23

He says he wants you to be

43:26

happy. It's always like that and he's

43:28

beautiful. But it's never like, is there

43:30

an Alan? Yep, it's Michael, he says

43:32

collapse the foot dungeon, they know everything.

43:34

Like it's never, but there's never an

43:36

awful person. But there's never kind of

43:39

like, like, I'm getting an adult, I'm

43:41

getting a Jeffrey. Like, do you know,

43:43

it's like when people at previous lives,

43:45

they're always Joan of Arc, or, yeah.

43:47

Do you know, I had a brilliant

43:50

story, there was a comic that

43:52

I forget her name, she was

43:54

supporting me in Canada, and her

43:56

friend was backstage, and she was

43:58

doing hypnotherapy. but she

44:00

was doing it on the zoom.

44:02

I thought that was extraordinary. Like

44:04

you'd have to have real confidence

44:06

in your Wi-Fi connection because imagine

44:09

getting like caught like that and

44:11

you lose your guy and then

44:13

suddenly you're in this fucking glitch

44:15

forever. You mean in a trail?

44:17

Yeah, yeah, they didn't take you

44:19

out. Yeah, exactly, that you're just

44:21

like, eh, eh, eh. You're frozen,

44:23

that's you now? Forever. That's the

44:25

plot of office space. Do you know?

44:27

What is it? I'm just kidding.

44:30

You've just, I feel like, his

44:32

office base is big, right?

44:34

Katie? I'm not crazy. He should

44:37

watch it. He don't have

44:39

to watch it. It's good. It's

44:41

a Mike judge, so Beavis and

44:43

Butthead guy, who later did

44:45

Silicon Valley and all those things.

44:48

But he made this movie

44:50

where a guy gets hypnotized to

44:52

be relaxed. But then the rest

44:55

of the movie, he is...

44:57

basically enlightened like he's just like

44:59

okay okay with everything then he goes to

45:01

his horrible job which he hates and he

45:03

keeps falling upward because it's it's a little

45:05

bit like being there okay yeah a little

45:08

bit like it's a not it's that class classic

45:10

kind of I see it what if you were

45:12

simple yeah got you loved life Yes, I

45:14

see that. Yeah, you don't have

45:16

to see it. Have you had,

45:19

what did you scribble down by

45:21

the way? It's with nail and

45:23

I for Americans. Yeah, yeah, that's

45:26

what it is. You know, let

45:28

me say this in British, it's

45:30

with nail and I'm just kidding.

45:33

I wrote down dad, your

45:35

dad hit you. I felt like

45:37

two things, your wife going

45:39

to terro, but also, not

45:41

like in a, in a, It's

45:43

just something that audiences always get a

45:46

bit uneasy with and I always try

45:48

to go. There's something in it, but

45:50

I don't know what it is. But

45:53

do you, here's the most obvious question

45:55

you can ask. I also grew up

45:57

in that place of wanting to make.

45:59

make everybody laugh to make everything okay. Yeah,

46:02

yeah, yeah. Are we in the ballpark? Yeah,

46:04

yeah. But it's, and that like, that's the

46:06

thing, it makes you a great comedian. It

46:08

does. Because if you're kind of having to

46:10

kind of like hypervigilance. Yeah, yeah, it's. I

46:12

also have this joke, sorry, it's sort

46:15

of. No, no. I get you

46:17

off. No, no, no, I was

46:19

done. I was saying poker is

46:21

the game for people who didn't

46:23

know, who didn't trust how anybody

46:26

said they were feeling. So like

46:28

the whole game is, you're acting

46:30

weird, right? That's a hyper-vigilant child's

46:32

game. It's a traumatized person's game.

46:34

The way you bet made me

46:37

not believe you? That's a traumatized

46:39

kid. It's funny that, isn't it?

46:41

But I wouldn't necessarily say I

46:43

was traumatized. Just, what is this

46:45

stiff upper lip time? I don't know

46:47

if what it is, it's just like,

46:50

it was just something that happened in

46:52

all of our childhoods in the 80s.

46:54

And I think that is a starting

46:56

point to where we are now. I

46:58

often think is interesting that to, you

47:00

know, like the, like the Dutch. No,

47:02

I'm sorry. the swedes one yeah yeah

47:04

yeah but the interesting like now it's

47:07

completely illegal and and what's really fascinating

47:09

is I was in a queue recently

47:11

on my way to the airport and

47:13

this quite old dad in England hit

47:15

his son and I was really surprised how

47:17

everyone was kind of like quite awkward and

47:19

I went oy what the fuck are you

47:22

doing like that because that's gonna calm the

47:24

situation down isn't it like you know what

47:26

I mean it's right it's right little boy

47:28

I'm gonna fuck your dad up like that's

47:31

gonna make it fine like not your child

47:33

not your child relax but so obviously there

47:35

is something there go I don't know it

47:37

was sort of it all kind of calmed

47:39

down and the guy I came out with

47:42

such aggression that the guy went oh but

47:44

you know when you see you see someone

47:46

hit their kid you're like oh what the

47:48

fuck I may say that's why I care

47:50

a hero in that story but I don't

47:53

I just can't imagine maybe that's what I

47:55

find interesting about it that now I have

47:57

this this little boy I just can't imagine

47:59

ever kind of hitting him so trying

48:02

to understand what had happened to

48:04

my dad to make me do it I find

48:06

immediately interesting and it wasn't like brutal it

48:08

wasn't awful it was just something that happened but

48:10

it's inconceivable to me right and maybe that's where

48:12

it's from Do you know what I mean?

48:15

Yeah, I'm with you. I have a joke right

48:17

now where I talk about how I raise

48:19

my daughter and I want her to know that

48:21

she has it better than I had it and

48:23

I talk about my father, but then I

48:25

talk about how my father had it worse than

48:28

I had it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've talked about

48:30

that joke a lot because it took a

48:32

lot of work to get the balance, right,

48:34

for justice, and it ends with my father

48:36

sort of winning or getting a little respect.

48:38

And the joke ends, I don't mind out

48:40

of context, it doesn't matter. I go like,

48:43

we cut to my father's childhood a six

48:45

years old, he has two full-time jobs and

48:47

he's eating a broken glass sandwich. Yeah. And

48:49

I'm like, that's... So again, I don't know

48:51

how we make it funny, but it is

48:54

interesting to think that like, when

48:56

I look at what people are

48:58

doing... politically or in any way

49:00

that I don't understand. I'm often

49:02

like these these people might not

49:04

be resourced like my father your

49:06

father wasn't certainly wasn't resourced in

49:08

the way that you and I

49:10

are a resource meaning the internet

49:12

alone meaning YouTube's on gentle parenting

49:14

therapy meaning just food delivery meaning

49:17

like commercialized farming for all the evils

49:19

of it we're not worried about a

49:21

world war we're not there's like a

49:23

lot going on that gives us the

49:25

resources to know to not hit our

49:27

kids that our fathers, given the same

49:29

resources, would have rose to the opportunity as

49:32

well. I don't think there's something evil

49:34

or, you know, fundamentally broken about them.

49:36

I do think it's a cultural thing.

49:38

Definitely. And they probably had... way more

49:40

empathy than the dads that came before

49:42

them. Absolutely. And the dads before them

49:44

were kind of just coming out of

49:46

like, you know, First World, Second World

49:48

War, it's all that. So it's, that's

49:50

what's. And what will our kids do

49:52

that they'll look on us and be

49:54

like, can you believe? Can you believe?

49:56

Can you believe our parents let us

49:58

go on social media? Yeah. Like when

50:00

we were 12. Do you know what I

50:02

mean? Or have phones. I think phones are

50:04

going to... It's interesting because that seems like

50:07

it's here to say. Some sort of digital

50:09

assistant is here to stay. But I do

50:11

worry if that's going to be the smoking.

50:13

It's so funny, isn't it, when you have

50:15

a bit of stand-up that kind of

50:17

oddly resonates, but I had this bit

50:20

from years ago that I was like, I

50:22

feel... sorry for kids today because when

50:24

I was a kid I just had

50:26

to develop a personality whereas now you

50:29

have to develop a brand that you

50:31

that we but we would just sit

50:33

on a wall thinking slowly becoming ourselves

50:35

yeah versus this I can't imagine what

50:38

it must be like to tangibly know

50:40

how popular you are wow Like, you know,

50:42

that we had to guess it and often

50:44

we weren't, but it didn't matter because we're

50:47

in a state of becoming. Wow. But you

50:49

could take a photo of yourself and go,

50:51

I only got six likes, John got 17

50:53

likes. Yeah. He wins. Like, you know what

50:56

I mean? You're making me realize in junior

50:58

high, me and my friend, urn, his name's

51:00

Aaron. but earn we did something of the

51:02

pop pole we used to rank where we

51:05

thought we were really in the class okay

51:07

and I was arrogant I'd be like I'm

51:09

like a seven and a half I

51:11

think I think you're like a five

51:13

yeah I got ranking him low but

51:16

like at least we were guessing we

51:18

didn't have any data yeah we were

51:20

but and also you really brought conjured

51:22

something up in me which was like there

51:24

was so much time to just kind

51:26

of like be deeply bored and imagine

51:28

like as adults is bad enough because

51:30

you're never not blasted with kind of

51:33

information you're like you can never be

51:35

bored anymore it's impossible yeah because there's

51:37

so much kind of at you whereas

51:39

as a kid you know I remember

51:41

just being in the back of mommy

51:43

dad's car and I used to watch

51:45

the kind of rain droplets kind of

51:47

hit one hit another and suddenly like

51:49

that and they would just go really

51:51

quickly and that was ten minutes that

51:54

was our Netflix but but you

51:56

sort of that weird thing of

51:58

going That's kind of mindfulness. because

52:00

you're just like just watching the water

52:02

on that once hit that once hit

52:04

that and there it goes yeah you

52:06

know but just trying to kind of

52:08

I don't know just sit and drift the

52:11

way I'm not trying to be dirty the

52:13

way that I would kind of conceptualize shitting

52:15

as a kid I'd be like yeah oh

52:17

they're like I'd have to like do these

52:20

mental games to like get cozy, get comfortable,

52:22

do it. It was the weirdest thing. Really?

52:24

Yeah, I'd pretend there was a lever on

52:27

my leg that if I pushed it up,

52:29

it would like push the pump on and

52:31

stuff. But like, now, that's the key

52:33

time, but like, being there for the

52:35

presence, like, of shitting, practicing the presence

52:37

and poop, everything was an event and

52:40

everything I was 100% there for. Or

52:42

at least distracting myself. Yeah, I wish

52:44

I, I mean I'd never had that

52:46

issue as a young man. I was

52:48

just, oh yeah, it was kind of,

52:50

I'd have to have a lever that

52:52

stopped it, it was just like instantly.

52:55

Yeah, just, and then, and then just

52:57

kind of like. Everything I do is

52:59

quick, it's kind of so, it's an

53:01

adult now, like that, like that,

53:03

like going for food when my

53:05

wife, it drives her into saying.

53:07

Why, because you eat so fast?

53:09

Just eat quickly. Well, that's a

53:12

trauma response as well. It's just

53:14

like that, to take him so

53:16

right? Yeah, yeah, it's kind of, yeah,

53:18

before it's gone. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

53:20

Yeah, I don't know. Maybe that's

53:23

just the way. the way we

53:25

are, but you end up looking at the

53:27

way you were raised. And I love my

53:29

mom and dad, they're great, and I don't

53:31

want to be disparaging about them in any

53:33

way, but it's just that they are an interesting

53:35

base level for me to then kind of

53:37

think about being a parent, do you know

53:40

what I mean? And you'll do better and

53:42

they'll do better. They'll do better than us.

53:44

They're amazing grandparents, amazing, and my dad is

53:46

so kind of like so kind of like

53:48

so kind of like so kind of like

53:50

so kind of like, This episode is brought

53:53

to us by our friends at Turtle Beach,

53:55

now that my daughter is finally at a

53:57

cruising altitude age, meaning I get a little

53:59

bit... more free time. I'm so happy

54:01

to say video games are back on

54:04

the menu. And thanks to Turtle Beach

54:06

gaming headphones, which I'm wearing right now.

54:08

Online gaming is so much more comfortable

54:10

and fun with my friends. It's bringing

54:13

me back to those classic memories of

54:15

nights and days with my friends Matt

54:17

and Tom where we would play call

54:19

duty together online. It's not just gaming,

54:22

it's an experience. And these are actual

54:24

cherished memories of mine. And back when

54:26

we were playing, we were using that

54:28

rinky dink-dink It's almost like a free

54:30

headset that they would give you, unlike

54:33

a crappy airline. It felt like crap,

54:35

and it sounded even worse. But Turtle

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57:33

Have you ever pooped your pants?

57:35

Yeah, okay, here we are. Yeah,

57:37

yeah, yeah, like you do it

57:39

so fast. No, I did it.

57:41

This is how, so I, I did it

57:44

on the phone to my

57:46

friend Al, like that, like that

57:48

thing, we were just chatting away

57:51

and I kind of fought

57:53

and went, oh, fuck. And he's

57:55

like, what's wrong? And I've

57:57

shit myself, I've got to go.

58:00

And then that, I think kind

58:02

of caught him back, yeah. But

58:04

yeah, just, I've done it. Usually,

58:07

there's like stories of

58:09

shame and all this stuff and

58:11

you're just like, oh, yeah, oh,

58:13

I've shipped myself again. Then he's

58:15

like, I've got you, call me

58:17

back at 10. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

58:19

It was like that thing of

58:21

like, oh, guess what? Yeah, terrible.

58:24

I was... Have you ever peed yourself as an adult?

58:26

It's crazy that you said that. I was about

58:28

to tell you, I'm not going to say which episode,

58:30

but I was on my way to tape this show.

58:32

And there was such bad traffic, like two and

58:34

a half, I live north of the city, two and

58:37

a half hours in the car, and I had a

58:39

lot of coffee, and I'm like, I'm not going to

58:41

make it. I got a pee now. I'm like looking

58:43

around, I'm like looking around, like looking around, I'm like

58:45

looking around, I'm like looking around, like, like, like,

58:47

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

58:50

like, like, like, like, like, I got an empty water

58:52

bottle. I'm marrying two bottles to empty one. I'm

58:54

like, this is the widest mouth one, but it

58:56

was like a regular, like, you know, plastic water

58:58

bottle. Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, okay, I got

59:00

my dick. and it's pointing into the

59:02

bottle, nobody's looking. It's like, you

59:05

realize how insane it is to

59:07

think someone's looking, unless there's a

59:09

truck, but I'm fine. So I'm

59:11

like, I'm gonna pee. And the

59:13

feeling, Russ, when you are waiting

59:15

for the sound of pee hitting

59:17

the bottom of a bottle, but

59:19

instead you hear the sound of

59:21

pooling piss on a car seat. Yeah,

59:23

yeah, yeah, that's. You're just... No, wrong, wrong

59:25

sound. Yeah, and then you wait for confirmation

59:28

and you had to cut it off So

59:30

now I haven't peed and I'm I had

59:32

to get new pants. I had to change

59:34

everything. It was horrible. Yeah, I had that

59:37

I was remember I was running I was

59:39

running home from Maidivel station where I used

59:41

to live I was running like I was

59:43

so desperate I was like and so angry

59:46

at myself as I was running to going

59:48

why you why did you why did you

59:50

do this do this like you fucking moron?

59:52

There was ample opportunity to piss? and then it

59:55

just and I thought I'm definitely going to make it

59:57

and then it was this like awful moment where you

59:59

like it it It didn't happen and it just

1:00:01

like like all the way down my

1:00:03

jeans and still like running like running

1:00:05

and pissing like like sounds great. Ah

1:00:07

but but then and then getting up

1:00:09

the stairs I didn't the street was

1:00:11

bad you know that was and I

1:00:13

was famous at this point so the

1:00:15

street is bad but it was the

1:00:17

the run up the stairs just in

1:00:19

case I met anyone else who lived

1:00:22

in my building just like I've never

1:00:24

run so quick just that. It really

1:00:26

this isn't being funny it made me

1:00:28

realize it made me realize. The unhouse

1:00:30

people and a lot of people smell

1:00:32

like pee on the street. I'm not

1:00:34

trying to be funny. How fundamentally degrading

1:00:36

and shameful it is. Because when I

1:00:39

had peepy pants, I was like. If

1:00:41

someone sees this moment, it's a moment. Yeah,

1:00:43

yeah. It would be a mercy. You'd be

1:00:45

doing me a favor if you cut my

1:00:47

head off. Yes. And then the thing at

1:00:49

least I peed myself after I died. Yes,

1:00:52

the muscles are gone. Yes. And it's just

1:00:54

that thing of like, it also doesn't matter

1:00:56

what you've done in your life. No, now

1:00:58

you're the people. If your friends saw you,

1:01:00

that's it. It's always at your funeral. You

1:01:02

know, you know what I mean? It was

1:01:04

horrible. Yeah, and I'm driving here and there

1:01:06

was so much traffic that there was time

1:01:09

for it to dry So I had at

1:01:11

least I walked out and changed with

1:01:13

dry bands But it's also I that's

1:01:15

what's so brilliant about stand-up is that

1:01:17

you can kind of it's that thing

1:01:19

of like if you ever had a

1:01:21

moment that horrific and then audience is

1:01:24

like a they might not have a

1:01:26

be, they might have been, yeah, I

1:01:28

know, and it's sort of, that's the

1:01:30

human experience everyone's going through. It's like

1:01:32

a break up, thoughts, the wrong things,

1:01:34

said the wrong thing, done the wrong

1:01:36

thing, done the wrong thing. Yeah, you

1:01:39

were fired. Why did I say that?

1:01:41

It becomes your, why did I say that?

1:01:43

It becomes your job. Well, the thing that

1:01:45

I thought I could turn into a bit

1:01:47

of mine. And we dug a hole. My

1:01:49

idea. I was like just dig a hole.

1:01:51

You're very good at this by the way.

1:01:53

You put out the banner. This is what

1:01:55

the joke is about. You ever let yourself

1:01:57

down? Yeah, sometimes people tell you who they

1:01:59

are. So this is me going like

1:02:01

men are easy. Yeah, that's the premise.

1:02:03

As I dig a hole with little

1:02:05

boy Dean, and we love this hole,

1:02:08

and I go, this is my one

1:02:10

party trick at a beach, I'm like,

1:02:12

let's dig another hole, then we'll dig

1:02:14

a tunnel between the two holes. This

1:02:16

is incredible to both me and Dean.

1:02:18

We dig a second hole, and I

1:02:20

dig, you know, we're twisting our hands,

1:02:23

we meet in the middle, we touch

1:02:25

our hands, and we're like thrilledled there's

1:02:27

a tunnel, there's a tunnel between these

1:02:29

two holes between these two holes. And

1:02:31

then I realized I was waiting for

1:02:33

one of the girls to notice. This

1:02:35

is the bit that my wife was

1:02:37

like, this goes with your, I'm so

1:02:40

enamored with women. And I was just

1:02:42

kind of waiting. I'm telling you, this

1:02:44

is embarrassing. This is like being myself

1:02:46

in the car. I'm waiting for one

1:02:48

of the moms to go tunnel. And

1:02:50

one of them did, Dean's mom, Nelly

1:02:52

went tunnel. And I was like, like,

1:02:55

just see our sand tunnels. Was that,

1:02:57

were you glowing because you were, that

1:02:59

you'd made a tunnel? Or was it

1:03:01

because you wanted her to notice that

1:03:03

as an adult, you were sensitive and

1:03:05

you were providing this kid with a

1:03:07

moment. What is that? Well, Russ, thank

1:03:09

you for giving me this gracious out

1:03:12

that I wanted her to notice that

1:03:14

I was being a good dad to

1:03:16

her, like, a parent. Yeah. No, I

1:03:18

wanted her to see the quality and

1:03:20

depth of our tunnel. That's interesting. And

1:03:22

I appreciate your line of question because

1:03:24

the audience doesn't get to ask questions

1:03:27

and now when I do the story

1:03:29

I'll be like I want to be

1:03:31

clear It wasn't that I wanted to

1:03:33

be potty, a good supervisor. Well that's

1:03:35

even funnier now. I wanted her to

1:03:37

see how dope my tunnel was. Yeah.

1:03:39

And it felt so good. When I've

1:03:41

gone camping too, like let's say there's

1:03:44

a group here and we have our

1:03:46

fire, there's a group there making their

1:03:48

fire. It's like, everybody wants the better

1:03:50

fire. Yeah. Like there's just like a

1:03:52

competition show-off thing happening. But that's definitely

1:03:54

a weird male. Yeah, look at the

1:03:56

tunnel. Yeah, I had to think of

1:03:59

that. Do you want makes me know?

1:04:01

Whenever we have someone around our house

1:04:03

to fix stuff, like, you know, I,

1:04:05

when my son was born, I had

1:04:07

to come back to get something to

1:04:09

take for my wife. Like, I think

1:04:11

clothes or something, and it's just, I,

1:04:13

you know, got the wrong stuff, and

1:04:16

then drove out to hospital, fucked up,

1:04:18

came back, and accidentally crashed the car

1:04:20

into the gate. of our house. So

1:04:22

then I have to then go back

1:04:24

with the stuff to my wife say

1:04:26

I've crashed the car into the gate.

1:04:28

She's like how. She says a very

1:04:31

good question. I don't really know. And

1:04:33

then some guys came around to fix

1:04:35

the gate. And I always do this

1:04:37

thing where, if it's anyone who's kind

1:04:39

of like working in sort of like

1:04:41

a manual labour job, I hear myself

1:04:43

swearing a lot more often than I

1:04:46

should. Do you know what I mean?

1:04:48

I'm like, oh boy's fucking, you know

1:04:50

what I mean, fucking sorry about the

1:04:52

old fucking gait, do you want me?

1:04:54

I sound like a streets album. I

1:04:56

sound like a streets album. I'm doing

1:04:58

an impression, if I bring my car

1:05:00

into a mechanic, I start... being like

1:05:03

my dad. I might put on a

1:05:05

boss and accent just to be like,

1:05:07

yeah. Or I'll go, maybe the fan

1:05:09

belt. They're like, it's a Tesla. But

1:05:11

it is, it's so funny, it's that

1:05:13

I love those moments where you're just,

1:05:15

but when you're hyper aware, like even

1:05:18

you're, there's part of my brain going,

1:05:20

why are you doing this? And you're

1:05:22

like, not now. Not now, don't let

1:05:24

the men see proper men. This is

1:05:26

a brownie. I haven't talked to a

1:05:28

comic in a while, so forgive me,

1:05:30

I'm just doing bits of you. But

1:05:32

my daughter, we broke our garage, what

1:05:35

brought it to mine. We? I don't

1:05:37

know, the garage broke, is the passive

1:05:39

voice. We is too much active voice.

1:05:41

The garage is broken. Yes, yes. So

1:05:43

we called the guy, and he had

1:05:45

an eye patch, and I've never felt

1:05:47

like more of a grown up ignoring

1:05:50

ignoring it. Yeah. was talking to him,

1:05:52

like he didn't have an eye patch

1:05:54

and my daughter was there and I

1:05:56

was like, look at dad at just

1:05:58

not being weird with a guy with

1:06:00

an eye patch. It turned into this

1:06:02

great bit. But he was a real,

1:06:04

he was such a man's man, he

1:06:07

had an eye patch, which you know

1:06:09

there's a story. There's definitely a great

1:06:11

story. And you want desperately to know,

1:06:13

but like, were you kind of like

1:06:15

talking like that a lot and just

1:06:17

kind of? Well there's the shock when

1:06:19

you were you were you zoning in

1:06:22

on the good eye- Okay, the felt

1:06:24

one yes, I'll give that a little

1:06:26

he doesn't know what's the same. Yeah,

1:06:28

I'm just looking at everything Shameless yeah

1:06:30

in the good way you ever almost

1:06:32

die? How about is that a question

1:06:34

for you to me for you? Yeah,

1:06:36

from me to you Car crashes. Yeah,

1:06:39

car crashes. Yeah, car crashes Yeah, car

1:06:41

crashes Gate crash like a motorbike crashed

1:06:43

into me once I hit a snow

1:06:45

plow once the only day it snowed.

1:06:47

Wait a motorbike hit you once? Yeah,

1:06:49

yeah. I was in a car but

1:06:51

kind of it went over and flipped

1:06:54

over it was his fault he came

1:06:56

into me like he went around a

1:06:58

bollard and then crashed in the middle

1:07:00

of London as well as awful. I

1:07:02

bought my wife a car one Christmas

1:07:04

and I was... driving the car to

1:07:06

give it to her and I crashed

1:07:08

that into the back of a van

1:07:11

so then on bringing it to her

1:07:13

yeah Christmas Eve yeah and then it

1:07:15

was on this guy was like you

1:07:17

know it's my job you thought you

1:07:19

know and I'm so sorry man I'm

1:07:21

terrible so to driving and me are

1:07:23

yeah bad driver yeah bad I just

1:07:26

can't can't concentrate don't have the skills

1:07:28

so I just kind of I'm all

1:07:30

right but I have to really Style

1:07:32

stay there are you like looking for

1:07:34

a Mountain Dew on the ground? Yeah,

1:07:36

I'm really about yeah, and just flicking

1:07:38

the radio just kind of you know

1:07:41

board board and Not good. Yeah, this

1:07:43

is why I'm very breaky very breaky

1:07:45

and just kind of you know So

1:07:47

if I'm in the car with somebody

1:07:49

else hyper vigilant on it, you know,

1:07:51

if I was driving my son Yeah

1:07:53

Yeah, yeah, driving them on for that.

1:07:55

But if I'm on my own, yeah.

1:07:58

It's only me. It's only me. So

1:08:00

yeah, that's many stories. This is why

1:08:02

stand up is got to be the

1:08:04

thing that's exciting enough to turn off

1:08:06

this ADD-ish kind of. Yeah, well, it's

1:08:08

funny, isn't it? Because it's like, I

1:08:10

don't know if it's the same here,

1:08:13

but there's loads of comics in the

1:08:15

UK that have got ADD and they're

1:08:17

kind of talking about it. to me

1:08:19

it's just like how our audience is

1:08:21

surprised right like like who looked at

1:08:23

one of us and was like it's

1:08:25

a bit like a football going I've

1:08:27

got muscles in my legs right yeah

1:08:30

it's I don't say wouldn't you say

1:08:32

kitty it's like 99% of guests I'm

1:08:34

like oh we both have 80D yeah

1:08:36

and you can tell when you're talking

1:08:38

to somebody that has 80D you're like

1:08:40

oh or where you think up it

1:08:42

becomes like a beautiful way yeah well

1:08:45

that's that's that's completely it's completely it's

1:08:47

completely it's completely it's completely it's completely

1:08:49

it's stand up and you're just able

1:08:51

to kind of just pick different bits

1:08:53

but it's yeah I went for this

1:08:55

I went for this test at my

1:08:57

wife's behest she was like she's talking

1:08:59

to a friend of hers and her

1:09:02

friend had done this kind of you

1:09:04

know questionnaire and my wife is I

1:09:06

walk the questions and she said them

1:09:08

and my wife was thinking of me

1:09:10

just going tick tick tick tick tick

1:09:12

tick tick she came home and she

1:09:14

was like I think you're the OG

1:09:17

of this and then I went and

1:09:19

you know kind of got it and

1:09:21

then they gave me some tablets and

1:09:23

again you know classic me I was

1:09:25

like going well this might make me

1:09:27

an even better human being I like

1:09:29

you know and I kind of did

1:09:31

it for a week and I did

1:09:34

a few shows and I couldn't access

1:09:36

me yeah because I you know and

1:09:38

I was like fuck that yeah just

1:09:40

you know this I don't mind my

1:09:42

brain you know but the idea of

1:09:44

kind of having a sort of a

1:09:46

chemical intervention to make you yeah like

1:09:49

that isn't kind of what makes us

1:09:51

interesting and funny to be kind of

1:09:53

it's that you know it's the kind

1:09:55

of you know the journey around I

1:09:57

think absolutely and you want to be

1:09:59

a little bit fight flight it might

1:10:01

not be the chillest experience for you

1:10:03

body but it's your job. I'll give

1:10:06

you an example from today so after

1:10:08

this I'm going to the DMV my

1:10:10

license about to expire and I woke

1:10:12

up and I wasn't thinking about going

1:10:14

to the DMV I wasn't planning on

1:10:16

it I didn't look at my calendar

1:10:18

I just woke up and immediately got

1:10:21

my passport and put it in my

1:10:23

pocket because some part of my brain

1:10:25

is going DMV like in a not

1:10:27

chill way you could call it anxiety

1:10:29

yeah but I was like thank you

1:10:31

and then on my way here I

1:10:33

got a text from the woman that

1:10:36

set it up for me and she

1:10:38

goes don't forget your passport and I

1:10:40

was like yeah I would have if

1:10:42

I didn't have this brain so if

1:10:44

you calm me down a lot of

1:10:46

stuff goes away that's very useful yeah

1:10:48

it's very very useful totally and have

1:10:50

you nearly died Yeah, when I was

1:10:53

little I got sucked out by a

1:10:55

riptide my dad held on to me.

1:10:57

Oh, and he said he pulled me

1:10:59

out and I was head to toe

1:11:01

in sand It's a classic kind of

1:11:03

family story Wow, I'm trying to think

1:11:05

of other I've been very very drunk

1:11:08

and walked into traffic and someone's pulled

1:11:10

me back Wow, like in New York.

1:11:12

It's one of those. Yeah, those are

1:11:14

classic. I'm off it. Yeah, are you?

1:11:16

Not really. No, I'm I'm okay with

1:11:18

it's okay with it's one of those

1:11:20

conversations with friend of mine as a

1:11:22

bit of a, well he's an alcoholic

1:11:25

and it's that thing of he, I

1:11:27

didn't realize the strain that he was

1:11:29

under and I've just never and he

1:11:31

was so envious of me that I

1:11:33

could go I really fancy a glass

1:11:35

of wine and just have a glass

1:11:37

of wine and then stop and he

1:11:40

was like how do you do that?

1:11:42

Yeah he just had to go all

1:11:44

in and I didn't realize he did

1:11:46

a brilliant show about it and I

1:11:48

didn't realize, watching the strain that he

1:11:50

was under. to kind of go, right,

1:11:52

I will not drink today. I will

1:11:54

not drink today. Do you know what

1:11:57

I mean? It's like, yeah, I'm very

1:11:59

fortunate that I can just have a

1:12:01

beer and it's fine. Yeah, interesting. No

1:12:03

vices? Not really, like, no, I guess,

1:12:05

it's odd really, isn't it? What are

1:12:07

my voices? I like football manager. like

1:12:09

FPL I guess football like soccer is

1:12:12

my big thing that's a release for

1:12:14

you. Oh it's funny because when I

1:12:16

was looking at our differences just because

1:12:18

I was like oh I feel like

1:12:20

very similar guy the two ways that

1:12:22

we differ one you economic so you

1:12:24

got like a math mine yeah and

1:12:26

also well yeah sort of I got

1:12:29

swept a long way everybody else oh

1:12:31

really and did that a university. I

1:12:33

just didn't come from that kind of

1:12:35

background. I'd love to have done like

1:12:37

drama or history or something like that

1:12:39

or philosophy. But I just didn't, you

1:12:41

know, I was just kind of a

1:12:44

very average kid. And I was like,

1:12:46

what's everyone else doing? Are we, you

1:12:48

know, I understand. But you know, but

1:12:50

the other one is sport. Yeah, I

1:12:52

love it. I can't vanish into a

1:12:54

group. Oh, man, honestly. There's something about,

1:12:56

I don't think, it's interesting, we're talking

1:12:58

about mindfulness, because I've tried doing things

1:13:01

of that, because I've tried doing things

1:13:03

of that. I just can't switch myself

1:13:05

off, but if I'm playing football, and

1:13:07

specifically if I get the ball, and

1:13:09

there's kind of defenders coming towards me

1:13:11

and I see a forward moving, I'm

1:13:13

so in the zone, like you don't

1:13:16

think about anything else, you can just

1:13:18

see the pass you're about to make,

1:13:20

you're so there. Yeah, yeah, of course.

1:13:22

I love that football and stand-up of

1:13:24

the two things. Close team. utter flow

1:13:26

state when I remember finding football when

1:13:28

I was nine just going well this

1:13:30

is what that's what I'm gonna do

1:13:33

for the rest of my life like

1:13:35

there's not there's and it was a

1:13:37

very similar experience with stand-up doing the

1:13:39

first gig I was going well this

1:13:41

is it like I can put everything

1:13:43

through this so oddly I would say

1:13:45

stand-up is probably my vice yeah like

1:13:48

in terms of healthy addiction it's but

1:13:50

it is an addiction like because you're

1:13:52

kind of like you're putting real life

1:13:54

through life through it you know and

1:13:56

it's kind of it's so funny you're

1:13:58

putting real life because so you you

1:14:00

always have this part of your brain

1:14:03

so rather than being there you're like

1:14:05

so my friend Joe who is supporting

1:14:07

me on the American tour he was

1:14:09

telling me this this story about he

1:14:11

was telling my wife actually and me

1:14:13

about his daughter, he was just going,

1:14:15

you know, my daughter's so mean to

1:14:17

my wife. And she's 16 and my

1:14:20

wife will just go, oh, did you

1:14:22

get something for your packed lunch for

1:14:24

school? And she's like, yes, I did.

1:14:26

See your dad, love you. Like that.

1:14:28

And my wife kind of giggled and

1:14:30

I went write it down. Like, do

1:14:32

you know what I mean? And it's

1:14:35

rather than, like, I know we're all

1:14:37

enjoying this moment, but you need to

1:14:39

write that because that's funny. continue. Yeah,

1:14:41

yeah, yeah. But you know what I

1:14:43

mean? But it was, you're stepping out

1:14:45

of that. Yeah, yeah. And it's, but

1:14:47

that, I guess it's an addiction, but

1:14:49

I never really had that with, I

1:14:52

don't know, like, I feel very, very

1:14:54

lucky, but like, booze and drugs, just.

1:14:56

I don't know, never really, I was

1:14:58

quite, but also I think the era

1:15:00

that I came up in in the

1:15:02

UK, there's a brilliant comedian called Daniel

1:15:04

Kitson. Yeah, Daniel, yeah, this is great.

1:15:07

So I supported him when I was

1:15:09

young and he was like this kind

1:15:11

of, you know, and still is. you

1:15:13

know one of the greats and he's

1:15:15

too total so there's a whole generation

1:15:17

of us that didn't really drink because

1:15:19

we wanted to be like Dan so

1:15:21

he inadvertently made everyone kind of straight-laced

1:15:24

yeah yeah you know what I mean

1:15:26

like in a way that if a

1:15:28

kennerson had come through yes that there

1:15:30

would have been yes those repercussions I

1:15:32

came off the back of like Seinfeld

1:15:34

and Ray Romano and Ellen and and

1:15:36

now there's I don't know if Nate

1:15:39

Burgats or Gaffigan have that but they're

1:15:41

definitely not like pirates yeah yeah yeah

1:15:43

yeah yeah they don't have that you

1:15:45

said kennison did you for here's a

1:15:47

question when you first going to stand

1:15:49

up were you nervous that or that

1:15:51

you were just too ordinary and like

1:15:53

like you know that thing you know

1:15:56

I've got well a comic has to

1:15:58

be you know a smoker and a

1:16:00

squash bucker and you know in kind

1:16:02

of when I was starting in New

1:16:04

York like three out of five comedians

1:16:06

had like that uh S&M studded punk

1:16:08

rock belt yeah isn't even on their

1:16:11

pants I know exactly. And I'm like,

1:16:13

what? And there were fingerless gloves and

1:16:15

leather jackets and spike tear with like,

1:16:17

Blee, corn t-shirts. And I'm like, what?

1:16:19

And this is just big Jay Okerson

1:16:21

bird. I'm just saying a lot of

1:16:23

the seller guys were looked like they

1:16:25

just finished a DePesh mode photo shoot.

1:16:28

Yeah. And then I was wearing like

1:16:30

a navy polo and khakis because I

1:16:32

wanted to be like that. And more

1:16:34

so. It's a generous question that lit

1:16:36

me up. More so a lot, not

1:16:38

so many of those guys were absolutely

1:16:40

brilliant. I'm not shitting on them. A

1:16:43

lot of the not so brilliant guys,

1:16:45

like nine out of 10, their clothes

1:16:47

would be about squirting or jeez, like

1:16:49

it was just, that's what a comedian

1:16:51

was. Imagine what we find offensive, but

1:16:53

like way, way, way more, like stuff

1:16:55

you're not even gonna quote. So there

1:16:58

was an outsiderness to that as well.

1:17:00

And believe it or not. It's weird

1:17:02

to put me against Nate is so

1:17:04

huge. I'm just saying like we were

1:17:06

weird. Nobody was going like, you guys

1:17:08

are doing the right thing. If Blangazzi

1:17:10

would go on stage, I'd say that

1:17:12

if he was sitting here. And we'd

1:17:15

have these like soft sets, but there'd

1:17:17

be the nine. Canadian college kids that

1:17:19

are there are fucking loving it. Yeah,

1:17:21

but there are a lot of people

1:17:23

that look like a gathering of the

1:17:25

juggalos that are like, what the fuck

1:17:27

is this? No disrespect, juggalos, you've been

1:17:30

coming up a lot, you've been on

1:17:32

my mind. It's funny though, isn't it?

1:17:34

It's that, but I, but I, so

1:17:36

I guess the thing is you then

1:17:38

you end up finding your own kind

1:17:40

of people. Yes. And it's sort of

1:17:42

like, like, yeah. But it was just

1:17:44

like in the UK there was lots

1:17:47

of kind of like really brilliant comics

1:17:49

that had like a power 20 That

1:17:51

was the thing you'd call it in

1:17:53

the UK so that 20 minutes and

1:17:55

you just Decimate any room and then

1:17:57

there would be people you'd have like

1:17:59

the university circuit where you do a

1:18:02

20 minute and then the headline would

1:18:04

do an hour and it was sort

1:18:06

of, you know, people like John Oliver,

1:18:08

Kitson, Ross Noble, the Mighty Boosh, like

1:18:10

though, that sort of era. But you

1:18:12

couldn't really do that in a comedy

1:18:14

club because you just weren't as tight

1:18:16

as somebody. It's funny, I didn't want

1:18:19

to ask you this, but you've given

1:18:21

me this window. When I watched Eddie

1:18:23

hazard, is odd. But it also, I

1:18:25

hadn't realised just how it sounds, if

1:18:27

you say in a cockney voice, that

1:18:29

Eddie is hard, as in his, is

1:18:31

hard. I love that. He's hard, he's

1:18:34

hard, he's hard, he's fucking hard as

1:18:36

nails. But would you say well hard?

1:18:38

You'd say well hard. He's well hard.

1:18:40

He's well hard. Well, I was thinking

1:18:42

that like propaganda is. proper gander give

1:18:44

it a propaganda yeah yeah but that's

1:18:46

it but you kind of it was

1:18:48

only like the other day a cake

1:18:51

of us I'm having a propaganda so

1:18:53

I'll have it right look around where

1:18:55

you have one of one of your

1:18:57

bits is that all of these my

1:18:59

minorities yeah yeah that was I died

1:19:01

yeah yeah that was I died yeah

1:19:03

well that was a I died yeah

1:19:06

well that was a bit the queen

1:19:08

saying these are minorities do you mind

1:19:10

if I say the bunch like no

1:19:12

how can I be racist some of

1:19:14

my best colonies or But that took

1:19:16

quite a lot of, to get it

1:19:18

there, like that took ages, because it

1:19:20

was like, some of my best colonies

1:19:23

are like, they're minorities, they're mine. And

1:19:25

then I had a tag to that,

1:19:27

which I didn't use in the end,

1:19:29

which was common wealth. common well but

1:19:31

that it just too much just elongated

1:19:33

it a bit and they were just

1:19:35

you know the audience if you were

1:19:38

in America you would have looked at

1:19:40

your notes and then gone calm well

1:19:42

and we would have been like thank

1:19:44

you for the privilege of your process

1:19:46

yeah I love that it's so no

1:19:48

I don't I wouldn't trade no I've

1:19:50

lost I'm well hey but that's why

1:19:53

but this like the the the and

1:19:55

we've even stopped in your word, the

1:19:57

special, that didn't exist. You know, just

1:19:59

you'd have a DVD, no, not even

1:20:01

that, you'd have DVDs or like a

1:20:03

video, but it was never like the

1:20:05

special, you know what I mean? And

1:20:07

it kind of, I think it was

1:20:10

probably around that kind of, you know,

1:20:12

the HBO specials, bring the pain and

1:20:14

all that, you know, that boom, and

1:20:16

you just go like, wow, but the

1:20:18

world is so small now that you

1:20:20

can kind of, you know. See a

1:20:22

Michael Shea special and then he can

1:20:25

do gigs in London or you know,

1:20:27

you can do gigs in Stockholm. But

1:20:29

what were you going to say about

1:20:31

Isard? Oh, I used to watch, thank

1:20:33

you. Are you hosting the show? Oh

1:20:35

no, hey, come on. Well done. I

1:20:37

like asking questions. Yeah, you do, I

1:20:39

love it. It's very generous. I just

1:20:42

used to watch his specials and go,

1:20:44

how do you make this act? Like

1:20:46

because it's not the power 20, what

1:20:48

you were saying, it's the complete opposite.

1:20:50

This is like these long, and I'm

1:20:52

like, are there more places that let

1:20:54

newer people stretch out for 20 minutes?

1:20:57

Do you even want a new person

1:20:59

stretching out for 20 minutes? I don't

1:21:01

know where you cultivate an act like

1:21:03

that. I think he was... because he

1:21:05

was such a trailblazer I think he

1:21:07

was in his own state and he

1:21:09

was in his own so he would

1:21:11

just I think when he was like

1:21:14

a proper stand-up he would start the

1:21:16

tour and by the end of the

1:21:18

tour he'd have a new show and

1:21:20

then he tore again so he was

1:21:22

doing it he was probably doing the

1:21:24

American way yeah I think so and

1:21:26

he was at a stage where he

1:21:29

was so massive like for a while

1:21:31

there he was absolutely huge yeah but

1:21:33

I think in the UK now he

1:21:35

just kind of you know you just

1:21:37

go to like an open mic and

1:21:39

just kind of yeah try out some

1:21:41

stuff like I'm doing some gigs in

1:21:43

Barcelona for the first time in Michelle

1:21:46

Wolf who's a mate of mine lives

1:21:48

there so I've kind of managed to

1:21:50

bunny hop on some show she's doing

1:21:52

lives in Barcelona yeah what yeah yeah

1:21:54

it's crazy yes so Michelle's she moved

1:21:56

to Barcelona yeah I think good for

1:21:58

her I think just wanting to be

1:22:01

outside of America for a bit and

1:22:03

kind of now she's yeah But yeah

1:22:05

she's but I so I'm doing some

1:22:07

gigs in Spain to see what it's

1:22:09

like before I do my actual show.

1:22:11

She does shows out there? Yeah, wow.

1:22:13

Yeah, she does shows all over, kind

1:22:15

of Europe, but she's got her own,

1:22:18

like, and ruin it? Yeah. She moves

1:22:20

to Spain, but she still does stand

1:22:22

up, not like, oh she was so

1:22:24

close to getting out, I'm just kidding.

1:22:26

Oh man, yeah, I bet it's the

1:22:28

best of both. That sounds super fun.

1:22:30

So why haven't you should come and

1:22:33

tour Europe? I would like to bring

1:22:35

the family, bring the family, do it.

1:22:37

Do it. I'm really happy with this

1:22:39

hour. It's at that sweet 45 and

1:22:41

I have the 15 that goes in

1:22:43

and out, like I have to dial

1:22:45

in that last 15, but I'm really

1:22:48

happy with it. Maybe this is the

1:22:50

tour, because my daughter's six, so she's

1:22:52

old enough. No, please. That's my brother.

1:22:54

On the face time? On the old

1:22:56

face time, yeah. He's facing. He's face

1:22:58

time. That's sweet. I would like to

1:23:00

do it. It's my brother's birthday, that's

1:23:02

what it is. Oh. and so I

1:23:05

probably, and he's calling you. He's calling,

1:23:07

well, yeah, I called him, that means

1:23:09

something's happened, which is exciting. Great thing.

1:23:11

An interesting thing, I'll probably do, like,

1:23:13

so they're twins, my brother and sisters,

1:23:15

so something's gone down, both for me

1:23:17

and nice. But yeah, I'm born on

1:23:20

the 24th of March, so we just

1:23:22

get it all out of the way,

1:23:24

so you know right when your parents.

1:23:26

Yeah, exactly. Shall we, go on and

1:23:28

go on and go. There's loads of

1:23:30

spaces, but we don't have, I remember

1:23:32

hearing, Dan Soda was telling me about,

1:23:34

you know, that thing of being able

1:23:37

to go out on a Monday to

1:23:39

New York and try a bit and

1:23:41

then do eight shows. Yeah, by Friday

1:23:43

you have it. And by Friday it's

1:23:45

like muscular. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know,

1:23:47

it's unbelievable. We don't really have that

1:23:49

in the UK. It's getting better, but

1:23:52

you know, you can just drop in

1:23:54

and do three sets in a night,

1:23:56

maybe. That's how I used to be.

1:23:58

It's like, go every night, do it

1:24:00

every night. And now I'm like... I

1:24:02

want to look at the raindrops in

1:24:04

the window a little bit. I want

1:24:06

to give it time to ferment. My

1:24:09

bits are like, you know, kimchi. I

1:24:11

want to bury them and forget about

1:24:13

them. And like we were saying, come

1:24:15

back to them. By the way, Aaron

1:24:17

Sorkin does the same thing. The fourth

1:24:19

draft of his script he writes from

1:24:21

memory. He rewrites it for memory and

1:24:24

anything that he forgot. He's like,

1:24:26

that's not a mistake. Like, like, I

1:24:28

should go. I'll do a show this week

1:24:30

and it'll be amazing. I'll be so

1:24:32

excited. And do you do like the

1:24:35

Largo or something like that? Yeah Largo,

1:24:37

you should do my Largo. I would

1:24:39

love to. Yeah, it'd be amazing. Well

1:24:41

the thing is I just don't have

1:24:44

that many friends. But like genuinely, but

1:24:46

in the American circuit, so I know

1:24:48

Michelle and then she moved to fucking

1:24:50

Spain. It was just like, do you

1:24:53

know what I mean? It's sort of

1:24:55

that, it's the thing I've, one of...

1:24:57

Backstage, the problem is, as an

1:25:00

outsider, shyness and arrogance look identical. Oh

1:25:02

wow. And it's so true that if

1:25:04

you're kind of sat there, it's, and

1:25:06

he was saying it of me, he

1:25:08

was kind of like, I don't, for

1:25:10

whatever reason, if I'm looking

1:25:12

at my notes, he was saying that

1:25:15

I gave off an arrogant vibe. But

1:25:17

it's pure like shy, just concentrate on

1:25:19

words and then get through a gig.

1:25:21

I've done that. But I couldn't wander

1:25:24

up and go, hey, I'm Russell, blah,

1:25:26

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I

1:25:28

came up with Aziz, and Aziz would

1:25:30

always be on his phone. Yeah. And

1:25:33

we're like, because he was really popular,

1:25:35

really blowing up. Yeah. And now I'm

1:25:37

like, no, he's nervous. Yeah, yeah. we

1:25:39

know now yeah it's in arrogance and

1:25:41

what was it arrogance and China shyness

1:25:43

they look identical but it's so true

1:25:46

it's that thing of so I kind

1:25:48

of like and it I really forced

1:25:50

myself to talk to people backstage now

1:25:52

yeah because otherwise but it's that deep

1:25:54

English insecurity that you got I better

1:25:56

not say like they probably think I'm

1:25:58

a dickhead and You know what I

1:26:01

mean you just have all this kind

1:26:03

of awkwardness and then it happens a

1:26:05

lot when you do like celebrity adjacent

1:26:07

things like if you play like a

1:26:09

celebrity football game in the UK and

1:26:11

you know people who might be a

1:26:14

musician or whatever and if you have

1:26:16

the courage to go up to them

1:26:18

and say you're right are you a

1:26:20

bit nervous about playing this football game

1:26:22

because you're a musician I'm a comedian

1:26:25

this is a bit unusual for us

1:26:27

then suddenly yeah you kind of click

1:26:29

and you know I have really good

1:26:31

friends because I've had the courage to

1:26:33

say Yeah. But you don't always have,

1:26:35

you know. Yeah. And that's also the

1:26:38

pretty scroll in the bar. If Chris

1:26:40

Martin is playing the game, you have

1:26:42

to say hello to him. Of course.

1:26:44

Because nobody wants to say. Was it

1:26:46

Chris Martin? It wasn't Chris Martin. It

1:26:48

was, uh... What if it was? Well,

1:26:51

I think we'd get on as well.

1:26:53

But the trouble is, I've done stuff

1:26:55

about his ex-wife, so I think that

1:26:57

might be an ish. No, I'll be

1:26:59

fine. Yeah, he's big in England. Good

1:27:01

guy. Where are you on the meaning

1:27:04

of life? Was it a joke that

1:27:06

you, yeah, straight in? Yeah, fine, let's

1:27:08

go for it. I just last night

1:27:10

did a charity event for Home Boy

1:27:12

Industries and there was a red carpet,

1:27:15

a step and repeat press. So I

1:27:17

put on a suit and I washed

1:27:19

my hair with modern mammals. I know

1:27:21

that sounds crazy. I mean it would

1:27:23

to me. washing your hair before an

1:27:25

event used to be a death sentence.

1:27:28

It would make my hair look fluffy,

1:27:30

puffy, completely out of control. I would

1:27:32

have to fill it with all these

1:27:34

sorts of products, trying to keep it,

1:27:36

give it some sense of flow, some

1:27:38

sense of control, and now all I

1:27:41

do... Every time I want to look

1:27:43

perfect in the hair department is I

1:27:45

wash it with modern mammals. It's a

1:27:47

different kind of shampoo. It's a non-shampoo

1:27:49

shampoo that cleans your hair, but I

1:27:51

wouldn't say it shampoos your hair. It

1:27:54

cleans it like a comb goes through

1:27:56

it, nice and clean, smells great, but

1:27:58

it looks perfect because it leaves behind

1:28:00

just enough of your hair's natural oil

1:28:02

to give it that hold, almost like

1:28:05

you spent the day at the beach.

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You know that perfect feeling you get

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in your hair when you swam in

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the ocean that morning, it. in a

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bottle or you can try their bar

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which is incredibly convenient to travel with

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and it is pH balance and it

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modern mammals because I love them so

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you a really, really long time. You

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You just use it when your hair

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starts to feel dirty. Clean it up,

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but it won't interrupt looking good. Over

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40,000 guys have changed to it. I

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also get a lot of messages from

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women that try it and love it.

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So yes, women can use it as

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well. And once you try it, you're

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absolutely obsessed. I started as a fan.

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thank me, but just look in the

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mirror and be like, dang, I look

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great. That's what I want you to

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do. modernmamels.com/weird. We're also brought to us

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by our friends at Magic Mind. Look,

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look at how many empty bottles of

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this is where I sit and I

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write, and magic mind is basically flow

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state in a in a bottle. I

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don't, they worked so hard, I'm friends

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with James Bishara, who is the CEO

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it's like for athletes, they have gatorade,

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as half a cup of coffee. So

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it's upping you, but it's also calming

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It helps me with my ADDD and

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And it tastes fantastic. And sometimes I

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use promo code weird and get a

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subscription because you are going to love

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it. Trust. All right, back to the

1:30:45

show. Oh yeah, we were going to

1:30:48

get into the meeting of life. And

1:30:50

I was going to just, you said

1:30:52

that there was a, I know you're

1:30:54

not a scientist, was that real? Yeah,

1:30:56

somebody like, there was okay if you

1:30:58

are a... There was this thing of

1:31:01

like somebody... There was a newspaper article

1:31:03

that said I was a Scientologist and

1:31:05

I was charging people money to come

1:31:07

and meet me. I was just an

1:31:09

odd, but I kind of maybe give

1:31:11

off that energy that I would be

1:31:14

kind of like, yeah, he looks like

1:31:16

he might be into sort of other

1:31:18

religions. But no, no, and I certainly

1:31:20

wouldn't. There's kind of a spake, a

1:31:22

lot of people do it in England

1:31:24

where they kind of, you know, extra

1:31:27

tickets for like meat and greets. And

1:31:29

I just like. They thought that was

1:31:31

Scientology? No, but I wouldn't do it.

1:31:33

I did what? It's like, oh, you

1:31:35

don't do that. I wouldn't charge money.

1:31:38

Like, if somebody wanted to vote with

1:31:40

me, I'd take the photo. I wouldn't

1:31:42

be like, that's gonna cost you an

1:31:44

extra 20 quid. But, yeah. Yeah, that's

1:31:46

where it came from. That's a whole